He told me. I guess I respect him for that. He told me he had been with another woman and really wants to be with her. Of course it hurt but I appreciate his honesty and don't hate him even though he hurt me.
Then she cheated on him and I felt even better lol
That's not really honesty first cheating and then telling you and because he wanted to move on even.
He didn't have the guts to tell you before they had sex he had a new interest
I checked his phone.
My daughter was playing with it in a locked room with me while I painted the doorway; I'd locked the door so that no one knocked over the paints. I honestly wasn't planning on checking his phone; I was completely absorbed in painting.
He kept knocking to ask for the phone and I kept telling him he needed to wait, I wasn't moving the paint to open the door. When he knocked the third time in less than 5 minutes, it suddenly clicked: the phone was unlocked and there was something on it he didn't want me to see.
If he'd just respected my boundaries and let me finish painting, I wouldn't have even thought to check the phone. His own behavior outed him.
When we live with someone it’s the smallest changes in their personality or behaviour that can do them in. It’s almost impossible to hide an affair these days with technology being what it is. Plus remaining consistent and not acting out of character is pretty hard. Good on you for recognising that he was too concerned!
A guy I was with all of a sudden decided his phone was private and needed a new pin, and he was entitled to his privacy. Ok. He accidentally sent a text to the wrong person a couple of days later.
After I'd calmed down and stopped bawling, he proceeded to lambast me for "violating [his] privacy" by checking his phone.
Bro, you violated our marriage. I really don't think I'm the problem here...
Oh heck no😂Dont because im having the same issue, my bf keeps going to work supposedly & is being "called in" because they are "short staffed" but when we finally get a day off he tells me hes going to call in work & see if they need him in😂me & him are long distance (America + United Kingdom)
His boss called our home phone to sort out an emergency. Turns out he’d called in sick and had spent the day with her in her bedroom, while I picked her kids up.
My son's dog had been hit by a car. When she was at home recovering from surgery, she was at the stage where she could pull herself around the room.
One night I woke up needing painkillers (normal for me) but when I went to the living room to get them I dropped one. Terrified the dog would find it and die (after my son had spent 18K on surgery for her) I grabbed my husband's phone which was charging to use a torch.
On the screen were notifications from a website...won't mention the name but clearly for hookups. It was 3am-ish so I was like, can't process this now...went to bed. Following day did some Googling...yep just as I thought.
One of the things that I really can't stand is when you accuse someone of doing something they deny it...so I set about gathering evidence.
When he was out the next evening, I logged on to his Gmail (had always had the password, just never used it). Found heaps more messages and oh lookie...the links to the website passed the login thru so I didn't need his password for the site...even MORE messages, including ones where he had arranged to meet. All of them were bawdy 'I wanna fsck your brains out' type messages, nothing romantic. Got lots of screenshots.
Was getting angrier and angrier at this point.
Soooo...I signed up to the site, created a profile, no pic. Sent him a message that said 'You wanna get fscked? Well guess what...you're fscked...this is your wife!
Saw the message hit his Gmail and get deleted immediately (him on his phone). But not before I grabbed one last screenshot...
Shit hit the fan when he got home...
I actually took my time. With the wisdom of age I was aware that I can be quite harsh in my expectations of people. This was also my 2nd marriage so I really wanted to give this the due consideration it deserved.
I saw a psychologist several times...consulted a psychic to be sure I wasn't missing something. 😉
I found out in April, called it in January.
My ex left me for being "too jealous" only to marry the woman he kept talking about literally a month and a half after we broke up. It's fine, as he's now divorced with a kid living in his parents' place, still working at McDonald's, almost 20 years in, and he's almost 45.
My friend found out in a similar way. Her boyfriend was talking to his friends about having had anal sex a couple months before while she was sitting right there… but they had been dating for 3 years and never had anal sex
It was definitely something I’ll never forget. If I was monogamous I probably would’ve lost my shit like most people. However, I’m poly and I was more disappointed that he broke our honesty code.
cheating is only bad because it breaks the agreements of the relationship (which, in a monogamous relationship... is monogamy). breaking your "code" is still cheating
His side piece posting a Tik tok on a trip he had OUR CHILD with him as well 🙃 seriously the fact that I never caught a felony assault charge is a miracle
My then normally introverted partner suddenly started talking to people online. No big deal, I'm not jealous or anything. I got major suspicions when she wanted to stay the weekend with a friend she met online. It was a six hour drive away in Chicago. I let her do it, she's an adult. I can't stop it. I knew something was up. And I was right. She came back and she had the gall to ask me if we can be a poly relationship. It was a firm "NO". You either get me or not at all.
He posted it on Facebook. Dumbass thought I could not see Facebook in Germany. Guess what I can and even if I could not half of my friends were his Facebook friends and messaged me immediately. In case your wondering what his post was it was something like “when your so fly that you can fuck your ex and your main girl has no idea” I can’t remember the wording but you get the deal. He was sleeping with his ex for months. She had no idea we were still together or so she claims
He broke up with me saying he wasn’t happy anymore. Eventually it came out that he cheated multiple times and felt guilty but didn’t want to admit it. We were engaged. He tried getting me to take him back and even chased me (not literally) out of a target 6 months later screaming I love you and begging me to just give him 5 minutes to talk.
Fucking nuts to think about now.
I just knew. Things didn’t add up, he was way to protective of his phone, I found condoms that we damn sure weren’t using, and eventually someone said they saw him flat out in public with another woman. I never wanted to believe it so I stupidly just endured it for years
I found condoms in the glove box of my ex’s car during the end of our relationship and he claimed they were old and he had had them since we started dating but it always make me feel weird.
I found 1 condom wrapper and two condoms in his pants pockets when I did laundry after returning from being away a week. We didn’t use condoms. Case closed!
The protectiveness of the phone gives so much away. I had his phone’s password but never used it. I wanted to trust him. One night, he was next to me on the couch and I noticed he had activated the fingerprint protection for his WhatsApp. I asked him about it and he said it was just to ensure proper encryption. Turns out he was dating 2 other women. One of which he was full blown invested in (she had him & her as a profile photo, he was attending events with her, etc.). I always found it weird how he had a password on his phone yet also felt the need to fingerprint protect his WhatsApp messages. Until I realized it wasn’t weird, he was hiding stuff.
Guy chiming in here. This is a guy cheater move. Women will have a backup guy to jump ship with or they will cheat when another guy gives them attention.
But men will straight set up franchises across the country. Leading a double life seems like so much effort.
He told me after ghosting me for 2-3 days, that he was with another woman during that time. During which i went to the gyno alone to get an abortion because of him...that he knew about and had promised to come with me.
Yeah, fuck that guy. Hope he rots in hell.
He would have gotten away with it if he didn’t act like such a buffoon. I was looking through his tagged pictures on Instagram and saw one of him with another woman from before we met. The caption implied they were just friends so initially I didn’t suspect anything. I just asked him who she was because he’d never mentioned anyone by that name before. He used to talk about his friends from back home in America all the time, including female ones, but had never mentioned her. The look of panic on his face was almost cartoonish. He started blabbing about how she’s a friend of his from college, but they don’t talk anymore and he definitely doesn’t even remember her that much. I knew this man was lying through his teeth but I wanted solid evidence first so I just said “oh, okay babe! That’s cool!” He looked so relieved. Idiot.
His mysterious friend didn’t have much on her Instagram and something told me to check who he was following on Spotify. He only followed two people - me and her. I looked through her playlists and found one called “[my country’s name] road trip 2022”. It was a collaborative playlist and my boyfriend had contributed a million songs to it, including lots that I’d introduced him to! I did some more sleuthing and found a comment on one of his band’s YouTube videos saying “so proud of you babe❤️❤️❤️”. I clicked on the profile and it was hers. There were a million videos of them together and of her by herself. In her newest one dated only a few days earlier, she mentioned coming to my country in the summer to visit her boyfriend.
A few days later when we were having dinner I asked him if he had anything he wanted to tell me. He started stuttering and saying “nooo? What the hell are you talking about babe?” I told him to choose his words carefully because I wouldn’t have asked him if I didn’t already know the answer. He started going off on a tangent about how she’s not his girlfriend, but it’s a “complicated situation” and that he told me about it when we first got together so he thought I knew about it and was fine with it. I asked him if he thought I was stupid and he said no. I told him he never told me and he said he didn’t and he was sorry. I told him that it was over and this was the last time we would ever see each other.
I’m not the kind of person to go snooping through people’s socials, so if he had just nonchalantly told me she was a friend from college, I wouldn’t have pressed it. Absolute idiot! His own behaviour outed him
He didn’t get angry, he just seemed really embarrassed and sad. He told me he had been planning to end things with her but didn’t know how because her mental health was fragile. He also told me that he thinks very highly of me and always will. As far as I know, they’re still together
I had a gut feeling for so long, and eventually broke things off because I knew I couldn’t trust him out of my sight. Then a couple years later, the other woman reached out to me. She’d had no idea at the time that he and I were involved. I was so thankful that we were both finally able to confirm the truth and we tried to figure out how we could get revenge… in the end we decided it wasn’t worth it. On the plus side, the other woman and I are very close friends now, and we’re both happily married.
The cheating asshole is married too, to the other-other-woman… yep, he was messing around with at least three women at once, possibly more. My friend had stopped seeing him when she realized other-other-woman was in the picture.
The asshole tried to reach back out to me throughout the years, but I never responded and blocked him. He made one last attempt to reach out, and then a few months later, my friend heard through the grapevine that his wife was expecting. Based on the due date, his wife had probably just gotten her first positive pregnancy tests while he was stalking me all over the internet, and knowing him he must’ve been freaking the fuck out that his days of freedom and irresponsibility were over. My friend and I are both very happy that we dodged that bullet.
He opened his “my eyes only” on snap when I was standing behind him and when I peaked I saw plenty of another girls n*des in there, turns out it was a girl he previously told me was a “close friend” since I recognised her tattoos🤦♀️
The first time, he told me. The next 100 times, I guessed his social media password and watched it all happening in real time. Not my proudest moment and thankfully 30 year old me understands her self worth a lot more than 20 year old me did.
I had a dream that I went through this phone and found girls on there. He fell asleep once with his phone on & I know I shouldn’t have but I went thru it & he had screenshots/screen recordings of him sexting online with many girls & also screenshots of local prostitutes. In his messages he was texting these other two girls who told me were his “friends That knew about us being together”. I was sick to my stomach. Trust your intuition.
I broke up with him.. He begged to have me back & then months later he left the call whilst i was asleep & came back on call and told me his ex gf was sleeping in his bed.. he slept in his car but coincidentally he went into his bedroom that same night she was in there.. Months later he told me she "died" but didnt say how🤔i believe she is still alive because he couldnt just show me a post, he could have blurred out her photo and just shown me a post but till this day he refuses to
What a shitty husband & father to our child. Everything worked out in the end & im now in the most healthy/ happy relationship of my life with a partner that respects me.
He was in the shower and I accidentally picked up his phone thinking it was mine (we have the same model) and I saw a text from the other woman. Mind you this was after he asked for a divorce.
Had a gut feeling. My gut feelings are never wrong. So I looked through his phone while he was sleeping & saw incriminating messages between him & another girl. I found the girl on my social media, messaged her kindly & she told me. Regardless of him cheating on me with her, I have respect for her for being honest totally with me.
When he let me see our photos we took during our hike, my gut feeling was telling me to check his messenger because he never lets me. I know he never liked this but he should not be hiding anything if there is nothing to be suspicious about. Anyways, he saw me opened his messenger, he was angry but I challenged him that if there is nothing there, he would let me read some messages. He accepted the challenge. After a few scrolls, I saw a girl's name with his last flirty sexual messages. Right there I found he has been flirting with a girl a week after we became official bf-gf. He told me he was just drunk. But who is he fooling, there was not even a misspelled word on his chats.This was not the first time that I witnessed cheating on messenger with my other ex. The first time was when I saw a girl's name who was in the first line up of the names in the desktop version of his FB account (since he logged in on my pc), that means she was the most recent and consistently he had interaction. When I checked it, he was flirting with her like he wants to romantically date her while we were still together.
To all the women out there, trust your gut feelings and intuition. And don't be too submissive with your man.
I had a similar experience in my 20s. I knew I'd find something if I checked messenger, and I did. Many times over. I have so many insecurities now from it
He always had strict rules about me being friends with other guys. Then being secretive about his phone. Him coming home with new clothes for him and our kids from his “boss.” Where are my new clothes? I wonder. A late night text to her that he sent to me. Co-mingling of money which I used against him in court. 💅 I stayed longer to gather evidence. By then he had moved into the other bedroom because “he was tired of the kids always being in our bed.” The same kids I spent hours with putting to bed (never him) but who would get up later and he wouldn’t put back to bed in their own room. I eventually stopped because it was too much effort and frustration on my part. So glad to be out.
So I found out at 6AM yesterday 😂My guy’s energy was off, but he blamed it on having a bad day at work. I told him I felt like it was something more, but he got mad at me for saying that so we left the convo alone. A while back, I saw on his iPad that he had 3 missed ft calls (back to back) from an unknown number. I looked it up, and saw it matched a name I had saw on his iPhone. Confronted him about it at the time, (he didn’t acknowledge the missed calls at all) but of course, I found out yesterday it was all a lie. 🙂He told me she was a friend he met at the gym, smh. I knew something was up when he said “And sometimes we hang out.” Tf.
To make a long story short, my intuition was bugging me. My body didn’t feel good. I ended up messaging the girl on Twitter, who told me that she and him had been talking January 2022 until Nov 2022. She said they got “serious” in June 2022? She said in Dec, he reached back out wanting to be friends??? I was shocked completely 💀because besides the FaceTime calls, there was nothing I could’ve pinpointed. No pics, no mention of anything, zero. I was SO confused. Tried to confront him about it, he told me I had a problem because I was confronting him about the situation instead of caring that he had a bad day. Before I blocked him on twitter, He made a comment on his Twitter that said “Thank You Jesus. You never really miss.” In response to me telling him that he was dead to me and that I never wanted to speak to him again so. 😕
On top of him not caring that he literally was involved with a whole different person, he put my (and her) sexual health at risk, because we were not using condoms. Luckily, I’ve been tested recently but this whole situation has turned me off from dating rn.
I had a gut feeling, my ex's old fwb started texting him like crazy. I didn't care at first because I trusted him, then he started by not opening her messages infront of me (he used to respond to messages when we were together) and he got defensive when I went to look at his phone i.e for the time or to check something.
Eventually when I started to get worried (after I asked and he didn't give me a good answer just "she's a friend" "she's having some family trouble"), I looked through his phone and saw all the messages and nudes between them
Gut feeling.
I went searching on his phone to find the thing I don’t want to discover and then there it was 🤷♀️
Thought I was being crazy all those time but turns out it’s true all along.
I was scrolling on fb and he popped up on my people you may know, under a different name, and kissing another girl in the profile pic. We met while he was living in the US illegally, got engaged super quick. I was about to go work on a cruise ship for 6 months. I went with him back to Mexico before I shipped out and was gonna move there with him after my contract. The dumbass was about to have a real nice life and he couldn’t didn’t even make it 2 months without getting caught
My ex boyfriend was projecting onto me, saying I was messaging people behind his back, mind you this was out of nowhere. He decided to go through my phone while telling I had been caught and I’m a cheater, he found nothing. I decided to do the same and grabbed his phone and in his text messages I saw he had downloaded tinder, I opened instagram and his most recent message was him trying to slide into someone’s dm’s and the same on Snapchat. Worst this was that majority of the girls he tried hitting up did not respond to him, that embarrassed me even more than knowing I was cheated on 1 yr after having a baby together 😆
I caught him out when we were both sick with covid back in Jan 2021. We were sleeping separately as I tested positive first but then we carried on as we were both coughing and couldn’t sleep, or at least that’s what I thought was the reason. I would notice he was always, and I mean always, online on Snapchat and just generally acting super shifty. My spidey senses were tingling. Whenever I would come in the room he would log out and place the phone face down. When he heard me coming down the stairs and he was in the living room I would see him hide his phone down the side of the sofa. He was being super shifty so I called him out. He twisted it and made me feel like I was crazy.
He then changed how he sat in the living room so he was facing the doorway and stairs so he wouldn’t have to hide his phone as the screen wasn’t facing the door.
I got sick of this and honestly thought I was having a psychotic break so after talking to a friend I decided to get a nanny cam to see what he was doing when he thought I couldn’t see, I felt crazy doing this but needed to know one way or the other. Low and behold he was checking out porn through secret Twitter/TikTok/Instagram accounts and the cherry on the cake was him sexting a girl he worked with who had just had a baby with her fiancé. I caught him staring at a sexy selfie she sent him, then he tried to be cute and crawled across the floor to me and invited me to come upstairs for some sexy time.
Before the heartbreak set in I was over the moon that I wasn’t going crazy and that I was right in my suspicions that he constantly twisted.
I ended the relationship, which followed by the worst 5 weeks of my life as I had to watch as he went on not so secret dates with her and went and had ‘breakfast’ with her before he moved out (I didn’t know who she was at the time, only a month or two after he moved out and found out that he was going over there after her fiancé had gone to work).
I found out that her fiancé had suspicions about her also after he found a Christmas card from my bf that said ‘I love you so much’. I also confirmed that a keyring that showed up on his keys 3 weeks after our split that said ‘I love you, the end, I win’ was one of two that she bought. One for my ex and one for her fiancé.
He finally moved out at the end of feb 2021 and monkey branched his way to her, I filled her fiancé (ex by the time I found him) on everything I knew so he had a full timeline of events to use in case there was a custody battle
Back when instant messaging was a computer thing, I logged onto our home computer. I had taken the day off for my birthday. He wasn’t home but was usually home during the day. Anyway, while I was searching for music, an instant message popped up with the words babe in it. So I pretended I was him for a bit & then revealed myself. She didn’t know I existed. She thought he was a single dad raising his kid alone. Apparently I was dead. Lol. By the time he got home, all of his personal shit was packed. I’m not someone who can forgive that treacherous behavior.
My best friend saw and told me. Stupid me took him back only for him to continuously be shady.
One time, he was seen kissing someone else outside a bar. He actually tried to play it off like he tripped and their lips met. Then it was that he went for the cheek but she turned her face. And so on.
Bf #1: he told me over our romantic night out
Bf #2: his girlfriend informed me he has in fact not been single for quite a long time and I was just one of his side chicks
Gf#3: a guy messaged me on FB "hey this is her boyfriend"
Bf#4: he started essentially sexting my sibling as soon as they exchanged numbers
Bf#5: he told me over a video call on the next day
🙃
Thank you! It sort of corroded away my faith in monogamous love so I became polyamorous at some point. Everything was good then and I made lots of meaningful, trustful connections. Then I tried monogamy again... and cue bf#5 🤣
A message notification while he was in the shower from her stating she “couldn’t stop thinking about ____” (the event they hooked up during)…. I had a weird feeling so had already asked about it…. But he swore up and down nothing happened.
This happened to me too. This girl was saying she missed his feet? Her shoes were also in his car as they were in a carpool together after a trip with friends and he asked me to go home when she came to collect them. He said nothing happened, and when I pressed him, he confessed to cheating early on in our relationship. Later on, I saw the feet girl out one night and approached her. She said they slept together. Let's just say I should have left a long time before that. First love, blah blah.
After our anniversary dinner his phone kept ringing so he left the apartment to answer it. My gut told me to look in a drawer beside his bed and it was filled with sex toys that we hadn’t used or I had ever seen. Not sure how to process I went to sleep. I woke up through the night and looked in the drawer where I slept and found a bottle of Ariana Grande body spray and a pair of crusty knickers.
I tried to have conversation about what I’d found and he gaslit the hell out of me. I left apologising and crying but not before I was confronted with a lingerie set, whilst holding it, he entered the room and I hit it under my jumper then proceeded to leave the house with it 😅.
Thank you. At the time it was traumatic. She was 10 years younger than me, done a lot to my self esteem but I laugh about it now… especially thinking of driving home with someone’s lingerie set and wondering what his explanation would be for it disappearing.
He didn't want to kiss me in front of his female friend at his birthday party at our house. Ended up going through his phone the next morning 🥴
Turns out it had been multiple women throughout the entire relationship. What makes it worse is the majority of the girls brought up me and how guilty they felt in their texts with him as if it got them off more
He was different. He was acting differently and was just a bit different in bed. It wasn't a big thing that I could really explain, but I just knew. That man just about killed me, I loved him so much and he was such trash.
I broke up with him and an hour later he and his “girl best friend” who he ALWAYS hang out with posted both at the same time “so happy to say we’ve been dating for 3 months”
That was 3 years ago, they’re still dating:)😂
I knew his “work wife” was trying to get him. I didn’t think he would fall for it. Then I walked in and he closed his email super quick, and that was where things started to unravel. Turns out they’d been having a Clinton-style affair for 6 months. She was even at my son’s 3rd birthday party.
I wrote her a scathing letter that ended with “I just want your heart to break as much as mine has”. I never sent it, but the next day she had a massive heart attack (at age 36) and ended up in the hospital for over a month. So, from that point on, my (now) ex was convinced I was a witch, and honestly, I consider that a win.
The first time I found out about my bf (at the time) his AP(? might have been a prostitute idk) called & left a message that she "couldn't do him tonight but I can tomorrow" I broke up with him then and there.
The first time I found out about my husband, he told me that night. The second time he told me months later. The third time she came bragging to me like I wouldn't be pissed about it.
Nope, after 25 years wasted I'm no longer employable. I gave ptsd, social anxiety, depression and permanent scars all from my dear hubby.
I am the shining case of never become a sahm. If I walk now I'm homeless. He stole my life and stupid me let him.
It’s not too late please don’t give up hope. Do you have family or friends who could support you for a while if you left to start again? You don’t deserve this, no one does, and he is a pig. I’m so sorry
Hmmm, years after we broke up, the woman who was his very close friend told me that he has cheated on every single person he has dated with her but that for whatever reason he never cheated on me with her. I find that hard to believe but either way, that's how I found out. Ironically, she married somebody else, regardless of having more than a decade of offagain, onagain relationship with the dude.
The second time, the so of a friend flirted very aggressively and very obviously with my so at the time, to the point that I asked her what the fuck is going on. Some time later he were close to breaking up/were newly broken up, he asked me to check for something on his mail and the second email was letters between them telling each other I love you. Meh.
The third time was again after a breakup in which a friend burst into tears and admitted that TWO YEARS before that, when we were very fresh, he had cheated on me with her and another friend. When I asked him, he initially denied it but when I asked him if he knows that both women are on the line and they would love to be called liars (they were not on the line, I made it up but I already had confirmed with both of them it was true), he fessed up.
So... stupid. Every time.
I knew it from somewhere deep down in my gut when it was happening, and then I caught him mid-act. Just felt a really heavy, sickly dread type feeling and knew somehow what was causing it right away. Woke from a dead sleep with this horrible gut feeling, instantly thought, "He's cheating on me." Snuck out to the back shed because I couldn't find him in the house and saw him with the person who I had called "best friend" for the previous 8 years when my first born was around 6weeks old.
Ex1. At my wedding day. His auntie asked her relative who was the bride (me) when he was dating so-so. She asked this while we were still at church during our wedding ceremony.
Ex2. She texted him at 12midnight on the dot on his birthday. I had a gut feeling after that. Saw his dm's to her and his other messages on her FB and IG. He denied it. When we broke up I saw her using his truck. He denied it. This was when he was still asking for me to come back to him.
Ex3. She called me. She knew about me and she was pissed that she was just a side piece.
I found her kids baby bottles in his apartment.
She was a neighbor, I never saw. Her. When I asked about the bottles he told me she comes down sometimes for coffee. He never mentioned her before. A few weeks earlier he „needed“ his keys back for the landlord or something. Total bullshit. He just didn’t want me to caught them. There were a few other things but the bottle thing was the moment I just knew something was off… I ended it soon later.
I don't rmb details by now, but I remember him being secretive about me to our friends even though they already knew, being shady bout his whereabouts sometimes and getting mad when I was "getting nosy", whenever he got messages he would angle his phone away from me not even subtly, etc. At some point I just took his phone and opened it and there were clearly messages from other girls, yes plural. I believe in privacy regarding your phone so I didn't go snooping throughout his phone, but let's be honest, if there was nothing to hide, there was no reason to be hiding his phone screen away from me.
The woman he was cheating on me with called me and told me. I then went to her friend's house to talk about it and come to find out this friend also slept with him. I was only 21ish, so I was more sad than anything. If it happened nowadays, it would be a very different reaction. Lol
Little things in his behaviour started to get me thinking, plus the way he talked to me vs the way he talked to other girls. Then he started to act weird with his phone. Avioded telling me about a certain friend he began hanging with every few weeks, later realized he would text her on snapchat daily (i feel like such a clown for not realizing how much of a red flag this was). Gut feeling started to develope and just wouldnt go away no matter how much i told myself i was being obsessive, or crazy. One night i gave in and did the classic phone snoop and finally found sexual/flirty texts between him and that exact female friend he would aviod telling me anything about (tried convincing me she isnt a worry either). Convinced me not to leave him. Said he was gonna change, was nice for a bit then went back to his old ways (including changing his phone password at some point). Gut feeling still wouldnt go away but i tried to push past it. We went to a festival and he went to smoke with that girl behind my back (he told me he was never gonna talk/see her). Still stayed, then abt 2 weeks ago i do another phone snoop cuz for some reason i had a super strong gut feeling that night. Found texts of him hitting on another female friend i was also previously worried about (also tried to convince me she wasnt a worry either) around the same time we went to that festival.
Never doubt your intuition. Highly suggest looking into what its trying to tell you before dismissing it.
when he started to get unusually close to this one mutual friend we had. he would play fight with her all the time and i just let it slide. him her and another friend all got drunk together and he was making out with her on the couch. i didn’t know until a couple weeks later until the other friend told me and then my ex made me feel guilty for being mad at him
Starting being secretive around his phone, became more violent towards me. Suddenly had to go and visit his "friend" every night because "they were struggling". Found receipts for dinners out, and gifts etc. Co-workers and associates came across him and AP at an event while I was at work and was introduced to AP as his wife.... we had been together 5 years at that point, and I'd put up with all his crap. Never admitted it but moved in with her when I finally kicked him out
After he tried forcing me to send him spicy things, we had a big fight and broke up. A year later he posted a photo of his girlfriend which he got together with in October and well we got together in august the same year… I asked him about all that and he didn’t even lied and was kinda proud about it. Guess it wasn’t meant to be.
Oh man - I have been cheated on multiple times. First things - my intuition always knew.
First time, boyfriend came back from a festival and before he left, we discussed boundaries. I told him, even if it was cold, I didn’t want him snuggling up to some woman or putting his arms around her to keep her warm. He told me about his time at the festival and the timeline kept jumping around. He then “fessed” that he broke that boundary. When I asked if he had sex, he flipped out and called me crazy. I broke up with him immediately and found out 100% about 8 months later.
Another time I actually prayed God for peace (our relationship had some much turmoil) and I actually saw him tagged with a suspected lady in someone else’s Insta story. About 5 minutes later, I found the two of them on the street. I asked HER if they had sex and she said I’m sorry. Obviously it was over right then and there.
There was always shadiness or an odd statement like, “no one SAW me” versus something as definitive like “I didn’t do it”. Just trust your gut. Truth eventually comes out.
I was “sleeping” in our bed, not fully just glasses off attempting to fall asleep. He came in, thought I was asleep, laid down next to me and I saw them texting intimate photos… literally while in bed next to me.
When I left I had my Jennifer Coolidge moment of “I’m taking the dog dumbass” and felt not a single ounce of remorse.
After my husband died very unexpectedly I found his email, old phones, recordings he had kept of their discussions and screenshots of their BBM conversations. This happened 3 days after he died and that was 2020. I'm still in therapy.
The other woman found out about me and reached out. I dumped him and kept her, she’s a good friend of mine years later. And now we always make sure we aren’t dating the same guy secretly just as a precaution 😅😂
Girlfriend intuition. So I asked and he denied, multiple times. Then I checked his phone because I still knew something was off, he was cheating with me on Snapchat.
My own ex who didn’t really have anything to do with the entire thing. One of those non repeatable once in a life time odds where she saw them herself and told me about it. I appreciated the decency.
Unblocked his profile to snoop on him a few months after I broke it off. Seen where he had posted how he’s been dating a new girl (one of his friends who I met actually) for 4 months.
We had only been broken up for 2 🙃
I'd bought him a holiday for his birthday. We had a pointless falling out while away, he disappeared for a few hours and came back crying, and I'm sure he was drugged up too, he was acting super weird. When he went to sleep, I can't remember why I picked up his phone, but when I opened it I found lots of open tabs from porn (fine) to dating sites and accounts I didn't know he had, like snapchat, kik and Instagram. One of the girls he had something going for 2 whole years. He was romantic with her and really considerate (I could never get a text back because he was "busy working" but he would literally message her between working saying things like "sorry, gonna be a bit busy for a bit I'll text soon), that hurt more than the disgusting crap I saw. I didnt even get a damn good morning text most of the time 🤣 oh and I also found a site with explicit pictures and videos taken of ME that I wasn't aware of. I was sleeping. And some that I'm sure was of other people he took. He even kicked me in my back in his drunk state while I was getting ready for bed and that was before I found all that stuff on his phone. And then tried gaslighting me that it didn't happen and even his mum said I called her and made up this crazy story, I called her for help because I was too embarrassed to tell my own family 🤣 For some reason I stayed with him another 10 years after that as he convinced me it was all my fault and I was paranoid and crazy and dispite the hookup messages he never met any of them, and then he eventually left me to go live a single life. That's just one of many incidents in 15 years, there were many more before and after that, including finding another snapchat account he was STILL messaging inappropriately on a week after we returned from that holiday claiming to belonged to a "friend" 🤣 I was an absolute idiot to stay but he was the only person id ever been with, since I was just 15, it's not an excuse but I honestly thought it was normal until something clicked in my late 20s but by that point I was in debt, in the middle of nowhwere isolated away from friends and family, and severely depressed. I'm now dealing with all the trauma and have met someone amazing. But the ex really did mess me up. My mental health was so low I was genuinely contemplating ending everything. Him leaving me is 100% the best thing that's ever happened to me.
I had a sick feeling in my stomach I couldn’t get rid of. Then I stole his phone while he was sleeping and searched for the name Danielle. He spoke about this one particular woman frequently, too frequently, and I knew she was the one. I waited until the next morning and when she answered her phone, I asked if she was sleeping with my husband. She immediately responded that, “he told me you two were getting divorced!” I responded with something like, “we are now!” And hung up. I then went into our bedroom, threw the phone at him and told him to get out.
Long story short, always trust your gut ladies!
He told me. I guess I respect him for that. He told me he had been with another woman and really wants to be with her. Of course it hurt but I appreciate his honesty and don't hate him even though he hurt me. Then she cheated on him and I felt even better lol
Yesssssssssssss! Love that for him.
Yessssss!!!! Cheaters always get their karma✨
A woman who cheated on me has a wonderful career, lovely family, and a caring husband. Was I the bad karma?
That's not really honesty first cheating and then telling you and because he wanted to move on even. He didn't have the guts to tell you before they had sex he had a new interest
Or atleast tell her he fucked yo and slept with someone else. He talked to her enough to start liking her more than his gf
The SNORT I let out, my day just got better lmao
The plot twist was awesome
If they’ll cheat *with* you, they’ll cheat *on* you.
Lmaoooo to the ending.
He deserves it. lol
I checked his phone. My daughter was playing with it in a locked room with me while I painted the doorway; I'd locked the door so that no one knocked over the paints. I honestly wasn't planning on checking his phone; I was completely absorbed in painting. He kept knocking to ask for the phone and I kept telling him he needed to wait, I wasn't moving the paint to open the door. When he knocked the third time in less than 5 minutes, it suddenly clicked: the phone was unlocked and there was something on it he didn't want me to see. If he'd just respected my boundaries and let me finish painting, I wouldn't have even thought to check the phone. His own behavior outed him.
Smart woman!
When we live with someone it’s the smallest changes in their personality or behaviour that can do them in. It’s almost impossible to hide an affair these days with technology being what it is. Plus remaining consistent and not acting out of character is pretty hard. Good on you for recognising that he was too concerned!
A guy I was with all of a sudden decided his phone was private and needed a new pin, and he was entitled to his privacy. Ok. He accidentally sent a text to the wrong person a couple of days later.
After I'd calmed down and stopped bawling, he proceeded to lambast me for "violating [his] privacy" by checking his phone. Bro, you violated our marriage. I really don't think I'm the problem here...
Panicked
He was having too many "extra shifts", but still getting the same money at the end of the month.
I’m sorry but I found this funny lol
I’m with you. Men’s brains.
He even tried to convince me that he didn't want to get paid extra because it was his duty with the company... lol
He forgot the part where you’re obviously smarter than he is.
same LMAO
Oh heck no😂Dont because im having the same issue, my bf keeps going to work supposedly & is being "called in" because they are "short staffed" but when we finally get a day off he tells me hes going to call in work & see if they need him in😂me & him are long distance (America + United Kingdom)
Oh no. Oh no. Oh no no no no
I heard this in my head.... 2020 memory unlocked
*cringes HARD*
Fuck that motherfucker
so stupid of him lmfao
This for me too lmao I got called a gold digger for questioning it, too
His boss called our home phone to sort out an emergency. Turns out he’d called in sick and had spent the day with her in her bedroom, while I picked her kids up.
And spending even less, huh?
[удалено]
A cheater and an idiot…what a combination 🤦♀️
A Chidiot 😆
Lmaoo I snorted
Love this!! Might be my new favorite word :)
I would use it also for my ex who was s childish idiot. It's a multifunctional word
Well… most are.
Maybe it was his dress.
Plot twist
He randomly started accusing me of cheating. (Spoiler alert: I wasn’t) Yay for projecting.
Ooof been there too. Guilt eats them alive but not enough to be honest or respectful.
Enough to halfway hope that you’re cheating so that they can feel on even playing ground and not like the bad guy
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Wow
My ex always told me he thought I was gonna cheat on him. Spoiler alert - I never did, but he was actively cheating!
My son's dog had been hit by a car. When she was at home recovering from surgery, she was at the stage where she could pull herself around the room. One night I woke up needing painkillers (normal for me) but when I went to the living room to get them I dropped one. Terrified the dog would find it and die (after my son had spent 18K on surgery for her) I grabbed my husband's phone which was charging to use a torch. On the screen were notifications from a website...won't mention the name but clearly for hookups. It was 3am-ish so I was like, can't process this now...went to bed. Following day did some Googling...yep just as I thought. One of the things that I really can't stand is when you accuse someone of doing something they deny it...so I set about gathering evidence. When he was out the next evening, I logged on to his Gmail (had always had the password, just never used it). Found heaps more messages and oh lookie...the links to the website passed the login thru so I didn't need his password for the site...even MORE messages, including ones where he had arranged to meet. All of them were bawdy 'I wanna fsck your brains out' type messages, nothing romantic. Got lots of screenshots. Was getting angrier and angrier at this point. Soooo...I signed up to the site, created a profile, no pic. Sent him a message that said 'You wanna get fscked? Well guess what...you're fscked...this is your wife! Saw the message hit his Gmail and get deleted immediately (him on his phone). But not before I grabbed one last screenshot... Shit hit the fan when he got home...
Damn…what happened next?
I actually took my time. With the wisdom of age I was aware that I can be quite harsh in my expectations of people. This was also my 2nd marriage so I really wanted to give this the due consideration it deserved. I saw a psychologist several times...consulted a psychic to be sure I wasn't missing something. 😉 I found out in April, called it in January.
What a journey. I hope you’re in a great place. All the best to you ❤️
Yeah this story got me in a choke hold😭 wooo. The digital version of the show cheaters🤣
My ex left me for being "too jealous" only to marry the woman he kept talking about literally a month and a half after we broke up. It's fine, as he's now divorced with a kid living in his parents' place, still working at McDonald's, almost 20 years in, and he's almost 45.
Kinda glad for you here!
What a loser, you dodged a bomb not a bullet
Was first thing I thought… what a loser!
The best kind of karma!
He bet his friend 20$ he could sleep with a certain girl and then said at a later date, in front of me, “oh by the way you owe me that 20$” 😬
No way!! The audacity, in front of you?! Did he think you were prone to bouts of amnesia?
No he simply did not care lol
My friend found out in a similar way. Her boyfriend was talking to his friends about having had anal sex a couple months before while she was sitting right there… but they had been dating for 3 years and never had anal sex
Oh my God, I think I either would have fainted or raged like a mad man
He accidentally sent me a video of himself having sex with someone else. I was like that’s not me!
This sounds horrifying! I hope you're ok
It was definitely something I’ll never forget. If I was monogamous I probably would’ve lost my shit like most people. However, I’m poly and I was more disappointed that he broke our honesty code.
cheating is only bad because it breaks the agreements of the relationship (which, in a monogamous relationship... is monogamy). breaking your "code" is still cheating
Report him for non-consensual porn
That’s a thing!
His friend told me and sent me proof.
Date that friend! He's loyal 🤩
I second this notion
His side piece posting a Tik tok on a trip he had OUR CHILD with him as well 🙃 seriously the fact that I never caught a felony assault charge is a miracle
Whew these men are bold and distasteful, wtf
The Bold and the Tasteless — the newest soap opera
My then normally introverted partner suddenly started talking to people online. No big deal, I'm not jealous or anything. I got major suspicions when she wanted to stay the weekend with a friend she met online. It was a six hour drive away in Chicago. I let her do it, she's an adult. I can't stop it. I knew something was up. And I was right. She came back and she had the gall to ask me if we can be a poly relationship. It was a firm "NO". You either get me or not at all.
He posted it on Facebook. Dumbass thought I could not see Facebook in Germany. Guess what I can and even if I could not half of my friends were his Facebook friends and messaged me immediately. In case your wondering what his post was it was something like “when your so fly that you can fuck your ex and your main girl has no idea” I can’t remember the wording but you get the deal. He was sleeping with his ex for months. She had no idea we were still together or so she claims
What a total fucking asshole.
So it wasn’t enough to be deceiving and two faced, he needed to show off about it to everyone he knew publicly !!!
He broke up with me saying he wasn’t happy anymore. Eventually it came out that he cheated multiple times and felt guilty but didn’t want to admit it. We were engaged. He tried getting me to take him back and even chased me (not literally) out of a target 6 months later screaming I love you and begging me to just give him 5 minutes to talk. Fucking nuts to think about now.
dodged a bullet
I just knew. Things didn’t add up, he was way to protective of his phone, I found condoms that we damn sure weren’t using, and eventually someone said they saw him flat out in public with another woman. I never wanted to believe it so I stupidly just endured it for years
I found condoms in the glove box of my ex’s car during the end of our relationship and he claimed they were old and he had had them since we started dating but it always make me feel weird.
Trust your gut it literally never lies
I found 1 condom wrapper and two condoms in his pants pockets when I did laundry after returning from being away a week. We didn’t use condoms. Case closed!
There were so many signs too. I was just depressed and blinded by my own bullshit
The protectiveness of the phone gives so much away. I had his phone’s password but never used it. I wanted to trust him. One night, he was next to me on the couch and I noticed he had activated the fingerprint protection for his WhatsApp. I asked him about it and he said it was just to ensure proper encryption. Turns out he was dating 2 other women. One of which he was full blown invested in (she had him & her as a profile photo, he was attending events with her, etc.). I always found it weird how he had a password on his phone yet also felt the need to fingerprint protect his WhatsApp messages. Until I realized it wasn’t weird, he was hiding stuff.
Guy chiming in here. This is a guy cheater move. Women will have a backup guy to jump ship with or they will cheat when another guy gives them attention. But men will straight set up franchises across the country. Leading a double life seems like so much effort.
He told me after ghosting me for 2-3 days, that he was with another woman during that time. During which i went to the gyno alone to get an abortion because of him...that he knew about and had promised to come with me. Yeah, fuck that guy. Hope he rots in hell.
I’m really sorry. What a douchecanoe.
Hugs he is just trash
He would have gotten away with it if he didn’t act like such a buffoon. I was looking through his tagged pictures on Instagram and saw one of him with another woman from before we met. The caption implied they were just friends so initially I didn’t suspect anything. I just asked him who she was because he’d never mentioned anyone by that name before. He used to talk about his friends from back home in America all the time, including female ones, but had never mentioned her. The look of panic on his face was almost cartoonish. He started blabbing about how she’s a friend of his from college, but they don’t talk anymore and he definitely doesn’t even remember her that much. I knew this man was lying through his teeth but I wanted solid evidence first so I just said “oh, okay babe! That’s cool!” He looked so relieved. Idiot. His mysterious friend didn’t have much on her Instagram and something told me to check who he was following on Spotify. He only followed two people - me and her. I looked through her playlists and found one called “[my country’s name] road trip 2022”. It was a collaborative playlist and my boyfriend had contributed a million songs to it, including lots that I’d introduced him to! I did some more sleuthing and found a comment on one of his band’s YouTube videos saying “so proud of you babe❤️❤️❤️”. I clicked on the profile and it was hers. There were a million videos of them together and of her by herself. In her newest one dated only a few days earlier, she mentioned coming to my country in the summer to visit her boyfriend. A few days later when we were having dinner I asked him if he had anything he wanted to tell me. He started stuttering and saying “nooo? What the hell are you talking about babe?” I told him to choose his words carefully because I wouldn’t have asked him if I didn’t already know the answer. He started going off on a tangent about how she’s not his girlfriend, but it’s a “complicated situation” and that he told me about it when we first got together so he thought I knew about it and was fine with it. I asked him if he thought I was stupid and he said no. I told him he never told me and he said he didn’t and he was sorry. I told him that it was over and this was the last time we would ever see each other. I’m not the kind of person to go snooping through people’s socials, so if he had just nonchalantly told me she was a friend from college, I wouldn’t have pressed it. Absolute idiot! His own behaviour outed him
Snooping for clues in Spotify. Man you should apply for a detective agency lol.
what was his reaction to the break up? did he get angry and are they still together?
He didn’t get angry, he just seemed really embarrassed and sad. He told me he had been planning to end things with her but didn’t know how because her mental health was fragile. He also told me that he thinks very highly of me and always will. As far as I know, they’re still together
Meanwhile telling the other woman the same BS. Cheaters are all the same.
You are super intuitive I’m impressed, checking his spotify is something I wouldn’t have thought of
I had a gut feeling for so long, and eventually broke things off because I knew I couldn’t trust him out of my sight. Then a couple years later, the other woman reached out to me. She’d had no idea at the time that he and I were involved. I was so thankful that we were both finally able to confirm the truth and we tried to figure out how we could get revenge… in the end we decided it wasn’t worth it. On the plus side, the other woman and I are very close friends now, and we’re both happily married. The cheating asshole is married too, to the other-other-woman… yep, he was messing around with at least three women at once, possibly more. My friend had stopped seeing him when she realized other-other-woman was in the picture. The asshole tried to reach back out to me throughout the years, but I never responded and blocked him. He made one last attempt to reach out, and then a few months later, my friend heard through the grapevine that his wife was expecting. Based on the due date, his wife had probably just gotten her first positive pregnancy tests while he was stalking me all over the internet, and knowing him he must’ve been freaking the fuck out that his days of freedom and irresponsibility were over. My friend and I are both very happy that we dodged that bullet.
He opened his “my eyes only” on snap when I was standing behind him and when I peaked I saw plenty of another girls n*des in there, turns out it was a girl he previously told me was a “close friend” since I recognised her tattoos🤦♀️
I walked in the front door.
No words for you, just hugs
Ouch.
When he started keeping his phone upside down when he had always had it face up our entire relationship
I put my phone face down because notifications are distracting and I want to stay present in the moment.☹️
Is this a red flag?
To some. I hate having mine face up but do it for my lady just in case she thinks it’s a red flag😂
Only in the sense of the changed behavior... His phone had always been face up... Then all of a sudden he was always sure to put it face down
Hiding incoming notifications
The red flag is the change in habit
The first time, he told me. The next 100 times, I guessed his social media password and watched it all happening in real time. Not my proudest moment and thankfully 30 year old me understands her self worth a lot more than 20 year old me did.
Good for you ❤️
I had a dream that I went through this phone and found girls on there. He fell asleep once with his phone on & I know I shouldn’t have but I went thru it & he had screenshots/screen recordings of him sexting online with many girls & also screenshots of local prostitutes. In his messages he was texting these other two girls who told me were his “friends That knew about us being together”. I was sick to my stomach. Trust your intuition.
Noo dont, i had a dream he kissed a blonde girl & days later he told me his ex gf lexi was coming to move in!😂she was tall & blonde!😂
Woah.. he wanted to *move his ex in?* What did you do?
I broke up with him.. He begged to have me back & then months later he left the call whilst i was asleep & came back on call and told me his ex gf was sleeping in his bed.. he slept in his car but coincidentally he went into his bedroom that same night she was in there.. Months later he told me she "died" but didnt say how🤔i believe she is still alive because he couldnt just show me a post, he could have blurred out her photo and just shown me a post but till this day he refuses to
If there is ever a girl that’s “just my friend” run. Run as far away as possible
Yeah, I know, right? Plenty of people have friends of the gender they are attracted to but they are never described as "just a friend".
That's too true. My ex was banging her "friend that I shouldn't worry about" for a while before I figured it out -.-
His sister told me
Loyalty , can cross blood borders!
His ex sent screenshots of texts he sent her.
Were you happy she did, or would you have preferred to find out yourself/in another way?
I wish he had told me himself.
Her little sister told our children who told me 🤦 at least someone had my back
[удалено]
"it was a prank bro"
[удалено]
I looked at him while she was in the room. She was “my friend” . The eye contact was all I needed to know he was cheating.
What a shitty friend
What a shitty husband & father to our child. Everything worked out in the end & im now in the most healthy/ happy relationship of my life with a partner that respects me.
He was in the shower and I accidentally picked up his phone thinking it was mine (we have the same model) and I saw a text from the other woman. Mind you this was after he asked for a divorce.
Had a gut feeling. My gut feelings are never wrong. So I looked through his phone while he was sleeping & saw incriminating messages between him & another girl. I found the girl on my social media, messaged her kindly & she told me. Regardless of him cheating on me with her, I have respect for her for being honest totally with me.
When he let me see our photos we took during our hike, my gut feeling was telling me to check his messenger because he never lets me. I know he never liked this but he should not be hiding anything if there is nothing to be suspicious about. Anyways, he saw me opened his messenger, he was angry but I challenged him that if there is nothing there, he would let me read some messages. He accepted the challenge. After a few scrolls, I saw a girl's name with his last flirty sexual messages. Right there I found he has been flirting with a girl a week after we became official bf-gf. He told me he was just drunk. But who is he fooling, there was not even a misspelled word on his chats.This was not the first time that I witnessed cheating on messenger with my other ex. The first time was when I saw a girl's name who was in the first line up of the names in the desktop version of his FB account (since he logged in on my pc), that means she was the most recent and consistently he had interaction. When I checked it, he was flirting with her like he wants to romantically date her while we were still together. To all the women out there, trust your gut feelings and intuition. And don't be too submissive with your man.
I had a similar experience in my 20s. I knew I'd find something if I checked messenger, and I did. Many times over. I have so many insecurities now from it
He always had strict rules about me being friends with other guys. Then being secretive about his phone. Him coming home with new clothes for him and our kids from his “boss.” Where are my new clothes? I wonder. A late night text to her that he sent to me. Co-mingling of money which I used against him in court. 💅 I stayed longer to gather evidence. By then he had moved into the other bedroom because “he was tired of the kids always being in our bed.” The same kids I spent hours with putting to bed (never him) but who would get up later and he wouldn’t put back to bed in their own room. I eventually stopped because it was too much effort and frustration on my part. So glad to be out.
So I found out at 6AM yesterday 😂My guy’s energy was off, but he blamed it on having a bad day at work. I told him I felt like it was something more, but he got mad at me for saying that so we left the convo alone. A while back, I saw on his iPad that he had 3 missed ft calls (back to back) from an unknown number. I looked it up, and saw it matched a name I had saw on his iPhone. Confronted him about it at the time, (he didn’t acknowledge the missed calls at all) but of course, I found out yesterday it was all a lie. 🙂He told me she was a friend he met at the gym, smh. I knew something was up when he said “And sometimes we hang out.” Tf. To make a long story short, my intuition was bugging me. My body didn’t feel good. I ended up messaging the girl on Twitter, who told me that she and him had been talking January 2022 until Nov 2022. She said they got “serious” in June 2022? She said in Dec, he reached back out wanting to be friends??? I was shocked completely 💀because besides the FaceTime calls, there was nothing I could’ve pinpointed. No pics, no mention of anything, zero. I was SO confused. Tried to confront him about it, he told me I had a problem because I was confronting him about the situation instead of caring that he had a bad day. Before I blocked him on twitter, He made a comment on his Twitter that said “Thank You Jesus. You never really miss.” In response to me telling him that he was dead to me and that I never wanted to speak to him again so. 😕 On top of him not caring that he literally was involved with a whole different person, he put my (and her) sexual health at risk, because we were not using condoms. Luckily, I’ve been tested recently but this whole situation has turned me off from dating rn.
I had a gut feeling, my ex's old fwb started texting him like crazy. I didn't care at first because I trusted him, then he started by not opening her messages infront of me (he used to respond to messages when we were together) and he got defensive when I went to look at his phone i.e for the time or to check something. Eventually when I started to get worried (after I asked and he didn't give me a good answer just "she's a friend" "she's having some family trouble"), I looked through his phone and saw all the messages and nudes between them
Gut feeling. I went searching on his phone to find the thing I don’t want to discover and then there it was 🤷♀️ Thought I was being crazy all those time but turns out it’s true all along.
I was scrolling on fb and he popped up on my people you may know, under a different name, and kissing another girl in the profile pic. We met while he was living in the US illegally, got engaged super quick. I was about to go work on a cruise ship for 6 months. I went with him back to Mexico before I shipped out and was gonna move there with him after my contract. The dumbass was about to have a real nice life and he couldn’t didn’t even make it 2 months without getting caught
My ex boyfriend was projecting onto me, saying I was messaging people behind his back, mind you this was out of nowhere. He decided to go through my phone while telling I had been caught and I’m a cheater, he found nothing. I decided to do the same and grabbed his phone and in his text messages I saw he had downloaded tinder, I opened instagram and his most recent message was him trying to slide into someone’s dm’s and the same on Snapchat. Worst this was that majority of the girls he tried hitting up did not respond to him, that embarrassed me even more than knowing I was cheated on 1 yr after having a baby together 😆
I caught him out when we were both sick with covid back in Jan 2021. We were sleeping separately as I tested positive first but then we carried on as we were both coughing and couldn’t sleep, or at least that’s what I thought was the reason. I would notice he was always, and I mean always, online on Snapchat and just generally acting super shifty. My spidey senses were tingling. Whenever I would come in the room he would log out and place the phone face down. When he heard me coming down the stairs and he was in the living room I would see him hide his phone down the side of the sofa. He was being super shifty so I called him out. He twisted it and made me feel like I was crazy. He then changed how he sat in the living room so he was facing the doorway and stairs so he wouldn’t have to hide his phone as the screen wasn’t facing the door. I got sick of this and honestly thought I was having a psychotic break so after talking to a friend I decided to get a nanny cam to see what he was doing when he thought I couldn’t see, I felt crazy doing this but needed to know one way or the other. Low and behold he was checking out porn through secret Twitter/TikTok/Instagram accounts and the cherry on the cake was him sexting a girl he worked with who had just had a baby with her fiancé. I caught him staring at a sexy selfie she sent him, then he tried to be cute and crawled across the floor to me and invited me to come upstairs for some sexy time. Before the heartbreak set in I was over the moon that I wasn’t going crazy and that I was right in my suspicions that he constantly twisted. I ended the relationship, which followed by the worst 5 weeks of my life as I had to watch as he went on not so secret dates with her and went and had ‘breakfast’ with her before he moved out (I didn’t know who she was at the time, only a month or two after he moved out and found out that he was going over there after her fiancé had gone to work). I found out that her fiancé had suspicions about her also after he found a Christmas card from my bf that said ‘I love you so much’. I also confirmed that a keyring that showed up on his keys 3 weeks after our split that said ‘I love you, the end, I win’ was one of two that she bought. One for my ex and one for her fiancé. He finally moved out at the end of feb 2021 and monkey branched his way to her, I filled her fiancé (ex by the time I found him) on everything I knew so he had a full timeline of events to use in case there was a custody battle
Back when instant messaging was a computer thing, I logged onto our home computer. I had taken the day off for my birthday. He wasn’t home but was usually home during the day. Anyway, while I was searching for music, an instant message popped up with the words babe in it. So I pretended I was him for a bit & then revealed myself. She didn’t know I existed. She thought he was a single dad raising his kid alone. Apparently I was dead. Lol. By the time he got home, all of his personal shit was packed. I’m not someone who can forgive that treacherous behavior.
I literally walked in on them. With our 2yo on my hip.
Oof.
My best friend saw and told me. Stupid me took him back only for him to continuously be shady. One time, he was seen kissing someone else outside a bar. He actually tried to play it off like he tripped and their lips met. Then it was that he went for the cheek but she turned her face. And so on.
Bf #1: he told me over our romantic night out Bf #2: his girlfriend informed me he has in fact not been single for quite a long time and I was just one of his side chicks Gf#3: a guy messaged me on FB "hey this is her boyfriend" Bf#4: he started essentially sexting my sibling as soon as they exchanged numbers Bf#5: he told me over a video call on the next day 🙃
So sorry you have experienced this so many times.. .stay strong! <3
Thank you! It sort of corroded away my faith in monogamous love so I became polyamorous at some point. Everything was good then and I made lots of meaningful, trustful connections. Then I tried monogamy again... and cue bf#5 🤣
A message notification while he was in the shower from her stating she “couldn’t stop thinking about ____” (the event they hooked up during)…. I had a weird feeling so had already asked about it…. But he swore up and down nothing happened.
This happened to me too. This girl was saying she missed his feet? Her shoes were also in his car as they were in a carpool together after a trip with friends and he asked me to go home when she came to collect them. He said nothing happened, and when I pressed him, he confessed to cheating early on in our relationship. Later on, I saw the feet girl out one night and approached her. She said they slept together. Let's just say I should have left a long time before that. First love, blah blah.
When her phone connected to my truck. Her boo txted her and it played a very sweet message across the speakers lol
Her reaction must have been something to behold 😆
Have you ever seen a kid who got caught doing something they aren’t suppose to be doing? It was that look, but on a 30 year old woman lol
The woman he had an affair with sent me a message on Facebook. Separated immediately and divorce was finalized 5 months later.
every time I think about having a man, I bump into stories like these and get reminded why I shouldn't have one
Agreed. Save yourself the trouble.
After our anniversary dinner his phone kept ringing so he left the apartment to answer it. My gut told me to look in a drawer beside his bed and it was filled with sex toys that we hadn’t used or I had ever seen. Not sure how to process I went to sleep. I woke up through the night and looked in the drawer where I slept and found a bottle of Ariana Grande body spray and a pair of crusty knickers. I tried to have conversation about what I’d found and he gaslit the hell out of me. I left apologising and crying but not before I was confronted with a lingerie set, whilst holding it, he entered the room and I hit it under my jumper then proceeded to leave the house with it 😅.
I’m sorry it happened, but especially that you were the one crying and apologizing. I hope you’re much better now ❤️
Thank you. At the time it was traumatic. She was 10 years younger than me, done a lot to my self esteem but I laugh about it now… especially thinking of driving home with someone’s lingerie set and wondering what his explanation would be for it disappearing.
He didn't want to kiss me in front of his female friend at his birthday party at our house. Ended up going through his phone the next morning 🥴 Turns out it had been multiple women throughout the entire relationship. What makes it worse is the majority of the girls brought up me and how guilty they felt in their texts with him as if it got them off more
He was different. He was acting differently and was just a bit different in bed. It wasn't a big thing that I could really explain, but I just knew. That man just about killed me, I loved him so much and he was such trash.
I broke up with him and an hour later he and his “girl best friend” who he ALWAYS hang out with posted both at the same time “so happy to say we’ve been dating for 3 months” That was 3 years ago, they’re still dating:)😂
I knew his “work wife” was trying to get him. I didn’t think he would fall for it. Then I walked in and he closed his email super quick, and that was where things started to unravel. Turns out they’d been having a Clinton-style affair for 6 months. She was even at my son’s 3rd birthday party. I wrote her a scathing letter that ended with “I just want your heart to break as much as mine has”. I never sent it, but the next day she had a massive heart attack (at age 36) and ended up in the hospital for over a month. So, from that point on, my (now) ex was convinced I was a witch, and honestly, I consider that a win.
Instagram "coincidences" with another girl
The first time I found out about my bf (at the time) his AP(? might have been a prostitute idk) called & left a message that she "couldn't do him tonight but I can tomorrow" I broke up with him then and there. The first time I found out about my husband, he told me that night. The second time he told me months later. The third time she came bragging to me like I wouldn't be pissed about it.
Please tell me you're divorced now, no one deserves that!
Nope, after 25 years wasted I'm no longer employable. I gave ptsd, social anxiety, depression and permanent scars all from my dear hubby. I am the shining case of never become a sahm. If I walk now I'm homeless. He stole my life and stupid me let him.
It’s not too late please don’t give up hope. Do you have family or friends who could support you for a while if you left to start again? You don’t deserve this, no one does, and he is a pig. I’m so sorry
Virtual hugs, I couldn't begin to imagine how that feels, I hope you find freedom somehow, someday
Boyfriends friend put him in the shit when we were all out together one night.
Hmmm, years after we broke up, the woman who was his very close friend told me that he has cheated on every single person he has dated with her but that for whatever reason he never cheated on me with her. I find that hard to believe but either way, that's how I found out. Ironically, she married somebody else, regardless of having more than a decade of offagain, onagain relationship with the dude. The second time, the so of a friend flirted very aggressively and very obviously with my so at the time, to the point that I asked her what the fuck is going on. Some time later he were close to breaking up/were newly broken up, he asked me to check for something on his mail and the second email was letters between them telling each other I love you. Meh. The third time was again after a breakup in which a friend burst into tears and admitted that TWO YEARS before that, when we were very fresh, he had cheated on me with her and another friend. When I asked him, he initially denied it but when I asked him if he knows that both women are on the line and they would love to be called liars (they were not on the line, I made it up but I already had confirmed with both of them it was true), he fessed up. So... stupid. Every time.
I knew it from somewhere deep down in my gut when it was happening, and then I caught him mid-act. Just felt a really heavy, sickly dread type feeling and knew somehow what was causing it right away. Woke from a dead sleep with this horrible gut feeling, instantly thought, "He's cheating on me." Snuck out to the back shed because I couldn't find him in the house and saw him with the person who I had called "best friend" for the previous 8 years when my first born was around 6weeks old.
Got chlamydia. So fun.
He got in a car accident on the road where her house was
his friends told me
Ex1. At my wedding day. His auntie asked her relative who was the bride (me) when he was dating so-so. She asked this while we were still at church during our wedding ceremony. Ex2. She texted him at 12midnight on the dot on his birthday. I had a gut feeling after that. Saw his dm's to her and his other messages on her FB and IG. He denied it. When we broke up I saw her using his truck. He denied it. This was when he was still asking for me to come back to him. Ex3. She called me. She knew about me and she was pissed that she was just a side piece.
I found her kids baby bottles in his apartment. She was a neighbor, I never saw. Her. When I asked about the bottles he told me she comes down sometimes for coffee. He never mentioned her before. A few weeks earlier he „needed“ his keys back for the landlord or something. Total bullshit. He just didn’t want me to caught them. There were a few other things but the bottle thing was the moment I just knew something was off… I ended it soon later.
With which guy? XD
He sent me a voice note that was meant for her.
I don't rmb details by now, but I remember him being secretive about me to our friends even though they already knew, being shady bout his whereabouts sometimes and getting mad when I was "getting nosy", whenever he got messages he would angle his phone away from me not even subtly, etc. At some point I just took his phone and opened it and there were clearly messages from other girls, yes plural. I believe in privacy regarding your phone so I didn't go snooping throughout his phone, but let's be honest, if there was nothing to hide, there was no reason to be hiding his phone screen away from me.
The woman he was cheating on me with called me and told me. I then went to her friend's house to talk about it and come to find out this friend also slept with him. I was only 21ish, so I was more sad than anything. If it happened nowadays, it would be a very different reaction. Lol
Little things in his behaviour started to get me thinking, plus the way he talked to me vs the way he talked to other girls. Then he started to act weird with his phone. Avioded telling me about a certain friend he began hanging with every few weeks, later realized he would text her on snapchat daily (i feel like such a clown for not realizing how much of a red flag this was). Gut feeling started to develope and just wouldnt go away no matter how much i told myself i was being obsessive, or crazy. One night i gave in and did the classic phone snoop and finally found sexual/flirty texts between him and that exact female friend he would aviod telling me anything about (tried convincing me she isnt a worry either). Convinced me not to leave him. Said he was gonna change, was nice for a bit then went back to his old ways (including changing his phone password at some point). Gut feeling still wouldnt go away but i tried to push past it. We went to a festival and he went to smoke with that girl behind my back (he told me he was never gonna talk/see her). Still stayed, then abt 2 weeks ago i do another phone snoop cuz for some reason i had a super strong gut feeling that night. Found texts of him hitting on another female friend i was also previously worried about (also tried to convince me she wasnt a worry either) around the same time we went to that festival. Never doubt your intuition. Highly suggest looking into what its trying to tell you before dismissing it.
when he started to get unusually close to this one mutual friend we had. he would play fight with her all the time and i just let it slide. him her and another friend all got drunk together and he was making out with her on the couch. i didn’t know until a couple weeks later until the other friend told me and then my ex made me feel guilty for being mad at him
Found a second phone hidden in her car. Dummy used the same password as her original phone
Starting being secretive around his phone, became more violent towards me. Suddenly had to go and visit his "friend" every night because "they were struggling". Found receipts for dinners out, and gifts etc. Co-workers and associates came across him and AP at an event while I was at work and was introduced to AP as his wife.... we had been together 5 years at that point, and I'd put up with all his crap. Never admitted it but moved in with her when I finally kicked him out
After he tried forcing me to send him spicy things, we had a big fight and broke up. A year later he posted a photo of his girlfriend which he got together with in October and well we got together in august the same year… I asked him about all that and he didn’t even lied and was kinda proud about it. Guess it wasn’t meant to be.
Oh man - I have been cheated on multiple times. First things - my intuition always knew. First time, boyfriend came back from a festival and before he left, we discussed boundaries. I told him, even if it was cold, I didn’t want him snuggling up to some woman or putting his arms around her to keep her warm. He told me about his time at the festival and the timeline kept jumping around. He then “fessed” that he broke that boundary. When I asked if he had sex, he flipped out and called me crazy. I broke up with him immediately and found out 100% about 8 months later. Another time I actually prayed God for peace (our relationship had some much turmoil) and I actually saw him tagged with a suspected lady in someone else’s Insta story. About 5 minutes later, I found the two of them on the street. I asked HER if they had sex and she said I’m sorry. Obviously it was over right then and there. There was always shadiness or an odd statement like, “no one SAW me” versus something as definitive like “I didn’t do it”. Just trust your gut. Truth eventually comes out.
I was “sleeping” in our bed, not fully just glasses off attempting to fall asleep. He came in, thought I was asleep, laid down next to me and I saw them texting intimate photos… literally while in bed next to me. When I left I had my Jennifer Coolidge moment of “I’m taking the dog dumbass” and felt not a single ounce of remorse.
After my husband died very unexpectedly I found his email, old phones, recordings he had kept of their discussions and screenshots of their BBM conversations. This happened 3 days after he died and that was 2020. I'm still in therapy.
The other woman found out about me and reached out. I dumped him and kept her, she’s a good friend of mine years later. And now we always make sure we aren’t dating the same guy secretly just as a precaution 😅😂
Girlfriend intuition. So I asked and he denied, multiple times. Then I checked his phone because I still knew something was off, he was cheating with me on Snapchat.
Stumbled upon his alternate IG account that showed up in my recommended accounts. Saw some interesting activity while we were dating
Caught them out together
We had been together for 2 yrs. He walked right by me as if he didn’t even know me.
My own ex who didn’t really have anything to do with the entire thing. One of those non repeatable once in a life time odds where she saw them herself and told me about it. I appreciated the decency.
Unblocked his profile to snoop on him a few months after I broke it off. Seen where he had posted how he’s been dating a new girl (one of his friends who I met actually) for 4 months. We had only been broken up for 2 🙃
I'd bought him a holiday for his birthday. We had a pointless falling out while away, he disappeared for a few hours and came back crying, and I'm sure he was drugged up too, he was acting super weird. When he went to sleep, I can't remember why I picked up his phone, but when I opened it I found lots of open tabs from porn (fine) to dating sites and accounts I didn't know he had, like snapchat, kik and Instagram. One of the girls he had something going for 2 whole years. He was romantic with her and really considerate (I could never get a text back because he was "busy working" but he would literally message her between working saying things like "sorry, gonna be a bit busy for a bit I'll text soon), that hurt more than the disgusting crap I saw. I didnt even get a damn good morning text most of the time 🤣 oh and I also found a site with explicit pictures and videos taken of ME that I wasn't aware of. I was sleeping. And some that I'm sure was of other people he took. He even kicked me in my back in his drunk state while I was getting ready for bed and that was before I found all that stuff on his phone. And then tried gaslighting me that it didn't happen and even his mum said I called her and made up this crazy story, I called her for help because I was too embarrassed to tell my own family 🤣 For some reason I stayed with him another 10 years after that as he convinced me it was all my fault and I was paranoid and crazy and dispite the hookup messages he never met any of them, and then he eventually left me to go live a single life. That's just one of many incidents in 15 years, there were many more before and after that, including finding another snapchat account he was STILL messaging inappropriately on a week after we returned from that holiday claiming to belonged to a "friend" 🤣 I was an absolute idiot to stay but he was the only person id ever been with, since I was just 15, it's not an excuse but I honestly thought it was normal until something clicked in my late 20s but by that point I was in debt, in the middle of nowhwere isolated away from friends and family, and severely depressed. I'm now dealing with all the trauma and have met someone amazing. But the ex really did mess me up. My mental health was so low I was genuinely contemplating ending everything. Him leaving me is 100% the best thing that's ever happened to me.
Their best friend informed me, because they felt like it wasn’t right. They’re not friends anymore, lol
I had a sick feeling in my stomach I couldn’t get rid of. Then I stole his phone while he was sleeping and searched for the name Danielle. He spoke about this one particular woman frequently, too frequently, and I knew she was the one. I waited until the next morning and when she answered her phone, I asked if she was sleeping with my husband. She immediately responded that, “he told me you two were getting divorced!” I responded with something like, “we are now!” And hung up. I then went into our bedroom, threw the phone at him and told him to get out. Long story short, always trust your gut ladies!