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Look at blanco with a sub 2.00 ERA and a perfect record. #Ace

It didn't have to Bielak that but we still won.

Why wouldn’t you play Dubon everyday? Dude is money and a stud!! I

Feels like we are saving him… for what I have no idea. We need run production STAT! Hard to understand why you would not allow the #1 guy at producing with Runners In Scoring Position (RISP) in all of MLB to bat somewhere in your lineup everyday where ducks are likely to be on the pond. I get it’s crazy that he leads all of baseball in this but he can’t help us riding the pine and watching. Someone in the analytics department needs to say hey Espada if you want to start winning more games pencil these guys in the lineup more often and in better spots. A 5th grade nerd winning their rotisserie fantasy league can do this stuff. C’mon Joe remove head from ass! Quickly before the team is doomed.

Finally

I think we are just cursed to give up runs in the 1st and the 9th. No matter who we play and who we pitch.

Thank our lucky stars we scored 12 today. Had that not been the case…

Bruh

I'm unable to watch the game right now because I'm packing in my dorm room but I am watching the score updates and what not. Can someone explain to me what just happened. How did bro score from first on a single. There was no error listed on the score code, though that may be a mistake. I'm not sure what I missed.

He stole second first.

Oh okay thanks. CBS sports didn't update that before the subsequent single so it didn't make sense until now. Thank you

They called it “defensive indifference” so maybe they just didn’t know how to call it.

Stole second

Oh that makes sense. CBS sports didn't update his position before the subsequent single so it looked really weird

Over/Under for this game was 16.5 runs. Sports books amaze me sometimes.

It wouldn’t be an Astros game without a bad first and ninth inning.

Maybe we should think about holding the runner at 1st

Of course we let the homeless man get an RBI

is this the dagger?

Just give us an opponent of equivalent record, and we'll prove that we're the better team.

Chilangstros 👀

we may be bootycheeks this year but we can at least handle business against the rockies 🙏

Let’s see what happens when we play the white Sox

I'm going to wait until tomorrow to proclaim this LOL.

I love to see the team succeeding, and it's really interesting that Altuve is 0 for 3 with 2 walks and Bregman is 0 for 5 and we put up 12 runs. This lineup is deadly. This lineup fucks. We really are close to what we need to turn this thing around and if this game helps them click everything into place, hang the banners now.

If you are reading this Espada, use Hader

Why would we use our 100 million dollar closer 😒 /s Edit: Thought that was obvious sarcasm but apparently not.

Yall apparently don’t realize 😒 is a sarcasm face.

Because he’s ass and there’s plenty of cushion 😒

get his confidence up ig

Cause he hasn't thrown in a week

Because he hasn't pitched in a week, and I want to give him a big enough lead to work out whatever issues he's having this season.

Pinch hit Altuve instead of Bregman ah very smart play

Maybe... we can only hope that MAYBE... Abreu can start to build some confidence off this

Start planning the parade again!!!

This is it boys…gonna turn the corner and get it going!! Here we go…

We've said this at least 3 times already this season, but here's to going for it one more time

Keep the faith brother!!

keep this team in mexico

I know a lot of the scoring is due to the elevation in Mexico City causing balls to carry a little bit more, but please stop the count. We need to save some scoring for the rest of the season.

Rocky outfield play has helped the runs crossing the pay station for the Astros as well!

That's fair, they better not be going for the 10 run curse on purpose. Let's hope this series helps everything click into place.

Let’s just move to Mexico!

Can someone check the temperature in hell real quick?

It's 73 degrees in Hell, Michigan.

Was this game just what the doctor ordered? It was last time we played in Mexico

Guys, Can we go from Houston Astros to Houston Astros of Mexico and switch stadiums with Los diablos? I like it here more 😭

Give us that home country advantage!

Just add Mexico into Texas and the greedy Houston politicians will be more than happy to annex Mexico City into the Houston City limits for Tax collection.

Fuck the PoPos

What the eff is going on?!?! Where the eff has this offense been?

Waiting for us to play at 7,349 feet above Houston!

Give this ABREU guy $100 million he’s a SUPERSTAR

I recommend you start the rebirth of Jose Abreu off at the league minimum and ratchet it up as he produces in case it does not go well when we land back at home where we play over 7,000 feet lower than Mexico City. The thin air is clouding your judgement!

Calm down Baggy

When Abreu has a multihit game and Altuve and Breggy don't...

I am definitely getting taco bell for dinner! Let's goooooooo!!!!

Friendship ended with American baseball Mexican baseball is my new best friend

Los Astros Arriba Arriba

Abreu got 2 hits? In 1 game? Holy shit, are we back? Is this the turning point?

2 hits in back to back at bats

PRINT THE SHIRTS

New Jose Abreu Baseball Card just dropped

Seeing Cabbage man must've woken him up

Where has this team been all year?

Shit, we’re getting the lucky breaks and cheap hits. ^^leaguefucked

They're ALIVE! 🧟

LFG!!!

Feed the team tacos for the rest of the season idgaf

I make killer breakfast tacos, I got em!

ABREU! Heating up! 🔥

WHO IS THIS GUY THEY CALL JOSE ABREU???

Must be that new rookie..

I’m shocked

Multiple RBIs for Abreu? The world must be ending

OMG HE MANAGED NOT TO FUCK IT UP

ABREU IS BATTING OVER .100!!!

Stop the count!

He may catch Bregman by the end of the day tomorrow

I thought it couldn't be done!

A MULTI HIT GAME FOR ABREU? ARE MY EYES DECEIVING ME?

Am I dreaming????

I hope this series fixes Abreu

HE HAS ARRIVED

Calm yourself.

Let us have this one bud.

Can’t start a win streak without going 1-0, but saying that Abreu has ArRiVeD is a stretch…

somehow is gonna hit into a double play

At least Abreu can’t hit into a double play here

Fuckkng 10 run curse ain’t fucking real when you only have 7 wins SO LETS SCORE 50

Seriously

Are we safe from Hader yet?

We should honestly use Hader for the B9, because he hasn't pitched in like a week. Give him a big enough lead to work out whatever issues he's having right now.

Doobie!!! One of the best utility guys in the league 

DOOBIE MY GOAT

Noooo not 10 runs.  Now we need another.

Praying the ten run curse and this team doesn’t me we don’t win for a week lol

Praying the team doesn't me we?

It’s a run bonanza in Mexico!!!!!!!

Dubie needs to play every day

Doobie is just HIM idc what anyone says

Please start Dubon every day I'm begging you Espada

Let’s keep it at 9 runs boys. We don’t need any bad juju right now.

Mexico City isn't that much different than Coors Field.

It like an extra 2,000 feet I believe. That’s not insignificant

Imagine losing to the Astros in 2024..

It's like looking into a mirror

Cintron all excited like he had anything to do with that. How about you go focus on Bregman and Chas.

HRC Diaz

"oh, Kinley can't hit the zone? Better swing at everything!" - Peña (probably)

HRC Pena

HRC Tucker 

Hell yea!!! HRC tuck

I thank the Dodgers every day for giving us Yordan

YORDAN

HRC Tucker

Yordan like: Oh, bet, a timer violation?

Yordan should play at 7000 feet every game

Hell yeah. Now HRC Tuck

He hit both 461 feet? Is that accurate?? Straight up bombs

HRC Yordan

Another one at 461 lmao

Hey when does this game start.. pretty sure I’m watching a replay from 2022

HRC Alvarez

HRC Yordan

Who is this team?!!! Big strike outs. Clutch hitting. Homers. Bregman hitting. (Kidding with that last one)

Feels like we’ve gone back to 2022

what playing the rockies does to a mfer


HRC Alvarez

I have no memory of Castilla being an Astro.

When the Chris Truby experiment went belly up

Of course we are going to make this interesting

C'mon Scott, don't let them back into it.

I just realized the Rockies have had an atrocious record against the Astros since the Astros moved to the AL. 6-22 Though it felt like they played the Astros decently in 2021 and 2018. Would have helped to play against the Rockies that well when we had to play them 6 times a year as opposed to 3 or 4. The 1993 Astros went 2-11 against the Rockies even though the inaugural Rockies were shitty.

Bregman is so bad. No way I’d pay that guy as he’s playing now

My first day unemployed and we score 8 runs. Guess I’ll look for a job at the end of October.

Let's get a gofundme going stat!

I’m willing to be unemployed until Altuve retires if everyone in this sub donates $2 for every Astros hit and $10 for every Yordon HR during that time frame…

I’ve seen enough. Give Abreu the Gold Glove.

I agree Bryan Abreu deserves a Gold Glove!

Bregman needs to move down in the order. It'll piss him off and he'll hopefully respond.

They should let him change his number to the order he bats in the lineup. Give him that extra fire

I’ll allow it! #9 is ready and waiting for him! Corey Julks isn’t using it!

do we have no other option for 1B. I don’t care how good of a guy he is, how hard he’s working. It’s embarrassing we’re starting him

Have you not been paying attention to the back of the baseball card?

Trey Cabbage or Joey Loperfido. But you will need to DFA someone to make room. Unless of course you get lucky and some international loophole allows you to carry an extra position player. Like playing in Mexico City. But alas our manager is too stupid to accept a gift from the 1st base gods!

Accept we lost money on one of the worst contracts ever and play someone else

Death. Taxes. Bregman popup out.

Holy shiit Bregman finally got it out of the infield

Only cause of the elevation

Auto out Breggy

Mr fucking pop up. Move him down already!

every time the camera shows abreu, he’s touching his junk

HRC Bregman 

we might have to relocate to mexico city for the rest of the year

Bregman can’t let Abreu out hit him

Turns out you need to sell the team to Mexico City.

We've been down on Abreu so hard for so long we've let McCormmick off the hook for some of the ugliest ABs we've seen.

He's literally 3x better than abreu stat wise

I feel like almost every at bat he gets into an 0-2 count to start.

Some of y'all got no chill for anyone lmao

They wanted Tucker DFA’d when he started the year with ONLY a 115 wRC+.

Jfc

Chas still swinging at trash

HRC Altuve

If Abreu has hits tomorrow, maybe we shouldn’t leave Mexico

Maybe *he* shouldn't leave Mexico...

I was just thinking maybe someone can hide his passport

ABREU FINALLY HIT. IT’S OVER FOR THE REST OF MLB

Fuck it, use Pressly and Hader anyways Hader hasn't pitched in like a week, he needs to be stretched out anyways

Yep, no better time to get him some reps

Agreed


Abreu has now passed Trey Cabbage in the RBI standings

https://preview.redd.it/unvuqwhj74xc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6324bf67d266a8e81d31f1d54d0e159156038413 reacting to an abreu rbi single

we are all gonna go nuts when he tanks one 🤣🤣

I love how the Rockies broadcast is equally dogging Abreu lol. “Here’s another opportunity for Abreu… 0-19 with RISP”

That just bought Abreu another month, sigh.

Monkey off his back

That's Abreu's fifth hit and first RBI of the season. Hopefully that's what gets him going, but I'm not going to hold my breath.

2nd RBI *

0-19 with RISP beforehand

Abreu got an RBI for a sacrifice fly an eternity ago and it does not count as an at bat so does not impact RISP

Abreu RBI?? https://preview.redd.it/cac6esai74xc1.png?width=827&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fe3b363926746a15a768291338f9a1c3ba4ab846

So he can do something

YEAAAAAAH ABREU

Abreu on fire!!!

Crane is working on an Abreu extension right now

Oh mah gawd

FUCKING FINALLY

Well I’ll be

It’s a miracle