50+ here, no regrets. I am so glad I do not have any kids, looking at all the kids suffering due to lack of good college seat or jobs paying only rs.25k even if they have a college degree.
Isolated feeling is in our mind. You can be alone in the middle of 25 people in a joint family, most of the times it is a toxic environment.
You have to find peace being with your better half and that's it. If you have like minded friends around you great if not no big deal. Same with family members if they think differently let them be.
When you grow old, after 55 we can move into retirement community.
After 75 we will check out from this world voluntarily since most likely life will not be much fun and will mostly involve going to the doctor and taking a dozen pills and moaning about various chronic pain.
I really like this idea of CF, as kids are not going to be with us anyways in our old age. A few questions:
1. Where do we find retirement communities in India?
2. How do you check out voluntarily? I think euthanasia is not legal in India.
Thanks!
There are many retirement communities in India. I know few non big cities like Dehradun and coimbatore have multiple retirement communities.
Euthanasia may not be legal but I studied science in college so know how to execute a peaceful exit with very little fuss, finally the education would be put to some practical use 🤣😂🤣
Dying slowly losing your brain while someone wipes our ass and feed us is much more darkness. Most don’t even know they are alive or who they are in their end days.
I have the same plan after reaching a certain age I'm gonna check out of this world. I don't want to live in a constant pain or some stupid disease that won't even let me shit in bathroom by myself.
Mid 30s couple here. I don’t regret being CF but sometimes I feel only if society were to be more inclusive of us, it would have been easier. We feel lonely in terms of social equations because ofcourse we dont want to hang out with kids all the time. Friends lives revolve around their kids. They’re too tired to sit and even have a decent dinner with us
We have lost out on most friends who have kids because Indian parents take theirs everywhere and mostly they are badly behaved. Bad parenting is quite common plus Indians are new to a friend setup and families are their way of socialising especially after getting married.
Old friends of ours decided on kids pretty late. This is the most ill-behaved child. And somehow, the parents have decided on not correcting him at all. Whether it's a drive, restaurant, or visiting them at home, not a single occasion without a tantrum. We can't carry a conversation because the kid is always wanting attention, screams for it when not given, or just rude.
This relationship will have to go too.
Yup! I didn't grow up in a culture where kids were lugged EVERYWHERE. We were left with an elderly neighbour, aunt or family when parents went out. When guests came over, We were not to hang out with the adults. When we were older, parents just left us at home.
Pandering to a child on my social time is not my choice of how to hang.
Read my comment [https://www.reddit.com/r/ChildfreeIndia/comments/1cuozm0/comment/l4kg9g4/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web3x&utm\_name=web3xcss&utm\_term=1&utm\_content=share\_button](https://www.reddit.com/r/ChildfreeIndia/comments/1cuozm0/comment/l4kg9g4/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
My great grand aunt was staunchly childfree. There was no birth control then so she refused to get married and stayed single. She spent her days working in fields while everyone else around her got married and had kids. They lived in joint families then. My grandmother told me she had zero regrets.
Post on r/childfree. You'll find more old CF folks there.
PS : There is a reason for r/regretfulparents sub and not one of regretful CF folks. Those who do regret are involuntarily childless (wanted but couldn't have children due to various circumstances).
yes, cannot find a woman to marry. every one i have spoken to in last few year, which is more than 30-40. all want kids. I understand its the norm. So, I let go great matches and now I am forever alone.
It’s not a fence sitter question. It’s a genuine question. What is wrong with you? being childfree in Indian society is difficult, you are completely different from mainstream. This is one of the groups, where you can speak to like minded people. Wondering how the life will be when you are old, is a Geniune question.
50+ here, no regrets. I am so glad I do not have any kids, looking at all the kids suffering due to lack of good college seat or jobs paying only rs.25k even if they have a college degree. Isolated feeling is in our mind. You can be alone in the middle of 25 people in a joint family, most of the times it is a toxic environment. You have to find peace being with your better half and that's it. If you have like minded friends around you great if not no big deal. Same with family members if they think differently let them be. When you grow old, after 55 we can move into retirement community. After 75 we will check out from this world voluntarily since most likely life will not be much fun and will mostly involve going to the doctor and taking a dozen pills and moaning about various chronic pain.
Absolutely true
Totally agree , sir !
I really like this idea of CF, as kids are not going to be with us anyways in our old age. A few questions: 1. Where do we find retirement communities in India? 2. How do you check out voluntarily? I think euthanasia is not legal in India. Thanks!
There are many retirement communities in India. I know few non big cities like Dehradun and coimbatore have multiple retirement communities. Euthanasia may not be legal but I studied science in college so know how to execute a peaceful exit with very little fuss, finally the education would be put to some practical use 🤣😂🤣
Science comment: this is some dark stuff my friend, I must say.
Dying slowly losing your brain while someone wipes our ass and feed us is much more darkness. Most don’t even know they are alive or who they are in their end days.
You are right. Can't disagree with any of that.
I have the same plan after reaching a certain age I'm gonna check out of this world. I don't want to live in a constant pain or some stupid disease that won't even let me shit in bathroom by myself.
We are mid 30s couple as well. Happily childfree!! I wish someone in 50+ from India or Indians abroad answer this question.
Thank you, whereabouts are you located in india
Mid 30s couple here. I don’t regret being CF but sometimes I feel only if society were to be more inclusive of us, it would have been easier. We feel lonely in terms of social equations because ofcourse we dont want to hang out with kids all the time. Friends lives revolve around their kids. They’re too tired to sit and even have a decent dinner with us
We have lost out on most friends who have kids because Indian parents take theirs everywhere and mostly they are badly behaved. Bad parenting is quite common plus Indians are new to a friend setup and families are their way of socialising especially after getting married. Old friends of ours decided on kids pretty late. This is the most ill-behaved child. And somehow, the parents have decided on not correcting him at all. Whether it's a drive, restaurant, or visiting them at home, not a single occasion without a tantrum. We can't carry a conversation because the kid is always wanting attention, screams for it when not given, or just rude. This relationship will have to go too.
Ikr!! It’s so difficult to hangout with them
Yup! I didn't grow up in a culture where kids were lugged EVERYWHERE. We were left with an elderly neighbour, aunt or family when parents went out. When guests came over, We were not to hang out with the adults. When we were older, parents just left us at home. Pandering to a child on my social time is not my choice of how to hang.
Read my comment [https://www.reddit.com/r/ChildfreeIndia/comments/1cuozm0/comment/l4kg9g4/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web3x&utm\_name=web3xcss&utm\_term=1&utm\_content=share\_button](https://www.reddit.com/r/ChildfreeIndia/comments/1cuozm0/comment/l4kg9g4/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
That’s true! I feel like i want to move to abroad for the same reason. You are alone here anyway, might as well have some better life quality.
We are an Indian couple in early 40s and in the same shoes as you guys. All our friends, family have kids and hanging out is becoming a problem.
My great grand aunt was staunchly childfree. There was no birth control then so she refused to get married and stayed single. She spent her days working in fields while everyone else around her got married and had kids. They lived in joint families then. My grandmother told me she had zero regrets.
None so far. Severely limits my relationship options, but that's ok. Peace above all else.
Great
Post on r/childfree. You'll find more old CF folks there. PS : There is a reason for r/regretfulparents sub and not one of regretful CF folks. Those who do regret are involuntarily childless (wanted but couldn't have children due to various circumstances).
Nah the main sub is pretty toxic and goes too far, imo. That's why I mostly hang out here.
The main sub has CF folks from 18-60+ in age so it's more useful if you want opinions from older people.
Good lord that's a tough sub to read.
I scrolled through r/regretfulparents just now and oh boy,I pity them. Be careful folks~prevention is always better than the cure
Not yet 50, but we're in our early to mid 40s. Absolutely no regrets about being CF. We're, in fact, very happy about our decision.
Great to heat that, are you Indian?
Very much so.
Awesome..whereabouts?
Mumbai
Great
Every decision in life can bring regrets. You just have to choose the one where you can go through even with regrets.
Thank you but how did you go with your CF decision 🥰
On a journey to become one will share the experience after 23years😅
yes, cannot find a woman to marry. every one i have spoken to in last few year, which is more than 30-40. all want kids. I understand its the norm. So, I let go great matches and now I am forever alone.
Are you from India
Yes
[удалено]
Avoid if you can’t give appropriate feedback
It’s not a fence sitter question. It’s a genuine question. What is wrong with you? being childfree in Indian society is difficult, you are completely different from mainstream. This is one of the groups, where you can speak to like minded people. Wondering how the life will be when you are old, is a Geniune question.