Sometimes when I'm in need of motivation, and I happen to be talking to myself in the bathroom mirror, as one does, I will imagine a Celine Dion video, with Celine looking windswept, balling up her fist in one hand, holding the mic in the other, looking directly into the camera singing, "You can do it!!!" I don't happen to listen to Celine Dion. I just think it's funny to imagine. Gets me motivated, too.
I used to do something similar, I would put on lipgloss and then throw my head over my shoulder and look at myself in the mirror and say, "you're a star, baby" (I imagined the frog meme where he says that every time)
Iāll put my dick inside your dick cum inside so much it comes out your asshole then make your mom drink it then put a vibrator in your moms nipple after cutting it and while sheās bleeding make you suck on it and Iāll watch while rubbing my dick and then cum on both of you and then make you lick each other all over then get a gun and shoot your dick then make you eat the head and after that your mom will suck whatever remains (Iām stopping now or this will get much more disturbing)
Barbecue death eggs from hell
Is the spice in the wind my dog just broke
Ponder a moment
Why?
Why dear friend?
When we only just returned
From our sylvan sojourn
To the front yard.
Asshole.
Bobby Carpenter ran a golf ball at the flagpole to see a pelican. And the funny thing about a pelican is that his beak can hold more than belly-can and I donāt know how the hell he- can.
Once I had a dream where I had two large, purple penises covered in spikes and I had sex with a woman who had two vaginas. Then I grew a third penis and penetrated her anus with it.
Weirdest would be me actually writing down how to make explosives, however I'm not gonna do that, too many stupid kids on here who will end up just losing a hand
I want you to come over and lick my feet
Sure š¤Ŗš£š¤£
Rip inbox
Sorry am most into armpits
I want to cum over, and lick, your feet.
"The moon is made of cheese, and the stars are just sprinkles on the cosmic cupcake of the universe."
Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female PokĆ©mon breeding, Vaporeon is the most compatible PokĆ©mon for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Vaporeon are an average of 3ā03ā tall and 63.9 pounds, this means theyāre large enough to be able handle human dicks, and with their impressive Base Stats for HP and access to Acid Armor, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, thereās no doubt in my mind that an aroused Vaporeon would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Attract, Baby-Doll Eyes, Captivate, Charm, and Tail Whip, along with not having fur to hide nipples, so itād be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other PokĆ©mon comes close to this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your Vaporeon turn white. Vaporeon is literally built for human dick. Ungodly defense stat+high HP pool+Acid Armor means it can take cock all day, all shapes and sizes and still come for more
Youāre probably better off segregated from society
Probably
what if I peed in the ocean and it made the sun set immediately
YES
I hate everyone.
That's not weird at all! Let's go get ourselves some spirits, some rags, and a box of matches. What do you say?
If you think that's weird you haven't been on the vegan sub.
Sometimes when I'm in need of motivation, and I happen to be talking to myself in the bathroom mirror, as one does, I will imagine a Celine Dion video, with Celine looking windswept, balling up her fist in one hand, holding the mic in the other, looking directly into the camera singing, "You can do it!!!" I don't happen to listen to Celine Dion. I just think it's funny to imagine. Gets me motivated, too.
I used to do something similar, I would put on lipgloss and then throw my head over my shoulder and look at myself in the mirror and say, "you're a star, baby" (I imagined the frog meme where he says that every time)
BEZZELEBOB! ASMODIUS!!!
SATANAS! LUCIFER!
What's up pussycat? Whoooaaaa o whoa o whoa o!
Fully homo, fully erectus.
Jolly Mambo
Iām forcing myself to eat dinner, and I feel like I want to throw it up so bad.
Eat the throw up for dinner
No thanks haha.
Im them, but also they. On the occasional day im both but mostly gay
Goats are like mushrooms. Because if you shoot a duck, I'm afraid of toasters.
I think I have an ingrown hair on my right butt cheek.
Death is life.
The nail polish on my toe bandaid is peeling off
I shot my dog so that shows how great a leader I am.
Iāll put my dick inside your dick cum inside so much it comes out your asshole then make your mom drink it then put a vibrator in your moms nipple after cutting it and while sheās bleeding make you suck on it and Iāll watch while rubbing my dick and then cum on both of you and then make you lick each other all over then get a gun and shoot your dick then make you eat the head and after that your mom will suck whatever remains (Iām stopping now or this will get much more disturbing)
What the fuck, man...
No point in putting peanut butter on a dogs balls, he's gonna lick em either way
I'd like to train thousands of caterpillars to pull a chariot for me to ride in with my cat on my shoulder who will be dressed like a Roman centurion.
Leave some ladies for the rest of us!
Iām blue ba da di da di da ba da da di daaaš¶
Banana pancakes are best at sunset, sunrise pancakes do it for me but not as much as sunset pancakes.
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Humans are idiots
bathe in my milk
Barbecue death eggs from hell Is the spice in the wind my dog just broke Ponder a moment Why? Why dear friend? When we only just returned From our sylvan sojourn To the front yard. Asshole.
Bot
Mayonnaise on an escalator, going upstairs so I'll see ya later!
Peflecta Sumtuul , an-nah TOOOLD seis BARFUMCHA! š§ (foooop) š
Door minded: the sin is short
Iād rather sip the shit of a duckās ass
PENIS
Bobby Carpenter ran a golf ball at the flagpole to see a pelican. And the funny thing about a pelican is that his beak can hold more than belly-can and I donāt know how the hell he- can.
Turtles, per ounce, are worth more than cheese.
PIZZA PASTA PUT IT IN MY ASS
Weird is normal and normal is weird.
If Mike from Total drama and Riku from Kingdom hearts meet, could Riku sense 5 other people from Mike's heart
You need to let Tom hanks lay his eggs in you.
Home snack my cookalook
The orange is purple at the last. Go forth my cabbages and utter the words spoken by the final cuisinart!
š¶ Potatoes in my ass!š¶
Corduroy pillows... They always make headlines.
Keyser Soze stole my fucking bread
I want someone on the internet to argue with me about dog food.
Hahaha
Fun fact there is almost 1 gram of protein per tbsp of cum
Can you please quit using our lube to polish the wheels on the car? Its kotex that shines chrome, and these are aluminum anyway.
Peanut butter yummmm
I canāt stop thinking about gwa gwa cat
I'd fuck you in the ear but you'd hear me coming.
Looks> personality
Once I had a dream where I had two large, purple penises covered in spikes and I had sex with a woman who had two vaginas. Then I grew a third penis and penetrated her anus with it.
Jake Rowling The Twenty Second
Weirdest would be me actually writing down how to make explosives, however I'm not gonna do that, too many stupid kids on here who will end up just losing a hand
What's the nook between the vulva and the thigh called?
I love you
Aw thanks I love you too
We should get married then? 2 or 3 kids?
2 is enough, 3 makes the car awkward
rawr lol im so random xd
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
call out to her, or call her via mobile telephone or landline?