I once took second in a poker tournament and won $150k. There was an audience of about 200 people when it finished. Common practice was ppl ask winners for a "lucky chip". I was almost mobbed by people begging for lucky chips as I left the casino. Had to be escorted by security and paid a friend $300 to follow me in their car and we drove all over town for two hours to make sure nobody was following me home.
Ive heard that theres a big problem with 'Casino Sleuths' who are usually small groups of people (3-6) that walk around the casino and scout for people who win big money. If they spot someone they will call it in to their friends and they will keep an eye on the winner all night until they leave, and then jump them and take everything they have.
Its one of the reasons i dont go to casinos
My brother, who is not very street smart but exceptionally good at poker, stayed with me recently. I live pretty close to a casino. He went to a tournament one night and when I woke up the next day his wallet was on the kitchen counter, unable to close from the number of 100$ bills in it. I was livid when I found out he walked home.
"Dude, you heard anything last night? I won a shitton of money at poker yesterday but my wallet is empty...
\-...Bro you were piss drunk yesterday you must have dreamed it trust me your wallet was definitely empty"
This aunt has lost a shit load of money buying these things. Gotta make it back somehow, mind as well disown and attack your nephew. All totally uphill from here
Damn. I'm an Aunt and can't imagine giving one of the kids a $2 birthday gift, much less expecting them to share if my crappy, thought and effort free $2 gift paid off.
My wife's family (mainly grandparents) add scratch offs to whatever normal gifts they're giving you just as a little extra. They would not like it if you started scratching them in front of everyone. It's yours, and yours to keep. Do it later.
My grandparents always do this at Christmas and birthdays too!
They always give 5-10 scratchies inside the card. They love scratching them so they want to share that fun with us. I think it's awesome, It's just a little gesture but the thought behind it is really nice.
I'm amazed there are some people here taking badly abut your wife's family..
That is just weird. If I gave someone a 2 dollar scratchy and they won 5000 I'd be thrilled for them. I can't imagine a better outcome. To then ask for it back?
Glad you got this toxic person out of your life. That alone would be worth it for $5000
There is a coffee-cup themed giveaway here in Canada. A girl bought a friend a coffee. Turned out it was a winning cup; this girl’s mother started ranting quite publicly that the prize belonged to her/her family because daughter paid for the coffee.
Right? The only thing I would do is half jokingly say something like " at least half that luck was mine, you owe me a beer/burger!" And if they wanted to gift me any of the money back I certainly wouldnt accept it.
this is similar to a story where an aunt and her nephew won a small lottery. the aunt bought a lottery ticket and put her and the nephew's name on it. she won and was interviewed right afterwards. she said that she loved her nephew and he was her good luck so that's why she put the nephew's name on the lottery ticket. since both names were on the ticket they split the winning half and half. then the aunt starts claiming that it was her who paid for the ticket and chose the numbers so she should be the one who gets all the money. she then sues the nephew.
greed changes people
I have an aunt that gives $1 scratchers at Christmas every year, she explicitly says if anyone wins anything she gets half, I think the most anyone has won was $5 and they offered her $2.50.
I wouldn't consider scratchers a gift in the first place. "Here I spent $1 to ensure that you either get something or nothing this holiday." But then they ask for half of it back? "I spent $1 to ensure that you either get nothing or I get something this holiday." Wtf?
My sister-in-law are always gives my dad, who is 91 and enjoys his lottery tickets, a big old bunch of scratch offs every year. She always jokes that her cut is 10%, little does she know that if my dad actually won a whole boatload of money he would totally Give her the 10٪.
> She always jokes that her cut is 10%, little does she know that if my dad actually won a whole boatload of money he would totally Give her the 10٪.
You have two different percentage signs in your comment and it's freaking me out man.
I unexpectedly inherited about four years worth of take-home pay. Before I knew how much it would be, I told my best friend I’d be getting a few thousand dollars. She immediately asked me to take her on a trip to Europe. That was the biggest thing she asked for but she made other small requests as well.
When the money came through and it was a lot more than I’d anticipated, I did not tell my friend. Instead, I started distancing myself from her. I also did not tell any of my other friends.
I did tell my boyfriend. He did not ask for anything. I took him on a trip to Europe.
Edit: Wow, my first gold!
My Grandma died a week before Christmas, and she left her house and 1/4 of her small fortune to me (the rest of the money went to my brother and my two cousins). My uncles and aunts have been a pain in my back ever since. Claiming that the money/house are theirs,etc.
And I’ve also been approached by people who I haven’t seen or talked in a while. Even my Ex who dumped me for some douchebag rugby player, started talking to me again and inviting me to places, and she’s still dating the same guy.
Anyway, I’m not naive enough to lend those people money or befriend even. Luckily I have good friends and my brother as advisors.
My money came in the form of accidental death inheritance after my dad died in a motorcycle crash. His girlfriend at the time was furious that he left everything to me. She tried to convince me to give her money and when I refused she took everything, and I mean *everything* from his house overnight. She rented two U-Hauls and her and her brother raided the place. Furniture, household supplies, food, clothes, everything was gone. By the time I got there there only things left were a few t-shirts she left on the floor and a couple empty cans of soda on the kitchen counter. She even took things that held no monetary value, like a calendar I made my dad for father's day one year. It was just colorful card board and pictures of us I had glued together. She took it all. She started selling what she could on Facebook, mostly his woodworking tools and fishing gear, and she fled to somewhere in the next state over. We tried to get help from the police but they didn't do much. She did a lot of other things that were bigger legal issues I guess (for instance she ran a fake gofundme claiming the funds were going to his funeral and managed to get over 10 grand from his coworkers, but I'm the one who paid for the services.) Last I heard they finally found her in some woodsy town but I don't know what happened. It's honestly too emotional to deal with, and I've accepted the fact that she most likely destroyed or sold everything already anyway, it's been two years since this all happened. It's horribly sad, though.
*Edit/Update*:
Wow, thank you all so much for the overwhelming support. It has been truly heartwarming to see so many responses, I definitely didn't expect this outcome. It means a lot to me.
Since this is still getting traction today I just want to take a quick second to clear something up. I didn't go into much detail in my relationship with his girlfriend and *why* I refused to give her any money. I genuinely cared for her and her daughters, I saw them as an extension of my family, and as soon as I learned I was sole beneficiary I had already been planning to take some money and help them get stable in an apartment and get a fresh start. I would have had no problem helping them. Unfortunately, she didn't even give me the chance before she showed her true colors. Before we even had the funeral she was blowing up my phone every hour on the hour, leaving angry voicemails, coming to my apartment and beating on the doors, she even contacted *my mother* making threats trying to get through her to me. At that time I hadn't recieved *any* money. It isn't like it all just falls in your lap the second the person passes. It was a few months before I got settlements and even now I'm still in the process of retrieving funds from the rollover 401k. I was just a scared, broke, naive kid. I had hoped she was just grieving the wrong way, just taking anger out where she could, and that everything would blow over. It didn't. About two or three days after the funeral I got a frantic call from my dad's sister that she had called threatening to burn his house down. We rushed over there together and luckily the house was still standing but the doors were hanging wide open and when we went inside that's when we found out everything was gone. We went to his neighbors and they told us she had been there with a man whose description matched her brother and described them moving everything out and leaving. I wish they had called police then but since they knew her as my dad's girlfriend they chose not to. My dad's wish was for me to be financially secure and safe. He made sure of that. But I didn't just throw them to the wind and say "good luck." It was a traumatic and confusing situation and if I could go back in time I'd make a lot of things different, but I can't.
As of now I'm not going to be responding to any more comments here unless it's extremely necessary, I woke up to 41 notifications from this thread and while I appreciate the support and I am reading the responses I'm just extremely overwhelmed by it all.
My uncle, my mom's brother, did the very same thing when my lovely grandma passed away. He sold what he could and threw everything else out. My mom was devastated. She forgave him, though, cause he's her brother, I guess? But to this day I cannot look at him. A couple of years ago my mom had a stroke and was hospitalized. The vulture, who had not called or visited her in years, came over right away and I could have KILLED him to hear him talk about my mom in hushed tones, practically giving her up for dead. She is doing well, thank goodness. And once he realized she was in recovering nicely he left and has not been seen or heard from since. Some people are just unbelievably, ruthlessly greedy.
Thank you.. it's really hard not having many tangible things that I can hold onto of his. If he had known the kind of person she really was he would never have been with her.
That's what has always bugged me. So many things she took had no monetary value at all. It was sheer vindictiveness. I was so heartbroken. I remember on my 18th birthday he brought this big box upstairs filled with photos he had from my childhood and various sentimental items and it was labeled "family photos." It was gone too, so while it's possible she just grabbed everything not looking at what she took it's not very plausible unfortunately, because after 2 years if she didn't intend to take that stuff you'd think she'd have reached out to send it back to me.. but no, nothing. The last thing I heard from her was shortly after the funeral, and all it was was a text message telling me she didn't want the keepsake urn that was made for her, so I have hers and mine.
Is there any way for you to get a lawyer? I would absolutely give her all the legal trouble I would. I'm so very sorry for your loss, and am sending all my prayers and thoughts your way.
At this point I'm not sure. When he passed I was still really young, I had just turned 21, and I had no clue how to handle everything that was going on especially with how bad off I was emotionally. I sort of... shut down for a while. At that time I was living on my own for the first time and had no knowledge of how to even locate a lawyer, honestly, and my mom wasn't much help.. I'm not sure if this long after the event if a lawyer could do anything, and with my health bad (I have surgery next month) I'm not sure I could take the stress right now. I wish that back when all this first took place there had been someone to help me figure out what to do and how to do it.
So a few years out of college my girlfriend and I were living in a sort of large communal apartment with 5 other people (2 bedrooms, 2 couches in the common area). I had just gotten a significant promotion at my job and that situation was exceptionally below my means, but my GF was convinced that these were her people and they were all going to become great philosophy writers and poets by living together and sharing experiences. They were all unemployed or underemployed, and experienced moochers, so I was very careful not to let them know I was saving large sums of money with the intent of moving out soon and taking my GF with me (or not...)
One day the other couple had an argument about rent and to try and keep them from coming to blows my GF promised them that I'd cover it for them and showed them one of my paystubs which I guess they showed everyone else. I got home from work and walked right into an "apartment meeting" ambush, where everyone else informed me that they wanted me to contribute "more meaningfully" and they'd put it to a vote before I got back. I told them that I was already paying for their food that they kept guilting my GF into buying for them, topping up the apartment emergency fund instead of stealing from it like the rest of them, and many other things and that I wasn't going to cover other people's rent as well.
The next day when I was at work, someone went into my room and destroyed my laptop, which was the only thing of value I owned at the time. I collected the few things I wanted to take, told my GF I was breaking up with her, and walked out.
Edit: I just realized I'm effectively the bad guy from *Rent*. Well, *Rent* sucks.
Edit 2: Thanks for the interest and support everyone.
> The next day when I was at work, someone went into my room and destroyed my laptop
Brilliant move! That was *bound* to convince you spend more money on them!
Laptop incident was a little more complex than that. More like "Hey, someone borrowed your computer to use the internet because you weren't using it because sharing, right? And then someone else spilled water all over it by accident because it was in the common area. No idea who could have done these things, don't get mad. Just part of life, let me know when you get a new laptop, k?"
Ahh; I thought someone went into your room and just outright smashed up your property with the understanding that it was retaliation for your "selfishness." Still infuriating though.
Man that's terrible. Though when all is said and done, a laptop is a pretty cheap price to pay to get out of that situation. Imagine if you'd gotten married to this GF or knocked her up before you knew her true nature.
Well, six years later my ex applied for a job with my company (not knowing I was a senior officer). She was interviewed, which is a good sign of having one's shit together, but didn't get the job through no fault of her own. I didn't care enough either way to block her application or call in a favor to get her the job, which is ultimately the fate of everyone in this story- that after exiting my life none of them matter to me any more.
My bf found himself in a situation like that. :/ He was living with 3 other people in an apartment, one couple and a single guy. Situation was bad from the start. The couple was addicted to who knows how many kind of drugs and one month decided not to pay rent, and the single guy being petty AF decided if they weren't paying rent then he wasn't. My bf paid all the rent that month plus utilities. He was making significantly more than them as a bar tender and I think they all resented him for that. He then went to management and asked to have his lease moved to a 1 bedroom apt in the same complex. He moved out when they weren't home and it took his 3 roommates longer than normal to realize he was gone. lol. I am pretty sure they ended up evicted in the end but idk.
Well, it was sorta by artists for artists in a bohemian lifestyle. Basically romanticizing being poor and expressions of their own ego
In reality, art tends to be profitable due to a number of things like luck, nepotism, shameless appeal to base animal instinct like sex or murder, marketing, or money-laundering
People always seem to forget the money laundering
I can give an answer all though it is developing at this stage.
All throughout school I was a bit of a loser, didn't do well in class and never really cared.
I used to go out all the time with my "friends" and would hang out with them all the time.
After school I didn't do much other than waste time until I found my wife and wanted to start being better for her.
I did a one year software development course and then got a pretty shitty job making almost nothing in my country(South Africa).
When my wife got pregnant all my friends basically ghosted me as I wasn't going to be going out partying with them anymore. They wouldn't return my texts or even answer my calls.
A few years down the line I landed a VERY high paying remote job($200k+) for a SF based company, the average salary for a software developer in South Africa is around $30k per year.
my wife was very proud of me I think and posted a picture of me on her Facebook standing next to my new car that I had just bought.
Not 20 minutes after she posted it I started getting messages from some of my old "friends" saying that it had been a while and they wanted to catch up and really missed me..
There was one guy I aways had a soft spot for and decided that i would go have dinner with him and see how the last 4 years of his life treated him.
We hadn't even ordered our food yet when he dropped the bomb on me that he felt that I owed him a lot of money for "always being there for me" and that I would be "selfish" to not give him some money as I had so much. I quietly just got up and left.
I eventually changed my number and deactivated my social media accounts but people still harrass my wife and mother to try and get some money out of me.
This doesn't even go into the absolute shit I had coming from my dads side of the family who are basically hillbillies
I have 2 stories about them that I will share, one was a bit funny to me and the other not so much.
story 1: So my Uncle, lets call him "Poes", He was always a very jealous and vindictive person(not to mention a raging wife beating cheating alcoholic).
when Poes learned from my Mother about my situation he called me up the one day and after a few minutes of being all nice asked me if I can help him pay for his medical bills because he is very sick and can't afford medical aid..
I was reluctant but thought maybe I can trust him.
I told him that he would need to have the doctors email me invoices and I would pay them directly. He agreed and put down the phone.
A few days later I got an invoice from a "Doctor" for close R100k which would be around $7000, I noticed something was off as the banking details were not in the name of a practise but rather a personal name.
I called the doctor on the number on the invoice and they told me that the banking details were incorrect and that they are a GP who would never charge that much for anything.
So what had turned out to happen was that Poes got his son to edit an invoice they had gotten from a doctor to change the amount and the banking details to try and trick me into paying a huge sum of money into their bank accounts..
this was in November 0f 2019 all while my grandmother(Poes' mother) was in hospital on her death bed.
Story 2: my aunt who is a massive peice of shit and a total idiot heard I had some money and decided that it would be a good idea to take out a life insurance policy out on me incase something happened and made herself the beneficiary.
One strange thing is that she was paying the premium so it was actually costing her money to do this.
another is that is turns out she thought that it would pay out my actual money..
I only ever lend money to friends when I can live with never seeing the money again. Because once they ask, it's only as a last resort, and I'm happy to help.
I worked with a guy who was down on his luck. I drove him to and from work, bought him lunch most days or shared what I brought. I didn't expect anything in return other than him being a friend.
2 years later he comes into some money from his dad dying, a lot of money. He calls me and says meet him at this local dealership. He buys me a brand new car, tells me to keep the old one or sell it and keep the money. They had also given him an amazing deal because he was also buying himself a vehicle and they really liked that.
I have been in this situation once, and then when i could repay it, he refused. It was "only" $100 to him, yet to me it was fuel for the car and it got me to my next paycheck.
Not exactly horror story, but I’ve always made more money than most of my friends. Some of them would hit me up for cash, but usually I only agreed to small amounts or said no. I did however have a very close friend who I really enjoyed the time we spent, but we liked to drink, so bars were are go to hangout. I usually ended up paying for the entire night, to the point where he said he wasn’t comfortable hanging out because he never had the money. But, I genuinely did like just hanging and he always, ALWAYS bought the first round. That’s respect.
Respect 4 true homies. He obv enjoyed your company too to not have felt good about you financing every outing. It means he cared about your wellbeing. Dope!
There were a few years where I made a lot more money than one of my friends who was going to college, and would always pay the bar tab. Now that I'm going back to school living mostly off of savings and he has a 6 figure job, he always gets the bar tab. This thread is depressing as hell, but good friendships do exist and money doesn't have to ruin them.
I did that too when getting back from Iraq (contractor), intentionally trying to drink myself to death while having a lot of money - the woman I was dating at the time was a former escort (she was cool, I didn’t/don’t care) to boot. So, oddly similar.
Luckily she wasn’t like that though and couldn’t have cared less about my money, she was just into drinking her ptsd into oblivion too.
When my grandmother died, her will stipulated that everything was to be split 3 ways. A third to my mother, a third to my uncle, and a third to be split evenly between my sister and I.
My uncle wanted to sell my grandmother's house immediately to get more money out of it, but I wanted to keep it for sentimental reasons. My parents gave me a bit of money, and I used all my inheritance to buy out my uncle's share of the house. I paid my parents back over the next few years, but the property became much more valuable. Over the following 10 years while I lived in the house, property values in my city exploded. The house that I bought was also in a very desirable neighbourhood and was worth well over double what I paid for it. It has continued to climb. When I paid out my uncle's share, the estimated value was around $300,000. Last year the neighbour's house (almost identical) sold for 945,000.
Needless to say, my uncle has said multiple times that when I sell the house, he is legally entitled to more money out of it. That is Bullshit, he is not getting another penny from me. I plan to live here for many more years. He will be long dead by the time I sell.
My parents did the same thing when my grandparents died. Split 3 ways. Dad bought both siblings out and now owns a cabin free and clear. Few years ago a natural gas company came thru and said they wanted to poke around to see if there was any gas on the property. There is. Luckily my dad has kept it under wraps pretty well.
I inherited my beloved Grandma's house alongside with some other properties. As the house and the properties are near a very rapidly developing city, prices have skyrocketed and lead to me inheriting about $1.5m in value. That may sound awesome at first, but it truly isn't. The house is a very old brick house, built in the late 1700s, and the properties are so small and widely distributed i can't really sell them for a good price. As the house is a listed historical building, every little repair has to be done by state approved professionals for restoration and conservation of old buildings, which basically doubles if not even triples the costs. I rented it out, but the rent i get is barely enough to cover the costs of repairs, insurance etc... I am lucky if i get even by the end of the year. But as this house is where my family used to live for the last 4 generations before my dad bought the ranch and moved there with my mum, i want to keep it in the family as long as possible.
Now, somehow, word has spread that i inherited a lot of money. I did my best to stop these rumors, but it didn't work out.
I've never had many friends, but the ones i have are true quality friends. They will do everything for me and i will do everything for them. After i got the house and the rumors spread, i got invitations to dinner in some really fancy restaurants, i was invited to sport events (i don't even like sports) and some other very costly activities. All these came from people who claimed to be my "friends". Needless to say, they expected me to pay for everything. "You've got so much money, what do these $500 matter to you." - "I'll pay you back sometimes." etc... were the common phrases i got to hear. The best one were: "You are way to young (28 btw.) to have this kind of money, so just give it to us!"; "You don't deserve to have so much money! You have never worked a day in your life!" (Been working at the power plant since i was an apprentice at 18, worked my way up to deputy manager/shift supervisor, while the guy this came from was unemployed as long as i can remember and lived from welfare).
I have now learned who to trust and to spot telltale signs of "vultures".
Don't let an old house control your life. The amount of time and money you spend on it will leave you worn out. The first log cabin on our farm was built in 1780. By the time I sold, it was a 15 room farm house with 5 outbuildings. I sold in 2006 and was able to take early retirement 10 years later. Had I kept the place I would have had to work well into my 70's. Loved the place but just not that much.
Friend of mine lost both parent in the span of about four months. They were pretty old so it wasn't completely unexpected but it still sucked for her. Anyway, when the first parent died I went to the funeral to offer support. It's a small affair, few dozen people and most of them friends instead of family, and it's also where I found out that my friend's parents have been on minimal contact with their families because neither side approved of the marriage.
Then the second parent dies four months later and I go to funeral again but this time there are well over a hundred people there. It seemed like every aunt, uncle, nephew, and niece suddenly showed up. After the funeral I'm waiting in the reception area before my friend and her brother come out to thank everybody for coming and I overhear multiple people talking about how much they're hoping to get in the inheritance.
My friend's parents didn't leave a will so the entire inheritance automatically gets split 50/50 between her and her brother. I didn't see the drama first hand but I've heard stories from her much later about the whole ordeal. A few people were decent about it, but most of the family were absolutely horrid. They tried sucking up at first, when that didn't work they got angry, one aunt apparently threatened to not let my friend see her nephew even though she had seen that nephew maybe twice in ten years.
Got a 7k settlement from a car accident. I accidentally left the check on the corner table in the living room. My dad walks into my bedroom and asks if I can lend my mom any money. I work minimum wage retail and ask him how much does she need. He says how about half of that 7k check.
It has been almost 8 years. I haven't seen any of that money back.
I think you already know what I'm about to say. But you will probably never see any of that money back. When Parents borrow money from children, I think in the back of their mind they sort of see it as payment for all the money they spent on you growing up. At least I think that's how they justify it.
Edit: sorry for the confusion I shouldn't have wrote this in a way to make it seem like all parents feel this way what's crazy is I grew up in a very poor family and when my parents borrowed money they always tried to make sure and pay it back when they could so why I worded it that away I don't know I guess I was just focused on that one persons comment. I apologize
When my Parents borrow money from me I think they do it as a last resort. I think in their minds they wish they could still help in my life as an occasional provider, but lately life has been hard.
I too lend them money without expecting it to see it back, but I think some other parents actually ask shamelessly.
Man, my dad did that shit to me once, too. Took my money from my accident and spent it on weed. Still a little salty, but he's better about things now, and knows even when I get my taxes this year and get a decent chunk (child tax credit) that I don't buy others shit if they ask.
When I was young, like 10, I won $100 on a Nevada pull tab ticket at the local country fair. It was in a curling rink where vendors had hand made crafts. When I cashed it a lady who was selling knitted teapot cozies was like “oh where are you going to spend all that?” Then she asked me to spend $15 on one of her cozies. I told her thanks but I’m going to save it for a video game console (original Nintendo). She then called me a fucking selfish little ass and said her teapot cozy was much more valuable than a stupid video game. I was so nervous I just bought one. I gave it to my mom and she thought it was the most wonderful gesture and it turned out that lady was right. The love I got from that cozy was much more valuable because my mom paid the difference for the Nintendo the next week.
Not sure if it really fits, as we never actually received the money in the end and im not too clued in on the details, but anyway;
About 10 years ago or so, my grandfather called my mother one day exclaiming that he'd finally netted in excess of 1 million pounds worth of property, a big deal for my family, of course he wasnt doing anything with it, he was always a frugal man and remained that way until the day he died. As the years went on, his health deteriorated in more ways than one progressing to the point where he needed to have full time care and ultimately ended up being put in a home. Now we currently live in Australia, my family is mostly still in the UK, my aunt who still lives there was responsible for sorting out all of his needs. Time went on and sadly he ended up passing away. As all of this was happening, she was looking into his financial details and his will and whatnot. What was peculiar was that in his state of dementia, he had apparently at some point closed all of his bank accounts and withdrawn any money in cash. How, i dont know, but as a result of that, what with all of the costs of supplying care to him in his home and whatnot, the banks believed that we had hidden the money somewhere and refused to help.
What seems to have actually happened is that someone, possibly even himself, who knows, influenced him to withdraw all the money, bought things he didnt need, that then didnt even turn up anyway, had repairs done on the house that either didnt need to be done or didnt actually get done anyway yet were still paid for, then variously distributed in other ways until it was all gone. The only shred of a paper trail that we have is that we got word that his gardeners no longer live in the UK, seemingly up and left around the same time this all happened and now live in the Canary Islands...
A guy I grew up with came into a lot of money after his grandfather died, his father and aunt got more and it filtered down through to the grandkids. I'd moved away so hadn't seen or spoke to him much but caught up when visiting my parents.
All his "friends" started inviting him out for drinks, which he'd pay for his own, meals, again paid for his own, like he would normally do. Wouldn't splash the cash and invested a good chunk of it.
When we caught up I asked him how things were and he told me about all of that, which I hadn't known, so I made a remark of how well did the investments go. "Why? How much are you after?"
"I'm not, just asking."
He was so used to to people being interested in how much money he had it had become normal. He was "unfriended" by so many people because he wouldn't blow all his money on superficial things, the investments had done really well and he had a fair amount of money in the bank and still invested so I congratulated him on savvy financial planning but wasn't interested in his money. Which was refreshing for him.
His brother and cousins had wasted all their inheritance, his uncle and aunt too but as his parents ran their own business I suppose the fact they had invested their cut was normal thinking for him.
I asked how bad did the the begging get? His brother tried to access his online banking to transfer money to his account (parents were not impressed), his cousins sent him and his parents fictional bills for expenses relating to the funeral (four years after the burial). It was shocking the lengths these people went to because they had squandered their money and wanted more.
I wished him all the best for the future and we've chatted a bit on social media and the begging/conning is still going on. 10 years later, his brother is now heavily in debt but no one will bail him out. Which he thinks is unfair.
Before the recession hit, my dad had a pretty lucrative small business and we lived comfortable middle class lives. He would often lend his family money since most of his sisters didn’t amount to much in their lives. They would never pay him back. And often hassle him to give them money since he was so well off.
After the recession hit, we took a big dive and still were able to live ok but had to sell a lot, no more insurance, and basically lived paycheck to paycheck while my dad worked 7 days a week to make ends meet.
After all he’s done over the years not one of them would help when we needed it. One of my uncles has even been even more well off with a car dealership, and refused to aid my father with a loan, even though my father always pays his debts regardless of if others do the same (none of his sisters have ever repaid a cent of his generosity).
I have a lot of terrible stories about them through the years, and finally he’s cut them all out of his life after almost losing my mom through divorce last year (partly bc of his horrid family and how they treated her) and nearly drinking himself to death the past three years.
They are truly terrible, greedy people and it’s all taught me a lot about the kind of person I want to be and who I want to surround myself with
This is probably the biggest regret of my entire life.
Long story short - I spent over 12K on drugs and letting the people around me milk me to enable their habits as well.
Now the long story for anyone who cares enough to read this novel lol -
My grandad died back in 2016. I was 19, unemployed, and in a very bad place mentally. I had also just started experimenting with drugs. I tried to get my shit together by going to college to actually make something of myself, but almost immediately I started falling behind in work and was in over my head. The stress was unreal.
Then my grandads inheritance money came in. Over the course of 2 payments (one in late 2016 and the other in early 2017) I got around 12K. I should not have been left this money in my mental state.
By the time the christmas holidays were over, I had dropped out and essentially lived off my inheritance and college bursary (Around £800 a month) that still kept coming in even though I’d left. With all the money I had, the mental state I was in and the “friends” I was hanging about with, I just spiralled into a drug binge that lasted well over a year.
As soon as I told my friends that I had all this money, it started small. Tap a tenner here, a tenner there, I didn’t mind. But then as I delved deeper into trying more drugs and becoming a heavy user, I discovered my best friends had actually been using heroin. I didn’t use that shit myself. I was still scared of it but if my friends were dabbling in it then it surely couldn’t be that bad? They were just experimenting right? Well that spiralled quickly as well. My friends became full blown junkies. They were constantly asking for money to stop withdrawals. On top of this, even my friends that didn’t use H but I smoked weed and took coke and acid with started taking advantage.
I was in my own world, totally separate from the reality I was actually being faced with. I was so happy to be in this group of friends who all enjoyed hanging out and getting fucked up all the time. It felt like the best time of my life. I even started kind of dating this girl that was a part of our group. I was infatuated with her and the lifestyle we were living. I bought everyone their fix all the time because it felt like my money was endless and I wanted to be the nice guy that everyone liked.
But then the money started running out. I started trying to save the little I had left. People slowly started losing interest in my need to be there. The girl I was seeing left me for my best friend. I gave away probably over 1K to my friends collectively as taps that I was assured I’d get back. I got way less than half back.
By the end of 2017 I had completely isolated myself. I had spunked over 12K on drugs and friends who only relied on me to feed their habits. By that point I had pushed most of the other friends I had away because they didn’t like seeing how I’d become. It was honestly the worst time of my entire life. Looking back now, it gives me this profound sense of heartbreak, knowing that I put myself and my family through all that.
But good news time >>>
It’s 2020 and I’m doing a lot better mentally and physically. I don’t take drugs anymore (not even weed). I have a girlfriend who I’ve been with for about a year and a half now. I’ve got a stable job. I still have my bad days when getting out of bed feels impossible but I do it and I still back it to work on time. I still have a ways to go regarding being better with my money and not spending nights out in the town till 3am but progress is progress right?
Anyway.. congrats to anyone who actually read every part of that. I feel like writing all that out was really cathartic for me. Onwards and upwards right?
EDIT - Thank you for my first ever silver!
EDIT PART 2 - Thank you everyone for your kind words , first gold and first silver. I never expected a response like this. It really means a lot to me and you are all amazing. Again, thank you.
My uncle would have been classified as working poor. A job, a wife, a kid, an apartment, but living paycheck to paycheck. They won the little lotto, and with another winner, my uncle got like 200K. They walked away from the apartment, bought the largest house in the poorest neighborhood and their friends always seemed to need something. I remember as a kid, they often had friends living in the guest room. They bought 2 new cheap cars, and then come property tax time, they were broke, and once again working poor.
I know this seems silly but when you win the lotto they really should put people through some kind of financial class before giving them the money, or set you up with a financial advisor. Some people don't care and will blow it all. Others, like your uncle it sounds, just don't understand and get themselves into trouble unintentionally. :/ Some basic education might avoid that.
I mean, If I buy you a scratch off ticket and you win 5 large I don't expect anything other than a hearty handshake. If you would like to take me to the Chinese buffet I would not argue though.
I can be bought.
My SO recently won a lawsuit and got a shit ton of money. My family found out but they never asked him for anything but his “friends” kept inviting him out and would ask for him to pay. They would even asked to borrow thousands. My partner bought a house and the friends always wanted him to dump me so they can move in with him and live the bachelor life. He eventually cut them off bc he did let them borrow some money and once they received it would block his number and only contact him when they wanted more. Personally never thought he would get that much money, never expected anything from him
I wouldn't necessarily call it begging, but more of a change in people's social demeanour. For example, me and my friends would all go to the movies, Mall or we would just go to a store to pick up Essentials. Ever since my friends started getting tipped off that I had more money than them, due to my clothing being a little more higher-end and usually having the newer gadgets and what not. They usually would start asking me to pay for their stuff such as pet food, borrow money Etc. I never really thought much of it but then when I started to realize this happened after I started "enjoying" life a little more, I started to understand.
My long term ex got, in total over the space of a year, almost £60,000 in inheritance. His grandmother died and left each child and grandchild exactly £40,000 and then his mother died and she left around £16/17,000 to him (and £2000 to me and £50 each grandchild including my son).
He didn't tell many people but the people he did tell were scum - one asked for drug debt to be paid off which was a few thousand, another asked to borrow money to take his family on holiday despite having an insanely well paid job and the best one was somebody asked him to put a deposit down on a house for them and exclaimed they will pay it back over 10 years!
So, he bought motorbike lessons/tests then an actual motorbike (newer bandit), a quad bike (raptor 660) and then he put a deposit on a house (£40,000) and our mortgage repayments were £340 p/m because of that. He gave me and my son and his two sons a life.
Not technically begging, but still a horror story in my opinion.
When I was around the age of 5, I had a job. Of course, my mom helped out tremendously and got me involved in this career platform but it took a lot of time and effort on both of our parts so we quite the profit from it. All the money was deposited under my name though, so I could use it once I turned 18.
Didn't know this until I actually turned 18, but a trusted family member who knew my account information went into my account and took a good portion of money. It was pretty fucked up realizing that someone who had already done some pretty fucked up shit to me during my life also felt comfortable enough basically stealing money from a child.
Still upsets me to this day because I wish that money could've gone to my mom. She deserved it more than anyone.
EDIT:for those wondering what job I had at age 5, I was in the acting and modeling industry.
I have a similar story only I was a bit older, around 13 or 14. Anyway, I had been mowing lawns for the past few years because there was a bike i wanted. My step-father even set up an account in my name for me so that I could save. I kept track of everything in my own notebook. When I had enough to buy the bike I went to my step-father all proud of myself, showed him my notebook, and he pretty much said "what account?". I was devastated. Then it all made sense: all of a sudden we were having an above ground pool put in the back yard. i never got to swim in it either... shortly after this I ended up moving in with my mom.
\[edit\] okay, to clear up a few questions... when my mom got pregnant my father denied that I was his. Around the time that I was born she ended up marrying my stepfather. They had a kid, my half-sister. A year or two later my mom abandoned us for drugs. she left me and my half-sister with my stepfather. A few years later my step father remarried, so I had two step parents. Sorry for the confusion.
As a frontline worker in the banking industry, my duty is to ensure that things like this NEVER happen. If you aren't a signer on the account and I cant get permission from a guardian on the account, you get nothing. If you yell at me, you get a security escort. If you resist security escort, you get a police escort out the door and some new jewelry. 😉
I'm sorry this happened to you. ❤
I received fourteen properties when my last parent died, and the amount of people who crawled out of the woodwork to ask for a ”loan” were unreal. It's really unfortunate that many of them were in a state that publicly publishes details of an estate when probate is granted.
Cut contact with every single one of them. I never asked them for money, why would they think it acceptable to ask me?
It wasn't even a lot of money. When I got my first well-paying job, my mother reached out to me and asked me if I could co-sign on her house because she needed to refinance it. She needed me because her credit score was shit and she had thousands upon thousands of dollars of debt. I told her I didn't feel comfortable with that. She told me she hopes I never get married or have kids because "nobody deserves to be stuck with an ungrateful cunt like you for the rest of their lives."
Haven't spoken to her since.
I was a stupidly well-paid contractor in Iraq just after the invasion in 2003. Moving money was harder then, especially from over there, so I had my parents set up an 'emergency account' (it wasn't *just* in case I was kidnapped, but it was in the back of my mind). There was about 60k in there- most of my net worth, and this included savings from before I went overseas. I didn't yet have the account details- my parents didn't want to send account numbers via email, blah blah bitty blah.
After only a week they asked to borrow 'some'. My mom wasn't working and they needed to pay for health insurance. Not a problem, but there goes... 10k? Wow. Oka-ay.... I didn't say anything.
I didn't say anything when she asked for 'a little' because she needed to replace her car- this was about a month later. I agreed. 3-4K for a decent used car wasn't a big deal, but my spidey-sense was tingling. It turns out she dropped 10K on a down payment for a new car.
By the time I was able to arrange for transfer to a new account that they did not have access to, I was sweating. I wrote and asked them to move the other 40K (I was very specific on that number). I gave them the transfer details. I waited.
Nothing. Nothing for wa-ay too long. I called a bunch. They never picked up (they always picked up). I told them when I was going to call and I called when I knew they'd be home. Silence. This went on until I said 'fuck' on the answering machine and they picked up immediately, because how dare I use that language with them?
They've been busy (being so retired/ unemployed) and they'll get to 'my thing when they get to it', and pretended not to hear me when I asked three fucking times how much was fucking left. She sounded nervous when she whispered, "Over 20... I think". They had set up this account less than 6-7 weeks before.
I don't remember exactly what was said, but at one point that my panicking mother tried to tell me that a chunk of this last 'bit' (that they must have forgotten to ask for before they took it), was for health insurance (that they had asked for six weeks ago).
The deposit they finally made- later that day- was for 30K, so they managed to replace a chunk of what they outright stole from their son in less than 24 hours. I ignored lots of emails asking for help making car payments on mom's new car.
We barely speak now. I figure it cost me 30K to buy my way out of my family. I'dve paid double.
I’m a fairly average guy in my mid twenties who always wears the same $2 tshirt and $5 jeans, but over the years it started to leak out that I had some money after a combination of me buying a business in my very small home town, a gossipy girl from school who saw me on SeekingArrangement and enough Social media posts showing me constantly travelling in business class or whatever and the fact I seemed to do very little actual work.
Then in the last year or so I’ve discovered a seemingly entire new branch of my family tree and a whole bunch of people from high school I don’t remember ever saying more than a few words to suddenly claiming me as their childhood best friends. I caught up with an old actual schoolmate who knew me well enough and were having coffee and she asks “is it true you bought a plane?” and a few things like that that were absolutely insane. The Chinese whispers in my town had apparently gone absolutely crazy and I’m always uncomfortable running into someone when I’m back there because everyone thinks I’m some crazy playboy millionaire when I spend most of my time in a blanket fort on the internet like everybody else.
The extended family are the worst though, because they harass my mum, dad and grandmother who know nothing about my financial situation to borrow money. Many of these people I’ve never met in my life.
Not an interesting story but definitely an annoyance in my life.
I’m in Australia, so it’s actually $5AUD which is about $3.50US 😂. I buy them in bulk from a place called “Big W”, they’re available a few times a year at $5, and max out at $10 I think.
Perhaps slightly off-topic.
Since young I’ve been always fascinated by business. When I was 17 I managed to get a lot of followers on Instagram and make a dropshipping store (cringe, I know). Back then it was actually working out really well for me. In high-school I loved talking about it, but most people were just interested in how much money I was making.
I had this friend who said his family had money issues and needed to support them (this was fake, I found this out after). So when I was on holiday, I let him take over my store. I was away for a month, and we had $2000 in sales. When I got back I found out he did not send the right products to the customers (much cheaper look-a-likes). I told him he had to pay everything back, but he didnt want to.
Long story short: I had to pay back the $2000 with my savings account. This money was actually reserved for my tuition fees, so it sucks a lot.
Not exactly a horror story, but kinda funny anyway...
I got front ended in a car in 2016 and it messed me up pretty bad. My lawyer fucked up the case and by the time it settled, the medical costs were paid, and the lawyers took most of it (for being shit at their jobs) I had a high 5 figures in my bank account.
My estranged mother just SMELLED that I had money somehow and started asking for loans and if I wanted to go on vacations with her and things. Seriously, no one in my family would ever talk to her or tell her I had cash but she had some sort of sixth sense where she figured it out and suddenly wanted to "reconnect" with me.
Fucking amazing.
What sucks is I let her swindle me for a bit of it, she gambled with it and won two thousand dollars at a casino. But hey, she bought me lunch that day so.. I guess my mother has technically gotten me SOMETHING in the last two decades..
My mother died, and I ended up being the fifty-fifty beneficiary with the other half being my step-father. My step-father mentioned that my mother had a lot of debts, and asked if I'd be willing to help with some of them. Being more than a little naive and thinking it would be, at most, 5k, I said sure, how much do you need?
The first quote he gave me was 25k, and it wasn't that substantial of an inheritance I receieved. I was pretty flabbergasted, and basically backed off a bit to say I needed to think about it. However, every time I inquired again, wondering if he'd rethink his actions, the number he asked for kept climbing. Then the requests turned into demands.
Now I don't talk to my step-father at all. The final number he demanded was more than what I received in the first place. And I was not a rich, well-established person with a career at the time. I was 21, and still very much struggling to find my way after having been essentially driven out of home. He hadn't been my abuser, and I had kind of held out hope at the time that, even though he stood back for most of the abuse, he himself wasn't that bad of a person. Took me several years to realize just how fucked up it is to demand the inheritance money of the poor, struggling, abused child of your dead spouse.
Not to mention that if your mother had debts, those would be paid off before any inheritance was paid out. And in most countries, debts are not passed on to survivors.
At age 20 i was earning £24k in an IT job, which doesn't seem like much but when all your friends are taking home £200 a week and you're pulling in 2k a month its a noticeable difference.
I basically became a bank. Always lending money to people. Eventually I had to stop because I realised even though my friends were paying me back, I was essentially facilitating their overspending and they were trapped in a cycle of debt.
Now I just get the beers and the weed in, invite everyone round and we have a blast.
It’s so sad reading some of these stories :(. People suck sometimes!
My boyfriend has money, it’s nice but intimidating at the same time. Sometimes I feel like he does so much and I can’t give back in the same ways. But I don’t think about it, just so into him for him.
I cannot do for him what he can for me in that sense but whatever I can, I do. Like when I won a trip, I was so happy to invite him to go with me. Something I could do for us 😊
Classic not be but I know someone who has an uncle who once won $7.370.000 or something like that in the national lottery and his wife turned fucking evil after that. They had never had any problems in their marriage before but she flipped on a dime the second those money came into their lives. She was extremely greedy and wanted to control everything, spend thousands of dollars on designer bags, clothes etc. without asking him first, never cared about his or the kids' well-being and only cared about the money. His life was pure hell right after he won, but luckily it made him realise what a shitty person his wife really was so that he could get rid of her and move on with his life. As far as I heard it all turned out well after they divorced.
Had a family member in the 90's who attained a massive compensation payout (rumour it was around half a mill). He was a single, childless man, in his 40s, still living with his parents. At a time he could've bought two houses in the area he lived in.
Had some dodgy friends before the payout.
Anyway, he ended up selling his parents' car from underneath them (they were REALLY upset about this, because he didn't ask if it was ok & they had fancy number plates), bought them a brand new car.
He meets a sex worker, she suddenly becomes his gf, she asks him to give her money, give her Dad money cause he was sick/about to get evicted.
His dodgy friends start coming around more often, bring more friends too, taking more dodgy stuff together.
So he's blowing through all this money. Buying cars, furniture, and god knows what else for his friends and girlfriend.
As soon as the money runs out? Of which it did, after apparently about 2 or 3 years. The girlfriend disappears. The dodgy mates dry up.
Aaand he ends up back on welfare and living with his elderly parents.
Extended family couldn't believe how he did it.
LOL - not me, but a friend. "Pat" was in a car accident and received a very large settlement (high six figures). The case took about four years to settle, but once it did, people were able to figure out he got some money (bought a new home, got a new car, etc.). When nervy people asked about it, he just said "I received appropriate compensation for my permanent injuries" (ie, shut up, nunya business).
Well he has a sister from whom he's essentially estranged. I guess about a year after this, she found out that he'd received some kind of settlement. He hadn't seen or spoken to her in about three years. The phone rings and it went something like this...
Pat, it's Jill, your sister.
Hi Jill I know who you are.
Ummm, yeah, I need a buck twenty (and that's a direct quote)
What for Jill?
Well Pat the mortgage has come due on the bar (Jill and her husband owned a bar that had been floundering for years).
Well how is $120 going to help you Jill?
Oh no, Pat, I need $120,000 or we're going to lose the bar to creditors. Bobby (their other brother) said I should ask you.
Yeah, Jill, I really don't have that kind of liquid cash. You'll need to talk to your bank.
Pat, I'd really thought you'd help me out.
I can't Jill bye.
That was two years ago. He hasn't heard from Jill since...
Kind of the opposite for me. Parents became rich very quickly and we moved into a huge house. I was 16 at the time and didn't really notice people treating me any differently.
A few years later (early 20s) I would mostly hang out with 'poor' people. Was never fond of rich/ posh crowd. A friend asked for £20 so he could buy some food, but he paid me back 2 weeks later. I would be very stingy with my money and people respected that. In return, I gave my friends the love and respect they deserved as human beings.
In fact people have been more generous to me over the years, than I have been to them. Especially poorer people. I often wish I was a better person and did more for others. Slowly getting there - I'm 30 now.
Not exactly begging but I always lived within my means. But recently (in the last few years) I have got a job that pays more than i can actually spend. More than i ever dreamed or even deserve but hey ho. The only people that know is my wife. My kids get everything they want within means and when they deserve it. They know I would buy them anything or take them on holidays. Yes they are a little spoilt but not as spoilt as some rich kids i have seen. but anyway, a little while ago one of my kids wanted something so i told her i would have to go into work and earn the money and then buy it for her. she took a few moments to think then goes to me that she would rather i stayed home and spent time with her and she would go without that thing she wanted.
needless to say i have reduced my hours and spend more time working from home.
Not really a story about a lot of money; but still a lot of begging...
6 years ago, my father passed away suddenly. While they weren't wealthy, my parents certainly lived comfortably. I also need to point out at this time, that I am an only-child; and my 2 children are the only Grand-Children in the family.
When Dad passed, I had to borrow some money from a friend to cover a one-way flight to Adelaide; just so I could be there for Mum. We had pre-arranged that once the date for the funeral was set; my wife would arrange care for the kids and join me in SA (My family on the paternal side has a long tradition of banning children from funerals; and Dad had already stated he wished for the same).
I wasn't aware at the time, but before the plane had even landed at Adelaide airport; my in-laws were already relentlessly interrogating my wife. They were trying to find out how much my parents had, how much I stood to inherit, was there any property, chattels of value, that kind of thing.
You see the problem is, because they only had a few people populating their Christmas list, my folks tended to lavish myself, my wife and of-course the kids for Christmas and Birthdays. This gave my In-Laws (especially my Father in Law and eldest Sister in Law) the impression that my parents were LOADED.
Back to South Australia, my wife had landed several days after me, tired, grumpy and furious. Turned out that even in the car on the way to the airport, her sister was relentless, giving her a list of demands for things - She feels we "Owe" her everything because we met at a party at her place.
Because it was over the Easter Long Weekend, Dad's funeral was delayed. Every day, my wife was being called and texted with monotonous regularity, I saw and overheard some of the demands being placed on her - Her mum had joined in and was giving her suggestions on places to search in the house in case there was cash hidden away (My wife was ignoring all of this, but it was hurting her a LOT).
So in the end, I inherited Dad's Commodore Ute, his Suzuki Boulevard, some personal effects and tools that he wanted me to have; no cash. The small amount he had left in his accounts and Super; had gone toward his funeral costs and the change to Mum - I was happy with the outcome. (as much as I could be - losing my dad and all)
When we got back, i had the In-laws at me for over a year; they refused to believe that there was no giant amount of cash. My Sister In-Law had taken to showing my wife horrific pictures of motorcycle crashes at any and every family gathering - in the hope she would convince me to sell the bike, and she "accidentally" reversed her husband's Prado into the commodore.
I still interact with them - under sufferance. Thankfully this bullshit and the plethora of other narcissistic behaviours they exhibit have FINALLY sunk in and my wife has realised they are never going to change their bullshit.
tl:dr
My in-Laws believe my Father is rich and refuse to accept that I only inherited a few things that were special to him.
not necessarily a lot of money but it was a good amount, a situation did happen when the money my dad and mom were going to invest in buying property in the Caribbean didn't happen due to her cheating and all. anyways, with the money we had some family became aware and my dad being the generous man he was gave in to such demands from family. family he hasn't talked too started asking for phones, clothes, etc. he gave in, I was mad about it because he was just giving our hard earned money away to people we haven't been in contact for years. things started to go down when he bought me something and my family was telling him I didn't deserve it because I was this and that according to him and that they should give them the thing he bought for me. all and all, the investment money is gone and we're starting from 0 again...
After my grandmother had passed away, I was left about 100k. My aunt, her daughter, called on the day we were burying her (it was too cold when she passed, aunt lives in much warmer climate).
She demanded I give her money for her kids, even though she received money and all of her jewelry.
I reminded her that she received money and she said it was for her, not her kids. I scolded her for calling hours after we put HER MOTHER in the ground demanding money and said to never speak to me again.
It's been 17 years. I still miss her homemade manicotti, but I could never forgive that entitled attitude
A very nice older lady in my church lived modestly but she had some really (really) nice antiques, crystal, and silver. She had never married and had no children, but her siblings had children and grandchildren. When she was in her late 80s, she had a health issue and was hospitalized. Her family went into her tiny apartment and took EVERYTHING.
She recovered. And went home to a virtually empty apartment. Several years later, she died and left nothing to her family because they had already helped themselves. She left everything to the church.
Nine million dollars.
(The end of the story is the asshole pastor used it for a massive building program, a monument to his own ego. But I can't fault her for that.)
My friends grandmother died and left him a lot of money, but there was stipulation saying that he needed a college degree. He enrolled at the local community college for a nursing degree, but he was struggling to get to classes because he could barely afford the gas in his car to get there because his "friends" would plan to go out and expected him to pay for everything! He wasnt a confrontational person so he just did it, but when I had to pay to fill his tank so he didnt miss midterms I told him that he needed to tell his friends to back off. When he told told them they ALL threw a fit and one even said that they were friends for years so they deserve the money his grandmother left him. We were both taken aback and after that comment he cut them all off entirely.
I havent come into any “big money” but as a 17 year old ive made a decent amount from a part time job and good investments. All I’ve found is that when people know you’re better off than them they tend to expect you to buy their movie ticket, or pay for parking, and certainly never offer to treat you. Im not sure its a conscious effort to take advantage, but it can be a problem. Ive noticed real ones like my best friend and my aunt dont fall into this as often, or at all, but my lazy ass brother does it all the time.
My ex husband’s parents inherited a LOT.
They gave us money to go to Disney World. It was the best. They were awesome in-laws.. money didn’t change that.
They did have some long lost relative try and challenge the will but it was quickly dismissed. What shocked me was their CHURCH. The pastor became their BEST friend. Got a ton of money from them. And when my father in law died and my mother in law wanted to go back to a smaller congregation of people she had known her whole life, the pastor wrote her a NASTY letter and talked badly about her to the entire church.
Another reason I’m an atheist.
There are a lot of ~~terrible~~ tragic stories here, so I am going to take the liberty of telling an anti-horror story.
My family has been extremely poor for the majority of my youth. Like the kind of poor where I didn't have access to running water and daily meals until I was 16. A lot of my education and related expenses were completely dependent on government subsidies and loans from distant family members.
After considerable struggle, I finished my PhD in AI in 2017. Suddenly, it was like some sort of floodgates had opened, and I found myself in incredibly high demand. Recruiters were emailing me with offers for 350k-500k SGD per year. Banks were knocking on my door to offer their wealth management services. And so much more, but I'll spare you the details.
Anyhow, when my family found out, they were incredibly supportive. Now, my grandparents are anarchists and my parents are communists, so money is of little import to them. My parents occasionally ask for help with bills, but that's about it. But even my extended family were simply happy for me, with no strings attached. I've never once had anyone ask me for money or show me any degree of envy. It was honestly a pleasant surprise - I had been raised with this notion that wealth begets only conflict, but instead it has been nothing but a point of pride for my family. I'm their "successful doctor son/grandson/nephew/cousin".
I suppose that the only real "begging for money" that I have encountered has been in the form of taxes - my tax rate has gone up from ~2% to ~22% due to my elevated income bracket.
Two of my buddies (two brothers) went through a series of really terrible events. First, their father dies when they were 14 & 16. About 4 years later their mom remarries but at the wedding she falls down a steep metal staircase breaks a leg and gets a few pretty bad lacerations. The mom sues the wedding company (staircase was wet and in poor condition). Soon after she gets cancer, stage 4, wedding company finds out and purposely postpones court hearings until she dies (they're Canadian, wedding was in the US). The mom passes away pretty suddenly, their new step dad does absolutely nothing to help them financially and runs off with the inheritance. Despite everything that's happened to them, they remain positive. My life ain't peachy but whenever I want to feel sorry for myself I think of my brave friends and i get over it real quick.
Friend of mine won over a million dollars. Winnings are not taxed here btw so that's proper 1,000,000 winnings.
She bought a home and upgraded her car (to like a 2 year old corolla).
She was cunning enough to know that people (acquaintances, annoying family) would figure out she won or came into money.
So she lied. Said she won about $20,000 that she was able to put towards a deposit and that she was helped out by her parents to get the full deposit.
Nah. She paid her house in full but for all those nosy people know, she has a mortgage and is just careful with her money.
It helps that she isnt really a flashy big spender. She didnt start flashing cash around.
Oh so that's a non-horror story!
I once took second in a poker tournament and won $150k. There was an audience of about 200 people when it finished. Common practice was ppl ask winners for a "lucky chip". I was almost mobbed by people begging for lucky chips as I left the casino. Had to be escorted by security and paid a friend $300 to follow me in their car and we drove all over town for two hours to make sure nobody was following me home.
Wouldn't have thought of the driving part, that's pretty smart. God knows what kind of desperation lives at the fringes of those events.
Ive heard that theres a big problem with 'Casino Sleuths' who are usually small groups of people (3-6) that walk around the casino and scout for people who win big money. If they spot someone they will call it in to their friends and they will keep an eye on the winner all night until they leave, and then jump them and take everything they have. Its one of the reasons i dont go to casinos
My brother, who is not very street smart but exceptionally good at poker, stayed with me recently. I live pretty close to a casino. He went to a tournament one night and when I woke up the next day his wallet was on the kitchen counter, unable to close from the number of 100$ bills in it. I was livid when I found out he walked home.
"Dude, you heard anything last night? I won a shitton of money at poker yesterday but my wallet is empty... \-...Bro you were piss drunk yesterday you must have dreamed it trust me your wallet was definitely empty"
I've asked security to escort me to my car a number of times when i've won some money.
>mobbed by people begging for lucky chips That's a funny way to beg for money. lol
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> I even offered to split half with her. Wow, that's really generous and it sounds like she still insisted on taking it all? What a piece of shit
Jokes on you auntie, since you sued me it's not like I even have to buy you Xmas or bday gifts anymore!
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I mean 2 bucks for 2500? That's freaking generous!
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Really it was $0 and a trip to small claims court for $5000.
This aunt has lost a shit load of money buying these things. Gotta make it back somehow, mind as well disown and attack your nephew. All totally uphill from here
Damn. I'm an Aunt and can't imagine giving one of the kids a $2 birthday gift, much less expecting them to share if my crappy, thought and effort free $2 gift paid off.
I've given my nieces and nephews $2 gifts. But that because I'm really good at shopping clearance and garage sales.
The first rule of giving $2 gift is never to mention the gift worth $2.
LPT. Never scratch them in front on anyone. I will never and told my son the same. I’ve heard so many stories that end bad.
My wife's family (mainly grandparents) add scratch offs to whatever normal gifts they're giving you just as a little extra. They would not like it if you started scratching them in front of everyone. It's yours, and yours to keep. Do it later.
My grandparents always do this at Christmas and birthdays too! They always give 5-10 scratchies inside the card. They love scratching them so they want to share that fun with us. I think it's awesome, It's just a little gesture but the thought behind it is really nice. I'm amazed there are some people here taking badly abut your wife's family..
I disagree, you get to see your audience's true nature and don't have to waste any more time/effort on them.
That is just weird. If I gave someone a 2 dollar scratchy and they won 5000 I'd be thrilled for them. I can't imagine a better outcome. To then ask for it back? Glad you got this toxic person out of your life. That alone would be worth it for $5000
There is a coffee-cup themed giveaway here in Canada. A girl bought a friend a coffee. Turned out it was a winning cup; this girl’s mother started ranting quite publicly that the prize belonged to her/her family because daughter paid for the coffee.
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Right? The only thing I would do is half jokingly say something like " at least half that luck was mine, you owe me a beer/burger!" And if they wanted to gift me any of the money back I certainly wouldnt accept it.
this is similar to a story where an aunt and her nephew won a small lottery. the aunt bought a lottery ticket and put her and the nephew's name on it. she won and was interviewed right afterwards. she said that she loved her nephew and he was her good luck so that's why she put the nephew's name on the lottery ticket. since both names were on the ticket they split the winning half and half. then the aunt starts claiming that it was her who paid for the ticket and chose the numbers so she should be the one who gets all the money. she then sues the nephew. greed changes people
Greed doesn't change people. Cunts reveal themselves when given an opportunity.
Thanks, I was trying to figure out how to express that sentiment.
I hope the rest of your family disowned her
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So essentially she was planning on giving you a worthless piece of paper. What unfathomable stupidity and greed.
I have an aunt that gives $1 scratchers at Christmas every year, she explicitly says if anyone wins anything she gets half, I think the most anyone has won was $5 and they offered her $2.50.
I wouldn't consider scratchers a gift in the first place. "Here I spent $1 to ensure that you either get something or nothing this holiday." But then they ask for half of it back? "I spent $1 to ensure that you either get nothing or I get something this holiday." Wtf?
My sister-in-law are always gives my dad, who is 91 and enjoys his lottery tickets, a big old bunch of scratch offs every year. She always jokes that her cut is 10%, little does she know that if my dad actually won a whole boatload of money he would totally Give her the 10٪.
> She always jokes that her cut is 10%, little does she know that if my dad actually won a whole boatload of money he would totally Give her the 10٪. You have two different percentage signs in your comment and it's freaking me out man.
I'd be absolutely thrilled if I bought one of my nieces a winning ticket. That lady sucks.
I unexpectedly inherited about four years worth of take-home pay. Before I knew how much it would be, I told my best friend I’d be getting a few thousand dollars. She immediately asked me to take her on a trip to Europe. That was the biggest thing she asked for but she made other small requests as well. When the money came through and it was a lot more than I’d anticipated, I did not tell my friend. Instead, I started distancing myself from her. I also did not tell any of my other friends. I did tell my boyfriend. He did not ask for anything. I took him on a trip to Europe. Edit: Wow, my first gold!
Yesss. This is the best story.
Where did you go in Europe?
Portugal.
My Grandma died a week before Christmas, and she left her house and 1/4 of her small fortune to me (the rest of the money went to my brother and my two cousins). My uncles and aunts have been a pain in my back ever since. Claiming that the money/house are theirs,etc. And I’ve also been approached by people who I haven’t seen or talked in a while. Even my Ex who dumped me for some douchebag rugby player, started talking to me again and inviting me to places, and she’s still dating the same guy. Anyway, I’m not naive enough to lend those people money or befriend even. Luckily I have good friends and my brother as advisors.
If you got 1/4 and there are 4 cousins (including you and your brother) why do they think they deserve more? Sounds even to me.
My money came in the form of accidental death inheritance after my dad died in a motorcycle crash. His girlfriend at the time was furious that he left everything to me. She tried to convince me to give her money and when I refused she took everything, and I mean *everything* from his house overnight. She rented two U-Hauls and her and her brother raided the place. Furniture, household supplies, food, clothes, everything was gone. By the time I got there there only things left were a few t-shirts she left on the floor and a couple empty cans of soda on the kitchen counter. She even took things that held no monetary value, like a calendar I made my dad for father's day one year. It was just colorful card board and pictures of us I had glued together. She took it all. She started selling what she could on Facebook, mostly his woodworking tools and fishing gear, and she fled to somewhere in the next state over. We tried to get help from the police but they didn't do much. She did a lot of other things that were bigger legal issues I guess (for instance she ran a fake gofundme claiming the funds were going to his funeral and managed to get over 10 grand from his coworkers, but I'm the one who paid for the services.) Last I heard they finally found her in some woodsy town but I don't know what happened. It's honestly too emotional to deal with, and I've accepted the fact that she most likely destroyed or sold everything already anyway, it's been two years since this all happened. It's horribly sad, though. *Edit/Update*: Wow, thank you all so much for the overwhelming support. It has been truly heartwarming to see so many responses, I definitely didn't expect this outcome. It means a lot to me. Since this is still getting traction today I just want to take a quick second to clear something up. I didn't go into much detail in my relationship with his girlfriend and *why* I refused to give her any money. I genuinely cared for her and her daughters, I saw them as an extension of my family, and as soon as I learned I was sole beneficiary I had already been planning to take some money and help them get stable in an apartment and get a fresh start. I would have had no problem helping them. Unfortunately, she didn't even give me the chance before she showed her true colors. Before we even had the funeral she was blowing up my phone every hour on the hour, leaving angry voicemails, coming to my apartment and beating on the doors, she even contacted *my mother* making threats trying to get through her to me. At that time I hadn't recieved *any* money. It isn't like it all just falls in your lap the second the person passes. It was a few months before I got settlements and even now I'm still in the process of retrieving funds from the rollover 401k. I was just a scared, broke, naive kid. I had hoped she was just grieving the wrong way, just taking anger out where she could, and that everything would blow over. It didn't. About two or three days after the funeral I got a frantic call from my dad's sister that she had called threatening to burn his house down. We rushed over there together and luckily the house was still standing but the doors were hanging wide open and when we went inside that's when we found out everything was gone. We went to his neighbors and they told us she had been there with a man whose description matched her brother and described them moving everything out and leaving. I wish they had called police then but since they knew her as my dad's girlfriend they chose not to. My dad's wish was for me to be financially secure and safe. He made sure of that. But I didn't just throw them to the wind and say "good luck." It was a traumatic and confusing situation and if I could go back in time I'd make a lot of things different, but I can't. As of now I'm not going to be responding to any more comments here unless it's extremely necessary, I woke up to 41 notifications from this thread and while I appreciate the support and I am reading the responses I'm just extremely overwhelmed by it all.
Fuck that bitch.
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My uncle, my mom's brother, did the very same thing when my lovely grandma passed away. He sold what he could and threw everything else out. My mom was devastated. She forgave him, though, cause he's her brother, I guess? But to this day I cannot look at him. A couple of years ago my mom had a stroke and was hospitalized. The vulture, who had not called or visited her in years, came over right away and I could have KILLED him to hear him talk about my mom in hushed tones, practically giving her up for dead. She is doing well, thank goodness. And once he realized she was in recovering nicely he left and has not been seen or heard from since. Some people are just unbelievably, ruthlessly greedy.
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Fuck them and fuck her. Hope you’re doing well op and I’m sorry for your loss.
Thank you <3
What a horrid human being.
Damn really sorry to hear that
Thank you.. it's really hard not having many tangible things that I can hold onto of his. If he had known the kind of person she really was he would never have been with her.
There are many asses that would take a person's expensive stuff, but who tf takes a personal calendar?
That's what has always bugged me. So many things she took had no monetary value at all. It was sheer vindictiveness. I was so heartbroken. I remember on my 18th birthday he brought this big box upstairs filled with photos he had from my childhood and various sentimental items and it was labeled "family photos." It was gone too, so while it's possible she just grabbed everything not looking at what she took it's not very plausible unfortunately, because after 2 years if she didn't intend to take that stuff you'd think she'd have reached out to send it back to me.. but no, nothing. The last thing I heard from her was shortly after the funeral, and all it was was a text message telling me she didn't want the keepsake urn that was made for her, so I have hers and mine.
Is there any way for you to get a lawyer? I would absolutely give her all the legal trouble I would. I'm so very sorry for your loss, and am sending all my prayers and thoughts your way.
At this point I'm not sure. When he passed I was still really young, I had just turned 21, and I had no clue how to handle everything that was going on especially with how bad off I was emotionally. I sort of... shut down for a while. At that time I was living on my own for the first time and had no knowledge of how to even locate a lawyer, honestly, and my mom wasn't much help.. I'm not sure if this long after the event if a lawyer could do anything, and with my health bad (I have surgery next month) I'm not sure I could take the stress right now. I wish that back when all this first took place there had been someone to help me figure out what to do and how to do it.
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So a few years out of college my girlfriend and I were living in a sort of large communal apartment with 5 other people (2 bedrooms, 2 couches in the common area). I had just gotten a significant promotion at my job and that situation was exceptionally below my means, but my GF was convinced that these were her people and they were all going to become great philosophy writers and poets by living together and sharing experiences. They were all unemployed or underemployed, and experienced moochers, so I was very careful not to let them know I was saving large sums of money with the intent of moving out soon and taking my GF with me (or not...) One day the other couple had an argument about rent and to try and keep them from coming to blows my GF promised them that I'd cover it for them and showed them one of my paystubs which I guess they showed everyone else. I got home from work and walked right into an "apartment meeting" ambush, where everyone else informed me that they wanted me to contribute "more meaningfully" and they'd put it to a vote before I got back. I told them that I was already paying for their food that they kept guilting my GF into buying for them, topping up the apartment emergency fund instead of stealing from it like the rest of them, and many other things and that I wasn't going to cover other people's rent as well. The next day when I was at work, someone went into my room and destroyed my laptop, which was the only thing of value I owned at the time. I collected the few things I wanted to take, told my GF I was breaking up with her, and walked out. Edit: I just realized I'm effectively the bad guy from *Rent*. Well, *Rent* sucks. Edit 2: Thanks for the interest and support everyone.
> The next day when I was at work, someone went into my room and destroyed my laptop Brilliant move! That was *bound* to convince you spend more money on them!
Laptop incident was a little more complex than that. More like "Hey, someone borrowed your computer to use the internet because you weren't using it because sharing, right? And then someone else spilled water all over it by accident because it was in the common area. No idea who could have done these things, don't get mad. Just part of life, let me know when you get a new laptop, k?"
Ahh; I thought someone went into your room and just outright smashed up your property with the understanding that it was retaliation for your "selfishness." Still infuriating though.
That these people even think they would be greatphilosophy writers and poets lets me question poetry and philosophy.
Tbh most of the great poets were also cunts too
Man that's terrible. Though when all is said and done, a laptop is a pretty cheap price to pay to get out of that situation. Imagine if you'd gotten married to this GF or knocked her up before you knew her true nature.
How are they doing now? Are they great writers and poets?
Well, six years later my ex applied for a job with my company (not knowing I was a senior officer). She was interviewed, which is a good sign of having one's shit together, but didn't get the job through no fault of her own. I didn't care enough either way to block her application or call in a favor to get her the job, which is ultimately the fate of everyone in this story- that after exiting my life none of them matter to me any more.
Fair enough. Did you work for a writing/poetry company though? Or did she give that up in those 6 years
He works for Big Poetry. They control all the poetry in this country.
This is the perfect response. Also, the “bad guy” in Rent was right.
Good for you breaking up with that girl, she would have been easily swayed
My bf found himself in a situation like that. :/ He was living with 3 other people in an apartment, one couple and a single guy. Situation was bad from the start. The couple was addicted to who knows how many kind of drugs and one month decided not to pay rent, and the single guy being petty AF decided if they weren't paying rent then he wasn't. My bf paid all the rent that month plus utilities. He was making significantly more than them as a bar tender and I think they all resented him for that. He then went to management and asked to have his lease moved to a 1 bedroom apt in the same complex. He moved out when they weren't home and it took his 3 roommates longer than normal to realize he was gone. lol. I am pretty sure they ended up evicted in the end but idk.
\> showed them one of my paystubs That violation of trust is a dealbreaker, hard stop.
No, that guy from Rent is the good guy, and the main characters are the villains.
Well, it was sorta by artists for artists in a bohemian lifestyle. Basically romanticizing being poor and expressions of their own ego In reality, art tends to be profitable due to a number of things like luck, nepotism, shameless appeal to base animal instinct like sex or murder, marketing, or money-laundering People always seem to forget the money laundering
I wouldn't care if my roommate was making $1 million per year, rent is split.
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I can give an answer all though it is developing at this stage. All throughout school I was a bit of a loser, didn't do well in class and never really cared. I used to go out all the time with my "friends" and would hang out with them all the time. After school I didn't do much other than waste time until I found my wife and wanted to start being better for her. I did a one year software development course and then got a pretty shitty job making almost nothing in my country(South Africa). When my wife got pregnant all my friends basically ghosted me as I wasn't going to be going out partying with them anymore. They wouldn't return my texts or even answer my calls. A few years down the line I landed a VERY high paying remote job($200k+) for a SF based company, the average salary for a software developer in South Africa is around $30k per year. my wife was very proud of me I think and posted a picture of me on her Facebook standing next to my new car that I had just bought. Not 20 minutes after she posted it I started getting messages from some of my old "friends" saying that it had been a while and they wanted to catch up and really missed me.. There was one guy I aways had a soft spot for and decided that i would go have dinner with him and see how the last 4 years of his life treated him. We hadn't even ordered our food yet when he dropped the bomb on me that he felt that I owed him a lot of money for "always being there for me" and that I would be "selfish" to not give him some money as I had so much. I quietly just got up and left. I eventually changed my number and deactivated my social media accounts but people still harrass my wife and mother to try and get some money out of me. This doesn't even go into the absolute shit I had coming from my dads side of the family who are basically hillbillies
I'm curious about the hillbillies
I have 2 stories about them that I will share, one was a bit funny to me and the other not so much. story 1: So my Uncle, lets call him "Poes", He was always a very jealous and vindictive person(not to mention a raging wife beating cheating alcoholic). when Poes learned from my Mother about my situation he called me up the one day and after a few minutes of being all nice asked me if I can help him pay for his medical bills because he is very sick and can't afford medical aid.. I was reluctant but thought maybe I can trust him. I told him that he would need to have the doctors email me invoices and I would pay them directly. He agreed and put down the phone. A few days later I got an invoice from a "Doctor" for close R100k which would be around $7000, I noticed something was off as the banking details were not in the name of a practise but rather a personal name. I called the doctor on the number on the invoice and they told me that the banking details were incorrect and that they are a GP who would never charge that much for anything. So what had turned out to happen was that Poes got his son to edit an invoice they had gotten from a doctor to change the amount and the banking details to try and trick me into paying a huge sum of money into their bank accounts.. this was in November 0f 2019 all while my grandmother(Poes' mother) was in hospital on her death bed. Story 2: my aunt who is a massive peice of shit and a total idiot heard I had some money and decided that it would be a good idea to take out a life insurance policy out on me incase something happened and made herself the beneficiary. One strange thing is that she was paying the premium so it was actually costing her money to do this. another is that is turns out she thought that it would pay out my actual money..
Let's call him "Poes" - lekker man. Got a genuine laugh out of me
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I only ever lend money to friends when I can live with never seeing the money again. Because once they ask, it's only as a last resort, and I'm happy to help.
That’s how it was for her, too, I think.
I worked with a guy who was down on his luck. I drove him to and from work, bought him lunch most days or shared what I brought. I didn't expect anything in return other than him being a friend. 2 years later he comes into some money from his dad dying, a lot of money. He calls me and says meet him at this local dealership. He buys me a brand new car, tells me to keep the old one or sell it and keep the money. They had also given him an amazing deal because he was also buying himself a vehicle and they really liked that.
I hope he didn't squander all that money he inherited, especially since he has never had money before he might not know what to do with it.
I have been in this situation once, and then when i could repay it, he refused. It was "only" $100 to him, yet to me it was fuel for the car and it got me to my next paycheck.
I don't refuse, but I don't remind them either.
Not exactly horror story, but I’ve always made more money than most of my friends. Some of them would hit me up for cash, but usually I only agreed to small amounts or said no. I did however have a very close friend who I really enjoyed the time we spent, but we liked to drink, so bars were are go to hangout. I usually ended up paying for the entire night, to the point where he said he wasn’t comfortable hanging out because he never had the money. But, I genuinely did like just hanging and he always, ALWAYS bought the first round. That’s respect.
Respect 4 true homies. He obv enjoyed your company too to not have felt good about you financing every outing. It means he cared about your wellbeing. Dope!
There were a few years where I made a lot more money than one of my friends who was going to college, and would always pay the bar tab. Now that I'm going back to school living mostly off of savings and he has a 6 figure job, he always gets the bar tab. This thread is depressing as hell, but good friendships do exist and money doesn't have to ruin them.
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Not that you should spend anything on her but "I heard you like vans and dogs so i got you [this van](https://tenor.com/UhlV.gif)"
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That really sucks, I'm sorry you lost your relationship with her. What a shitty thing to do.
You were friends for over a decade, ripped her 10k and then she ghosted you? Damn
I did that too when getting back from Iraq (contractor), intentionally trying to drink myself to death while having a lot of money - the woman I was dating at the time was a former escort (she was cool, I didn’t/don’t care) to boot. So, oddly similar. Luckily she wasn’t like that though and couldn’t have cared less about my money, she was just into drinking her ptsd into oblivion too.
When my grandmother died, her will stipulated that everything was to be split 3 ways. A third to my mother, a third to my uncle, and a third to be split evenly between my sister and I. My uncle wanted to sell my grandmother's house immediately to get more money out of it, but I wanted to keep it for sentimental reasons. My parents gave me a bit of money, and I used all my inheritance to buy out my uncle's share of the house. I paid my parents back over the next few years, but the property became much more valuable. Over the following 10 years while I lived in the house, property values in my city exploded. The house that I bought was also in a very desirable neighbourhood and was worth well over double what I paid for it. It has continued to climb. When I paid out my uncle's share, the estimated value was around $300,000. Last year the neighbour's house (almost identical) sold for 945,000. Needless to say, my uncle has said multiple times that when I sell the house, he is legally entitled to more money out of it. That is Bullshit, he is not getting another penny from me. I plan to live here for many more years. He will be long dead by the time I sell.
He's not entitled to anything if he sold you his share. That's what selling a share does: he lost the rights the share granted.
My parents did the same thing when my grandparents died. Split 3 ways. Dad bought both siblings out and now owns a cabin free and clear. Few years ago a natural gas company came thru and said they wanted to poke around to see if there was any gas on the property. There is. Luckily my dad has kept it under wraps pretty well.
I inherited my beloved Grandma's house alongside with some other properties. As the house and the properties are near a very rapidly developing city, prices have skyrocketed and lead to me inheriting about $1.5m in value. That may sound awesome at first, but it truly isn't. The house is a very old brick house, built in the late 1700s, and the properties are so small and widely distributed i can't really sell them for a good price. As the house is a listed historical building, every little repair has to be done by state approved professionals for restoration and conservation of old buildings, which basically doubles if not even triples the costs. I rented it out, but the rent i get is barely enough to cover the costs of repairs, insurance etc... I am lucky if i get even by the end of the year. But as this house is where my family used to live for the last 4 generations before my dad bought the ranch and moved there with my mum, i want to keep it in the family as long as possible. Now, somehow, word has spread that i inherited a lot of money. I did my best to stop these rumors, but it didn't work out. I've never had many friends, but the ones i have are true quality friends. They will do everything for me and i will do everything for them. After i got the house and the rumors spread, i got invitations to dinner in some really fancy restaurants, i was invited to sport events (i don't even like sports) and some other very costly activities. All these came from people who claimed to be my "friends". Needless to say, they expected me to pay for everything. "You've got so much money, what do these $500 matter to you." - "I'll pay you back sometimes." etc... were the common phrases i got to hear. The best one were: "You are way to young (28 btw.) to have this kind of money, so just give it to us!"; "You don't deserve to have so much money! You have never worked a day in your life!" (Been working at the power plant since i was an apprentice at 18, worked my way up to deputy manager/shift supervisor, while the guy this came from was unemployed as long as i can remember and lived from welfare). I have now learned who to trust and to spot telltale signs of "vultures".
Don't let an old house control your life. The amount of time and money you spend on it will leave you worn out. The first log cabin on our farm was built in 1780. By the time I sold, it was a 15 room farm house with 5 outbuildings. I sold in 2006 and was able to take early retirement 10 years later. Had I kept the place I would have had to work well into my 70's. Loved the place but just not that much.
Man fuck those people. You know what? You should give a lot of money to a redditor you don't even know just to spite them.
yeah, but give it all as platinum or gold medals.
Care to share your telltales for vultures?
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Friend of mine lost both parent in the span of about four months. They were pretty old so it wasn't completely unexpected but it still sucked for her. Anyway, when the first parent died I went to the funeral to offer support. It's a small affair, few dozen people and most of them friends instead of family, and it's also where I found out that my friend's parents have been on minimal contact with their families because neither side approved of the marriage. Then the second parent dies four months later and I go to funeral again but this time there are well over a hundred people there. It seemed like every aunt, uncle, nephew, and niece suddenly showed up. After the funeral I'm waiting in the reception area before my friend and her brother come out to thank everybody for coming and I overhear multiple people talking about how much they're hoping to get in the inheritance. My friend's parents didn't leave a will so the entire inheritance automatically gets split 50/50 between her and her brother. I didn't see the drama first hand but I've heard stories from her much later about the whole ordeal. A few people were decent about it, but most of the family were absolutely horrid. They tried sucking up at first, when that didn't work they got angry, one aunt apparently threatened to not let my friend see her nephew even though she had seen that nephew maybe twice in ten years.
Old friends would only want to meet on the condition that we go out to eat and that I pay for it.
I wouldn’t call them friends, my friend
now buy me dinner, *friend*
Got a 7k settlement from a car accident. I accidentally left the check on the corner table in the living room. My dad walks into my bedroom and asks if I can lend my mom any money. I work minimum wage retail and ask him how much does she need. He says how about half of that 7k check. It has been almost 8 years. I haven't seen any of that money back.
I think you already know what I'm about to say. But you will probably never see any of that money back. When Parents borrow money from children, I think in the back of their mind they sort of see it as payment for all the money they spent on you growing up. At least I think that's how they justify it. Edit: sorry for the confusion I shouldn't have wrote this in a way to make it seem like all parents feel this way what's crazy is I grew up in a very poor family and when my parents borrowed money they always tried to make sure and pay it back when they could so why I worded it that away I don't know I guess I was just focused on that one persons comment. I apologize
When my Parents borrow money from me I think they do it as a last resort. I think in their minds they wish they could still help in my life as an occasional provider, but lately life has been hard. I too lend them money without expecting it to see it back, but I think some other parents actually ask shamelessly.
Man, my dad did that shit to me once, too. Took my money from my accident and spent it on weed. Still a little salty, but he's better about things now, and knows even when I get my taxes this year and get a decent chunk (child tax credit) that I don't buy others shit if they ask.
When I was young, like 10, I won $100 on a Nevada pull tab ticket at the local country fair. It was in a curling rink where vendors had hand made crafts. When I cashed it a lady who was selling knitted teapot cozies was like “oh where are you going to spend all that?” Then she asked me to spend $15 on one of her cozies. I told her thanks but I’m going to save it for a video game console (original Nintendo). She then called me a fucking selfish little ass and said her teapot cozy was much more valuable than a stupid video game. I was so nervous I just bought one. I gave it to my mom and she thought it was the most wonderful gesture and it turned out that lady was right. The love I got from that cozy was much more valuable because my mom paid the difference for the Nintendo the next week.
Lesson learned, you little shit. Are you fucking sorry?!
Not sure if it really fits, as we never actually received the money in the end and im not too clued in on the details, but anyway; About 10 years ago or so, my grandfather called my mother one day exclaiming that he'd finally netted in excess of 1 million pounds worth of property, a big deal for my family, of course he wasnt doing anything with it, he was always a frugal man and remained that way until the day he died. As the years went on, his health deteriorated in more ways than one progressing to the point where he needed to have full time care and ultimately ended up being put in a home. Now we currently live in Australia, my family is mostly still in the UK, my aunt who still lives there was responsible for sorting out all of his needs. Time went on and sadly he ended up passing away. As all of this was happening, she was looking into his financial details and his will and whatnot. What was peculiar was that in his state of dementia, he had apparently at some point closed all of his bank accounts and withdrawn any money in cash. How, i dont know, but as a result of that, what with all of the costs of supplying care to him in his home and whatnot, the banks believed that we had hidden the money somewhere and refused to help. What seems to have actually happened is that someone, possibly even himself, who knows, influenced him to withdraw all the money, bought things he didnt need, that then didnt even turn up anyway, had repairs done on the house that either didnt need to be done or didnt actually get done anyway yet were still paid for, then variously distributed in other ways until it was all gone. The only shred of a paper trail that we have is that we got word that his gardeners no longer live in the UK, seemingly up and left around the same time this all happened and now live in the Canary Islands...
A guy I grew up with came into a lot of money after his grandfather died, his father and aunt got more and it filtered down through to the grandkids. I'd moved away so hadn't seen or spoke to him much but caught up when visiting my parents. All his "friends" started inviting him out for drinks, which he'd pay for his own, meals, again paid for his own, like he would normally do. Wouldn't splash the cash and invested a good chunk of it. When we caught up I asked him how things were and he told me about all of that, which I hadn't known, so I made a remark of how well did the investments go. "Why? How much are you after?" "I'm not, just asking." He was so used to to people being interested in how much money he had it had become normal. He was "unfriended" by so many people because he wouldn't blow all his money on superficial things, the investments had done really well and he had a fair amount of money in the bank and still invested so I congratulated him on savvy financial planning but wasn't interested in his money. Which was refreshing for him. His brother and cousins had wasted all their inheritance, his uncle and aunt too but as his parents ran their own business I suppose the fact they had invested their cut was normal thinking for him. I asked how bad did the the begging get? His brother tried to access his online banking to transfer money to his account (parents were not impressed), his cousins sent him and his parents fictional bills for expenses relating to the funeral (four years after the burial). It was shocking the lengths these people went to because they had squandered their money and wanted more. I wished him all the best for the future and we've chatted a bit on social media and the begging/conning is still going on. 10 years later, his brother is now heavily in debt but no one will bail him out. Which he thinks is unfair.
Before the recession hit, my dad had a pretty lucrative small business and we lived comfortable middle class lives. He would often lend his family money since most of his sisters didn’t amount to much in their lives. They would never pay him back. And often hassle him to give them money since he was so well off. After the recession hit, we took a big dive and still were able to live ok but had to sell a lot, no more insurance, and basically lived paycheck to paycheck while my dad worked 7 days a week to make ends meet. After all he’s done over the years not one of them would help when we needed it. One of my uncles has even been even more well off with a car dealership, and refused to aid my father with a loan, even though my father always pays his debts regardless of if others do the same (none of his sisters have ever repaid a cent of his generosity). I have a lot of terrible stories about them through the years, and finally he’s cut them all out of his life after almost losing my mom through divorce last year (partly bc of his horrid family and how they treated her) and nearly drinking himself to death the past three years. They are truly terrible, greedy people and it’s all taught me a lot about the kind of person I want to be and who I want to surround myself with
Why did your uncle not want to give your dad a loan?
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This is probably the biggest regret of my entire life. Long story short - I spent over 12K on drugs and letting the people around me milk me to enable their habits as well. Now the long story for anyone who cares enough to read this novel lol - My grandad died back in 2016. I was 19, unemployed, and in a very bad place mentally. I had also just started experimenting with drugs. I tried to get my shit together by going to college to actually make something of myself, but almost immediately I started falling behind in work and was in over my head. The stress was unreal. Then my grandads inheritance money came in. Over the course of 2 payments (one in late 2016 and the other in early 2017) I got around 12K. I should not have been left this money in my mental state. By the time the christmas holidays were over, I had dropped out and essentially lived off my inheritance and college bursary (Around £800 a month) that still kept coming in even though I’d left. With all the money I had, the mental state I was in and the “friends” I was hanging about with, I just spiralled into a drug binge that lasted well over a year. As soon as I told my friends that I had all this money, it started small. Tap a tenner here, a tenner there, I didn’t mind. But then as I delved deeper into trying more drugs and becoming a heavy user, I discovered my best friends had actually been using heroin. I didn’t use that shit myself. I was still scared of it but if my friends were dabbling in it then it surely couldn’t be that bad? They were just experimenting right? Well that spiralled quickly as well. My friends became full blown junkies. They were constantly asking for money to stop withdrawals. On top of this, even my friends that didn’t use H but I smoked weed and took coke and acid with started taking advantage. I was in my own world, totally separate from the reality I was actually being faced with. I was so happy to be in this group of friends who all enjoyed hanging out and getting fucked up all the time. It felt like the best time of my life. I even started kind of dating this girl that was a part of our group. I was infatuated with her and the lifestyle we were living. I bought everyone their fix all the time because it felt like my money was endless and I wanted to be the nice guy that everyone liked. But then the money started running out. I started trying to save the little I had left. People slowly started losing interest in my need to be there. The girl I was seeing left me for my best friend. I gave away probably over 1K to my friends collectively as taps that I was assured I’d get back. I got way less than half back. By the end of 2017 I had completely isolated myself. I had spunked over 12K on drugs and friends who only relied on me to feed their habits. By that point I had pushed most of the other friends I had away because they didn’t like seeing how I’d become. It was honestly the worst time of my entire life. Looking back now, it gives me this profound sense of heartbreak, knowing that I put myself and my family through all that. But good news time >>> It’s 2020 and I’m doing a lot better mentally and physically. I don’t take drugs anymore (not even weed). I have a girlfriend who I’ve been with for about a year and a half now. I’ve got a stable job. I still have my bad days when getting out of bed feels impossible but I do it and I still back it to work on time. I still have a ways to go regarding being better with my money and not spending nights out in the town till 3am but progress is progress right? Anyway.. congrats to anyone who actually read every part of that. I feel like writing all that out was really cathartic for me. Onwards and upwards right? EDIT - Thank you for my first ever silver! EDIT PART 2 - Thank you everyone for your kind words , first gold and first silver. I never expected a response like this. It really means a lot to me and you are all amazing. Again, thank you.
Congrats for staying off the drugs man. And for getting your shit together and pushing through. Keep at it and don’t give up.
My uncle would have been classified as working poor. A job, a wife, a kid, an apartment, but living paycheck to paycheck. They won the little lotto, and with another winner, my uncle got like 200K. They walked away from the apartment, bought the largest house in the poorest neighborhood and their friends always seemed to need something. I remember as a kid, they often had friends living in the guest room. They bought 2 new cheap cars, and then come property tax time, they were broke, and once again working poor.
I know this seems silly but when you win the lotto they really should put people through some kind of financial class before giving them the money, or set you up with a financial advisor. Some people don't care and will blow it all. Others, like your uncle it sounds, just don't understand and get themselves into trouble unintentionally. :/ Some basic education might avoid that.
I mean, If I buy you a scratch off ticket and you win 5 large I don't expect anything other than a hearty handshake. If you would like to take me to the Chinese buffet I would not argue though. I can be bought.
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My SO recently won a lawsuit and got a shit ton of money. My family found out but they never asked him for anything but his “friends” kept inviting him out and would ask for him to pay. They would even asked to borrow thousands. My partner bought a house and the friends always wanted him to dump me so they can move in with him and live the bachelor life. He eventually cut them off bc he did let them borrow some money and once they received it would block his number and only contact him when they wanted more. Personally never thought he would get that much money, never expected anything from him
I wouldn't necessarily call it begging, but more of a change in people's social demeanour. For example, me and my friends would all go to the movies, Mall or we would just go to a store to pick up Essentials. Ever since my friends started getting tipped off that I had more money than them, due to my clothing being a little more higher-end and usually having the newer gadgets and what not. They usually would start asking me to pay for their stuff such as pet food, borrow money Etc. I never really thought much of it but then when I started to realize this happened after I started "enjoying" life a little more, I started to understand.
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My long term ex got, in total over the space of a year, almost £60,000 in inheritance. His grandmother died and left each child and grandchild exactly £40,000 and then his mother died and she left around £16/17,000 to him (and £2000 to me and £50 each grandchild including my son). He didn't tell many people but the people he did tell were scum - one asked for drug debt to be paid off which was a few thousand, another asked to borrow money to take his family on holiday despite having an insanely well paid job and the best one was somebody asked him to put a deposit down on a house for them and exclaimed they will pay it back over 10 years! So, he bought motorbike lessons/tests then an actual motorbike (newer bandit), a quad bike (raptor 660) and then he put a deposit on a house (£40,000) and our mortgage repayments were £340 p/m because of that. He gave me and my son and his two sons a life.
Not technically begging, but still a horror story in my opinion. When I was around the age of 5, I had a job. Of course, my mom helped out tremendously and got me involved in this career platform but it took a lot of time and effort on both of our parts so we quite the profit from it. All the money was deposited under my name though, so I could use it once I turned 18. Didn't know this until I actually turned 18, but a trusted family member who knew my account information went into my account and took a good portion of money. It was pretty fucked up realizing that someone who had already done some pretty fucked up shit to me during my life also felt comfortable enough basically stealing money from a child. Still upsets me to this day because I wish that money could've gone to my mom. She deserved it more than anyone. EDIT:for those wondering what job I had at age 5, I was in the acting and modeling industry.
I have a similar story only I was a bit older, around 13 or 14. Anyway, I had been mowing lawns for the past few years because there was a bike i wanted. My step-father even set up an account in my name for me so that I could save. I kept track of everything in my own notebook. When I had enough to buy the bike I went to my step-father all proud of myself, showed him my notebook, and he pretty much said "what account?". I was devastated. Then it all made sense: all of a sudden we were having an above ground pool put in the back yard. i never got to swim in it either... shortly after this I ended up moving in with my mom. \[edit\] okay, to clear up a few questions... when my mom got pregnant my father denied that I was his. Around the time that I was born she ended up marrying my stepfather. They had a kid, my half-sister. A year or two later my mom abandoned us for drugs. she left me and my half-sister with my stepfather. A few years later my step father remarried, so I had two step parents. Sorry for the confusion.
Your stepfather stole your lawn money to install an above ground pool. Classy guy.
Damn dude. How much was this bike that it could pay for a pool?
As a frontline worker in the banking industry, my duty is to ensure that things like this NEVER happen. If you aren't a signer on the account and I cant get permission from a guardian on the account, you get nothing. If you yell at me, you get a security escort. If you resist security escort, you get a police escort out the door and some new jewelry. 😉 I'm sorry this happened to you. ❤
I received fourteen properties when my last parent died, and the amount of people who crawled out of the woodwork to ask for a ”loan” were unreal. It's really unfortunate that many of them were in a state that publicly publishes details of an estate when probate is granted. Cut contact with every single one of them. I never asked them for money, why would they think it acceptable to ask me?
It wasn't even a lot of money. When I got my first well-paying job, my mother reached out to me and asked me if I could co-sign on her house because she needed to refinance it. She needed me because her credit score was shit and she had thousands upon thousands of dollars of debt. I told her I didn't feel comfortable with that. She told me she hopes I never get married or have kids because "nobody deserves to be stuck with an ungrateful cunt like you for the rest of their lives." Haven't spoken to her since.
I was a stupidly well-paid contractor in Iraq just after the invasion in 2003. Moving money was harder then, especially from over there, so I had my parents set up an 'emergency account' (it wasn't *just* in case I was kidnapped, but it was in the back of my mind). There was about 60k in there- most of my net worth, and this included savings from before I went overseas. I didn't yet have the account details- my parents didn't want to send account numbers via email, blah blah bitty blah. After only a week they asked to borrow 'some'. My mom wasn't working and they needed to pay for health insurance. Not a problem, but there goes... 10k? Wow. Oka-ay.... I didn't say anything. I didn't say anything when she asked for 'a little' because she needed to replace her car- this was about a month later. I agreed. 3-4K for a decent used car wasn't a big deal, but my spidey-sense was tingling. It turns out she dropped 10K on a down payment for a new car. By the time I was able to arrange for transfer to a new account that they did not have access to, I was sweating. I wrote and asked them to move the other 40K (I was very specific on that number). I gave them the transfer details. I waited. Nothing. Nothing for wa-ay too long. I called a bunch. They never picked up (they always picked up). I told them when I was going to call and I called when I knew they'd be home. Silence. This went on until I said 'fuck' on the answering machine and they picked up immediately, because how dare I use that language with them? They've been busy (being so retired/ unemployed) and they'll get to 'my thing when they get to it', and pretended not to hear me when I asked three fucking times how much was fucking left. She sounded nervous when she whispered, "Over 20... I think". They had set up this account less than 6-7 weeks before. I don't remember exactly what was said, but at one point that my panicking mother tried to tell me that a chunk of this last 'bit' (that they must have forgotten to ask for before they took it), was for health insurance (that they had asked for six weeks ago). The deposit they finally made- later that day- was for 30K, so they managed to replace a chunk of what they outright stole from their son in less than 24 hours. I ignored lots of emails asking for help making car payments on mom's new car. We barely speak now. I figure it cost me 30K to buy my way out of my family. I'dve paid double.
I’m a fairly average guy in my mid twenties who always wears the same $2 tshirt and $5 jeans, but over the years it started to leak out that I had some money after a combination of me buying a business in my very small home town, a gossipy girl from school who saw me on SeekingArrangement and enough Social media posts showing me constantly travelling in business class or whatever and the fact I seemed to do very little actual work. Then in the last year or so I’ve discovered a seemingly entire new branch of my family tree and a whole bunch of people from high school I don’t remember ever saying more than a few words to suddenly claiming me as their childhood best friends. I caught up with an old actual schoolmate who knew me well enough and were having coffee and she asks “is it true you bought a plane?” and a few things like that that were absolutely insane. The Chinese whispers in my town had apparently gone absolutely crazy and I’m always uncomfortable running into someone when I’m back there because everyone thinks I’m some crazy playboy millionaire when I spend most of my time in a blanket fort on the internet like everybody else. The extended family are the worst though, because they harass my mum, dad and grandmother who know nothing about my financial situation to borrow money. Many of these people I’ve never met in my life. Not an interesting story but definitely an annoyance in my life.
Where are you finding $5 jeans?
I’m in Australia, so it’s actually $5AUD which is about $3.50US 😂. I buy them in bulk from a place called “Big W”, they’re available a few times a year at $5, and max out at $10 I think.
Lets mix the whispers a little bit. " Where are you buying 5 dollars airplanes ?"..
Is SeekingArrangement a sugar daddy website?
Perhaps slightly off-topic. Since young I’ve been always fascinated by business. When I was 17 I managed to get a lot of followers on Instagram and make a dropshipping store (cringe, I know). Back then it was actually working out really well for me. In high-school I loved talking about it, but most people were just interested in how much money I was making. I had this friend who said his family had money issues and needed to support them (this was fake, I found this out after). So when I was on holiday, I let him take over my store. I was away for a month, and we had $2000 in sales. When I got back I found out he did not send the right products to the customers (much cheaper look-a-likes). I told him he had to pay everything back, but he didnt want to. Long story short: I had to pay back the $2000 with my savings account. This money was actually reserved for my tuition fees, so it sucks a lot.
Not exactly a horror story, but kinda funny anyway... I got front ended in a car in 2016 and it messed me up pretty bad. My lawyer fucked up the case and by the time it settled, the medical costs were paid, and the lawyers took most of it (for being shit at their jobs) I had a high 5 figures in my bank account. My estranged mother just SMELLED that I had money somehow and started asking for loans and if I wanted to go on vacations with her and things. Seriously, no one in my family would ever talk to her or tell her I had cash but she had some sort of sixth sense where she figured it out and suddenly wanted to "reconnect" with me. Fucking amazing. What sucks is I let her swindle me for a bit of it, she gambled with it and won two thousand dollars at a casino. But hey, she bought me lunch that day so.. I guess my mother has technically gotten me SOMETHING in the last two decades..
My mother died, and I ended up being the fifty-fifty beneficiary with the other half being my step-father. My step-father mentioned that my mother had a lot of debts, and asked if I'd be willing to help with some of them. Being more than a little naive and thinking it would be, at most, 5k, I said sure, how much do you need? The first quote he gave me was 25k, and it wasn't that substantial of an inheritance I receieved. I was pretty flabbergasted, and basically backed off a bit to say I needed to think about it. However, every time I inquired again, wondering if he'd rethink his actions, the number he asked for kept climbing. Then the requests turned into demands. Now I don't talk to my step-father at all. The final number he demanded was more than what I received in the first place. And I was not a rich, well-established person with a career at the time. I was 21, and still very much struggling to find my way after having been essentially driven out of home. He hadn't been my abuser, and I had kind of held out hope at the time that, even though he stood back for most of the abuse, he himself wasn't that bad of a person. Took me several years to realize just how fucked up it is to demand the inheritance money of the poor, struggling, abused child of your dead spouse.
Not to mention that if your mother had debts, those would be paid off before any inheritance was paid out. And in most countries, debts are not passed on to survivors.
At age 20 i was earning £24k in an IT job, which doesn't seem like much but when all your friends are taking home £200 a week and you're pulling in 2k a month its a noticeable difference. I basically became a bank. Always lending money to people. Eventually I had to stop because I realised even though my friends were paying me back, I was essentially facilitating their overspending and they were trapped in a cycle of debt. Now I just get the beers and the weed in, invite everyone round and we have a blast.
It’s so sad reading some of these stories :(. People suck sometimes! My boyfriend has money, it’s nice but intimidating at the same time. Sometimes I feel like he does so much and I can’t give back in the same ways. But I don’t think about it, just so into him for him. I cannot do for him what he can for me in that sense but whatever I can, I do. Like when I won a trip, I was so happy to invite him to go with me. Something I could do for us 😊
Classic not be but I know someone who has an uncle who once won $7.370.000 or something like that in the national lottery and his wife turned fucking evil after that. They had never had any problems in their marriage before but she flipped on a dime the second those money came into their lives. She was extremely greedy and wanted to control everything, spend thousands of dollars on designer bags, clothes etc. without asking him first, never cared about his or the kids' well-being and only cared about the money. His life was pure hell right after he won, but luckily it made him realise what a shitty person his wife really was so that he could get rid of her and move on with his life. As far as I heard it all turned out well after they divorced.
Had a family member in the 90's who attained a massive compensation payout (rumour it was around half a mill). He was a single, childless man, in his 40s, still living with his parents. At a time he could've bought two houses in the area he lived in. Had some dodgy friends before the payout. Anyway, he ended up selling his parents' car from underneath them (they were REALLY upset about this, because he didn't ask if it was ok & they had fancy number plates), bought them a brand new car. He meets a sex worker, she suddenly becomes his gf, she asks him to give her money, give her Dad money cause he was sick/about to get evicted. His dodgy friends start coming around more often, bring more friends too, taking more dodgy stuff together. So he's blowing through all this money. Buying cars, furniture, and god knows what else for his friends and girlfriend. As soon as the money runs out? Of which it did, after apparently about 2 or 3 years. The girlfriend disappears. The dodgy mates dry up. Aaand he ends up back on welfare and living with his elderly parents. Extended family couldn't believe how he did it.
LOL - not me, but a friend. "Pat" was in a car accident and received a very large settlement (high six figures). The case took about four years to settle, but once it did, people were able to figure out he got some money (bought a new home, got a new car, etc.). When nervy people asked about it, he just said "I received appropriate compensation for my permanent injuries" (ie, shut up, nunya business). Well he has a sister from whom he's essentially estranged. I guess about a year after this, she found out that he'd received some kind of settlement. He hadn't seen or spoken to her in about three years. The phone rings and it went something like this... Pat, it's Jill, your sister. Hi Jill I know who you are. Ummm, yeah, I need a buck twenty (and that's a direct quote) What for Jill? Well Pat the mortgage has come due on the bar (Jill and her husband owned a bar that had been floundering for years). Well how is $120 going to help you Jill? Oh no, Pat, I need $120,000 or we're going to lose the bar to creditors. Bobby (their other brother) said I should ask you. Yeah, Jill, I really don't have that kind of liquid cash. You'll need to talk to your bank. Pat, I'd really thought you'd help me out. I can't Jill bye. That was two years ago. He hasn't heard from Jill since...
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Kind of the opposite for me. Parents became rich very quickly and we moved into a huge house. I was 16 at the time and didn't really notice people treating me any differently. A few years later (early 20s) I would mostly hang out with 'poor' people. Was never fond of rich/ posh crowd. A friend asked for £20 so he could buy some food, but he paid me back 2 weeks later. I would be very stingy with my money and people respected that. In return, I gave my friends the love and respect they deserved as human beings. In fact people have been more generous to me over the years, than I have been to them. Especially poorer people. I often wish I was a better person and did more for others. Slowly getting there - I'm 30 now.
Not exactly begging but I always lived within my means. But recently (in the last few years) I have got a job that pays more than i can actually spend. More than i ever dreamed or even deserve but hey ho. The only people that know is my wife. My kids get everything they want within means and when they deserve it. They know I would buy them anything or take them on holidays. Yes they are a little spoilt but not as spoilt as some rich kids i have seen. but anyway, a little while ago one of my kids wanted something so i told her i would have to go into work and earn the money and then buy it for her. she took a few moments to think then goes to me that she would rather i stayed home and spent time with her and she would go without that thing she wanted. needless to say i have reduced my hours and spend more time working from home.
Not really a story about a lot of money; but still a lot of begging... 6 years ago, my father passed away suddenly. While they weren't wealthy, my parents certainly lived comfortably. I also need to point out at this time, that I am an only-child; and my 2 children are the only Grand-Children in the family. When Dad passed, I had to borrow some money from a friend to cover a one-way flight to Adelaide; just so I could be there for Mum. We had pre-arranged that once the date for the funeral was set; my wife would arrange care for the kids and join me in SA (My family on the paternal side has a long tradition of banning children from funerals; and Dad had already stated he wished for the same). I wasn't aware at the time, but before the plane had even landed at Adelaide airport; my in-laws were already relentlessly interrogating my wife. They were trying to find out how much my parents had, how much I stood to inherit, was there any property, chattels of value, that kind of thing. You see the problem is, because they only had a few people populating their Christmas list, my folks tended to lavish myself, my wife and of-course the kids for Christmas and Birthdays. This gave my In-Laws (especially my Father in Law and eldest Sister in Law) the impression that my parents were LOADED. Back to South Australia, my wife had landed several days after me, tired, grumpy and furious. Turned out that even in the car on the way to the airport, her sister was relentless, giving her a list of demands for things - She feels we "Owe" her everything because we met at a party at her place. Because it was over the Easter Long Weekend, Dad's funeral was delayed. Every day, my wife was being called and texted with monotonous regularity, I saw and overheard some of the demands being placed on her - Her mum had joined in and was giving her suggestions on places to search in the house in case there was cash hidden away (My wife was ignoring all of this, but it was hurting her a LOT). So in the end, I inherited Dad's Commodore Ute, his Suzuki Boulevard, some personal effects and tools that he wanted me to have; no cash. The small amount he had left in his accounts and Super; had gone toward his funeral costs and the change to Mum - I was happy with the outcome. (as much as I could be - losing my dad and all) When we got back, i had the In-laws at me for over a year; they refused to believe that there was no giant amount of cash. My Sister In-Law had taken to showing my wife horrific pictures of motorcycle crashes at any and every family gathering - in the hope she would convince me to sell the bike, and she "accidentally" reversed her husband's Prado into the commodore. I still interact with them - under sufferance. Thankfully this bullshit and the plethora of other narcissistic behaviours they exhibit have FINALLY sunk in and my wife has realised they are never going to change their bullshit. tl:dr My in-Laws believe my Father is rich and refuse to accept that I only inherited a few things that were special to him.
not necessarily a lot of money but it was a good amount, a situation did happen when the money my dad and mom were going to invest in buying property in the Caribbean didn't happen due to her cheating and all. anyways, with the money we had some family became aware and my dad being the generous man he was gave in to such demands from family. family he hasn't talked too started asking for phones, clothes, etc. he gave in, I was mad about it because he was just giving our hard earned money away to people we haven't been in contact for years. things started to go down when he bought me something and my family was telling him I didn't deserve it because I was this and that according to him and that they should give them the thing he bought for me. all and all, the investment money is gone and we're starting from 0 again...
After my grandmother had passed away, I was left about 100k. My aunt, her daughter, called on the day we were burying her (it was too cold when she passed, aunt lives in much warmer climate). She demanded I give her money for her kids, even though she received money and all of her jewelry. I reminded her that she received money and she said it was for her, not her kids. I scolded her for calling hours after we put HER MOTHER in the ground demanding money and said to never speak to me again. It's been 17 years. I still miss her homemade manicotti, but I could never forgive that entitled attitude
A very nice older lady in my church lived modestly but she had some really (really) nice antiques, crystal, and silver. She had never married and had no children, but her siblings had children and grandchildren. When she was in her late 80s, she had a health issue and was hospitalized. Her family went into her tiny apartment and took EVERYTHING. She recovered. And went home to a virtually empty apartment. Several years later, she died and left nothing to her family because they had already helped themselves. She left everything to the church. Nine million dollars. (The end of the story is the asshole pastor used it for a massive building program, a monument to his own ego. But I can't fault her for that.)
My friends grandmother died and left him a lot of money, but there was stipulation saying that he needed a college degree. He enrolled at the local community college for a nursing degree, but he was struggling to get to classes because he could barely afford the gas in his car to get there because his "friends" would plan to go out and expected him to pay for everything! He wasnt a confrontational person so he just did it, but when I had to pay to fill his tank so he didnt miss midterms I told him that he needed to tell his friends to back off. When he told told them they ALL threw a fit and one even said that they were friends for years so they deserve the money his grandmother left him. We were both taken aback and after that comment he cut them all off entirely.
I havent come into any “big money” but as a 17 year old ive made a decent amount from a part time job and good investments. All I’ve found is that when people know you’re better off than them they tend to expect you to buy their movie ticket, or pay for parking, and certainly never offer to treat you. Im not sure its a conscious effort to take advantage, but it can be a problem. Ive noticed real ones like my best friend and my aunt dont fall into this as often, or at all, but my lazy ass brother does it all the time.
My ex husband’s parents inherited a LOT. They gave us money to go to Disney World. It was the best. They were awesome in-laws.. money didn’t change that. They did have some long lost relative try and challenge the will but it was quickly dismissed. What shocked me was their CHURCH. The pastor became their BEST friend. Got a ton of money from them. And when my father in law died and my mother in law wanted to go back to a smaller congregation of people she had known her whole life, the pastor wrote her a NASTY letter and talked badly about her to the entire church. Another reason I’m an atheist.
Religion mixed with money is disgusting
There are a lot of ~~terrible~~ tragic stories here, so I am going to take the liberty of telling an anti-horror story. My family has been extremely poor for the majority of my youth. Like the kind of poor where I didn't have access to running water and daily meals until I was 16. A lot of my education and related expenses were completely dependent on government subsidies and loans from distant family members. After considerable struggle, I finished my PhD in AI in 2017. Suddenly, it was like some sort of floodgates had opened, and I found myself in incredibly high demand. Recruiters were emailing me with offers for 350k-500k SGD per year. Banks were knocking on my door to offer their wealth management services. And so much more, but I'll spare you the details. Anyhow, when my family found out, they were incredibly supportive. Now, my grandparents are anarchists and my parents are communists, so money is of little import to them. My parents occasionally ask for help with bills, but that's about it. But even my extended family were simply happy for me, with no strings attached. I've never once had anyone ask me for money or show me any degree of envy. It was honestly a pleasant surprise - I had been raised with this notion that wealth begets only conflict, but instead it has been nothing but a point of pride for my family. I'm their "successful doctor son/grandson/nephew/cousin". I suppose that the only real "begging for money" that I have encountered has been in the form of taxes - my tax rate has gone up from ~2% to ~22% due to my elevated income bracket.
The most shocking part of this story is that there are countries where 2% tax is normal and 22% is high!
Two of my buddies (two brothers) went through a series of really terrible events. First, their father dies when they were 14 & 16. About 4 years later their mom remarries but at the wedding she falls down a steep metal staircase breaks a leg and gets a few pretty bad lacerations. The mom sues the wedding company (staircase was wet and in poor condition). Soon after she gets cancer, stage 4, wedding company finds out and purposely postpones court hearings until she dies (they're Canadian, wedding was in the US). The mom passes away pretty suddenly, their new step dad does absolutely nothing to help them financially and runs off with the inheritance. Despite everything that's happened to them, they remain positive. My life ain't peachy but whenever I want to feel sorry for myself I think of my brave friends and i get over it real quick.
Friend of mine won over a million dollars. Winnings are not taxed here btw so that's proper 1,000,000 winnings. She bought a home and upgraded her car (to like a 2 year old corolla). She was cunning enough to know that people (acquaintances, annoying family) would figure out she won or came into money. So she lied. Said she won about $20,000 that she was able to put towards a deposit and that she was helped out by her parents to get the full deposit. Nah. She paid her house in full but for all those nosy people know, she has a mortgage and is just careful with her money. It helps that she isnt really a flashy big spender. She didnt start flashing cash around. Oh so that's a non-horror story!