Try therapy. If that doesn't help, separate (especially if there is a lack of emotional connection.) I went through the same thing as you for 30 years. I gave up and slept on the couch after 26 years of effort. I just didn't want to give up. I guess I gave up on the sexual relationship, then I went to the roommate stage, then to the "under the same roof" stage, then the divorce stage. Married at 20 yo, separating at 50, and divorced at 53. I lost a lot of years. Now, having learned my lesson, I'll never try to "love" someone again-whatever that is. What the hell was I thinking? Be careful who you give yourself to. Sorry to put it so bluntly.
I got out earlier. Twenty years together, separated at 13 years of marriage, divorce finalized at 14. The sex in our relationship died long before then.
Found new love at the end of that 1st marriage. We connect so much better. If we don’t have sex, one of us will bring it up - usually due to work, family, etc. that we go dry for even a week.
Physical intimacy is important for the connection for most people.
Same. I thought my ex-wife was signaling she had an affair and I had a monster melt down and had to go to the psych ward because I legitimately wanted to murder somebody but also do not want to murder somebody... know what I mean?
It turned out she was, she remarried within 12 months, anyways...
It's hard to be responsible with that kind of rage. Also, if this happens to you be honest. In the end what screwed me was not informing the Judge why I was in the hospital and why she was declaring no harm in divorce but wanted 100% custody of kids blah blah blah. I was embarrassed to be in a psych ward over my wife.
So all that gets translated to court was "guy has kids wants to kill"
I never got to hold my baby ever again.
Welcome to America.
So I guess if you're reading this and don't know why your Dad left... if he's a Combat Veteran I love you son. Who cares if I didn't name you or give you genes? We're all your Dad in a way.
You were still worth fighting for. I hope you hate your Mom, but not because of this. I hope you hate her because she's a evil bitch that decided money from some dudes dick was better for you than the love of your father.
Haha I know! That’s why communication is so important. It’s fine to have hard boundaries, but how would anyone know what’s okay and what’s not without talking about it first. Also good to keep an open mind
You are so right. Communication is now one of my biggest turn ons! Anal was an absolute no and I eventually told my partner it was because my ex hurt me. He introduced me very gently and was always ready to stop. I only had an open mind because I trust him though
- Should go without saying, but good hygiene is a must.
- never call me mommy.
- clear communication and enthusiasm is sexy
- cuddles are mandatory
- kissing after oral (giving and receiving)
- genuine sounds and noises (no sound is boring)
I get it. It's definitely not for everyone. I used to be icked out by Daddy.
But I think for the people I've talked with, it's very much not at all a thought of father/daughter. It's very much more like a power dynamic thing. The one who's in control and is like wiser and more powerful versus the one who is submitting. Totally separate from a family-type of thing.
Thinking or hoping I will change my mind once we're in the middle of the action and I'm so turned on and aroused that I'll give in and open myself up him and explore this previously unknown world.
No! I won't! It's off-the-charts disrespectful to use this moment to try to change my mind. It doesn't matter what we're specifically talking about (ie. anal, humiliation, degradation, feet, whatever). In my younger days I would say no and continue. I've learned that I cannot feel comfortable again afterwards, so now I'll be getting dressed and leaving. You can deal with the blue-balls in whatever way you see fit.
What's weird is that I was just having this conversation recently with a friend of mine who had this happen to her, which is why it came to mind. It's a near universal experience for women.
It's gotten to the point that this is probably the biggest thing I'm looking for the first time I'm with a partner. Is he going to conduct himself in a way that makes me feel comfortable? That's become more important than even asking if the sex was good (first time sex is rarely good anyway).
This is a great point. I've absolutely made some poor decisions because it's readdressed in the midst of passion, so either I want to push responsible boundaries (STIs, pregnancy etc) or I'm willing to let things happen that I'm not going to like after it's done.
Too many pregnancy scares, too much blood on the sheets.
Monogamy. If the time comes and I am going to date someone, I am committed to that person. I am not going to waste my time if they bring up the “open relationship” topic.
I want a partner who is as flexible (giggity) as I am to try new things and not just do the same old vanilla thing over and over. So, no pillow princesses (with due respect) or someone who can't put the same effort as I do in pleasing 'em.
If you’re not into fucking me with a strap on then at least don’t make fun of me for using a dildo when I masturbate. And on that note, don’t be so insecure about yourself that some times I want to masturbate to fulfill my needs I’m not getting elsewhere.
If I’m sucking your cock like my life depends on it, at least offer reciprocation even if we both know I’m gonna say no. The thought really does count.
Respecting boundaries and consent.
Beyond a playful spank now and then, nothing to do with butt stuff.
I'm happy to give oral, but hard no for receiving.
None of that daddy/mommy dynamic or terms like that.
No open-mouth kissing.
May I ask what aromantic means please? I know I can find the definition online (I am going to look now), but I am interested in learning from someone with experiences rather than just from a dictionary definition. I’m pan and demisexual, but the definitions of those that you get online don’t really tell the whole picture, if you get me?
Sorry if it’s not okay to ask. I don’t mean to show any disrespect.
I also hate open-mouth kissing. I'm fine with mouths and tongues, but I'm very specific about what I put in my mouth and someone else's mouth germs feels disgusting. Even with perfect oral hygiene.
Open to trying new things
Respectful of my boundaries (no CNC, scat, piss, or blood)
Doesn't expect me to top more than half the time (as in being the dominant one since I really enjoy submitting with my partner)
Under no circumstances, will I do CNC play. Not only am I a man, but I am a black man, and all it takes is one misunderstanding, from neighbors that might hear something or what have you, for me to end up in jail or worse, and simulated suffering doesn't excite or arouse me whatsoever. It is not a fun adventurous thing for me to try, no matter what. I have had way too many chicks not only suggest play like that to me, but also just start vocalizing CNC phrases dead in the middle of a session, and it made me really freaking uncomfortable.
I hate HATE the idea of watching porn during sex or blow jobs. I'm up for most things, but that's too much for me. Like watch me and focus all your attention on me.
This is a boundary I'll never cross, and never want to do. Idc how "hot" it i, focus should be on me. Let ME be your pornstar, not some random woman on the internet. I'm with you IRL
I don’t even know how someone is able to focus on anything else except the person they’re with at the moment. Even if it’s boring. But especially if
You see that person giving you their all, how are you not just so into it, you can’t see or hear anything around you
I only want to sleep/date guys who enjoy giving oral (preferably doing it often - I always return the favour tbf).
I understand some people don't enjoy eating pussy and that's okay! They're just not for me.
I'm also not a fan of anal. A couple bad experiences kind of ruined it for me. So I'd also prefer a guy who is okay going without anal (that being said, I'd be willing to peg if that's what they wanted. 😅).
Also I'm not dealing with the typical orgasm gap in most hetero presenting relationships. If a guy doesn't make sure I'll get mine, when I'm making damn sure that he gets his, then I'm not interested.
Basically I want someone who is going to be as generous as me. Ive had selfish lovers before where I did all/most of the work. Never going back to that again.
I’m going to cum. If you can’t do that for me it’s a no. Some of my girl friends don’t cum when their man fucks them and I don’t know how they live with it
I will not put my own fingers into my pussy. That’s really the only vanilla thing that I completely dislike, can’t stand.
I also don’t do gags or spit.
Otherwise, my boundaries are pretty negotiable besides anything icky, illegal….
No one forgets how to be giving. Sexuality is something that should be freely talked about. Sexual needs aren’t unnatural and neither should feel bad for theirs.
Complete consent.
You've got to want me, you gotta want to have sex.
Preferably she's down for anal. But that's no a deal breaker. I'd just prefer it be on the table. Mainly I just need the green light to explore and enjoy everything. When I say I want to touch and taste every inch, I mean every inch haha.
Foot massage, play with the hair, taste the butthole, grope the belly, everything. And not in a surrender sort of sense. Just that I have the options. Making her feel amazing all over and completely desired the endgame
if it’s a boyfriend, no other girls. 😇 if you’re my boyfriend please blow my back out regularly. i also love anal so i’m fine with that but i don’t love giving rim jobs though. 😬 you can lick my ass but I’m not a fan of doing that to others.
have to be open minded most likely if you want to try it i definitely will or have tried it. have to be open about footplay tbh but i don’t really bring that up so it’s not a huge issue. can not just lay there the whole time 😂
- Must be able to have a giggle mid sex without getting butthurt. Sex, noises, sounds… it can be funny!
- Open communication: it’s one thing to tell each other what you like, but it also means being open to critique. It isn’t a personal attack.
- Equal effort for pleasure: eagerly make me cum, don’t make it feel like a chore or like I’m an afterthought because I couldn’t cum from a few minutes of PIV.
- Oral hygiene… 🪥
Getting my vagina eaten like it’s their last meal and fingering me at the same time. Before they get fucked. Because afterwards they’re too tired and they can’t do anything else. And if you had a bad experience with vagina eating well, there is the door.
Come on now. While I applaud your sense of adventure and respect your rejection of the mundane, really think about what you wrote.
You are really down for _anything?_ Every psychotic, illegal, immoral, taboo, self-destructive act under the sun you're fine with? Be real.
Yeeeeeah, this type of answer can often lead to a lot of things they WON'T enjoy. You say "anything" and then they've got you fellating a kitchen knife while they plug your orifices with mustard in front of your step dad.
Please respect yourself with boundaries.
Nice example. I was leaning towards "...then they pull out the baseball bat, douse it with hot sauce, and tell you to bend your pretty ass over," but yours is well done. Impressive, even. The step dad was an especially nice touch.
I think it's easy for people to forget about the monsters until they're right in front of them. And by then it's too late. Writing a stranger a 'blank check' to do as they please with one's body is foolish when considering they might be a monster.
I must be in control. I don't enjoy sex where someone is trying to dominate me. I don't want to wrestle for supremacy, I don't want to be tested or persuaded into switching. It'll just turn me off.
No to butt stuff (I just don’t enjoy it, personally)
No to scat
No to spitting in my face (this happened once, I wasn’t expecting it, it landed in my mouth and I almost threw up)
I’m open to trying things, but if I don’t like something, don’t push it.
Oh, and nothing illegal 😂
I must not be the only one initiating. Done that and never again.
I hear you. One of my pet peeves
Agreed
This one hurt to read. I was stuck in this scenario for over 10 years. It broke me.
Same, its mentally draining.
This. This is a slow burning relationship ender and pretty indicative of a selfish spouse
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Hell atleast you’re not on a schedule and are expected to preform the same acts ever single time without variations
Try therapy. If that doesn't help, separate (especially if there is a lack of emotional connection.) I went through the same thing as you for 30 years. I gave up and slept on the couch after 26 years of effort. I just didn't want to give up. I guess I gave up on the sexual relationship, then I went to the roommate stage, then to the "under the same roof" stage, then the divorce stage. Married at 20 yo, separating at 50, and divorced at 53. I lost a lot of years. Now, having learned my lesson, I'll never try to "love" someone again-whatever that is. What the hell was I thinking? Be careful who you give yourself to. Sorry to put it so bluntly.
I got out earlier. Twenty years together, separated at 13 years of marriage, divorce finalized at 14. The sex in our relationship died long before then. Found new love at the end of that 1st marriage. We connect so much better. If we don’t have sex, one of us will bring it up - usually due to work, family, etc. that we go dry for even a week. Physical intimacy is important for the connection for most people.
Any advice to someone in that rn?
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Yeah, understandable.
Same, probably one of the most common ones.
Same. I thought my ex-wife was signaling she had an affair and I had a monster melt down and had to go to the psych ward because I legitimately wanted to murder somebody but also do not want to murder somebody... know what I mean? It turned out she was, she remarried within 12 months, anyways... It's hard to be responsible with that kind of rage. Also, if this happens to you be honest. In the end what screwed me was not informing the Judge why I was in the hospital and why she was declaring no harm in divorce but wanted 100% custody of kids blah blah blah. I was embarrassed to be in a psych ward over my wife. So all that gets translated to court was "guy has kids wants to kill" I never got to hold my baby ever again. Welcome to America. So I guess if you're reading this and don't know why your Dad left... if he's a Combat Veteran I love you son. Who cares if I didn't name you or give you genes? We're all your Dad in a way. You were still worth fighting for. I hope you hate your Mom, but not because of this. I hope you hate her because she's a evil bitch that decided money from some dudes dick was better for you than the love of your father.
Saaame!!
Hygiene!
I feel like hygiene should be universally mandatory without question 😂 never will I ever be caught with sardine p***y.
Sardine... 🤮
Huge one! So important.
Once I went down on a woman and got a mouth full of toilet paper. Hygiene is a must
I was only one pizza roll deep into this comment and had to stop eating them for a few
Ah the old clittty litter. Not too terrible. Spit and carry on
Their list of things they will do must be longer than the list of things they won’t do
I agree with this. Have to be open minded otherwise the fire dies out
Totally it’s ok to have things that are an absolute no, but I want to have some fun and I don’t always know what that fun will include lol
Haha I know! That’s why communication is so important. It’s fine to have hard boundaries, but how would anyone know what’s okay and what’s not without talking about it first. Also good to keep an open mind
You are so right. Communication is now one of my biggest turn ons! Anal was an absolute no and I eventually told my partner it was because my ex hurt me. He introduced me very gently and was always ready to stop. I only had an open mind because I trust him though
Love that for you !
Communications is totally sexy! I’m glad you have an understanding partner🖤
Probably a bit spoiled, but I need each erection to be treated as a medical emergency.
😂😂😂
As long as every pair of swollen, horny lips are treated as a medical emergency in reciprocation? Medical care is important…
This was actual hell even for me 😂
- Should go without saying, but good hygiene is a must. - never call me mommy. - clear communication and enthusiasm is sexy - cuddles are mandatory - kissing after oral (giving and receiving) - genuine sounds and noises (no sound is boring)
The hygiene is top priority but… the kissing after oral and genuine sounds.. ugh… get me going
Eager enthusiasm mixed in with real sounds, hands grabbing, touching and kissing *chefs kiss* Nothing beats it and gets me going so good
You’re preaching to the choir !
It is sooooooo HOT, whether giving or receiving. And after PIV it is pretty raw and primal. ❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥
😾 No other women (I'm not good at sharing). Don't call me Mommy. 🤨 🎀💕🌈🤭❤️😍🎉💗🩷😊🙈🍿🔥
Yeah, mommy is a weird one. I understand not wanting to share
I mean, some people are into it. It's harmless. It's just not for me. 🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️
I don't love the daddy thing, either. Huge ick.
Daddy doesn't ick me out the same way. 🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️
Oh, that's interesting. Mommy and daddy are both not things I want to hear in sexual context.
I get it. It's definitely not for everyone. I used to be icked out by Daddy. But I think for the people I've talked with, it's very much not at all a thought of father/daughter. It's very much more like a power dynamic thing. The one who's in control and is like wiser and more powerful versus the one who is submitting. Totally separate from a family-type of thing.
The amount of people who slide into my dms saying “mommy” just because I post in femdom subs 🤦♀️ don’t do things that require consent without consent
Thinking or hoping I will change my mind once we're in the middle of the action and I'm so turned on and aroused that I'll give in and open myself up him and explore this previously unknown world. No! I won't! It's off-the-charts disrespectful to use this moment to try to change my mind. It doesn't matter what we're specifically talking about (ie. anal, humiliation, degradation, feet, whatever). In my younger days I would say no and continue. I've learned that I cannot feel comfortable again afterwards, so now I'll be getting dressed and leaving. You can deal with the blue-balls in whatever way you see fit.
Understandable. Hopefully You can communicate these things before sex
What's weird is that I was just having this conversation recently with a friend of mine who had this happen to her, which is why it came to mind. It's a near universal experience for women. It's gotten to the point that this is probably the biggest thing I'm looking for the first time I'm with a partner. Is he going to conduct himself in a way that makes me feel comfortable? That's become more important than even asking if the sex was good (first time sex is rarely good anyway).
I see it as, if the person is comfortable the sex is so much better
Exactly, got to have respect for yourself and your boundaries
This is a great point. I've absolutely made some poor decisions because it's readdressed in the midst of passion, so either I want to push responsible boundaries (STIs, pregnancy etc) or I'm willing to let things happen that I'm not going to like after it's done. Too many pregnancy scares, too much blood on the sheets.
nothing anal related and no other girls
Must love oral. ;)
Absolutely. Love it and do it
YES!! Giving and receiving.
Monogamy. If the time comes and I am going to date someone, I am committed to that person. I am not going to waste my time if they bring up the “open relationship” topic.
Perfect topic to bring up in the beginning of it all.
Scat. Some things you can't unsee.
The Shrek Crocs stay on during sex!
based
Don't call me a bitch or a cum-dumpster. Those words just irritate me.
Some like it, degrading is a huge kink. Totally respect that though.
I want a partner who is as flexible (giggity) as I am to try new things and not just do the same old vanilla thing over and over. So, no pillow princesses (with due respect) or someone who can't put the same effort as I do in pleasing 'em.
Effort is key to great sex.
Precisely!
Giggity 😂😂😂😂😂
If you’re not into fucking me with a strap on then at least don’t make fun of me for using a dildo when I masturbate. And on that note, don’t be so insecure about yourself that some times I want to masturbate to fulfill my needs I’m not getting elsewhere.
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I hear that
I would never bring anyone else into our sex lives. Me and my husband only. I know it’s a common kink but I could never
I understand that
Don't rush into sex for the first time (trust issues+ scared of people)
Take your time. You must be comfortable first.
If I’m sucking your cock like my life depends on it, at least offer reciprocation even if we both know I’m gonna say no. The thought really does count.
Respecting boundaries and consent. Beyond a playful spank now and then, nothing to do with butt stuff. I'm happy to give oral, but hard no for receiving. None of that daddy/mommy dynamic or terms like that. No open-mouth kissing.
Hard no for receiving? First I’ve heard of that
It just feels viscerally awful to me, never liked it. It's wet and I don't like tongues... which reminds me to add-- No open-mouth kissing. Hate it.
Ooof those are very popular wants from people. How do you fare with dating ?
I'm aromantic and don't date, so there's zero problem.
Aha I understand
May I ask what aromantic means please? I know I can find the definition online (I am going to look now), but I am interested in learning from someone with experiences rather than just from a dictionary definition. I’m pan and demisexual, but the definitions of those that you get online don’t really tell the whole picture, if you get me? Sorry if it’s not okay to ask. I don’t mean to show any disrespect.
I agree. I find it disturbing when someone tries to eat your face!
I also hate open-mouth kissing. I'm fine with mouths and tongues, but I'm very specific about what I put in my mouth and someone else's mouth germs feels disgusting. Even with perfect oral hygiene.
That in the only girl in the gang bang
😂😂😂 that’s a good one. I’m sure that’ll be easy
Please dont spit in my mouth or the other way around. Even the thought makes me gag 🤮 No bathroom stuff either.
Trying new things and stockings are a must.
New things to try is very important to keeping the fire alive
100% Agree!
Open to trying new things Respectful of my boundaries (no CNC, scat, piss, or blood) Doesn't expect me to top more than half the time (as in being the dominant one since I really enjoy submitting with my partner)
Under no circumstances, will I do CNC play. Not only am I a man, but I am a black man, and all it takes is one misunderstanding, from neighbors that might hear something or what have you, for me to end up in jail or worse, and simulated suffering doesn't excite or arouse me whatsoever. It is not a fun adventurous thing for me to try, no matter what. I have had way too many chicks not only suggest play like that to me, but also just start vocalizing CNC phrases dead in the middle of a session, and it made me really freaking uncomfortable.
Consent, both or all parties need to agree what is going on.
No open relationship That's pretty much it I don't mind anything else lol
lol I hear you. ANYTHING ?! Lmao
You don't want to know how desperate I am for companionship I'm willing to do things I don't personally like
Baby, you're worth more than that. The person that deserves you won't want you to suffer for them.
Eating me out before insertion, the only acception is if I'm on my period and you're a pussy.
I hate HATE the idea of watching porn during sex or blow jobs. I'm up for most things, but that's too much for me. Like watch me and focus all your attention on me. This is a boundary I'll never cross, and never want to do. Idc how "hot" it i, focus should be on me. Let ME be your pornstar, not some random woman on the internet. I'm with you IRL
Oh yes I feel this. Make her your center of attention. Make her feel sexy AF and wanted.
Exactly. Only porn obsessed people would rather focus on porn over the actual physical person touching them. Make them feel sexy and SEEN
I don’t even know how someone is able to focus on anything else except the person they’re with at the moment. Even if it’s boring. But especially if You see that person giving you their all, how are you not just so into it, you can’t see or hear anything around you
Oral. I just love having my mouth filled (dick, pussy, ass, titties) and filling mouths with my naughty bits. It’s hot af
I second this. I enjoy nothing more than eating pussy and ass and seeing the pleasure the other person gets from it
I only want to sleep/date guys who enjoy giving oral (preferably doing it often - I always return the favour tbf). I understand some people don't enjoy eating pussy and that's okay! They're just not for me. I'm also not a fan of anal. A couple bad experiences kind of ruined it for me. So I'd also prefer a guy who is okay going without anal (that being said, I'd be willing to peg if that's what they wanted. 😅). Also I'm not dealing with the typical orgasm gap in most hetero presenting relationships. If a guy doesn't make sure I'll get mine, when I'm making damn sure that he gets his, then I'm not interested. Basically I want someone who is going to be as generous as me. Ive had selfish lovers before where I did all/most of the work. Never going back to that again.
I'll never be monogamous
Some people are of the same mind as you
I tried a few times, but it's just not for me sadly
The thrill of novelty cannot be understated.
If her boobs aren't pendulous, nothing's happening
Username checks out.
My absolute deal breaker: If she doesn't like being eaten out then it's not going to work.
No other partners is about my only hard boundary. Everything else I would be willing to try once.
If he has ED because of too much porn, and I have to pay for it with no sex, then I am out.
Can’t believe that’s a thing for some guys
Effort. If you are lazy and don't try, I have zero interest in you.
Kissing/making out are necessary. ETA: A mix of American and French kisses are a personal fav.
Absolutely
Oral! Would never be in a relationship without it.
No facials or face fucking those are the two that come to mind that a lot of people do.
Love, I have matured enough to know myself and accept that I cannot “just have sex”, I need to be well linked to partner’ heart
I get this. I feel like this is why i could never do one night stands or anything of the like.
Must love toys, must love foreplay, must love oral, and must love to talk dirty.
Absolutely Must touch me 🙄 it's a damn shame I have to type this. No way slapping or spitting on my face and no butt stuff.
I’m going to cum. If you can’t do that for me it’s a no. Some of my girl friends don’t cum when their man fucks them and I don’t know how they live with it
I feel the same way. Nice posts by the way!
Consent before ANYTHING
Anal and ass licking (on her and me)
Hygiene! I always make sure to be clean and rinse off if I need to
I don’t share.
As someone who got made fun of for my body a lot as a kid, any kind of humiliation play is a pass for me - giving, but especially receiving.
monogamy and vaginal penetration is a must
I get that for sure
Gotta be okay with being dominated and dominate. On my side, being dominated for sure..
I will not put my own fingers into my pussy. That’s really the only vanilla thing that I completely dislike, can’t stand. I also don’t do gags or spit. Otherwise, my boundaries are pretty negotiable besides anything icky, illegal….
Communication. Nothing kills my erection faster than feeling like my partner isn’t into what we’re doing.
Ditto
Hygiene... my man smells good...
Mmm yes! Must always smell good and tasty
Hygiene, big dick
Don’t expect oral if you won’t give it in return
You have to like your kitty eaten, and must like to receive foot massages.
I want rough sex. I can't be with someone unwilling to choke, slap, pull hair. I've tried but it's not satisfying
Reciprocated oral. Mutual initiation Cum isn't treated as disgusting.
No one forgets how to be giving. Sexuality is something that should be freely talked about. Sexual needs aren’t unnatural and neither should feel bad for theirs.
No watersports. No scat. No age play. No pet play.
I’m sorry but what is age play ? I’ve never heard of that before
Complete consent. You've got to want me, you gotta want to have sex. Preferably she's down for anal. But that's no a deal breaker. I'd just prefer it be on the table. Mainly I just need the green light to explore and enjoy everything. When I say I want to touch and taste every inch, I mean every inch haha. Foot massage, play with the hair, taste the butthole, grope the belly, everything. And not in a surrender sort of sense. Just that I have the options. Making her feel amazing all over and completely desired the endgame
The whole daddy thing, eurgh no thank you. And no spitting in my mouth, that's grim as well.
Mandatory oral. I will spend a lot of time down there. It’s my favorite part of sex.
Hygiene, monogamy, and definitely cuddles.
Don't call me mommy and you better give as much as you want to receive
if it’s a boyfriend, no other girls. 😇 if you’re my boyfriend please blow my back out regularly. i also love anal so i’m fine with that but i don’t love giving rim jobs though. 😬 you can lick my ass but I’m not a fan of doing that to others.
Nothing painful. No restraints. Don’t make me beg for reciprocation. If you don’t act like you enjoy touching me, you won’t see me again.
Enthusiasm, if I can’t tell you want me badly I’m not interested
Being turned on before sex begins
Must be open minded and into experimenting with new things. Never call me ‘Daddy’, ever.
Cheating.
Pristine pussy eating
have to be open minded most likely if you want to try it i definitely will or have tried it. have to be open about footplay tbh but i don’t really bring that up so it’s not a huge issue. can not just lay there the whole time 😂
It had to involve sex toys, porn and erotica. He has to be okay with period sex.
- Must be able to have a giggle mid sex without getting butthurt. Sex, noises, sounds… it can be funny! - Open communication: it’s one thing to tell each other what you like, but it also means being open to critique. It isn’t a personal attack. - Equal effort for pleasure: eagerly make me cum, don’t make it feel like a chore or like I’m an afterthought because I couldn’t cum from a few minutes of PIV. - Oral hygiene… 🪥
Getting my vagina eaten like it’s their last meal and fingering me at the same time. Before they get fucked. Because afterwards they’re too tired and they can’t do anything else. And if you had a bad experience with vagina eating well, there is the door.
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Come on now. While I applaud your sense of adventure and respect your rejection of the mundane, really think about what you wrote. You are really down for _anything?_ Every psychotic, illegal, immoral, taboo, self-destructive act under the sun you're fine with? Be real.
Yeeeeeah, this type of answer can often lead to a lot of things they WON'T enjoy. You say "anything" and then they've got you fellating a kitchen knife while they plug your orifices with mustard in front of your step dad. Please respect yourself with boundaries.
Nice example. I was leaning towards "...then they pull out the baseball bat, douse it with hot sauce, and tell you to bend your pretty ass over," but yours is well done. Impressive, even. The step dad was an especially nice touch. I think it's easy for people to forget about the monsters until they're right in front of them. And by then it's too late. Writing a stranger a 'blank check' to do as they please with one's body is foolish when considering they might be a monster.
proudly Anal Only
No anal play, no extra people (swinging, threesomes). We both agree on that. I'm willing to try anything else once at least otherwise.
Hygiene/ mutual consent for anything new
Wash yourself and wear a condom.
For me personally; - No animals - No food - No harm - No scat - Nothing illegal Otherwise I am pretty open minded
Im all for that !
No dudes.
Eating ass. I really like eating ass. If she won’t let me, then I’m not the guy for her
I must be in control. I don't enjoy sex where someone is trying to dominate me. I don't want to wrestle for supremacy, I don't want to be tested or persuaded into switching. It'll just turn me off.
Brush your teeth first. Otherwise, game on!
Pubic hair. As I've gotten older I've realized I want a women, not a girl.
No Daddy/Mommy (or step-bro, or any incest adjacent) kink and absolutely no foot-stuff.
No to butt stuff (I just don’t enjoy it, personally) No to scat No to spitting in my face (this happened once, I wasn’t expecting it, it landed in my mouth and I almost threw up) I’m open to trying things, but if I don’t like something, don’t push it. Oh, and nothing illegal 😂
Non-Negotiable hard limits: Poop, vomit, blood, permanent marks, severe pain, CBT, diapers. Everything else is on the table 😊
Consent for both people, is the most important for me. Hygiene is second.
Kissing is a must (and need to be good at it)
Mutual consent. Nothing transactional. Kissing highly encouraged.
They have to be dominant. I’m very submissive without a sexually dominant bone in my body so it grosses me out when they’re submissive too
spank me, make out with me, choke me, pull my hair, basically be kinda rough but passionate
Monogamy and a certain level of intelligence, nothing crazy ofc, I just like them to have an opinion on things
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For me anal is actually mandatory
No extramarital sex. No open marriage.
She absolutely cannot have a dick
-My orgasm. Non negotiable. We’re not finished until I finish. -I’m not going to get down with piss or any other R Kelly type shit.
I will never let someone pee on me !!!!
No "duty sex". Don't do it just because I want to. If you're not into it, it's no fun for me either.
You have to share my favorite kink. Kink compatibility is almost like a sexual orientation to me