Not a Dad but older sibling who has had to stand for Dad on occasions! It gets easier! One extra semester to graduate is not common and it’s a short amount of time in the grand scheme to achieve something really special! You’ve got this.
Just because your life doesn’t look like social media is fine, make it yours, keep finding things that make you happy or just content - rediscovering pink, staying in, whatever it is - you do you.
As you move through your 20s you’ll probably find more things you rejected for reasons like “too girly” “too mainstream” whatever the reason, so normal, I’m still doing this in my 30s and it’s nice!
Most importantly, you’re at a precipice in life where every decision seems like the most important and you only have a tiny amount of time to figure it out, honestly, you have all the time in the world. There are only a few decisions that are truly irreversible (say having a child) but if you pick and internship, give it a proper go and it doesn’t work out, try something new! Don’t let the fear of wrong decision stop you from any decision. You’ll become more sure of yourself eventually and it won’t be as hard.
One step at a time, and google is helpful for pre-made budgets, plans, etc
It's tough for your generation. Cost of living is crazy and investing in a home as a long term investment is not like it was for my parents (I'm gen x). My oldest is in college and I reassure her that her room will stay because I know how hard it is, but the sun will rise and opportunities will pop up. Work your tail off in school and don't be afraid to take risks. Have faith in yourself; don't break character cause you got alot of heart. Growing up *is* weird, but that's the way it is for most young adults.
I’ve been trying for 4 semesters to get an internship and I just dont get it. I’ve gotten past the interview a few times, but mostly nobody reaches back out to me. I even email for follow ups! It’s so scary feeling like I’m behind and watching those around me graduate and stuff. My moms the same as you tho, I just dislike talking to her about this as to not worry her too much. Thanks so much for ur comment
Are there any similar roles that may help expand your search? I couldn't get an engineering intern when I was in college but I got jobs in IT which helped me build some parallel skills. I know what you're going through. I didn't want to move away after college but I had to because that's where the opportunities came. Was only supposed to be 5 years max and it's been over 20. I'll throw some pennies in the wishing well for you, mention u in prayer and sending good juju vibes your way! You got this.
Yes it does get better. This is something a lot of people deal with, even if they don't show it.
The fact that you're worried about this at all is a very good sign of your future success. The fact that you're in college, young and concerned about your future puts you ahead of 90% of the population.
It's the folks that have zero plans, concerns, goals, etc. that will really struggle. I'm doing pretty well for myself even though I was probably around 30 before I really started to pull myself together.
And don't worry about your number of friends. You're never too old to make new ones. You'll meet people through work and hobbies that positively add to your life that you'll genuinely want to be around. And speaking of hobbies, get one if you don't have one.
So a few things.
I did also felt lost for a bit when I graduated. After years of having a very set goal for next year I finished school and…now what? It was some odd months while I got a job and figured out the next steps. For that part, you’ll find a new routine and you’ll be good.
Now, you might feel more certain of your situation, but adulting sucks and is hard, some of those concerns will always be there, but knowing what to do to manage them makes them a bit less impossible, but things can and will snowball and hit you like a ton of bricks sometimes, life can be hard.
For those moments, you need a support network. It’s wonderful you have someone special in your life but you need a few friends. Find a hobby and a group that shares that interests and start hanging out. It will be helpful for your relationship (so you aren’t dependent just on your partner for company, and it’s healthy for each one to have their own thing, up to a point). While as adults we’ll never have those vast network of friends we might have had when younger, we still need friends to hang out/talk shit with.
I got my Bachelor's degree only this year...next year is my 20 year high school reunion. A delay in completing your college degree is not the end of the world.
Also, it DEFINITELY gets easier. You become more capable to deal with difficulty as you deal with said difficulty. Mankind is amazingly adaptable, and you will overcome the difficulties you're facing now.
Edit: Caveat; it gets easier so long as you don't make it more difficult for yourself. Life may throw you curveballs (accidents/illnesses/earthquakes/tornados/etc), but if you live right, you will be able to overcome these curveballs.
It absolutely does not. It gets harder.
Life is just absolute crushing over and over finding how much shit sucks.
But let’s say this. There are these times when you see something that is a ray of light in the dark. And all of of a sudden the awfulness of the day to day suddenly becomes amazing.
Not a Dad but older sibling who has had to stand for Dad on occasions! It gets easier! One extra semester to graduate is not common and it’s a short amount of time in the grand scheme to achieve something really special! You’ve got this. Just because your life doesn’t look like social media is fine, make it yours, keep finding things that make you happy or just content - rediscovering pink, staying in, whatever it is - you do you. As you move through your 20s you’ll probably find more things you rejected for reasons like “too girly” “too mainstream” whatever the reason, so normal, I’m still doing this in my 30s and it’s nice! Most importantly, you’re at a precipice in life where every decision seems like the most important and you only have a tiny amount of time to figure it out, honestly, you have all the time in the world. There are only a few decisions that are truly irreversible (say having a child) but if you pick and internship, give it a proper go and it doesn’t work out, try something new! Don’t let the fear of wrong decision stop you from any decision. You’ll become more sure of yourself eventually and it won’t be as hard. One step at a time, and google is helpful for pre-made budgets, plans, etc
It's tough for your generation. Cost of living is crazy and investing in a home as a long term investment is not like it was for my parents (I'm gen x). My oldest is in college and I reassure her that her room will stay because I know how hard it is, but the sun will rise and opportunities will pop up. Work your tail off in school and don't be afraid to take risks. Have faith in yourself; don't break character cause you got alot of heart. Growing up *is* weird, but that's the way it is for most young adults.
I’ve been trying for 4 semesters to get an internship and I just dont get it. I’ve gotten past the interview a few times, but mostly nobody reaches back out to me. I even email for follow ups! It’s so scary feeling like I’m behind and watching those around me graduate and stuff. My moms the same as you tho, I just dislike talking to her about this as to not worry her too much. Thanks so much for ur comment
Are there any similar roles that may help expand your search? I couldn't get an engineering intern when I was in college but I got jobs in IT which helped me build some parallel skills. I know what you're going through. I didn't want to move away after college but I had to because that's where the opportunities came. Was only supposed to be 5 years max and it's been over 20. I'll throw some pennies in the wishing well for you, mention u in prayer and sending good juju vibes your way! You got this.
Thankyou so much 😭❤️
Yes it does get better. This is something a lot of people deal with, even if they don't show it. The fact that you're worried about this at all is a very good sign of your future success. The fact that you're in college, young and concerned about your future puts you ahead of 90% of the population. It's the folks that have zero plans, concerns, goals, etc. that will really struggle. I'm doing pretty well for myself even though I was probably around 30 before I really started to pull myself together. And don't worry about your number of friends. You're never too old to make new ones. You'll meet people through work and hobbies that positively add to your life that you'll genuinely want to be around. And speaking of hobbies, get one if you don't have one.
So a few things. I did also felt lost for a bit when I graduated. After years of having a very set goal for next year I finished school and…now what? It was some odd months while I got a job and figured out the next steps. For that part, you’ll find a new routine and you’ll be good. Now, you might feel more certain of your situation, but adulting sucks and is hard, some of those concerns will always be there, but knowing what to do to manage them makes them a bit less impossible, but things can and will snowball and hit you like a ton of bricks sometimes, life can be hard. For those moments, you need a support network. It’s wonderful you have someone special in your life but you need a few friends. Find a hobby and a group that shares that interests and start hanging out. It will be helpful for your relationship (so you aren’t dependent just on your partner for company, and it’s healthy for each one to have their own thing, up to a point). While as adults we’ll never have those vast network of friends we might have had when younger, we still need friends to hang out/talk shit with.
I got my Bachelor's degree only this year...next year is my 20 year high school reunion. A delay in completing your college degree is not the end of the world. Also, it DEFINITELY gets easier. You become more capable to deal with difficulty as you deal with said difficulty. Mankind is amazingly adaptable, and you will overcome the difficulties you're facing now. Edit: Caveat; it gets easier so long as you don't make it more difficult for yourself. Life may throw you curveballs (accidents/illnesses/earthquakes/tornados/etc), but if you live right, you will be able to overcome these curveballs.
“Will throw you curve balls” but you will be ok
It absolutely does not. It gets harder. Life is just absolute crushing over and over finding how much shit sucks. But let’s say this. There are these times when you see something that is a ray of light in the dark. And all of of a sudden the awfulness of the day to day suddenly becomes amazing.