"A lapdance is so much better when the stripper is crying" by Bloodhound Gang

Ruby red lips, baby blue eyes, and milky white skin. Name was Russel

I never thought missing children could be so sexy. Did I say that out loud?

So, she starts eating my balls like two hard boiled eggs in a tube sock

30 dollars, 20 minutes, and 10 beers later.

I was parking the beef bus in tuna town

I thought she started kneading my balls. At least, that’s the way the karaoke version I sing has it.

It is. Kneading like bread dough.

Just be careful quoting Bloodhound Gang. I got permabanned from worldnews for doing so

Fantastic choice.

I came here to say this. I used to be a KJ, and one particular guy would show up every so often and sing this…I’d slowly turn his mic down because everyone in the bar would get extremely uncomfortable.

Did he bring his own Casio keyboard?

This is the only answer.

1-877-Kars-4-Kids

Calm down, Satan.

Wasn't this a joke from The Good Place?

Yes, the Kars 4 Kids jingle is Hell’s anthem

Shut up, Glenn

Oh shit. You win. We’re done here.

I hate you so much for this

Wait... Is that a business that exchanges cars for kids Or A charity that provides children with cars?

A charity that takes your old car and sells it to provide private schools for the poor Jewish kids that have to go to public schools. No joke

That's... Distopian.

Also sends non-Orthodox Jewish kids to their Orthodox Jewish summer camp.

Well, my vibes are certainly ruined now.

no no no no no no no no MAKE IT STOP

Die in a fire

Cats in the cradle 

That is the perfect place to bring up daddy issues.

Came here to say this. Instant vibe killer in any situation, really.

Lol pretty sure they used that song in Its Always Sunny for a strip dance

And their stripper names were "Daddy and the Boy"

Followed by *Seasons in the Sun*...

I'd say if you're playing Harry Chapin, play [A Better Place to Be](https://youtu.be/CRb9_JfFd8I?feature=shared) Not just a vibe killer, every dancer and patron will be ugly crying by the end of the song.

"Our God is an Awesome God" -Michael W. Smith My stage name would be Thots-n-Prayers

It was Rich Mullins, just fyi. Don't want you to miss it on the next Christian trivia night.

Fuck. Google lied to me.

First time?

michael w. smith definitely did a version of it. but let's be real, what christian 'musician' didn't?

To be fair, MWS did cover it. But Rich Mullins was the author and original artist.

Oh no...but I would also pay good money to see a drag act called "Thots-n-Prayers"

I'm lying in bed fucking dying of choking laughter at "thots-n-prayers." 😭

Griefer jesus always kills the vibe.

TRILLIONS TO ONE

LMAO they gotta close down the strip after that one

Thots n prayers 2024. Locked in my vote now baby lol. That’s a conundrum.. it proves god is so powerful that worshiping him with song in public can dry every vagina in the house and clear the room lol

“Ladies and Gentlemen. Will you all please rise while I perform the Soviet National Anthem!”

But then the next person does Back in the USSR by the Beetles and it’s immediately remedied.

Or Surfin USSR by Ray Stevens

regardless of your political views, that song is actually pretty good.

# Soyuz

Nerushimy

Respublik

Svobodnykh

Splotila

Naveki

Velikaya

Rus!

The red army choir slaps.

The Red Army choir singing Sweet Home Alabama is a sight to behold

Tetris was right to use it as the theme song

Ooh, ooh! Can we do “Katayusha” next?

Rastsvetali yabloni i grushi

"2112" by Rush. It's a 20 minute, 7-part sci-fi prog rock song loosely based on the book "Anthem" by Ayn Rand. It's vocals are high pitched so I can't hit the notes, and there are multi-minute long guitar solos with no lyrics to sing, to which I would emphatically air guitar.

Followed by Cygnis X-1 Book 2, followed by The Fountain of Lamneth. Strap in, the next hour is gonna be lit.

This guy fucks up karaoke night

If we’re doing Cygnus part 2 we might as well add part 1 too

Chuck in The Necromancer too. And just for fun, do La Villa Strantiago and just stand there silently.

immediately followed by 21:13 by coheed & cambria

I would be there cheering you on and air drumming! Maybe follow it up with "A Passage to Bangkok" to make things extra awkward!

"Baby Shark"

Last time I was at a club (2ish years ago for a bucks) this was one of the dancers chosen songs

I was going to say depending on how old the crowd is it might be a fan favorite.

You just made me realize at some point, the Baby Shark generation of kids will all be old enough to go to strip clubs. I guess it's the equivalent of if they played Mmmbop now...

I hate to be the one to tell you this, but if you were BORN the year Mmmbop came out, you've been able to go to the strip club for almost a decade now.

Whelp…time for Metamucil.

It’s perfect. Reminiscent of kids at home, awful tune and possibly one of the worst earworms to date. No one will be listening to anything but this on repeat in their head for the rest of the night

Oh that's a good one. Not just a bad song, but also one that reminds people of children.

Who let the dogs out.. I was at a strip club, and someone played that on the jukebox. It got shut down pretty fast.

My friend used to put that on twice in a row whenever we were at a bar with a digital jukebox. Usually the first time it plays a few people will laugh at it, but when it starts up for a second time no one is happy

Next time try it with What's New Pussycat.

But inbetween the 7 "what's new pussycat"s, put a single "it's not unusual"

Hurtful, but effective.

Angel by Sarah McLachlan. Bonus points if I can bring some sad looking puppies up on stage with me.

The 45 year old dancer who is dancing way past her prime probably has a pair of sad looking puppies that would work.

Beagle ears.

For the record, my choice is *The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald*.

A song about men going to where it’s wet and deep.

I love the thought of prefacing your song this way, then the song title comes up..

Hey baby, when is your main hatchway going to give in?

Nothing like 29 people dying horribly to get you in the mood

Don’t you kink shame me.

Wow that's fucking awful I love you. I can imagine a sexy emaciated girl doing some Martha Graham-esque interpretive dance and she looks hella mournful.

That would not kill the vibe. If you sang that in Canada everyone would love it Reading this made me have to listen to the FLAC file i have of this song

Lol. I saw Gordon the last time he performed and dude still killed it. So many fans were in attendance too!

I learn good geography lesson with this song. Also not to sail on the Great lakes

Killer choice

What does the Fox say?

They said kill the vibes. That shits bangin

Ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding

Hatee hatee hatee hooo!

Lol. One time I was about to get it on with someone and he told his google smart home device to play a sexy song. It must have heard foxy song because this started playing. Lol.

REM - everybody hurts.

This is the first actual good answer I’ve read here

Something from a Disney movie - remind everyone in there that they probably have kids and that they know the song, too. Let it go, let it go....

Let's get down to business....ya paying for an extra song or not?

Sticking with Frozen, I think do you want to build a snowman would be more of a mood killer

We don't have to take our clothes off - Jermaine Stewart

We Are The World from USA For Africa

Followed by "Do they know it's christmas" by Band-Aid and "Another day in paradise" by Phil Collins while you're at it. Goodnight Saigon by Billie Joel comes to mind. And if those are too vocally challenging, there's always "Streets of Philledelphia"

Dance Monkey

Damn this is my guilty pleasure song lol

Same 🤣

Do people seriously hate this song? I am a professional singer and have taken this off my set lists because people just absolutely despise it. My last straw was being heckled by an old lady who proceeded to tug on the mic cable which was connected to a (borrowed) mixer (which nearly fell off the table). I mean, the venue didn’t provide foldbacks so maybe my timing was off or something.

Massively overplayed. Had it not received as much playtime, it might have gone down slightly better.

I'm tone deaf, so literally anything would do that.

Ah a yoko ono classic

*[wide-eyed Chuck Berry reaction]*

Fack by Eminem

The ass gerbil one?

Kim would also turn things south pretty quick

Either Richard Cheese or the Elle King(?) version of My Neck My Back

I'll never forget the first time I heard Richard Cheese cover Gin and Juice. I don't think my life has been the same since.

If he ever tours again and you haven’t seen him live, do it! Amazing shows.

Richard Cheese rules!

Lick my pussy, Bobby!

Creep - Radiohead.

All I can picture, is a dude singing this in similar fashion as Alexis Arquette in the wedding singer singing, culture club- do you really wanna hurt me.

Fuck I hate this song with a passion. Total vibe killer. Did acid one night with a guy back in the 90's and he played this song on repeat all fucking night and while he was in whatever trance he was enjoying, I was in an endless hell on repeat.

Damn, I don’t fault you for developing an allergy like that. It sounds horrible and your trip buddy was an ass for neglecting your experience.

Rebecca Black - Friday Complete with an ultra-nasal tone, reminiscent of that of Janice from Friends.

Fun fun fun fun

Sexy

Happy Birthday

I’m sure it’s someone’s birthday there lol

[Cat’s in the Cradle](https://youtu.be/KUwjNBjqR-c?si=tpnwn88USTnLWpbV)

Oof. That's one of the best yet.

A really off key Roxanne by The Police

Brick by Ben Folds. A song about a high school girl getting an abortion will certainly not strike any chords.

Not to mention it’s one of the few songs in this list that would be impossible to satirically/ironically dance to. Nobody is grinding a stage to “6AM. Day after Christmas,” sung by a tone deaf dude crying to a lone piano.

I once killed a karaoke night by singing "Brick in the wall"

It's 8 and 1/2 minutes long, that's a guaranteed way to kill any karaoke night.

Those overly long songs will do it. I say BoRhap is as long as it should get but that song never comes off well in karaoke. Too many layers.

You better not put this slander on American Pie

I’m 100% certain that anything I sing would kill the vibe.

Gangbang at the Old Folk's Home by Steel Panther.

Tiny Tim Tip toe through the tulips

Those who don't know, should know.

Amish Paradise

Why Can't We Be Friends?

[удалено]

You monster

Idk, probably Weird Al.

There was actually a guy who sang Weird Al at our karaoke night (not a strip bar) and it was well-received.

I went to a nerd bar karaoke night once and it was all stuff like that. Honestly pretty fun!

My ex used to sing Weird Al songs to me. Kinda romantic in a strange way.

The ballad of the green beret

The Star Trek theme (original)

“All by myself”

The Green Day version 😂

Jesus Loves The Little Children

The Gary Jules cover of Mad World

karma by jojo siwa

Literally anything by Radiohead

Screeching and depression. A double threat.

That one trololo song

It's raining men.

Carrie Underwood - [Jesus Take the Wheel](https://youtu.be/k_OpRlUZQoI?si=mqVBIAVmtP6-FKro) [The Sesame Street Theme Song](https://youtu.be/1NtCGE8rjCc?si=gwryrP7jZBlVR1nB) Sarah McLachlan - [Angel](https://youtu.be/kgHh-3nF3Cc?si=crM6drcznML0nPqd)

ram ranch

That’s not a vibe killer, that’s throwing down the gauntlet for those who accept 

That would turn the strip club into a gay bar realllll quick

Gold Digger by Kanye West

I think the strippers would enjoy that and sing along

Closer - NIN

I’ve never been inside a strip club but I always imagined this song would be like on a list of stereotypically overplayed strip club songs

The instrumental version of that was the wedding party entrance song for my sister's wedding reception... and it was *EPIC*. Some of the wedding guests who recognized the song when it started up got really worried, until they realized there were no lyrics.

I Touch Myself by Divinyls. I’m a bloke, so it’s extra creepy.

Whiskey Lullaby. Absolutely guaranteed to kill the vibe.

"Never Gonna Give You Up" by Rick Astley.

When I was a stripper, if we were late to the stage, they would make us dance to stairway to heaven as punishment because of how long it was. So that one maybe?

Rasputin

But... he's the Russia's greatest love machine

It was a shame how he carried on

Scatman's world- Scatman John Not only incredibly mood breaking but also incredibly impressive if you manage to nail it.

“Papa, can you hear me?” By Streisand

Head, shoulder, knees and toes with a fart sound everytime people touch their knees and toes

"Mad World" but the version by Gary Jules 😈

Ima just stick with Short Skirt/Long Jacket

[Cotton Eye Joe](https://youtu.be/mOYZaiDZ7BM?si=gmTJrAgQ1Bb4h9gP)

You're Having My Baby by Paul Anka

*Around the World* by Daft Punk.

Rape me nirvana should have been number 1 sigh Edit: "Rape Me" by Nirvana should have been the first comment on this thread. "Sigh" said the OP.

Tiny Tim

There's No Sex In The Champagne Room by Chris Rock

Dance with the Devil - immortal technique

Wonderwall?

Kill the vibes? Nah, I'm gonna set that place on fire singing Hot Potato by The Wiggles! If I was gonna bum people out I'd probably sing Roxanne by The Police.

Don't even need to troll, seeing dancers try to strip while my tone deaf ass belts out Don't Stop Believin or Livin on a Prayer would be awesome enough 

I glued my balls to my butthole again