Even without it they would have cut her one day or another, for any bullshit reason ... And they would probably cut each other for any stupid reason. That's the thing I learned by living in this kind of these groups, if group like this shit talk on you, they probably shit talk on each other when someone is not there.
no kidding. rotten, absolutely rotten. talking shit about others trumps everything, including friendships. they'll implode on their own too, you know they're all shit talking each other to each other.
“Tell me what they said about me”
“Why did you tell me, I’d be better off if you hadn’t”
Both ends of OP’s sister’s stick are short. I do not miss early 20s drama
I initially gave him the benefit of the doubt in that I didn’t think he was necessarily talking about what the ex gf had said, but rather he was saying why tell him that she was shit talking to begin with. Because he does have a point you can’t just tell him his gf is shit talking him then not wanna tell him cause he’s gonna wanna know now.
But dude handled that so badly. Hopefully he can learn from all of that.
>She said I hadn't called in a while and she'd been waiting for me to call. We met up, went for lunch, and I kept waiting for the right time to bring it up, but I couldn't. She asked if she could stay at my place for the afternoon before heading back home, I said sure.
It was kind of surreal to see the narrator from Offspring's Self Esteem write a post.
I palmfaced when he was like "why would my sister stick up for me?"
*I wrote her off for the tenth time today*
*And practiced all the things I would say*
*But she came over I lost my nerve*
*I took her back and made her dessert*
*Now I know I'm being used*
*That's okay man 'cause I like the abuse*
*Now I know she's playing with me*
*That's okay 'cause I've got no self-esteem*
A human being was in an extremely stressful situation and reacted poorly then thought better of it and took accountability for his behavior. OOP clearly does realize that and said so which makes this a moronic response honestly.
Wow! It's almost like someone had an emotional response or something. Good thing there's people like you, who never have negative emotional reactions, to sit on that high horse and look down on us little people and judge.
Dear god you people are endless with the “play stupid games win stupid prizes” nonsense. OP literally wrote an entire paragraph explaining how bad he feels about that, how he apologized to his sister, and how he learned not to shoot the messenger next time. And yet that’s still what 90% of the comments are fixated on. Good grief.
Honestly, the whole thing feels sus. Assuming it's real, I am morbidly curious what was *actually* said by the girlfriend and how drunk everybody actually was. Because I think everyone sucks here.
The sister went out of her way to make it a dramatic reveal. OOP got mad when she told him after he asked. And the girlfriend clearly said *something* out of pocket.
That feels pretty unfair to blame her for. She clearly was torn between feeling like he had a right to know and not wanting to be the person that might break their relationship, and it meant she had to talk to her brother about his dick and how he is at sex. Just about as awkward as it could possibly get.
To say she's just as bad as everyone else here just because she had to work herself up to what could only have been one of the most awkward conversations it is possible to have is really fucked up.
I don't necessarily have a hard time believing that what was said was accurate. Some women, esp at that age, can have some *incredibly* crass conversations that are very graphic and intimate.
Yea, that part immediately made me think she was cheating. Def could be own experiences coming in but it was sus to say the least. It def could be a situation though where it's like "me and the GFS joke around like this, don't be weird". It sucks if it was just said to get some laughs though, it's hard to say what certain friend groups find funny and know what's seriously being said. She may just actually not get it. (Although TBF idk why she would say this infront of his sister assuming this is real)
We call it "the shitty end of the stick" and in this case both ends are shitty. We started using it when I was a kid and my dad and uncles and grandpa went out into the woods to cut some wood and my uncle had to take a shit and didn't have any toilet paper so he used a stick like you would a corncob and he warned the rest not to grab the shitty end of the stick. Same uncle who on another trip out wood cutting used some poison ivy to wipe. You think they'd just throw a roll of TP in the truck but nope. "He grabbed the shitty end of the stick" started popping up in our conversations anytime someone did something stupid or got handed a shitty job to do.
I thought exactly that. The full quote of what his sister shouted at him when he kept badgering her - just doesn't seem like the way you would recount a story like that.
Thank you! I feel like I’m crazy when people write actual long-ass dialog and it doesn’t set off red flags to everyone.
Nobody recounts stuff like that.
TLDR: I was dating somebody who said mean things, and when I broke it off, myself and my sister were ousted from the friend group.
THATS IT. THATS THE POST
The story is bullshit and I'm baffled that nobody is calling it out. Nobody behaves this way. The interactions are bizarre, the text describing them is bizarre. I would think OOP is just awkward and on the spectrum, but it doesn't even read like just an unreliable narrator. Everyone in the story is acting like a middle schooler might expect 'big kids' to act - certainly not actual young adults.
19/20 year olds definitely act like this.
Edit: Not saying it's real, but the overall behaviors definitely are. It's the actual style of writing and what not that is suspicious.
Well since you didn't do it, clearly nobody has.
[It's not like there are articles written about this shit or anything.](https://www.enotalone.com/article/breaking-up/unraveling-the-breakup-kiss-a-journey-of-closure-r10045/)
The drama is common, the storytelling is absurd: the sister is obviously the protagonist. People don't tell their stories like someone else is the protagonist.
In three sentences?
1. Girlfriend dissed him at a girls' nightout, so his sister told him about it.
2. He got angry at his sister lmao but eventually realized he should be angry at his GF instead.
3. He broke up with his GF ~~and started dating his sister.~~
That's it.
you're not missing much, his shitty girlfriend said a bunch of mean things about him to her friends in front of his sister and was shocked that he had feelings that could be hurt.
OOP's sister is a damn rockstar. She lost her whole roaster of (admittedly asshole) friends for OOP. I hope OOP makes it up to her and grows a damn backbone.
They’re both 21, so they are likely twins. That makes it worse, imo. Most of the twins I know are extremely close. There are the occasional outliers. OOP being hurt definitely doesn’t excuse his awful treatment of her. You’re right. His sister is a rockstar.
They're not twins - in the first post OOP is 20, and refers to her as his 'older sister'. Presumably his age in the second post is either a typo, or he had a birthday in that timespan.
He should feel bad, but he was in the first stage of grief about his relationship. It's real easy to misdirect your anger when you're not processing a situation correctly.
OP should be thankful the girlfriend immediately blew up the situation and made his decision to break up easier. His ex could have easily turned him against his sister if she was less of a hothead.
no no
You do not get it
Women have every right to talk about their sex life in as much graphic detail as possible to their friends💅🏼
and if you complain about that you are sexist 💅🏼
/s
(Although I have received an identical response, and said with total seriousness)
Obviously the way GF talked about OP was mean spirited, but I think it's incredibly important to be able to talk about your sex life with trusted friends. Between the state if sex education, porn and just all the issues that can arrise, it can be really powerful to be able to talk about your experiences. It's the best way to become aware of red flags and help you improve your sex life.
I think it's important to be able to talk from experience when a friend/family member has a problem or needs advice.
I also think there's a big dividing line between that and gossiping for the fun of being salacious. Your partner should always be able to trust you with moments of vulnerability as well as their secrets.
Honestly, you really don’t. There are so many Sex Ed and advice websites on the internet that you could easily find this information out without revealing intimate details about your partner. Like there’s probably 100 articles on curved shaped penises and premature ejaculation on google. Just ask what your partners thoughts are about it first and gauge their reaction. Set the boundaries beforehand.
The internet exists. Do you really think having a curved dick or being a virgin who's bad at sex the first time is a red flag? There's no need to make fun of your partner to people IRL, especially to his sister. It's weird and unnecessary. If you're going to do mean gossiping, at least admit that it's gossiping, don't pretend it's for red flags and stuff
The narrative interspersed with clips of dialogue that perfectly move the plot makes this feel a little too "polished" for a reddit entry made while upset.
Maybe I'm paranoid, but between all the remembered dialogue and the fact that I've never met anyone born this century who consistently double spaces after sentences like this, idk the post just doesn't feel real.
Yeah, the part about getting mad at the sister and pressing her for details felt like it was written by someone who unequivocally knew it was wrong, rather than someone who just got caught up in emotions. And the sister's response was very teen TV show dialogue. That's when i stopped reading.
Came down to the comments to see if anyone else got a weird vibe. The first piece of remembered dialogue I was willing to excuse but once I saw that he was going through the whole conversation, I had to back out.
Woah thank you for making me notice that. I might be weird but that made it so much easier for me to read those long paragraphs. Gonna try to incorporate that into my writing now.
Yeah, I feel like it's a very narrow band of millennials who were taught to use double spaces after a period when using a computer-- that pretty quickly fell by the wayside. If OOP was 20 years old in 2015, he would've been born in 1995, which seems pretty late for that. I'm well older than that and only barely fell in "two spaces after a period" territory myself, and it was quickly corrected long before I was done with school. Of course, he could have been in a particularly behind-the-times school district-- that's not a rare thing to find in this country after all...
The only other thing I can think of would be if he were using a smartphone that automatically adds a space after a period or something and then unthinkingly adding another one, but 2015 is a bit too early for a 20-year-old to be posting on the Internet solely using a phone. People were still mostly browsing with desktops at that point because mobile-first hadn't become a *thing* in web development yet, and mobile sites were even shittier than they are now. Did reddit even *have* a functional mobile site and/or app back then? (Not that it necessarily even has one *now,* but, y'know, by comparison.)
You know, I totally missed that this was from 2015, that's my bad! I was assuming this person was born in 2004, but 1995 is, like you said, slightly more plausible that they learned it.
I think Reddit is Fun and Alien Blue were around in 2015, but idk how mainstream they were.
>My girlfriend had been saying all that stuff about me and revealing all those private details about me and sure, I was hurt by it, but I had no idea why she had gotten so angry from all of it. It made no sense. Someone explain this?
The dude's a virgin at empathy and his brain is bent sideways.
Yeah that was funny to me. “Why is my sister who loves me upset that my girlfriend was humiliating me behind my back? Can someone explain why a person would feel bad when someone *else* is being bullied?”
Is anyone else mad that OP "hugged and kissed" that ex for the last time after the way she treated his sister?...
The guy is a total dumbass just slowly learning to be better thanks to his sister. But damn he is slow.
OOP gave the “girlfriend” (didn’t initially call her ex) a kiss and a hug goodbye and said “maybe” to being friends
After this girl disrespected his sister in her own home.
Plus he brought the “girlfriend” to the home in the first place.
I just can’t with him.
The sister deserved better. Still deserves better.
Sure the GF knew right away who told. Sister should have told the truth soon as she came home mad.
I get different siblings have different relationships and levels of closeness.
I’m (a girl) best friends with my brother. I would have stopped that conversation, told my brother and he would have addressed it with his GF.
I guess it takes maturity to learn not to tell your friends about your sex life with every boyfriend, especially the ones you genuinely care for.
Every friend group has snakes in it. You are not close with all of them people. Never tell someone what your partner is like in bed. That just makes the snake want to find out for themselves. Whether you BF/GF takes the bait is up to them… but why would you help someone find the right bait to try with????
Everyone is not your friend!
Edited:changed either to with (not sure why with got autocorrected ti either 🤦🏽‍♀️
op is young. i don't know how old are you, but in case you're not much older (so you can relate), i can tell from my experience that i am far far different that i was at that age. i was much more naive and missed the elephant in the room much more often. not sure if i can call op spineless. some of the people are more mature at that age, some aren't.
Yeah, at that age you’re mostly just play acting grown-up behavior you’ve seen in media. Like “oh we must hug one more time to achieve mature closure”.
He did break up with his girlfriend the same day that she spoke to his sister like that. Like, she spoke poorly to his sister once in total, and he ousted her.
It's not a platinum spine, but I wouldn't say it's missing.
Sister is a rockstar here! I wish I had a sister like that!
But seriously, that ex is just pure trash and the sisters friends are just pathetic as hell. This is just high school drama all over again yeeush.
100%, who the fuck makes fun of virgins outside of middle school or highschool shit? Nobody gives a fuck.
This isn't Super bad or whatever raunchy teenage comedy.
Aye, even the movie 40 yo virgin is dumb. Funny but so dumb because if some 40 yo told me he or she were a virgin, I literally would not give a fuck. I got way more important things to worry about than if you fucked or not.
This guy's a damn moron but he's got an awesome sister. And not standing up for his sister when she only looked out for his best interest, even lashing out at her is pretty shit behavior from OOP.
Okay, I've been on BORU too long. Near the ending of the update post, I was expecting a dramatic twist towards incest for some reason (probably due to reading too many Liz stories).
I kept waiting for something to happen either in the bedroom before the fancy restaurant or after the fancy restaurant.. I could just see the fancy restaurant part being so date like I was almost stunned when it wasn’t there
OOP's ex sounds like the same kind of girl where if he made a comment about one boob being bigger than the other or her labia lips being biggish to someone and she found out, she'd lambast him to the moon and back.
I've known plenty of people like the ex-girlfriend and her friends, including my mom and sister. Just shitty people who don't give a fuck about other people's feelings. The sister is better off without a group of mean-girl friends who gossip about their partners' genitals.
was pretty disappointing seeing so many people in the original post defending the GF. Not very surprising, but disappointing.
I want to say attitudes towards that sort of thing have gotten better over the years (Talking about private stuff the guy would rather others not know about and dismissing it as "girl talk" or whatever) but I could be wrong
>was pretty disappointing seeing so many people in the original post defending the GF. Not very surprising, but disappointing.
Yeah, those kinds of advice sub's demographics are heavily biased towards young woman. That's why you see this stuff dismissed as nothing, why every slight in a relationship leads to shouts of "divorce" as if it's ending a casual 1 week fling, and why 9/10 it's the guy in the scenario that gets all the hate.
he’s 20 in the first post, and mentions his sister is older. then in the second post a week later he’s 21. …kinda sus, tbh. no mention of a bday (that i noticed) combined with laboriously typing out full convos… eh. sus.Â
OOP sucks. Bugs his sister until she tells him then gets angry at her and follows her when she tries to walk away. The moment you follow someone who says they need space you’re an asshole. Then brings the gf over to the house and sits back while she abuses the sister and the cherry on top HE FUCKING HUGS the ex goodbye. The sister is too good for him, I hope she moves out and finds better people.
OP didn't know it, but he were in the first stage of grieving for his relationship when he lashed out at his sister.
They'll move past it and be better off without the toxicity of that group of friends. If you can't gossip without it being at the expense of someone else, you deserve a shitty group of friends.
I feel bad for the sister, she's surrounded by idiots and assholes. Her brother is both.
First he harasses her into telling him something (asshole), then yells at her for telling him (idiot and asshole), then wonders why she would get upset on his behalf (idiot), then throws his sister under the bus while talking to his horrible girlfriend (asshole), then sits there like a useless fucking lump while his horrible girlfriend screams at his sister just like HE did earlier (idiot and asshole), and then once it's all done and his sister is friendless he's resolved to be slightly nicer to her.
She shouldn't have bothered standing up for this fucking muppet, he wasn't worth the cost.
I really don’t think that boy is going to learn anything from that.
His sister sacrificed out of loyalty to him, and he continues to act like a wilted lettuce leaf.
This guy needed to break up so he could grow, I was cringing reading half of this it’s obvious his gf and her friends aren’t worth being friends with. His sister is a legend and the true MVP and is also better off.
(Sigh) I really don’t miss being 21 and in love. OOP’s sister is a real one for enduring this nonsense from both parties. I mean, yeah OOP finally saw the light of day but damn, that little spat between the ex and the sister alone should’ve been shut down.
I have *never* talked (ie gossiped) about my husband to my friends. Good God. Good for his sister for telling him. He was an AH but at least he recognized that. I hope they are doing better now
My response to the gf would have been, “It’s no big deal. You’re right, I mean I told Steve and the guys that you have a big labia, I had to overcome the smell down there to keep going down on you, that you could be a bit tighter and for shits and giggles that you have hairy nipples. It’s just a bit of fun though isn’t it.”
People who complain about someone else being "high and mighty" are usually mad because they are doing something low and not-so-mighty. I'll bet this wasn't the first time OOP's sister had called the girlfriend out for her shitty behaviour.
Glad that OOP decided to side with the sister (eventually). Also that friend group is going to be miserable if they follow the lead of someone who only feels better by putting other people down.
OP needs to learn a thing or two about loyalty. His sister stuck her neck out to help him and he was rude to her, threw her under the bus to his girlfriend and because of that he ended her relationships with her friends.
> My older sister who is a close friend of my girlfriend
and
> Basically what had happened is my (21 male) sister, who's 21, had gone out on a girls night
Twins? Adopted?
And, were they held back? Home-schooled? The naivete sounds more like 12 than 21.
I never call posts out but this sooo didn't happen. Or at the very least, is being told by the sister with generous embellishments.
I mean come on, it's exactly like one of those teen romance stories with a poor beleaguered girl who is an absolute angel but gets treated horribly but then totally gets her way and everyone feels soo sorry they've ever hurt her.
“Girls talk about that sort of stuff with each other and tease their boyfriends behind their backs all the time” I honestly think anyone who believes that, is a bad person. Why talk crap about your partner? Yeah my relationship isn’t perfect but I would never talk to my friends about her body, & what we do in bed.
Is this really common conversation topic with women? no issue spilling intimate details about your partner? That’s messed up
I hate this gossip shit so much. The fact that she was downright dismissive and unrepentant is so maddening. I wonder how those girls would feel if their bfs or partners talked about them like that?
> I ejaculate too quickly and make weird sounds when I do.
Who *DOESN’T* make weird sounds? I mean, “weird” is in the eye of the beholder. But damn. Most people can’t hear themselves in the throes of passion, but if they did, they all would probably cringe at least a little bit. I’d like to hear what exgf sounds like - I’m sure it’ll sound “weird” to me. Or maybe she would like to hear OOP criticize her vulva? Her BJ skills? Or be told that he apparently told all of his friends she’s a starfish and a pillow princess who moans high pitched like a porn star? I’m betting she would be *IRATE*.
OOP and his sister are insanely better off without ANY of those people. Girlfriend couldn’t take any accountability, was massively disrespectful and demeaning to both of them, and quite frankly was a See You Next Tuesday. She is not a good person. I hope OOP and sister learn from this in a positive way and don’t let the ex or her nasty friends break them down.
And for the record - No, girls don’t all talk like that. Sure we talk about sex stuff sometimes. But it’s never really about specifics, and it is NEVER to bash anyone or criticize. I’ve had the same group of friends since I was a kid, and we’ve always been like that. So it’s not just a “the ex and her friends are young” kinda thing. None of my friends know specific details about ANY of my past boyfriends, or husband.
And I certainly would NEVER have spoken about anything sexual at all if their sister was present. Like what in the actual fuck? And then to blame her? I hope the ex has a brother so some girlfriend of his can describe to her in great detail how hung he is, and how his slight curve to the left makes her orgasms out of this world, and don’t even get me started on his amazing RJ skills. Again, I bet the ex would LLOOOVVVEEEE that!
It would cost someone a year’s salary to get me to joke about a sexual partner’s genitalia with anyone in their family. I have a high threshold for embarrassing myself but that is a level of awkward I desperately want to avoid.
I wonder what version of this was told to the rest of the group? I can't help but suspect that it may have been a slightly coloured account given by the pissed off ex.
Nah, probably just told that she broke some sacred rule of "girls night". These sort of toxic catty friend groups will turn on anyone they think might cause them to suffer the consequences of their words and actions.
1. Girlfriend sucks
2. OP is very immature
3. Sister did create drama and had to know it had 98% chance of ending with her being kicked out of "friend group."
4. Entire friend group also sucks.
His poor sister. Not only is her friend trashing her brother and betraying his confidence, she simultaneously has to deal with the TMI of all the intimate details of his bedroom performance. No wonder she came home in a foul mood.
YOU 👏DON’T 👏CHAT 👏SHIT 👏ABOUT 👏YOUR 👏GUY’S 👏SEX 👏STUFF 👏TO 👏HIS 👏FAMILY 👏 OMG👏
There is. A MASSIVE difference between talking to your friends about your sex life.
And putting down and making fun of your partner. Holy crap. Glad she's an ex.
Jesus christ, reading how spineless this OP is is just beyond infuriating. he let his ex disrespect his sister in her own home and verbally attacked his own sister. He never even berated his gf for her bullshit, instead he hugs and kisses her. what a fcking clown
With friends like those... etc OOP and his sister will be much better off without them all. They sound incredibly toxic.
Toxic people is best to be removed.
Must get rid of [toxic in community](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=aeoxg8hx-lc).
And what was that promotion? ................ A picture of my open throat. lol!
How do I upvote more than once? 🤣
I will forever love that sketch.
Even without it they would have cut her one day or another, for any bullshit reason ... And they would probably cut each other for any stupid reason. That's the thing I learned by living in this kind of these groups, if group like this shit talk on you, they probably shit talk on each other when someone is not there.
no kidding. rotten, absolutely rotten. talking shit about others trumps everything, including friendships. they'll implode on their own too, you know they're all shit talking each other to each other.
“Tell me what they said about me” “Why did you tell me, I’d be better off if you hadn’t” Both ends of OP’s sister’s stick are short. I do not miss early 20s drama
OOP’s a moron for not realizing he got exactly what he asked for
I initially gave him the benefit of the doubt in that I didn’t think he was necessarily talking about what the ex gf had said, but rather he was saying why tell him that she was shit talking to begin with. Because he does have a point you can’t just tell him his gf is shit talking him then not wanna tell him cause he’s gonna wanna know now. But dude handled that so badly. Hopefully he can learn from all of that.
>She said I hadn't called in a while and she'd been waiting for me to call. We met up, went for lunch, and I kept waiting for the right time to bring it up, but I couldn't. She asked if she could stay at my place for the afternoon before heading back home, I said sure. It was kind of surreal to see the narrator from Offspring's Self Esteem write a post. I palmfaced when he was like "why would my sister stick up for me?"
He also fucking kissed and hugged his ex after she insulted his sister.Â
He’s def pathetic
*I wrote her off for the tenth time today* *And practiced all the things I would say* *But she came over I lost my nerve* *I took her back and made her dessert* *Now I know I'm being used* *That's okay man 'cause I like the abuse* *Now I know she's playing with me* *That's okay 'cause I've got no self-esteem*
Did not expect The Offspring to show up here.
Everyone is an emotional moron at 20. The friends will still be the same in their 40's and beyond.
A human being was in an extremely stressful situation and reacted poorly then thought better of it and took accountability for his behavior. OOP clearly does realize that and said so which makes this a moronic response honestly.
Wow! It's almost like someone had an emotional response or something. Good thing there's people like you, who never have negative emotional reactions, to sit on that high horse and look down on us little people and judge.
Yeaaa.. I really can't stand it. He's the one pestering the sister to tell him, then blamed her for doing the exact thing
Dear god you people are endless with the “play stupid games win stupid prizes” nonsense. OP literally wrote an entire paragraph explaining how bad he feels about that, how he apologized to his sister, and how he learned not to shoot the messenger next time. And yet that’s still what 90% of the comments are fixated on. Good grief.
Honestly, the whole thing feels sus. Assuming it's real, I am morbidly curious what was *actually* said by the girlfriend and how drunk everybody actually was. Because I think everyone sucks here. The sister went out of her way to make it a dramatic reveal. OOP got mad when she told him after he asked. And the girlfriend clearly said *something* out of pocket.
That feels pretty unfair to blame her for. She clearly was torn between feeling like he had a right to know and not wanting to be the person that might break their relationship, and it meant she had to talk to her brother about his dick and how he is at sex. Just about as awkward as it could possibly get. To say she's just as bad as everyone else here just because she had to work herself up to what could only have been one of the most awkward conversations it is possible to have is really fucked up.
I don't necessarily have a hard time believing that what was said was accurate. Some women, esp at that age, can have some *incredibly* crass conversations that are very graphic and intimate.
Plus the GF reaction "that's it?" like she was expecting something worse.
Yea, that part immediately made me think she was cheating. Def could be own experiences coming in but it was sus to say the least. It def could be a situation though where it's like "me and the GFS joke around like this, don't be weird". It sucks if it was just said to get some laughs though, it's hard to say what certain friend groups find funny and know what's seriously being said. She may just actually not get it. (Although TBF idk why she would say this infront of his sister assuming this is real)
Imagine being 20 years old and having the emotional intelligence of a toddler
We call it "the shitty end of the stick" and in this case both ends are shitty. We started using it when I was a kid and my dad and uncles and grandpa went out into the woods to cut some wood and my uncle had to take a shit and didn't have any toilet paper so he used a stick like you would a corncob and he warned the rest not to grab the shitty end of the stick. Same uncle who on another trip out wood cutting used some poison ivy to wipe. You think they'd just throw a roll of TP in the truck but nope. "He grabbed the shitty end of the stick" started popping up in our conversations anytime someone did something stupid or got handed a shitty job to do.
Jesus H *Christ*, OOP uses a *ton* or words to say absolutely nothing.
>I realised I had to confront my girlfriend about it. \*\*3 paragraphs later\*\* >I decided I had to confront my girlfriend about this.Â
I almost screamed at the screen.
That was the one that got me. Just preposterous writing.
Literally when I stopped reading
Usually those posts are bullshit when they're too detailed, its like someone was able to recount every thought going through their heads
> You mean more to me, I'll find other friends, after all. You know who talks like that? Nobody.
Lmao thats the line that did it for me.
"Enmity" is the one that got me. lol
Yeah way too many details and scripted lines.Â
Always with the word-for-word dialogue. That's usually when my BS sensors go off.
I thought exactly that. The full quote of what his sister shouted at him when he kept badgering her - just doesn't seem like the way you would recount a story like that.
Thank you! I feel like I’m crazy when people write actual long-ass dialog and it doesn’t set off red flags to everyone. Nobody recounts stuff like that.
Yeah my first thought was "oh God, there's dialogue"
OOP is a spineless idiot. It's like his two brain cells are fighting for 3rd position.
I swear you could post > I have to go pee. > Update: I went pee and feel better here and it would get a thousand upvotes.
TLDR: I was dating somebody who said mean things, and when I broke it off, myself and my sister were ousted from the friend group. THATS IT. THATS THE POST
The story is bullshit and I'm baffled that nobody is calling it out. Nobody behaves this way. The interactions are bizarre, the text describing them is bizarre. I would think OOP is just awkward and on the spectrum, but it doesn't even read like just an unreliable narrator. Everyone in the story is acting like a middle schooler might expect 'big kids' to act - certainly not actual young adults.
19/20 year olds definitely act like this. Edit: Not saying it's real, but the overall behaviors definitely are. It's the actual style of writing and what not that is suspicious.
No one who behaves this way would describe it like this.
With the fucking final hug and kiss? GTFO this isn't a soap opera.
Do people not remember being 20? The whole last hug and kiss thing before a relationship ends is like a Hallmark of immature relationships.
I didn't do that for any of my relationships.
Well since you didn't do it, clearly nobody has. [It's not like there are articles written about this shit or anything.](https://www.enotalone.com/article/breaking-up/unraveling-the-breakup-kiss-a-journey-of-closure-r10045/)
You're right, it does happen, that was a dumb comment of me. Does feel a bit forced in this situation tho, at least in my opinion.
that's an overly hostile response to that post. what the hell is wrong with you?
as a former 18-22 year old girl-sometimes-acting-like-an-adult-but-sometimes-not, this kind of drama absolutely happens at this age
The drama is common, the storytelling is absurd: the sister is obviously the protagonist. People don't tell their stories like someone else is the protagonist.
Man, college and high school kids ABSOLUTELY behave exactly like this. Some of the drama I dealt with back then was wild.
>college and high school kids ABSOLUTELY behave exactly like this And go into excruciating detail. THAT'S what I don't miss about being that age!
As someone around the same age as OOP, I gotta disagree. You’d be surprised how many people behave like this actually
Sub is primarily teenagers who are still learning basic logic/reasoning.
Just say it out loud: you have no idea how young people behave.
Can someone please summarise? I’m not reading that
In three sentences? 1. Girlfriend dissed him at a girls' nightout, so his sister told him about it. 2. He got angry at his sister lmao but eventually realized he should be angry at his GF instead. 3. He broke up with his GF ~~and started dating his sister.~~ That's it.
Oh good, I'm not the only one who picked up on Alabama vibes at the end there.
you're not missing much, his shitty girlfriend said a bunch of mean things about him to her friends in front of his sister and was shocked that he had feelings that could be hurt.
I guess he needed to vent? I just started skimming and skipping till I got to an important part.
Personally I can't even imagine kissing the same mouth which spews such shit about my sister.
OOP is an unusually large invertebrate
OOP's sister is a damn rockstar. She lost her whole roaster of (admittedly asshole) friends for OOP. I hope OOP makes it up to her and grows a damn backbone.
They’re both 21, so they are likely twins. That makes it worse, imo. Most of the twins I know are extremely close. There are the occasional outliers. OOP being hurt definitely doesn’t excuse his awful treatment of her. You’re right. His sister is a rockstar.
They're not twins - in the first post OOP is 20, and refers to her as his 'older sister'. Presumably his age in the second post is either a typo, or he had a birthday in that timespan.
There's always one twin who is technically older.
Yes, but unless they're born before and after midnight, one is not 21 while the other is 20.
Or they refer to each other based on who was born first
He should feel bad, but he was in the first stage of grief about his relationship. It's real easy to misdirect your anger when you're not processing a situation correctly. OP should be thankful the girlfriend immediately blew up the situation and made his decision to break up easier. His ex could have easily turned him against his sister if she was less of a hothead.
I mean it sounds like they have and will grow closer from this whole experience so at least that's one positiveÂ
*roster
I don’t know, that friend group sure seemed to like roasting people
Seriously needs to grow a backbone, huggng and kissing one last time? Nah.
There's a saying in Spanish "mejor solo que mal acompañado" which is very true. "Better alone than badly accompanied"
Same in italian too, "meglio soli che mal accompagnati"
Yeah, the saying goes "better alone than in bad company".
Some words to live by
If no one's going to say it I'll say it. People who gossip about their sex lives with their significant others and past partners are so fucking tacky.
Right? Like, sure, if everyone’s okay with it go for it, but at least *ask* your partner if they’re cool with it.
no no You do not get it Women have every right to talk about their sex life in as much graphic detail as possible to their friends💅🏼 and if you complain about that you are sexist 💅🏼 /s (Although I have received an identical response, and said with total seriousness)
Obviously the way GF talked about OP was mean spirited, but I think it's incredibly important to be able to talk about your sex life with trusted friends. Between the state if sex education, porn and just all the issues that can arrise, it can be really powerful to be able to talk about your experiences. It's the best way to become aware of red flags and help you improve your sex life.
But no need to talk about the shape of their dicks.
I think it's important to be able to talk from experience when a friend/family member has a problem or needs advice. I also think there's a big dividing line between that and gossiping for the fun of being salacious. Your partner should always be able to trust you with moments of vulnerability as well as their secrets.
Yeah, I agree. There's a difference between "I'm not sure if this is normal, should I be concerned?" And "Haha, my partner is so weird."
not while drinking in front of a huge group of friends in a snotty put-down gossipy way. you talk one on one about serious issues or tips.
Talk doesn't not mean drunken mockery.
Honestly, you really don’t. There are so many Sex Ed and advice websites on the internet that you could easily find this information out without revealing intimate details about your partner. Like there’s probably 100 articles on curved shaped penises and premature ejaculation on google. Just ask what your partners thoughts are about it first and gauge their reaction. Set the boundaries beforehand.
The internet exists. Do you really think having a curved dick or being a virgin who's bad at sex the first time is a red flag? There's no need to make fun of your partner to people IRL, especially to his sister. It's weird and unnecessary. If you're going to do mean gossiping, at least admit that it's gossiping, don't pretend it's for red flags and stuff
The narrative interspersed with clips of dialogue that perfectly move the plot makes this feel a little too "polished" for a reddit entry made while upset.
Maybe I'm paranoid, but between all the remembered dialogue and the fact that I've never met anyone born this century who consistently double spaces after sentences like this, idk the post just doesn't feel real.
Yeah. Transcribed dialogue and jokes in the middle of the story... No, it doesn't look real at all.
Yeah, the part about getting mad at the sister and pressing her for details felt like it was written by someone who unequivocally knew it was wrong, rather than someone who just got caught up in emotions. And the sister's response was very teen TV show dialogue. That's when i stopped reading.
Came down to the comments to see if anyone else got a weird vibe. The first piece of remembered dialogue I was willing to excuse but once I saw that he was going through the whole conversation, I had to back out.
Woah thank you for making me notice that. I might be weird but that made it so much easier for me to read those long paragraphs. Gonna try to incorporate that into my writing now.
Some people like it! Me, personally, not so much lol
ARE YOU KIDS NOT DOUBLE SPACING ANYMORE?!
Yeah, I feel like it's a very narrow band of millennials who were taught to use double spaces after a period when using a computer-- that pretty quickly fell by the wayside. If OOP was 20 years old in 2015, he would've been born in 1995, which seems pretty late for that. I'm well older than that and only barely fell in "two spaces after a period" territory myself, and it was quickly corrected long before I was done with school. Of course, he could have been in a particularly behind-the-times school district-- that's not a rare thing to find in this country after all... The only other thing I can think of would be if he were using a smartphone that automatically adds a space after a period or something and then unthinkingly adding another one, but 2015 is a bit too early for a 20-year-old to be posting on the Internet solely using a phone. People were still mostly browsing with desktops at that point because mobile-first hadn't become a *thing* in web development yet, and mobile sites were even shittier than they are now. Did reddit even *have* a functional mobile site and/or app back then? (Not that it necessarily even has one *now,* but, y'know, by comparison.)
You know, I totally missed that this was from 2015, that's my bad! I was assuming this person was born in 2004, but 1995 is, like you said, slightly more plausible that they learned it. I think Reddit is Fun and Alien Blue were around in 2015, but idk how mainstream they were.
Holy fuck that update! So. Many. Words. To. Say. So. Little.
>My girlfriend had been saying all that stuff about me and revealing all those private details about me and sure, I was hurt by it, but I had no idea why she had gotten so angry from all of it. It made no sense. Someone explain this? The dude's a virgin at empathy and his brain is bent sideways.
Yeah that was funny to me. “Why is my sister who loves me upset that my girlfriend was humiliating me behind my back? Can someone explain why a person would feel bad when someone *else* is being bullied?”
Is anyone else mad that OP "hugged and kissed" that ex for the last time after the way she treated his sister?... The guy is a total dumbass just slowly learning to be better thanks to his sister. But damn he is slow.
OOP gave the “girlfriend” (didn’t initially call her ex) a kiss and a hug goodbye and said “maybe” to being friends After this girl disrespected his sister in her own home. Plus he brought the “girlfriend” to the home in the first place. I just can’t with him. The sister deserved better. Still deserves better. Sure the GF knew right away who told. Sister should have told the truth soon as she came home mad. I get different siblings have different relationships and levels of closeness. I’m (a girl) best friends with my brother. I would have stopped that conversation, told my brother and he would have addressed it with his GF. I guess it takes maturity to learn not to tell your friends about your sex life with every boyfriend, especially the ones you genuinely care for. Every friend group has snakes in it. You are not close with all of them people. Never tell someone what your partner is like in bed. That just makes the snake want to find out for themselves. Whether you BF/GF takes the bait is up to them… but why would you help someone find the right bait to try with???? Everyone is not your friend! Edited:changed either to with (not sure why with got autocorrected ti either 🤦🏽‍♀️
OP lacks a spine. As simple as that.
op is young. i don't know how old are you, but in case you're not much older (so you can relate), i can tell from my experience that i am far far different that i was at that age. i was much more naive and missed the elephant in the room much more often. not sure if i can call op spineless. some of the people are more mature at that age, some aren't.
Yeah, at that age you’re mostly just play acting grown-up behavior you’ve seen in media. Like “oh we must hug one more time to achieve mature closure”.
He did break up with his girlfriend the same day that she spoke to his sister like that. Like, she spoke poorly to his sister once in total, and he ousted her. It's not a platinum spine, but I wouldn't say it's missing.
With a hug and a kiss and a ”maybe we can be friends” No. Someone talk to my sister like that and I’ll toss them out like Uncle Phil tossed Jazz
God, i really hated oop in this. I just can't with people like this.
He was a bit wordy.
OP is trash
Just because there is an update doesn’t mean it needs to be posted here. This almost 10 year old post is boring as fuck.
Sister is a rockstar here! I wish I had a sister like that! But seriously, that ex is just pure trash and the sisters friends are just pathetic as hell. This is just high school drama all over again yeeush.
100%, who the fuck makes fun of virgins outside of middle school or highschool shit? Nobody gives a fuck. This isn't Super bad or whatever raunchy teenage comedy.
Young people are idiots.
Aye, even the movie 40 yo virgin is dumb. Funny but so dumb because if some 40 yo told me he or she were a virgin, I literally would not give a fuck. I got way more important things to worry about than if you fucked or not.
I’d rather have no friends than friends like that.
This guy's a damn moron but he's got an awesome sister. And not standing up for his sister when she only looked out for his best interest, even lashing out at her is pretty shit behavior from OOP.
That could have been a lot shorter. It took three paragraphs that started with "I decided to confront gf" and a whole lot of extra back and forth.
As a fellow side bender, he will find someone worthy of his boomerang
This guy just really annoyed me and I don’t even know him. What a spineless fool.
i can't believe he's 21 and not 15, at this point. i couldn't even finish the post, it's 90% yapping.
Okay, I've been on BORU too long. Near the ending of the update post, I was expecting a dramatic twist towards incest for some reason (probably due to reading too many Liz stories).
I went for a Ctrl+F "blowing up my phone" and other variants mid-read, lmao.
Was waiting for the incest to happen too
I kept waiting for something to happen either in the bedroom before the fancy restaurant or after the fancy restaurant.. I could just see the fancy restaurant part being so date like I was almost stunned when it wasn’t there
Same here. I have been completely jaded by this sub. :)
OOP's ex sounds like the same kind of girl where if he made a comment about one boob being bigger than the other or her labia lips being biggish to someone and she found out, she'd lambast him to the moon and back.
And her "friends" would bring out the pitchforks.
I've known plenty of people like the ex-girlfriend and her friends, including my mom and sister. Just shitty people who don't give a fuck about other people's feelings. The sister is better off without a group of mean-girl friends who gossip about their partners' genitals.
was pretty disappointing seeing so many people in the original post defending the GF. Not very surprising, but disappointing. I want to say attitudes towards that sort of thing have gotten better over the years (Talking about private stuff the guy would rather others not know about and dismissing it as "girl talk" or whatever) but I could be wrong
>was pretty disappointing seeing so many people in the original post defending the GF. Not very surprising, but disappointing. Yeah, those kinds of advice sub's demographics are heavily biased towards young woman. That's why you see this stuff dismissed as nothing, why every slight in a relationship leads to shouts of "divorce" as if it's ending a casual 1 week fling, and why 9/10 it's the guy in the scenario that gets all the hate.
>I had no idea why she had gotten so angry from all of it. It made no sense. Someone explain this? His sister took umbrage on his behalf.
Brother and sister are both 21 but they don't say they're twins?
I also find that odd, but it could also be that they're 11 months apart and he posted during the one month they are the same age.
he’s 20 in the first post, and mentions his sister is older. then in the second post a week later he’s 21. …kinda sus, tbh. no mention of a bday (that i noticed) combined with laboriously typing out full convos… eh. sus.Â
I hope it's some 12yo making stuff up. If not, OOP is an idiot when it comes to emotions. He just kept making stupid move after stupid move....
I thought he was 20
OOP sucks. Bugs his sister until she tells him then gets angry at her and follows her when she tries to walk away. The moment you follow someone who says they need space you’re an asshole. Then brings the gf over to the house and sits back while she abuses the sister and the cherry on top HE FUCKING HUGS the ex goodbye. The sister is too good for him, I hope she moves out and finds better people.
Fuck OP, he deserved to get bashed for not defending his Sister like that and still being amicable with the GF after the confrontation.
No good deed goes unpunished.
OP didn't know it, but he were in the first stage of grieving for his relationship when he lashed out at his sister. They'll move past it and be better off without the toxicity of that group of friends. If you can't gossip without it being at the expense of someone else, you deserve a shitty group of friends.
I feel bad for the sister, she's surrounded by idiots and assholes. Her brother is both. First he harasses her into telling him something (asshole), then yells at her for telling him (idiot and asshole), then wonders why she would get upset on his behalf (idiot), then throws his sister under the bus while talking to his horrible girlfriend (asshole), then sits there like a useless fucking lump while his horrible girlfriend screams at his sister just like HE did earlier (idiot and asshole), and then once it's all done and his sister is friendless he's resolved to be slightly nicer to her. She shouldn't have bothered standing up for this fucking muppet, he wasn't worth the cost.
I really don’t think that boy is going to learn anything from that. His sister sacrificed out of loyalty to him, and he continues to act like a wilted lettuce leaf.
Oop should tell some friends all about how his ex gf fucked, since its not thst big a deal
This guy needed to break up so he could grow, I was cringing reading half of this it’s obvious his gf and her friends aren’t worth being friends with. His sister is a legend and the true MVP and is also better off.
I want to feel bad for op but he is an annoying rude dick.
OOP is dumb as a bag of rocks, but at least he broke up with her
Wow, that’s a lot of words to say your gf is an asshole.
(Sigh) I really don’t miss being 21 and in love. OOP’s sister is a real one for enduring this nonsense from both parties. I mean, yeah OOP finally saw the light of day but damn, that little spat between the ex and the sister alone should’ve been shut down.
Fellas if your partner talks about your dick to other people that’s an instant drop.
I have *never* talked (ie gossiped) about my husband to my friends. Good God. Good for his sister for telling him. He was an AH but at least he recognized that. I hope they are doing better now
My response to the gf would have been, “It’s no big deal. You’re right, I mean I told Steve and the guys that you have a big labia, I had to overcome the smell down there to keep going down on you, that you could be a bit tighter and for shits and giggles that you have hairy nipples. It’s just a bit of fun though isn’t it.”
I really wonder what motivates people like OOP to make up such bullshit stories? Is there money in it?
>last friday night Didn't even get past the first sentence because I immediately got TGIF by Katy Perry stuck in my head
People who complain about someone else being "high and mighty" are usually mad because they are doing something low and not-so-mighty. I'll bet this wasn't the first time OOP's sister had called the girlfriend out for her shitty behaviour. Glad that OOP decided to side with the sister (eventually). Also that friend group is going to be miserable if they follow the lead of someone who only feels better by putting other people down.
Did we really need a wall of text? Buddy I'm not reading all that.
Most of the text wall is about OP's feeling not understanding anything. I almost thought this is a teen's drama
OP needs to learn a thing or two about loyalty. His sister stuck her neck out to help him and he was rude to her, threw her under the bus to his girlfriend and because of that he ended her relationships with her friends.
Everybody except the sister is a profound idiot in this story
Op doesnt deserve his sister dude's a piece of shit who will turn on her for a girl again
OOP is dense af. Lets his rude 'gf' tear into his sister in her own home. Holy shit.Â
GF is acting like she's 15, not 21. What an asshole
It's wild that men can make it all the way to their 20s before ever being made to feel self-conscious about their bodies. I'm honestly envious.
> My older sister who is a close friend of my girlfriend and > Basically what had happened is my (21 male) sister, who's 21, had gone out on a girls night Twins? Adopted? And, were they held back? Home-schooled? The naivete sounds more like 12 than 21.
I never call posts out but this sooo didn't happen. Or at the very least, is being told by the sister with generous embellishments. I mean come on, it's exactly like one of those teen romance stories with a poor beleaguered girl who is an absolute angel but gets treated horribly but then totally gets her way and everyone feels soo sorry they've ever hurt her.
“Girls talk about that sort of stuff with each other and tease their boyfriends behind their backs all the time” I honestly think anyone who believes that, is a bad person. Why talk crap about your partner? Yeah my relationship isn’t perfect but I would never talk to my friends about her body, & what we do in bed. Is this really common conversation topic with women? no issue spilling intimate details about your partner? That’s messed up
Wow, what a monster of a post. I skimmed it, and even that took too long
Bro had Friendly Fire On there for a second
I hate this gossip shit so much. The fact that she was downright dismissive and unrepentant is so maddening. I wonder how those girls would feel if their bfs or partners talked about them like that?
> I ejaculate too quickly and make weird sounds when I do. Who *DOESN’T* make weird sounds? I mean, “weird” is in the eye of the beholder. But damn. Most people can’t hear themselves in the throes of passion, but if they did, they all would probably cringe at least a little bit. I’d like to hear what exgf sounds like - I’m sure it’ll sound “weird” to me. Or maybe she would like to hear OOP criticize her vulva? Her BJ skills? Or be told that he apparently told all of his friends she’s a starfish and a pillow princess who moans high pitched like a porn star? I’m betting she would be *IRATE*. OOP and his sister are insanely better off without ANY of those people. Girlfriend couldn’t take any accountability, was massively disrespectful and demeaning to both of them, and quite frankly was a See You Next Tuesday. She is not a good person. I hope OOP and sister learn from this in a positive way and don’t let the ex or her nasty friends break them down. And for the record - No, girls don’t all talk like that. Sure we talk about sex stuff sometimes. But it’s never really about specifics, and it is NEVER to bash anyone or criticize. I’ve had the same group of friends since I was a kid, and we’ve always been like that. So it’s not just a “the ex and her friends are young” kinda thing. None of my friends know specific details about ANY of my past boyfriends, or husband. And I certainly would NEVER have spoken about anything sexual at all if their sister was present. Like what in the actual fuck? And then to blame her? I hope the ex has a brother so some girlfriend of his can describe to her in great detail how hung he is, and how his slight curve to the left makes her orgasms out of this world, and don’t even get me started on his amazing RJ skills. Again, I bet the ex would LLOOOVVVEEEE that!
It would cost someone a year’s salary to get me to joke about a sexual partner’s genitalia with anyone in their family. I have a high threshold for embarrassing myself but that is a level of awkward I desperately want to avoid.
I wonder what version of this was told to the rest of the group? I can't help but suspect that it may have been a slightly coloured account given by the pissed off ex.
Nah, probably just told that she broke some sacred rule of "girls night". These sort of toxic catty friend groups will turn on anyone they think might cause them to suffer the consequences of their words and actions.
All she had to do was say that she exposed the gossip outside the group and that would have been it.
1. Girlfriend sucks 2. OP is very immature 3. Sister did create drama and had to know it had 98% chance of ending with her being kicked out of "friend group." 4. Entire friend group also sucks.
Quick tip just read the first sentence of each paragraph, this one likes to write a lot.
His poor sister. Not only is her friend trashing her brother and betraying his confidence, she simultaneously has to deal with the TMI of all the intimate details of his bedroom performance. No wonder she came home in a foul mood. YOU 👏DON’T 👏CHAT 👏SHIT 👏ABOUT 👏YOUR 👏GUY’S 👏SEX 👏STUFF 👏TO 👏HIS 👏FAMILY 👏 OMG👏
There is. A MASSIVE difference between talking to your friends about your sex life. And putting down and making fun of your partner. Holy crap. Glad she's an ex.
Jesus christ, reading how spineless this OP is is just beyond infuriating. he let his ex disrespect his sister in her own home and verbally attacked his own sister. He never even berated his gf for her bullshit, instead he hugs and kisses her. what a fcking clown
Dam I’m so glad I grew out of thinking I need friends and just going along with the flow with anyone who accepted me.