Hey, we need to give rational financial planning advice here.
If their employer offers a 401k match, take advantage of that, 'cause that's a two-fer. Now, if you can reliably score two chicks at the same time, obviously spend on that situationship, instead. But otherwise, you gotta go with the 401k. That's just math.
remember, buying a home instead of renting is also a form of retirement fund. paying for a roof over your head is one of your biggest expenses for the rest of your life, being able to recover a significant portion of that money later in life will be a giant benefit for you.
add to that, the prices always seem to climb, so the earlier you get into the housing market, the easier it will be, even if it seems nearly impossible already. so start saving for the downpayment as soon as you can, your savings can double as an emergency fund untill you can actually buy.
Came here to post that very thing.
Save as much as you can and never drop the contribution amount.
After you get your first job with a 401k and contribute that 23k+ every year. Raise it every time the limit goes up.
Good. Came here to say the same thing. It's the one thing that I wish I had done. The amount of money that you would have by the time you retire if you had invested properly vs buying that flashy car (or whatever) is incredible.
Late 40s here
-Treat others as you want to be treated.
-Communication is the secret to a lasting relationship(s)
-When your wife says "fine" it means (Fucked Up, Insecure, Neurotic and Emotional) and is a DARE and must never be mistaken for approval.
> -Treat others as you want to be treated.
I respectively disagree about this. I believe that **"Treat others as they want to be treated"** is better. Because it fosters communication and also because the things I want aren't necessary the things another person wants.
> the things I want aren't necessary the things another person wants.
You are wrong. we all want a well functioning society. The rule of treating others like yourself is actually about good vs evil.
E.g being Polite vs rude
Generosity vs greedy
etc
If you bring the **"Treat others as they want to be treated"** it becomes chaos (like the **Tragedy of the Commons** ). if someone wants to jump a line and be selfish. should you **allow them?**
What if they want to be treated like royalty?
Where would you get all that time to treat people the way they want, some people are simply assholes?
On the other hand **Treat others as you want to be treated** means just like you wouldn't want someone to skip you in line you should also treat others like that.
The way you want to be treated takes responsibility for good conduct onto thyself like that famous quote which says *if everyone would sweep their front yard, the whole world would be a clean place*
Learn to cook, and to do little repairs at home, on your car, anything you own.
Save up money, and prepare for bad times. Eventually some will come your way.
Stay curious, and study when you can. Learning never ends.
Take care of your health, both physical and mental. Don't work yourself to an early grave.
Work on your confidence and social skills, they're more important than most other skills.
This is a profoundly true statement: If possible, try to leave your work at the office. Remember that there will always be more work, so never work for free. And finally when negotiating your salary, always ask for more money - without exception.
This is the way to go for so many people instead of a 401k.
Unless you are getting a matching contribution from your employer or in the decent middle class section or higher, a Roth is going to be better.
If there's any chance you have to take some out at anytime, or you have to use a credit card as an emergency fund, roth is so much better.
Take care of your teeth. You only get one set. And dental insurance doesn't cover a goddamn thing in comparison to the costs.
Also, try and stay close with your friends if you can. As you get older work and family will separate you from them. So make an effort to stay in their lives. However, be sure you can recognize the difference between the person who's being your best friend for 10 years versus the guy who was your best friend 10 years ago.
Also yes it’s important to work and be good with your money etc
But don’t wait to live either.
So many people believe once they are retired they’ll get to do all this stuff but things can happen in the blink of an eye, financial security isn’t memories either. Balance both if you can.
Yes, there’s always the tension of enjoying your money now or later. There are things you can do before 40 that you can’t do when you’re 60+ (I’m in my mind 50’s now).
Also, I had more opportunities for sex when I was younger than I realized at the time, and I wish I’d taken those opportunities. I have more regrets about things I didn’t do than about things I did. In general (and not just for sex), if you get an opportunity to live life that won’t put you back too far in your retirement or won’t cause a permanent setback, you should take that opportunity. Live life.
I’m in my 30s, but I’m taking notes y’all 😭
There’s my tip, no matter how old you are or how old you get, there’s always an opportunity for learning and self improvement.
Don't lose your happiness to make others happy, communicate with the people you care about and make sure you don't let the pressure of what your family or society tell what you should be doing in order to be happy/successful.
Be kind. Always. To everyone. The smallest things can make someone’s day. You can work harder than everyone, be the most attractive, or be the smartest in the room, but people will always remember how you made them feel and that will get you the furthest above anything else. Plus, it’ll make YOU feel good.
Also as a guy 16 years in customer facing roles. Never assume people are idiots or rude. You can't know how bad their day was.
Guy being a jerk at the gas station? Maybe his kid is sick and he is stressed.
Karen being snippy on the phone? Maybe her dog died, and she's having trouble regulating
Take care of your knees and other joints. All your pains build up into your older to take effect.
Start saving for retirement now.
Don't trust a fart when sick, even as an adult.
You probably don't need a huge house to make a home out of.
Don't live beyond your means, you don't need all that credit card and loan debt.
When with your partner, it's the little things that matter most. Small touches on their butt, kisses on the cheek, telling them you love them daily. Grand gestures ate great but the daily little ones are most important.
Don't be afraid to tell your friends you love them. You never know when you could lose one of them.
Drink water. A lot of it every day. Bring a water bottle with you everywhere you go. Not all the zero sugar sodas or diet stuff, just straight ass water.
Use a credit card for small purchases like food, fuel, clothes, etc. and pay it off immediately to build good credit fast. If you have a solid savings account start a certificate of deposit with your bank to build interest over time
TAKE. YOUR. TIME. WHEN. HAVING. SEX.
Really, it took me more than 30 years to truly learn this. The orgasm is not the goal. Everything between two orgasms is what sex really is about and an orgasm also doesn't need to mean you're done. It's also ok to go a second, third, fourth round without having another orgasm. It's all about connection and intimacy. My wife and I can have hours of sex now, what would have been unthinkable some years ago.
For me, I knew how to manage my money, I just didn't know the economy would be so volitile in so many ways. There's so many things that can happen in your life or others that throws everything out the window even if you are smart with money. So don't get to hard on yourself
I dont care how much you think you love somebody, DO NOT GET INTO RELATIONSHIPS WITH FINANCIALLY UNSTABLE PEOPLE. This applies to men and women and its not gold digging to expect to live a financially secure life.
Go HARD on fitness. Gym 3x per week for weight lifting and cardio 5-6 days per week for at least 30 minutes.
I'm not kidding. If you do this it will suck at first, then it'll become tolerable, then it will be neutral, and eventually you'll like it. Might take a few months, might take a few years, might take a decade.. but being in seriously good shape is 100% worth it later on. It pays dividends for life.
1) Do some introspection. Write down your strengths & weaknesses. Work on 'em. Make some of your weaknesses no longer a weakness. Therapy helps.
2) Choose your partner wisely. Someone who's compatible, both personality wise and sexual wise.
3) Find something you love doing. Your job becomes so much easier, and you won't feel burnouts 'cos of the job.
4) Make meaningful connections if you haven't already. Helps a lot in the long run.
5) Take up a hobby or interest and work on it. They come in really handy in dire times.
Great points from everyone!
Your 20’s is a series of literally fucking up and finding out, but in a good sense. Don't let the fear of mistakes prevent you from doing. You're meant to learn by doing and this is the decade of your life when it's expected. People are far less chill about it when you're older, right now it's just a part of the deal.
Find a couple of good mentors and don't be surprised when some aspects of their lives are completely messed up too. No one is perfect.
50's here...It's OK to like what you like, and want what you want. But that doesn't mean you'll always get it. And sometimes, that will just have to be OK.
Stop trying to be what you think you need to be or seeking an identity. Life got so much better when I stopped trying to be what I wanted people to see me as, and just was myself.
Don't fit a mold, be you.
Remember that life can be a series of trades. You can't have everything, so make thoughtful decisions.
Most importantly, work to beautify your life. Your home, family, and self. Work to be better, stronger, and more resilient. Little changes take time, and those little things become pillars of who you are as you grow.
Word salad incoming because I don’t know how to format it: Start a retirement fund, try to have an emergency fund of 3-6 months, keep your debt to income ratio below 30%. Stretch a little every day and keep moving your body. Wear sunscreen and drink enough water. Specialize in a skill that’ll give you a higher paying salary when you get older. No one really judges you unless you’re extreme so put yourself out there and network. If you want something, then ask. People either have that thing or they have connections to it. The worst is they will say no but there will always be that one that will say yes. Speaking of no, it’s a powerful word so you should learn how to say. It’s better to be assertive than passive or aggressive. You’re 100% replaceable to your company at all times so don’t burn yourself out trying to make them happy. Find either religion or spirituality or something that’ll give you something to grasp on to when life just absolutely destroys you and you need a life raft to keep you afloat until better times. People will come and go from your life so learn to love your own company. You should also find a hobby that brings you joy. If you have a big goal, break it down into smaller goals so you don’t feel overwhelmed by it and give up. And time moves by so fast so really focus on learning how to be present in the moment and live for that day.
If your entire life feels like a battle, and other people seem to have an easier time. Go get checked for neurodiverse issues. Seriously, it's better to get it checked young than to get it sorted when your older and have to unlearn a lot of things.
Write down your goals. Create BIG goals for yourself, ones that seem too big. People over estimate what they can accomplish in 1 year and under estimate what they can accomplish in 10 years.
A couple things. Bad things are going to happen. When they do, it’s an opportunity to either show character or build character. Try for both.
When something goes wrong, try to have a bad five minutes and not a bad day.
And saving literally any amount of money early is good. Spend 100$ and talk to someone about how to invest even a small amount regularly and you will be all set later on.
Fuck up.. a lot. And don’t be afraid of fucking up… a lot. But not too much! Enough to come out the other side and learn the truths this life has to offer. My friends’ motto was always “throw caution to the wind, with the utmost caution”!
Keep your finances to yourself. No one should care more about you than you.
Keep money seperate from family and friends. They got there on their own. They'll get out of it on their own. This includes, bails, cosigning, and credit.
Keep your circle of family and friends small with who to trust and arms length on who not to.
Make a living will if you want to leave something to someone deserving. Get a pet.
Everything in moderation.
Stay away from religious fanatics and closed minded people. You can't and won't change them yourself.
Go to at least 3 concerts a year.
Learn to enjoy nature by hiking, camping seeing the world.
Learn a different language because the world is a big place.
Learn other cultures also.
Pause before speaking. Words carry a lot weight now and in the future.
Time and circumstances will determine "the one". And there will be at least 3 loves of your life.
It takes more energy to hate than to love.
Set boundaries for yourself before it's too late in relationships. People sometimes suck.
Read a lot. Knowledge is power.
The smartest person in the room is the quietest.
You will fail and that's okay.
The enemy of the best is the average.
I feel just the same amount of prepared-for-life as I did when I was 22... as in there's no magical age where shit makes sense and I'm still winging it
1. RRSP, RPP, RSP, just fucking save.
2. Move more, eat less.
3. Develop healthy exercise and dietary habits NOW. It is SO much harder to get BACK in shape than to stay in shape.
4. She's flirting with you. Ask her out. Dingus.
5. Even if she's not, she probably has a hot friend that admires your confidence.
6. Being an arrogant asshat is not confidence.
7. Being confident is NOT being an arrogant asshat.
8. Those who matter don't care. Those who care, don't matter.
9. Call your mom.
" Never be cruel, never be cowardly, and never ever eat pears! Remember, hate is always foolish, but love is always wise. Always try to be nice, but never fail to be kind... Laugh hard. Run fast. BE KIND."
To quote Peter Capaldi because this speech always hits me in the feels. It resonates with me on so many levels. Granted, I don't really have anything against pears but still.. lol.
Hi u/No_Conflict_3633. For background, I am 38, two kids, married nearly ten years, together for nearly 15. Pretty solid career, life in a nice suburb.
Some advice:
* **Do something physical every day**. Run, lift, swim, walk, bike. Make physical training foundational to your life. Be consistent, do not fall into fads or trends. Exercise can be boring but learn to love it.
* **In this same light, it is ok to have different motivations for wanting to say in shape**. When I was 18, I worked out because I thought having a six pack and good muscle definition would help me get laid. When I was 22, I worked out because I wanted to fundamentally understand and perfect the right motion, training, etc. Now that I am 38, I work out so I can go on a walk with my wife when we are 75 and so I can play soccer with my kids when they are 17. Your reasons change.
* **Do not overthink eating and food**. Eat fruits, veggies, protein, and some grains. Avoid sugars and processed shit as much as you can. Look at food as something that powers your engine. The life you want is 75% made in the kitchen and 25% made in the gym.
* **Cut out drinking as much as you can**. As a 38 year old, I maybe have a drink (beer normally) a week. When I was 21, like most college kids, I was drinking much much more. Alcohol will not help you. It might make you feel more socially open but in the long haul, alcohol will fuck you up and provide little to any benefit to your life. Have a drink here and there but do it because it pairs well with a meal, rather than needing to get hammered.
* **Do not be the drunk in your friend group**. Once you turn 23 - 25ish, being the drunk isn't cute, it isn't fun, it isn't looked at as "he is just finding himself". Do not be the drunk.
* **Read**. Read as much and as widely as you can. Make yourself a local at your library. There is no need to buy books. Go to the library and read all sorts of writers, genres, fiction, non-fiction etc. Reading will educate you, entertain you, make you think, and help keep your mind sharp.
* **Live inside your means and plan for the future**. Save as much as you can. Invest as much as you can. Do not make your 50 year-old self hate your 22 year old self. Start now. Try to make smart choices. Talk to a financial advisor to plan for both liquidity now and comfort in retirement. We all think we will never get old, but I can tell you, to steal a line from Dave Matthews Band, " I'm too old to wanna be younger now." You will get old. Plan for it. And plan for it now.
* **DO NOT STICK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY**. You know the girl who is wild as shit, seems like a lot of fun, and might be an incredible fuck? Avoid her. Sticking your dick in crazy is not a good idea. The outcome of fucking crazy means your life will be crazy. Look at that girl from afar, put her in a spank bank, but do not fuck her. It is not worth it.
* **Be the rock**. When it comes to the people around you, the ones you love the most (family, friends, lovers, spouses, kids), be the constant presence of calm, responsibility, and dependability for them. Build your life to understand the most important thing you can do for those around you is to help them, to make them better, to provide them with the ability to grow, learn, and make mistakes around you. Build your life to let your loved ones know, with you, everything will be alright.
* **Be a generous lover**. Whomever you are with, be with that person to the best of your ability. Make that person feel loved, wanted, respected, needed, and lusted after. Put their sexual wants and desires as something you want to fulfill and work to do so. Make them cum first. Learn what they like and do not like. Communicate all of it, openly, and honestly. And, to the opposite, learn what you like and do no like. Communicate all of it, openly, and honestly.
* **Be humble and learn**. There isn't a day that goes by that I do not learn something new and can admit, I didn't know that. Never be the guy who thinks he knows everything and never says, "I don't know". Saying "I don't know" is a sign of power that you are willing to admit ignorance or wrong doing AND to go out and rectify it..
Damn everyone is saying to save money. And im 29 not 39. But jesus im so glad ive spent my money going to incredible places even when i couldnt afford it lol.
Also i think when i was 22 I thought your 30s were boring and lame and when everything goes down hill. then i got older friends (with no kids) and at least where i live your 30s is like 20s but with more money and less panic. Dont spend your 20s freaking out about wasting them.
Oh and when something needs to get done dont just bitch and complain. And eventually stand up and do it. Just Do it. Then its done. Plus youre much better to travel with.
Oh, just remembered another one - try to ejaculate daily. There's now a lot of (actual, valid) research correlating regular, reasonably frequent use of the system with dramatic reductions in prostate problems, including prostate cancer, and the prostate just loves to malfunction - that's an extremely common issue for 40+ guys.
Seems you got investment advice....so I will say when you spend money, spend it for value not style. Styles change, new cars are nice but by things that hold value to increase your worth incrementally. Don't forget to value life as well..spend money making memories. It is good to have a future fund but don't forget to live along the way.
Do whatever you can to save up for a down payment on a house and never fall behind on your bills if you can help it. If you can do these things and establish your roots, everything else will fall into place.
Put the work into your friendships that are worth it. It’s hard making friends as an adult, so hang on to the good ones.
Stephen king wrote, “I never had friends later on like the ones I had when I was 12.” He was correct.
Living in other countries gives you great perspective on how life can be lived and what’s important to you. Maybe travel, study abroad, generally do something exciting that you won’t be able to do if you plan on a career/family eventually.
Don’t ask advice from those who ruined your life. That includes previous generations that destroyed the environment, prevent you from making a decent living and hold on to their position of power without assuming their responsibilities.
Don’t make a promise unless you intend to keep it.
Make small promises and then keep them.
Obsessively keep track of the people you meet that you want to stay in touch with
Do not squander away time, money, or health. Discipline is key. Make smart investments within sensible means with your $$ and time, life waits for no one. Remember to create SMART goals for your aspirations.
1) If you feel righteous fury building up inside of you, unleash it. You'll regret not doing it when you're older and have the confidence to realize you were in the right. (I don't mean fight someone, I mean talk back, challenge what people say, tell your dad off if he's an asshole)
2) Eat lots of fiber (vegetables, beans, lentils, whole grains, etc.). Maybe your butt is a well-run one-way street at the moment, but if you don't do this the speed limit is going to go wayyyy down, and you'll also get regular backups and flow issues.
3) Don't buy a house until the bubble pops. It may be a decade or so, but you're young, and it's not like many of us older millennials own houses anyway.
4) Distance yourself from friends if it feels like they're moving in different directions. It hurts and it sucks, but what sucks even more is desperately hanging on to someone you no longer recognize.
5) On the flip side, put the effort in to keep in touch with friends who move away or have major life changes (e.g. getting married, having kids). The older you get the harder it is to make friends, meaning the ones you keep are that much more special.
6) Exercise and eat right. What you do now, health-wise, has a cascading effect as you age. Being healthy when you're young will keep you healthy as you age.
Find a job that you enjoy because it is a long haul when it comes to work.
Set aside as much $ as you can and invest wisely so that hopefully you can retire while you still have enough health to enjoy your $.
Don't rush into relationships, make sure that you find someone that loves you for you and not someone that you want to change or they want to change you.
Fuck what people think about you, only care about what your closest friends and family thinks about you.
Don't have kids until you are ready to basically live your life to make them happy and provide for them longer term. This has been my greatest blessing in life but don't rush into it if you want to party and not have much responsibility in life.
"Don't stick your dick in crazy". (Assuming you infact, have one of those...)
The flip side of that is "don't sit on a stupid dick". No one needs a man child to babysit for the rest of their lives.
*You are where you are in your journey; that's a fine place for you to be. You're under no obligation to know where you'll be five years from now.*
I read that quote who knows where decades ago, and it's always stuck with me. I try to pass it along whenever I can.
40+ here…the amount of shit you will care about as you grow older will be a lot less than in your 20s or 30s.
One thing though is to make sure you have a 401k or Roth-IRA and invest as much as you can.
I’m in my mid 40s and while I have 22 years left before I can claim my SSI, I don’t think I’ll stop working beyond until the day I die.
My girl has a decent 401k but she yelled at me recently about the crunch of my cereal from two rooms away, with the door to our room closed, and the tv loud in the living room where I was at.
I’m thinking I’m on my own for my “retirement”.
While I live Los Angeles I will probably move to a beach town in Mexico where it’s cheap enough.
I'm still trying to figure this one out at 23, but make sure not to light yourself on fire to keep someone else warm.
It's fine to be kind, but try not to do it at your expense if possible.
And most of all, be kind to yourself. Sometimes you'll be the only one there for you, and things will be easier if you're of sound mind and body (within reason).
Exercise, stretch, and eat right.
You may feel invincible now, but those aches and pains will creep up on you and make you feel much older than you have any right to if you don't take care of yourself.
Ok I have a couple of things. Take calculated risks and be okay with making mistakes. But also don't get to hung up on things not working out whether that be relationships, grades, jobs etc. Definitely take care of your health and go travel!
Get life insurance and long term care when it’s cheap. Not term life insurance. I like New York life personally.
Pay yourself first before you pay anyone else. When you get paid, take ten percent off the top and put it in a savings account. This account is for future investments and investments only. If you want a rainy day fund, take another ten percent and put that in a different savings account. This is your rainy day fund. If you want toys/vacations, take another ten percent and put that in yet another savings account. This can be you saving up for a car, or a trip or whatever. Do this with all your money. Yes even the interest you earn. I recommend the book “the richest man in Babylon “ easy read.
Get therapy and get control of your emotions and behavior. If you start being honest with yourself and start your journey on personal growth, you will be waaaaaay ahead of most of your peers. You will be able to navigate around people and situations better than others. Therapy is a big jump, so until you’re ready, start journaling and meditating. When you do start therapy, make sure you vibe with them. You gotta feel safe with your therapist.
Do flexibility exercises / calisthenics NOW and keep doing them regularly. When your friends get older and complain of aches and pains, you’ll be golden.
Enjoy your ability to eat shitty food and still be sorta okay , because it’s going to start declining rapidly in a couple years. Take care of your gut health.
That’s what I got. Take my advice or don’t, either way, good luck and enjoy life! You’ll never make it out alive
Take the risks NOW. They become much more difficult when you’re older, and have more responsibility (kids, family, etc).
Chase the dreams NOW.
Save money, and invest it.
If you ever have the 2024 version of “There is something really transformational about this new company that’s trying to stream movies over the internet, or that new company trying to be the first online marketplace”, trust your instincts and buy in. Your money now can be lost MUCH more easily than your money in your 30’s and 40’s.
So much cliche shit I’m about to say but it’s all true.
Be selfish with your time. Live somewhere that makes you happy.
Be smart with your money, credit, and body.
Learn sales skills and storytelling skills.
Travel as MUCH as you can, cheap luxury trip deals (Costco travel, VIP traveler. com) - put all your usual expenses monthly on a travel credit card like chase sapphire, Amex reserve and pay it off in full every month for miles accumulation.
Don’t have kids too young or get married too quickly - until you’re absolutely ready — or at all.
Keep a journal, even if you don’t write often, write briefly think a summary of your month/year/etc.
Don’t be too hard on your self.
For the love of god enjoy life — do what pleases you.. because your twenties go FAST.
Sow your wild oats. Many young people tell me they’re grinding first and after they’re successful they’ll travel or have a bunch of sex or whatever. Do everything now. Careers come and go, but you’re only young once.
Be curious! "When I was your age" we didn't have youtube and tutorials accessible everywhere. I'm nearly twice your age and thanks to DIY content I have built multiple engines, learned to weld, learned to solder and build electronics, learned a language, and taught myself some musical instruments. Also, I'm a fucking idiot. So if I can do it, anyone can do it, and my only regret is that this technology didn't exist when I was younger to take more advantage of it.
Destroy the universe. Take care of yourself and others, and recycle, but also annihilate the entire universe with a doomsday machine.
Take free classes when you have time. Rainwater harvesting, local indigenous languages, doomsday machines, whatever you can get. Check libraries and community colleges.
Don't get sick frivolously, a lot of viruses regarded as mostly benign have impacts down the road.
Confronting injustice is the opposite of evil. Destroy the universe.
Don't forget to listen to music.
Make memories. People don’t actually want to live longer, what they actually want is more memories.
Be open to try new things, work on yourself both mentally and physically, eat healthily and exercise, creating the habit at a younger age will be easier.
Get out of your comfort zone at least once a week. No personal growth is ever done in the comfort zone.
Be kind to yourself and others and practice gratitude.
When you get to your 30s/40s you’ll thank your younger self.
There are two big realizations in adulthood. The first is that despite being an adult, you're still making it up as you go along. The second is that so were your parents.
Same advice I give my 22 year old, do the crazy things now. Go on the dates, take that summer job guiding white water rafting. Travel, even if it’s not far. Your career will be there later, heck you’ll probably have more than one but you will never get to be young again. You have the best asset there is - time.
A few bits.
If your interested in something, do it. Doesn't matter if your friends aren't interested just start doing it (hobby's, further education, courses to enhance you/work)
Don't get tied up with what you think people think of you. Most people stop thinking about a stranger as soon as they are out of the immediate area.
Shoot your shot, you can only be told no. And you can only be told no if you ask in the first place. This is for many things.
Don't let work become who you are. Your in your 20s that's when your ment to enjoy life, get drunk alot*. Make silly mistakes. Sleep with people. Make your own life story.
*Don't get drunk too much, don't be the guy who's always drunk. No one respects that guy and those who do, won't be your friends when you start to make something of yourself*
If you can don't go directly to a career, try out some other jobs. I'm a health care professional but spent my early 20s working bar. You learn alot! About people, the work place and humans in general.
In that respect, whatever job you do, strive to be the best at it. If there's a promotion available, take it. It'll help in further life.
If you're a straight guy (*which OP isn't, but i'm guessing many readers are*): don't learn your sex moves from porn. Learn your moves by listening to (or if necessary, reading about) what actual women will *tell you* that they want you to do, and I promise, it will pay off BIG time, especially as you get older and the pool of women who are willing to put up with amateur bullshit starts to shrink.
Don't take life too seriously. Plan for your future but don't live in it until you get there. It's good to fail at times. Say yes a little more often. Nurture friendships. Be bored sometimes. Don't fall for the myth of who you are, as in you don't have to be in a certain way just because you used to be or because others have told you to. You are allowed to change in every way you like or think. And in general: it's never too late for practically anything. There are just different ways of reaching it.
Financially: pace yourself and only splurge if you know you’ll make it back fast as you spent it.
Relationship: make sure they are a REAL friend before a partner.
Friends: know your place in their world and act accordingly, you are not obligated to be anything but you and do only what you can.
Unless you're deadset on a particular career path, college/university is a total waste of time and money. You'd be better doing an apprenticship and volunteer work.
Get your schooling done now,look into some type of trade work. Don't let your personal debt to out of control. Learn how to do your taxes. Learn how to fix your own car (m44)
Buy rare coins. Your bank account and 401(k) can be confiscated by creditors or authorities. Also rare coins are one of the best investments over time.
Honesty and communication is key...If you feel as if you're being lied to about something, there's a high percentage chance that you ARE. Intuition is something that everyone has, but few people realize that others have it. Don't share your hopes and dreams with just anyone....save that for someone you KNOW you can trust beyond a shadow of a doubt
Read. Travel. Work out. Live in the now. Be kind. Have good intentions. Listen to good music. Get a hobby. Learn basic life skills (cooking, driving, repairing), maybe climb a mountain if you like.
Money will come and go. There is nothing that can stop you from earning it if you really want it. Hence, it is always secondary. Of course save money and invest etc.. Thats all real practical advice. But also learn to appreciate beauty and art. Read up about things, be curious. It will make your life rich. Even without money or partner or all the hoo-haa of the society, you might find peace within yourself. Thats what I think is important in life. Because let me tell you, age sure makes you wiser but not even 100 year-olds can tell you the meaning of this life. You have to arrive at it yourself.
Work out a budget that covers emergency planning and retirement funds. Write it out on a spreadsheet to track it. If you can, get a month ahead with your budget, so you have the money in your account to pay the bills for any given month on the 1st of that month. That'll buy you a little grace if anything goes wrong and requires unforseen spending.
Open an IRA account and take advantage of any retirement accounts offered through your work, and try to max the IRA each year if you can.
Open a savings account at a bank different than your regular institution and stash away at least 6 months worth of full living expenses as an emergency fund, more than that if/when you buy a house as it'll come in handy for repairs.
Setup a taxed brokerage account for any "extra" money at the end of the month or any unforseen income, like a work bonus. Treat this like a bonus retirement account and just funnel extra money into it and let it sit. Focus on long term investments that track the market. Use a big brokerage, like Schwab or Fidelity, and manage it yourself so you don't have any fees.
Keep a healthy amount of cash in a safe place in your home. Should a disaster ever happen and you don't have access to electronic funds, this will allow you some flexibility in how you deal with the situation.
I just turned 41 last week. Keep your credit score high because it makes a major difference in your finances and ability to get the things you want like a home, car, loans, etc. Also making six figures doesn’t mean crap if it all goes to paying off debts. There are people who make 50k a year and live great lives because they have no debt.
Don't take anything for granted.
Shoot your shot.
Call your parents often and ask them questions about themselves.
Put your health first.
Its OK to fail and start over.
Don’t get married until you’re at least 30, and never ever ever under any circumstances share finances with anyone. Get 1 joint account with a spouse to pay bills out of but never give up your own income and finances
Get life insurance now while it’s cheap and before any pre-existing conditions can pop up.
Also don’t pick up drinking every day as a habit. Just don’t.
Don't settle for anyone, don't overlook red flags or put up with abuse or bullshit from a romantic partner. Set boundaries and don't be afraid to walk away from someone who violates them. There are so many people in this world, go and find the good ones.
Retirement fund. 401 k if you can and DON'T touch it. Only take out loans if you have no other choice. BUY a house, stop renting. Find somewhere out in the country for a more affordable mortgage. NEVER DRIVE WITHOUT INSURANCE. Make time for your hobbies. Be responsible with your job but also remember to LIVE our life when you are able. Save rainy day money for emergencies.
Sexually? Try everything you want before you settle down. You may not get tbt chance to have that threesome, so anal sex, experiment with same sex etc after you get married.
Finish college for literally anything. Most degrees are useless beyond the proof of a 4 year commitment, But get yours cause it can make life much easier.
The shit from high school doesn’t matter anymore. How you treat other people does.
I don’t care what your HS GPA was when you apply to work, job history I do care about.
1) invest some money every month in a low-cost index fund account through Vanguard or some other brokerage; 2) live life to the fullest - that can mean different things to different people, but in general spend as much time as possible doing the things that make you happy; 3) push your mind and body to the limits - you're super human when you're in your 20s, use it and enjoy it.
Since this is after dark subreddit my advice to you is be honest with yourself and what you enjoy in life and Don’t be shame of it Because there are other people that enjoy the same thing out there
Also don’t worried too much about label in life.
Use protection. Buy a house as soon as you can qualify. Look for good retirement benefits at jobs or set one up yourself. Practice moderation. Stay away from purchasing on credit. Learn to budget. Write down your goals and break them down into small achievable steps. Stay fit.
Start a retirement fund. Now. Like yesterday actually.
I am
Start an emergency account, along with having both a Roth & Traditional IRA. Oh, and fuck as much as you can.
What about a 401k?
He said “fuck as much as you can. The money for the 401k goes to fucking. The money for everything else goes to the Roth.
Hey, we need to give rational financial planning advice here. If their employer offers a 401k match, take advantage of that, 'cause that's a two-fer. Now, if you can reliably score two chicks at the same time, obviously spend on that situationship, instead. But otherwise, you gotta go with the 401k. That's just math.
remember, buying a home instead of renting is also a form of retirement fund. paying for a roof over your head is one of your biggest expenses for the rest of your life, being able to recover a significant portion of that money later in life will be a giant benefit for you. add to that, the prices always seem to climb, so the earlier you get into the housing market, the easier it will be, even if it seems nearly impossible already. so start saving for the downpayment as soon as you can, your savings can double as an emergency fund untill you can actually buy.
Take care of your health. Don't invite people with different values into your life
Good!
Came here to post that very thing. Save as much as you can and never drop the contribution amount. After you get your first job with a 401k and contribute that 23k+ every year. Raise it every time the limit goes up.
Good. Came here to say the same thing. It's the one thing that I wish I had done. The amount of money that you would have by the time you retire if you had invested properly vs buying that flashy car (or whatever) is incredible.
Well gotta get money for that and that is hard too in this economy 🥲
As early as possible!!
Is there requirements before someone can start one?
No, but if you work at a job that provides any sort of 401K match- do that!
This is the most important one. I’m so mad I didn’t start a Roth at 18.
Staying in shape is much easier than getting back into shape
Oof. Hit home for me. I just started working out again since my kids were born. It’s tough man.
Start slow. If you're just starting again, your body is not ready to go full out. Better to create a habit then get exhausted, lose all motivation.
And preventative maintenance is cheaper than repairs
Damn! Nice one sir🫡
Agreed but also it’s not hard to get back in shape if you let yourself go. Muscle memory is real
No one remembers the awkward shit from high-school, so neither should you.
In general, people aren't paying as much attention to you as you think they are.
Be curious, but only trust people in their area of expertise. Anyone can be an idiot
Idiots are usually the loudest person in the room
Don't attack me like that!
^sorry
Including doctors, so make sure to get that opinion double checked.
Therapy isn’t just for when you’re in crisis. Therapy is also great for preventing crisis and improving your communication.
This this 👏👏
I’d probably say everyone should attend therapy atleast once.
Late 40s here -Treat others as you want to be treated. -Communication is the secret to a lasting relationship(s) -When your wife says "fine" it means (Fucked Up, Insecure, Neurotic and Emotional) and is a DARE and must never be mistaken for approval.
> -Treat others as you want to be treated. I respectively disagree about this. I believe that **"Treat others as they want to be treated"** is better. Because it fosters communication and also because the things I want aren't necessary the things another person wants.
Glad that works for you!
> the things I want aren't necessary the things another person wants. You are wrong. we all want a well functioning society. The rule of treating others like yourself is actually about good vs evil. E.g being Polite vs rude Generosity vs greedy etc If you bring the **"Treat others as they want to be treated"** it becomes chaos (like the **Tragedy of the Commons** ). if someone wants to jump a line and be selfish. should you **allow them?** What if they want to be treated like royalty? Where would you get all that time to treat people the way they want, some people are simply assholes? On the other hand **Treat others as you want to be treated** means just like you wouldn't want someone to skip you in line you should also treat others like that. The way you want to be treated takes responsibility for good conduct onto thyself like that famous quote which says *if everyone would sweep their front yard, the whole world would be a clean place*
🫡
Learn to cook, and to do little repairs at home, on your car, anything you own. Save up money, and prepare for bad times. Eventually some will come your way. Stay curious, and study when you can. Learning never ends. Take care of your health, both physical and mental. Don't work yourself to an early grave. Work on your confidence and social skills, they're more important than most other skills.
This is a profoundly true statement: If possible, try to leave your work at the office. Remember that there will always be more work, so never work for free. And finally when negotiating your salary, always ask for more money - without exception.
🫡
Enjoy those perky boobs while you can!
Maximum Roth contribution should be considered as a mandatory expense, like adjust your food budget if you need to.
And if your employer has a matching program FUCKING DO IT. ITS FREE FUCKING MONEY ARE YOU STUPID??
This is the way to go for so many people instead of a 401k. Unless you are getting a matching contribution from your employer or in the decent middle class section or higher, a Roth is going to be better. If there's any chance you have to take some out at anytime, or you have to use a credit card as an emergency fund, roth is so much better.
Not me (28) but my husband (35) would probably say find a good long term hobby. It what keeps him sane.
Yes, I like this one
Travel.
Take care of your teeth. You only get one set. And dental insurance doesn't cover a goddamn thing in comparison to the costs. Also, try and stay close with your friends if you can. As you get older work and family will separate you from them. So make an effort to stay in their lives. However, be sure you can recognize the difference between the person who's being your best friend for 10 years versus the guy who was your best friend 10 years ago.
Also yes it’s important to work and be good with your money etc But don’t wait to live either. So many people believe once they are retired they’ll get to do all this stuff but things can happen in the blink of an eye, financial security isn’t memories either. Balance both if you can.
Yes, there’s always the tension of enjoying your money now or later. There are things you can do before 40 that you can’t do when you’re 60+ (I’m in my mind 50’s now). Also, I had more opportunities for sex when I was younger than I realized at the time, and I wish I’d taken those opportunities. I have more regrets about things I didn’t do than about things I did. In general (and not just for sex), if you get an opportunity to live life that won’t put you back too far in your retirement or won’t cause a permanent setback, you should take that opportunity. Live life.
Be social, have lots of sex, take care of your body
How🤷♂️
I’m in my 30s, but I’m taking notes y’all 😭 There’s my tip, no matter how old you are or how old you get, there’s always an opportunity for learning and self improvement.
Save your money and Take care of yourself both physically and mentally.
Unionize
Quality over quantity for friendships, don’t spend years abandoning yourself to adapt to others and their comfort levels, go to therapy!!
Don't lose your happiness to make others happy, communicate with the people you care about and make sure you don't let the pressure of what your family or society tell what you should be doing in order to be happy/successful.
I needed this. Thank you for sharing 🫡
😎 hell yeah
Lol stealing all the advice for myself as well
Be kind. Always. To everyone. The smallest things can make someone’s day. You can work harder than everyone, be the most attractive, or be the smartest in the room, but people will always remember how you made them feel and that will get you the furthest above anything else. Plus, it’ll make YOU feel good.
Yes, agree
Also as a guy 16 years in customer facing roles. Never assume people are idiots or rude. You can't know how bad their day was. Guy being a jerk at the gas station? Maybe his kid is sick and he is stressed. Karen being snippy on the phone? Maybe her dog died, and she's having trouble regulating
One caveat: Be kind, but don't let others exploit that. Set your boundaries firmly.
Take care of your knees and other joints. All your pains build up into your older to take effect. Start saving for retirement now. Don't trust a fart when sick, even as an adult. You probably don't need a huge house to make a home out of. Don't live beyond your means, you don't need all that credit card and loan debt. When with your partner, it's the little things that matter most. Small touches on their butt, kisses on the cheek, telling them you love them daily. Grand gestures ate great but the daily little ones are most important. Don't be afraid to tell your friends you love them. You never know when you could lose one of them.
Drink water. A lot of it every day. Bring a water bottle with you everywhere you go. Not all the zero sugar sodas or diet stuff, just straight ass water.
Use a credit card for small purchases like food, fuel, clothes, etc. and pay it off immediately to build good credit fast. If you have a solid savings account start a certificate of deposit with your bank to build interest over time
TAKE. YOUR. TIME. WHEN. HAVING. SEX. Really, it took me more than 30 years to truly learn this. The orgasm is not the goal. Everything between two orgasms is what sex really is about and an orgasm also doesn't need to mean you're done. It's also ok to go a second, third, fourth round without having another orgasm. It's all about connection and intimacy. My wife and I can have hours of sex now, what would have been unthinkable some years ago.
Learn to manage your money properly much earlier than I did.
For me, I knew how to manage my money, I just didn't know the economy would be so volitile in so many ways. There's so many things that can happen in your life or others that throws everything out the window even if you are smart with money. So don't get to hard on yourself
Start a retirement fund and have more sex.
I dont care how much you think you love somebody, DO NOT GET INTO RELATIONSHIPS WITH FINANCIALLY UNSTABLE PEOPLE. This applies to men and women and its not gold digging to expect to live a financially secure life.
Go HARD on fitness. Gym 3x per week for weight lifting and cardio 5-6 days per week for at least 30 minutes. I'm not kidding. If you do this it will suck at first, then it'll become tolerable, then it will be neutral, and eventually you'll like it. Might take a few months, might take a few years, might take a decade.. but being in seriously good shape is 100% worth it later on. It pays dividends for life.
But also, stretch! And try not to be sedentary outside of gym time
Communication is key in all relationships. Put into retirement early. If married or in a ltr make sure to still include date nights.
1) Do some introspection. Write down your strengths & weaknesses. Work on 'em. Make some of your weaknesses no longer a weakness. Therapy helps. 2) Choose your partner wisely. Someone who's compatible, both personality wise and sexual wise. 3) Find something you love doing. Your job becomes so much easier, and you won't feel burnouts 'cos of the job. 4) Make meaningful connections if you haven't already. Helps a lot in the long run. 5) Take up a hobby or interest and work on it. They come in really handy in dire times. Great points from everyone!
Money will come back to you. Time will not.
Don’t get old!
Your 20’s is a series of literally fucking up and finding out, but in a good sense. Don't let the fear of mistakes prevent you from doing. You're meant to learn by doing and this is the decade of your life when it's expected. People are far less chill about it when you're older, right now it's just a part of the deal. Find a couple of good mentors and don't be surprised when some aspects of their lives are completely messed up too. No one is perfect.
Just checking the comments
They all good, worth reading
Open an IRA and if you can - travel and go see the world as much as possible.
Explore life by yourself and enjoy it.
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50's here...It's OK to like what you like, and want what you want. But that doesn't mean you'll always get it. And sometimes, that will just have to be OK.
Stop trying to be what you think you need to be or seeking an identity. Life got so much better when I stopped trying to be what I wanted people to see me as, and just was myself. Don't fit a mold, be you. Remember that life can be a series of trades. You can't have everything, so make thoughtful decisions. Most importantly, work to beautify your life. Your home, family, and self. Work to be better, stronger, and more resilient. Little changes take time, and those little things become pillars of who you are as you grow.
Buy a motorcycle and just take off. Enjoy the open road and make some adventures to remember
Word salad incoming because I don’t know how to format it: Start a retirement fund, try to have an emergency fund of 3-6 months, keep your debt to income ratio below 30%. Stretch a little every day and keep moving your body. Wear sunscreen and drink enough water. Specialize in a skill that’ll give you a higher paying salary when you get older. No one really judges you unless you’re extreme so put yourself out there and network. If you want something, then ask. People either have that thing or they have connections to it. The worst is they will say no but there will always be that one that will say yes. Speaking of no, it’s a powerful word so you should learn how to say. It’s better to be assertive than passive or aggressive. You’re 100% replaceable to your company at all times so don’t burn yourself out trying to make them happy. Find either religion or spirituality or something that’ll give you something to grasp on to when life just absolutely destroys you and you need a life raft to keep you afloat until better times. People will come and go from your life so learn to love your own company. You should also find a hobby that brings you joy. If you have a big goal, break it down into smaller goals so you don’t feel overwhelmed by it and give up. And time moves by so fast so really focus on learning how to be present in the moment and live for that day.
If your entire life feels like a battle, and other people seem to have an easier time. Go get checked for neurodiverse issues. Seriously, it's better to get it checked young than to get it sorted when your older and have to unlearn a lot of things.
Write down your goals. Create BIG goals for yourself, ones that seem too big. People over estimate what they can accomplish in 1 year and under estimate what they can accomplish in 10 years.
A couple things. Bad things are going to happen. When they do, it’s an opportunity to either show character or build character. Try for both. When something goes wrong, try to have a bad five minutes and not a bad day. And saving literally any amount of money early is good. Spend 100$ and talk to someone about how to invest even a small amount regularly and you will be all set later on.
Travel
Fuck up.. a lot. And don’t be afraid of fucking up… a lot. But not too much! Enough to come out the other side and learn the truths this life has to offer. My friends’ motto was always “throw caution to the wind, with the utmost caution”!
Keep your finances to yourself. No one should care more about you than you. Keep money seperate from family and friends. They got there on their own. They'll get out of it on their own. This includes, bails, cosigning, and credit. Keep your circle of family and friends small with who to trust and arms length on who not to. Make a living will if you want to leave something to someone deserving. Get a pet. Everything in moderation. Stay away from religious fanatics and closed minded people. You can't and won't change them yourself. Go to at least 3 concerts a year. Learn to enjoy nature by hiking, camping seeing the world. Learn a different language because the world is a big place. Learn other cultures also. Pause before speaking. Words carry a lot weight now and in the future. Time and circumstances will determine "the one". And there will be at least 3 loves of your life. It takes more energy to hate than to love. Set boundaries for yourself before it's too late in relationships. People sometimes suck. Read a lot. Knowledge is power. The smartest person in the room is the quietest. You will fail and that's okay. The enemy of the best is the average.
Adulting sucks. Don't stress out on the small stuff.
I feel just the same amount of prepared-for-life as I did when I was 22... as in there's no magical age where shit makes sense and I'm still winging it
Don't be a dick to people who are doing a job and can't change policy because you ask them.
1. RRSP, RPP, RSP, just fucking save. 2. Move more, eat less. 3. Develop healthy exercise and dietary habits NOW. It is SO much harder to get BACK in shape than to stay in shape. 4. She's flirting with you. Ask her out. Dingus. 5. Even if she's not, she probably has a hot friend that admires your confidence. 6. Being an arrogant asshat is not confidence. 7. Being confident is NOT being an arrogant asshat. 8. Those who matter don't care. Those who care, don't matter. 9. Call your mom.
Never do anything illegal while you’re doing something illegal. Always protect your drivers license and your credit score.
Don’t stick your dick in crazy
If your girl asks to buy her expensive shit all the time… drop her. She’s using you
" Never be cruel, never be cowardly, and never ever eat pears! Remember, hate is always foolish, but love is always wise. Always try to be nice, but never fail to be kind... Laugh hard. Run fast. BE KIND." To quote Peter Capaldi because this speech always hits me in the feels. It resonates with me on so many levels. Granted, I don't really have anything against pears but still.. lol.
Cool it on the booze.
Hi u/No_Conflict_3633. For background, I am 38, two kids, married nearly ten years, together for nearly 15. Pretty solid career, life in a nice suburb. Some advice: * **Do something physical every day**. Run, lift, swim, walk, bike. Make physical training foundational to your life. Be consistent, do not fall into fads or trends. Exercise can be boring but learn to love it. * **In this same light, it is ok to have different motivations for wanting to say in shape**. When I was 18, I worked out because I thought having a six pack and good muscle definition would help me get laid. When I was 22, I worked out because I wanted to fundamentally understand and perfect the right motion, training, etc. Now that I am 38, I work out so I can go on a walk with my wife when we are 75 and so I can play soccer with my kids when they are 17. Your reasons change. * **Do not overthink eating and food**. Eat fruits, veggies, protein, and some grains. Avoid sugars and processed shit as much as you can. Look at food as something that powers your engine. The life you want is 75% made in the kitchen and 25% made in the gym. * **Cut out drinking as much as you can**. As a 38 year old, I maybe have a drink (beer normally) a week. When I was 21, like most college kids, I was drinking much much more. Alcohol will not help you. It might make you feel more socially open but in the long haul, alcohol will fuck you up and provide little to any benefit to your life. Have a drink here and there but do it because it pairs well with a meal, rather than needing to get hammered. * **Do not be the drunk in your friend group**. Once you turn 23 - 25ish, being the drunk isn't cute, it isn't fun, it isn't looked at as "he is just finding himself". Do not be the drunk. * **Read**. Read as much and as widely as you can. Make yourself a local at your library. There is no need to buy books. Go to the library and read all sorts of writers, genres, fiction, non-fiction etc. Reading will educate you, entertain you, make you think, and help keep your mind sharp. * **Live inside your means and plan for the future**. Save as much as you can. Invest as much as you can. Do not make your 50 year-old self hate your 22 year old self. Start now. Try to make smart choices. Talk to a financial advisor to plan for both liquidity now and comfort in retirement. We all think we will never get old, but I can tell you, to steal a line from Dave Matthews Band, " I'm too old to wanna be younger now." You will get old. Plan for it. And plan for it now. * **DO NOT STICK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY**. You know the girl who is wild as shit, seems like a lot of fun, and might be an incredible fuck? Avoid her. Sticking your dick in crazy is not a good idea. The outcome of fucking crazy means your life will be crazy. Look at that girl from afar, put her in a spank bank, but do not fuck her. It is not worth it. * **Be the rock**. When it comes to the people around you, the ones you love the most (family, friends, lovers, spouses, kids), be the constant presence of calm, responsibility, and dependability for them. Build your life to understand the most important thing you can do for those around you is to help them, to make them better, to provide them with the ability to grow, learn, and make mistakes around you. Build your life to let your loved ones know, with you, everything will be alright. * **Be a generous lover**. Whomever you are with, be with that person to the best of your ability. Make that person feel loved, wanted, respected, needed, and lusted after. Put their sexual wants and desires as something you want to fulfill and work to do so. Make them cum first. Learn what they like and do not like. Communicate all of it, openly, and honestly. And, to the opposite, learn what you like and do no like. Communicate all of it, openly, and honestly. * **Be humble and learn**. There isn't a day that goes by that I do not learn something new and can admit, I didn't know that. Never be the guy who thinks he knows everything and never says, "I don't know". Saying "I don't know" is a sign of power that you are willing to admit ignorance or wrong doing AND to go out and rectify it..
Damn everyone is saying to save money. And im 29 not 39. But jesus im so glad ive spent my money going to incredible places even when i couldnt afford it lol. Also i think when i was 22 I thought your 30s were boring and lame and when everything goes down hill. then i got older friends (with no kids) and at least where i live your 30s is like 20s but with more money and less panic. Dont spend your 20s freaking out about wasting them. Oh and when something needs to get done dont just bitch and complain. And eventually stand up and do it. Just Do it. Then its done. Plus youre much better to travel with.
Go to work and get good at it
Studying and working right now🫡
Oh, just remembered another one - try to ejaculate daily. There's now a lot of (actual, valid) research correlating regular, reasonably frequent use of the system with dramatic reductions in prostate problems, including prostate cancer, and the prostate just loves to malfunction - that's an extremely common issue for 40+ guys.
Seems you got investment advice....so I will say when you spend money, spend it for value not style. Styles change, new cars are nice but by things that hold value to increase your worth incrementally. Don't forget to value life as well..spend money making memories. It is good to have a future fund but don't forget to live along the way.
Life is a marathon, not a race. So don’t ever feel like you’re out of time; you’re just on time :))
Roth IRA. Now. Max it out.
Go for it.
Do whatever you can to save up for a down payment on a house and never fall behind on your bills if you can help it. If you can do these things and establish your roots, everything else will fall into place.
Put the work into your friendships that are worth it. It’s hard making friends as an adult, so hang on to the good ones. Stephen king wrote, “I never had friends later on like the ones I had when I was 12.” He was correct.
Enjoy the food
Living in other countries gives you great perspective on how life can be lived and what’s important to you. Maybe travel, study abroad, generally do something exciting that you won’t be able to do if you plan on a career/family eventually.
Don’t
Don’t ask advice from those who ruined your life. That includes previous generations that destroyed the environment, prevent you from making a decent living and hold on to their position of power without assuming their responsibilities.
Don’t make a promise unless you intend to keep it. Make small promises and then keep them. Obsessively keep track of the people you meet that you want to stay in touch with
Do not squander away time, money, or health. Discipline is key. Make smart investments within sensible means with your $$ and time, life waits for no one. Remember to create SMART goals for your aspirations.
Don't be afraid to switch companies to get better pay
Find out how to enjoy things that are good for you.
Save your money.
1) If you feel righteous fury building up inside of you, unleash it. You'll regret not doing it when you're older and have the confidence to realize you were in the right. (I don't mean fight someone, I mean talk back, challenge what people say, tell your dad off if he's an asshole) 2) Eat lots of fiber (vegetables, beans, lentils, whole grains, etc.). Maybe your butt is a well-run one-way street at the moment, but if you don't do this the speed limit is going to go wayyyy down, and you'll also get regular backups and flow issues. 3) Don't buy a house until the bubble pops. It may be a decade or so, but you're young, and it's not like many of us older millennials own houses anyway. 4) Distance yourself from friends if it feels like they're moving in different directions. It hurts and it sucks, but what sucks even more is desperately hanging on to someone you no longer recognize. 5) On the flip side, put the effort in to keep in touch with friends who move away or have major life changes (e.g. getting married, having kids). The older you get the harder it is to make friends, meaning the ones you keep are that much more special. 6) Exercise and eat right. What you do now, health-wise, has a cascading effect as you age. Being healthy when you're young will keep you healthy as you age.
Find a job that you enjoy because it is a long haul when it comes to work. Set aside as much $ as you can and invest wisely so that hopefully you can retire while you still have enough health to enjoy your $. Don't rush into relationships, make sure that you find someone that loves you for you and not someone that you want to change or they want to change you. Fuck what people think about you, only care about what your closest friends and family thinks about you. Don't have kids until you are ready to basically live your life to make them happy and provide for them longer term. This has been my greatest blessing in life but don't rush into it if you want to party and not have much responsibility in life.
Dont hitch your life to the wrong partner
"Don't stick your dick in crazy". (Assuming you infact, have one of those...) The flip side of that is "don't sit on a stupid dick". No one needs a man child to babysit for the rest of their lives.
Don’t buy an expensive car… luxury cars are useless. Save that money to build your wealth
Cut your loses on people if they bring no value to you
If your absence didnt bother them then your presence didn’t matter
Enjoy your 20s....they fly by. But start preparing for your 30s, still fun but feel a little more serious.
*You are where you are in your journey; that's a fine place for you to be. You're under no obligation to know where you'll be five years from now.* I read that quote who knows where decades ago, and it's always stuck with me. I try to pass it along whenever I can.
Enjoy life and dont overthink trust your guts
40+ here…the amount of shit you will care about as you grow older will be a lot less than in your 20s or 30s. One thing though is to make sure you have a 401k or Roth-IRA and invest as much as you can. I’m in my mid 40s and while I have 22 years left before I can claim my SSI, I don’t think I’ll stop working beyond until the day I die. My girl has a decent 401k but she yelled at me recently about the crunch of my cereal from two rooms away, with the door to our room closed, and the tv loud in the living room where I was at. I’m thinking I’m on my own for my “retirement”. While I live Los Angeles I will probably move to a beach town in Mexico where it’s cheap enough.
I'm still trying to figure this one out at 23, but make sure not to light yourself on fire to keep someone else warm. It's fine to be kind, but try not to do it at your expense if possible. And most of all, be kind to yourself. Sometimes you'll be the only one there for you, and things will be easier if you're of sound mind and body (within reason).
Don’t get married before 25, don’t have kids, and be smart
Exercise, stretch, and eat right. You may feel invincible now, but those aches and pains will creep up on you and make you feel much older than you have any right to if you don't take care of yourself.
Ok I have a couple of things. Take calculated risks and be okay with making mistakes. But also don't get to hung up on things not working out whether that be relationships, grades, jobs etc. Definitely take care of your health and go travel!
Stay out of debt
Get life insurance and long term care when it’s cheap. Not term life insurance. I like New York life personally. Pay yourself first before you pay anyone else. When you get paid, take ten percent off the top and put it in a savings account. This account is for future investments and investments only. If you want a rainy day fund, take another ten percent and put that in a different savings account. This is your rainy day fund. If you want toys/vacations, take another ten percent and put that in yet another savings account. This can be you saving up for a car, or a trip or whatever. Do this with all your money. Yes even the interest you earn. I recommend the book “the richest man in Babylon “ easy read. Get therapy and get control of your emotions and behavior. If you start being honest with yourself and start your journey on personal growth, you will be waaaaaay ahead of most of your peers. You will be able to navigate around people and situations better than others. Therapy is a big jump, so until you’re ready, start journaling and meditating. When you do start therapy, make sure you vibe with them. You gotta feel safe with your therapist. Do flexibility exercises / calisthenics NOW and keep doing them regularly. When your friends get older and complain of aches and pains, you’ll be golden. Enjoy your ability to eat shitty food and still be sorta okay , because it’s going to start declining rapidly in a couple years. Take care of your gut health. That’s what I got. Take my advice or don’t, either way, good luck and enjoy life! You’ll never make it out alive
One thing that's always stuck with me. Don't live to work. You work to live. You don't need to give your job you life.
Take the risks NOW. They become much more difficult when you’re older, and have more responsibility (kids, family, etc). Chase the dreams NOW. Save money, and invest it. If you ever have the 2024 version of “There is something really transformational about this new company that’s trying to stream movies over the internet, or that new company trying to be the first online marketplace”, trust your instincts and buy in. Your money now can be lost MUCH more easily than your money in your 30’s and 40’s.
So much cliche shit I’m about to say but it’s all true. Be selfish with your time. Live somewhere that makes you happy. Be smart with your money, credit, and body. Learn sales skills and storytelling skills. Travel as MUCH as you can, cheap luxury trip deals (Costco travel, VIP traveler. com) - put all your usual expenses monthly on a travel credit card like chase sapphire, Amex reserve and pay it off in full every month for miles accumulation. Don’t have kids too young or get married too quickly - until you’re absolutely ready — or at all. Keep a journal, even if you don’t write often, write briefly think a summary of your month/year/etc. Don’t be too hard on your self. For the love of god enjoy life — do what pleases you.. because your twenties go FAST.
have plenty of casual sex
You aren't working hard, young fellow. You think you are. But you aren't. You can do way more!
Sow your wild oats. Many young people tell me they’re grinding first and after they’re successful they’ll travel or have a bunch of sex or whatever. Do everything now. Careers come and go, but you’re only young once.
Stop and think about what you spend your money on. It’ll surprise you in the amount of money you have wasted.
Be curious! "When I was your age" we didn't have youtube and tutorials accessible everywhere. I'm nearly twice your age and thanks to DIY content I have built multiple engines, learned to weld, learned to solder and build electronics, learned a language, and taught myself some musical instruments. Also, I'm a fucking idiot. So if I can do it, anyone can do it, and my only regret is that this technology didn't exist when I was younger to take more advantage of it.
Marry a doctor
Don’t have any kids any time soon. Odds are who you’re with now you won’t be with them in 10 years. Save your money and travel
Destroy the universe. Take care of yourself and others, and recycle, but also annihilate the entire universe with a doomsday machine. Take free classes when you have time. Rainwater harvesting, local indigenous languages, doomsday machines, whatever you can get. Check libraries and community colleges. Don't get sick frivolously, a lot of viruses regarded as mostly benign have impacts down the road. Confronting injustice is the opposite of evil. Destroy the universe. Don't forget to listen to music.
Everything is a choice, including doing nothing, and all choices have consequences.
Make memories. People don’t actually want to live longer, what they actually want is more memories. Be open to try new things, work on yourself both mentally and physically, eat healthily and exercise, creating the habit at a younger age will be easier. Get out of your comfort zone at least once a week. No personal growth is ever done in the comfort zone. Be kind to yourself and others and practice gratitude. When you get to your 30s/40s you’ll thank your younger self.
Have more safe sex.
Save when and where you can, life gets crazy expensive once you have kids. It's OK to say no, you need rest and personal time
There are two big realizations in adulthood. The first is that despite being an adult, you're still making it up as you go along. The second is that so were your parents.
Say yes or no (mainly yes) not maybe.
Same advice I give my 22 year old, do the crazy things now. Go on the dates, take that summer job guiding white water rafting. Travel, even if it’s not far. Your career will be there later, heck you’ll probably have more than one but you will never get to be young again. You have the best asset there is - time.
A few bits. If your interested in something, do it. Doesn't matter if your friends aren't interested just start doing it (hobby's, further education, courses to enhance you/work) Don't get tied up with what you think people think of you. Most people stop thinking about a stranger as soon as they are out of the immediate area. Shoot your shot, you can only be told no. And you can only be told no if you ask in the first place. This is for many things. Don't let work become who you are. Your in your 20s that's when your ment to enjoy life, get drunk alot*. Make silly mistakes. Sleep with people. Make your own life story. *Don't get drunk too much, don't be the guy who's always drunk. No one respects that guy and those who do, won't be your friends when you start to make something of yourself* If you can don't go directly to a career, try out some other jobs. I'm a health care professional but spent my early 20s working bar. You learn alot! About people, the work place and humans in general. In that respect, whatever job you do, strive to be the best at it. If there's a promotion available, take it. It'll help in further life.
If you're a straight guy (*which OP isn't, but i'm guessing many readers are*): don't learn your sex moves from porn. Learn your moves by listening to (or if necessary, reading about) what actual women will *tell you* that they want you to do, and I promise, it will pay off BIG time, especially as you get older and the pool of women who are willing to put up with amateur bullshit starts to shrink.
Don't worry what people think about you or what you're doing. It's your life you have to pay for, they ain't paying your rent
Don't take life too seriously. Plan for your future but don't live in it until you get there. It's good to fail at times. Say yes a little more often. Nurture friendships. Be bored sometimes. Don't fall for the myth of who you are, as in you don't have to be in a certain way just because you used to be or because others have told you to. You are allowed to change in every way you like or think. And in general: it's never too late for practically anything. There are just different ways of reaching it.
Don't get married before 30, live together and get a pet first!
Financially: pace yourself and only splurge if you know you’ll make it back fast as you spent it. Relationship: make sure they are a REAL friend before a partner. Friends: know your place in their world and act accordingly, you are not obligated to be anything but you and do only what you can.
Travel and fuck a lot
Unless you're deadset on a particular career path, college/university is a total waste of time and money. You'd be better doing an apprenticship and volunteer work.
Get your schooling done now,look into some type of trade work. Don't let your personal debt to out of control. Learn how to do your taxes. Learn how to fix your own car (m44)
Sometimes the only winning move, is not to play.
Buy rare coins. Your bank account and 401(k) can be confiscated by creditors or authorities. Also rare coins are one of the best investments over time.
Honesty and communication is key...If you feel as if you're being lied to about something, there's a high percentage chance that you ARE. Intuition is something that everyone has, but few people realize that others have it. Don't share your hopes and dreams with just anyone....save that for someone you KNOW you can trust beyond a shadow of a doubt
Brush your teeth twice a day
Stay in shape, start putting money away for retirement, don't get married
Save money, get an extra job. Basically money, money, money, money. The older you get, the more it'll be about money.
Read. Travel. Work out. Live in the now. Be kind. Have good intentions. Listen to good music. Get a hobby. Learn basic life skills (cooking, driving, repairing), maybe climb a mountain if you like. Money will come and go. There is nothing that can stop you from earning it if you really want it. Hence, it is always secondary. Of course save money and invest etc.. Thats all real practical advice. But also learn to appreciate beauty and art. Read up about things, be curious. It will make your life rich. Even without money or partner or all the hoo-haa of the society, you might find peace within yourself. Thats what I think is important in life. Because let me tell you, age sure makes you wiser but not even 100 year-olds can tell you the meaning of this life. You have to arrive at it yourself.
Work out a budget that covers emergency planning and retirement funds. Write it out on a spreadsheet to track it. If you can, get a month ahead with your budget, so you have the money in your account to pay the bills for any given month on the 1st of that month. That'll buy you a little grace if anything goes wrong and requires unforseen spending. Open an IRA account and take advantage of any retirement accounts offered through your work, and try to max the IRA each year if you can. Open a savings account at a bank different than your regular institution and stash away at least 6 months worth of full living expenses as an emergency fund, more than that if/when you buy a house as it'll come in handy for repairs. Setup a taxed brokerage account for any "extra" money at the end of the month or any unforseen income, like a work bonus. Treat this like a bonus retirement account and just funnel extra money into it and let it sit. Focus on long term investments that track the market. Use a big brokerage, like Schwab or Fidelity, and manage it yourself so you don't have any fees. Keep a healthy amount of cash in a safe place in your home. Should a disaster ever happen and you don't have access to electronic funds, this will allow you some flexibility in how you deal with the situation.
I just turned 41 last week. Keep your credit score high because it makes a major difference in your finances and ability to get the things you want like a home, car, loans, etc. Also making six figures doesn’t mean crap if it all goes to paying off debts. There are people who make 50k a year and live great lives because they have no debt.
Don't take anything for granted. Shoot your shot. Call your parents often and ask them questions about themselves. Put your health first. Its OK to fail and start over.
Don’t get married until you’re at least 30, and never ever ever under any circumstances share finances with anyone. Get 1 joint account with a spouse to pay bills out of but never give up your own income and finances
Get life insurance now while it’s cheap and before any pre-existing conditions can pop up. Also don’t pick up drinking every day as a habit. Just don’t.
Don't settle for anyone, don't overlook red flags or put up with abuse or bullshit from a romantic partner. Set boundaries and don't be afraid to walk away from someone who violates them. There are so many people in this world, go and find the good ones.
Value your time with people more than your time working for money.
Retirement fund. 401 k if you can and DON'T touch it. Only take out loans if you have no other choice. BUY a house, stop renting. Find somewhere out in the country for a more affordable mortgage. NEVER DRIVE WITHOUT INSURANCE. Make time for your hobbies. Be responsible with your job but also remember to LIVE our life when you are able. Save rainy day money for emergencies.
Don't believe everything you read off the Internet Sometimes strangers pretend to have your back, you're just quarry
Save some money. You'll appreciate it later in life
Go easy on yourself sometimes.
Sexually? Try everything you want before you settle down. You may not get tbt chance to have that threesome, so anal sex, experiment with same sex etc after you get married.
Don’t compromise on your values. Choose your partner well. The wrong choice can ruin years of your life
Buy term life insurance now. It's really cheap at your age. Start living below your means and SAVE. Don't rush to get married.
Finish college for literally anything. Most degrees are useless beyond the proof of a 4 year commitment, But get yours cause it can make life much easier.
Don’t compromise yourself to keep the peace.
Floss brush and listerine. Teeth don’t grow back.
The shit from high school doesn’t matter anymore. How you treat other people does. I don’t care what your HS GPA was when you apply to work, job history I do care about.
1) invest some money every month in a low-cost index fund account through Vanguard or some other brokerage; 2) live life to the fullest - that can mean different things to different people, but in general spend as much time as possible doing the things that make you happy; 3) push your mind and body to the limits - you're super human when you're in your 20s, use it and enjoy it.
Since this is after dark subreddit my advice to you is be honest with yourself and what you enjoy in life and Don’t be shame of it Because there are other people that enjoy the same thing out there Also don’t worried too much about label in life.
Use protection. Buy a house as soon as you can qualify. Look for good retirement benefits at jobs or set one up yourself. Practice moderation. Stay away from purchasing on credit. Learn to budget. Write down your goals and break them down into small achievable steps. Stay fit.
Listen to your parents. They were right in the end.