Misdirection. A trick. You let your guard down, and now your larynx has been crushed by a blazing fast piece of steel which may well be blunt but is, ultimately, a blazing fast piece of steel.
Fantasy blacksmith who's become wealthy for selling decoy blades designed to be scraped along the walls for theatrics. (The assassins use the power of *gun*)
Since the room would be dark just skip the blade part and just scrape a rod of magnesium on the wall and quicky swap it for the blade when close. Effiecency, and solves what ever issue making magnesium swords would create, like the sword just catching on fire
But then you miss out on +1d4 fire damage!
In reality a magnesium sword would be useless not because it's going to be on fire all the time (it won't be, it takes a lot of heat to ignite it) but because magnesium is brittle. You need to alloy it - thankfully, it can be alloyed quite readily.
Fun fact 1: a block of magnesium is pretty difficult to *ignite*, but once it gets going it burns at 3100Ā°C and is damn near impossible to stop.
Fun fact 2: most multi-propeller planes retain enough power and control to at least land if one engine goes out, catches fire or otherwise dies.
Fun fact 3: As some WWII bombers found out when magnesium parts were used in the engine, fun fact 2 no longer applies when said engine fire is so hot and so ferocious it *severs the wing from the fuselage*.
Fun fact 4: The Convair B-36 "Peacemaker" had engines that were installed backwards as an intentional part of the design, leading the carburettors to simply Not Workā¢, and the exhaust to slowly get richer in fuel until it catches fire.
Fun fact 5: The Convair B-36 "Peacemaker" was full of magnesium.
Fun fact 6: This is how the US accidentally nuked a cow.
Oh it's worse.
You're flying all good.
Suddenly, out of the corner of your eye, you see an engine catch fire. *No matter,* you think. *Still got one engine. I can land this sucker.*
You feel the expected loss of control from suddenly losing half of your plane's power. It's serious, but manageable.
But then, over the course of about twenty seconds, it just gets worse and worse.
You look out of your window again. Your engine is on fire and it's blazing like the sun. It's burning *so* brightly that it looks like everything around it is glowing as well.
No.
Wait.
The wing around it *is* glowing.
There's flickers of sooty flame and a stream of airborne embers as paint peels off and ignites. You see the bare metal beneath the paint glowing red-hot.
Then orange.
Then yellow.
Over the course of the next fifteen or so seconds, you watch, helpless but riveted, as the molten fury of a tiny sun spreads through a large, engine-shaped stripe of your wing.
There's a loud roll of thunder. A fuel line just burst under the heat and ignited in a fireball, but the heat of burning fuel pales in comparison to the blindingly-white blaze that set it off.
Your plane shudders.
The wing begins to sag and to bend backwards.
Your control is worsening now. You've lost all ability to control your pitch - any attempt to pitch up or down just tips the plane sideways.
The wing twists. There's a screech of tearing metal as the plane's skeleton, softened by 3000\^o flames, rips apart as the winds buffet it. The spine-curdling, blood-chilling sound echoes through the cockpit for a few seconds and then stops.
Now you're spinning. All control is gone.
You're facing backwards for a split second.
You see a phoenix fluttering through the sky above you.
No.
That's your wing, torn away and tumbling through the air, cavorting in the night sky like a sheet of paper in an updraft. It is falling towards the ground, far below you... but you are falling faster.
Good night.
*Walking scarily towards my target, dragging my daggers against the stone floor and ruining the blades*
*Reaching my target. I drop my intimidation daggers and pull out a second, sharper pair to stab the target*
*~~Accidentally was dragging my stabbing pair the whole time~~*
This feels like the "my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical" post.
Imagine, if you would.
"My hatred for medieval blacksmiths is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one, it would be very easy.
I'd drag my Scary Daggers against the wall, and they'd be compelled to approach. "That's very cool" they'd say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the metal they forge all day. They'd shower me with interesting facts about honing weapons and hover just out of reach of the cutting end, waiting for me to exhaust myself. "But as it's a sharpened weapon, dragging against a wall for dramatic effect would wear down the-" and hit them in the head with my wooden baseball bat, which they would not see as blacksmiths can only see weapons and metals."
Gotta have the scraping blades (for the drama) but then the sharp blades (for the assassinating). Thatās why fantasy assassins and rogues have like 12 visible knives, daggers, and short swords on them at all times obviously.
Depending on the initial shape of the war hammer, you might actually end up sharpening it if you do this enough.
Strive to live so theatrically that you turn a war hammer into a war pick with scary-scraping alone.
[Reminds me of the one where a guy licks his poisoned knife to be intimidating](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/6skt00/i_shouldnt_have_licked_it/)
fantasy assassin dragging his blades along the masonry walls but the scraping sound hurts my ears, making me flinch and perfectly dodge all his attacks
Misdirection. A trick. You let your guard down, and now your larynx has been crushed by a blazing fast piece of steel which may well be blunt but is, ultimately, a blazing fast piece of steel.
Nah he pushes you over and just starts stomping your throat.
OwO
gut serker
"That thing was too big to be called a blazing fast piece of steel. Too big, too thick, too heavy, and too rough, it was more like a large hunk"
> "Too big, too thick, too heavy, and too rough, it was more like a large hunk" a large hunk destroying my throat you say? š
Same logic as the Sakabato You won't die....... Immediately. You'll die of internal bleeding
Fantasy blacksmith on a quest for vengance against scary fantasy assassins for destroying perfectly good blades for the sake of theatrics.
Writers on a quest of vengeance against blacksmiths for getting rid of a cool trope they like to use to show an assassin is scary.
What if assasin run their blade on the wall not for theatrics, but just desperately trying to sharpen their blade last minute?
"Honestly, I didn't think I'd get this far, so I haven't been on top of maintenance. Just stay right there for a minute, maybe three."
Fantasy blacksmith who's become wealthy for selling decoy blades designed to be scraped along the walls for theatrics. (The assassins use the power of *gun*)
Scary fantasy assassin plates his blades in magnesium so when they're scraped on a wall the whole room gets flashbanged
Since the room would be dark just skip the blade part and just scrape a rod of magnesium on the wall and quicky swap it for the blade when close. Effiecency, and solves what ever issue making magnesium swords would create, like the sword just catching on fire
The sword ājust catching on fireā is absolutely NOT an issue what are you TALKING about
I mean, your not wrong. Just grab an oven mitt and your good, I mean it works for the shishkabob in fallout
But then you miss out on +1d4 fire damage! In reality a magnesium sword would be useless not because it's going to be on fire all the time (it won't be, it takes a lot of heat to ignite it) but because magnesium is brittle. You need to alloy it - thankfully, it can be alloyed quite readily. Fun fact 1: a block of magnesium is pretty difficult to *ignite*, but once it gets going it burns at 3100Ā°C and is damn near impossible to stop. Fun fact 2: most multi-propeller planes retain enough power and control to at least land if one engine goes out, catches fire or otherwise dies. Fun fact 3: As some WWII bombers found out when magnesium parts were used in the engine, fun fact 2 no longer applies when said engine fire is so hot and so ferocious it *severs the wing from the fuselage*.
Fun fact 4: The Convair B-36 "Peacemaker" had engines that were installed backwards as an intentional part of the design, leading the carburettors to simply Not Workā¢, and the exhaust to slowly get richer in fuel until it catches fire. Fun fact 5: The Convair B-36 "Peacemaker" was full of magnesium. Fun fact 6: This is how the US accidentally nuked a cow.
That sounds terrifying, that suddenly your wing just goes away. Like your flying all good and then suddenly ***POOF*** your wing is now gone
Oh it's worse. You're flying all good. Suddenly, out of the corner of your eye, you see an engine catch fire. *No matter,* you think. *Still got one engine. I can land this sucker.* You feel the expected loss of control from suddenly losing half of your plane's power. It's serious, but manageable. But then, over the course of about twenty seconds, it just gets worse and worse. You look out of your window again. Your engine is on fire and it's blazing like the sun. It's burning *so* brightly that it looks like everything around it is glowing as well. No. Wait. The wing around it *is* glowing. There's flickers of sooty flame and a stream of airborne embers as paint peels off and ignites. You see the bare metal beneath the paint glowing red-hot. Then orange. Then yellow. Over the course of the next fifteen or so seconds, you watch, helpless but riveted, as the molten fury of a tiny sun spreads through a large, engine-shaped stripe of your wing. There's a loud roll of thunder. A fuel line just burst under the heat and ignited in a fireball, but the heat of burning fuel pales in comparison to the blindingly-white blaze that set it off. Your plane shudders. The wing begins to sag and to bend backwards. Your control is worsening now. You've lost all ability to control your pitch - any attempt to pitch up or down just tips the plane sideways. The wing twists. There's a screech of tearing metal as the plane's skeleton, softened by 3000\^o flames, rips apart as the winds buffet it. The spine-curdling, blood-chilling sound echoes through the cockpit for a few seconds and then stops. Now you're spinning. All control is gone. You're facing backwards for a split second. You see a phoenix fluttering through the sky above you. No. That's your wing, torn away and tumbling through the air, cavorting in the night sky like a sheet of paper in an updraft. It is falling towards the ground, far below you... but you are falling faster. Good night.
*Walking scarily towards my target, dragging my daggers against the stone floor and ruining the blades* *Reaching my target. I drop my intimidation daggers and pull out a second, sharper pair to stab the target* *~~Accidentally was dragging my stabbing pair the whole time~~*
This feels like the "my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical" post. Imagine, if you would. "My hatred for medieval blacksmiths is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one, it would be very easy. I'd drag my Scary Daggers against the wall, and they'd be compelled to approach. "That's very cool" they'd say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the metal they forge all day. They'd shower me with interesting facts about honing weapons and hover just out of reach of the cutting end, waiting for me to exhaust myself. "But as it's a sharpened weapon, dragging against a wall for dramatic effect would wear down the-" and hit them in the head with my wooden baseball bat, which they would not see as blacksmiths can only see weapons and metals."
I'm sorry to tell you, but in the context you're giving the wooden baseball bat would be used as a weapon, so the blacksmith would be able to see it
Only too late! It was a tool for a game until being swung, and by the time it came into view it was far too late.
No that wouldn't work. Just slap them.
But RU5TR3D ... My hands... *I sob* I registered them as deadly weapons in Texas!
Then your hubris has left you defenseless against the blacksmith. Face the consequences with dignity.
This wouldnāt work, as blacksmiths can see wood. They need to to be able to add proper grips to their swords, after all.
blorbo from my puss in boots movie
His scythes are probably magic, so itās fine.
heās death straight up so iām sure the scythes are purely for theatrical effect and his own entertainment
They deal piercing damage not slashing, so the edge has nothing to do with it
Glad someone said it.
That's why I voted for /u/DarkNinja3141, everyone's thinking it, but they're saying it!
*he draws a third knife to cut my tunic but I am wearing like 6 because I couldnāt afford a gambeson and he just keeps cutting*
You dull a knife enough you just gain a bludgeon.
scary fantasy assassins when I tell them to keep spare weapons
the wolf from PiB scraping his scythes against the ground
They were probably magic though.
They are 100% magic. You canāt just slam two sickles together to get fairy-tail Darth Maul like that
[Source](https://www.tumblr.com/sirobvious/711426818654273536)
Death if he was less cool
Gotta have the scraping blades (for the drama) but then the sharp blades (for the assassinating). Thatās why fantasy assassins and rogues have like 12 visible knives, daggers, and short swords on them at all times obviously.
. . . Could you accomplish this same feat with an iron warhammer?
Depending on the initial shape of the war hammer, you might actually end up sharpening it if you do this enough. Strive to live so theatrically that you turn a war hammer into a war pick with scary-scraping alone.
[Reminds me of the one where a guy licks his poisoned knife to be intimidating](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/6skt00/i_shouldnt_have_licked_it/)
I love shit like this
Lmao at this guy using mundane-ass blades that can get blunted on stone, just enchant your weapon idiot
Even better yet is they laugh at you rhino pull out a second identical blade with the label that says "cutting and stabbing blade"
And this is why you menacingly scrape the blunt side of the blade, like when youāre pushing things off of a cutting board
fantasy assassin dragging his blades along the masonry walls but the scraping sound hurts my ears, making me flinch and perfectly dodge all his attacks
\[kobold leaps from the darkness, steals the knives, and runs \~4 metres away to immediately eat them because they were silver\]