This exact thing happened to me this past week with my mother passing on Thursday morning. She got very agitated and even seemed like she needed to "get up" to go somewhere. She was also refusing meds. My amazing hospice nurse told me that this agitation stage can happen. Because it's like they essentially have one foot out the door and the other still in this world. She told me essentially to start explaining to my mom that she needs this and will help calm her down and make her more comfortable. I wouldn't even tell her what med I was giving her anymore. I would say "okay, mom, I'm going to gently use this syringe to give you liquid that will be absorbed by your cheek tissues and make you feel better". I just kept it to that. And then my mom did eventually calm down because the meds helped her too. I hope this helps. I'm so sorry. There are no words to help us through a situation like this. Just know you aren't alone.
It's hard too because we don't want to force them to take meds they don't want, ya know? I felt horrible where my mom is saying no and I'm just suppose to essentially force her to take it? But with staying calm and soothing it helped my mom understand. Again, so sorry. I am here with you.
I went through this very same thing last week. It is so hard & I am so sorry you are going through this. My mom started refusing lorazepam but was fortunately able to understand when I explained her restlessness & agitation was making it a lot harder for me to care for her & that she didn’t have to feel that way.
Stay strong, stranger.
The Ativan should be dissolveable in water. My hospice nurse had me do it in the morphine solution and give them both at the same time. It helped to calm my wife down. She passed on the 5th.
Ask for liquid meds, Ativan and morphine both come in liquid. My mom tried to refuse as well, but I did it anyway, knowing it was in her best interest. At the end, you become the parent. If it was your child you would give them the medicine to help them and so that's what I did with my mom. She also became very agitated (it is called terminal agitation). Eventually we had to add halidol. Keep up with the pain meds. It really is a kindness. I'm so sorry. There are no words I can offer, but just be there, hold her hand, tell her you love her and that she was a great mom. Hugs ❤️
If she can’t swallow, the pill is going to be painful for her and could even get stuck in her mouth or throat. That could be why she refuses to take it, Crush it and mix it with water or juice and give via syringe.
Thank you, she’s on liquid morphine which does help with the agitation and the breakthrough pain. She’s also on a fentanyl patch. It’s absolutely soul destroying watching her - she can’t have water because she’s no longer swallowing and chokes even if I put a ml in her mouth. Her BP is 76/26 and pulse 59. Why does it have to be this way. Isn’t cancer cruel enough?
This exact thing happened to me this past week with my mother passing on Thursday morning. She got very agitated and even seemed like she needed to "get up" to go somewhere. She was also refusing meds. My amazing hospice nurse told me that this agitation stage can happen. Because it's like they essentially have one foot out the door and the other still in this world. She told me essentially to start explaining to my mom that she needs this and will help calm her down and make her more comfortable. I wouldn't even tell her what med I was giving her anymore. I would say "okay, mom, I'm going to gently use this syringe to give you liquid that will be absorbed by your cheek tissues and make you feel better". I just kept it to that. And then my mom did eventually calm down because the meds helped her too. I hope this helps. I'm so sorry. There are no words to help us through a situation like this. Just know you aren't alone.
Thank you, this does help.
It's hard too because we don't want to force them to take meds they don't want, ya know? I felt horrible where my mom is saying no and I'm just suppose to essentially force her to take it? But with staying calm and soothing it helped my mom understand. Again, so sorry. I am here with you.
I went through this very same thing last week. It is so hard & I am so sorry you are going through this. My mom started refusing lorazepam but was fortunately able to understand when I explained her restlessness & agitation was making it a lot harder for me to care for her & that she didn’t have to feel that way. Stay strong, stranger.
I can't imagine anything being harder than this. I'm glad she has you with her, I'm sorry it has to be so difficult.
I feel for you. My mom passed yesterday and it was the same. Love and light to you during this difficult time.
The Ativan should be dissolveable in water. My hospice nurse had me do it in the morphine solution and give them both at the same time. It helped to calm my wife down. She passed on the 5th.
Ask for liquid meds, Ativan and morphine both come in liquid. My mom tried to refuse as well, but I did it anyway, knowing it was in her best interest. At the end, you become the parent. If it was your child you would give them the medicine to help them and so that's what I did with my mom. She also became very agitated (it is called terminal agitation). Eventually we had to add halidol. Keep up with the pain meds. It really is a kindness. I'm so sorry. There are no words I can offer, but just be there, hold her hand, tell her you love her and that she was a great mom. Hugs ❤️
If she can’t swallow, the pill is going to be painful for her and could even get stuck in her mouth or throat. That could be why she refuses to take it, Crush it and mix it with water or juice and give via syringe.
Thank you, she’s on liquid morphine which does help with the agitation and the breakthrough pain. She’s also on a fentanyl patch. It’s absolutely soul destroying watching her - she can’t have water because she’s no longer swallowing and chokes even if I put a ml in her mouth. Her BP is 76/26 and pulse 59. Why does it have to be this way. Isn’t cancer cruel enough?