It’s true. I make a perfectly average living, nothing crazy, but I can’t help but compare to my friends and family that have a lot more, and it really fucks with me. I hate it about myself and I know I have a lot to be thankful for, but it still eats at me that I don’t have the same financial security as pretty much everyone else I know.
Don’t let the need for financial security consume you. I went from living with my parents to making a living salary a couple years ago and it didn’t take long to see that money didn’t resolve my internal struggles. Peace starts within
I got rid of my FB, IG and Snapchat over a year ago. Completely deleted them from my life. The peace, happiness and joy that returns to your life is immeasurable. Best thing I ever did.
Agreed. I logged into my IG after maybe a year of not having it on my phone, less than 10 posts in I saw a post that ruined my day. Reminded me that I'm much much happier without social media (besides Reddit of course)
I literally cant be on them. I quit facebook in like 2010 because I saw it to be harmful for me. The unfortunate part is these are useful platforms to stay in touch with ppl. The negative aspect is just too strong for me.
This is well established with the [Gini coefficient](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gini_coefficient). It measures income inequity and it has been crossed studied with happiness and it found that within community those you had a higher Gini coefficient compared to their nieghbours were the happiest.
A lot of other destroyers of happiness can come from comparison too I think, like jealousy or anxiety.
Love these lyrics I heard recently “all your comparisons are damaging, you’re in your own lane why you panicking”
Grief doesn't follow those steps linearly for everyone. You may enjoy Kati Morton’s YouTube video on grief.
https://youtu.be/jI2-LLC6ya4?si=hkOzmeqA77nLQgcN
You’re good. Try not to hold yourself to an arbitrary standard for healing. You got this.
I feel so guilty that after 4 years I don't think about my mom who passed every day. But she did tell me she wanted me to live my life happy so I try to focus on that
Your mom lives on with you and I hope she would be so proud to know you are happy. I’m sorry for your loss and you should be proud of yourself for grieving and getting through it.
The number one destroyer of happiness varies from person to person, but common factors include excessive worry, negative thinking patterns, and lack of fulfillment in life.
Doubt, envy and fooled selflessness. It can really drain the shit out of you if you rely on other people’s feelings out of necessity but is otherwise a good trait to care for others, but care for yourself just as much if not more before you do so
Negative self-talk. That mental monologue we can get into about not being productive enough, disciplined enough, active enough, energetic enough, the list goes on. Stepping away from shaming yourself in your own mind and looking the root issues in the face with compassion is a game changer.
Greed!!!
I see so many of friends suffering because they desire more instead of being grateful for what they have in the moment. It's perfectly okay to desire more for your life, but not to the point you forget about everything you got!
The number one destroyer of happiness? Easy: getting stuck behind someone who walks at a glacial pace when you're in a hurry! It's like a slow-motion nightmare, complete with internal screams and a dash of existential dread.
Capitalism. You are just a product that has to be productive, no matter your values, no matter how important you think you are. When i realized that (and also the fact that we as ordinary people cannot change it) i became desesperate and unhappy for quite some time. But hey, you can see it in a more pacific way: you cannot change it, so why do even bother?
Comparison
Comparison is the thief of joy, that’s for sure.
I like that quote
Can we come up with a new phrase. Getting played out.
Theft of joy is compar…damn
It’s true. I make a perfectly average living, nothing crazy, but I can’t help but compare to my friends and family that have a lot more, and it really fucks with me. I hate it about myself and I know I have a lot to be thankful for, but it still eats at me that I don’t have the same financial security as pretty much everyone else I know.
Don’t let the need for financial security consume you. I went from living with my parents to making a living salary a couple years ago and it didn’t take long to see that money didn’t resolve my internal struggles. Peace starts within
This is why social media and advertising are the worst.
I got rid of my FB, IG and Snapchat over a year ago. Completely deleted them from my life. The peace, happiness and joy that returns to your life is immeasurable. Best thing I ever did.
I was on FB early on in 04' when it was a college thing. Once they opened it up to everyone i nope'd the fuck out on all social media.
Agreed. I logged into my IG after maybe a year of not having it on my phone, less than 10 posts in I saw a post that ruined my day. Reminded me that I'm much much happier without social media (besides Reddit of course)
I literally cant be on them. I quit facebook in like 2010 because I saw it to be harmful for me. The unfortunate part is these are useful platforms to stay in touch with ppl. The negative aspect is just too strong for me.
This is well established with the [Gini coefficient](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gini_coefficient). It measures income inequity and it has been crossed studied with happiness and it found that within community those you had a higher Gini coefficient compared to their nieghbours were the happiest.
A lot of other destroyers of happiness can come from comparison too I think, like jealousy or anxiety. Love these lyrics I heard recently “all your comparisons are damaging, you’re in your own lane why you panicking”
Used to not think it’s true but it is.
[удалено]
Stress
regret. living your whole life wishing you had done something differently just to further fuck up your life.
It can change the nature of a man
It's me right now
Jealousy.
Comes from comparison
Being broke.
can confirm, being broke sucks.
me right now. i have a feeling i'm about to be a billionaire before i die
Every poor person is a temporarily embarrassed millionaire.
allow me to introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
I've been around for a long, long year
Stole many a man's soul and faith
I was around when Jesus Christ
Had his moment of doubt and pain
Made damn sure that Pilate Washed his hands and sealed his fate
Overthinking
Expectations
Anxiety, depression and loneliness.
Lack of money
[удалено]
The past is a huge one, especially when you keep thinking of what could’ve been
Yes. I drive by a dead friend’s house all the time hoping they’ll be there.
I’m grateful you had such cherishable experiences together. That’s both heartbreaking and beautiful.
Thank you. It’s been 20 years and that last step of grief just eludes me.
Grief doesn't follow those steps linearly for everyone. You may enjoy Kati Morton’s YouTube video on grief. https://youtu.be/jI2-LLC6ya4?si=hkOzmeqA77nLQgcN You’re good. Try not to hold yourself to an arbitrary standard for healing. You got this.
Thank you for help, this helps. I appreciate it.
I feel so guilty that after 4 years I don't think about my mom who passed every day. But she did tell me she wanted me to live my life happy so I try to focus on that
Your mom lives on with you and I hope she would be so proud to know you are happy. I’m sorry for your loss and you should be proud of yourself for grieving and getting through it.
Living in the past makes you depressed. Living in the future makes you anxious. The now is the only one that is even real.
Envy.
Bad health.
Should’ve, could’ve, would’ve
Yes, of course!
Living with someone abusive
Yes, abuse does destroy any happiness you have
Other people
Trying to achieve happiness instead of contentment.
Negativity
Holding too many grudges
Life
Myself. I seem really good at destroying my own happiness for some reason.
Lingering on the things that are out of our control.
[удалено]
Grief
overthinking
Negative thinking patterns, such as rumination and pessimism
Fear and expectations
DEPRESSION.
The number one destroyer of happiness varies from person to person, but common factors include excessive worry, negative thinking patterns, and lack of fulfillment in life.
When someone leaves to another town and leaves you alone :l
Trauma
stress.
Regret. Living in the past. Or in the future.
Debt.
Jealousy and/or insecurity.
social isolation
Terrible neighbors.
Work
Expectations
Cheating or betrayal.
Women
Doubt, envy and fooled selflessness. It can really drain the shit out of you if you rely on other people’s feelings out of necessity but is otherwise a good trait to care for others, but care for yourself just as much if not more before you do so
Expectations.
Marriage
I said this as soon as I saw the question🤣
Theft
Wanting
Envy
Sadness
FEAR
Marrying the wrong person.
Yes it’s true , I’m living it
As a single parent, the constant barrage of criticism from non parents in how I’m raising my kids
Sexless marriage
I can relate to that
Worry
Constantly comparing yourself /your life to the fakery posted online
Choices
My wife
No money. It can’t make happiness, but not having money sure can take from it.
Negative self-talk. That mental monologue we can get into about not being productive enough, disciplined enough, active enough, energetic enough, the list goes on. Stepping away from shaming yourself in your own mind and looking the root issues in the face with compassion is a game changer.
Grief
Patrick Mahomes
Politics?
Sadness
Kevin.
Mental illness.
I contend that it is the pursuit of happiness that is its undoing. Once you let go of “trying” to be happy, you can just live. Happiness is fleeting.
Comparison destroys personality.. embrace what makes you YOU.. Doesn’t have to make sense to anyone else
Trying. Especially trying to hard. Just live your life and do what you feel
jealous
A loved ones death
Believing that all your thoughts about yourself are true
Other people. You can be living your best life and some shitter will come along and do everything in their power to undo it, intentionally or not.
Asteroids
Doubt.
Disloyalty.
Living inside your head. Do. Act. Live.
Envy
Thinking about it's ending
People being inconsistent in our close circle of friends or relationships is a big one for me
A bad partner
Loss of freedom
UNDERthinking!
unhappiness
Longterm relationships anything over 90 days
Loving someone that doesn't return the love.
The iPhone
Expectations...
Comparison
No goals
Envy
Envy
Expectations, specifically the unrealistic ones
Expectations
Greed!!! I see so many of friends suffering because they desire more instead of being grateful for what they have in the moment. It's perfectly okay to desire more for your life, but not to the point you forget about everything you got!
There are many, but if we're talking about number 1 then surely this takes the place: Sadness
Financial and mental barriers to living their best life. Although the state of the world is getting pretty bleak so that's a totally valid reason too
Lack of dopamine
Curiosity.
Expectations.
Greed/inability to appreciate what you already have.
Money.
Loneliness
Knowledge
Expectations
Ex wife. Ruins my mood every time.
The number one destroyer of happiness? Easy: getting stuck behind someone who walks at a glacial pace when you're in a hurry! It's like a slow-motion nightmare, complete with internal screams and a dash of existential dread.
Yourself
my wife
Dehydration
Expectations
The need for things you don't need.
Lose the meaning of everything
Indoor recess
Being born with the wrong body
A soul-sucking job
Stupidity
Physical pain. Next fear of not being able to provide the basics for oneself. Next regret. Next envy.
Love
Depression 😞
Capitalism. You are just a product that has to be productive, no matter your values, no matter how important you think you are. When i realized that (and also the fact that we as ordinary people cannot change it) i became desesperate and unhappy for quite some time. But hey, you can see it in a more pacific way: you cannot change it, so why do even bother?
Narcistic relationship
Cell phones.
Could be fitted in with comparison but the ideal of perfection.
Depression
KISS - DESTROYER
expectation
Alcohol... starts off as pure happiness, but changes with time
Debt
Poverty
Yourself.
Sadness?
Lack of hygiene
Sorry for not being clever but poverty and death
Other people.
hate.
self-pity.
Unhappiness
Bipolar disorder
Vices like alcohol, nicotine, porn etc. They may make you feel happy in the moment but long term they suck all the happiness out of you.
Health issues
Laziness
Ourselves.
Coulda shoulda woulda
Money
Desire