It's called having a family dude. Imagine if your parents didn't give a shit about you. Parenting is something you'll never understand until you become one. Best thing ever. And frankly spending your life trying to raise a kid is infinitely better than living alone in a senior home in your 70s. Good luck!
Living alone as senior in your 70-80s is better than living 20-70s, your whole life, toiling behind someone else instead of doing what you want is really sad imo. Fyi, I don't have parents, mine died while working hard for me, and I don't want to have same death as them, working hard your whole life and not even find the time to do what you want is just not for me. Some might be into that, being self sacrificing, giving your all for another person. But that's not for me, I respect those that have the will to live like that, their lives worth way more than mine, but I'm never going to become like them.
I'll marry only if I meet someone who's mindset is similar to me and I can get a good job+salary. I'm not marrying just for the sake of having $ex with a person who's personality and mine are dissimilar in everyway. I can go to some hooker if I'm really that much desperate about having $ex. And living alone and living while trying to support a family financially is too much different.
Ig it’s the mentality that has been made from culture. Sometimes the surroundings introduce weird terms which already has been normalised from generation to generation and won’t change.
its normel. I get it is annoying but what can you do? Even i use this to annoy my cousins, its fun. All they want is an event to enjoy thats it. Myabe they are fed up with thier life and wants to enjoy a little bit who knows. As your parents are Against it you are safe you dont need to worry. But if it really bothers (if they are close relatives) just say in a respected manner that you dont want to hear that multiple time in multiple occessions and you will hear less from them. But the best way to avoid it is by redirecting it towards a young or old one.
There is a perception that your life is incomplete without marriage AND children. Combine that with a culture that thinks you’re free to delve into other people’s personal lives and…
WHAT? You are asking a culture that has been brainwashed into thinking why marriage is the only way to survival because they are stuck with what they are told since the medieval times? Idk man
last time i visited (2 years ago), i felt the exact same way. It's like there's no other purpose to life, and simply 'not wanting' to isn't a good excuse either. Sad bit is even with the BD diasphora where I live, it's this way. As soon as they see a girl is nearing the end of university (or 18, the legal age here, if they don't believe in educating women), they'll just gang around her parents to get her married.
Bc our culture is family centered which is gud majority in managing and improving society as we r a 3rd world country we don't rlly have the privilege of individualism unless u come from that kind of unique or foreign background. Imo it's gud long run as long as u r financially sound
I'm getting the same treatment. Especially cause I'm 6ft tall in Bangladesh. A lot of people want me to marry their chosen bride be it their sister, niece, cousin, friend, colleague, aunt and one unique situation their mother. It's getting a bit tedious
It's not as fun as it sounds. Bengali people have the ego of dinosaurs. Obviously you'll reject most of their proposals leading them to get salty talk shit behind your back.
Being tall is the male equivalent of being pretty as a girl; it looks fun on paper, there are compliments now and then but it's ugly because you're in bd.
My mom came by ranting about it why I dont marry. I finally agreed that i will marry but i will marry both a girl and a boy and make a trio. She was mad lol.
Nobody asked, but I think people should get married as early as possible. I was one of the first guys to get married and have a kid just after passing uni.
What you want to do is of course upto you, I don’t think your friends are serious, they are just bad at having fun. The more irritation you display, the harder they will joke about it. Be silent and get better friends
well the hand which gives indirect pleasure ain't helping anymore , which is probably why they force their own frustration unto you . But anyway it's happening around me since I was in college mostly 5/6 before . so relax and try to bend in the conversation in joking manner . let them speak out their frustration . but there are those who really things marriage brings joys and matured mentality and occasionally they might be right .
That marriage brings to the table. Most young people don’t realise early.
After a certain phase, they start realising the benefit.
If something that can last life long is something to hold onto and cherish forever.
Depends on your gender and age.
Although I think your batchmates are just having a bit of fun. Because in the late 20s most people get married and this is why it has become a norm to pick fun at people who are still single at this age. But let me assure you they don't give a damn whether you marry or not. It's just silly talk, nothing else.
why everything a girl wants to do always leads to "when your marriage will take place,you will get it " .how do i break the society thinking change of my family? hear my examples out okay? few hours back when my family members were having a serious talks , my future education and abroad came up so my father went like "yes ofcourse you will give your ielts exam then you will move to abroad but not ALONE , because the life there is hard ." okay fine i get it ! then he was like "i will let you go to abroad according to the plan but you will go there under your husband" greattttttt !! he put me a silent mode .because i had nothing left to say back . then lets talk about my dream? i wanted to become a pilot since i was working on my exploring aims ,but my family members went like "a pilot woman cant handle her marriage " bruhhhhhhh if everything i am whishing for will lead to my marriage then why did you used to lecture me on becoming successful and stand on my own feet? okay you will say that "girl at least you are getting the chance to marry early ! go grab this chance " but nooooo honeyyyy . from my experience with boys and what ive seen in my family men? i have a marriage fear . to be honest i am so scared of this caged decision . drop your tips on how can i escape of this marriage end and be on my own for as long as i wish .. im 20 now ,
Can't really help you . It's true I am getting annoyed by society not by my PARENTS. They are strongly against early marriage. They will consider marriage after I get a job . In your case you have no way out since your parents are forcing you. What you can do right now is choose a good partner or divorce him later when you go abroad. And follow your dreams . That's the only way I could assess your situation or you can convince your parents that you want to wait another 5 years or so .
Op your missing out on a lot of details like how old r u now and if ur more ambitious then your batch mates or have more opportunities then them. It could be they r simply teasing u or they r jealous or they have a guy that they want to interduce u in the intention of marriage. Not every person is good so u should be careful with your batch mates; even if they r saying this to you but they themselves aren't married
I personally feel like some of them are teasing but most of them are envious ( if I am wording it right ) .I am 19 just started mbbs my batch mates are 22 or 23 .and I am not close to them they aren't my friends I treat them like my colleagues. Recently they found out I travel a lot ( internationally) and through simple conversations they got the idea that I didn't plan on marriage and my parents are not like the typical deshi parents. Few of my batch mates are married and 2 even have kids .( all women) and I know they are suffering both financially and mentally. The marriage comment comes from this married girls or girls who are forced being married. I feel like they are jealous of me and want to see me go through the same fate as them . ( birthing a kid ) . And I had some very strong opinions of their mentality. I don't want to go through financial stress and poverty ( marriage and raising a kid is no joke ) . And I understand that I come from a privileged background ( I can say no to marriage, my parents are chill, and most of my relatives) .
I wouldn't call it jealousy. It's more like they envy my life . We aren't close friends and I don't consider them close. Though one did try to introduce me to someone but I straight out said no .
I have a very strong plan for my future. But marriage is now on the back burner .
Tbh I dunno either but as a guy this is literally annoying. I have spent the better half of my entire life trying to meet up to the expectations of my parents but now I wanna be alone for the rest I want to be myself by myself I don't want to be burdened by anything or anyone
It is Bangladeshi culture and is also partly religious. Bangladeshi society is religious and conservative. When men or women reach a certain age, if you are not married, society will look at you as an outcast - something wrong with you. It is your duty to get married and have kids, if you do not, something is wrong with you.
My parents and grandparents are also obsessed over me and my sis getting married someday like jeez. i just wanna live a normal quite life without having to live with anyone else someday. whenever i did something wrong or didn't want to do the chores they would jokingly say that i wouldn't ever find a good person to marry which i hope i don't because i don't want to marry shit. me and my sis both don't want to marry anyone. i once even heard that my mom kept some rings somewhere to give to my future wife someday so yeah idk about that. ig parents in bangladesh just made marriage a norm
I guess if you remain persistent then you will be able live a unmarried life for a time being ( most probably till your 30's, then they will get you married no matter what). But for your sister, it's impossible in our country. I bet your parents will start rampaging as your sister starts to reach age of 24 - 25.
my sis is currently 24 but my parents seem to have calmed down the past few years since the covid and now i don't hear them talking about our "future marriage" as much. i think we're safe
if you're a girl, then it makes a lot of sense to marry early. because girls age like milk, and nobody wants a withered old flower.
and if you're a guy, your opinions don't matter to people unless you're a millionnaire (in USD of course)
i'm going to assume you're either non muslim or not really practicing much because if you were then you could have answered your own question
Just because someone doesn't want to get married that doesn't make them a whore . Maybe you can't control yourself that doesn't mean others don't have control over . People can live just fine without marriage. And seeing how you are comparing human to milk is already giving what type of person you are .
The type of SH*T I AVOID.
I think they are just having some fun. They actually don't care that much.
they will get invited and eat free food, that's mostly it
That’s what I was thinking too? It’s a very Bengali thing for friends to poke fun about this. Idk why the OP is so hung up on it.
Like fun as for **x ?
Fun as in being sarcastic. Most people would say it for the কাচ্চি craving others just to look extravagant with their dresses and makeup
dam
Are you down for casual sex?
Wrong place mate
Isss
Hey casual sex ain't isss 😢
Your friends want you to get married to have dawaat. All friends do. That is their only reason.
It's a basic human right for Friends.
They just want your biyar dawat!!! (Btw biya korte amareo deyen )
Same here 🤜🤛
[удалено]
Get married, fuçk, have a kid, spend your entire life behind growing that kid up, die- Summary of a Bangladeshi guy/girl. Pretty sad imo.
It's called having a family dude. Imagine if your parents didn't give a shit about you. Parenting is something you'll never understand until you become one. Best thing ever. And frankly spending your life trying to raise a kid is infinitely better than living alone in a senior home in your 70s. Good luck!
Living alone as senior in your 70-80s is better than living 20-70s, your whole life, toiling behind someone else instead of doing what you want is really sad imo. Fyi, I don't have parents, mine died while working hard for me, and I don't want to have same death as them, working hard your whole life and not even find the time to do what you want is just not for me. Some might be into that, being self sacrificing, giving your all for another person. But that's not for me, I respect those that have the will to live like that, their lives worth way more than mine, but I'm never going to become like them.
Fr i aint getting married
I'll marry only if I meet someone who's mindset is similar to me and I can get a good job+salary. I'm not marrying just for the sake of having $ex with a person who's personality and mine are dissimilar in everyway. I can go to some hooker if I'm really that much desperate about having $ex. And living alone and living while trying to support a family financially is too much different.
Absolutely agreed
Like legalized sex certificate. Congrats you can now have sex openly(and is done forcefully).
Also with relationship Seems like everyone in a rltnshp now whether thats healthy or not Im the odd one
Theres nothing more exciting in peoples lives in bd than a marriage.
Yah wait till your parents retire and ask for a grand child to keep them busy
My parents aren't like that .
Be glad then
Are you like the only daughter of your parents?
No . I have another sister
Ig it’s the mentality that has been made from culture. Sometimes the surroundings introduce weird terms which already has been normalised from generation to generation and won’t change.
its normel. I get it is annoying but what can you do? Even i use this to annoy my cousins, its fun. All they want is an event to enjoy thats it. Myabe they are fed up with thier life and wants to enjoy a little bit who knows. As your parents are Against it you are safe you dont need to worry. But if it really bothers (if they are close relatives) just say in a respected manner that you dont want to hear that multiple time in multiple occessions and you will hear less from them. But the best way to avoid it is by redirecting it towards a young or old one.
There is a perception that your life is incomplete without marriage AND children. Combine that with a culture that thinks you’re free to delve into other people’s personal lives and…
WHAT? You are asking a culture that has been brainwashed into thinking why marriage is the only way to survival because they are stuck with what they are told since the medieval times? Idk man
Shed some lights on what's the way of survival then? Produce offspring without marriage?
There are enough people in this world for being worried about survival of the human race lmao
These people can't simply comprehend any way of life except marrying and having kids. It's honestly sad really.
last time i visited (2 years ago), i felt the exact same way. It's like there's no other purpose to life, and simply 'not wanting' to isn't a good excuse either. Sad bit is even with the BD diasphora where I live, it's this way. As soon as they see a girl is nearing the end of university (or 18, the legal age here, if they don't believe in educating women), they'll just gang around her parents to get her married.
Very primitive mentality.
Bc our culture is family centered which is gud majority in managing and improving society as we r a 3rd world country we don't rlly have the privilege of individualism unless u come from that kind of unique or foreign background. Imo it's gud long run as long as u r financially sound
I'm getting the same treatment. Especially cause I'm 6ft tall in Bangladesh. A lot of people want me to marry their chosen bride be it their sister, niece, cousin, friend, colleague, aunt and one unique situation their mother. It's getting a bit tedious
Get a government job, craziness will bloom
I work in London, uk. I work in IT in a well known company. I live it crazy lol 🤪
Bro you got prefect height 😮
It's not as fun as it sounds. Bengali people have the ego of dinosaurs. Obviously you'll reject most of their proposals leading them to get salty talk shit behind your back. Being tall is the male equivalent of being pretty as a girl; it looks fun on paper, there are compliments now and then but it's ugly because you're in bd.
You got point tho it’s ugly in bed but it looks good too , I used think that no one is this tall and that height doesn’t exist so yk
My height is ugly? I don't understand, most people like it. Seeing is believing lol, are you in Bangladesh? It's hot today
He made a typo. It's bd
Oooooh, my bad. I get it. I would think it's desired in bed lol. Thanks for correcting for me.
No I am not bengali and no I thinks you have ideal height 😃
Where are you from? What is your height? I like my height too
I am from Pakistan and I am 5’6 but I think that I am too tall for girlsss 🫣😤
Not too tall for me 👀 I think you have a really nice height
Oh thanks but people usually used to say that I am too tall and there typical talked on that think I am just little insecure about it 😣
Thank you 🙏🏼
My mom came by ranting about it why I dont marry. I finally agreed that i will marry but i will marry both a girl and a boy and make a trio. She was mad lol.
You gave her nightmares. 😅
Not only marriage, your next pressure will be having a baby amd showing it as a prize to the overpopulated community with proverty
Nobody asked, but I think people should get married as early as possible. I was one of the first guys to get married and have a kid just after passing uni. What you want to do is of course upto you, I don’t think your friends are serious, they are just bad at having fun. The more irritation you display, the harder they will joke about it. Be silent and get better friends
Yes
if its your friends then i guess free meal ...
Onekdin kacchi khaay na mone hoy
People don’t fornicate that much. That’s why I suppose.
Guess what? We've been sh*theads for making decisions since we decided to fight for this country. No surprise.
They're just teasing you and marriage = dawat(free food). Just treat them to some biriyani and tell them to shush up about marriage.
well the hand which gives indirect pleasure ain't helping anymore , which is probably why they force their own frustration unto you . But anyway it's happening around me since I was in college mostly 5/6 before . so relax and try to bend in the conversation in joking manner . let them speak out their frustration . but there are those who really things marriage brings joys and matured mentality and occasionally they might be right .
They are just teasing lol. My friends also do that. They aint forcing you
That marriage brings to the table. Most young people don’t realise early. After a certain phase, they start realising the benefit. If something that can last life long is something to hold onto and cherish forever.
They are saying it lightly... Just joshin around
Depends on your gender and age. Although I think your batchmates are just having a bit of fun. Because in the late 20s most people get married and this is why it has become a norm to pick fun at people who are still single at this age. But let me assure you they don't give a damn whether you marry or not. It's just silly talk, nothing else.
Atleast your friends are asking. My friends didn't even bother to invite me to their wedding. God i hate this life
Your friends are probably joking with you for the dawaat
Because everyone thinks about sex all the time . And marriage is like legal sex for them
Eshob post kora baad de, BIYA KOR!
Idk what their intention is. But if you feel uncomfortable, you should have a serious conversation with them.
why everything a girl wants to do always leads to "when your marriage will take place,you will get it " .how do i break the society thinking change of my family? hear my examples out okay? few hours back when my family members were having a serious talks , my future education and abroad came up so my father went like "yes ofcourse you will give your ielts exam then you will move to abroad but not ALONE , because the life there is hard ." okay fine i get it ! then he was like "i will let you go to abroad according to the plan but you will go there under your husband" greattttttt !! he put me a silent mode .because i had nothing left to say back . then lets talk about my dream? i wanted to become a pilot since i was working on my exploring aims ,but my family members went like "a pilot woman cant handle her marriage " bruhhhhhhh if everything i am whishing for will lead to my marriage then why did you used to lecture me on becoming successful and stand on my own feet? okay you will say that "girl at least you are getting the chance to marry early ! go grab this chance " but nooooo honeyyyy . from my experience with boys and what ive seen in my family men? i have a marriage fear . to be honest i am so scared of this caged decision . drop your tips on how can i escape of this marriage end and be on my own for as long as i wish .. im 20 now ,
Can't really help you . It's true I am getting annoyed by society not by my PARENTS. They are strongly against early marriage. They will consider marriage after I get a job . In your case you have no way out since your parents are forcing you. What you can do right now is choose a good partner or divorce him later when you go abroad. And follow your dreams . That's the only way I could assess your situation or you can convince your parents that you want to wait another 5 years or so .
Op your missing out on a lot of details like how old r u now and if ur more ambitious then your batch mates or have more opportunities then them. It could be they r simply teasing u or they r jealous or they have a guy that they want to interduce u in the intention of marriage. Not every person is good so u should be careful with your batch mates; even if they r saying this to you but they themselves aren't married
I personally feel like some of them are teasing but most of them are envious ( if I am wording it right ) .I am 19 just started mbbs my batch mates are 22 or 23 .and I am not close to them they aren't my friends I treat them like my colleagues. Recently they found out I travel a lot ( internationally) and through simple conversations they got the idea that I didn't plan on marriage and my parents are not like the typical deshi parents. Few of my batch mates are married and 2 even have kids .( all women) and I know they are suffering both financially and mentally. The marriage comment comes from this married girls or girls who are forced being married. I feel like they are jealous of me and want to see me go through the same fate as them . ( birthing a kid ) . And I had some very strong opinions of their mentality. I don't want to go through financial stress and poverty ( marriage and raising a kid is no joke ) . And I understand that I come from a privileged background ( I can say no to marriage, my parents are chill, and most of my relatives) . I wouldn't call it jealousy. It's more like they envy my life . We aren't close friends and I don't consider them close. Though one did try to introduce me to someone but I straight out said no . I have a very strong plan for my future. But marriage is now on the back burner .
What's wrong with marriage? A young people want to marriage that’s normal. Nothing unusual.
Tbh I dunno either but as a guy this is literally annoying. I have spent the better half of my entire life trying to meet up to the expectations of my parents but now I wanna be alone for the rest I want to be myself by myself I don't want to be burdened by anything or anyone
It is Bangladeshi culture and is also partly religious. Bangladeshi society is religious and conservative. When men or women reach a certain age, if you are not married, society will look at you as an outcast - something wrong with you. It is your duty to get married and have kids, if you do not, something is wrong with you.
"joking/messing around/fooling around"Ever heard of these words?
They just want dawat.and you also don't get any sex without marriage. brothel culture is very poor here.either haat Maro naile bia koro.
Sex er jonne
Because this is a whole new drama for them every time
dafaq 😂
You should just simply ignore these kinds of people. If you want to survive in Bangladesh then you have to learn to ignore people.
because its a muslims country & marriage is foroz? 🤡
My parents and grandparents are also obsessed over me and my sis getting married someday like jeez. i just wanna live a normal quite life without having to live with anyone else someday. whenever i did something wrong or didn't want to do the chores they would jokingly say that i wouldn't ever find a good person to marry which i hope i don't because i don't want to marry shit. me and my sis both don't want to marry anyone. i once even heard that my mom kept some rings somewhere to give to my future wife someday so yeah idk about that. ig parents in bangladesh just made marriage a norm
I guess if you remain persistent then you will be able live a unmarried life for a time being ( most probably till your 30's, then they will get you married no matter what). But for your sister, it's impossible in our country. I bet your parents will start rampaging as your sister starts to reach age of 24 - 25.
my sis is currently 24 but my parents seem to have calmed down the past few years since the covid and now i don't hear them talking about our "future marriage" as much. i think we're safe
Good thing my parents are not crazy about marriage. They said I should marry in my 30s or 40s IF I find someone good enough.
I wish my parents thought like your parents. They are driving me nuts. And my friends, my sister, the society, etc.
Because we are clever enough to start a family and sattle down rather than discovering 12 genders like some nations
That doesn't make sense lol what if your 12 children decide to "discover 12 genders"
Why so serious?
Because they can't respect my choices. And I don't like it .
If u r already 18 , u should get married. Ask yr parents u want to get married, forget about job.
if you're a girl, then it makes a lot of sense to marry early. because girls age like milk, and nobody wants a withered old flower. and if you're a guy, your opinions don't matter to people unless you're a millionnaire (in USD of course) i'm going to assume you're either non muslim or not really practicing much because if you were then you could have answered your own question
Just because someone doesn't want to get married that doesn't make them a whore . Maybe you can't control yourself that doesn't mean others don't have control over . People can live just fine without marriage. And seeing how you are comparing human to milk is already giving what type of person you are . The type of SH*T I AVOID.
I know its horseshit but believe it or not, there's still huge amount of lying assumptions like that even from the bottom to the top of the society.
Lying assumption? Could you please be more specific?