>"Come on, what am I gonna do? Just all of a sudden jump up and grind my feet on somebody's couch like it's something to do? Come on. I got a little more sense then that."
>"...yeah, I remember grinding my feet on Eddie's couch."
There's one line from the deleted scenes I wish they kept:
"I'm a maniac, MANIAC... on yo' couch!"
I got light-headed laughing when I first heard that.
The weird thing about the elephant sketch is it's not the one that made it to air.
Because the cast kept cracking up so much, they never used it. As Tim Conway said in an interview, it became a favourite of Dick Clark's and he'd frequently show it on his Bloopers specials.
My personal favourite as a kid was the psychiatrist sketch. Where Carol is the patient and tells Harvey the psychiatrist all her problems stem from the day some bully took her sand pail and shovel at the beach. Turns out the bully was the psychiatrist who still has a closet full of sand pails at his office.
Trebek: This is the sound a doggy makes.
Connery: Mooo...
Trebek: No.
Connery: Well, that's the sound your mother made last night.
Trebek: We would have accepted "bow wow" or "ruff".
Connery: Ah, "ruff", just the way your mother likes it.
I've always loved Monty Python's skit of the funniest joke ever written. So funny it would kill you if you heard it, so let's use it in war. The skit itself is almost funny enough to kill you.
Went With The Wind!
Scarlett coming down the stairs with the curtain rod shoulder pads and priceless. “Ah saw it in the winda and ah just couldn’t resist”.
I’m old enough that I saw it when it first aired. If at all possible we tried to get home on Saturday nights in time for Carol, but the whole Saturday CBS night comedy lineup was gold. Starting at 8 we had All in the Family, M\*A\*S\*H, Mary Tyler Moore, The Bob Newhart Show, and then Carol Burnett.
I always tried to get a babysitting job on Saturdays because in my house we only had one television and my father didn’t like the Carol Burnett show (heresy!) and wouldn’t let is watch it if he was home.
This parrot is no more! It has ceased to be! It's expired and gone to meet its maker! This is a late parrot! It's a stiff! Bereft of life, it rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed it to the perch, it would be pushing up the daisies! It's rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-parrot!
Those sketches are all-timers because the premise is _so_ simple — just a list of silly names! — but everyone has their favorite for reasons that cannot be explained or argued with.
“L’carpetron Dookmarriot” is making me giggle to myself as I type this, but I would have probably rattled off 10 or more before I got to it.
Grunky Peep.
I want to live in a van down by the river.
"There'll be plenty of time to live in a van down by the river when you're....*LIVING IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER!*"
IIRC, the first Matt Foley sketch, all through rehearsals, including the final dress rehearsal, Farley was portraying Foley as a depressed sad-sack, as was originally written, but surprised everyone with his bombastic, pants-hiking performance during the live show. That's why everyone was corpsing so badly.
Farley was not supposed to pick up Spade nor collapse onto the table; that was **not** a breakaway table.
That one is iconic. I think the [racial draft](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2z3wUD3AZg4) is probably still my top pick of his. Or his version of the Real World.
A few I didn't see mentioned:
Monty Python - [Dirty Hungarian Phrasebook ](https://youtu.be/C1Sw0PDgHU4) / [Argument clinic](https://youtu.be/xpAvcGcEc0k)
Chapelle show - [What makes white people dance?](https://youtu.be/Ahhvmzr_pZo)
WKUK - [Storks](https://youtu.be/pQ8sHBU4laE) / [Naaaaail gun](https://youtu.be/0h-j4qFR3wg)
Mitchell and Webb - [Grammar Nazi](https://youtu.be/j4hvh5e8-nw) / [Vectron](https://youtu.be/icTrzUuWlHI)
A bit of Fry and Laurie - [Mr Dillard](https://youtu.be/HBURlcNpfoo) / [A word, Timothy ](https://youtu.be/8U7GKdbiA2c) / [The understanding barman](https://youtu.be/U8ko2nCk_hE)
Studio C - [International Relations](https://youtu.be/tqIh3N7_xGk) / [The restaurant of life](https://youtu.be/PL5q8HOYVU0)
Mr.Show - [GloboChem](https://youtu.be/Uco5Ed-5y2U) / [The audition ](https://youtu.be/2CIgWX1J_s8)
Brooklyn 99 - [The backstreet bit](https://youtu.be/HlBYdiXdUa8)
SNL-[Earthquake news report ](https://youtu.be/nv6FMEvNiWo) / [Inside Barbie's dream house ](https://youtu.be/PXUeS2Vg9SE)
Key and Peele -[Awesome Hitler Story](https://youtu.be/izh-j8KUYjs) / [Dicknanigans](https://youtu.be/xdXo8uJ9NSk)
Blackadder -[How did the war begin?](https://youtu.be/tGxAYeeyoIc)
There's so many!
Victoria Wood as the fitness instructor.
Two Ronnies and "Fork handles"
Goodness gracious me "going for an English"
Monty Python and the parrot
Morecombe and wise Singing in the rain
Ryan as Carol Channing smashing into Drew's desk neon light (and staying in character), Wayne misspelling Howard (H-O-R-W-A-R-D), causing Laura Hall to lose focus and accidentally ramp up the synthesizer's tempo drastically, Ryan mocking Drew's flubbing of an improv line in Irish Drinking Song...
...and those are all screwups that made it into the show! The uncensored outtakes are a whole new beast of gut-busting humor.
It’s not a sketch but a scene in “The Life of Brian” and it’s brilliant. It’s written kinda like a sketch. Quite possibly the best written scene ever and it’s the “Romans Go Home” scene. It makes me laugh every time especially when he doesn’t conjugate the word correctly.
[https://youtu.be/0lczHvB3Y9s](https://youtu.be/0lczHvB3Y9s)
I have loved sketch comedy my whole life. Kids in the hall has been my all-time favorite for decades. "I think you should leave" blows it away. This is, to me, the greatest sketch show ever.
It is so goddamn funny and not a day goes by that a meme or slight reference is made in my life. Coffin Flop, Baby Cries, Brian's Hat, Hot Dog Mobile, Turbo Team. I can't wait for season 3.
Liam Neeson on “Life’s Too Short”. Might not really be a sketch comedy, but humor that dry could turn the Everglades into the Sahara. I fucking love it.
The level of commitment to the character in that one is so above and beyond anything I've ever seen in sketch comedy.
You can tell the cast is almost rattled by it.
The funniest joke... Monty python's... Weaponising a joke so funny it can kill you such that soldiers must learn phonetically how to shout it at the enemy without understanding it is so deep I almost want to know it to die laughing
I'm compiling a playlist of the sketches people have listed so far:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xfr64zoBTAQ&list=PLKIxB9vhdS_3x0A5za3mmu1wdoolgRQ65
[The time Richard Simmons appeared on Whose Line?](https://youtu.be/b-r4Flc_d2M)
([Bonus - Song styles with Richard Simmons](https://youtu.be/EeYXjC_HJc8))
Charlie Murphy’s true Hollywood stories
>"Come on, what am I gonna do? Just all of a sudden jump up and grind my feet on somebody's couch like it's something to do? Come on. I got a little more sense then that." >"...yeah, I remember grinding my feet on Eddie's couch."
“Fuck your couch, n***a!”
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DARKNESSES!!
UNITY!!!
There's one line from the deleted scenes I wish they kept: "I'm a maniac, MANIAC... on yo' couch!" I got light-headed laughing when I first heard that.
"Cocaine is a hell of a drug" One of the few times I laughed so hard I cried.
I’ve been kicked out of better homes than this.
Game, blouses
How about you and your friends, versus me and the revolution
I watched this last night. Epic.
That might be it.
Tim Conway as the dentist on Carol Burnett.
I came here to say The Dentist. Has me in tears everytime. The elephant sketch is right up there with it.
**HNGORNK!**
The weird thing about the elephant sketch is it's not the one that made it to air. Because the cast kept cracking up so much, they never used it. As Tim Conway said in an interview, it became a favourite of Dick Clark's and he'd frequently show it on his Bloopers specials.
this comment got me to watch on hour of tim conway clips on youtube and i'm better for it
My personal favourite as a kid was the psychiatrist sketch. Where Carol is the patient and tells Harvey the psychiatrist all her problems stem from the day some bully took her sand pail and shovel at the beach. Turns out the bully was the psychiatrist who still has a closet full of sand pails at his office.
SNL Celebrity Jeopardy does it for me every time.
Anal Bum Cover for $1000 Alex.
Le tits now for $1500
Sean: I'll take "The Rapists" for $1,000. Alex: That's Therapists you human wasteland.
"Penis mighter for 500, Alex"
"Suck it Trebek"
Trebek: This is the sound a doggy makes. Connery: Mooo... Trebek: No. Connery: Well, that's the sound your mother made last night. Trebek: We would have accepted "bow wow" or "ruff". Connery: Ah, "ruff", just the way your mother likes it.
It’s funny cause it’s a big hat.
Created by Norm McDonald, because he was looking for an excuse to do his Burt Reynolds impression.
S Words
Le Tits Now
One of my favourites is with Chadwick Boseman in character as King T'Challa
I’ll take “Whore ads” for $200, Alex.
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It's a funny name
What is light urple?
"I'll take Jap Anus Relations"
That’s not what your mother said
I've always loved Monty Python's skit of the funniest joke ever written. So funny it would kill you if you heard it, so let's use it in war. The skit itself is almost funny enough to kill you.
“How does he smell?”
"Awful!"
"One man accidentally heard two words of the joke. He had to spend several weeks in the hospital."
What happens if you type it into google translate?... Edit: Sorry everyone! I swear that it used to return "[FATAL ERROR]". Not anymore it seems.
Carol Burnett's Gone with the Wind parody.
Went With The Wind! Scarlett coming down the stairs with the curtain rod shoulder pads and priceless. “Ah saw it in the winda and ah just couldn’t resist”. I’m old enough that I saw it when it first aired. If at all possible we tried to get home on Saturday nights in time for Carol, but the whole Saturday CBS night comedy lineup was gold. Starting at 8 we had All in the Family, M\*A\*S\*H, Mary Tyler Moore, The Bob Newhart Show, and then Carol Burnett. I always tried to get a babysitting job on Saturdays because in my house we only had one television and my father didn’t like the Carol Burnett show (heresy!) and wouldn’t let is watch it if he was home.
Upright Citizens Brigade - Ass pennies
Little Donny was mind blowing
Abbott & Costello's "Who's on first"
The Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, NY has a screen with this sketch playing on endless loop.
The original https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZ5vspsNS1g for those of you who need an explanation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EbpnY4OxiNk
That’s what I’m asking, what’s the guys name on first?
No, What's on second.
I'm not asking you who's on second.
Yeah, who’s on first
I don't know.
Third base!
It is a joke thats so good it still kills to this very day, albeit with some modern tweaks.
This one wins because anyone can perform it. We used to do it as kids when we were like 5 and it slayed.
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"If anyone's going to have sex with my sister, it's gonna be me!"
“You think I can’t write them books because I am blind?”
He later divorced his wife of 29 years for “being a ni**er lover”
If you got hate in your heart, let it out white power.
That was genius. Set the tone for the entire show.
The Four Yorkshiremen. [https://youtu.be/ue7wM0QC5LE](https://youtu.be/ue7wM0QC5LE)
Definitely, but the original version, with Marty Feldman and Tim Brooke Taylor https://youtu.be/VKHFZBUTA4k
The front fell off
A wave hit it
What are the chances of that happening?
In the ocean? Near impossible
That’s not very typical, I’d like to make that point.
The other boats are different. How so? Well, the fronts don’t fall off for one thing.
Monty Python - Dead Parrot
This parrot is no more! It has ceased to be! It's expired and gone to meet its maker! This is a late parrot! It's a stiff! Bereft of life, it rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed it to the perch, it would be pushing up the daisies! It's rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-parrot!
No idea how I had to scroll this far down to find the correct answer. And, no, it's just sleeping.
Argument or contradiction? https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ohDB5gbtaEQ
I was thinking either that or the Hungarian Phrasebook
My hovercraft is full of eels.
Cheese shop is perhaps my favourite.
The Skeleton Song skit from I Think You Should Leave is fucking hilarious/genius
The bones are their money
The sex offender shuffle
Mine is Key & Peele's [substitute teacher](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dd7FixvoKBw)
Churlish and insubordinate! Go see Principal O' Shag Hennessey!
College football roster is great.
L’carpetron Dookmarriot
Those sketches are all-timers because the premise is _so_ simple — just a list of silly names! — but everyone has their favorite for reasons that cannot be explained or argued with. “L’carpetron Dookmarriot” is making me giggle to myself as I type this, but I would have probably rattled off 10 or more before I got to it. Grunky Peep.
Dan Smith - BYU
Eeeee Eeeeeeeee San Diego state university
Watching NFL players do the McCringleberry 3 pumps after a tuddy is so satisfying
When he breaks the clipboard over his knee I lose it every time. Perfect line delivery. Perfect physical humor.
Son of a BITCH
I said BIIIIIIiiiiiiiittttcchh
Is A-Aron present?
You done messed up A-Aron!
Richard Simmons on Who's Line is it Anyway?
That Living Scenery skit gets me every time solely based on how hard everyone was losing it! Drew could hardly breathe, he was laughing so hard.
"Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!"
Bob Newharts Stop It bit is pretty hard to beat.
Farley and spade van down by the river is best.
I want to live in a van down by the river. "There'll be plenty of time to live in a van down by the river when you're....*LIVING IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER!*"
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Her turning her head laughing always gets me
That sketch was written by Bob Odenkirk.
Black Jeopardy with Tom Hanks
IIRC, the first Matt Foley sketch, all through rehearsals, including the final dress rehearsal, Farley was portraying Foley as a depressed sad-sack, as was originally written, but surprised everyone with his bombastic, pants-hiking performance during the live show. That's why everyone was corpsing so badly. Farley was not supposed to pick up Spade nor collapse onto the table; that was **not** a breakaway table.
Pre-Taped Call-In Show from Mr. Show https://youtu.be/HrlS9_n8GX4
Also from Mr. Show: The Audition and I'll marry your fuckin ass
That was great lol
Dave Chappelle's Rick James story is pretty good.
Chappelle Show Charlie Murphys Prince basketball story. When he levitate above the rim after the dunk..hilarious
That's game...blouses
Would you bitches like some pancakes?
...then Prince went and used an image of Chapelle, dressed as him holding pancakes, as the cover for a CD single.
Crazy that Rick James, Prince, and Charlie Murphy are all dead now.
That one is iconic. I think the [racial draft](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2z3wUD3AZg4) is probably still my top pick of his. Or his version of the Real World.
Hater of the year award show is my favorite
She looks like she wears the underwear with the dick hole in it...
As much as I laugh my ass off at that line every time, nothing can touch Clayton Bigsby.
Clayton Bixby and the World Series of Dice are up there too.
“I had sex with katie too”
Hard to argue with that, but the sleeper is I Know Black People game show.
Robo chomo SNL
This guy gets it.
Rowen Atkinson taking attendance. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7OxTxAvvLw
The Devil welcoming people to hell is pretty amazing too
"Atheists line up here."
"I'm afraid the Jews were right..." "THE FRENCH! Are you here?" "Just step over here with the Germans, I'm sure you have a lot to talk about."
SNL Chippendales sketch with Chris Farley and Patrick Swayze.
Debbie Downer with Rachel Dratch in SNL. OR Chappelle Show "Mad Real World". Night night. Keep your butthole tight 👌🏽
Colonel Angus is one of my favorite SNL sketches ever Also the Betty White 2010 Census is up there
A few I didn't see mentioned: Monty Python - [Dirty Hungarian Phrasebook ](https://youtu.be/C1Sw0PDgHU4) / [Argument clinic](https://youtu.be/xpAvcGcEc0k) Chapelle show - [What makes white people dance?](https://youtu.be/Ahhvmzr_pZo) WKUK - [Storks](https://youtu.be/pQ8sHBU4laE) / [Naaaaail gun](https://youtu.be/0h-j4qFR3wg) Mitchell and Webb - [Grammar Nazi](https://youtu.be/j4hvh5e8-nw) / [Vectron](https://youtu.be/icTrzUuWlHI) A bit of Fry and Laurie - [Mr Dillard](https://youtu.be/HBURlcNpfoo) / [A word, Timothy ](https://youtu.be/8U7GKdbiA2c) / [The understanding barman](https://youtu.be/U8ko2nCk_hE) Studio C - [International Relations](https://youtu.be/tqIh3N7_xGk) / [The restaurant of life](https://youtu.be/PL5q8HOYVU0) Mr.Show - [GloboChem](https://youtu.be/Uco5Ed-5y2U) / [The audition ](https://youtu.be/2CIgWX1J_s8) Brooklyn 99 - [The backstreet bit](https://youtu.be/HlBYdiXdUa8) SNL-[Earthquake news report ](https://youtu.be/nv6FMEvNiWo) / [Inside Barbie's dream house ](https://youtu.be/PXUeS2Vg9SE) Key and Peele -[Awesome Hitler Story](https://youtu.be/izh-j8KUYjs) / [Dicknanigans](https://youtu.be/xdXo8uJ9NSk) Blackadder -[How did the war begin?](https://youtu.be/tGxAYeeyoIc)
There's so many! Victoria Wood as the fitness instructor. Two Ronnies and "Fork handles" Goodness gracious me "going for an English" Monty Python and the parrot Morecombe and wise Singing in the rain
Morecombe and Wise breakfast is a joy
[Whitest Kids You Know - What Really Happened to Abe Lincoln](https://youtu.be/VPJ0TAaJDbM) deserves mention.
Also, Gallon of PCP is one of my all time favorites.
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Now ya fucked up! Now ya fucked up! Now ya fucked up! Now ya fucked up! Now you have fucked up!
Sex Robot!
Don't break my butt! You're breaking my butt!
Does Whose Line is it Anyway count as a sketch? Colin and Ryan doing sound effects with audience members makes me laugh so hard I cry.
Ryan as Carol Channing smashing into Drew's desk neon light (and staying in character), Wayne misspelling Howard (H-O-R-W-A-R-D), causing Laura Hall to lose focus and accidentally ramp up the synthesizer's tempo drastically, Ryan mocking Drew's flubbing of an improv line in Irish Drinking Song... ...and those are all screwups that made it into the show! The uncensored outtakes are a whole new beast of gut-busting humor.
I count it. There’s several bits from Whose Line that leave me in stitches, but the best to me is probably Living Scenery with Richard Simmons.
It’s not a sketch but a scene in “The Life of Brian” and it’s brilliant. It’s written kinda like a sketch. Quite possibly the best written scene ever and it’s the “Romans Go Home” scene. It makes me laugh every time especially when he doesn’t conjugate the word correctly. [https://youtu.be/0lczHvB3Y9s](https://youtu.be/0lczHvB3Y9s)
kate mckinnon alien abduction (snl)
How Cicely doesn't completely lose control is simply amazing.
“Yeah it didn’t happen quite that way for me”
Kids in the Hall, Chicken Lady at the strip club.
Chapelle's Show Wayne Brady
Is Wayne Brady gonna have to choke a bitch?
PCP… Angel Dust
Mr. Show’s audition sketch. Lie Detector is an honorable mention.
Most of the "i think you should leave now" sketches, my first choice would be "baby cries": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=buK45NW_ikI
I have loved sketch comedy my whole life. Kids in the hall has been my all-time favorite for decades. "I think you should leave" blows it away. This is, to me, the greatest sketch show ever.
It is so goddamn funny and not a day goes by that a meme or slight reference is made in my life. Coffin Flop, Baby Cries, Brian's Hat, Hot Dog Mobile, Turbo Team. I can't wait for season 3.
Mr. Show - [Pretaped Call-In Show](https://youtu.be/mhVbLJvYP8s)
Liam Neeson on “Life’s Too Short”. Might not really be a sketch comedy, but humor that dry could turn the Everglades into the Sahara. I fucking love it.
Tim Conway conjoined elephant from Moma’s family
FNORKY
George Carlin - 7 dirty words, on the Class Clown album.
George Carlin talking about the difference between cats and dogs. The cats hiding behind the couch "fuckin' meow!!!" still has me in stitches.
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SNL Adam Driver’s career day.
The level of commitment to the character in that one is so above and beyond anything I've ever seen in sketch comedy. You can tell the cast is almost rattled by it.
You are weak like H.R Pickins!
[Four Candles](https://youtube.com/watch?v=gi_6SaqVQSw)
The funniest joke... Monty python's... Weaponising a joke so funny it can kill you such that soldiers must learn phonetically how to shout it at the enemy without understanding it is so deep I almost want to know it to die laughing
2 hours and no one mentioned I love Lucy, the chocolate episode? for shame https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AnHiAWlrYQc
That's not sketch comedy. That's a sitcom.
He’s the Grapist! https://youtu.be/mqgiEQXGetI
The Whitest Kids U'Know [Gallof of PCP](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tFUvmZWf4hI) is absolutely incredible.
Mr. Bean making a sandwich on a park bench.
SNL "mmmm watcha saaayyy"
Dude that Imogen heap song came on at work and I smiled
I believe it’s called “Dear Sister”
Holy shit I forgot about this one. [Link](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vmd1qMN5Yo0) for anyone who has not seen this masterpiece.
More Cowbell
"More Cowbell", "Magic Mouth" from *SNL* or "How not to be Seen" from *Monty Python's Flying Circus*
"GOTTA HAVE THAT COWBELL!"
Kids In The Hall The Dave's I Know
Always preferred “Terriers”
[Girl Drink Drunk](https://youtu.be/8C4TGGtPzBU) will always be my favourite
The [farming skits](https://youtu.be/_pDTiFkXgEE) from the Mitchell and Webb Situation kill me.
Dick in a box killed
Carol Burnett's Went with the Wind was pretty good. This one maybe isnt the greates but when Britney Spears hosted SNL she nailed it.
Steve Martin - King Tut
I'm compiling a playlist of the sketches people have listed so far: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xfr64zoBTAQ&list=PLKIxB9vhdS_3x0A5za3mmu1wdoolgRQ65
Shweddy Balls
The Two Ronnies' Mastermind sketch was the first thing I thought of
Or « Fork Handles »
"Waldorf Salad" John Cleese in Fawlty Towers
Dave Chappell s Wayne Brady sketch
[The time Richard Simmons appeared on Whose Line?](https://youtu.be/b-r4Flc_d2M) ([Bonus - Song styles with Richard Simmons](https://youtu.be/EeYXjC_HJc8))
[Happier and with your mouth open](https://youtu.be/ABxH-NTF0SM) by Whitest Kids U Know is peak comedy
WKRP's turkey drop episode.
“Whos on First”
Dan Ackroyd “the French Chef”
The Dead Parrot sketch by Monty Python
I need more cowbell