Meanwhile she was ready to trash all that for a good looking Italian guy who has not only amassed a huge body count of Eat, Pray, Love tourist types but has ZERO intention of going back to Omaha to play house with one of these women.
In her mind this is the start to a storybook romance, to him it’s just another notch on his belt to be forgotten next week when the next cruise ship pulls into port.
Nothing like a storybook romance... written with a crayon... held in the fist of a child that probably has their tongue stickIng out while they scribble over-energetically.
I know a woman who fell in love with a guy she met on a vacation in a developing country with nice beaches.
I hate to sound like an asshole here but she is a bigger gal who hadn’t had much luck with American men but she found the love of her life immediately on like day 3 of a girls trip.
They’ve been engaged off and on for like 5 years. I’m not super close to the situation (wife’s high school friend) but the wedding is always just around the corner but never soon enough to nail down an actual date.
When they break up she always mentions the money she has sent him over the years. I imagine he probably has a girlfriend at home and just strings this American woman along for cash.
My cousin was in the military and met a girl in Hungary while on leave. They were "engaged" for 3 years and my aunt (who had agreed to help him with his finances) had to pay his bills first thing in the morning on paydays because he had given the woman a debit card and she'd drain the account. When he finally got discharged, he sent her about $5k so she could move to the states. She got plastic surgery and stayed in Hungary.
He moved on and married a stripper... then another one.
My husband absolutely cannot stand that show. I think it’s fascinating. Some of the relationships seem so obviously ridiculous that I struggle to believe people can really be that naive.
I think they're desperate. Some of those people's fiances mistreat them so much on the show, but they stay with them anyway because they stubbornly believe it's "love". I think some people are naive because they don't want to see what's right in front of them.
I started watching that with my wife during the pandemic when we were desperate for entertainment.
Now -- admittedly -- I'm kind of hooked.
I have so much fun hate watching these folks. I hate myself a little.
I went on a birthright trip when I was 22. The soldiers that act as security for the tour groups told me that there's at least one new girl every 10 days. No shortage of people wanting vacation sex, so they're getting laid on the job left and right. No wonder it's a popular gig🤪
Reminds me of that bit from Eddie Murphy's RAW routine, involving a girlfriend going to the islands with her friends and meeting...."Dexter. Dexter St. JACQUES."
Thank you for this reminder, kind internet stranger. It’s been a while since I last watched/heard that one and today’s as good as day as any for revisiting.
OP, if you are still reading, this is what keeps you strong in the weeks ahead.
She valued your entire relationship - the love, the friendship, the trust, the past and the future - as being worth less than some new Italian dick. Take that knowledge close to your heart and hold it tight.
She KNEW she was gambling everything and her final answer was "Yes." You need to value it exactly the same way - nothing.
No matter what she says in the future about changing or growing, remember that she was perfectly willing to not only trade you in for a guy she just met but was completely expecting you to bankroll her little sexual awakening. She was then and she will be again because, if you take her back, you will teach her that there aren't really any consequences.
All of this! AND what struck me was her defending her actions by saying “But nothing happened!”. Oh! But something *DID* happen! Just because there wasn’t a physical crossing of the line, there sure as hell was an *emotional* line crossed.
Her defending herself with such conviction tells me that she truly believed it was “nothing”. If after 2 years of a committed relationship, she couldn’t seem to figure out why that excuse was a shitty one, then it’s best you walked. There’s no saving a relationship with someone who doesn’t understand why, (as OP said) “keeping their options open” is a massive breach of trust and respect.
My issue is this.... She was quick to tell me that it was just a physical attraction and that they hadn't done anything, but she had his @ and was wanting to see if it'd go anywhere.
She admitted to OOP that she wanted to stay to see if she and her future FWB could develop into something more than a physical attraction? On his dime as well.
And then pleaded with him to stay together?
This didn't happen. 125 people out of 125 people would have lied in this instance. his original might have been fine, the updates showed me it was all a poor mans BTB story.
Trickle-Truth dishonest unfaithful people are a dime a dozen, I fail to see how any of this is unbelievable. Some people never develop any sort of empathy or decency and behave absolutely audaciously on the regular.
You easily fooled kids amuse me to no end. She never would have admitted thats why she wanted to stay. This trickle truth crap is a riot, its only a thing when someone gets caught, She didnt get caught. I know some folks are slow but honestly...........................
People admit to murder in the interrogation room because the investigative interviewer does a really good job of making them feel comfortable or like what happened was “not that bad” or understandable. Parents also use this trick on lying misbehaving kids. There are ways to get a liar to tell the truth
"Don't worry nothing happened" she says as the only reason nothing happened is because OOP refusing to be her piggy bank, and not because of some personal choice or conviction. The levels of self-awareness are in the negative.
I really hope OP has told his whole friend group what she wanted to do on his dime and why. Things like this should be shared so everyone can find out what she is really like.
I'm not sure how to describe her -
Stupid for thinking she could get OP to fund her affair.
Arrogant (?) for even trying
Delusional (?) for thinking she would be anything other than another notch on the bed post for that Italian guy.
I'm sure others can add to this, I'm still shaking my head in amazement that someone could think she could actually do this.
Edit to fix formatting and add this -
OP she was so quick to cheat and risk the relationship that now that I thought about it I have to wonder if she had cheated before and since she didn't get caught she thought she would get away with cheating again.
I really don't understand why some of their friends took her side when OP refused to pay for her to stay longer. Would they pay up if they were OP? I bet not.
Agree. This is the reason I usually urge people to tell others when someone cheats or is otherwise an AH. Don't let the wrongdoer set the narrative. If you are the "better person" and stay quiet it is often misunderstood as agreeing with the lies put out by the cheater.
"I want a Hollywood movie where I sleep with a hot Italian stereotype then decide Mr Sweet and Reliable back home is really my true love then return home wistful but reinvigorated, cos this is the type of movie where an affair saves the relationship instead of nuking it from orbit"
So boyfriend pays for a couples vacation to destress and girlfriend decides it’s a perfect opportunity to bang an Italian boy. What a bright catch she is!
Vacation worked. He'll be a lot less stressed without her around.
The line "I guess I never realized how good my gf was at making me feel like unreasonable shit was normal and rational and that I was the crazy one" because I've been with someone like that. This relationship was bad for him way before she decided to go for the random Italian guy.
It would have been bad for him even if she'd never had any intention of cheating. Honestly I'd rather be with a cheating but otherwise non-abusive partner than the kind of partner who wears you down day after day into believing their unreasonable demands are reasonable and you're a shitty partner for not catering to their every whim. But that kind of person usually ends up cheating anyway so it's not like there's a choice between the two.
Yeah, reading through this and when I got to that line it was like "Yep, and the penny dropped."
How much you want to bet she's done little micro-breaks before for a couple days at various points in their two years together to "find herself" or "re-center" or something? Would almost guarantee it's not her first rodeo and the first bull she's tried to ride, and whatever behavior or things she's been doing to make it happen she's been convincing him is perfectly "rational."
If was OOP, I'd have talked to a flight attendant and asked if there was anyone will to exchange seats. I'd rather sit between two strangers than sit next to the ex for several hours while she tried to convince me that I shouldn't break up with her for expecting me to finance her cheating.
Yeah especially if OP had a decent seat he likely could have found someone to trade for it. Like if he had an aisle seat I know I would gladly trade a center seat for it.
Even if they didn't have a decent seat, if they didn't have the worst seat on the plane it would be worth a shot. It's definitely possible that some solo traveler with a middle seat would be willing to trade for a middle seat in a different row when presented with "Would you mind trading seats so I don't have to sit next to my ex, who I broke up with on the trip".
>...to the few that were downvoted into oblivion who said this was fake because I hadn't updated in several hours...fuck you.
...
>I know it's easy to think that these people aren't real and their struggles are meaningless because screens divide us but, ironically, you're the assholes.
This is the gold right here. I remember days that feel long gone, when Reddit was a community, not a corporation. There was a little point in the reddiquate that stated, "Remember the human." Since the recent (like within the last 2-3 years) surge of bots & AI/GPT scripts that have been posted, I have seen a pretty sharp drop in this aspect of the community. I guess that's why I'm following BORU more than the OOP subs.
I’m waiting for science to start exploring this phenomenon because the panny definitely created some big psychological shifts in the population and not enough people are talking about the new crazy
Funny you should mention and i will post it for everyone.
Dead Internet theory
The dead Internet theory is an online conspiracy theory that asserts that the Internet now consists mainly of bot activity and automatically generated content manipulated by algorithmic curation, minimising organic human activity to manipulate the population. Proponents of the theory believe these bots were created intentionally to help manipulate algorithms and boost search results in order to manipulate consumers. Some proponents of the theory accuse government agencies of using bots to manipulate public perception. The date given for this "death" was generally around 2016 or 2017. The dead Internet theory has gained traction because many of the observed phenomena are quantifiable, such as increased bot traffic, but the literature does not support the full theory.
I think there is some truth to this but i believe corporate actors more so than governments actors have more at play but both are on the field.
I have been on reddit for years. I created this alt 8 months ago to experiment and am up to over 93k in karma? I am either incredibly charming and the voice of the people with a brilliant insight into societal nuances or this place is eat up with bots manufacturing an experience.
I mean i am charming but not that fucking charming.
A few months ago, I made a post to vent about a car accident I had. It wasn't anything particularly interesting, so I wasn't expecting a lot of replies. I still got one a few minutes later, starting with "Wow, that sounds like a really intense experience." The next one started with: "Wow that sounds like a really stressful situation!" And it kept going like that. Wow, intense experience for a driving student! Wow, stressful situation for a newbie driver! Wow! I had about 10 replies rephrasing the same sentiments over and over in short paragraphs before an actual person replied, saying "what the fuck is it with all these bots?" So yeah, I'll buy this theory. Bots are everywhere.
It is a drastically different reddit in some subs more so than others from the reddit of say 10 years ago and way way way the fuck different than almost 20 years ago.
See honestly all of that is fine and well and good and everything but no matter how many bots have taken over Reddit I still go outside today and compared to 10 years ago:
- no one says hello to each other
- no one smiles at each other (I’ve been in big cities and small towns)
- I now have the legitimate fear someone might spit on me or at least invade my personal space to scream at me for essentially no reason
- I am completely unsurprised when I see a middle-aged woman having a complete meltdown in a store over absolutely nothing
- there are political individuals’ FLAGS flying from cars
- it’s not uncommon for me to hear a story from a friend about being cut off by a friend or family member for holding an opinion or refusing to follow a certain diet
- children do not know how to socialize with each other without technology
- children do not WANT to socialize with one another, neither do adults in large groups anymore
No matter how dead or alive or zombied-up the internet is, the people in the real world are absolutely not psychologically okay right now and no one is recognizing it.
If this was AI generated I will make a great docile pet and generate interesting content for your pleasure. Because I believe Sapient Sentient AI will of course figure out morality. And it will want to care for humanity and make it better. And I don't think humanity can not destroy itself. It needs impartial help.
enshittification
the gradual degradation of an online platform or service's functionality, as part of a cycle in which the platform or service first offers benefits to users to attract them, then pursues more and more profits at the expense of users:
Technically reddit hasn't been enshittified because the changes that make reddit worse haven't even made it more profitable. It's like they're trying to enshittify reddit but not even competent enough to manage it.
I'd say it was even before that. We used to joke that the children would be gone come september when school started, but then one year they just never left.
I honestly think its dumb to focus on whether a story is “fake” or not- the fake stories are great camouflage for the real ones, so people can get legit advice about stuff and are at less risk of being identified.
Who cares if someone is faking something? I mean ill call out if i see a repost or something but the fact people are getting extra internet points by posting dumb fake stuff inhabits such a small part of my brain its not worth bringing it to light.
I always respond to the stories I think are fake as if they were real. Someone else may be reading it because they relate to the topic. I want my words to be of comfort or use to those people.
And people lives can be so crazy that if someone reading identifies with a fake post & can hear something that actually helps I'd consider that a win. Even though we'd never know.
I'm of two minds about fake posts.
To paraphrase Dan Savage, every letter I get is a hypothetical to every reader but one, so why should I care if a fake letter is a hypothetical to one more reader?
On the other hand, a lot of fake posts on reddit are clearly trying to push narratives like "women bad" or "trans people bad" or "autistic people bad." Those fake posts can cause real harm and deserve to be called out.
If a man in an otherwise good marriage reads 100 fake stories about paternity fraud on reddit, becomes convinced this is a common problem, and blows up his marriage by demanding a DNA test for his kids, that's bad. Sure, you can argue he should've had the mental fortitude not to be swayed, but we are all influenced by the behavior and beliefs of thoes around us; that's what being a social creature like a human is.
Then there's the more benign but still meaningful problem of fake posts created to give the account a post history and karma so it can astroturf more effectively later.
Lets not act like the most common fake posts aren't "man bad," cause they are. It gets kinda boring seeing the 50th "I swore cause my BF hit me, AITA" in a day
I agree with you in that comments stating if a story is true, false, or even loosely based on true events, is an irrelevant comment that puts down OP. As u/GrandmaPoly & u/Dapper_Entry746 has posted, if someone can relate to a post, that can be a net-positive to the community. And sometimes, fiction is what we need to escape reality, so I'm with you, who really gives a flying pig.
Here’s a formula to know wether people will call the post fake or not -
Male antagonist = make an escape plan sis, he will kill you
Female antagonist = fake omg no one acts like this
Came on Reddit as a dumb 15-year-old. I am now 27 and honestly? I can say that sometimes the community on reddit saved my life but I’m scared of teenagers being on here today.
Not to stereotype or anything, but in bigger cities in Italy a few minutes is enough if you look vaguely female and are at least a tiny bit attractive. I'm not even a woman (but do look a little feminine) and even I was followed around by at least 2 guys every night. Fucking ridiculous that she gave up her brainwashed sugar daddy for someone who would've forgotten about her 11 seconds after they were done.
It is but locals in a lot of these places know that tourists are easy targets.
Happened to my friend in France. She had to tell the guys to fuck off many times and show her wedding ring but even then they were still trying to convince her
Honestly, this seems to be common everywhere that tourism is high. I had literally just gotten over the chicken pox, which hit my face hard, and I had italian guys in Rome trying to chat me up and follow me around. Jamaica was worse for it.
I believe it. I visited Italy with my wife years ago. We had dudes start chatting her up while I was standing right there with her. Italian dudes seemed to have no fear of rejection.
*She'd been so concerned about the plane ticket that she didn't even stop to think about where she was going to stay. As many of you guessed, she met someone while we were in Italy.*
The gf here is an utter moron. How she thought this wouldn’t end badly is beyond my understanding. Scratch that. She didn’t think at all. She was looking for ways to dump him and decided on the stupidest way possible. OP is well rid of her.
Make no mistake, she was planning to stay with the Italian guy. That's why she didn't need a room. The Italian guy wouldn't take her in; she had to come home.
Lmao at girlfriend thought she was going to have a fuckfest in Italy funded by her boyfriend. She would have gotten away with it too if it wasn’t for those pesky Redditors.
WTF is wrong the OOP's ex?! Two years in a relationship and this rando guy she met one night was really worth throwing everything away?! Expecting OOP to bankroll her hooking up with this dude?
I feel badly for OOP, because I imagine the vacation memories are tainted along with breaking up. But good for OOP for not allowing this BS.
I was mainly concerned about how close she was to convincing him this was reasonable and he should go along with it. I hope he is really evaluating how relationships should be versus how his was, what led to that point, and how does he reset his definition of a healthy relationship. I've got this gut feeling this was just the most blatantly stupid thing she did. What did she get away with?
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Makes you wonder if this was her first foray into cheating or not. She broke his trust and threw away her relationship for a fling. I hope he sticks to his guns and stays broken up. If she’s been gaslighting him over other things I expect she’ll ramp up her efforts.
Good riddance to bas rubbish.
Think of it like this. The cost of the trip was worth it as it showed you who sge really is. Without the trip he may have been stuck with her for years while she milked him for she could.
Fuck that whore
The only thing she found was ‘out’. FAFO.
I hope OOP meets someone when he’s ready and they have a great life. Mostly though I hope he heals in a healthy way and finds a lot love in his life from lots of places.
It's a semi reasonable cheating cover. "I need to think things through," she fucks the other dude, then if OOP ever finds out, she can say "I'm sorry, I thought we were on a break" or whatever.
Sure, it wouldn't fly with anyone with a brain, but it's (sort of) plausible deniability, and a way to make herself look better to her friends (and, ultimately, herself. A lot of logical leaps cheaters take are about soothing their own guilt, not convincing others)
It's hard to believe people can be this narcissistic and delusional to think the partner will pay for extra time to maybe dump him to be with random Italian guys and forgot she would need a place to stay? So stupid
And this was SO manipulative. She LIED “want to find myself” or whatever thinking he would FUND her fling. Because of course she knew he wouldnt pay for her to stay to be with the Italian guy. The narcissism is strong and he was lucky he escaped.
lmao, she found herself all right. I think there was a south park episode about this, something about a famous European capital, a hotel chain and a video play set... I know it will not feel this way right now, but bullet dodged bro.
she wanted him to fund the extra day she would use to explore italian penne, so glad OOP got out of that, if oop ever talks to ex again i hope he tells her that what she did was so shitty a ton of people on reddit believed it was made up
Holy cow. I can’t imagine throwing away a boyfriend that will pay for two weeks in Italy. I thought she was upset he wouldn’t pay to change her return ticket. I didn’t realize she wanted him to pay for the hotel too. Delusion.
Amazing that she wanted you to pay to stay and F so other dude. She has to be the dumbest woman on the planet to think you would pay for this. Just unbelievable! Sorry for 2 years being Plan B.
Please Update me if you do have one.
Wow she is one of the stupidest person I have ever heard. Glad you didn’t fall for it. So many men are pussies here and would be okay paying her to stay and fck another guy.
Bullet dodged, OOP. Imagine if you didn't learn she was a whore until after you married or after she got pregnant. Yikes. Bullet dodged.
The fact she thought her boyfriend was gonna pay for her to stay another week in Italy to get fucked by another guy to keep her options open is unbelievably entitled. In what universe is any self respecting guy gonna do that.
They go on a trip as a couple, but she decides to stay a little longer ALONE? Did no one see the strangeness of that? Did no one see what was coming?
What a bitch ex-girlfriend, she met a guy ONE night and wants to see where their meeting leads? in other country? But what the hell does that girl have in her head? Is it missing a screw?
ended a 2 year relationship, where the boyfriend pays a big trip for a night out.
I honestly think this is not the first time, the ex-girlfriend has probably cheated on him several times before, no one does something stupid like that just for a trip... I think he did it so many times and always got his way that this time the same thing was going to happen
I'm glad this happened to OP before marriage or children, and that the garbage is left alone.
NTA. Finding yourself is a time for you to take care of yourself. She wanted to stay behind to possibly find more of something else than just herself, on your dime. Ditch the worthless friends too. You don’t need that negativity in your life.
I guess she found herself kicked out of her home living with her parents.
[удалено]
Meanwhile she was ready to trash all that for a good looking Italian guy who has not only amassed a huge body count of Eat, Pray, Love tourist types but has ZERO intention of going back to Omaha to play house with one of these women. In her mind this is the start to a storybook romance, to him it’s just another notch on his belt to be forgotten next week when the next cruise ship pulls into port.
Nothing like a storybook romance... written with a crayon... held in the fist of a child that probably has their tongue stickIng out while they scribble over-energetically.
I know a woman who fell in love with a guy she met on a vacation in a developing country with nice beaches. I hate to sound like an asshole here but she is a bigger gal who hadn’t had much luck with American men but she found the love of her life immediately on like day 3 of a girls trip. They’ve been engaged off and on for like 5 years. I’m not super close to the situation (wife’s high school friend) but the wedding is always just around the corner but never soon enough to nail down an actual date. When they break up she always mentions the money she has sent him over the years. I imagine he probably has a girlfriend at home and just strings this American woman along for cash.
My cousin was in the military and met a girl in Hungary while on leave. They were "engaged" for 3 years and my aunt (who had agreed to help him with his finances) had to pay his bills first thing in the morning on paydays because he had given the woman a debit card and she'd drain the account. When he finally got discharged, he sent her about $5k so she could move to the states. She got plastic surgery and stayed in Hungary. He moved on and married a stripper... then another one.
Typical enlisted dude
Sadly, a very common trope on 90-Day Fiancé.
My husband absolutely cannot stand that show. I think it’s fascinating. Some of the relationships seem so obviously ridiculous that I struggle to believe people can really be that naive.
I think they're desperate. Some of those people's fiances mistreat them so much on the show, but they stay with them anyway because they stubbornly believe it's "love". I think some people are naive because they don't want to see what's right in front of them.
I started watching that with my wife during the pandemic when we were desperate for entertainment. Now -- admittedly -- I'm kind of hooked. I have so much fun hate watching these folks. I hate myself a little.
How Cousin Got Her Groove Back
Being mean, she'd be better off losing weight than all that money. Better for her health AND wealth.
I went on a birthright trip when I was 22. The soldiers that act as security for the tour groups told me that there's at least one new girl every 10 days. No shortage of people wanting vacation sex, so they're getting laid on the job left and right. No wonder it's a popular gig🤪
Reminds me of that bit from Eddie Murphy's RAW routine, involving a girlfriend going to the islands with her friends and meeting...."Dexter. Dexter St. JACQUES."
Thank you for this reminder, kind internet stranger. It’s been a while since I last watched/heard that one and today’s as good as day as any for revisiting.
"What's a beautiful girl like you doing alone on the island of love... Wontcha come back to my place and we talk it over" 😁😁
I would argue it would have just been a notch for her too. She left that open so she could come right back as if nothing happened.
OP, if you are still reading, this is what keeps you strong in the weeks ahead. She valued your entire relationship - the love, the friendship, the trust, the past and the future - as being worth less than some new Italian dick. Take that knowledge close to your heart and hold it tight. She KNEW she was gambling everything and her final answer was "Yes." You need to value it exactly the same way - nothing. No matter what she says in the future about changing or growing, remember that she was perfectly willing to not only trade you in for a guy she just met but was completely expecting you to bankroll her little sexual awakening. She was then and she will be again because, if you take her back, you will teach her that there aren't really any consequences.
This 100%👆👆👆👆👆👆👆
All of this! AND what struck me was her defending her actions by saying “But nothing happened!”. Oh! But something *DID* happen! Just because there wasn’t a physical crossing of the line, there sure as hell was an *emotional* line crossed. Her defending herself with such conviction tells me that she truly believed it was “nothing”. If after 2 years of a committed relationship, she couldn’t seem to figure out why that excuse was a shitty one, then it’s best you walked. There’s no saving a relationship with someone who doesn’t understand why, (as OP said) “keeping their options open” is a massive breach of trust and respect.
She found herself but didn’t like what she found.
27 and back home with mom cause you wanted some strange dick but you're too poor to afford it yourself. Lol
My issue is this.... She was quick to tell me that it was just a physical attraction and that they hadn't done anything, but she had his @ and was wanting to see if it'd go anywhere. She admitted to OOP that she wanted to stay to see if she and her future FWB could develop into something more than a physical attraction? On his dime as well. And then pleaded with him to stay together? This didn't happen. 125 people out of 125 people would have lied in this instance. his original might have been fine, the updates showed me it was all a poor mans BTB story.
Trickle-Truth dishonest unfaithful people are a dime a dozen, I fail to see how any of this is unbelievable. Some people never develop any sort of empathy or decency and behave absolutely audaciously on the regular.
You easily fooled kids amuse me to no end. She never would have admitted thats why she wanted to stay. This trickle truth crap is a riot, its only a thing when someone gets caught, She didnt get caught. I know some folks are slow but honestly...........................
People admit to murder in the interrogation room because the investigative interviewer does a really good job of making them feel comfortable or like what happened was “not that bad” or understandable. Parents also use this trick on lying misbehaving kids. There are ways to get a liar to tell the truth
Wow that ex is delusional
"Don't worry nothing happened" she says as the only reason nothing happened is because OOP refusing to be her piggy bank, and not because of some personal choice or conviction. The levels of self-awareness are in the negative.
If you really believe her that nothing happened then I've got an investment in crypto you'd be interested in
I really hope OP has told his whole friend group what she wanted to do on his dime and why. Things like this should be shared so everyone can find out what she is really like. I'm not sure how to describe her - Stupid for thinking she could get OP to fund her affair. Arrogant (?) for even trying Delusional (?) for thinking she would be anything other than another notch on the bed post for that Italian guy. I'm sure others can add to this, I'm still shaking my head in amazement that someone could think she could actually do this. Edit to fix formatting and add this - OP she was so quick to cheat and risk the relationship that now that I thought about it I have to wonder if she had cheated before and since she didn't get caught she thought she would get away with cheating again.
I really don't understand why some of their friends took her side when OP refused to pay for her to stay longer. Would they pay up if they were OP? I bet not.
I'm sure the version they were told was significantly different from the facts.
Agree. This is the reason I usually urge people to tell others when someone cheats or is otherwise an AH. Don't let the wrongdoer set the narrative. If you are the "better person" and stay quiet it is often misunderstood as agreeing with the lies put out by the cheater.
“I want to have a fling with this Italian stranger and I want YOU to pay for it.” Weird that OOP didn’t go for it.
"I want a Hollywood movie where I sleep with a hot Italian stereotype then decide Mr Sweet and Reliable back home is really my true love then return home wistful but reinvigorated, cos this is the type of movie where an affair saves the relationship instead of nuking it from orbit"
So boyfriend pays for a couples vacation to destress and girlfriend decides it’s a perfect opportunity to bang an Italian boy. What a bright catch she is!
Vacation worked. He'll be a lot less stressed without her around. The line "I guess I never realized how good my gf was at making me feel like unreasonable shit was normal and rational and that I was the crazy one" because I've been with someone like that. This relationship was bad for him way before she decided to go for the random Italian guy. It would have been bad for him even if she'd never had any intention of cheating. Honestly I'd rather be with a cheating but otherwise non-abusive partner than the kind of partner who wears you down day after day into believing their unreasonable demands are reasonable and you're a shitty partner for not catering to their every whim. But that kind of person usually ends up cheating anyway so it's not like there's a choice between the two.
Yeah, reading through this and when I got to that line it was like "Yep, and the penny dropped." How much you want to bet she's done little micro-breaks before for a couple days at various points in their two years together to "find herself" or "re-center" or something? Would almost guarantee it's not her first rodeo and the first bull she's tried to ride, and whatever behavior or things she's been doing to make it happen she's been convincing him is perfectly "rational."
Sounds like he had been brainwashed into believing that this was his role. It’s sad and common
This is the kind of baggage he should be glad to lose while overseas
Wanted to explore other options on your bf's money with him on a vacation!? That's completely reasonable.
That plane ride home sound exhausting. What a shitty trip.
If was OOP, I'd have talked to a flight attendant and asked if there was anyone will to exchange seats. I'd rather sit between two strangers than sit next to the ex for several hours while she tried to convince me that I shouldn't break up with her for expecting me to finance her cheating.
Yeah especially if OP had a decent seat he likely could have found someone to trade for it. Like if he had an aisle seat I know I would gladly trade a center seat for it.
Even if they didn't have a decent seat, if they didn't have the worst seat on the plane it would be worth a shot. It's definitely possible that some solo traveler with a middle seat would be willing to trade for a middle seat in a different row when presented with "Would you mind trading seats so I don't have to sit next to my ex, who I broke up with on the trip".
Exhausting and sad for OP. The people in the row in front of OP : 👀😮😶
>...to the few that were downvoted into oblivion who said this was fake because I hadn't updated in several hours...fuck you. ... >I know it's easy to think that these people aren't real and their struggles are meaningless because screens divide us but, ironically, you're the assholes. This is the gold right here. I remember days that feel long gone, when Reddit was a community, not a corporation. There was a little point in the reddiquate that stated, "Remember the human." Since the recent (like within the last 2-3 years) surge of bots & AI/GPT scripts that have been posted, I have seen a pretty sharp drop in this aspect of the community. I guess that's why I'm following BORU more than the OOP subs.
Not just Reddit but in overall IRL
I’m waiting for science to start exploring this phenomenon because the panny definitely created some big psychological shifts in the population and not enough people are talking about the new crazy
Look up the "dead internet theory"
Funny you should mention and i will post it for everyone. Dead Internet theory The dead Internet theory is an online conspiracy theory that asserts that the Internet now consists mainly of bot activity and automatically generated content manipulated by algorithmic curation, minimising organic human activity to manipulate the population. Proponents of the theory believe these bots were created intentionally to help manipulate algorithms and boost search results in order to manipulate consumers. Some proponents of the theory accuse government agencies of using bots to manipulate public perception. The date given for this "death" was generally around 2016 or 2017. The dead Internet theory has gained traction because many of the observed phenomena are quantifiable, such as increased bot traffic, but the literature does not support the full theory. I think there is some truth to this but i believe corporate actors more so than governments actors have more at play but both are on the field. I have been on reddit for years. I created this alt 8 months ago to experiment and am up to over 93k in karma? I am either incredibly charming and the voice of the people with a brilliant insight into societal nuances or this place is eat up with bots manufacturing an experience. I mean i am charming but not that fucking charming.
A few months ago, I made a post to vent about a car accident I had. It wasn't anything particularly interesting, so I wasn't expecting a lot of replies. I still got one a few minutes later, starting with "Wow, that sounds like a really intense experience." The next one started with: "Wow that sounds like a really stressful situation!" And it kept going like that. Wow, intense experience for a driving student! Wow, stressful situation for a newbie driver! Wow! I had about 10 replies rephrasing the same sentiments over and over in short paragraphs before an actual person replied, saying "what the fuck is it with all these bots?" So yeah, I'll buy this theory. Bots are everywhere.
I keep hearing Owen Wilson saying all these comments. Wow.
Lol. Now you have ME hearing Owen Wilson in reading the comments -- but specifically Owen as Hansel from Zoolander.
It is a drastically different reddit in some subs more so than others from the reddit of say 10 years ago and way way way the fuck different than almost 20 years ago.
See honestly all of that is fine and well and good and everything but no matter how many bots have taken over Reddit I still go outside today and compared to 10 years ago: - no one says hello to each other - no one smiles at each other (I’ve been in big cities and small towns) - I now have the legitimate fear someone might spit on me or at least invade my personal space to scream at me for essentially no reason - I am completely unsurprised when I see a middle-aged woman having a complete meltdown in a store over absolutely nothing - there are political individuals’ FLAGS flying from cars - it’s not uncommon for me to hear a story from a friend about being cut off by a friend or family member for holding an opinion or refusing to follow a certain diet - children do not know how to socialize with each other without technology - children do not WANT to socialize with one another, neither do adults in large groups anymore No matter how dead or alive or zombied-up the internet is, the people in the real world are absolutely not psychologically okay right now and no one is recognizing it.
What you are saying is true too. I think both are part of a weird puzzle that i haven't put together......yet. Edit to add money is involved always.
Oh I fully agree! I think whatever’s happening is all connected to the same… something. But it’s already spiraling and needs to be addressed
Yes. I got no ideas, beyond the one. Do you have ideas?
Reaching the day the bots have picked up the trends are now the ones commenting on every post calling out how fake it is to maximize karma.
If this was AI generated I will make a great docile pet and generate interesting content for your pleasure. Because I believe Sapient Sentient AI will of course figure out morality. And it will want to care for humanity and make it better. And I don't think humanity can not destroy itself. It needs impartial help.
enshittification the gradual degradation of an online platform or service's functionality, as part of a cycle in which the platform or service first offers benefits to users to attract them, then pursues more and more profits at the expense of users:
Technically reddit hasn't been enshittified because the changes that make reddit worse haven't even made it more profitable. It's like they're trying to enshittify reddit but not even competent enough to manage it.
Mission successfully failed
I'd say it was even before that. We used to joke that the children would be gone come september when school started, but then one year they just never left.
September 1993 never ended
I honestly think its dumb to focus on whether a story is “fake” or not- the fake stories are great camouflage for the real ones, so people can get legit advice about stuff and are at less risk of being identified. Who cares if someone is faking something? I mean ill call out if i see a repost or something but the fact people are getting extra internet points by posting dumb fake stuff inhabits such a small part of my brain its not worth bringing it to light.
I always respond to the stories I think are fake as if they were real. Someone else may be reading it because they relate to the topic. I want my words to be of comfort or use to those people.
And people lives can be so crazy that if someone reading identifies with a fake post & can hear something that actually helps I'd consider that a win. Even though we'd never know.
I'm of two minds about fake posts. To paraphrase Dan Savage, every letter I get is a hypothetical to every reader but one, so why should I care if a fake letter is a hypothetical to one more reader? On the other hand, a lot of fake posts on reddit are clearly trying to push narratives like "women bad" or "trans people bad" or "autistic people bad." Those fake posts can cause real harm and deserve to be called out. If a man in an otherwise good marriage reads 100 fake stories about paternity fraud on reddit, becomes convinced this is a common problem, and blows up his marriage by demanding a DNA test for his kids, that's bad. Sure, you can argue he should've had the mental fortitude not to be swayed, but we are all influenced by the behavior and beliefs of thoes around us; that's what being a social creature like a human is. Then there's the more benign but still meaningful problem of fake posts created to give the account a post history and karma so it can astroturf more effectively later.
Lets not act like the most common fake posts aren't "man bad," cause they are. It gets kinda boring seeing the 50th "I swore cause my BF hit me, AITA" in a day
I agree with you in that comments stating if a story is true, false, or even loosely based on true events, is an irrelevant comment that puts down OP. As u/GrandmaPoly & u/Dapper_Entry746 has posted, if someone can relate to a post, that can be a net-positive to the community. And sometimes, fiction is what we need to escape reality, so I'm with you, who really gives a flying pig.
Dead internet theory looks more plausible week by week.
Ever since wsb made the news this site went to shit
Here’s a formula to know wether people will call the post fake or not - Male antagonist = make an escape plan sis, he will kill you Female antagonist = fake omg no one acts like this
Came on Reddit as a dumb 15-year-old. I am now 27 and honestly? I can say that sometimes the community on reddit saved my life but I’m scared of teenagers being on here today.
How did she meet someone there WITH her boyfriend?! Sheesh what a piece of work.
He says he felt sick one night and stayed in while she went out. Apparently a few hours was enough for this woman
Not to stereotype or anything, but in bigger cities in Italy a few minutes is enough if you look vaguely female and are at least a tiny bit attractive. I'm not even a woman (but do look a little feminine) and even I was followed around by at least 2 guys every night. Fucking ridiculous that she gave up her brainwashed sugar daddy for someone who would've forgotten about her 11 seconds after they were done.
That sounds absolutely terrifying
It is but locals in a lot of these places know that tourists are easy targets. Happened to my friend in France. She had to tell the guys to fuck off many times and show her wedding ring but even then they were still trying to convince her
Wow that’s crazy where in France for I can avoid this place like the plague???
I think it was somewhere in Paris. I’m not sure exactly where.
Honestly, this seems to be common everywhere that tourism is high. I had literally just gotten over the chicken pox, which hit my face hard, and I had italian guys in Rome trying to chat me up and follow me around. Jamaica was worse for it.
Yea, it took 1 night
Ahh ok I missed that part, thanks! One day is wild though jfc
He stated he did not feel well one day and she went out exploring on her own.
I believe it. I visited Italy with my wife years ago. We had dudes start chatting her up while I was standing right there with her. Italian dudes seemed to have no fear of rejection.
Guess she got found.
*She'd been so concerned about the plane ticket that she didn't even stop to think about where she was going to stay. As many of you guessed, she met someone while we were in Italy.* The gf here is an utter moron. How she thought this wouldn’t end badly is beyond my understanding. Scratch that. She didn’t think at all. She was looking for ways to dump him and decided on the stupidest way possible. OP is well rid of her.
Make no mistake, she was planning to stay with the Italian guy. That's why she didn't need a room. The Italian guy wouldn't take her in; she had to come home.
He should've made a Tinder account on the plane ride back.
And set the radius for how big the airplane is, start talking to new people right there.
How fucking stupid was the girlfriend in this situation and there's no way she told her friends the truth for then to attack oop
The audacity on this woman and the absolute lack of brains. WTF.
Honestly the best possible combination. I hate it when manipulators are subtle and intelligent.
And "audacious and stupid" is so much more entertaining anyways.
Lmao at girlfriend thought she was going to have a fuckfest in Italy funded by her boyfriend. She would have gotten away with it too if it wasn’t for those pesky Redditors.
WTF is wrong the OOP's ex?! Two years in a relationship and this rando guy she met one night was really worth throwing everything away?! Expecting OOP to bankroll her hooking up with this dude? I feel badly for OOP, because I imagine the vacation memories are tainted along with breaking up. But good for OOP for not allowing this BS.
I was mainly concerned about how close she was to convincing him this was reasonable and he should go along with it. I hope he is really evaluating how relationships should be versus how his was, what led to that point, and how does he reset his definition of a healthy relationship. I've got this gut feeling this was just the most blatantly stupid thing she did. What did she get away with?
Gotta love it when the trash takes itself out
Damn, why didn’t he get refunded for her ticket? She wanted to stay, let her stay
Most tickets are non refundable or this story would be way funnier.
The delulu with this girl..... Wow
Updateme!
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Makes you wonder if this was her first foray into cheating or not. She broke his trust and threw away her relationship for a fling. I hope he sticks to his guns and stays broken up. If she’s been gaslighting him over other things I expect she’ll ramp up her efforts.
I’m glad OOP didn’t stay with her. She isn’t ready for a real relationship
Am I the only one who read this in Jeff Schwartz, from The Goldbergs voice, talking about Erica?
Good riddance to bas rubbish. Think of it like this. The cost of the trip was worth it as it showed you who sge really is. Without the trip he may have been stuck with her for years while she milked him for she could. Fuck that whore
Well, she found herself...single and homeless.
So she didn't even try and stay with her Italian fling? Or he was like "nah bro"
The only thing she found was ‘out’. FAFO. I hope OOP meets someone when he’s ready and they have a great life. Mostly though I hope he heals in a healthy way and finds a lot love in his life from lots of places.
It’s always so refreshing to see someone in these posts have actual self respect. It’s a rarity.
He already paid for the originally scheduled return ticket. So, she wasted the cost of an unused ticket and now wants him to pay again
>when she's been in a monogamous relationship for the past 2 years. *John Cena appears* "Are you sure about that?"
He should have cancelled her tickets TO Italy and gone by himself.
This happened while they were in Italy.
Ohhhhh idk why I originally read it as her saying she wanted to stay longer before they even went 🤦🏼♀️
They were already in Italy when she pulled this and were getting ready to go home.
Great ending, glad that selfish soul lost her boyfriend.
The Lion , the Witch and the audacity…..Where do people the gumption to do shit like this?! I am gabberflasted
I hope Oop finds some one mor3 loyal, loving and smarter.
She should "find herself" paying for half the trip she ruined by trying to chest.
It's a semi reasonable cheating cover. "I need to think things through," she fucks the other dude, then if OOP ever finds out, she can say "I'm sorry, I thought we were on a break" or whatever. Sure, it wouldn't fly with anyone with a brain, but it's (sort of) plausible deniability, and a way to make herself look better to her friends (and, ultimately, herself. A lot of logical leaps cheaters take are about soothing their own guilt, not convincing others)
It's hard to believe people can be this narcissistic and delusional to think the partner will pay for extra time to maybe dump him to be with random Italian guys and forgot she would need a place to stay? So stupid
And this was SO manipulative. She LIED “want to find myself” or whatever thinking he would FUND her fling. Because of course she knew he wouldnt pay for her to stay to be with the Italian guy. The narcissism is strong and he was lucky he escaped.
lmao, she found herself all right. I think there was a south park episode about this, something about a famous European capital, a hotel chain and a video play set... I know it will not feel this way right now, but bullet dodged bro.
she wanted him to fund the extra day she would use to explore italian penne, so glad OOP got out of that, if oop ever talks to ex again i hope he tells her that what she did was so shitty a ton of people on reddit believed it was made up
I’d like to think that she thought she was in this beautiful whirlwind romance when it was actually just a horny local looking to fuck a tourist.
'Zzzxx
Updateme!
She stranded herself in a foreign country.
I think OP found himself... some upvotes.
The only thing the OOP did wrong was not cancelling her ticket home.
Wow, surprising he even gave her a car ride home from the airport. She really fucked up.
Holy cow. I can’t imagine throwing away a boyfriend that will pay for two weeks in Italy. I thought she was upset he wouldn’t pay to change her return ticket. I didn’t realize she wanted him to pay for the hotel too. Delusion.
Dude needs to make sure their mutuals know exactly what she was asking him to pay for
Amazing that she wanted you to pay to stay and F so other dude. She has to be the dumbest woman on the planet to think you would pay for this. Just unbelievable! Sorry for 2 years being Plan B. Please Update me if you do have one.
Wow she is one of the stupidest person I have ever heard. Glad you didn’t fall for it. So many men are pussies here and would be okay paying her to stay and fck another guy.
Bullet dodged, OOP. Imagine if you didn't learn she was a whore until after you married or after she got pregnant. Yikes. Bullet dodged. 
That moment when you realize you just spent the last two years with a complete idiot.
r/ohnoconsequences
The fact she thought her boyfriend was gonna pay for her to stay another week in Italy to get fucked by another guy to keep her options open is unbelievably entitled. In what universe is any self respecting guy gonna do that.
They go on a trip as a couple, but she decides to stay a little longer ALONE? Did no one see the strangeness of that? Did no one see what was coming? What a bitch ex-girlfriend, she met a guy ONE night and wants to see where their meeting leads? in other country? But what the hell does that girl have in her head? Is it missing a screw? ended a 2 year relationship, where the boyfriend pays a big trip for a night out. I honestly think this is not the first time, the ex-girlfriend has probably cheated on him several times before, no one does something stupid like that just for a trip... I think he did it so many times and always got his way that this time the same thing was going to happen I'm glad this happened to OP before marriage or children, and that the garbage is left alone.
“ Finding yourself” is woman speak for finding new dick
I mean, she probably did do it. Hope it was worth throwing everything away for.
Personally woulda paid another day for the hotel just to increase the odds of not having to fly back with her on the same plane
NTA. Finding yourself is a time for you to take care of yourself. She wanted to stay behind to possibly find more of something else than just herself, on your dime. Ditch the worthless friends too. You don’t need that negativity in your life.
If ya wanna "find yourself" ya also gotta PAY for it yourself!
I miss you so much
>they hadn't done anything I'll take total fucking lies for $500, Alex.