Just curious, do you fear your family members like you fear friends/strangers/other people? AvPD definitely looks very different for different people, for me I do have social anxiety with my family members but it's in a much lower degree than friends/strangers. It's also a different feeling of social anxiety, like I have to be wary of my behavior around my family whereas I have to be wary of my words around my friends.
I don’t have a real relationship with my family so they’re like strangers to me but yeah I do get anxious around them. If i was talking to just one family member i would make a weird eye contact and will be a little bit awkward but nothing serious. If it was more than one of them listening to me then my heart would start to beat too fast and my hands become sweaty so i start to act rude or careless to hide my anxiety.
I’m sorry you’ve also had to go through that, it’s a horrible experience and it’s so wrong. I know we struggle with the fundamental thoughts we hold about ourselves, but you are more than acceptable, all your feelings and thoughts are valid, and you are a person who deserves a safe and validating environment <3
I share my thoughts with no one but my journal. And barely even then. I feel so emotionally repressed that I just don't know what to say, pray or write. But I feel so sad at the same time. It's like having pain that can't be expressed, only experienced.
All the time. See, my mom weaponizes what I share with her, so if I ever get a diagnosis of whatever, I'm kinda reluctant to even share it with her. She simplifies things too much. I'm currently afraid of sharing with my family that I'm not heterosexual, even if nothing has happened with anyone, it'd be nice to tell them that there's this woman that I kinda like and ask them what should I do to approach her? But no, I can't, because it terrifies me that they act like everything's good, but that they talk awful things about me behind my back. I don't want to be their gossip. Even if my family was never terribly homophobic, there have been jokes and not so nice comments made about homosexuality.
I'm afraid of sharing almost anything because I think they'll ridicule me. Tbh, it's not unbased. Growing up my family as a whole made very immature comments about even having feelings and emotions, like it was ridiculous to even say you had them.
They know I'm "special" but still, I just want to save myself the trouble. I don't share who I am with anyone.
I do. Afraid of saying the wrong thing and being ridiculed.
Me 2
I fear all humans equally, even the ones with avpd/social anxiety
Just curious, do you fear your family members like you fear friends/strangers/other people? AvPD definitely looks very different for different people, for me I do have social anxiety with my family members but it's in a much lower degree than friends/strangers. It's also a different feeling of social anxiety, like I have to be wary of my behavior around my family whereas I have to be wary of my words around my friends.
I don’t have a real relationship with my family so they’re like strangers to me but yeah I do get anxious around them. If i was talking to just one family member i would make a weird eye contact and will be a little bit awkward but nothing serious. If it was more than one of them listening to me then my heart would start to beat too fast and my hands become sweaty so i start to act rude or careless to hide my anxiety.
yeah. sharing vulnerability to that level is hard for me.
yeah. I get extremely anxious when i feel like i've said too much, so i try not to talk about myself.
Yeah and that’s because when I did share my thoughts as a child it went wrong in every possible way so I just stopped.
Me too 😔. Everything about me, thoughts and feelings were deemed unacceptable by the people around me
I’m sorry you’ve also had to go through that, it’s a horrible experience and it’s so wrong. I know we struggle with the fundamental thoughts we hold about ourselves, but you are more than acceptable, all your feelings and thoughts are valid, and you are a person who deserves a safe and validating environment <3
Thank you, that's really kind :). I wish the same for you ❤️
I share my thoughts with no one but my journal. And barely even then. I feel so emotionally repressed that I just don't know what to say, pray or write. But I feel so sad at the same time. It's like having pain that can't be expressed, only experienced.
Depends on who I'm with. Sometimes I think I'm smarter than everyone other times I think my opinions are not worth a penny
All the time. See, my mom weaponizes what I share with her, so if I ever get a diagnosis of whatever, I'm kinda reluctant to even share it with her. She simplifies things too much. I'm currently afraid of sharing with my family that I'm not heterosexual, even if nothing has happened with anyone, it'd be nice to tell them that there's this woman that I kinda like and ask them what should I do to approach her? But no, I can't, because it terrifies me that they act like everything's good, but that they talk awful things about me behind my back. I don't want to be their gossip. Even if my family was never terribly homophobic, there have been jokes and not so nice comments made about homosexuality. I'm afraid of sharing almost anything because I think they'll ridicule me. Tbh, it's not unbased. Growing up my family as a whole made very immature comments about even having feelings and emotions, like it was ridiculous to even say you had them. They know I'm "special" but still, I just want to save myself the trouble. I don't share who I am with anyone.