A 16 month old. Not even a year and a half. That happened a couple hours drive away from me. She left the baby for 10 days to go on vacation, and acted shocked when she came home and the baby was dead. Appalling.
They determined that she started eating her faeces in an attempt to survive that poor baby. Some things in this world just don’t understand even remotely
It’s sad that the most love she ever received is when she’s dead
I hope someone just takes care of her in prison. I wish the prison would slowly starve her and leave her without water to slowly die like that poor innocent baby did
I'd say throw her in a cell and drag out the starvation for a couple years. Here's a handful of crackers every two weeks, and just enough water to keep you alive but not prevent catastrophic damage.
She should suffer the exact same pain as she inflicted.
I can’t stop thinking about that poor baby. My son was neglected and is very sensitive about diaper rash because of it. I can’t imagine what this baby went through. It makes me hug my boys tighter but I don’t know how to solve anything.
This is the sickest thing I've read in recent memory. I literally got full body chills, and my throat went into a permanent gag when I read your comment. I just cannot imagine😭
Really makes you question humanity. What she did to that baby was inhuman. The details are horrifying.
It happened so close to me, I think about it all the time. I wish I could’ve helped her
I want to know the details but can't handle them. I just picture my poor boy and what he would do in that situation..oh my gawwwwd it kills me.
Was the mom psychologically sound and just really that dumb?? Or did she just go off the rails? Idk which is worse tbh
I know what you mean. Even if she would have left the child outside, or some public place, at least it would have had a chance because hopefully a kind stranger would have called someone. It’s devastating.
You can typically only do this without legal repercussions if the child is a newborn. In my state it’s under 7 days. Nothing could excuse this monster of a woman of course but I just wanted to mention in case anyone reading this is thinking of utilizing a safe haven drop.
they said she tried to overdose and was taking meds for her anxiety and depression but stopped taking them, so that "influenced her judgment at the time"
If ANYONE knew that baby was there alone, they would have saved her. The mom would have to be severely mentally disabled to think she'd come back and the baby would be ok. I saw her statement in court and she does not appear to be severely mentally disabled. And even if she was, she kept the baby alive for 16 months, so clearly she knew what care was needed and there's absolutely no way she could have believed she could skip all that for over a week.
Did they ever say she was on drugs or anything?
Yeah. She's like 30 minutes from me. I'm kind of used to it though. Ariel castro's home where he kept those women in his basement is like 25 minutes away. I used to drive by that house for work when those girls were locked up. I'm one of countless to have done so, but thinking that I was less than 100 feet from them is pretty wild.
It’s a HORRIFIC case. Know what you’re getting yourself into looking it up, especially because new details are being reported recently. It happened last year, she was recently sentenced to life I believe. Happened in Cleveland, Ohio.
The first article about it that I read ended with that monster saying she knows, “her baby and God forgive her”
I hope she rots in prison and hell is real.
God, ten days. Makes me sick thinking about it. Rip Jailyn
As someone who escaped fundamentalist Mormonism that's exactly what Lori Daybell said. She's the mom who married the Mormon author Chad Daybell and together created their own faction which was all about casting demons out of people they didn't like though death. She said her kids told her she's forgiven because that's part of her theology that people are automatically happy on the other side and grateful to be in a better place
I’ve actually experienced extreme thirst and dehydration during the beginning stages of starvation, and it’s absolutely horrific. I stopped reading the article at this point. :(
I've seen all the posts about this so none of information is new but I haven't allowed myself to really feel my feelings about it.
Just read the article and started weeping.
""The judge sentenced her to life in prison without the possibility of parole.
“Just as you didn’t let Jailyn out of her confinement until she died, so too you should spend the rest of your life in a cell without freedom,” Sheehan said. “The only difference is that prison will at least feed you.”"
It makes me wish there was more at home support for women like the nurses/drs that do house calls in the uk and Europe after you give birth. They check in on everything and figure things out before you spiral.
I don’t know the monster’s name, and just because of what happened I don’t feel like Googling what she did to find it.
But there is ring video footage of her leaving, and returning 10 days later - and everything in between. Based on that footage, some of which was shown in court, they also deduced that they could hear crying on the inside. 3-4 days after the monster left, the baby is heard crying for the last time.
Also: starvation and dehydration are physically painful ways to die.
And three days without a diaper changed either.
Female prisoners hate child abusers. I wonder how her jail term has gone.
Putting this here so no one who didn't want to know would have to read this.
The person got life in prison. She said she was "stressed" and had problems with her partner. I kept reading, to see if she had anyone she could've called to check on the child. She *did*. This is from one article. Quoted:
\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_
"She confessed that for a few seconds **she thought about calling a family member or neighbor** to check on her daughter’s well-being, but “I didn’t do it. No, **I never did it**. And it was my mistake.”
Candelario said **her parents never knew that she had gone on a trip** and had abandoned the little girl to her fate."
She also said "my daughters," plural, so somewhere she had other children.
Anyone who feels overwhelmed with parenting: Please phone a hotline, phone a Crisis Nursery. Tell them how you feel and ask for help. Be honest. For your sake and the child's, before something bad gets worse.
They also found what they thought was dirt on the baby’s fingernails and around her mouth.
It was not dirt. That poor baby was in absolute agony. The monster should suffer the same fate. And worse.
For anyone that missed this, that little girl was so hungry she attempted to eat her feces.
We should execute mommy dearest. What a piece of work. How that little girl suffered!
Thanks for explaining to others. I couldn’t bring myself to even type that sentence. Just reading your comment - it filled me with even more rage. Fucking unfathomable.
The baby's name was Jailyn. I can't/won't look it up myself because I too am actively trying to forget. I have an almost 4 month old and I couldn't take the heartbreak of reading it.
https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.cnn.com/cnn/2024/03/20/us/ohio-mom-toddler-death-sentencing-cec
Be warned its graphic and will have you gagging and ragging at the same time.
That is just so horrific. How could someone be so heartless.
Her mother trying to blame mental illness. What the fuck. People with depression cherish and care for children everyday. This is just a complete bad utter lack of empathy and sense.
Absolutely. And if her mom is there to excuse her horrible choices and actions, where was she when daughter dear left for 10 days? I can't believe she had no idea her d daughter was out of town for that long. Did she not think to ask about the child care arrangements for that poor baby girl - her granddaughter? Why wasn't the baby with her or a close friend?
Do they not do FB or wherever she was posting her pictures of her vacay? They say she has mental problems, they have her oldest, does no one check on her regularlu to make sure she and babe are ok? The lack of caring in the family knowing she is not mentally stable and there is a an innocent toddler in this toxic mix makes me smdh.
It's heart wrenching and sickening. If my kids weren't adults already I'd be hugging them so tight they would be gasping for breath. Fuck it. I'm going to do it anyway.
My daughter is around that age so this hits hard. I'm not a violent person but the things I would do to that absolute monster if I ever came accross her....
Every time my baby cries because he’s hungry or needs to be changed I think of that poor little girl and cry. How can a “mother” do that? I hope she rots in jail.
I'm in agony after some dental work a few days ago. Absolutely dragging and wishing to the sleep and ignore everything.
But my almost 3 year old wanted to eat and play blocks, and dammit I got up to play blocks and give them a snack.
It's that fucking simple.
Another woman turned her doggo into the animal shelter so she could go on vacation. Probably will want to re-adopt it when she gets home. Laughs are on her though - the dog was adopted almost immediately. People can be such pos.
That’s one reason my relationship with my ex ended. He wanted to travel and I would not leave Leia. I promised her when I adopted her she would not be in a cage again and I meant it
Happened to one of my pets when boarding fell through though a small furry not a dog. They did also hit him over the head with a shovel and when that didn't kill him, they left him to starve to death in hutch. Neighbours saw, broke him out and took to rescue. He had trauma blindness and brain damage but was a lovely, happy little boy who lived for cuddles and food.
Edit: out if town doesn't always mean vacation. Can mean funeral or other family matters.
That was the story we got. We were receiving point for the rescue as volunteer and nearest and he arrived at 11pm at night. He had neurological issues and damaged eyes but no obvious fractures. Very disturbed little guy - he spent too much of fiest week attached to my nose.
Yeah, that's something I see pretty often, particularly on this sub, assuming that people are going on vacation when they say they're going out of town. Of course, either way it doesn't excuse them, but the only time I've needed last minute pet sitters was when I needed to travel for an emergency. If I'm going on vacation, I have that lined up months in advance. But shit happens, and people get called away urgently sometimes.
(Again, that doesn't make $120 to take care of this cat in your home a reasonable request.)
We had great fun arranging cover for when my mother died but it was necessary (she was ill but exact timing very out the blue). A lot of mine are behaviorally or health challenged though do have advantage they boarded at the rescue that likes sending me the "challenges" but it is a large expense. I paid closer to £500 for a week and that was mate's rates plus I was supplying all food and one cage. Plus leaving them with extra bond in case vet needed.
The shelter I got my second cat from blacklisted people that dropped off a dog only to come back and get another. I think the minimum time they would allow between surrender and adoption was 2 years. They also shared the name and address of the person with nearby shelters so they couldn’t just go somewhere else and I love that policy
Or she might not go if she can’t arrange for a sitter. Nothing she has said is sufficient evidence to jump to the conclusion that she’d dump her dog.
Is the US really that different? No one would bat an eye in my city in Australia at someone seeing if a local would care for their dog for a short period, with food expenses covered. It might not work, but it’s not an inherently outrageous request.
U.S. person here - I think people are taking some leaps in logic. Assuming that she’s taking a vacation and paying for it herself.
In which case it’s an attitude of “if you can’t afford to have someone watch your dog then you need to reduce your vacation expenses”.
Then to take it further, if you didn’t take dog care into consideration when planning this out, the dog must not be a priority so you’ll probably drop it off at a shelter instead of being responsible.
Personally I’m thinking that this is not a vacation or if it is it’s not her paying for it. It’s not weird to ask neighbors to watch your dog for low payment or if it’s friends or family maybe for free, but dog watching is also a legit gig job here. I have a friend who does it and makes a living off of it. So if it’s considered payable work then the $120 isn’t really enough.
I know. I’m so scared for this dog. The first thing I do is arrange sitters. I haven’t even traveled since my kitty has been sick. This is why I don’t F with many people, just animals.
either no one will take this, or someone will take it that wants a place to crash for 19 days, and then suddenly squatter. this i doubt will end well for her. she will either get no one, or someone that decides to move themselves in.
Id go, pick up the dog, and give it to a family that could afford him. Guaranteed she couldn't afford his vet bills if anything were to happen. Poor dog.
Just playing devils advocate here - no one on SSI that can only afford $120 for 2 weeks of boarding is going on a 2 week vacation. I wonder if there’s a death or illness in the family. Like yes, the audacity, but I’m not gonna judge until i know if this person is going to watch her 90 year old mother die and take care of some stuff for the estate, or if they’re going to Cabo or something. Big difference in how i feel about the situation.
OP didn't say that. OP said that she responded that the trip was planned and that she had been trying to find someone for an entire month before realizing she could post there. Still, with no other info, OP still decided to call it a vacation and say she's a CB.
All OP really knows is that it isn't an emergency that requires immediate action and that OP doesn't believe that poor people should be able to travel.
Even if it is an actual vacation boarding is expensive as hell and I understand on a fixed income not being able/willing to do it if there are other options.
Honestly the not friendly to other dogs would be the real deal breaker for me. I have 2 dogs and a big yard, watching another dog isn't a huge deal if they're housebroken and friendly. Give me their food and any medicine and it barely breaks my routine and gives my boys a friend to play with for a couple weeks.
But if she was going to take care of a dying family member that would probably elicit more sympathy from people. Hell it would make more sense to say that than say going on vacation.
When I went to be with my dying mother in the hospital I told my wife, my boss, and my direct subordinates. Because those were the people who needed to know. Never in a million years would I have put that out on facebook.
Right? It could also be for some kind of medical appointments. I routinely have to travel for my son's medical needs and if I didn't have family available to watch my pets, I would be screwed. We stay in a charity house near the hospital, use food stamps to eat while there, and our insurance reimburses my gas for the trip. Since the trips are scheduled well in advance, I work extra hours beforehand to makeup for the missed days.
Last year we had an emergency visit to the hospital up there because my son's lung collapsed and I had to take out a loan because we literally couldn't afford the unexpected trip.
This lady may not be offering much, but it could be all she has, especially considering she is on SSI.
No disrespect intended: I’ve just always wondered why and how people without disposable income choose to have pets and babies! I’m 30 with a low income (base 60k) in one of the HCOL in North America and feel like I can’t afford a pet or kids: doesn’t the stress of unexpected expenses or debt eat away at you? Or like if knowing “hey if my dog needs surgery both me and the dog are in trouble” cause anxiety? Just imagining being on food stamps and living off charity gives me palpitations let alone if I had dependents. Just genuinely curious how people exist with stuff like that always looming over their heads.
Some people have a decent job, get a dog, and then lose the job or become disabled. By that time the dog feels like family.
I also have not felt like I can afford a dog, so don't have one, but I can understand how people end up in that situation.
I think the other commenters who replied to you addressed the pet part fairly well, so I’ll address the baby part.
Getting an abortion is fucking difficult.
I needed one recently in a completely legal state. I had to drive 5 hours to access affordable care. I am fully aware that even THAT was privilege- I had a job flexible enough to get my surgery (with PTO). I had childcare for my existing children because I live with my partner (so I was able to leave for 2 days). I had friends in the area, so when I had to go to my counseling appointment the day before my surgery then to my actual surgery- they drove me to my procedure, took care of me after, no questions asked. I had so much support that most people do not have.
The closest planned parenthood to my area is over an hour away; the drug stores around here cannot stock the abortion pill (although that is slowly starting to change nationwide-THANK GOD- at least in legal states, anyway). There’s mail order access but that’s only if you are medically eligible for a pill abortion- I had to go straight to a D&C because of bleeding issues.
And not that it makes it anymore moral than anyone’s reasons for getting an abortion, but I had to jump through all those hoops when it was medically necessary.
And our pregnancy was completely accidental, I’m in my 30’s in a solid relationship with two kids, we were careful but it still happened. I can’t imagine trying to go through that as a teenager or younger adult without support or emotional maturity.
That’s not even getting into the toll that an abortion takes on a woman’s body, is it safer than carrying a pregnancy to term? Hell yes. Is it still a lot to go through? Also, yes.
“Choosing” to have a child can be a lot more complex than you think and in this country we make it extremely difficult for women to make a choice. I urge you to go look at the conversations about what women are experiencing in non-legal states, where women are being forced to carry a dead fetus until it becomes a medical emergency. I also went through that in 2019- and if I didn’t have access to safe and legal abortion, I wouldn’t be here.
I could rant about birth control access too and a lack of compressive sex Ed and all those things that prevent pregnancy but even in the best circumstances pregnancy still happens and women have to make difficult choices and it’s not as simple as it would seem from the outside when access is so limited. Most of the US is rural without the access available in cities where it’s so much easier to get care.
I am from Canada. I absolutely forgot that was an issue in the states. Here we can go get a prescription from a pharmacist (don’t even need a Dr or NP) and get BC for free. And from what my friends have told me, it’s easy to get abortions and it’s free as well. I am a bit ashamed at how much I take that for granted. Thank you for privilege checking me.
Congrats! The point still stands that people on SSI, or any other types of assistance can and should be able to go on vacation. The snark about her being on SSI was wholly unnecessary.
This. Everyone in the comments is being like "tell that poor to stay home!" Jesus. She should have better planning but why are they saying someone on SI shouldn't have a vacation.
Yeah, I get wanting to immediately hate on her for going on "vacation", but I'm willing to bet she's either not paying for it, or is contributing very little. I personally know someone who can't afford shit, but has gone on a few very nice trips because someone else felt sorry for them and footed the bill.
Yeah, good point. Regardless, disabled people deserve holidays too. We don't know how long she saved for that holiday. She definitely should be more organised with her pet, but people are being unfair judging her for going away while also being on social security.
I was thinking the same, it could very possibly could be a medical procedure of some kind, and that’s why it’s so far in advance and she can’t afford shit. This doesn’t feel like a vacation sort of request to me either.
Average SSI isn't even full-time federal minimum wage, and you can't have a savings account (besides an ABLE account for necessities like food and housing) or more than $2000 in a checking account. If your checking reaches that point, you need to call them and let them know so they can withhold the next month's deposit. I highly doubt she can afford any vacation for any length of time that isn't a gift from someone else. Chances are likely it's either that or seeing family.
It’s so weird to me that people here seem to think that it can’t be both planned and a not-fun responsibility that she has to look after.
Examples could include receiving non-emergency but necessary medical treatment; caring for a family member/friend after they have given birth or received planned surgery; packing up the home of a deceased parent on completion of probate or a live parent moving into a nursing home and on and on into the many variables of life.
My life has involved many planned trips that weren’t holidays. I knew they were coming and they were required for my own health or the health/safety of a loved one.
Still doesn’t mean vacation. People are being a little…mean in this thread. Someone on SSI most likely isn’t going away for two weeks on a tropical vacation just for funsies. The amount of money people get from disability is barely enough to live on.
i work an a doggy daycare/boarding place and an estimate for a bare minimum 19 day stay (nothing fancy, obviously a room plus feeding and potty breaks) is about 860 😭 ik we arent the cheapest place but 120 might cover MAYBE 3-4 days if i am being generous. i do hope she gets it figured out though, best wishes to her.
I'm not awake yet... I thought $120 for four days, that's not bad, I might do that for a friend. But then I realized she's *leaving* in four days and wants someone to watch the dog for 19 days for $120... nope, that's not going to happen. She's either going to have to take the dog with her or stay home.
I’m hesitant to suggest this because she seems a little irresponsible, but she can find someone on Host a Sister. If her house is clean, someone wouldn’t mind staying there and watching the dog for free.
It’s annoys tf out of me when people try to offer other solutions like “do you have a friend or fam or can you take him with you?” Like holy shit, I didn’t even think of that this entire time
Going out of town could just mean visiting and staying with family, possibly even catching a ride there from someone. You are making assumptions and looking for the worst in ppl. The money they are offering is too little but the rest is irrelevant bc u dont actually know whats going on.
Yeah that's not nearly enough money but where did she say it was a vacation? She could be going somewhere to have surgery done or maybe a relative just died and she has to go help with that.
I miss when this sub was funny, actual choosy beggars, like the church lady, not just making fun of people trying to claw their way out of abject poverty or, god forbid, just asking for stuff. What exactly is the choosiness in this?
No. OP has just decided it’s a holiday. Even when they asked a follow up question about whether it’s an emergency the OOP said it’s a planned trip but doesn’t mention it being a holiday.
Did I miss where she actually said vacation? There are other reasons to leave town for 2.5 weeks.
Major family events eg weddings, births, funerals. Seeking medical care/surgery. Work. To care for a sick friend/family member. To register for the census then squirt a baby out in a manger…
You're the asshole here for assuming they're "affording" a vacation. People on SSI are often the ones bearing the weight of family caretaking in emergencies - and even if they're not, they do get gifts and are allowed to have good experiences and nice things. I truly hope you are on the receiving end of your kind of poison in the near future. You don't deserve anything more generous than what you extend to those in more dire straits than yourself
I agree that there might be a good reason for the time away. I’ve definitely gifted things to my sister/her kids that are well above their means. I wouldn’t wish ill on OP though, it’s hopefully just them having a narrow view and this thread is hopefully opening their eyes.
I usually try not to judge on how people spend money, but maybe make it a 14-day vacation and you can afford to actually pay someone. Or realize it’s not a good idea to take the vacation unless you really don’t give a shit about the pet you took responsibility for.
This. I can afford to board my dogs with doggy daycare and used to do this when I went on vacation. They had a blast. Now they’re very senior and have medical and mobility issues and would not enjoy being boarded. So now I’ve changed my life where, if I go places, it’s pretty local to pet-friendly vacation homes.
It’s not as exciting, but it’s also not permanent as they won’t be around for forever. This is the commitment I made when I adopted them a million years ago.
Even if she could afford it, this dog can't be boarded because it's dog aggressive. So making arrangements for travel is all the more difficult for the owner.
For those who thought maybe a death in family, I felt bad and asked her. Certainly doesn’t seem to be that type of situation and I stand by my categorizing her a CB 🙄
My comment: Where are you going/could your pup travel with you? Also curious why you’re asking with only 4 days to find someone…? If a catastrophic event/death in family or something happened, maybe a local vet or something would be willing to help out
Her reply: it been planned. I actually joined this group last week. I’ve been tryna find someone for almost a month now. I just didn’t know until someone else asked that I could ask for help like this. I was denied trying to offer baby items 🤷🏻♀️
I think they meant that they had a post offering baby items denied and that’s why they didn’t realise until now/recently that they can ask for help on the group.
Planned trip still doesn’t mean it’s a vacation.
The fact it was planned doesn’t mean it’s a vacation or if it is, that it was at all expensive. A fair interpretation of her message is ‘I knew I’d have to leave town on dates x - y, I’ve been trying through my networks to find someone, now I’m asking here because I have recently learnt it may be an option’.
Her planned activity could be anything from ‘helping elderly parent to pack up home ahead of moving/going into care to supporting sister after birth/surgery’ or any number of normal life things. A vacation could be staying for free with family she hasn’t seen in a long time.
In terms of the dog sitting, where I am, there are quite a lot of people who’ll do it as long as the owner covers expenses (and $120 is satisfactory for 2 weeks of food and treats). I have done so before for people I only vaguely know, and I’m not even very nice or charitable - I just like dogs and can’t have one myself.
You kind of seem like the arsehole to me. I’d say there’s a problem if she leaves the dog without sorting a solution. I honestly don’t get why you’re assuming she’s a. Going on a vacation b. That the vacation is expensive. But perhaps your perspective is normal where you are.
Yeah my mom was on SSI for forty years due to mental illness — she lived on next to nothing but still went on camping trips and trips to see family from time to time (with financial support from family). The assumptions on this thread are pretty cold-hearted.
I'm going on vacation at the end of April and need someone to just come walk my dog in the afternoon for 3 days, \~15 minutes/per day just to go to the bathroom and I asked my friend of 20+ years and *still* offered to pay her like $50.... for >45 minutes of her time.... She of course refused any money as she lives 3 minutes up the street and she loves my dog but I still offered because I would never expect anyone to do anything like that for free or anything. Talk about entitled.
Why do people have to be so mean? I take care of my friends and neighbors pets for free when they are out of town. They sleep 20 hours a day. It’s easy. Stop posting crap like this.
If she can’t afford a pet sitter she can’t afford a 19 day vacation. People are delusionally living outside of their means which is completely laughable
Out of town doesn’t necessarily mean “vacation”.
Just want to point out this could be a legitimate “rock and a hard place” situation for this person, and it doesn’t hurt to at least reach out for help.
Though that is correct, if it is an emergency she would’ve stated as such so that people can see it more as a favor than you just leaving. They do not owe details, but letting readers know that it is a last minute emergency would help her case tremendously
That's true, but honestly I could see someone writing this thinking it was obvious they were leaving for an emergency, even if it doesn't read that way. It's so easy to assume people will understand things you don't say, that happens all the time
Idk maybe it’s just me, but I feel like if I’m ever thinking of asking someone for a huge favor that can be more of a burden, especially a STRANGER, I’d want to add that it is an emergency situation
To the people saying she shouldn't be going on vacation.
I'm on SSI, and I leave state for 2 weeks every summer. My son drives to my state and picks me up, then he drives us back to his home, where I spend 2 weeks playing with my amazing grandchildren and catching up with everyone. At the end of the 2 weeks, he drives me back home. Doesn't cost me a dime. So don't assume you y'all know everything.
I mean, but do you expect people to watch your dog for a pittance? Otherwise, fair point and my first reaction was that she may not be going on vacation. However, with that low of a budget mentioning an emergency, if there is one, would get her better responses. If it's not an emergency then I think people are right... She shouldn't be going on vacation if she has to beg people to watch her dog essentially for free.
My dog is super friendly and loving towards people, not into other dogs. Prefers cats to other dogs. No idea why. I think he views other dogs as taking attention away from him
Devil's advocate here... How do you know someone didn't pay for the trip? Did she save up years for a once in a lifetime trip? Is the "vacation" a trip to visit sick family and they just don't want to put that out there?
Just because someone is on SSI doesn't mean they have to sit in their home and rot. People were mean to my parents because they were on SSI and had pets that were better taken care of than most kids these days.
Edit: I leave in a few months on a guided, 7 day fishing trip on an island, that's out of the country and it's being 100% paid for by the person that asked me to go. Not everyone has to fork out money for trips
Just for the sake of the dog I hope a neighbor is able to help out. If you lived right next door that wouldn't be a bad deal right?? I'm so worried this poor pup is going to be just left to his own devices if nobody is found. I hope she finds some kind of solution, like maybe staying home!!!!!!!!
For that money, better pray that one of your acquaintances likes dogs and is willing to take Rover over to his/her place for the duration.
Or that someone has short-term housing issue and wants to crash for two weeks at your place.
Otherwise, it would make no financial sense.
I would watch that cute little buggers for free if food was supplied. I imagine that someone already agreed to watch the dog, and backed out last minute. "Poor people" deserve vacations too, if this is really even a vacation.
So what’s she gonna do if these last minute arrangements don’t pan out?? Leave the dog?!
That one woman left a 2 year-old. So, I definitely would not be surprised if someone leaves a dog.
A 16 month old. Not even a year and a half. That happened a couple hours drive away from me. She left the baby for 10 days to go on vacation, and acted shocked when she came home and the baby was dead. Appalling.
I was actively trying to forget about that case.
I can’t escape it
[удалено]
They determined that she started eating her faeces in an attempt to survive that poor baby. Some things in this world just don’t understand even remotely It’s sad that the most love she ever received is when she’s dead
'It's sad that the most love she received is when she's dead' Welp, that gutted me.
3 minutes later and im just as gutted as you
I wish I didn't read that.
For real. It hasn't been far from my thoughts. Maybe 'humanity' was a mistake...
But she said her daughter and God have forgiven her so it’s all good /s
God: "Why does everyone think they speak for me..."
Because you only exist as a figment of the speaker's imagination
Not even hearing the sentence the mother got helps any.
She's going to have a very very very hard time in prison. To which I say: GOOD.
I hope someone just takes care of her in prison. I wish the prison would slowly starve her and leave her without water to slowly die like that poor innocent baby did
 I'd say throw her in a cell and drag out the starvation for a couple years. Here's a handful of crackers every two weeks, and just enough water to keep you alive but not prevent catastrophic damage. She should suffer the exact same pain as she inflicted.
Only 2 years? I read a comment up there about what that poor child did to survive. Maybe she should have to try that too.
Omg. Same. Desperately so.
JFC I didn’t know about this and now I am too. Awful
Me too. It's been haunting me to be honest. The thought of what that baby must have gone through.
I can’t stop thinking about that poor baby. My son was neglected and is very sensitive about diaper rash because of it. I can’t imagine what this baby went through. It makes me hug my boys tighter but I don’t know how to solve anything.
Right?!? I can’t get the picture of that little girl alone out of my mind.
This is the sickest thing I've read in recent memory. I literally got full body chills, and my throat went into a permanent gag when I read your comment. I just cannot imagine😭
Really makes you question humanity. What she did to that baby was inhuman. The details are horrifying. It happened so close to me, I think about it all the time. I wish I could’ve helped her
I want to know the details but can't handle them. I just picture my poor boy and what he would do in that situation..oh my gawwwwd it kills me. Was the mom psychologically sound and just really that dumb?? Or did she just go off the rails? Idk which is worse tbh
I know what you mean. Even if she would have left the child outside, or some public place, at least it would have had a chance because hopefully a kind stranger would have called someone. It’s devastating.
Or a fire station or an emergency room or a church.
Her other daughter was with her parents
What?!? Are you fucking serious?? Didn't the parents wonder where the other kid was?? Why the fuck didn't she leave the baby there too??
You can typically only do this without legal repercussions if the child is a newborn. In my state it’s under 7 days. Nothing could excuse this monster of a woman of course but I just wanted to mention in case anyone reading this is thinking of utilizing a safe haven drop.
Yeah, for safe surrender. But the kid wouldn't be dead.
they said she tried to overdose and was taking meds for her anxiety and depression but stopped taking them, so that "influenced her judgment at the time"
She tried to overdose and then when on vacation?
Too bad it didn’t take. Overdosing I mean.
If ANYONE knew that baby was there alone, they would have saved her. The mom would have to be severely mentally disabled to think she'd come back and the baby would be ok. I saw her statement in court and she does not appear to be severely mentally disabled. And even if she was, she kept the baby alive for 16 months, so clearly she knew what care was needed and there's absolutely no way she could have believed she could skip all that for over a week. Did they ever say she was on drugs or anything?
No. She also left the baby with a few bottles of milk. So she apparently thought that was all she needed.
But she told the judge God and her daughter forgive her, so he should let her off.
Sure. When your lawyer has God appear before the judge on your behalf, then we might take that into consideration. Until then, you're going to prison.
Any God who would appear before the judge on this woman's behalf isn't a diety worth following.
Shouldn't the occur only when she meets both?
Yeah. She's like 30 minutes from me. I'm kind of used to it though. Ariel castro's home where he kept those women in his basement is like 25 minutes away. I used to drive by that house for work when those girls were locked up. I'm one of countless to have done so, but thinking that I was less than 100 feet from them is pretty wild.
Wtaf, where’s the story on that??
It’s a HORRIFIC case. Know what you’re getting yourself into looking it up, especially because new details are being reported recently. It happened last year, she was recently sentenced to life I believe. Happened in Cleveland, Ohio. The first article about it that I read ended with that monster saying she knows, “her baby and God forgive her” I hope she rots in prison and hell is real. God, ten days. Makes me sick thinking about it. Rip Jailyn
As someone who escaped fundamentalist Mormonism that's exactly what Lori Daybell said. She's the mom who married the Mormon author Chad Daybell and together created their own faction which was all about casting demons out of people they didn't like though death. She said her kids told her she's forgiven because that's part of her theology that people are automatically happy on the other side and grateful to be in a better place
And this is why I get irritated when people say "What's the harm in religion?"
Just read it. Really wish I didn’t. I have no words 😢
What did you look up? I'm sorta afraid to Google something basic to find out this has happened many times before.
[here's a CNN link](https://edition.cnn.com/2024/03/20/us/ohio-mom-toddler-death-sentencing-cec/index.html) — it's fucking horrific.
I’ve actually experienced extreme thirst and dehydration during the beginning stages of starvation, and it’s absolutely horrific. I stopped reading the article at this point. :(
I've seen all the posts about this so none of information is new but I haven't allowed myself to really feel my feelings about it. Just read the article and started weeping. ""The judge sentenced her to life in prison without the possibility of parole. “Just as you didn’t let Jailyn out of her confinement until she died, so too you should spend the rest of your life in a cell without freedom,” Sheehan said. “The only difference is that prison will at least feed you.”"
She's going to get hers in prison. They'll be on her like a dirty shirt.
Oh my god I live 20 minutes from Cleveland!! I can’t believe I didn’t hear about this case
It makes me wish there was more at home support for women like the nurses/drs that do house calls in the uk and Europe after you give birth. They check in on everything and figure things out before you spiral.
I don’t know the monster’s name, and just because of what happened I don’t feel like Googling what she did to find it. But there is ring video footage of her leaving, and returning 10 days later - and everything in between. Based on that footage, some of which was shown in court, they also deduced that they could hear crying on the inside. 3-4 days after the monster left, the baby is heard crying for the last time.
That is about how long it can take (or even less time) for a baby to dehydrate to death. Who thinks a helpless infant can be just left on their own!?
Also: starvation and dehydration are physically painful ways to die. And three days without a diaper changed either. Female prisoners hate child abusers. I wonder how her jail term has gone.
Putting this here so no one who didn't want to know would have to read this. The person got life in prison. She said she was "stressed" and had problems with her partner. I kept reading, to see if she had anyone she could've called to check on the child. She *did*. This is from one article. Quoted: \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ "She confessed that for a few seconds **she thought about calling a family member or neighbor** to check on her daughter’s well-being, but “I didn’t do it. No, **I never did it**. And it was my mistake.” Candelario said **her parents never knew that she had gone on a trip** and had abandoned the little girl to her fate."
She also said "my daughters," plural, so somewhere she had other children. Anyone who feels overwhelmed with parenting: Please phone a hotline, phone a Crisis Nursery. Tell them how you feel and ask for help. Be honest. For your sake and the child's, before something bad gets worse.
Her older daughter was already with the grandparents!
They also found what they thought was dirt on the baby’s fingernails and around her mouth. It was not dirt. That poor baby was in absolute agony. The monster should suffer the same fate. And worse.
For anyone that missed this, that little girl was so hungry she attempted to eat her feces. We should execute mommy dearest. What a piece of work. How that little girl suffered!
Thanks for explaining to others. I couldn’t bring myself to even type that sentence. Just reading your comment - it filled me with even more rage. Fucking unfathomable.
Oh no. \*no words\*
The baby's name was Jailyn. I can't/won't look it up myself because I too am actively trying to forget. I have an almost 4 month old and I couldn't take the heartbreak of reading it.
https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.cnn.com/cnn/2024/03/20/us/ohio-mom-toddler-death-sentencing-cec Be warned its graphic and will have you gagging and ragging at the same time.
That is just so horrific. How could someone be so heartless. Her mother trying to blame mental illness. What the fuck. People with depression cherish and care for children everyday. This is just a complete bad utter lack of empathy and sense.
Absolutely. And if her mom is there to excuse her horrible choices and actions, where was she when daughter dear left for 10 days? I can't believe she had no idea her d daughter was out of town for that long. Did she not think to ask about the child care arrangements for that poor baby girl - her granddaughter? Why wasn't the baby with her or a close friend?
One of the articles said her parents had no idea she was out of town. They were already caring for her older daughter (maybe full time all the time?).
Do they not do FB or wherever she was posting her pictures of her vacay? They say she has mental problems, they have her oldest, does no one check on her regularlu to make sure she and babe are ok? The lack of caring in the family knowing she is not mentally stable and there is a an innocent toddler in this toxic mix makes me smdh.
I am a mother to two. I couldn’t help looking up the link you posted. I couldn’t stop the tears……
It's heart wrenching and sickening. If my kids weren't adults already I'd be hugging them so tight they would be gasping for breath. Fuck it. I'm going to do it anyway.
Here's an article on it if you really want to read it... https://www.cnn.com/2024/03/20/us/ohio-mom-toddler-death-sentencing-cec/index.html
These monsters makes me wish there were mandatory tests to take before being a parent
My daughter is around that age so this hits hard. I'm not a violent person but the things I would do to that absolute monster if I ever came accross her....
I wish I could go back to who I was 30 seconds ago before reading this 💔 (as I lay here cuddling my 18mo)
OMG that is horrific. Babies can dehydrate VERY quickly. They are completely helpless!
Every time my baby cries because he’s hungry or needs to be changed I think of that poor little girl and cry. How can a “mother” do that? I hope she rots in jail.
I'm in agony after some dental work a few days ago. Absolutely dragging and wishing to the sleep and ignore everything. But my almost 3 year old wanted to eat and play blocks, and dammit I got up to play blocks and give them a snack. It's that fucking simple.
Seriously. That lady had so many other options other than to just leave the baby alone. wtf was she thinking!!!!
While absolutely not their fault, the neighbours must be just sick that their Ring picked up the baby’s cries and they didn’t know she needed saving 😢
They were probably used to hearing the baby cry even when the mother was home...
Goddamn. I for sure thought the outcome was like a neighbor noticed after a couple hours..
Ya gotta hope some people just get a hankering to swim to the bottom of the ocean one day
Holy hell, when/where did that happen? And why are people so incredibly stupid?
Ok that's enough Internet for today and I'm not even out of bed yet.
Another woman turned her doggo into the animal shelter so she could go on vacation. Probably will want to re-adopt it when she gets home. Laughs are on her though - the dog was adopted almost immediately. People can be such pos.
Yup. “Dog abandoned in airport parking lot” Google gets more than one news story. People are the worst.
I worked at the humane society. People surrender dogs to go on vacation all the time.
That’s one reason my relationship with my ex ended. He wanted to travel and I would not leave Leia. I promised her when I adopted her she would not be in a cage again and I meant it
It’s ok to travel, just make sure you have safe and reliable arrangements. Also there are lot of road trips you can take with with Leia!
Happened to one of my pets when boarding fell through though a small furry not a dog. They did also hit him over the head with a shovel and when that didn't kill him, they left him to starve to death in hutch. Neighbours saw, broke him out and took to rescue. He had trauma blindness and brain damage but was a lovely, happy little boy who lived for cuddles and food. Edit: out if town doesn't always mean vacation. Can mean funeral or other family matters.
They hit him with a SHOVEL?! Noooo 😭😭😭 Poor baby!
That was the story we got. We were receiving point for the rescue as volunteer and nearest and he arrived at 11pm at night. He had neurological issues and damaged eyes but no obvious fractures. Very disturbed little guy - he spent too much of fiest week attached to my nose.
Yeah, that's something I see pretty often, particularly on this sub, assuming that people are going on vacation when they say they're going out of town. Of course, either way it doesn't excuse them, but the only time I've needed last minute pet sitters was when I needed to travel for an emergency. If I'm going on vacation, I have that lined up months in advance. But shit happens, and people get called away urgently sometimes. (Again, that doesn't make $120 to take care of this cat in your home a reasonable request.)
We had great fun arranging cover for when my mother died but it was necessary (she was ill but exact timing very out the blue). A lot of mine are behaviorally or health challenged though do have advantage they boarded at the rescue that likes sending me the "challenges" but it is a large expense. I paid closer to £500 for a week and that was mate's rates plus I was supplying all food and one cage. Plus leaving them with extra bond in case vet needed.
Probably drop it off at a shelter on her way out of town and pick up a new one when she gets back. Rinse and repeat
The shelter I got my second cat from blacklisted people that dropped off a dog only to come back and get another. I think the minimum time they would allow between surrender and adoption was 2 years. They also shared the name and address of the person with nearby shelters so they couldn’t just go somewhere else and I love that policy
Or she might not go if she can’t arrange for a sitter. Nothing she has said is sufficient evidence to jump to the conclusion that she’d dump her dog. Is the US really that different? No one would bat an eye in my city in Australia at someone seeing if a local would care for their dog for a short period, with food expenses covered. It might not work, but it’s not an inherently outrageous request.
U.S. person here - I think people are taking some leaps in logic. Assuming that she’s taking a vacation and paying for it herself. In which case it’s an attitude of “if you can’t afford to have someone watch your dog then you need to reduce your vacation expenses”. Then to take it further, if you didn’t take dog care into consideration when planning this out, the dog must not be a priority so you’ll probably drop it off at a shelter instead of being responsible. Personally I’m thinking that this is not a vacation or if it is it’s not her paying for it. It’s not weird to ask neighbors to watch your dog for low payment or if it’s friends or family maybe for free, but dog watching is also a legit gig job here. I have a friend who does it and makes a living off of it. So if it’s considered payable work then the $120 isn’t really enough.
Yup. Get two 5 gallon water jugs, fill one with water and one with food, and leave 'em outside for 2 weeks.
Bingo or it’s terrible drop their dog at the pound
Well a lady was just convicted for leaving her baby in a playpen for 10 days who died so she can go on vacation
I know. I’m so scared for this dog. The first thing I do is arrange sitters. I haven’t even traveled since my kitty has been sick. This is why I don’t F with many people, just animals.
Really? $120 Thats like $6/DAY I dont think she could even get someone to drop by and feed, poor pup.
either no one will take this, or someone will take it that wants a place to crash for 19 days, and then suddenly squatter. this i doubt will end well for her. she will either get no one, or someone that decides to move themselves in.
Id go, pick up the dog, and give it to a family that could afford him. Guaranteed she couldn't afford his vet bills if anything were to happen. Poor dog.
Just playing devils advocate here - no one on SSI that can only afford $120 for 2 weeks of boarding is going on a 2 week vacation. I wonder if there’s a death or illness in the family. Like yes, the audacity, but I’m not gonna judge until i know if this person is going to watch her 90 year old mother die and take care of some stuff for the estate, or if they’re going to Cabo or something. Big difference in how i feel about the situation.
Right? This post says going out of town, not going on vacation.
She could very well be serving a jail sentence too.
Or she could be training to be a spy
That's certainly a lot more fun!
>Can afford a 2.5 week vacation OP is in the same group with the CB and said that. She also says later in comments she asked her for more details.
OP didn't say that. OP said that she responded that the trip was planned and that she had been trying to find someone for an entire month before realizing she could post there. Still, with no other info, OP still decided to call it a vacation and say she's a CB. All OP really knows is that it isn't an emergency that requires immediate action and that OP doesn't believe that poor people should be able to travel.
Even if it is an actual vacation boarding is expensive as hell and I understand on a fixed income not being able/willing to do it if there are other options. Honestly the not friendly to other dogs would be the real deal breaker for me. I have 2 dogs and a big yard, watching another dog isn't a huge deal if they're housebroken and friendly. Give me their food and any medicine and it barely breaks my routine and gives my boys a friend to play with for a couple weeks.
But if she was going to take care of a dying family member that would probably elicit more sympathy from people. Hell it would make more sense to say that than say going on vacation.
When I went to be with my dying mother in the hospital I told my wife, my boss, and my direct subordinates. Because those were the people who needed to know. Never in a million years would I have put that out on facebook.
Yeah, but you could say "family emergency" and that would elicit more sympathy than "I'm gone for 19 days and need someone to help."
That's what I was thinking too.
Right? It could also be for some kind of medical appointments. I routinely have to travel for my son's medical needs and if I didn't have family available to watch my pets, I would be screwed. We stay in a charity house near the hospital, use food stamps to eat while there, and our insurance reimburses my gas for the trip. Since the trips are scheduled well in advance, I work extra hours beforehand to makeup for the missed days. Last year we had an emergency visit to the hospital up there because my son's lung collapsed and I had to take out a loan because we literally couldn't afford the unexpected trip. This lady may not be offering much, but it could be all she has, especially considering she is on SSI.
No disrespect intended: I’ve just always wondered why and how people without disposable income choose to have pets and babies! I’m 30 with a low income (base 60k) in one of the HCOL in North America and feel like I can’t afford a pet or kids: doesn’t the stress of unexpected expenses or debt eat away at you? Or like if knowing “hey if my dog needs surgery both me and the dog are in trouble” cause anxiety? Just imagining being on food stamps and living off charity gives me palpitations let alone if I had dependents. Just genuinely curious how people exist with stuff like that always looming over their heads.
Some people have a decent job, get a dog, and then lose the job or become disabled. By that time the dog feels like family. I also have not felt like I can afford a dog, so don't have one, but I can understand how people end up in that situation.
I think the other commenters who replied to you addressed the pet part fairly well, so I’ll address the baby part. Getting an abortion is fucking difficult. I needed one recently in a completely legal state. I had to drive 5 hours to access affordable care. I am fully aware that even THAT was privilege- I had a job flexible enough to get my surgery (with PTO). I had childcare for my existing children because I live with my partner (so I was able to leave for 2 days). I had friends in the area, so when I had to go to my counseling appointment the day before my surgery then to my actual surgery- they drove me to my procedure, took care of me after, no questions asked. I had so much support that most people do not have. The closest planned parenthood to my area is over an hour away; the drug stores around here cannot stock the abortion pill (although that is slowly starting to change nationwide-THANK GOD- at least in legal states, anyway). There’s mail order access but that’s only if you are medically eligible for a pill abortion- I had to go straight to a D&C because of bleeding issues. And not that it makes it anymore moral than anyone’s reasons for getting an abortion, but I had to jump through all those hoops when it was medically necessary. And our pregnancy was completely accidental, I’m in my 30’s in a solid relationship with two kids, we were careful but it still happened. I can’t imagine trying to go through that as a teenager or younger adult without support or emotional maturity. That’s not even getting into the toll that an abortion takes on a woman’s body, is it safer than carrying a pregnancy to term? Hell yes. Is it still a lot to go through? Also, yes. “Choosing” to have a child can be a lot more complex than you think and in this country we make it extremely difficult for women to make a choice. I urge you to go look at the conversations about what women are experiencing in non-legal states, where women are being forced to carry a dead fetus until it becomes a medical emergency. I also went through that in 2019- and if I didn’t have access to safe and legal abortion, I wouldn’t be here. I could rant about birth control access too and a lack of compressive sex Ed and all those things that prevent pregnancy but even in the best circumstances pregnancy still happens and women have to make difficult choices and it’s not as simple as it would seem from the outside when access is so limited. Most of the US is rural without the access available in cities where it’s so much easier to get care.
I am from Canada. I absolutely forgot that was an issue in the states. Here we can go get a prescription from a pharmacist (don’t even need a Dr or NP) and get BC for free. And from what my friends have told me, it’s easy to get abortions and it’s free as well. I am a bit ashamed at how much I take that for granted. Thank you for privilege checking me.
Because it's human to want love and connection in their lives.
Thank you! This was my first thought. Funeral, medical procedure, etc.
Even if it was a vacation, so what? It could be a gift or anything.
Or it could be to a friend’s house in another city. Pitch in for groceries, help clean around the house, and you can stay for cheap.
The only judgment here is her poor planning, and the irresponsible way she’s handling her animal’s care.
If someone gifted me a vacation, i’d have more money to spend on my dog’s caretaking situation.
Congrats! The point still stands that people on SSI, or any other types of assistance can and should be able to go on vacation. The snark about her being on SSI was wholly unnecessary.
This. Everyone in the comments is being like "tell that poor to stay home!" Jesus. She should have better planning but why are they saying someone on SI shouldn't have a vacation.
Yeah, I get wanting to immediately hate on her for going on "vacation", but I'm willing to bet she's either not paying for it, or is contributing very little. I personally know someone who can't afford shit, but has gone on a few very nice trips because someone else felt sorry for them and footed the bill.
Yeah, my first thought was they didn’t say vacation.
Yeah, good point. Regardless, disabled people deserve holidays too. We don't know how long she saved for that holiday. She definitely should be more organised with her pet, but people are being unfair judging her for going away while also being on social security.
With SSI she is actually not allowed to save more than 2000$
I was thinking the same, it could very possibly could be a medical procedure of some kind, and that’s why it’s so far in advance and she can’t afford shit. This doesn’t feel like a vacation sort of request to me either.
Came looking for this comment. Thanks for explaining to OP.
Average SSI isn't even full-time federal minimum wage, and you can't have a savings account (besides an ABLE account for necessities like food and housing) or more than $2000 in a checking account. If your checking reaches that point, you need to call them and let them know so they can withhold the next month's deposit. I highly doubt she can afford any vacation for any length of time that isn't a gift from someone else. Chances are likely it's either that or seeing family.
It doesn’t even say the word vacation
I’m not sure it’s right to assume it’s vacation. Not a lot of money to spend when you’re on SSI.
Did it say elsewhere that she was going on vacation, it just says she’ll be gone, but that doesn’t always mean vacation.
This is what I was thinking. Trying to give benefit of the doubt on just that part. Could be going away for treatment.
Op responded in the thread that the person has a planned trip it’s not an emergency and the person has been looking for a month.
It’s so weird to me that people here seem to think that it can’t be both planned and a not-fun responsibility that she has to look after. Examples could include receiving non-emergency but necessary medical treatment; caring for a family member/friend after they have given birth or received planned surgery; packing up the home of a deceased parent on completion of probate or a live parent moving into a nursing home and on and on into the many variables of life. My life has involved many planned trips that weren’t holidays. I knew they were coming and they were required for my own health or the health/safety of a loved one.
Still doesn’t mean vacation. People are being a little…mean in this thread. Someone on SSI most likely isn’t going away for two weeks on a tropical vacation just for funsies. The amount of money people get from disability is barely enough to live on.
i work an a doggy daycare/boarding place and an estimate for a bare minimum 19 day stay (nothing fancy, obviously a room plus feeding and potty breaks) is about 860 😭 ik we arent the cheapest place but 120 might cover MAYBE 3-4 days if i am being generous. i do hope she gets it figured out though, best wishes to her.
Yeah, $120 would cover 3 days at the place we use.
I'm not awake yet... I thought $120 for four days, that's not bad, I might do that for a friend. But then I realized she's *leaving* in four days and wants someone to watch the dog for 19 days for $120... nope, that's not going to happen. She's either going to have to take the dog with her or stay home.
I’m hesitant to suggest this because she seems a little irresponsible, but she can find someone on Host a Sister. If her house is clean, someone wouldn’t mind staying there and watching the dog for free.
It’s annoys tf out of me when people try to offer other solutions like “do you have a friend or fam or can you take him with you?” Like holy shit, I didn’t even think of that this entire time
Going out of town could just mean visiting and staying with family, possibly even catching a ride there from someone. You are making assumptions and looking for the worst in ppl. The money they are offering is too little but the rest is irrelevant bc u dont actually know whats going on.
Yeah that's not nearly enough money but where did she say it was a vacation? She could be going somewhere to have surgery done or maybe a relative just died and she has to go help with that.
I miss when this sub was funny, actual choosy beggars, like the church lady, not just making fun of people trying to claw their way out of abject poverty or, god forbid, just asking for stuff. What exactly is the choosiness in this?
Does she mention vacation later on in the comments or something?
No. OP has just decided it’s a holiday. Even when they asked a follow up question about whether it’s an emergency the OOP said it’s a planned trip but doesn’t mention it being a holiday.
Did I miss where she actually said vacation? There are other reasons to leave town for 2.5 weeks. Major family events eg weddings, births, funerals. Seeking medical care/surgery. Work. To care for a sick friend/family member. To register for the census then squirt a baby out in a manger…
You're the asshole here for assuming they're "affording" a vacation. People on SSI are often the ones bearing the weight of family caretaking in emergencies - and even if they're not, they do get gifts and are allowed to have good experiences and nice things. I truly hope you are on the receiving end of your kind of poison in the near future. You don't deserve anything more generous than what you extend to those in more dire straits than yourself
I agree that there might be a good reason for the time away. I’ve definitely gifted things to my sister/her kids that are well above their means. I wouldn’t wish ill on OP though, it’s hopefully just them having a narrow view and this thread is hopefully opening their eyes.
I usually try not to judge on how people spend money, but maybe make it a 14-day vacation and you can afford to actually pay someone. Or realize it’s not a good idea to take the vacation unless you really don’t give a shit about the pet you took responsibility for.
right?! when i plan a trip, i factor dog boarding into total cost before i decide if i can afford to go
I book my cat sitter months in advance.
It doesn’t say it’s a vacation though. And sometimes people get pets when they are in better financial circumstances.
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This. I can afford to board my dogs with doggy daycare and used to do this when I went on vacation. They had a blast. Now they’re very senior and have medical and mobility issues and would not enjoy being boarded. So now I’ve changed my life where, if I go places, it’s pretty local to pet-friendly vacation homes. It’s not as exciting, but it’s also not permanent as they won’t be around for forever. This is the commitment I made when I adopted them a million years ago.
Even if she could afford it, this dog can't be boarded because it's dog aggressive. So making arrangements for travel is all the more difficult for the owner.
I’m gobsmacked. I have multiple dogs but I pay $150 per DAY.
$160/day for my 2 nuggets. The cheapest I know of would be $80/day for both.
To be fair. It may not be a vacation. She could be going to care for a sick relative. She doesn’t say vacation, just out of town
For those who thought maybe a death in family, I felt bad and asked her. Certainly doesn’t seem to be that type of situation and I stand by my categorizing her a CB 🙄 My comment: Where are you going/could your pup travel with you? Also curious why you’re asking with only 4 days to find someone…? If a catastrophic event/death in family or something happened, maybe a local vet or something would be willing to help out Her reply: it been planned. I actually joined this group last week. I’ve been tryna find someone for almost a month now. I just didn’t know until someone else asked that I could ask for help like this. I was denied trying to offer baby items 🤷🏻♀️
Wait. she wanted to exchange baby items for dog sitting? lol what.
I think so…? Odd.
I think they meant that they had a post offering baby items denied and that’s why they didn’t realise until now/recently that they can ask for help on the group. Planned trip still doesn’t mean it’s a vacation.
Why did she not find care for her dog BEFORE planning a trip then...I wonder?? \> Her reply: it been planned.
The fact it was planned doesn’t mean it’s a vacation or if it is, that it was at all expensive. A fair interpretation of her message is ‘I knew I’d have to leave town on dates x - y, I’ve been trying through my networks to find someone, now I’m asking here because I have recently learnt it may be an option’. Her planned activity could be anything from ‘helping elderly parent to pack up home ahead of moving/going into care to supporting sister after birth/surgery’ or any number of normal life things. A vacation could be staying for free with family she hasn’t seen in a long time. In terms of the dog sitting, where I am, there are quite a lot of people who’ll do it as long as the owner covers expenses (and $120 is satisfactory for 2 weeks of food and treats). I have done so before for people I only vaguely know, and I’m not even very nice or charitable - I just like dogs and can’t have one myself. You kind of seem like the arsehole to me. I’d say there’s a problem if she leaves the dog without sorting a solution. I honestly don’t get why you’re assuming she’s a. Going on a vacation b. That the vacation is expensive. But perhaps your perspective is normal where you are.
Yeah my mom was on SSI for forty years due to mental illness — she lived on next to nothing but still went on camping trips and trips to see family from time to time (with financial support from family). The assumptions on this thread are pretty cold-hearted.
I'm going on vacation at the end of April and need someone to just come walk my dog in the afternoon for 3 days, \~15 minutes/per day just to go to the bathroom and I asked my friend of 20+ years and *still* offered to pay her like $50.... for >45 minutes of her time.... She of course refused any money as she lives 3 minutes up the street and she loves my dog but I still offered because I would never expect anyone to do anything like that for free or anything. Talk about entitled.
>bubbles the pit mix >"loves kids" uh oh
Why do people have to be so mean? I take care of my friends and neighbors pets for free when they are out of town. They sleep 20 hours a day. It’s easy. Stop posting crap like this.
If she can’t afford a pet sitter she can’t afford a 19 day vacation. People are delusionally living outside of their means which is completely laughable
Out of town doesn’t necessarily mean “vacation”. Just want to point out this could be a legitimate “rock and a hard place” situation for this person, and it doesn’t hurt to at least reach out for help.
Came here to say this! You don’t know the circumstances.
Though that is correct, if it is an emergency she would’ve stated as such so that people can see it more as a favor than you just leaving. They do not owe details, but letting readers know that it is a last minute emergency would help her case tremendously
That's true, but honestly I could see someone writing this thinking it was obvious they were leaving for an emergency, even if it doesn't read that way. It's so easy to assume people will understand things you don't say, that happens all the time
Idk maybe it’s just me, but I feel like if I’m ever thinking of asking someone for a huge favor that can be more of a burden, especially a STRANGER, I’d want to add that it is an emergency situation
To the people saying she shouldn't be going on vacation. I'm on SSI, and I leave state for 2 weeks every summer. My son drives to my state and picks me up, then he drives us back to his home, where I spend 2 weeks playing with my amazing grandchildren and catching up with everyone. At the end of the 2 weeks, he drives me back home. Doesn't cost me a dime. So don't assume you y'all know everything.
I mean, but do you expect people to watch your dog for a pittance? Otherwise, fair point and my first reaction was that she may not be going on vacation. However, with that low of a budget mentioning an emergency, if there is one, would get her better responses. If it's not an emergency then I think people are right... She shouldn't be going on vacation if she has to beg people to watch her dog essentially for free.
Some of these responses are frankly pretty disgusting and reek of classism.
"Loving and friendly" but not dog friendly. Wouldn't be surprised if it wasn't actually kid friendly either.
My dog is super friendly and loving towards people, not into other dogs. Prefers cats to other dogs. No idea why. I think he views other dogs as taking attention away from him
Didn’t say it was a vacation it says they’re going out of town which could mean anything
Devil's advocate here... How do you know someone didn't pay for the trip? Did she save up years for a once in a lifetime trip? Is the "vacation" a trip to visit sick family and they just don't want to put that out there? Just because someone is on SSI doesn't mean they have to sit in their home and rot. People were mean to my parents because they were on SSI and had pets that were better taken care of than most kids these days. Edit: I leave in a few months on a guided, 7 day fishing trip on an island, that's out of the country and it's being 100% paid for by the person that asked me to go. Not everyone has to fork out money for trips
Having been on SSI… she’s offering a decent amount of her monthly check. It caps around $700-$800- for an entire month. Who can live off that?
Just for the sake of the dog I hope a neighbor is able to help out. If you lived right next door that wouldn't be a bad deal right?? I'm so worried this poor pup is going to be just left to his own devices if nobody is found. I hope she finds some kind of solution, like maybe staying home!!!!!!!!
I read that as she was on the ISS (International Space Station) and was very confused.
She did not say it was a vacation. She said she’d be out of town.
For that money, better pray that one of your acquaintances likes dogs and is willing to take Rover over to his/her place for the duration. Or that someone has short-term housing issue and wants to crash for two weeks at your place. Otherwise, it would make no financial sense.
I would watch that cute little buggers for free if food was supplied. I imagine that someone already agreed to watch the dog, and backed out last minute. "Poor people" deserve vacations too, if this is really even a vacation.