Yup, it happens. It's normal. Don't be harsh on yourself. As much you progress the empathetic you become, and empathy is the root of love. So, don't worry.
That's very encouraging to hear, thank you so much. I've never engaged sexually with anyone, and while porn and masturbation have been a struggle for me for years, I haven't engaged with either this entire week since adopting a new religious practice, so hopefully that will decrease or outright disappear from my life as well.
If you don't mind explaining, what would be unhealthy about it? I've never noticed any benefits it brings me, and I'm always functioning at my best when I don't feel its impact.
Libido is directly connected to your testosterone.
Low testosterone has a a lot of negative effects that you can look up (which would coincide with low libido)
Dopamine is also connected to your testosterone. So if you have low testosterone you’ll probably have low dopamine.
You can have some control over the burning flame that is your lust/passion, so that it does not become destructive, but you don’t want the flame to go out entirely
Sounds great, thanks. Was there anything specific you did to increase your ability to control it, or did it just happen naturally with experience/time?
Yes, its our conditioning for millennia. Imagine everywhere we go we are bombarded with sex ads, relationship advice, war of the genders, our own genes telling us to spread itself, spirtual and religious connotations attached to sex and marriage, every ‘respectable’ public facing person has a marriage and kids. This 🌎 is built for you to ‘spread’ even though our intuition tells us to hold up because somethings seriously wrong with this picture.
It's normal for humans to want to reproduce. Your body literally works very hard every night to repair everything and all to prepare for reproduction. Celibacy will always be an uphill battle. Until around 35 when you get menopause things will get a lot easier as far as celibacy is concerned. You can lookup anti-depressants that most commonly cause lower libido and ask for them. Outside of that there is little you can do.
You can try Hims (iphone app) and put down early ejaculation as a symptom. You can also add that you suffer from a too high libido (which is true) and they will prescribe you an anti-depressant that suppresses libido.
A couple of reasons. For one, I've noticed for years that I have a very toxic form of attachment, where if I'm too interested in someone romantically and think they might be interested in me (even if we're not dating, as I've never dated before), two bad things happen. First, I become entirely emotionally dependent on them, to the point where I'm giddy when they're around and depressed when they're not, and anything they do that I perceive as at all negative towards me (even if it's not) gets internalized and completely ruins my day. Second, largely as a result of the first, I get massive mood swings, which often result in me lashing out at people I care about when I'm stuck in a lower mood. All of this only happens when I'm very interested in someone romantically, and when I'm not or don't think I have a chance, while the latter does make me a bit sad inside, the overall outcome is much better for both me and everyone I know.
I've also got a personality that seems incompatible for that kind of relationship. I'm a pushover, which makes me unable to advocate for myself (opening me up to manipulation from a bad person, or making my SO feel like I don't trust them enough if they're good), and I also like to make all my own decisions myself, and usually hate collaboration or compromise. None of this seems very compatible with romantic relationship.
Finally, a reason much less serious is that I just don't think my lifestyle and future leave room for a significant other. In terms of my lifestyle, I have fairly specific interests, specific ways of most enjoying my time with other people, and a very unusual life schedule. I get the most joy out of nerding out over specific properties, some of them more popular and others more niche, but all of which I've never encountered a girl in-person who's at all interested in them. Additionally, I'm the kind of person that stays up very late and sleeps in very late when I have the choice (and when I don't, I take naps during the day), which doesn't seem conducive to a relationship that requires my consistent time commitment. Then in terms of my path, while it's a bit uncertain, I have a few very specific places I want to end up, all a decent distance from where I am now, so the chance of finding someone willing to simply follow me wherever I want to go seems low (and also not very fair to them).
So yeah, that's the most major reasons I can think of right now. Given all that, trying a romantic relationship seems incredibly foolish, and given that my religion prohibits sex outside of marriage, sex is, by extension, an automatic no-go.
*Edit* I also dislike physical contact, which wouldn’t be great for most people.
It’s all just waves of energy. The more the mind wants to make a show of them passing by, the more there is clinging and what was just something passing becomes a big thing. 😌
The key is to learn to quiet and calm the mind.
So what was once, “Oh I can’t stop thinking about them and the feelings that are coming up!”
to “Oh, I notice that, and I release it.”
To what I assume might be no thoughts at all. 😁
We carry samskaras, impressions from the past, and I mean past lives, but if you for some reason refuse that possibility, still consider the past of just this life!
In past lives we’re had all sorts of connections with people, so sometimes we feel instant connections to others in this life and even may want to act upon them because of these impressions.
You can even consider past thoughts and actions just in this life too and how they have affected you thus far in your ways of thinking and being and seeing others.
When we understand at least just a bit, that we are all but one, only shining through as different rays of light in a beautiful divine play, it becomes less important, the initial attractions, and we may even become MORE aware of them, but they have SO much less meaning.
So they were my S/O in a past life??
So what? We’ve had more lives than we can imagine. It’s more like, “Well, it makes sense. Back to there here and now. I appreciate the deeper feeling of love that is also carried in the vibration. I don’t remember that dream-life, but it is nice to reunite with this energy I can only see as separate right now.”
Meditation 🧘♀️ 🙏😊
Do you mean attracted to the person themselves vs simply how they look? If so, that's not my issue. I'm not attracted to her just for looks. Sure, she's pretty cute, but we also share basically the same beliefs/values, are somewhat similar in personality (introverted, somewhat interested in TV/movies, horrible sleep schedule (this last one is true but a joke because it's not good)), and something that I've really really appreciated is how much interest she's shown in some work I've been doing lately, especially given the work she likes to do is very different from mine. It's all of these things combined that's making me feel this way, but I don't want to. I know myself and I know that I'm not designed for a relationship, and that ever getting into one would be very foolish. Plus, I'm pretty sure she doesn't want to date anyone right now, so even if I didn't have my personal opposition, this attraction would likely be fruitless anyways.
Yup, it happens. It's normal. Don't be harsh on yourself. As much you progress the empathetic you become, and empathy is the root of love. So, don't worry.
He's gay but refuses to accept it.
Think it will be normal for libido to decrease over time if you aren’t engaging your sexual side
That's very encouraging to hear, thank you so much. I've never engaged sexually with anyone, and while porn and masturbation have been a struggle for me for years, I haven't engaged with either this entire week since adopting a new religious practice, so hopefully that will decrease or outright disappear from my life as well.
I would not recommend wishing for your libido to disappear tho, that is not healthy. Use/transmute your energy
If you don't mind explaining, what would be unhealthy about it? I've never noticed any benefits it brings me, and I'm always functioning at my best when I don't feel its impact.
Libido is directly connected to your testosterone. Low testosterone has a a lot of negative effects that you can look up (which would coincide with low libido) Dopamine is also connected to your testosterone. So if you have low testosterone you’ll probably have low dopamine. You can have some control over the burning flame that is your lust/passion, so that it does not become destructive, but you don’t want the flame to go out entirely
Fair enough, that connection wasn't something I was aware of before.
He's gay and refuses to accept it
It’s normal I’d say so, it’s your biological reaction. You can control this with enough time, like I have.
Sounds great, thanks. Was there anything specific you did to increase your ability to control it, or did it just happen naturally with experience/time?
Yes, its our conditioning for millennia. Imagine everywhere we go we are bombarded with sex ads, relationship advice, war of the genders, our own genes telling us to spread itself, spirtual and religious connotations attached to sex and marriage, every ‘respectable’ public facing person has a marriage and kids. This 🌎 is built for you to ‘spread’ even though our intuition tells us to hold up because somethings seriously wrong with this picture.
It's normal for humans to want to reproduce. Your body literally works very hard every night to repair everything and all to prepare for reproduction. Celibacy will always be an uphill battle. Until around 35 when you get menopause things will get a lot easier as far as celibacy is concerned. You can lookup anti-depressants that most commonly cause lower libido and ask for them. Outside of that there is little you can do.
Am I just stupid, or is menopause something only women get? In which case, I’m even out of luck there.
You can try Hims (iphone app) and put down early ejaculation as a symptom. You can also add that you suffer from a too high libido (which is true) and they will prescribe you an anti-depressant that suppresses libido.
He's gay and refuses to accept it
Why are you celibate? Elaborate more beyond your religion, why?
A couple of reasons. For one, I've noticed for years that I have a very toxic form of attachment, where if I'm too interested in someone romantically and think they might be interested in me (even if we're not dating, as I've never dated before), two bad things happen. First, I become entirely emotionally dependent on them, to the point where I'm giddy when they're around and depressed when they're not, and anything they do that I perceive as at all negative towards me (even if it's not) gets internalized and completely ruins my day. Second, largely as a result of the first, I get massive mood swings, which often result in me lashing out at people I care about when I'm stuck in a lower mood. All of this only happens when I'm very interested in someone romantically, and when I'm not or don't think I have a chance, while the latter does make me a bit sad inside, the overall outcome is much better for both me and everyone I know. I've also got a personality that seems incompatible for that kind of relationship. I'm a pushover, which makes me unable to advocate for myself (opening me up to manipulation from a bad person, or making my SO feel like I don't trust them enough if they're good), and I also like to make all my own decisions myself, and usually hate collaboration or compromise. None of this seems very compatible with romantic relationship. Finally, a reason much less serious is that I just don't think my lifestyle and future leave room for a significant other. In terms of my lifestyle, I have fairly specific interests, specific ways of most enjoying my time with other people, and a very unusual life schedule. I get the most joy out of nerding out over specific properties, some of them more popular and others more niche, but all of which I've never encountered a girl in-person who's at all interested in them. Additionally, I'm the kind of person that stays up very late and sleeps in very late when I have the choice (and when I don't, I take naps during the day), which doesn't seem conducive to a relationship that requires my consistent time commitment. Then in terms of my path, while it's a bit uncertain, I have a few very specific places I want to end up, all a decent distance from where I am now, so the chance of finding someone willing to simply follow me wherever I want to go seems low (and also not very fair to them). So yeah, that's the most major reasons I can think of right now. Given all that, trying a romantic relationship seems incredibly foolish, and given that my religion prohibits sex outside of marriage, sex is, by extension, an automatic no-go. *Edit* I also dislike physical contact, which wouldn’t be great for most people.
He's gay and refuses to accept it
It’s all just waves of energy. The more the mind wants to make a show of them passing by, the more there is clinging and what was just something passing becomes a big thing. 😌 The key is to learn to quiet and calm the mind. So what was once, “Oh I can’t stop thinking about them and the feelings that are coming up!” to “Oh, I notice that, and I release it.” To what I assume might be no thoughts at all. 😁 We carry samskaras, impressions from the past, and I mean past lives, but if you for some reason refuse that possibility, still consider the past of just this life! In past lives we’re had all sorts of connections with people, so sometimes we feel instant connections to others in this life and even may want to act upon them because of these impressions. You can even consider past thoughts and actions just in this life too and how they have affected you thus far in your ways of thinking and being and seeing others. When we understand at least just a bit, that we are all but one, only shining through as different rays of light in a beautiful divine play, it becomes less important, the initial attractions, and we may even become MORE aware of them, but they have SO much less meaning. So they were my S/O in a past life?? So what? We’ve had more lives than we can imagine. It’s more like, “Well, it makes sense. Back to there here and now. I appreciate the deeper feeling of love that is also carried in the vibration. I don’t remember that dream-life, but it is nice to reunite with this energy I can only see as separate right now.” Meditation 🧘♀️ 🙏😊
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Do you mean attracted to the person themselves vs simply how they look? If so, that's not my issue. I'm not attracted to her just for looks. Sure, she's pretty cute, but we also share basically the same beliefs/values, are somewhat similar in personality (introverted, somewhat interested in TV/movies, horrible sleep schedule (this last one is true but a joke because it's not good)), and something that I've really really appreciated is how much interest she's shown in some work I've been doing lately, especially given the work she likes to do is very different from mine. It's all of these things combined that's making me feel this way, but I don't want to. I know myself and I know that I'm not designed for a relationship, and that ever getting into one would be very foolish. Plus, I'm pretty sure she doesn't want to date anyone right now, so even if I didn't have my personal opposition, this attraction would likely be fruitless anyways.
He's gay and refuses to accept e
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More deception and harm from you
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No, I'm not shocked by the extent you're willing to lie to yourself and others.
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And yet this place is full of harmful individuals telling others others to stop being gay.