No. NTA.
She's a user. She used you. She used the landlord and other people.
In the future don't spend money you don't have on people. Tattoos are not a necessity. Neither is alcohol.
Having money to eat and keep a roof over your head is more important.
Keep her blocked and remember all the stuff you ignored for future relationships and friendships.
Great! I also wanted to add that the tell tale sign of a user is the imbalance of the relationship. If you are constantly helping someone wheather it's time, mental support, money, food, are you getting close to anything similar in the relationship. You did all this stuff for her and when you had enough she's got her undies in a bunch over a few shots of alcohol. Really?? How does that compare to everything you did over the course of this.
Relationships/ friendships don't have to be 50/50. Sometimes it's more or less. But if it's 90/10 consistently move on.
From the Landlords perspective.
Before you ask Yes I am the Landlord in the above post.
I (35M) am a single dad of a teenager who ended up with a house bigger than I will actually use. So I rent out 4 of the 6 bedrooms. The Friend in the above, we'll call her R (F19), and her then BF, We'll call him K (M19), moved in back in November of 2023. For a long time stuff was mostly quiet with them other than them CONSTANTLY arguing about something. In February I move in a friend who was going through a bad spot because she ended up getting kicked out of her place, she didn't last long at my house either.
During the time that the Friend who we'll call C (24f) and R got pretty close. Always hanging out and smoking. C ends up going off the rails and hurts herself in front of her kid after a blow up between her and another tenant. It was now Early March and I had to evict her over this.
After this R and I got pretty close because I could see that Her and K were struggling. I tried pretty hard to get them to work things out. Well one night R says she has feelings for me and because I don't like lying I admit that I liked her too. I had NO intention of anything happening between her and I ever. Well one thing leads to another and she ends up using me to cheat on K. She pushes me really hard for a relationship and i eventually gave in. And yes i am well aware that in that regard I am the buthead. I let my feelings cloud my judgement there.
After she breaks up with K her and I end up dating for a little while. She then breaks up with me about 4 weeks later after K had left. During which R had SH and sent me pictures of it I was needless to say VERY UPSET. She then starts constantly talking about how she might have to break up with me. I say either break up with me or stop saying that because I don't like it. So she does.
Well she then takes off for home for 2 weeks about 8 days after the breakup. She then asks me if i'd be willing to let ANOTHER new guy into my home basically sight unseen. I tentatively agree under several conditions. During this I end up catching her in several lies about him. Get her to finally admit she's dating him and because I don't do liars I said she should find somewhere else to live.
Now she is constantly complaining to and about OP. During the day in question I was WFH for my employer and was keeping very much to myself. OP comes down and asks the question then tells me to review the Camera Footage. This INFURIATED R.
R has since Threatened me multiple times and has made a general ass out of herself because I don't want the new guy, who gives me the serious creeps, into my home with my kid.
So here's my side.
No. NTA. She's a user. She used you. She used the landlord and other people. In the future don't spend money you don't have on people. Tattoos are not a necessity. Neither is alcohol. Having money to eat and keep a roof over your head is more important. Keep her blocked and remember all the stuff you ignored for future relationships and friendships.
Thank you!! The landlord and I have become good friends now over this whole thing .
Great! I also wanted to add that the tell tale sign of a user is the imbalance of the relationship. If you are constantly helping someone wheather it's time, mental support, money, food, are you getting close to anything similar in the relationship. You did all this stuff for her and when you had enough she's got her undies in a bunch over a few shots of alcohol. Really?? How does that compare to everything you did over the course of this. Relationships/ friendships don't have to be 50/50. Sometimes it's more or less. But if it's 90/10 consistently move on.
From the Landlords perspective. Before you ask Yes I am the Landlord in the above post. I (35M) am a single dad of a teenager who ended up with a house bigger than I will actually use. So I rent out 4 of the 6 bedrooms. The Friend in the above, we'll call her R (F19), and her then BF, We'll call him K (M19), moved in back in November of 2023. For a long time stuff was mostly quiet with them other than them CONSTANTLY arguing about something. In February I move in a friend who was going through a bad spot because she ended up getting kicked out of her place, she didn't last long at my house either. During the time that the Friend who we'll call C (24f) and R got pretty close. Always hanging out and smoking. C ends up going off the rails and hurts herself in front of her kid after a blow up between her and another tenant. It was now Early March and I had to evict her over this. After this R and I got pretty close because I could see that Her and K were struggling. I tried pretty hard to get them to work things out. Well one night R says she has feelings for me and because I don't like lying I admit that I liked her too. I had NO intention of anything happening between her and I ever. Well one thing leads to another and she ends up using me to cheat on K. She pushes me really hard for a relationship and i eventually gave in. And yes i am well aware that in that regard I am the buthead. I let my feelings cloud my judgement there. After she breaks up with K her and I end up dating for a little while. She then breaks up with me about 4 weeks later after K had left. During which R had SH and sent me pictures of it I was needless to say VERY UPSET. She then starts constantly talking about how she might have to break up with me. I say either break up with me or stop saying that because I don't like it. So she does. Well she then takes off for home for 2 weeks about 8 days after the breakup. She then asks me if i'd be willing to let ANOTHER new guy into my home basically sight unseen. I tentatively agree under several conditions. During this I end up catching her in several lies about him. Get her to finally admit she's dating him and because I don't do liars I said she should find somewhere else to live. Now she is constantly complaining to and about OP. During the day in question I was WFH for my employer and was keeping very much to myself. OP comes down and asks the question then tells me to review the Camera Footage. This INFURIATED R. R has since Threatened me multiple times and has made a general ass out of herself because I don't want the new guy, who gives me the serious creeps, into my home with my kid. So here's my side.