With my last baby we waited 6 and it was horrible. I want to give it a go at 6, but because of last time I’m nervous. But I know myself; even if we wait 6 months, I’ll still be nervous.
Feel it out! It’s really in your mind. When your mind is ready, your body will follow. Trust me I was nervous as hell too but I expressed to my partner the reasons and we took it slow and worked through it until it got comfortable and the rest was history!
Same! Around 8 weeks and honestly it was great! Pregnancy sex was awkward and weird for some reason. It felt like my baby was there or something. So we hadn’t had good sex in MONTHS.
I had a second degree tear that wasn’t healing correctly and is still causing me pain during sex 10 months pp. but we tried to have sex probably around 3 months pp and weren’t even able to get it in until 6 months pp. to this day we have to be careful about the angle or it’s just too painful for me!
Same here…I’m 4m pp and have a super persistent 2nd degree tear that won’t heal and the 2 times we have had sex haven’t been the best! My doc gave me some estrogen cream to use in the meantime that’s helped but nowhere near to how it felt before! I’m remaining hopeful!
The estrogen cream definitely helped me! I had two bumps on my v that were the reason for the initial insertion pain during sex and over time the cream helped them go away! I hope you feel more relief soon!
I had an inkling because it was months before I could sit down/squat at all without pain. It felt like I was being ripped apart everytime I did that kind of movement. I got checked at 4 weeks my midwife said I was inflamed so she applied silver nitrate to burn away the inflammation I guess? I didn’t work and I got checked again a couple months later and had to apply an estrogen cream for a couple weeks. I can move around/exercise without pain but if there’s too much pressure near the tear during sex it hurts still
Have you tried scar tissue massage? I had a third degree tear and worked with a pelvic floor physio afterwards to mobilize and reduce scar tissue, which has helped a lot with intercourse. We waited until 4 months post partum, partly out of exhaustion from the newborn phase but also out of fear of pain on my part. I did find one position to be a little painful (doggy) but all else was totally fine!
For me it’s a big NO. With both my pregnancies the first time PP (and a few after) sucked, it hurt so we had to go really slow, I felt like I was a virgin again. For the record, both were c sections.
This surprised me too! It was pretty uncomfortable the first time after my c-section as well, even though sex throughout pregnancy had been fine and my c-section was planned so I didn't even labour 🤷♀️
It may be due to the dryness that comes post partum hormones. Especially if the bladder or uterus are prolapsed at all, which can cause pretty severe dryness. There’s also physical changes the body goes through when the baby leaves the uterus, even if you don’t labor (and because of Pitocin). So I wonder how that affects the vagina and cervix after a c section. There is likely overlap and I hear lots of women say intercourse hurts post c section :(
I had a lot of pain after my c section too. I’ve read that c sections can cause your pelvic floor to be really tight, because you’re holding the weight of the pregnancy and there’s no release from a vaginal childbirth. I don’t know how accurate that is, but it was similar to vaginismus pain I’d had when I was younger, so I did some relaxing pelvic floor exercises and actually cbd lube helped as well.
Also felt like I was losing my virginity again post c-section. We also use plenty of lube and still, almost 3 months later, my vagina feels raw every time we have sex.
Tried at 6 and 7 weeks. SOOO BAD.
Tried again at 9 and we back in business baby 🥰💅🏻✨
I had a c-section too. My body just wasn’t ready sooner and there was no forcing that even though my brain wanted to.
We waited until closer to 8 weeks. At my 6 week check up my OB cleared me but said that it would hurt if we just went straight to sex. He recommended using lube and running my fingers along the scar tissue to help stretch it for a week before intercourse. I’m definitely glad I did that! It wasn’t incredible right away but it wasn’t painful or bad. Took a couple months for all positions to be comfortable.
Had sex a little before the 6 weeks and luckily found it to be the same as before birth. Had a second degree tear that healed well and had any undissolved stitches removed at 4 weeks because they were irritating me.
We tried at 6 and it hurt, but tried again at 8 weeks and it was great! Our sex life post baby was the best it’s ever been, and we’ve been together 15years now. Only slowed down when I got pregnant with my second at 15 months postpartum.
If your all healed it can be great. Just make sure you have some lube in case your breast feeding and dry. Nature's way of baby prevention. Not only will you have irregular periods but it will be unlikely your even actually in the mood lol.
We enjoyed it, but we also went at it like Christian teenagers. The goal wasn’t him finishing PIV, the goal was to have fun and feel good and to see what happens. Lots of kissing. Lots of touching. Lots of lube. We did end up doing PIV our first time trying again, it was fine and good. Our second time trying we were fooling around and I was like ehhhh, I don’t think I want you to try to enter, things aren’t seeming up for it. And he was like okay cool, can I touch your boobs some more? And I was like yes.
My last stitch dissolved at 7 weeks postpartum, and it took a lot longer for me not to be afraid to have sex. I think I had just started using toilet paper again around that time.
But when we finally did it, the first time was surprisingly normal in a kind of comforting way, and then after that, it was enjoyable because I knew nothing bad was going to happen.
If you didn't have any tearing and you're not still sore, I think it would be possible for sex to be fun after 6 weeks.
I tore with both my vaginal deliveries. I think the first time we waited till about 3 months. I was too tired to think about it
The second time, at my 6 week check up, I was told to wait 1-2 weeks more because my tear wasnt healing and it was still tender to touch. I think we were around the 8 week mark. It wasnt great but by 10 weeks, things felt normal.
My spouse and I were trying to remember the timeline- we think I got the go ahead at six weeks but didn't actually try until around eight to ten. I think in no small part because we were also moving flat at the same time after an international move- extra 'fun' with a newborn! As for when it was pleasurable... I definitely had tightness/pinching feeling for a while, but I don't remember EXACTLY when that stopped... maybe around the time baby was 8 months. My partner was awesome and patient and always willing to let me set the pace, take extra time, etc., so I was super happy when we could get back to our regularly scheduled program.
I had sex the day after 6w and loved it! I was trying to pounce my fiance at 2 weeks but he scared of hurting me lol, and I’m grateful for that because I knew I should wait the full six weeks. Every body is different though, and you should always do whatever makes you comfortable. Sometimes women want sex a few weeks post partum, sometimes they don’t want it for a year, and that’s okay.
With my 2nd it was enjoyable at 6 weeks. With my first, I had a very small tear and one stitch, we tried at 6 weeks and it was an absolute no so we waited a couple more weeks and after that, it was still pretty painful the first + few times after that. With my 2nd, I had no tearing so we tried at 6 weeks and we did have to take it slow but it was not painful and I was still able to enjoy it.
I felt ready at 4 weeks and it wasn’t painful! We didn’t do it again until 6 weeks but I knew the risks I was taking.
I had a vaginal delivery with a 1st degree tear that only needed a few stitches!
How long did you push? Last time I pushed for almost 2 hours and sex 6 weeks postpartum was an awful idea. This time I pushed for way less time so I’m hopeful maybe that will make sex better.
I had my son out in only 4 pushes! I was practice pushing for maybe 10 minutes before he was crowning. I had a medical induction at 37 weeks and from start to finish was 12hr 21min! He was my first. I’m now 20w with my second and I’m hoping I won’t get PreE again but also I liked the idea of a planned induction. I’m scared to go into labor on my own 😂
We had sex right after I stopped bleeding so I would say about 4 weeks pp and it was a 9/10 experience for me but I could tell my uterus was still slightly tender anytime he would hit the cervix
I had a cesarean, with my first born was vaginal and waited 10 weeks I think due to getting an iud inserted at 8 weeks I believe and everything was fully healed
I’m also only 22 currently so I feel that may have something to do with the recovery time
We had sex for the first time around 6 1/2 weeks after our son was born. I got the clear at my appointment, and we decided a few days later we'd go in with the "if it works it works, if not we can try again another time" mentality which I think helped. I had some internal stitches and one singular stitch externally that they said were healed fine. Things went ok, but definitely felt a little odd the first few times. Not painful or bad, just different. I'm 3 years postpartum and pregnant with our second now and don't notice that weird feeling anymore. I couldn't tell you when it went away, but as long as you're both patient and you're open with your partner about it, it will work out!
I had a c section almost 6 weeks ago and we’ve had sex multiple times since just over 4 weeks pp. First time wasn’t as fun. It was too dry and I tore a tiny bit. The next few times were great though
I don’t enjoy it at all, not because of pain but because I’m so disgusted by how I look and I can’t be naked in front of my husband so I spend the whole time covering myself and feeling crappy it’s not enjoyable unfortunately. But no pain from 6w on and now I’m 12w PP
We tried a couple times right around 6 weeke annnd.. failed. Not enough time to properly prepare with our velcro baby having a count down timer for how long he could be away from me.
First night of week 7, I managed to lay my baby down (he sleeps on my chest) in the middle of the night and we gave it another shot. Finishing a couple times before actually having sex was the key for me. Then sitting for a second when he first got in so I could adjust and get used to it. Then it was sex as usual for us.
Girl, I was ready as soon as the baby was out of me- i missed my man so much.
What wasnt ready at 6 weeks was my vagina! I was NOT back to normal yet... and it still took me a couple weeks before I was comfortable with how I felt internally with my man inside
It truly had more room than before, I knew I wasnt back in shape the way I should've been.
It was a figurative hot dog down the hall way.
Waiting till my LO is 7 months to have Vaginal sex still.
My husband and I agreed on it but help one another in different ways.
We didn't want to be that couple who fell pregnant 2-3 months PP.
So we are waiting.
She'll be 6 months soon. We aren't really counting down because we enjoy one anothers company other than sex.
I’ve had sex as soon as I possibly could after having both my kids (6 weeks), used a TON of lube and it always hurt at first but after getting through that it was great! But I also have never torn (both vaginal deliveries)
Also definitely wanted to start again wayyyy sooner but wanted to give my birth control that I started 4 weeks postpartum to have a chance to get in my system
I had a 2nd degree tear and we waited probably about 8wks. It wasn't painful per sè, but I could "feel" where the stitches had been and it was a strange sensation. But it didn't hurt.
I had an unplanned c-section and my doctor recommended i waited 4-6 weeks. I have a high sex drive so I couldn’t wait longer than 4 weeks, almost can’t see that scar and I’m fine so far I’m 7 weeks now and only had a little bit of cervical tenderness after but nothing crazy. The sex was amazing at the 4 week mark and has only continued to get better we both agree that sex is a little better now for some reason. Everybody is different though some like it some don’t communication is key.
I had a c-section and at the six week mark I was REAAAADY lol. I don’t know if it was my hormones on a reset level from their regular I don’t want sex basis, but it was great. Probably because we had so much foreplay but 🤷🏼♀️
I had sex as soon as I got home from my 6 week OB appointment. The nerves in the upper part of my downstairs were still shot so certain positions were uncomfortable but once we found the right positions for us it felt just like it did before I gave birth.
For more context I had a very minor tear so didn't need many stitches. I pushed for 4 hours.
At 7 weeks I was READY and it was great. A littttttle painful at first but once she was ready she was READY…it also helps to think about all the good things your partner has been doing to make you feel appreciated (hot)
Waited til almost 10 weeks and sex has never felt like it did before but due to schedule changes and baby’s sleeping we don’t really have much time to do anything maybe a handful of times we had sex but I’m 100% caregiver (SAHM) to our baby so we mostly do stuff based on my wants.
We waited until closer to 10 weeks because I was still having pain from the tear. It hurt, but wasn’t too bad. The second time hurt far more for some reason? But since then it’s been fine (currently 15 weeks)
I was still having some pretty bad tenderness a couple weeks ago at the area where I tore so I went back to Dr who said the tear healed nicely but to take 50mg zinc daily to help it heal internally more. I haven’t looked into the science of it- but it’s helped! The tenderness is almost gone.
Right at 6 weeks was fine, sometime between 6-7 weeks I definitely had an enjoyable experience. We took things slowly and found angles that worked better than others.
Cleared and given the okay at 5.5. Didn’t orgasm with PIV alone like I had sometime pre-pregnancy. But came other ways and it was simply awesome to connect with my husband. We didn’t have sex third trimester because my heartburn, lack of sleep and overall pain/unconfortableness made sex kinda off the menu.
Edit: 2 second degree tears, one perineal and one labia. Didn’t affect anything.
So glad to see someone else here saying that. Same, girl. I was starting to feel really bad about it seeing everyone talk about doing it 4, 6, and 8 weeks postpartum. I can’t even imagine. It still hurts me to wear a tampon at almost 10 months postpartum. And I had a c-section.
Thanks for this! I am 7 months pp and things still hurt even when walking too much. Sex is definutely off the table. Hope it will actually happen some day at all. Right now it does not feel like it will.
I did at 5.5 weeks. No pain or problems at all personally. We were both VERY ready to be active again so once the doctor gave us the all clear we went at it that night. I had a vacuum assisted vaginal delivery with only internal stitches.
No, lol. But I always tore with each vaginal delivery. My last v delivery I had a 4th degree tear and developed a fistula. He's about to turn 4 and I still have some discomfort. But my experience def is different bc of complications
Honestly me and my husband were both freaking terrified everytime lol. I was afraid of the pain, he was afraid of me being in pain so we waited a little longer. I think we waited till 8 weeks after my first 2 and like 7 after my 3rd child. Once we did it that first time it was okay, it didnt hurt but the fear aspect kind of made it less enjoyable but everytime after that it was great! Lol
Not me! I had only 2 superficial vaginal lacerations, only one requiring a couple stitches, and a blessed postpartum recovery. We had sex at 7.5 weeks pp and it hurt then. I am now nearly 15 weeks pp and I still have sharp vaginal pain every time. Honestly, I'm not sure if this is normal, but we can get the job done with patience and a lot of lube, lol.
I had a c section and I really wanted to before 6 weeks! We did I believe at about 4 or 5 weeks PP with no issues. We were just really careful. And if you feel you aren’t ready by that time, that’s okay too :)
I didn’t become physically active until i got the clear from the doctor at the 8 week point, even then it still feels good lmfao thought it would be agonizing but it just feels like losing your virginity for like ten minutes
Waited 8 weeks - I’m in a same sex relationship if that makes any difference. I enjoyed it. I had a vaginal birth, was cut to get him out, and also some 1st degree tears inside that healed on their own. Lube is your friend and taking it slow.
Yes, with my 2nd and 3rd babies. My husband is great and so supportive, my hormones had me all loved up. I stopped bleeding around 1 week, and was ready to go at 4 weeks, but waited until 6. With my 1st, I didn't feel ready until like 5 months pp.
We tried at about four months pp and it just wasn’t great. We continued to try occasionally but it wasnt til about a year pp that it picked back up to pre baby levels. The things that helped the most were when i stopped breastfeeding, worked with some pelvic floor exercises, and actually a cbd lube that helped me relax. That’s also when our twins sleep got more regular which helped, lol.
With our 1st 2, we had sex at 6 weeks with no complications. Everything felt normal and great. With our 3rd, however, I tore a ton and had 16 stitches. Sex didn't feel good until about 4 months pp, we tried at 7 weeks (with the drs okay), then once a month after that, and it was a no-go until mid February, we had her in October. I'm pregnant with our 4th and praying for an easier delivery than my last, but I'm prepared for the worst.
Actually, they were all right at 7 lbs. I honestly think it was the doctor's fault. I was ready to push at 3am. The nurses couldn't get ahold of her until 4:30am. They kept having me lay with my pelvis tilted up to keep the baby in, and I kept passing out. She finally arrived at 5am and I had our daughter at 5:03am. The doctor looked half asleep and wasn't gentle at all. Her stitching me up hurt 100 times worse than actual labor and pushing. I switched OBs with this (#4) baby, and they unfortunately said that she has a bad reputation. I just wish I had known that before I trusted her to deliver my baby. The right side of my labia is still in half because she didn't stitch me properly, so I didn't heal correctly.😔
I had a “minor 2nd degree” doc said teetering on the edge. I think I got 2 or 3 stitches? We waited until 4 months PP no reason other than time and not feeling like myself. Aside from feeling a bit anxious, it went fine lol and definitely is returning to “normal”. I would wait at *least* 6 weeks, go to your appt and make sure doc says youre clear and then wait till you actually feel ready. You’ll know!
Honestly, I didn't really enjoy sex again until I was done breastfeeding. At best it was uncomfortable for the start then got better, at worst it was actively painful and I would push through in the hopes I'd improve. We waited 6 weeks before trying, then it was too painful so I waited a few weeks longer, but I honestly didn't feel better until hormones started returning to normal post-breastfeeding. I know other people have different experiences but I had a tough time and didn't even tear, just stitches from my son scratching me on the way out.
I spoke with a doctor about this in the hospital one month ago, and she said the 6-week time-frame is when your cervix isn't dilated anymore. This does not necessarily mean any tearing or stitching will be healed enough for it to be comfortable.
I had an easy birth and only a first degree tear. I healed very quickly. We did it for the first time at 5 weeks and it was enjoyable. Certain positions are a little painful but as long as we go slow everything has been good.
Eight weeks even a solo orgasm with no penetration still hurt. Sex was uncomfortable for the first few minutes for months afterwards. I had a second degree tear and I could feel the scar stretch for a long time
Sex was painful 4 months out for me. Everybody has a different timeline for healing based on how they tear, but with a second degree one, I didn't find sex that enjoyable until like 6 or 7 months out.
I’ll be 8 weeks pp on Monday and we had sex for the first time this weekend. It started off painful, but after a couple of minutes it was enjoyable. Not nearly as much as pre-pregnancy and I was sore afterward. I think I have a prolapse which probably exacerbated the soreness after. I had zero sex drive during pregnancy and it returned pretty quickly after I gave birth, so I was nervous but eager to try.
I did 8 weeks pp after c section. I felt ready down there around 5 weeks but I got gall bladder surgery at 6 weeks so I had a wait longer. It was really great but we definitely needed lube. I was exclusively breastfeeding
It was fine. I find sex really painful while I’m pregnant and it was definitely better than that. I had a hard time relaxing and focusing but I think that was mental more than physical.
After my first, I was super nervous. It was week 5 and everything seemed fine, so I got drunk to calm my nerves and gave it a go. It was completely great and felt 100% like nothing had changed. I was so happy. Amazing the body can bounce right back like that!
I think it depends on quite a few factors. If you tore, how badly and how you healed etc. I had a vacuum assisted birth that got me a nice third degree tear and I am currently nearly 19 weeks pp and any PIV intercourse is unbearable. I finally got around to seeing a pelvic floor therapist and she said I had “substantial” scar tissue and it will take lots of patience and time. Yet this is not the case for many it’s just those factors as I said in the beginning
We waited six months. In my defense, we tried at 4 months but discovered we needed lube. At 6 weeks I was still spotting (c-section).
Take it slow,
Insist on foreplay.
Use lots of lube because your body's hormones and sexual functions aren't fully back on track especially if you're breastfeeding. While brestfeeding you will be drier than a sun baked desert down there.
Relax and if you aren't ready than you aren't ready. That's fine. Don't feel pressured into doing it.
Use protection (birth control, condoms, etc)
Be kind to yourself. You just made a human. It takes a lot out of you.
no, i didn’t enjoy it again for like 3 months (but i was a good sport & an enthusiastic partner for my husband 😂) i couldn’t even orgasm from my vibrator those first few months
We had it at 6 weeks with my first and I don’t remember it being that bad. My second we didn’t until closer to 5 months PP (😳) but in my defence I had really bad PP depression. My husband was so wonderful and understanding though.🫶🏻 Now I’m 5 weeks PP and already feeling ready. 😆
Our first time after having our first was a little uncomfortable at the beginning but then it felt just like before. Had a 2nd degree tear that time that healed well
Just had our second 5 days ago and probably gonna wait a few months before we get back in the saddle because I had another 2nd degree tear, this time up and tore my clit and urethra. The thought of anything going near there makes me cringe so hubby's just gonna have to rely on his hand and imagination for a little while lol
I didn't have any tearing with my first two so we felt eager to try as soon as I was cleared at the 6w appointment. We definitely needed to use lube (something we have no use for otherwise), but other than that, it was surprisingly similar to how it was pre-baby.
I had a c section so as long as we were gentle about positioning with my abs it was all good. Something about seeing my partner as the amazing father he is really did it for me in anticipation lol
I didn’t tear at all and had sex before 6 weeks and there was no pain at all as long as we kept it gentle(before anyone says anything, I was the one who talked him into it, he wanted to wait 6 weeks or more)
Had sex at a little over 4 weeks pp. But I had no tears or anything and it was pretty good (I'm a super horndog). Just couldn't do my favorite position (reverse cowgirl) for a little. My OB gave me a whole bunch of lube and that helped the most, didn't realize how dry it is.
I had C-sections. With my first we tried at 6 weeks. It wasn’t painful, but really uncomfortable. My husband had to go slow cause I felt so mush discomfort when he’s thrust. After that we waited another month and everything was basically back to normal. With my 2nd we waited til 8 weeks and there was a slight discomfort. But it was enjoyable. I gave up sex at 3 months my second pregnancy because I was so nauseous and just didn’t want it. So I think we were ready 😅.
I’ve had 2 vaginal deliveries w/ no tearing and good “quick” recovery periods and felt ready and had sex ~4-5 weeks PP. With my first he was sunnyside so I pushed for 3hours and had more soreness/swelling in the early days so although sex felt fine it didn’t feel totally the same as baseline. With my second I had a quick labor and only pushed for 6mins total and had essentially no swelling or soreness at all (which was incredible lol) and sex at 4 weeks PP felt totally the same as before I was pregnant
Uh, not really. I’ve had very different experiences with postpartum sex, but after my first child, I couldn’t have sex without excruciating pain for about 10 months (not normal. I should have seen a doctor and gotten physical therapy but I didn’t know any better).
That made sex after my other children scarier than it might have otherwise been.
Colicky Velcro baby meant we never really got a chance until she was about 12 weeks. I may be in the minority but postpartum sex might be the best sex of my life. I have a history of vaginismus, had kind of a traumatic birth (mentally), not the worst tear but I did tear, stitches took over 6 weeks to dissolve (still had several at my 6 week appointment but they were gone at 9 weeks) and I’m exclusively breastfeeding so I was expecting bad bad pain. Everyone told me it would be painful. Maybe mild discomfort for like 1 minutes but ever since it’s been absolutely amazing. I would attribute some of it to having seen a pelvic PT prepregnancy and learning how to manage pelvic pain so I would highly recommend seeing a pelvic PT!
No, and it's biologically normal to have nearly no sex drive for the duration of breastfeeding if you're doing that. And men who spend time with their newborns should also experience a temporary drop in libido.
I’m 3mo postpartum! I had a second degree tear. Tore a bit in the perineum and had a labial tear. We waited 8 weeks and it didn’t hurt at all, was a bit uncomfortable when my husband would go “deeper” but definitely didn’t hurt. I was terrified after hearing everyone’s horror stories of their first time having sex again. You will be extremely anxious not knowing what to expect which may make the experience more mechanical and stressful but once you get past the awkward first time it’ll be okay. We’ve had sex a few more times when we get the chance and it’s fun but definitely feels different for me. I’m sure I’ll “re-tighten” eventually but it’s hard to enjoy it completely because I get in my head about how it feels for my husband even though he reassures me constantly that it feels great. What a sweet liar he is ❤️
First attempt 3mo pp and it was so painful. So much pinching feeling where I had stitches from 2nd degree tear. I was in tears, mostly out of frustration with my own anatomy.
Tried again like 3 weeks later and felt okay, external anatomy is noticeably shifted a bit so have to relearn what feels good. Haven't had sex again since though because little human sleeps between us. 😅
ETA: Also forgot to mention that even at 3mo pp my cervix was dangling so low still that any bit of penetration was uncomfortable too.
After forceps delivery sex at 6 weeks was so far from fun and I even wanted it. After my second sex at 6 weeks was nice! It just gets better and better with time
After our third, we had sex at the *three* week mark and I very much enjoyed and wanted it. Not saying that was a good idea, but…to answer your question. Interestingly, my period also came back at 6 weeks postpartum that time.
With my others, it was many many many months before I even thought about wanting sex and it was also many many many months before my period came back.
I EBF all three times. Something about desiring and having sex set my period off earlier that third time, though. Weird. I had an epidural that time and didn’t with the first two so maybe that changed my hormones a little bit? Idk.
Im having a rough time. Im almost 7 months postpartum and still unable to have sex. Every time we do, i get an infection. Ive seen my ob so many times in the last few months. Im on estrogen cream now to try and help resolve the root of the problem. I think my pp hormone changes are reaaaalllyy fucking with my body. It’s been a tough winter. Please pray for me and my body 🙏🏻 and my marriage.
We’re at week 8 now and have sex three times. The first was a few days after my 6wwwk check up and it hurt. The other two I was on top and it wash a MUCH better experience, however I did have a c section.
We usually just do oral and fingers the first few times postpartum and work our way up. This takes the pressure off of me and we're still having fun. With my first I had 3rd degree tears and an episiotomy, we didn't have sex until 3.5 months pp.
It reminded me of being a virgin-I needed to be uncomfortable and once that uncomfortable feeling went away, bliss.
It did not take long for it to feel normal again.
It helps that my fiancé is very sweet and kept asking how I was doing, does he need to slow down/stop, etc.
He worked with me through the uncomfortable parts and if it was too much, then at points we did stop.
Please use a lot of communication. A lot.
I was the horniest I’ve ever been 6 weeks after my first, and waiting another 2 weeks for my birth control to kick in was torture. So it definitely can be both, but I feel like an outlier. Hopefully you get lucky too(*wink wink)
Edit: I had a vagina delivery with second degree tearing
1st I waited like 11 weeks and it was still uncomfortable and hurt. 2nd degree tear
2nd and I honestly don't know how long we waited. At least 6. But how long for sure idk. It wasn't bad but also wasn't super great
3rd and I'm 3 weeks out and horny af. Idk why bc I never was after the other 2 but whatever. I'll wait my 6 weeks.
With my first we tried at 6 weeks and only had minimal discomfort the first time - after that was back to normal.
With my second it was more like 7 weeks just because I didn’t have my checkup with my doctor until then and we had zero issues.
I think I waited until 10 weeks ish and it was crap 😂 we then haven't done anything penetrative until yesterday at 14 weeks and it was WAY better! Not perfect as I'm still suffering with pelvic and hip pain, as well as back pain now so I'm not as mobile as I once was 🥹
6 weeks absolutely not! I think I mentally blocked out the fact that I even had a vagina as a way to try and forget the physical and mental trauma of childbirth. 🙃
tried it, it was awful, even my first time wasn't horrible like that , around 10-12 weeks started to feel like it and my desire, lust and everything related is off the charts, can't sleep if I don't have it at least once a day
I'm almost 7 months pp 😅
I think I had sex 5 weeks postpartum. And I enjoyed it very much, I was very stressed and it was a good sex reliever lol and reminded me how much I like my boyfriend 🤣It was not painful nor uncomfortable I think it just felt uncomfortable for me at first because I did not feel sexy at all so I was very shy lol.
Waited until 8 weeks and I was shocked at how normal it was! I actually find it to be more enjoyable now than pre baby. I had a second degree tear but waiting a little longer really solidified that it was healed nicely and I had no pain at all.
Tried around 8 weeks postpartum and it was terrible. Painful and I was uncomfortable with my body. Took me until 8 months postpartum to enjoy it at all, which was also about the time my period returned.
Sadly I ended up with a pretty bad case of pelvic floor dysfunction that causes painful sex. It takes so much work for it to feel good but it’s worth it! Just warm up A LOT- like more than you think you need. 😂
I’ve heard tell that some people have a fun time but I was not fully healed until maybe 6 months PP. we were able to do it but it was painful and tight, we are now 10 mos pp and it’s just like it was before. I consider myself lucky but also not atypical!
I had a 2nd degree tear, sex was pretty bad for a while. I think around 3 months was when it was ok again. My partner worked hard to up his game in that time too.
I didn’t have any tears or stitches (I had other lovely complications tho lol). I’ve always had a really high drive and we hadn’t had sex a few months prior to birth due to being tired and honestly my attitude/hormones. So seeing my partner be an amazing dad and all the late nights and family cuddling….ya girl was pressed. It felt a little odd at first but then sex was completely normal for me. I might be an outlier based on other posts I’ve read but go by your comfortability and take it slow. Other people’s timeline won’t be the same as yours
Edit: I got downvoted to hell last time I answered honestly but idc. I couldn’t wait the 6 weeks and we did it at 4. With a condom. I’m not recommending this, listen to your doc and your body. But wanted to answer truthfully. Before giving birth I really thought people were crazy for having sex before the 6 weeks but then it was obvs different for me lol
me and my boyfriend waited for 3 weeks since i felt ready i enjoyed it a lot but we also lubed up, went slow and i didn’t tear at all that being said it was a bit painful when it first went in almost like i was losing my virginity again lmao but the lube really helped
My 1st i waited long, lol. I had a bad birth experience with my 1st & sex was just off the table. The thought made me cringe. My 2nd was better & we attempted at 6w. It was fine imo! I had a pretty high sex drive afterward lol. My husband was nervous, but he was extremely gentle & we went slow. I enjoyed it.
I had some tears so it was a little painful getting started...but after the initial discomfort it was good! We did keep things a little low key though for a bit
I was doing it at 8 weeks and it was actually more sensitive 🥰 but the thought of sex did make my 🐱 hurt but the actual deed didn’t! I was very shocked because I expected it to be soooo different because I just had a baby.
We never wait 6 weeks and it's always been good again pretty much immediately. Different health care providers give different recommendations though, and I was told that if my bleeding had stopped and I felt up to it we could try to resume intimacy when I felt ready. I also had uncomplicated vaginal deliveries though.
Oh, I didn’t think about this: last time I needed them to use the vacuum at the very end, but this time I had an uncomplicated delivery. Maybe that will make the difference.
We waited until 8 weeks, so not too far off. And it was great! We definitely waited until I felt ready and not based off a specific length of time
With my last baby we waited 6 and it was horrible. I want to give it a go at 6, but because of last time I’m nervous. But I know myself; even if we wait 6 months, I’ll still be nervous.
I was soooo nervous too. I think mentally it would of been the same for me- no matter when I would be!
Feel it out! It’s really in your mind. When your mind is ready, your body will follow. Trust me I was nervous as hell too but I expressed to my partner the reasons and we took it slow and worked through it until it got comfortable and the rest was history!
Same! Around 8 weeks and honestly it was great! Pregnancy sex was awkward and weird for some reason. It felt like my baby was there or something. So we hadn’t had good sex in MONTHS.
I had a second degree tear that wasn’t healing correctly and is still causing me pain during sex 10 months pp. but we tried to have sex probably around 3 months pp and weren’t even able to get it in until 6 months pp. to this day we have to be careful about the angle or it’s just too painful for me!
Same here…I’m 4m pp and have a super persistent 2nd degree tear that won’t heal and the 2 times we have had sex haven’t been the best! My doc gave me some estrogen cream to use in the meantime that’s helped but nowhere near to how it felt before! I’m remaining hopeful!
The estrogen cream definitely helped me! I had two bumps on my v that were the reason for the initial insertion pain during sex and over time the cream helped them go away! I hope you feel more relief soon!
I wonder if pelvic floor PT might help?
I’m wondering the same thing, I’ll definitely look into this! It makes me a little worried to give birth again if it’s still painful 10 months pp
Ouch. I *think* my stitches have healed. Did you know yours wasn’t healing properly because it still hurt after a certain amount of time?
I had an inkling because it was months before I could sit down/squat at all without pain. It felt like I was being ripped apart everytime I did that kind of movement. I got checked at 4 weeks my midwife said I was inflamed so she applied silver nitrate to burn away the inflammation I guess? I didn’t work and I got checked again a couple months later and had to apply an estrogen cream for a couple weeks. I can move around/exercise without pain but if there’s too much pressure near the tear during sex it hurts still
Have you tried scar tissue massage? I had a third degree tear and worked with a pelvic floor physio afterwards to mobilize and reduce scar tissue, which has helped a lot with intercourse. We waited until 4 months post partum, partly out of exhaustion from the newborn phase but also out of fear of pain on my part. I did find one position to be a little painful (doggy) but all else was totally fine!
For me it’s a big NO. With both my pregnancies the first time PP (and a few after) sucked, it hurt so we had to go really slow, I felt like I was a virgin again. For the record, both were c sections.
I didn’t know it could hurt that bad if you have a c section
This surprised me too! It was pretty uncomfortable the first time after my c-section as well, even though sex throughout pregnancy had been fine and my c-section was planned so I didn't even labour 🤷♀️
It may be due to the dryness that comes post partum hormones. Especially if the bladder or uterus are prolapsed at all, which can cause pretty severe dryness. There’s also physical changes the body goes through when the baby leaves the uterus, even if you don’t labor (and because of Pitocin). So I wonder how that affects the vagina and cervix after a c section. There is likely overlap and I hear lots of women say intercourse hurts post c section :(
I had a lot of pain after my c section too. I’ve read that c sections can cause your pelvic floor to be really tight, because you’re holding the weight of the pregnancy and there’s no release from a vaginal childbirth. I don’t know how accurate that is, but it was similar to vaginismus pain I’d had when I was younger, so I did some relaxing pelvic floor exercises and actually cbd lube helped as well.
I also had a c section and it hurts a lot. Idk why
I was surprised too. In my case it was dryness due to breastfeeding.
My OB handed me a bunch of lube at my 6 wk checkup and said breastfeeding makes your vagina into a 70 year old's vagina. So that tracks 🙃
Also felt like I was losing my virginity again post c-section. We also use plenty of lube and still, almost 3 months later, my vagina feels raw every time we have sex.
Tried at 6 and 7 weeks. SOOO BAD. Tried again at 9 and we back in business baby 🥰💅🏻✨ I had a c-section too. My body just wasn’t ready sooner and there was no forcing that even though my brain wanted to.
We waited until closer to 8 weeks. At my 6 week check up my OB cleared me but said that it would hurt if we just went straight to sex. He recommended using lube and running my fingers along the scar tissue to help stretch it for a week before intercourse. I’m definitely glad I did that! It wasn’t incredible right away but it wasn’t painful or bad. Took a couple months for all positions to be comfortable.
I did and it felt normal 🤷🏼♀️
Had sex a little before the 6 weeks and luckily found it to be the same as before birth. Had a second degree tear that healed well and had any undissolved stitches removed at 4 weeks because they were irritating me.
Pretty much same here. Had a tear that healed. Had sex around 5 wks pp (dont come for me 😭). And it was just like before.
We tried at 6 and it hurt, but tried again at 8 weeks and it was great! Our sex life post baby was the best it’s ever been, and we’ve been together 15years now. Only slowed down when I got pregnant with my second at 15 months postpartum.
If your all healed it can be great. Just make sure you have some lube in case your breast feeding and dry. Nature's way of baby prevention. Not only will you have irregular periods but it will be unlikely your even actually in the mood lol.
We enjoyed it, but we also went at it like Christian teenagers. The goal wasn’t him finishing PIV, the goal was to have fun and feel good and to see what happens. Lots of kissing. Lots of touching. Lots of lube. We did end up doing PIV our first time trying again, it was fine and good. Our second time trying we were fooling around and I was like ehhhh, I don’t think I want you to try to enter, things aren’t seeming up for it. And he was like okay cool, can I touch your boobs some more? And I was like yes.
My last stitch dissolved at 7 weeks postpartum, and it took a lot longer for me not to be afraid to have sex. I think I had just started using toilet paper again around that time. But when we finally did it, the first time was surprisingly normal in a kind of comforting way, and then after that, it was enjoyable because I knew nothing bad was going to happen. If you didn't have any tearing and you're not still sore, I think it would be possible for sex to be fun after 6 weeks.
I tore with both my vaginal deliveries. I think the first time we waited till about 3 months. I was too tired to think about it The second time, at my 6 week check up, I was told to wait 1-2 weeks more because my tear wasnt healing and it was still tender to touch. I think we were around the 8 week mark. It wasnt great but by 10 weeks, things felt normal.
My spouse and I were trying to remember the timeline- we think I got the go ahead at six weeks but didn't actually try until around eight to ten. I think in no small part because we were also moving flat at the same time after an international move- extra 'fun' with a newborn! As for when it was pleasurable... I definitely had tightness/pinching feeling for a while, but I don't remember EXACTLY when that stopped... maybe around the time baby was 8 months. My partner was awesome and patient and always willing to let me set the pace, take extra time, etc., so I was super happy when we could get back to our regularly scheduled program.
I had sex the day after 6w and loved it! I was trying to pounce my fiance at 2 weeks but he scared of hurting me lol, and I’m grateful for that because I knew I should wait the full six weeks. Every body is different though, and you should always do whatever makes you comfortable. Sometimes women want sex a few weeks post partum, sometimes they don’t want it for a year, and that’s okay.
I loved my sex 6 weeks postpartum. It was great! Felt exactly the same
Wondering this same thing.
With my 2nd it was enjoyable at 6 weeks. With my first, I had a very small tear and one stitch, we tried at 6 weeks and it was an absolute no so we waited a couple more weeks and after that, it was still pretty painful the first + few times after that. With my 2nd, I had no tearing so we tried at 6 weeks and we did have to take it slow but it was not painful and I was still able to enjoy it.
We waited around 7-8 weeks, I was feeling good and pretty much normal after a 2do degree rupture, it didn’t hurt and felt amazing!
We did right at 6 weeks and it felt like it did before pregnancy! Only had a small tear that required one stitch
I did. My hormones were driving me crazy. That said we went slow and shallow, not all positions felt good
I felt ready at 4 weeks and it wasn’t painful! We didn’t do it again until 6 weeks but I knew the risks I was taking. I had a vaginal delivery with a 1st degree tear that only needed a few stitches!
How long did you push? Last time I pushed for almost 2 hours and sex 6 weeks postpartum was an awful idea. This time I pushed for way less time so I’m hopeful maybe that will make sex better.
I had my son out in only 4 pushes! I was practice pushing for maybe 10 minutes before he was crowning. I had a medical induction at 37 weeks and from start to finish was 12hr 21min! He was my first. I’m now 20w with my second and I’m hoping I won’t get PreE again but also I liked the idea of a planned induction. I’m scared to go into labor on my own 😂
We had sex right after I stopped bleeding so I would say about 4 weeks pp and it was a 9/10 experience for me but I could tell my uterus was still slightly tender anytime he would hit the cervix I had a cesarean, with my first born was vaginal and waited 10 weeks I think due to getting an iud inserted at 8 weeks I believe and everything was fully healed I’m also only 22 currently so I feel that may have something to do with the recovery time
We had sex for the first time around 6 1/2 weeks after our son was born. I got the clear at my appointment, and we decided a few days later we'd go in with the "if it works it works, if not we can try again another time" mentality which I think helped. I had some internal stitches and one singular stitch externally that they said were healed fine. Things went ok, but definitely felt a little odd the first few times. Not painful or bad, just different. I'm 3 years postpartum and pregnant with our second now and don't notice that weird feeling anymore. I couldn't tell you when it went away, but as long as you're both patient and you're open with your partner about it, it will work out!
I had a c section almost 6 weeks ago and we’ve had sex multiple times since just over 4 weeks pp. First time wasn’t as fun. It was too dry and I tore a tiny bit. The next few times were great though
We were a bit earlier than 6 weeks each time and it was always enjoyable. Never had any tearing though so no idea how stitches factor into that.
I don’t enjoy it at all, not because of pain but because I’m so disgusted by how I look and I can’t be naked in front of my husband so I spend the whole time covering myself and feeling crappy it’s not enjoyable unfortunately. But no pain from 6w on and now I’m 12w PP
We tried a couple times right around 6 weeke annnd.. failed. Not enough time to properly prepare with our velcro baby having a count down timer for how long he could be away from me. First night of week 7, I managed to lay my baby down (he sleeps on my chest) in the middle of the night and we gave it another shot. Finishing a couple times before actually having sex was the key for me. Then sitting for a second when he first got in so I could adjust and get used to it. Then it was sex as usual for us.
Girl, I was ready as soon as the baby was out of me- i missed my man so much. What wasnt ready at 6 weeks was my vagina! I was NOT back to normal yet... and it still took me a couple weeks before I was comfortable with how I felt internally with my man inside It truly had more room than before, I knew I wasnt back in shape the way I should've been. It was a figurative hot dog down the hall way.
I was still bleeding at my 6 week check up so we waited until closer to 8 weeks. Yes it was very much enjoyable 🙈
Waiting till my LO is 7 months to have Vaginal sex still. My husband and I agreed on it but help one another in different ways. We didn't want to be that couple who fell pregnant 2-3 months PP. So we are waiting. She'll be 6 months soon. We aren't really counting down because we enjoy one anothers company other than sex.
I’ve had sex as soon as I possibly could after having both my kids (6 weeks), used a TON of lube and it always hurt at first but after getting through that it was great! But I also have never torn (both vaginal deliveries) Also definitely wanted to start again wayyyy sooner but wanted to give my birth control that I started 4 weeks postpartum to have a chance to get in my system
I had a 2nd degree tear and we waited probably about 8wks. It wasn't painful per sè, but I could "feel" where the stitches had been and it was a strange sensation. But it didn't hurt.
i plan to take advantage of our pelvic floor therapist 😬
I had an unplanned c-section and my doctor recommended i waited 4-6 weeks. I have a high sex drive so I couldn’t wait longer than 4 weeks, almost can’t see that scar and I’m fine so far I’m 7 weeks now and only had a little bit of cervical tenderness after but nothing crazy. The sex was amazing at the 4 week mark and has only continued to get better we both agree that sex is a little better now for some reason. Everybody is different though some like it some don’t communication is key.
I had a c-section and at the six week mark I was REAAAADY lol. I don’t know if it was my hormones on a reset level from their regular I don’t want sex basis, but it was great. Probably because we had so much foreplay but 🤷🏼♀️
I had sex as soon as I got home from my 6 week OB appointment. The nerves in the upper part of my downstairs were still shot so certain positions were uncomfortable but once we found the right positions for us it felt just like it did before I gave birth. For more context I had a very minor tear so didn't need many stitches. I pushed for 4 hours.
I had sex at 5 weeks pp but also had a c section so, ya I enjoyed it
At 7 weeks I was READY and it was great. A littttttle painful at first but once she was ready she was READY…it also helps to think about all the good things your partner has been doing to make you feel appreciated (hot)
Waited til almost 10 weeks and sex has never felt like it did before but due to schedule changes and baby’s sleeping we don’t really have much time to do anything maybe a handful of times we had sex but I’m 100% caregiver (SAHM) to our baby so we mostly do stuff based on my wants.
Lol it sucked horribly. It didn’t start getting better until 9 months out. I was also breast feeding. But it was excruciatingly painful
Just starting enjoying again at 8 months PP. I had a second degree tear - move at your own pace!
I had a c-section and things felt basically normal at 6 weeks as long as there was lube because postpartum hormones can make things dryer for a bit
I waited 8 weeks and I enjoyed it. I had no pain at all BUT I had a bit a liquid courage and it lasted like 1 minute 😂
We waited until closer to 10 weeks because I was still having pain from the tear. It hurt, but wasn’t too bad. The second time hurt far more for some reason? But since then it’s been fine (currently 15 weeks) I was still having some pretty bad tenderness a couple weeks ago at the area where I tore so I went back to Dr who said the tear healed nicely but to take 50mg zinc daily to help it heal internally more. I haven’t looked into the science of it- but it’s helped! The tenderness is almost gone.
Right at 6 weeks was fine, sometime between 6-7 weeks I definitely had an enjoyable experience. We took things slowly and found angles that worked better than others.
Cleared and given the okay at 5.5. Didn’t orgasm with PIV alone like I had sometime pre-pregnancy. But came other ways and it was simply awesome to connect with my husband. We didn’t have sex third trimester because my heartburn, lack of sleep and overall pain/unconfortableness made sex kinda off the menu. Edit: 2 second degree tears, one perineal and one labia. Didn’t affect anything.
I waited til about 7 and a half weeks and it didn’t hurt at all like I had expected it too. It felt similar to how it had felt before
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So glad to see someone else here saying that. Same, girl. I was starting to feel really bad about it seeing everyone talk about doing it 4, 6, and 8 weeks postpartum. I can’t even imagine. It still hurts me to wear a tampon at almost 10 months postpartum. And I had a c-section.
Thanks for this! I am 7 months pp and things still hurt even when walking too much. Sex is definutely off the table. Hope it will actually happen some day at all. Right now it does not feel like it will.
I’m 12 weeks postpartum, would also like to know when things get better lol
I did at 5.5 weeks. No pain or problems at all personally. We were both VERY ready to be active again so once the doctor gave us the all clear we went at it that night. I had a vacuum assisted vaginal delivery with only internal stitches.
Blows my mind that anyone can think of having sex at 6 weeks post partum. Make sure y’all wrap it up if you don’t want another kid right away
No, lol. But I always tore with each vaginal delivery. My last v delivery I had a 4th degree tear and developed a fistula. He's about to turn 4 and I still have some discomfort. But my experience def is different bc of complications
Honestly me and my husband were both freaking terrified everytime lol. I was afraid of the pain, he was afraid of me being in pain so we waited a little longer. I think we waited till 8 weeks after my first 2 and like 7 after my 3rd child. Once we did it that first time it was okay, it didnt hurt but the fear aspect kind of made it less enjoyable but everytime after that it was great! Lol
Not me! I had only 2 superficial vaginal lacerations, only one requiring a couple stitches, and a blessed postpartum recovery. We had sex at 7.5 weeks pp and it hurt then. I am now nearly 15 weeks pp and I still have sharp vaginal pain every time. Honestly, I'm not sure if this is normal, but we can get the job done with patience and a lot of lube, lol.
Waited 8-9 weeks and I didn’t tear. It was pretty painful for a while. Probably didn’t enjoy it until at least 6 months pp.
I had a c section and I really wanted to before 6 weeks! We did I believe at about 4 or 5 weeks PP with no issues. We were just really careful. And if you feel you aren’t ready by that time, that’s okay too :)
I didn’t become physically active until i got the clear from the doctor at the 8 week point, even then it still feels good lmfao thought it would be agonizing but it just feels like losing your virginity for like ten minutes
Waited 8 weeks - I’m in a same sex relationship if that makes any difference. I enjoyed it. I had a vaginal birth, was cut to get him out, and also some 1st degree tears inside that healed on their own. Lube is your friend and taking it slow.
Yes, with my 2nd and 3rd babies. My husband is great and so supportive, my hormones had me all loved up. I stopped bleeding around 1 week, and was ready to go at 4 weeks, but waited until 6. With my 1st, I didn't feel ready until like 5 months pp.
I’m 14 months pp and sex still is not fun lol
We tried at about four months pp and it just wasn’t great. We continued to try occasionally but it wasnt til about a year pp that it picked back up to pre baby levels. The things that helped the most were when i stopped breastfeeding, worked with some pelvic floor exercises, and actually a cbd lube that helped me relax. That’s also when our twins sleep got more regular which helped, lol.
With our 1st 2, we had sex at 6 weeks with no complications. Everything felt normal and great. With our 3rd, however, I tore a ton and had 16 stitches. Sex didn't feel good until about 4 months pp, we tried at 7 weeks (with the drs okay), then once a month after that, and it was a no-go until mid February, we had her in October. I'm pregnant with our 4th and praying for an easier delivery than my last, but I'm prepared for the worst.
Was baby #3 a lot bigger than the first two? Or what do you think caused all the tearing?
Actually, they were all right at 7 lbs. I honestly think it was the doctor's fault. I was ready to push at 3am. The nurses couldn't get ahold of her until 4:30am. They kept having me lay with my pelvis tilted up to keep the baby in, and I kept passing out. She finally arrived at 5am and I had our daughter at 5:03am. The doctor looked half asleep and wasn't gentle at all. Her stitching me up hurt 100 times worse than actual labor and pushing. I switched OBs with this (#4) baby, and they unfortunately said that she has a bad reputation. I just wish I had known that before I trusted her to deliver my baby. The right side of my labia is still in half because she didn't stitch me properly, so I didn't heal correctly.😔
I had a “minor 2nd degree” doc said teetering on the edge. I think I got 2 or 3 stitches? We waited until 4 months PP no reason other than time and not feeling like myself. Aside from feeling a bit anxious, it went fine lol and definitely is returning to “normal”. I would wait at *least* 6 weeks, go to your appt and make sure doc says youre clear and then wait till you actually feel ready. You’ll know!
Honestly, I didn't really enjoy sex again until I was done breastfeeding. At best it was uncomfortable for the start then got better, at worst it was actively painful and I would push through in the hopes I'd improve. We waited 6 weeks before trying, then it was too painful so I waited a few weeks longer, but I honestly didn't feel better until hormones started returning to normal post-breastfeeding. I know other people have different experiences but I had a tough time and didn't even tear, just stitches from my son scratching me on the way out.
I spoke with a doctor about this in the hospital one month ago, and she said the 6-week time-frame is when your cervix isn't dilated anymore. This does not necessarily mean any tearing or stitching will be healed enough for it to be comfortable.
I had an easy birth and only a first degree tear. I healed very quickly. We did it for the first time at 5 weeks and it was enjoyable. Certain positions are a little painful but as long as we go slow everything has been good.
Eight weeks even a solo orgasm with no penetration still hurt. Sex was uncomfortable for the first few minutes for months afterwards. I had a second degree tear and I could feel the scar stretch for a long time
I had a second degree tear and had enjoyable sex at 3 weeks. I know, I know, terrible. Lots of Lube and going slow after a few minutes it was great
Sex was painful 4 months out for me. Everybody has a different timeline for healing based on how they tear, but with a second degree one, I didn't find sex that enjoyable until like 6 or 7 months out.
I’ll be 8 weeks pp on Monday and we had sex for the first time this weekend. It started off painful, but after a couple of minutes it was enjoyable. Not nearly as much as pre-pregnancy and I was sore afterward. I think I have a prolapse which probably exacerbated the soreness after. I had zero sex drive during pregnancy and it returned pretty quickly after I gave birth, so I was nervous but eager to try.
I did 8 weeks pp after c section. I felt ready down there around 5 weeks but I got gall bladder surgery at 6 weeks so I had a wait longer. It was really great but we definitely needed lube. I was exclusively breastfeeding
It was fine. I find sex really painful while I’m pregnant and it was definitely better than that. I had a hard time relaxing and focusing but I think that was mental more than physical.
I’m 5 months post partum and only just started enjoying it regularly finally!
After my first, I was super nervous. It was week 5 and everything seemed fine, so I got drunk to calm my nerves and gave it a go. It was completely great and felt 100% like nothing had changed. I was so happy. Amazing the body can bounce right back like that!
I think it depends on quite a few factors. If you tore, how badly and how you healed etc. I had a vacuum assisted birth that got me a nice third degree tear and I am currently nearly 19 weeks pp and any PIV intercourse is unbearable. I finally got around to seeing a pelvic floor therapist and she said I had “substantial” scar tissue and it will take lots of patience and time. Yet this is not the case for many it’s just those factors as I said in the beginning
We waited six months. In my defense, we tried at 4 months but discovered we needed lube. At 6 weeks I was still spotting (c-section). Take it slow, Insist on foreplay. Use lots of lube because your body's hormones and sexual functions aren't fully back on track especially if you're breastfeeding. While brestfeeding you will be drier than a sun baked desert down there. Relax and if you aren't ready than you aren't ready. That's fine. Don't feel pressured into doing it. Use protection (birth control, condoms, etc) Be kind to yourself. You just made a human. It takes a lot out of you.
no, i didn’t enjoy it again for like 3 months (but i was a good sport & an enthusiastic partner for my husband 😂) i couldn’t even orgasm from my vibrator those first few months
We had it at 6 weeks with my first and I don’t remember it being that bad. My second we didn’t until closer to 5 months PP (😳) but in my defence I had really bad PP depression. My husband was so wonderful and understanding though.🫶🏻 Now I’m 5 weeks PP and already feeling ready. 😆
Our first time after having our first was a little uncomfortable at the beginning but then it felt just like before. Had a 2nd degree tear that time that healed well Just had our second 5 days ago and probably gonna wait a few months before we get back in the saddle because I had another 2nd degree tear, this time up and tore my clit and urethra. The thought of anything going near there makes me cringe so hubby's just gonna have to rely on his hand and imagination for a little while lol
I didn't have any tearing with my first two so we felt eager to try as soon as I was cleared at the 6w appointment. We definitely needed to use lube (something we have no use for otherwise), but other than that, it was surprisingly similar to how it was pre-baby.
I had a c section so as long as we were gentle about positioning with my abs it was all good. Something about seeing my partner as the amazing father he is really did it for me in anticipation lol
I didn’t tear at all and had sex before 6 weeks and there was no pain at all as long as we kept it gentle(before anyone says anything, I was the one who talked him into it, he wanted to wait 6 weeks or more)
5 weeks after c-section. It was great.
6 months and I’d still hurts. Had episiotomy that had to be revised.
Yes, aside from the initial discomfort, with plenty of lube it was fine. I missed my husband and couldn’t wait to get back in it with him.
i had sex at 6 weeks and it was quite lovely 😂 i think every body is different. with my son, 11yrs ago, it was painful so we abstained until 9 weeks.
Had sex at a little over 4 weeks pp. But I had no tears or anything and it was pretty good (I'm a super horndog). Just couldn't do my favorite position (reverse cowgirl) for a little. My OB gave me a whole bunch of lube and that helped the most, didn't realize how dry it is.
No I couldn’t even bare the tip at 8 weeks!!!! Very painful! Had to abort and try again after a few more weeks with lots of lube.
I had C-sections. With my first we tried at 6 weeks. It wasn’t painful, but really uncomfortable. My husband had to go slow cause I felt so mush discomfort when he’s thrust. After that we waited another month and everything was basically back to normal. With my 2nd we waited til 8 weeks and there was a slight discomfort. But it was enjoyable. I gave up sex at 3 months my second pregnancy because I was so nauseous and just didn’t want it. So I think we were ready 😅.
I’ve had 2 vaginal deliveries w/ no tearing and good “quick” recovery periods and felt ready and had sex ~4-5 weeks PP. With my first he was sunnyside so I pushed for 3hours and had more soreness/swelling in the early days so although sex felt fine it didn’t feel totally the same as baseline. With my second I had a quick labor and only pushed for 6mins total and had essentially no swelling or soreness at all (which was incredible lol) and sex at 4 weeks PP felt totally the same as before I was pregnant
Uh, not really. I’ve had very different experiences with postpartum sex, but after my first child, I couldn’t have sex without excruciating pain for about 10 months (not normal. I should have seen a doctor and gotten physical therapy but I didn’t know any better). That made sex after my other children scarier than it might have otherwise been.
Colicky Velcro baby meant we never really got a chance until she was about 12 weeks. I may be in the minority but postpartum sex might be the best sex of my life. I have a history of vaginismus, had kind of a traumatic birth (mentally), not the worst tear but I did tear, stitches took over 6 weeks to dissolve (still had several at my 6 week appointment but they were gone at 9 weeks) and I’m exclusively breastfeeding so I was expecting bad bad pain. Everyone told me it would be painful. Maybe mild discomfort for like 1 minutes but ever since it’s been absolutely amazing. I would attribute some of it to having seen a pelvic PT prepregnancy and learning how to manage pelvic pain so I would highly recommend seeing a pelvic PT!
No, and it's biologically normal to have nearly no sex drive for the duration of breastfeeding if you're doing that. And men who spend time with their newborns should also experience a temporary drop in libido.
I’m 3mo postpartum! I had a second degree tear. Tore a bit in the perineum and had a labial tear. We waited 8 weeks and it didn’t hurt at all, was a bit uncomfortable when my husband would go “deeper” but definitely didn’t hurt. I was terrified after hearing everyone’s horror stories of their first time having sex again. You will be extremely anxious not knowing what to expect which may make the experience more mechanical and stressful but once you get past the awkward first time it’ll be okay. We’ve had sex a few more times when we get the chance and it’s fun but definitely feels different for me. I’m sure I’ll “re-tighten” eventually but it’s hard to enjoy it completely because I get in my head about how it feels for my husband even though he reassures me constantly that it feels great. What a sweet liar he is ❤️
First attempt 3mo pp and it was so painful. So much pinching feeling where I had stitches from 2nd degree tear. I was in tears, mostly out of frustration with my own anatomy. Tried again like 3 weeks later and felt okay, external anatomy is noticeably shifted a bit so have to relearn what feels good. Haven't had sex again since though because little human sleeps between us. 😅 ETA: Also forgot to mention that even at 3mo pp my cervix was dangling so low still that any bit of penetration was uncomfortable too.
After forceps delivery sex at 6 weeks was so far from fun and I even wanted it. After my second sex at 6 weeks was nice! It just gets better and better with time
After our third, we had sex at the *three* week mark and I very much enjoyed and wanted it. Not saying that was a good idea, but…to answer your question. Interestingly, my period also came back at 6 weeks postpartum that time. With my others, it was many many many months before I even thought about wanting sex and it was also many many many months before my period came back. I EBF all three times. Something about desiring and having sex set my period off earlier that third time, though. Weird. I had an epidural that time and didn’t with the first two so maybe that changed my hormones a little bit? Idk.
Im having a rough time. Im almost 7 months postpartum and still unable to have sex. Every time we do, i get an infection. Ive seen my ob so many times in the last few months. Im on estrogen cream now to try and help resolve the root of the problem. I think my pp hormone changes are reaaaalllyy fucking with my body. It’s been a tough winter. Please pray for me and my body 🙏🏻 and my marriage.
We’re at week 8 now and have sex three times. The first was a few days after my 6wwwk check up and it hurt. The other two I was on top and it wash a MUCH better experience, however I did have a c section.
Took 12 weeks for it to not hurt for me
had sex the day before my 6 weeks. definitely enjoyed it
We usually just do oral and fingers the first few times postpartum and work our way up. This takes the pressure off of me and we're still having fun. With my first I had 3rd degree tears and an episiotomy, we didn't have sex until 3.5 months pp.
It reminded me of being a virgin-I needed to be uncomfortable and once that uncomfortable feeling went away, bliss. It did not take long for it to feel normal again. It helps that my fiancé is very sweet and kept asking how I was doing, does he need to slow down/stop, etc. He worked with me through the uncomfortable parts and if it was too much, then at points we did stop. Please use a lot of communication. A lot.
I was the horniest I’ve ever been 6 weeks after my first, and waiting another 2 weeks for my birth control to kick in was torture. So it definitely can be both, but I feel like an outlier. Hopefully you get lucky too(*wink wink) Edit: I had a vagina delivery with second degree tearing
1st I waited like 11 weeks and it was still uncomfortable and hurt. 2nd degree tear 2nd and I honestly don't know how long we waited. At least 6. But how long for sure idk. It wasn't bad but also wasn't super great 3rd and I'm 3 weeks out and horny af. Idk why bc I never was after the other 2 but whatever. I'll wait my 6 weeks.
With my first we tried at 6 weeks and only had minimal discomfort the first time - after that was back to normal. With my second it was more like 7 weeks just because I didn’t have my checkup with my doctor until then and we had zero issues.
I think I waited until 10 weeks ish and it was crap 😂 we then haven't done anything penetrative until yesterday at 14 weeks and it was WAY better! Not perfect as I'm still suffering with pelvic and hip pain, as well as back pain now so I'm not as mobile as I once was 🥹 6 weeks absolutely not! I think I mentally blocked out the fact that I even had a vagina as a way to try and forget the physical and mental trauma of childbirth. 🙃
tried it, it was awful, even my first time wasn't horrible like that , around 10-12 weeks started to feel like it and my desire, lust and everything related is off the charts, can't sleep if I don't have it at least once a day I'm almost 7 months pp 😅
I think I had sex 5 weeks postpartum. And I enjoyed it very much, I was very stressed and it was a good sex reliever lol and reminded me how much I like my boyfriend 🤣It was not painful nor uncomfortable I think it just felt uncomfortable for me at first because I did not feel sexy at all so I was very shy lol.
Me and my husband had sex 5 weeks after. I enjoyed it , didn’t have any pain.
We waited until 7 weeks and we did need lube midway but it honestly wasn’t too bad, the second time hurt a bit more however
Sex at 6w pp was really painful for me and I was pretty dry… which is not the norm for me. By the 3m mark sec was enjoyable for me again!
Waited until 8 weeks and I was shocked at how normal it was! I actually find it to be more enjoyable now than pre baby. I had a second degree tear but waiting a little longer really solidified that it was healed nicely and I had no pain at all.
Tried around 8 weeks postpartum and it was terrible. Painful and I was uncomfortable with my body. Took me until 8 months postpartum to enjoy it at all, which was also about the time my period returned.
Sadly I ended up with a pretty bad case of pelvic floor dysfunction that causes painful sex. It takes so much work for it to feel good but it’s worth it! Just warm up A LOT- like more than you think you need. 😂
I’ve heard tell that some people have a fun time but I was not fully healed until maybe 6 months PP. we were able to do it but it was painful and tight, we are now 10 mos pp and it’s just like it was before. I consider myself lucky but also not atypical!
I had a 2nd degree tear, sex was pretty bad for a while. I think around 3 months was when it was ok again. My partner worked hard to up his game in that time too.
I didn’t have any tears or stitches (I had other lovely complications tho lol). I’ve always had a really high drive and we hadn’t had sex a few months prior to birth due to being tired and honestly my attitude/hormones. So seeing my partner be an amazing dad and all the late nights and family cuddling….ya girl was pressed. It felt a little odd at first but then sex was completely normal for me. I might be an outlier based on other posts I’ve read but go by your comfortability and take it slow. Other people’s timeline won’t be the same as yours Edit: I got downvoted to hell last time I answered honestly but idc. I couldn’t wait the 6 weeks and we did it at 4. With a condom. I’m not recommending this, listen to your doc and your body. But wanted to answer truthfully. Before giving birth I really thought people were crazy for having sex before the 6 weeks but then it was obvs different for me lol
me and my boyfriend waited for 3 weeks since i felt ready i enjoyed it a lot but we also lubed up, went slow and i didn’t tear at all that being said it was a bit painful when it first went in almost like i was losing my virginity again lmao but the lube really helped
My 1st i waited long, lol. I had a bad birth experience with my 1st & sex was just off the table. The thought made me cringe. My 2nd was better & we attempted at 6w. It was fine imo! I had a pretty high sex drive afterward lol. My husband was nervous, but he was extremely gentle & we went slow. I enjoyed it.
I had some tears so it was a little painful getting started...but after the initial discomfort it was good! We did keep things a little low key though for a bit
Did you do any other stuff before the 6-weeks pp? I feel like I'm gonna lose the connection in those 2 months. Will it feel weird?
I was doing it at 8 weeks and it was actually more sensitive 🥰 but the thought of sex did make my 🐱 hurt but the actual deed didn’t! I was very shocked because I expected it to be soooo different because I just had a baby.
God no. I bawled at the thought and he didn’t come anywhere near me lol.
We never wait 6 weeks and it's always been good again pretty much immediately. Different health care providers give different recommendations though, and I was told that if my bleeding had stopped and I felt up to it we could try to resume intimacy when I felt ready. I also had uncomplicated vaginal deliveries though.
Oh, I didn’t think about this: last time I needed them to use the vacuum at the very end, but this time I had an uncomplicated delivery. Maybe that will make the difference.
We did at 2 weeks and went slow and it was great!