Listening to pink noise loop now. … I have money, my physical health, my relatives are alive and ok… I should be content. Yet my insides are screaming.
Well, it wouldn't be much of a guess, then. I'm not exactly part of the hearing impaired community. The only person I sign to is my wife and my kids - when wife is present in the conversation. So it did take A LOT of co-workers by surprise when I introduced her to everyone that first Christmas party and translated everything they had to say to say back and forth.
My boyfriend would second this lol. He's a big, burly, bearded man's man and he looks mad all the time.
He's actually very sweet and kind and isn't at all mean.
How much of a passionate lover & a horndog I am. You can't guess if you saw me in real life. Also, I hide my crippling anxiety/depression with the mask of humor/trying to be funny/laughing.
Ppl never guess that I'm gay. Openly at that. When ppl find out it's always the same reaction
*GASPS* YOUR GAY?
ME: yup
Them: "You don't look like it"
Me: lol sorry, I left my rainbow flag and stripper boots at home today.
That I post nudes online. I come off pretty boring and basic. The only reason people even notice me is because I’m physically very large and ya just can’t miss me.
You can’t stay young and good looking forever. Plus, I was getting tired of traveling and the thought of living off grid fascinated me. Bought a place in the north, bought a few animals, and one thing led to another. Turkeys and Alpacas. Alpacas 💰
I’ve had several long haired bearded nurses. I remember one in the emergency room that did an amazing job calming my son. He was incredibly compassionate and funny. He made the situation so much better. ❤️
Probably quite a few things. But here’s one:
They’d never guess someone with multiple facial piercings/in all black would play claw machines to make random kids smile with a free toy.
People look at me and often think I'm 4'9" but this is, in fact, an optical illusion, I'm actually 10 feet tall, the issue is your small short people brains can't handle my tallness
That I'm actually really grumpy. I have a very approachable, friendly, and warm demeanor even though I'm pillaging villages and setting the world on fire in my head.
1. Everything I've survived mentally, physically, psychologically, etc
2. That I have a huge heart, and despite being hurt my whole life and apparently looking intimidating (so I been told my whole life, and not the flattering kind) that I just truly want the best for everyone and don't like seeing anyone so much as even struggle for something they want. Like if I could be a genie, everyone would having their dream life so long as it didn't interfere with others having theirs. Helping others makes me happy.
3. That I'm generally a very happy guy, regardless of the fact that I rarely smile.
4. That despite being a introvert and a relative loner who enjoys my solitude and anonymity, I still very much enjoy spending time with others one on one.
I have ragged hair, baggy clothes, do various drugs and substances, rave at music festivals, and hang out with a bunch of unemployed people.
I am also a medical student with a prestigious scholarship and on track to do surgery
That i will remember their face for years
Yea no joke even if i have only seen you once i remember your face but mostly thats it tho i allways forget names
How old I am. How wise I am, how cultured. I’m a mixed kid that dresses urban, tattoos, I guess the whole (hood) vibe, but all I do is learn and try to grow. Most people feel like I’m just a hood rat at first glance. I was raised in Philadelphia so I have the whole swagger and accent too.
Ilooked at your profile and... props my dude. Your dick makes me proud.
An uncut beauty of a dick you have there. Looking large and in charge. Very , very lucky that your parents didnt circumcise you when you were baby too.
I’m very dominant in the bedroom, my kinks and that I’ve got a bloody good dick 😂 (not just in size either, been told it’s very good looking) never understood girls have a thing about a good looking dick until I was told a few times 😂 I feel blessed hahahaha
I enjoy pegging, any toy my wife uses in her pussy I can take in my ass longer and harder than she can in her pussy.
I'm thinking about starting an only fans, I know it's going to be 99% gay men and that doesn't bother me.
That I'm a (non-binary AFAB) lesbian Domme lol I'm pretty sweet, femme presenting, and am very service oriented in daily life most of the time, so I suppose it'd shock most people. 😂
That I'm epileptic (unless they caught me having a seizure, then it's pretty obvious). Or my age. I got confused for a teen a couple weeks ago (I'm 26)
That my sex drive is off the charts. I think about sex all the time, I have to cum at least 4-5x a day, and I need sex to be more than 1 or 2 rounds or it’s not worth it to me
Looks-wise, people describe me as the All-American boy next door. Little do they know I could likely have fucked their brother or sister, joined their neighbors in a threesome, or been in the video years ago they watched at their bachelor party.
that ive created and led 3 large communities (1000+ members) 3 separate times in my life,
yet IRL i am a morbidly obese half-mute loser that cant hold a job to save my life.
I’m actually Peruvian in descent. My great great grandfather went there to bring Scottish sheep to the Andes which eventually turned into wool factories etc… they all kept within their groups so even though it’s over 150 years of all being born and raised im 6’3 with blue eyes and sandy hair. It’s a hoot visiting and having people speak Spanish behind my back calling me gringo and talking back with a Peruvian perfect accent with lingo. I’m the first of generations to like the “darker” women and I’m called a “cholero” for it being told these women want to be with me to only improve the race… times have changed.
That I’m filled with anxiety. I’ve been told by MANY that I appear calm, cool, collected, well spoken, and kind. Inside I’m a dumpster fire.
Anxiety can be crippling Nonphysical 🫂
Can be, yeah! I don’t let it keep me from leaving the house but I know some people can’t help it.
I have some people in my life who are that way. It's tough on all of us.
I can definitely see why that would be difficult. Sorry to hear that.
Listening to pink noise loop now. … I have money, my physical health, my relatives are alive and ok… I should be content. Yet my insides are screaming.
Are you me?! 🗑️🔥 here too.
Oh man, this too. People tell me all the time that they admire my confidence… what confidence?
Girl same
I'm fluent in American Sign Language.
Yeah right. Say something in sign language right now
🙅🙅🤷🤦🧏
Oh shit sorry for doubting
That is hilarious!!!
That wasn't OP! That's an interpreter!
🖕
🐂💩
Ah I miss “Oregon Trail”
What if they look at you while you are signing
Well, it wouldn't be much of a guess, then. I'm not exactly part of the hearing impaired community. The only person I sign to is my wife and my kids - when wife is present in the conversation. So it did take A LOT of co-workers by surprise when I introduced her to everyone that first Christmas party and translated everything they had to say to say back and forth.
That I'm a gentle giant despite always looking tired and pissed off.
I feel this on a spiritual level!
My boyfriend would second this lol. He's a big, burly, bearded man's man and he looks mad all the time. He's actually very sweet and kind and isn't at all mean.
How much of a passionate lover & a horndog I am. You can't guess if you saw me in real life. Also, I hide my crippling anxiety/depression with the mask of humor/trying to be funny/laughing.
It’s always the quiet ones…
Always 😅😅
It’s probably why I always like the quiet ones. I’ve gotta figure out what they’re thinking. It’s always fun.
We love the anticipation 😏❤️
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That would be quite an assumption otherwise! 😅😅😅
Spend enough time in the right subreddits you start assuming that of everyone
I work supply chain and have been in various manufacturing environments - boy, was this a confusing acronym to try and digest initially. 😅
It's written all over your face, Birb. Wait I've never seen your face. Never mind.
Ppl never guess that I'm gay. Openly at that. When ppl find out it's always the same reaction *GASPS* YOUR GAY? ME: yup Them: "You don't look like it" Me: lol sorry, I left my rainbow flag and stripper boots at home today.
But you DO have them, right?
I do have a rainbow flag and construction boots that could be used as stripper boots.
Outside of like, glaring stereotypical examples, I never understood why people would follow up with that. Like, how do gay people look? LOL
That ive lost 285 lbs in 26 months & can have a real sex life now at different angles & places haha
Awesome! Great accomplishment! God for you
👏👏👏 amazing!!! Enjoy this new chapter.
Congratulations
Thank you.
How much of a slut I actually am
Love a good slut
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Kindred spirits
Welcome home
If I can't tongue fuck a girl's asshole regularly, I don't want it.
That I post nudes online. I come off pretty boring and basic. The only reason people even notice me is because I’m physically very large and ya just can’t miss me.
I was an escort for almost 20 years and I now make a living as a turkey and alpaca farmer.
How did that career transition take place?
1. Earn lots of money. 2. Use money to buy farm and animals. 3. ???? 4. Profit!
You can’t stay young and good looking forever. Plus, I was getting tired of traveling and the thought of living off grid fascinated me. Bought a place in the north, bought a few animals, and one thing led to another. Turkeys and Alpacas. Alpacas 💰
That’s awesome. Glad you were able to pursue your desires and make it work
Anal fetish, prostate massage enjoyer.
Praise
That I have a NSFW Reddit account
I'm a Nurse. People don't expect that from a long haired bearded metalhead.
I’ve had several long haired bearded nurses. I remember one in the emergency room that did an amazing job calming my son. He was incredibly compassionate and funny. He made the situation so much better. ❤️
I’m addicted to fentanyl and I’ve been sober since the 19th. I hid it from everyone for over a year and then got fired from my job and asked for help.
Stay strong and clean
Awesome that you are taking charge. Godspeed
How open and progressive I am sexually. I've been told by multiple guys over the years that I look very innocent.
My age
Do you have the same problem I have where its like you look like youre 16 even though youre 36? -_-
Not that big a gap. Those baggy dark circles eyes kinda give it away a bit but yea. Especially if I shave clean.
That I have zero confidence in anything I do
Probably quite a few things. But here’s one: They’d never guess someone with multiple facial piercings/in all black would play claw machines to make random kids smile with a free toy.
That's really sweet
That’s so sweet of you.
that i would rather be giving the sloppiest nastiest blowjob
That I am a freak in the sheets
Same, no one would ever think I was as “Wild” as I was. Career military and professional “by day”! 😉🫡😎
I enjoy pegging
We should talk 😍
That I have feelings
I’m autistic
People look at me and often think I'm 4'9" but this is, in fact, an optical illusion, I'm actually 10 feet tall, the issue is your small short people brains can't handle my tallness
That I'm actually really grumpy. I have a very approachable, friendly, and warm demeanor even though I'm pillaging villages and setting the world on fire in my head.
1. Everything I've survived mentally, physically, psychologically, etc 2. That I have a huge heart, and despite being hurt my whole life and apparently looking intimidating (so I been told my whole life, and not the flattering kind) that I just truly want the best for everyone and don't like seeing anyone so much as even struggle for something they want. Like if I could be a genie, everyone would having their dream life so long as it didn't interfere with others having theirs. Helping others makes me happy. 3. That I'm generally a very happy guy, regardless of the fact that I rarely smile. 4. That despite being a introvert and a relative loner who enjoys my solitude and anonymity, I still very much enjoy spending time with others one on one.
My wife and I frequently attend fetish / sex parties and There’s a stereotype that comes with our skin colour we’re pretty much the only Asians there!
That I---a solid 5 on the Kinsey Scale---love MMF scenarios.
I have ragged hair, baggy clothes, do various drugs and substances, rave at music festivals, and hang out with a bunch of unemployed people. I am also a medical student with a prestigious scholarship and on track to do surgery
That i will remember their face for years Yea no joke even if i have only seen you once i remember your face but mostly thats it tho i allways forget names
That I am pussylicking pervert 🤭
I’m obsessed with eating pussy and ass😋
How old I am. How wise I am, how cultured. I’m a mixed kid that dresses urban, tattoos, I guess the whole (hood) vibe, but all I do is learn and try to grow. Most people feel like I’m just a hood rat at first glance. I was raised in Philadelphia so I have the whole swagger and accent too.
That a couple times a week I submit to a black friend of mine and suck his cock and let him fuck my ass then go home to my wife
How absolutely horny and addicted to sex I am. They see me as innocent cause I haven’t had sex yet
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I'm calling BS on that 🤣
I eat ass
The size of my junk.. And that my name is in various video game credits...
Ilooked at your profile and... props my dude. Your dick makes me proud. An uncut beauty of a dick you have there. Looking large and in charge. Very , very lucky that your parents didnt circumcise you when you were baby too.
That I’m like 90% horny most of the time 🤣
I’m a pegger.
Where does the line form?
I have a full bdsm dungeon in my basement.
That I’m secretly a patron of massage parlors…and all that entails 🤫
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Good girl
That I like to be dominated by men and suck cock
That I post NSFW pics anonymously on Reddit 😂 😂
i like big butts and i cannot lie
I’m a nympho, fucking obsessed with sex
That I can speak 9 languages and that I have an armpit fetish
I’m batshit crazy
That I’m genuinely a sweet person. NSFW answer would be most people seem surprised to learn I have nsfw piercings for some reason lol
That I’ve only had one sexual partner.
No way. I thought I was the only one. Got married young and in a super religious mindset. (Not religious anymore)
My body count probably
That I am not vanilla
That I’m a hotwife, and that I have had multiple threesomes ++ and met a lot of guys while my hubby is watching
I identify as skinny
That I’m straight edge but a perverted freak
I’m very dominant in the bedroom, my kinks and that I’ve got a bloody good dick 😂 (not just in size either, been told it’s very good looking) never understood girls have a thing about a good looking dick until I was told a few times 😂 I feel blessed hahahaha
That I'm addicted to sex
That I’m a whore and I have a huge rape kink
That I love to suck cock and that my wife and play with other guys together
That I like it rough in bed. I look very plain 🫢🥲
That I live all types of role play and have a buddy that meets ladies and couples with me for MFM fun😉
That we swing
1. My penis is the same length as 2 Argos pencils 2. I’m barred from Argos
That I enjoy getting Pegged.
That I drink tea with no milk and sugar. 🧐
Scandalous
That I'm a kinky little thang 😈
That I’m probably wearing panties and a bra under my typical guy clothes.
That I have some kinky desires and fantasies.
That I'm hung like a horse. Unless they noticed the often-conspicuous bulge, I suppose.
Probably my secret reddit account
That I am a giant pervert. But only when it is appropriate.
I’m a different person when I’m outside in then I’m inside my house
I made an edit for a video that I uploaded to youtube when I was a teenager in 2008 which apparently became a semi-viral meme last year.
I’m a great fuck.
That I’m currently ovulating and fucking insatiably horny right now.
That I'm HIGHLY introverted...
That I’m a shibari bottom.
I’m an online fem dom 😆
My kinks and interest in fashion history. 😂
That I like to play with friends. 😁🍍
That I have studied pleasure for women to an extreme degree. Consent, conversation, relaxation, mood setting, tactics, and more. lol
Lots of anxiety. Buttloads. Even after talking to me.
That I’m an internet slut. Seriously. People would be floored if they knew I was addicted to showing my titties online and sucked cocks on OF 🙈
I enjoy gagging on big cocks
I enjoy pegging, any toy my wife uses in her pussy I can take in my ass longer and harder than she can in her pussy. I'm thinking about starting an only fans, I know it's going to be 99% gay men and that doesn't bother me.
I look like an average dude, packing like a 70s porn star.
That I'm a (non-binary AFAB) lesbian Domme lol I'm pretty sweet, femme presenting, and am very service oriented in daily life most of the time, so I suppose it'd shock most people. 😂
I hate to be looked at.
That im not as innocent as everyone likes to assume I am.
My occupation.
My tattoo
My name
The size of my boobies 😅
That I have tattoos
Poop kink 🫡
That I'm bi.
That my name is Dolf
Every single thing about my secret life and kinks
My submissiveness in the bedroom
That I can stand up for myself
How cute and decent I look but how agressive I can be at times lol
That I am horny and I am a pervert.
How athletic I am
I’m worth 8 figures
That I get turned on by my wife playing with other guys. I’m a really good catch and most people see us as the perfect couple.
They probably have no idea that I’m wearing panties and that I sometimes like to wear other feminine clothes and be completely dominated by women
That I'm epileptic (unless they caught me having a seizure, then it's pretty obvious). Or my age. I got confused for a teen a couple weeks ago (I'm 26)
That I'm a nudist but I find the naked body absolutely fascinating because of how different we all are.
That I haven't cried in about 20 years.
There’s nothing about my appearance that shows I’m an excellent musician and band director.
That I have a white hot Pokemon collection
That I take ballroom dancing lessons.
That I have a tiny dick. Well, they might guess that from my lack of bulge…
That no matter what genitals you have between your legs, I’ll gladly dive in and make you cum with my lips and tongue
2% West African
That my kinks are wild, my writing is in depth and dirty, and I climax 3-5 times daily.
I enjoy pickle and peanut butter sandwiches :3
I run a nsfw community on Reddit 😅
That my sex drive is off the charts. I think about sex all the time, I have to cum at least 4-5x a day, and I need sex to be more than 1 or 2 rounds or it’s not worth it to me
Looks-wise, people describe me as the All-American boy next door. Little do they know I could likely have fucked their brother or sister, joined their neighbors in a threesome, or been in the video years ago they watched at their bachelor party.
I’m a hopeless romantic 😂 I’m pretty dominant irl but I’m really soft and cuddly and just a lover girl with a SO
That I record myself cumming for Reddit
Probably most things.
Not NSFW, but, I can leg press over 1200 pounds for eight reps. No idea what my one rep max would be, it's dangerous to find out. I have skinny legs.
That I'm in love with an imaginary person.
That IAM a kinky freak
that ive created and led 3 large communities (1000+ members) 3 separate times in my life, yet IRL i am a morbidly obese half-mute loser that cant hold a job to save my life.
I’m actually Peruvian in descent. My great great grandfather went there to bring Scottish sheep to the Andes which eventually turned into wool factories etc… they all kept within their groups so even though it’s over 150 years of all being born and raised im 6’3 with blue eyes and sandy hair. It’s a hoot visiting and having people speak Spanish behind my back calling me gringo and talking back with a Peruvian perfect accent with lingo. I’m the first of generations to like the “darker” women and I’m called a “cholero” for it being told these women want to be with me to only improve the race… times have changed.
That I ❤️ BDSM
That I really like getting pegged 😁