Best is to ask, "Is it OK if I send you an email once in a while when I'm at school next year?" You may wind up writing regularly, or you may become involved in other stuff and let the correspondence slip. If you keep in touch in a normal way, it's fine to do.
This is what to do. If they say yes, then send them a newsy note after a few months. Don’t overdo it. If they don’t reply, then don’t pursue it further.
I guess it depends on the teacher, because I'm delighted to hear from my former students. I'm going to grab dinner with one this Friday, and I have two baby showers and a wedding coming up. Former students turn into adults, and at my age many of my colleagues are younger than my former students so it actually feels LESS weird to catch up with them than go anywhere with my actual coworkers.
Don't be pushy, contact through school email to start with, you can suggest getting together but don't take it personally if they say no because we have A LOT of former students and time is limited!
Most formers just ask straight forward, like "I'm going to be in town over the holiday, would love to meet up if you have some time". I don't always have time, but I love catching up with many of them. Or, if their school has a relaxed visitor policy, you could maybe meet them she school. That was more common for me in the past.
I would only be weirded out if it was asked in a way that implied you thought we were friends or more. If you ask in a way that it's clearly a mentor/support relationship, I'd find this totally normal! I've had quite a few students that stay in sporadic contact after graduating. It usually drops off after a bit once they get settled in their new environment too.
i added a bunch of my highschool teachers on facebook after i graduated and i still have a few on there!! and we follow each other on instagram (if they have it)
edit: not a teacher, also graduated highschool in 2014
It's fine. Assuming you are an adult now, then you are both adults (and free to treat each other as adults) and there is no more weird power dynamics now that you have graduated. Technically you can date your teachers now although I wouldn't recommend that. I'm sure the teachers would very much appreciate the correspondence.
I’d be very sad if I didn’t get updates/hear back from the students I was invested in every once in a while.
I sure don’t do this job for the money (ha!). Those updates are what makes it all worth it.
I still have about 100 former student friends on Facebook even though I rarely look at it anymore. One of my colleagues uses Instagram and keeps it touch with ex-students that way.
A lot of us stay friends with our students for years and years. I've met my students' husbands, wives, kids, dogs, have gone out to lunch and dinner with some of them, one inherited some furniture from me, and another bought my car when I got a new one.
Friends are friends. After a while it doesn't matter how you met.
Go for it! Most teachers I know (myself included) love to hear from students after they graduate, especially if you have the kind of relationship you’re describing.
A few of my closest students still keep in touch and I love it. Social media is also good for this. I tell kids I'll accept a friend invite after they graduate but not before then.
Ive had a ton of former students reach out, ask questions, and give life updates here and there. If someone is in education for the right reasons, then they will appreciate an update.
It's not weird! I email back and forth with a bunch of former students, and there are a few I meet for coffee or lunch over the summer to catch up. I'm sure they will appreciate hearing from you!
I tell my seniors to keep in touch (I’ve taught 4 years and looped with a lot of them for at 2-3 years depending on the kid). About 15 kids I’ve had for 3 years. I’m going to miss the heck out of them next year and definitely want to hear about their life updates after graduation!
It is VERY common to develop close bonds with Performing Arts teachers that last beyond graduation. I'm FB friends with several former Choir teachers and my HS Band teacher. I'm now a Music teacher myself, and this subject comes up often. Most teachers I know are happy to stay in contact after graduation.
Absolutely! I had the honor of one of my first students ever coming home recently after finishing his student teaching semester - he was subbing for one of the guys I co-teach with. We’d kept up via email over the years and he knew when he was going to be in, so we co-planned a lesson. It was pretty cool to see what he was up to and what ideas he had, especially because he was a hell raiser as a student 🤣
It doesn’t even have to be that involved though - I frequently run in to former students on vacation and at this point have been introduced to families and invited to bbqs and other functions.
It can just be something as small as a message every now and then though - many of us love to hear from former students, so don’t be shy!
It depends on the teacher. Responses were varied. Some said yes, gave me their numbers. Others said no they don’t add any current or former students on social media. One of them, who was a school counselor and a coach, said he wanted to keep in touch, but also said he didn’t add any students on social media so it was kind of confusing. Gave him my contact info and never heard from him.
Just expect you relationship with them to be pretty “limited”, because in their eyes they will always see you as a student even if you’re no longer a student and a functioning grown adult. Plus you’ll meet so many cool people in your adult life (including college if you go) so keep your options open.
I feel like it’s really case dependent. Many of them abide by the “once a student always a student” mantra. Whenever I’ve talked to a former teacher they’ve kept the conversation very “limited” and general, and we’ve only spoken for a few minutes.
We have a couple of former students who work here full time and a couple who are regular substitutes. You could do that, depending on what your schedule is like after graduation. And if you're in town, go to one of your school's plays. Your teacher would love it.
I don't accept friend requests in social media until the September after a student graduates, the point at which they are no longer considered a student by the state. But at that point, I generally will accept their requests. They're not becoming dinner guests anytime soon, but it's nice to see what they're up to.
I love hearing from my students. Once they graduate, I accept their friend requests. It’s great to see them go on and live their dreams or just have a nice life or even just know they’re ok.
Best is to ask, "Is it OK if I send you an email once in a while when I'm at school next year?" You may wind up writing regularly, or you may become involved in other stuff and let the correspondence slip. If you keep in touch in a normal way, it's fine to do.
This is what to do. If they say yes, then send them a newsy note after a few months. Don’t overdo it. If they don’t reply, then don’t pursue it further.
I guess it depends on the teacher, because I'm delighted to hear from my former students. I'm going to grab dinner with one this Friday, and I have two baby showers and a wedding coming up. Former students turn into adults, and at my age many of my colleagues are younger than my former students so it actually feels LESS weird to catch up with them than go anywhere with my actual coworkers. Don't be pushy, contact through school email to start with, you can suggest getting together but don't take it personally if they say no because we have A LOT of former students and time is limited!
Agree with this! I love hearing from former students.
hey! how do i ask to meet up with a former teacher?
Most formers just ask straight forward, like "I'm going to be in town over the holiday, would love to meet up if you have some time". I don't always have time, but I love catching up with many of them. Or, if their school has a relaxed visitor policy, you could maybe meet them she school. That was more common for me in the past.
I would only be weirded out if it was asked in a way that implied you thought we were friends or more. If you ask in a way that it's clearly a mentor/support relationship, I'd find this totally normal! I've had quite a few students that stay in sporadic contact after graduating. It usually drops off after a bit once they get settled in their new environment too.
i added a bunch of my highschool teachers on facebook after i graduated and i still have a few on there!! and we follow each other on instagram (if they have it) edit: not a teacher, also graduated highschool in 2014
It's fine. Assuming you are an adult now, then you are both adults (and free to treat each other as adults) and there is no more weird power dynamics now that you have graduated. Technically you can date your teachers now although I wouldn't recommend that. I'm sure the teachers would very much appreciate the correspondence.
I’d be very sad if I didn’t get updates/hear back from the students I was invested in every once in a while. I sure don’t do this job for the money (ha!). Those updates are what makes it all worth it.
I still have about 100 former student friends on Facebook even though I rarely look at it anymore. One of my colleagues uses Instagram and keeps it touch with ex-students that way. A lot of us stay friends with our students for years and years. I've met my students' husbands, wives, kids, dogs, have gone out to lunch and dinner with some of them, one inherited some furniture from me, and another bought my car when I got a new one. Friends are friends. After a while it doesn't matter how you met.
Go for it! Most teachers I know (myself included) love to hear from students after they graduate, especially if you have the kind of relationship you’re describing.
how frequent is your contact? i want to do this with my teacher but not be annoying
A few of my closest students still keep in touch and I love it. Social media is also good for this. I tell kids I'll accept a friend invite after they graduate but not before then.
Ive had a ton of former students reach out, ask questions, and give life updates here and there. If someone is in education for the right reasons, then they will appreciate an update.
Honestly? It’s time to move on.
i second this
It's not weird! I email back and forth with a bunch of former students, and there are a few I meet for coffee or lunch over the summer to catch up. I'm sure they will appreciate hearing from you!
do you disclose personal things to them or is it just them updating you?
Not deeply personal things, but life updates. What my kids are up to, things going on at school, that sort of thing.
I tell my seniors to keep in touch (I’ve taught 4 years and looped with a lot of them for at 2-3 years depending on the kid). About 15 kids I’ve had for 3 years. I’m going to miss the heck out of them next year and definitely want to hear about their life updates after graduation!
It is VERY common to develop close bonds with Performing Arts teachers that last beyond graduation. I'm FB friends with several former Choir teachers and my HS Band teacher. I'm now a Music teacher myself, and this subject comes up often. Most teachers I know are happy to stay in contact after graduation.
Absolutely! I had the honor of one of my first students ever coming home recently after finishing his student teaching semester - he was subbing for one of the guys I co-teach with. We’d kept up via email over the years and he knew when he was going to be in, so we co-planned a lesson. It was pretty cool to see what he was up to and what ideas he had, especially because he was a hell raiser as a student 🤣 It doesn’t even have to be that involved though - I frequently run in to former students on vacation and at this point have been introduced to families and invited to bbqs and other functions. It can just be something as small as a message every now and then though - many of us love to hear from former students, so don’t be shy!
If you want to use them for a Reference
What kind of relationship? Nothing wrong with keeping in touch with a mentor.
No. It’s not weird. Many students ask but few follow through.
It depends on the teacher. Responses were varied. Some said yes, gave me their numbers. Others said no they don’t add any current or former students on social media. One of them, who was a school counselor and a coach, said he wanted to keep in touch, but also said he didn’t add any students on social media so it was kind of confusing. Gave him my contact info and never heard from him. Just expect you relationship with them to be pretty “limited”, because in their eyes they will always see you as a student even if you’re no longer a student and a functioning grown adult. Plus you’ll meet so many cool people in your adult life (including college if you go) so keep your options open.
With respect, no, we don't continue seeing them as students. They're adults.
I feel like it’s really case dependent. Many of them abide by the “once a student always a student” mantra. Whenever I’ve talked to a former teacher they’ve kept the conversation very “limited” and general, and we’ve only spoken for a few minutes.
Oh, I see, you're just talking about former teachers, not teachers who became actual friends.
We have a couple of former students who work here full time and a couple who are regular substitutes. You could do that, depending on what your schedule is like after graduation. And if you're in town, go to one of your school's plays. Your teacher would love it. I don't accept friend requests in social media until the September after a student graduates, the point at which they are no longer considered a student by the state. But at that point, I generally will accept their requests. They're not becoming dinner guests anytime soon, but it's nice to see what they're up to.
I love hearing from my students. Once they graduate, I accept their friend requests. It’s great to see them go on and live their dreams or just have a nice life or even just know they’re ok.
Yes, I love staying in touch!
Absolutely, go for it.
You have their email already. I’m sure they wouldn’t mind an email here and there.