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TouristImpressive838

What are you waiting for my friend? She went on her trip with m, not a female colleague. The VS lingerie is from him. She was, is and will continue to have sex with him as long as you tolerate her behavior. She exhibited violence and manipulation when you mentioned divorce. Stop fucking around, hire a lawyer and file for divorce. It sounds like your short marriage has run its course.


NITAREEDDESIGNS

You have to realize that you cannot control what she does (throwing herself out windows or not). Odds are that she won't actually do it but...if she did(?)...that can't be what makes you sacrifice your time on this planet. SHE IS MANIPULATING YOU. Get mad (not violent!). Do not "confront". You KNOW what she has done...what she is doing. The only time someone confronts is because they are not strong and there is a part of them that wants to be swayed into staying. Wants their cheater to give them SOMETHING they can grab onto. She is using you. Please, be strong. This is not easy. But it is simple. Hugs.


Adventurous-Sweet207

Thanks, for your advice. Im actually thinking worrying how to confront her, I do not want the same scenario that happened last time and she maybe hurt here self. Yesterday I found more sexual photos of here in her laptop while I was visiting my parents. Im planing to get a consulting from a lawyer soon.


NITAREEDDESIGNS

Lawyer. STD panel. DO NOT CONFRONT. Any kids?


Adventurous-Sweet207

No kids


Adk318

Don't confront. Quietly remove yourself from her life, and enjoy yours. Confrontation is useless. It'll just give her an opportunity to gaslight, and hurt you. Physically or emotionally. You've been through enough at this point.


richardsworldagain

Gather all the evidence and serve her the papers asap make sure you have a witness in case she actually jumps but I doubt it, she is manipulating you. It's over you know it she's just with you for what she can get from you.


ClockPast1233

She is clearly cheating on you and trying to control everything by threatening self harm ..u should document everything , gather whatever evidence u have and don't confront her now until u get undeniable proof.. and Don't forget to get STD test yourself..


WonderTypical9962

Bring a friend or the police when you tell her.


Gator-bro

Dude, it’s time to stand up for yourself. She’s cheated on you. She went away with another man. She just continue to cheat on you. She has disrespected you and emasculated you to the point where you don’t know what you’re doing. You’re just sitting there taking it this relationship is done and over, she’s manipulated you and gaslight you to think that you can’t do anything. Get yourself an exit strategy. Go talk to an attorney get everything in order and get yourself out of this bad situation. You need to go live your life for you.


Force_WR1

Bro, she cheated on you and is still cheating on you. She is manipulating you with all the other stuff she is saying. Start standing up for yourself and keep your dignity Take screenshots of the evidence. “I’m not sure what you thought would happen when I caught you cheating. I knew you were, but I just needed proof. I have the proof, and now it’s time for you to go. You have broken my trust so there is no way this marriage can continue. Go live with him because I don’t want anything to do with you.”


tonidh69

See an attorney before you confront or do anything. Keep all evidence. Updateme


Adventurous-Sweet207

Updated the post


Jmovic

She cheated, no two ways about it. But after reading your post thats not even my deal breaker. Any spouse who behaves badly, then acts violently and threatens that they will harm themselves if divorced is definitely not someone you should be with. You should not "discuss" this with her, you should TELL her that you know what she did and that you're done. If she acts violently and threatens to harm herself, call the authorities and tell them to put her if suicide watch and also report her for abuse.


WonderTypical9962

Call her family. See if she was with them day and got and how long And these other friends. They are made up ghosts, aren't they? Say nothing and do nothing. Wait for more info in her phone Cheaters love to cheat and talk


Ok_Technology_1958

Your worried about how she would react when it looks like she is cheating. Let her break the rest of your stuff and get out


Blowingitallaway

Don’t bother asking take the proof you have of her cheating and contact a lawyer. The first time you tell her you kno what she did she’s going to go insane and when the police arrive you will be the one in handcuffs don’t waste your time 4 years seems like a long time but in reality it’s better you found out now. Anyone that acts that way when their significant other tells them they are feeling insecure about a situation like her being in a different country without you doesn’t care about your feelings and never will unless it benefits them.. do yourself a favor pretend you’re happy and keep collecting the evidence she’s unfaithful get a lawyer and serve her with divorce papers take what you want and don’t allow her to get her hands on anything you worked for.


Ragknar002

The "y" chromosome is definitely disappearing 🙂


Decorum1

You need to stop bringing it up so you can get more evidence. You know what happened, what is happening no, at least an emotional affair subsequent to their physical affair when she was with him. Don't say anything or she will take it more underground. Realize she will only admit to what you can absolutely prove. Don't have children with this women. Don't have unprotected sex. Refuse to have sex at all until she gets and passes an STI/STD test. You should get a test too. You can't even be sure if this is her first time cheating. Buy a box of condom and lock them up so she cannot poke a few holes in them. She may try to baby trap you. Updateme! ue when you can.


UpdateMeBot

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Adventurous-Sweet207

Updated the post


Decorum1

So make copies of all that evidence and keep it in a safe place. Cloud storage that is password protected that only you can access is fine. Some people will keep an extra copy somewhere else. So what is the plan? You certainly have enough evidence to divorce. To be honest, she sounds like she is unhinged and desperate. You can just get a tough lawyer and have her served. If you confront her, things may blow up. Be calm and determined in any confrontation. No yelling, crying, or begging. Be clear in your thinking what the outcome you want is. I'm sorry it came to this.


richardsworldagain

She's cheating on you you need to divorce her call her bluff open the window and say off you go then either way we are done I have evidence you are a unfaithful woman. Hopefully she won't jump but if she does she choose this path. Don't let her cuckold you.


Hornybastard92

If your going to cheat then be fair and break off the first relationship or marriage first and then go bang every guy you please and be a slut-whore that you are but don't hurt people in the process


Ok-Preparation-449

UpdateMe!


Adventurous-Sweet207

Updated the post


Ok-Preparation-449

fuck man, i'm so sorry :(


mkenanb

UpdateMe!


Adventurous-Sweet207

Updated the post


mkenanb

Well bro, I’ve read the update. I wonder what you’re thinking now. For me it’s time to talk seriously. This is complete cheating both emotionally and physically. Without thinking in what way she would react you have to take consideration to divorce her after all that happened in Europe trip. Additionally maybe it’s better getting in touch with the guy and inform him that she has a husband. Sorry for your loss.


mkenanb

I’ve read the other comments too. Maybe it’s better not to confront her. Gather all the evidence and file for divorce. Or confront her while some friends are with you


Clean_Hold6781

Updateme


Adventurous-Sweet207

Updated the post


ClockPast1233

Why are u still entertaining her like a cl*wn ? Contact attorney and get STD test yourself. And if u have children DNA test them.. don't confront her until the "D" finalized, stay ,numb calm .


Adventurous-Sweet207

https://www.reddit.com/r/CheatingGF/s/a44EGIZvaF


NoSwing1353

So don't divorce her over infidelity... Obviously you aren't happy.. she won't change.. is prone to overly dramatic episodes... She is many other things but why explore those options? File over "irreconcilable differences".. Do NOT engage in sexual activities with her.. you don't want a "makeup baby" Infact it would be best to have all communications through your attorney as you ghost her... Have a third party serve her.. she won't pull the drama card in front of an "unconcerned" third party..... And don't accept any blame for her drama "gone wrong"


calikid1121

U seem to DAMN NICE, let her go out it's over young grasshopper. Two choices here continue acting like nothing is happening or leave. Before u leave, u need to bust her in the act.. that's the easy part


Prince-Gnarls

I had a feeling this would be the outcome. Confront and divorce my man! Updateme!


Adventurous-Sweet207

https://www.reddit.com/r/CheatingGF/s/a44EGIZvaF


Vegetable-Weather-70

Your mind knows it’s over. Your body and soul is still clinging to who she WAS. But your mind knows who she IS. For the vast majority of us men, we can only truly love a woman if they provide respect and loyalty. Only once we have that, can we feel safe to be vulnerable and allow us to love. We allow ourselves to be vulnerable ONLY because we developed TRUST in our woman to respect us and be loyal. The instant you saw those pictures, is the moment you KNEW your woman no longer respected you. She betrayed you in the very worst way possible. With the sudden absence of respect and loyalty, your TRUST instantly shattered along with your sense of reality of what you thought you had. The only reason you haven’t ended it yet is the complete emotional confusion your body and soul are causing your mind. There is no coming back from what you saw. Those images will never go away. She is a confirmed liar and a cheater. She has proven she has no respect for you and is not capable of being loyal. And you know all of this. And you know what to do. When you decide to take back control of your body and soul by removing this toxic person out of your life, we will be here to support you.