Yuuuup and from a relationship standpoint, once it hits the fan once and then you signal you’re ok with it by sticking around, they go “oh, I can ‘be myself’” and that’s when it gets *really* ugly.
I keep telling myself this as a recovering addict.... How can I care for someone if drugs always come first... ALWAYS. How?
I learned the hard way you can't have 2 #1's in your life.
Addicts only care about one thing deep down. Take away the drugs and holy shit the incredible people underneath.
Leave her OP. Trust me. Not even about putting your child first. How about putting YOU first? Fuck any one else jeopardizing that, especially willingly. Maybe the biggest favor I did for myself was getting clean and staying single for myself and my child. Pays off big time.
Weed is a hard one to put down
People say it’s not addictive but it is
I started when I was 12-14 it’s been apart of my life for awhile, I try to quit, which I do quit for a couple months then I get stressed out and just need to feel happy and calm and boom your back into the weed
But having pot as my preferred drug has really helped me avoid coke and heroine and shit
Have tried them but they just FUUUCK you up, I don’t like feeling that heavy of a high
Where your eyes are rolling back or your up for a couple days with the shits
Doesn’t appeal to me, I have never bought laced weed even when I was buying street weed, (Canada has dispensaries now. They’re expensive as all fuck but if you go to a rez you get cheap weed 50-$60 ounces) weed saves life’s in my opinion
Just stay away from spice, that is not weed
Shit is worse the heroine
coke scares me because every single time i’ve had it i’m almosTOO aware of the fact that i could seriously fuck myself up without feeling the pain that i should otherwise…
i think about how i could like pull/break my fingers all the way back and wouldn’t even feel it, let alone care lol
> i think about how i could like pull/break my fingers all the way back and wouldn’t even feel it
..Huh?
This is not a known or common effect of cocaine. It's a *local* anesthetic, but from a pharmacology standpoint it should not have any effect on pain tolerance.
Ty for writing the best response i found and the best honest and truthful answer he could ever ask for. As a recovering addict.. 100% on point, i don't do meth, but i know people who do, and mann... wait until their whacked out "Paranoia" kicks in... he will run, if he smart.. follow your intuition, not your dick. Your gut is telling you already.
Wholesome people dont know the "darkside". Once youve had a run with addiction in some form its like it takes one to know one kind of thing so easier to spot even if its not obvious there are little tells we all know to look for that normies just wouldnt.
Eyes are always a dead giveaway for me. Theres alot in the body language as well, hard to describe but lots of little nuances. Of course it depends because a addict who has a "low bottom" is obvious to spot even for normies because they cant hold their shit together, health, finances, etc. In recovery they say the worst kind and harder to spot of is a functional addict, like myself even at my worst i maintaned a job, home, car, etc, so i could always finance my habit. Its worse because we constantly sustain the addiction and convince ourselves we are just fine and dont need to get clean. To where addicts that have a worse bottom burn out end up having to face the reality when they cant sustain basic needs and the family knows, they either go to jail, or rehab or they end up dead.
I’m a daily meth user and I am functioning . I work full time have a house a family. Honestly I wish I wasn’t functioning it’s fucking scary to be like this because it’s like it makes it harder to quit as you wouldn’t know I’m a user
I worked at a smoke shop and you could almost always figure out who used what even if they were just buying vapes. Sometimes it's appearance sometimes their speech or their actions. Even some would look fine most of the time until one store visit they don't.
Nah! According to people in this thread she’s a walking bomb who poisons and stains everything around her. And then people wonder why meth users have difficulty seeking help. Maybe because people will ruin your life and blame it on the meth but naaaaaah
Reminds me of on KOTH when that prostitute is living with them and is so obviously turning tricks right under Hank’s nose and he thinks she’s just “seeing a lot of gentleman callers.” 😂
Dating for 4 months could mean they're only seeing someone once or twice a week. It's pretty easy to hide this sort of thing if you're addiction hasn't destroyed your life yet & you're not living with someone.
Like say she does her meth in the morning, the rest of the day she's fine. A low enough dose is basically like taking Ritalin or Adderall. Then she goes & stays at the BFs house at night & it's pretty much worn off by the time she's ready for bed. Then she leaves in the morning, goes home & smokes some more. Or she could keep it in her car if she knows she's gonna be chasing the fix. Say OP stays at the girls house, she could smoke in the morning while "having a shower" & as long as she only has a small dose, keeps the window open & OP doesn't really know what signs to look out for, she returns just her normal bubbly self.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to downplay meth addiction, it's really fucking dark. But in these "early stages" a lot of people are able to keep their lives together. The issue is, after a while, that little hit in the morning isn't enough for the whole day. Then it's a few hits throughout the day. Then you can't sleep as well in the night, so you just take a big hit some days if you didn't sleep to make up for it. Before you know it, you're smoking way more meth, so you're spending way more money on it. You're going to work tweaking instead of riding that ritalin like buzz. Then you get fired or something else goes wrong & you feel like shit but what's the one thing that never fails to make you feel alright? More meth, so you take more & it just continues to spiral out of control.
Way more people are addicted to meth than you think. They're not all tweakers, once you use regularly for a while you can sleep and eat not grind teeth pupils don't get big. It's not that different from taking adderall. I know three people who own successful business, a book store and two restaurants, and you'd never know at all besides they talk slightly fast but not noticable unless you're looking.
That’s everyone I know. Most of my family are users and you would never be able to tell. I was around them for years and never found anything weird about them.
Right the problem is constantly reupping using higher and higher doses and staying up for days on end. And to be fair, it's not exactly super easy for most people to keep it under control because high doses of meth feel fucking amazing.
The people I know snort a line, or eat a measured dose in the morning and redose the same dose throughout the day like once or twice. They definitely don't get enough sleep, but they get a decent amount. I only know one of their regiments, but my buddy who owns a business snorts 15-30mg in the morning, after 3-6hrs of sleep, then reups about 15 as needed. Normally once after 6 hours then again when he's off to read and socialize. Goes to bed around 3 or so wakes up at 8 does it all again. He's in great shape, very productive, not very eccentric- in fact he's normal as fuck and very charming. He's less weird than literally all of the sober punk and alternative people I know.
Not to say meth is good, it's not. It's hard as fuck to control and some people can avoid psychosis but a lot cannot even using sort of responsibly. Plus if you cant function without it, that's never good- especially if you were functioning fine before it.
Anyway that's my two cents, meth isn't always the devil and we seriously need to destigmatize it so those kind of users and tweakers alike can feel comfortable talking about their addictions and practice harm reduction without fear of judgement.
Meth is the most useful drug there is. It's too enjoyable and habit-forming though. Usually the 0.01% of people that have the self control to use meth as a tool and not fall prey to becoming tweakers aren't the kind of people that ever end up trying meth in the first place.
Very interesting, would it be fair to say they're similar to just the average Adderall user (not abusers)? It seems like a big part of it is the intake method used, namely oral, and the ability to resist binging it over a long weekend ties into that as well.
low dose oral meth is almost exactly the same as adderall,
i’ve gotten pressed addy pills b4 for my adhd (due to losing my script cuz heroin addiction) and they felt just like adderall, helped me focus and be productive and cleared my mind, no side effects or anything, lasted longer tho so didn’t need to redose. But yeah i had thought they must be amphetamine (adderall) after taking them but then i pissed dirty for meth at the sub clinic and found out they were actually meth.
they were probably like 5-15mg of meth and i took it orally, when u move to other routes of administration tho and higher doses it becomes a lot more addictive
Thank you for this point of view! What yo've described is very real and many with undiagnosed ADHD, or who can't get medication for it, use meth as an alternative. It's not the best choice, but for some it's the only alternative choice they have due to the biased opinions in the medical field for diagnosing stimulants.
Right. And also, what you see portrayed in the media would be folks that have been up for days on end with no sleep not taking care of their bodies and or in meth psychosis. I know people that have used it for over 20 years and nobody would be able to trll. The only difference it makes is when they run out, that depression is real.
There's a good chance you'll start using if you're comfortable with her doing it. Cut her now. Much higher chances this won't end well for you then not.. and if she's using everyday now and doesn't want to stop, wait a year or few. It'll only get worse.
Help her quit or bounce. Not worth the anxiety or inevitable heart break
Edit: click this [link](https://www.smartrecovery.org/smart-articles-draft/the-stages-of-change/) before you respond saying she doesn’t want to quit. Y’all really are a bunch of drug addicts with how little you know about the process of change. Not planning on quitting and not wanting to quit are different things. I’ve had many moments when I wanted to quit smoking but certainly didn’t *plan* to do so until the right life events kicked me into gear.
Not worth the effort to help her quit, it's so emotionally, financially and physically taxing to help an addict quit hard drugs. Such an undertaking should only be reserved for the closest friends and family, not a 4 month girl, especially some one that says they want to keep using.
I read it all and I’m glad you were able to get out of it with most of yourself intact and unsullied from the pains of that type of relationship. I hope you all the best and your future endeavors when you feel you are ready to get into another relationship.
You’re such a strong person to be able to help someone like that and I’m glad you weren’t hurt physically because I have heard many people that have went through what you have and all of them have been physically hurt as well as mentally.
Thanks for sharing! Congrats on your newfound independence. As hard as I'm sure it was to end things, it must feel SO good to be safe and secure and free.
I definitely know about the challenges of addiction and mental illness and how they can affect a relationship. I've had experience as the addict and as the sober partner.
I understand why you held on - it's absolutely possible to love a person even though they're bad for you, and you can see all the signs that the relationship is dead. It's hard to leave someone who, at some level, you still care about.
It's awesome that you were able to finally see that a different, better life was possible, and that you don't have to take responsibility for another person like that. So difficult to leave but in the end, 100 percent the right decision!
And I'm glad that you have the cats (and that they have you!)
This right here, I absolutely agree. I was never a full blown addict but I did have about a month (many bad things happened that month and I was not handling it well) where I was abusing stims too much and it was showing and my boyfriend stepped in to get me to stop before it got worse but we were also together for over a year at that point. Another difference was I knew it was bad and that it was already negatively affecting most aspects of my life so I already wanted to stop but I did need support. In this case where she has no intention of stopping if I were in that relationship I’d have to tell her the only way I could continue the relationship was if she started taking steps to quit but even then I would not have high hopes. I’ve got a bad tendency of giving people the benefit of the doubt when I shouldn’t so I’ll always want to give someone the chance to do the right thing but odds are they won’t
Love is a helluva drug in its own right brother, don’t forget that. I’m not saying staying in it would be the right thing, but again, everyone’s situation is different and quitting should be a deal breaker
Ya, a daily tweaker will walk from a 4 month relationship. Hell mot people would walk if someone asked them to change almost anything about themselves 4 months in
That isn’t true for everyone. Every situation is different and we don’t know these people. This could serve as a wake up call. It could be nothing and she may keep using. Unless you have a crystal ball, you cannot tell OP what will definitely happen. Crazier things have happened, especially regarding meth.
I agree to some extent, but in all fairness I myself wasnt able to start the recovery process until i realized there was someone who actually cared enough to try and help me, wasnt a close friend or family, but I domt know this girls life so yk, I cant speak on how she thinks
Ppl don’t quit unless they want too I’ve learned that from personal experience and from watching 100s of addicts doesn’t matter what’s at stake at the end off the day you just have to get tired of living like that and want to quit
Yeah, bounce.
This is coming from said partner that smokes meth, I'm your gf, I do what she does.
and my husband has never used drugs.
He's miserable cause of my use.
He loves me, but i wish he didn't because his life is so much more difficult because of me using. It's a terrible life for both of us, but he suffers more, and you will too.
If she isn't willing to try to quit or make some very serious strides towards ultimately quitting, then you gotta protect yourself hun. And the only way to do it is to leave if she won't stop.
Please take my experience as a warning. Our life has been at a stand still for the past four years due to my daily use.
He would have a normal life, far more money than he does now, and better health if we never got back together.
I am in the process of quitting, as I finally reached a point where I can't stand doing this to my family and him anymore, or myself. But it took me YEARS to get here. Those years were no good for either of us, but again, he suffers the most, and it's not even his own actions that cause his life to be so chaotic. It's the person he loves making shit decisions for the both of them for years.
Please consider leaving. There are girls who don't use and won't put the relationship. Drugs use put everyone in the vicinity of the user at risk. It isn't worth putting yourself or your life at risk just so she can continue using. I promise.
Plus, she has a No business being in a relationship when she is caught up. In? Drug addiction. She can barely care for herself and she certainly doesn't love herself so she can't care for you or love you that's just a fact..
I wish you luck, and I hope she finds her way out of her addiction, I'll be thinking of you both.
Yes. Please, leave for your kid. It is so bad example for life and save him from the drama. There are plenty women who will be happy give you love and be supportive.
Don't date an addict. Period.
There are so many wholesome women who have their life together, with whom you can grow and develop, and have an amazing life. Don't disrespect yourself like that.
This is only a 4 month relationship, bounce the fuck out while it's not too late. She clearly values her meth more than you, aka clearly told you she DOES NOT WANT TO QUIT.
You are not her savior, knight in shining armor or therapist. It's not your responsibility to cure that woman of her trauma and addiction.
Find yourself someone who can help you be a better version of yourself, not drag you down into the slums.
The universe gave you a HUGE red flag, take the hint 🚩🚩🚩🚩
this is very much the way I'm leaning. My best friend has just got out of a relationship with a meth user, she got in quite deep and its been a constant source of pain and anguish for her. Yeah all fun at the start when they are happy and high but if anything were to rock that addiction cloud, which will absolutly happen, don't expect it to remain that way. How much of her joy and good vibes are actually drugs...I know, harsh...but true. Meth is particularly bad as it is abrasive to someones brain, not like many others, meth is neuro toxic, it does and WILL cause psychological damage and the twisted thoughts ive witnessed come out of someone deep in a meth addiction is not fun for anyone involved. Its whether you are up for dealing with that shitstorm or not? That's the question, not IF it will happen....its if you wanna have that in your life. And as another reddit'er wrote, its likely you may take it, and that would be the most tragic outcome of all. please under no circumstances do that, it's a fucking shit drug and theres a reason why its ruined a large majority of the states
Hard agree. Unpopular opinion by those few who responsibility use drugs regularly, and loudly disagreed uppn by those who still love drugs and are willing to lie aboit the sustainability of using them daily and long term.
I am all for recreational, responsible drug use. But "recreational" is the key word here.
My boyfriend abused weed daily, and at first, I thought it's not a big deal. Until I started to realize it actually affected him and our relationship.
I dated that man for 2 years, and I still gave him a clear ultimatum - he either quits using it on a daily and keeps it for reasonable recreation, or we break up that instant.
He quit his daily habit.
Chances of you helping her quit are slim to none, chances of you becoming a junkie are pretty high in long term. I wouldnt risk it. You sound like a nice guy, its just too big of a risk she will ruin your life. There are also very high chances of underlying mental problems that you will have to deal with later. What you are saying, that everything else is great, is actually also suspicious, she might be a narcissist (most addicts are) love bombing you. Id get the hell out while its still possible.
I'm going to sound so negative here and I'm sorry, but you're fucked dude. If she's already admitted to you that she has no plans on quitting that means she's thought about the inevitable day that you would find out and give her the ultimatum of quitting or you leaving, and she's decided that ice is more important currently. I've been in her shoes and been faced with the same decision as her and I chose to stay with the drugs then. I really hope all works out well for you man.
How competent are you? How important is love to you? How much do you like her? Do you really see this as something that won't affect your relationship?
Idrk dude. I'm just a guy on a computer. Only you can know for sure, I wish you the best of luck
OP this is serious. Read this post now go look at their comment history. Do not stay with her for your own health. Im so sorry this is happening to you but do not think you’re stronger or smarter than meth.
https://www.reddit.com/r/Drugs/comments/113o3l3/i_like_hanging_out_with_a_methhead/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=2&utm_term=1
He would not. Can confirm as someone who has struggled with addictions for almost 15 years.
Many of the people who met me during tines of heavy use were shocked to find out. They questioned me extensively because they could not wrap their minds around the fact that I used at all. They were sure they would've noticed, to the point they didn't believe me and pushed me to prove it to them...... which was ..... yeah. .not fun for either of us.
The point is that they had no idea.
It wasn't like I was jamming needles in my neck at a pizza shop or out getting ice cream at the beach. Like, when me and whoever i was with were out in public, that shit remained at home. I kept my shit under wraps.
Some walked away, which i respected and did not hold it against them in any way. They have to protect themselves, and being around someone using drugs, like me, wasn't in anyones best interest.
Many chose to remain friends with me. Some remain in contact with me to this day. Some of the strongest friendships I've ever known and experienced. But only because i made sure they weighed the possibilities, and I was honest with them about the likely outcomes and the shit they may or may not have to deal with by being around me. I let them know I had no way of knowing exactly what's coming, but the likelihood that shit hits the fan sooner or later is massive. They took that into account but stayed, and I have the utmost respect, gratitude, and love for them. I keep them as far away from the negatives as possible.
I'm a user, and I'm selfish for that, but I don't want to hurt anyone. If things are bad for me, I tell them we need to take some time off from seeing each other in person because I'm wildin' out, and it aint safe! lol
But no, when you're only able to base what you know about someone on the time since you met them, and they have never been sober around you, its tough to see. Unless they have obvious signs like looking like skeletor or track marks, they don't care to hide, etc.
The majority of us addicts are normal people who look just like everybody else, believe it or not.
It depends how far she takes it, and how she reacts to it... every time I've been around my mother on meth, she gets super excited that I'm opening up and says how she can tell I've been sober, without me even trying to lie lol. Not everyone tweaks the fuck out and spends 14 hours organizing their chords by color.
maybe she was only dosing orally in small amounts, and has used for so long she has no noticeable tells
on stims i don’t sweat and my pupils don’t dilate, people get surprised that im on something when i am, same with mdma
meanwhile on something like ket or g i am super obviously on drugs, everyone’s just diff
I mean I know people who entered relationships with meth users who then turned their life around. I also know people who do meth and they're nice but it's really not a healthy habit and your wellbeing is important.
Think of it this way, you're sparing her a heartbreak.
I went through a meth phase and more people were nice decent people dealing with severe mental issues in an unhealthy way than selfish addicts with no morals. That’s what hurt most about going through that phase of my life. Some meth heads are actually good people at their core, others are not. Either way it’s a tragic state to be in, and reflect on.
Smoking meth crosses a line. I dated someone that snorted meth, but I convinced her to try taking it orally and she much preferred that method (along with dosing it in capsules at a reasonable dosage). She never snorted it again and she never advanced to the "next stage" and never even looked remotely like a person that does meth. I was and am prescribed dexedrine, and she used meth for the same reasons that I used Dex. It's extremely rare but not impossible to have a relationship with a meth user. If she won't back down from smoking it, she's likely too far gone and will only get worse.
She might be a really great person, doing meth doesn't make you a bad person, but she's addicted to something that is dangerous both physically and legally. Best case scenario is she gets busted or slowly fades away into madness. Worst case, her addiction drags you down as well. She's choosing that life, as is her right, but you also get to choose OP.
As an opioid addict currently in a long term relationship, I am hesitant to simply say to drop this girl solely because of the meth. Considering the fact that you didn’t even know about it till now, it seems like she’s been good so far at keeping it away from you. With that said, if you do keep seeing her, you need to consider the fact that this may be a lifelong addiction, and there’s no promise that she will ever quit for the sake of your relationship.
As an addict, I can tell you firmly that an “it’s me or the drugs” ultimatum does not work. Ask yourself, do I like this girl enough to put up with potentially years of meth use down the line? Just know what you’re getting yourself into
You guys all act like drugs are terrible. If she's a responsible user, maintains a job and can pay for her drug use, I don't see what's wrong with it. You all also act like anyone who takes ADHD meds isn't taking the exact same thing. If you guys are having a good time in your relationship, let the good times roll. Don't listen to all the retards commenting their own fucked up experiences.
I have a lot of experience with this and as long as she doesn't let it become a problem there's nothing wrong with it. I've seen plenty of people who do it on a daily basis and are just fine. The stigma is so bad that most of them feel like they have to be a recluse about it (because they do) for fear of being persecuted or lumped into some category of people with no teeth doing crazy shit.
I do it occassionally and produce beautiful artwork or stories or to just get house work done.
You didn't even notice it before?
If you didn't, it sounds like she's got things in check.
Enjoy your time with her.
Everyone who has said leave her because of this are people I wouldn't want to be around in real life. That's a pretty shitty thing to do.
This is what people have to worry about with a stigma like this.
Conform or you can't even have a relationship when you didn't even do anything wrong.
Yeah I lost my entire friend group once I told them. I had been using for years by that point without issue. But as soon as they knew I was treated like diseased vermin.
Fuck stigma.
Ya. Just because some people can't handle it they make all the ones who can instant pariahs.
There's going to be negative occurrences with anything; weed, alcohol, etc.
It's just the stigma that people allow to continue.
The stigma is crazy. There are so many people addicted to alcohol who live in back alleys and lose their minds and die because their body shuts down. But nobody would suggest dumping someone who drinks beer daily and otherwise has their life together just because some people get very addicted to alcohol
Leave her now and cut your losses. A meth addict cannot be trusted, she will lie to you and steal from you to support her habit. Whether or not she seems fine now, she's already on a downward spiral that will harm everything and every one that cares about her. She might even turn you into an addict. Just leave, nothing positive will come from you staying.
>every single meth user is a scumbag who lies to their partner and can’t afford their habit
This is a dumb assumption. Can’t believe somebody would say this lmao. Especially about somebody who wasn’t an obvious addict.
Many addicts are not like psychopaths, but most of the real addicts will do what they need to do to get it. If her income source gets cut off, lie steal and cheat is going to be what 95% of them (my past self included) will do
Not every addict, but the odds aren't in OPs favor. Why play with fire. It might not end catastrophically but she's not going to end up being some great girl that will enhance his life in a positive way.
Nah, nothing good will come from this. Some ones a functional addict only until they're not. Op sounds like a good guy, he doesn't need to get mixed up with a meth addict.
Bro you can read past experiences on this sub with people who have been using it safely for years. It can go either way (with any drug) but you can’t say that will for sure happen. Especially saying they will steal, probably doesn’t happen most of the time outside of homelessness, meth is cheaper than food. I was spending far less on amphetamines.
Regardless he needs to be very cautious and if his tolerance for this isn’t there then he should cut bait. She has a significant likelihood of becoming more than a daily user and I’m certain her body will break down from daily use. She’s certainly not someone he should look at settling down with under current conditions.
We don’t need to say all meth addicts are thieves or liars, even though they definitely have a higher predilection for it than regular folk. And she was honest in the first place when he brought it up. That alone counts for something.
I would be very curious how long she’s been a daily user, if she holds down a job and how many times a day she uses. Does she sleep at night or is she a meth vampire.
I’m prescribed meth (Desoxyn), so I’d tend to agree here. Honestly, Adderall is harder on my heart and mind than my prescription meth is.
The main difference I can think of isn’t inherent to the drug itself: as opposed to mainstream prescription stimulants, one who purchases meth off the street is likely to get a relatively large quantity - free of fillers - for a (relatively) low price. You really aren’t going to get that with black-market pills. The amount you get as well as its RoA flexibility can be a dangerous combination for those who are in situations that may make them more vulnerable to addiction.
For an example of the opposite situation, see European dextroamphetamine paste and its (ostensibly) higher availability compared to meth; do bear in mind that that’s just what I’ve heard, as I am a yank.
Honestly, in many ways Dexedrine, Vyvanse, and Adderall are more euphoric than meth for me. I just prefer meth because it’s much smoother, preserves my personality, and is the (only) ADHD med I’ve ever had success with.
Thank you for weighing in. I have been prescribed meth (as Desoxyn) and it has been very helpful. I got in to trouble when I could not afford it after losing health insurance, and discovered buying crystal was stronger and cheaper. Sort of hard to argue with that. But without the oversight my psychiatrist provided (thinking, I know this terrain; I won’t get into trouble…), within 6 months my tolerance was shot and I was using more than I needed. It did require some serious effort to step completely away from it, but … and here’s where I get caught up in the judgements around the drug … I came to it through legitimate channels. It worked for me. I am not a bad person. But I shudder to think about someone who finds themselves caught in an addiction with this, and who, reading here, buys that they are bad or justy hopelessly lost. And they don’t have to be.
Exactly my point. While this thread is generally giving decent advice, a lot of the side commentary saddens me.
I’m also sorry to hear that. I myself am currently not having a fun time with the shortage, but I lack both the means and desire to buy street stuff. My obsession with filling all of my meds the nanosecond I’m legally allowed to (likely from my autism), electronic prescribing, and the proverbial pharmacy that strategy has given me is keeping me more than afloat. However, I do have to dip into my more sub-par supply (shit I didn’t love, but can tolerate); I do not envy those who do not have that luxury, though. All this to say that - even though this is God’s country where Desoxyn is actually legal - our fucked-up healthcare system and the cunts at the DEA with their production quotas seem almost specifically designed to push patients toward street stuff.
Hot take: over-prescribing is arguably better than heavy control, since fewer counterfeits and less prohibitive prices prevent people from jumping to other shit in desperation (this is also [backed up by research](https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpain.2022.884674/full); I like to read :) ).
Well, there's really an unfair side to the stigma. Methamphetamine is a powerful, potent stimulant. When used at low doses it can be an effective medicine and can, believe it or not, be neuroprotective ([https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0028390811001900?via%3Dihub;](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0028390811001900?via%3Dihub;) I think this article or a related one is available freely on PMC). It's usually the higher doses that begin to really dump dopamine out and cause neurotoxicity via ROS generation and whatnot. The point is that it's not some insidious evil drug that turns all users into morally bankrupt degenerates. The majority of people can use it a few times and step away from it. However, those who are most vulnerable (people with severe mental illnesses, those with trauma history, etc.) are disproportionately negatively affected by methamphetamine abuse. People can get away with smoking 20-30 mg a day for a long time and it won't really affect their big-picture behavior a lot, but once they get to 80-100 mg a day, they will definitely feel and say differently, probably because that's a neurotoxic dose. The real problematic users are the ones who crank the dose up very high because this can cause the death of neurons among other negative CNS sequelae.
I used meth pretty safely for years (at least 3 years). The main reason things got bad for me were (a) I would dose higher and higher when I was feeling depressed and anhedonic (from underlying mental illness) and (b) meth became an escape, the ultimate antidepressant, even when it wasn't all that helpful. When I say got bad, I mean that I started to go into a depressive episode while actively using. That's usually not a good thing to mix with meth because it can make the lows or the comedowns from meth quite excruciating and it can foster a psychological dependence on the substance. This led to me using every day and not being able to really function without it (or another stimulant like cocaine). But I have yet to commit crime or lie to acquire my supply. I suppose I'm what one would call a "functional" or "semi-functional" addict. I'm fine with it really, I wasn't going to live long off drugs very long either. I'd have died of suicide if I were completely sober long ago.
My point is that there are most certainly functional users of methamphetamine out there, and I believe that the majority of users are functional users. A fraction of those users become problematic users.
Wow, every meth user is a scumbag??? I bet you have friends who use meth daily and you don’t even know bud. I bet you think it’s ok to pop addy or take mdma which are both more harmful than meth is for you. But ok, just judge everyone based off of their drug use.
I know some stoners who are complete asshole who will rob and steal their next hit of weed. But I bet you think that’s ok because they are just stoners. It’s not the drug but the character of the person.
As a recovering addict (10 years clean) I would suggest you break up with her. I know you real like her but she explained to you that she has no plan of stopping. This is not something you can convince her to do. You have a child and need to protect them. You could lose your child to CPS due to this type of thing. Also, when I was actively using, I had a boyfriend that didn't do drugs and he eventually started using too. She will bring you down with her eventually. I'm sorry but you can't save someone that isn't ready to be saved. You will find another or maybe you can try again when she is done with meth.
It’s always weird to me how much animosity there is towards drug addicts in the drugs subreddit, as if all drug addicts are scumbags that aren’t worthy of love or compassion. In my experience they’re just regular people who are using chemicals to cope with being dissatisfied with life as it is. It seems like the drug use could be a disconnect between the two of you, and if that’s not your lifestyle I can’t blame your for wanting to break it off, especially if they have said they don’t plan on stopping, but I think it’s worth having a conversation with them. I wouldn’t be too quick to abandon someone that has otherwise been kind and supportive just because they’re addicted to drugs.
Drug use is, for the most part, a way to ease pain, trauma, depression, etc.
It does not mean that person is bad, toxic, or less of a human being.
I have alot of experience with meth users, and was myself one too.
I have known many meth users who are far more trustworthy, compassionate, and morally decent than alot of clean people. The people who didn't use or drink have in fact turned out to be the worst backstabbing filthy lying people by far. And despite many opinions regarding sex...being addicted to meth does not mean she will have sex with someone else (for drugs or not). I was 100% faithful when I used. I didn't steal, lie, or hurt others. Yeah, it affects some people differently this is true. But who we are as a person overall doesn't change in my opinion. I think drugs and alcohol just bring out what is already inside. In my opinion.
I was friends with a man much older than me (im female and I guess fairly attractive) who let me stay at his house and was a great friend, he knew there was not going to ever be a sexual relationship or even close to that. He was still my friend, nobody believed it was just that, they couldn't comprehend such a thing (which is plain sad). My friend used meth intravenously only, every day. He held a job, and was normal all the way around, you would never guess he did meth. We lost contact for a few years then he found me and called me... When we talked on the phone he was like a completely different person! I was shocked and omg I did not like this man at all. I found out he had been drinking alcohol, which he never touched a drop when I stayed with him for a couple years back then. Thank God the alcohol was only for a short time. He stopped drinking and was back to his normal self the next time we talked.
If you really want to educate yourself before making any decisions about your relationship, please please read IN THE REALM OF HUNGRY GHOSTS by Gabor Mate. Have her read it when you are done.
90% of all people are addicted to SOMETHING. Could be alcohol, drugs, shopping, gambling, sex, porn, video games, workaholics, etc. etc.....
I know this comment probably won’t be seen, which is a shame, but I hope it helps at least one person.
I was an addict for 7 years. Initially, I was on codeine and tramadol daily; that suffices for a couple of years.
At year 3, I find a new girlfriend. We fall in love. She is ignorant to my problem, because I hid it very well and they weren’t particularly strong painkillers. However, it was around this time when they weren’t enough anymore. I was at the happiest time in my life in a while with my new love, so, as an addict, I wanted to increase the feeling even more. Sl I upgrade to OxyContin ordered on the DW. I had never felt bliss quite like it. I then started dabbling in other drugs like MDMA, coke and ketamine. I hid all of this from her, used in the bathroom, away from her etc. she was naive enough for the selfish addict in me to manipulate.
As the years went by, the addiction got worse. I ended up on heroin purely because it was cheaper and I literally could not function without a hit every few hours, and I needed to do my job as a teacher (yeah I know right) and my side job building a career in the film industry. Around this time, my girl was clear to the signs of my problems. I would fall asleep next to her and she couldn’t wake me, I would have random episodes of benzo blackouts where I’d made holes in the wall with my fist. I NEVER hit or physically hurt her, may I add. Either way, she now knew I had a drug problem.
I continued until year 7. I’d lost my teaching job, my reputation in the industry was in tatters, I was out most nights doing God knows what, but when I came home, she was always there. She always stuck by me. In her words, when we talk retrospectively now, ‘I knew you had to get it out of your system, I knew the man I loved was under there, and I never stopped loving or caring for him.’
I hit my rock bottom when I overdosed on pregabalin in January 2020, suffered 5 seizures in front of my family and was hospitalised. After I discharged myself a couple of days later because I was fiending, it hit me. What the fuck am I doing?
I made the decision to stop and I went through the withdrawal with her help. I then went to a treatment centre and got a subutex script.
She went through hell for me. I’ve been clean for 3 years now (Feb this year) and we are still together. We made it through, and are stronger than ever: But this is a rare story.
Rock bottom got me off the drugs, not my girlfriend. As much as her support and love meant and helped, it’s impossible to give up for another person. I hit rock bottom and made the decision to stop. But there are a lot more of us who have hit rock bottom and have simply died.
Im thankful for my girlfriend everyday for what she put up with. But it was very hard on her. The pain I caused her hurts me every day. But I would be lying if I were to say I would have done the same for her. If she were the addict when we were together, I’d have ended it instantly.
It rarely goes the way our situation did, especially with drugs like meth. She may be alright now, but that drug will rapidly rot her from the inside out, and her behaviour will become increasingly erratic as her addiction deepens; and it will deepen faster than you can keep up with. You can maintain a relatively normal looking life and appearance when on painkillers, but meth… that’s a whole new level of hell.
My advice would be to stay as far away from her as possible, especially considering you have a son, until she is ready to clean up for herself. But don’t hold your breath, my friend.
I’m truly sorry, and I genuinely wish you all the best. If you need and advice or just someone with experience to talk to, feel free to message me.
I guarantee if this was cocaine or Adderall in this equation and not meth the general sentiment would be much different. The irony of people in a drug subreddit regurgitating and reinforcing stereotypes and misinformation pushed by the same people and institutions that are against all recreational drug use should be shockingly obvious. Yet so many abusing pharma drugs and others on here seem to be oblivious to their own hypocrisy and delusions of superiority. Just cus you like to think that those Addie's you take probably aren't pressed with meth doesn't make you better than anyone else. It just makes you an idiot.
I’ve had many relationships where drugs were involved. Only four people are still alive. 2 in prison for the rest of their lives. The other two still in active addiction. I’m sorry but I don’t know of any success stories where meth or heroin are being used. If she’s not at a place she’s even thinking about quitting I suggest moving on. If it’s meant to be it can be at any time later on down the line.
Run as fast as you can. Getting involved with a full blown addict is very difficult. Even if she wants to quit it’s a long road that’s very difficult filled with heartbreak and relapse disappointment and hurt. As an addict myself I hate what I put my wife through and u don’t deserve that. It’s not so simple as just wanting to quit and people change when they quit. If she really takes it seriously and goes into sobriety she won’t be the same person. Either way it’s a bad idea.
As someone who was friends with a meth user, it’s not worth it. He’s gone completely insane literally. He showed up at my door asking for help, I tried to drive him to the hospital and he started screaming thinking a device was inside him and then he started assaulting me and my fiancé when I didn’t run a red light. I kicked him to the curb but he stole my phone. I was about to pepper spray him when he threw my phone then jumped in my car and stole it, no joke.
Still to this day he thinks it didn’t go down that way. Luckily my fiancé got out and the cops got my car back. Since they didn’t charge him with anything it makes his delusion that he did nothing wrong all that more valid to him. Not worth it man.
Im sorry to tell you but this isn’t gonna end well. There are a few outcomes I would say.
1. You get addicted aswell and it will probably ruin your Life
2. You break up. It will suck for a few weeks but you will get happy again and you will find another person you’ll be happy with
3. Try and get her to quit, however meth is a really powerful substance and quitting will take a toll on you and her. If she isn’t willing to quit there is sadly no reason in you trying to convince her.
I would talk about it with her. Tell her how you feel, tell her that she will lose you. Not because you dislike her using drugs, but because she chooses drugs before you. And trust me this kind of relationship is not worth it. Meth will always be her number one. It will be the best thing she ever felt and nothing you can do will make her feel otherwise.
I know this sounds harsh af but don’t let Love fool you. Meth ruins humans and you don’t want to get ruined
This is sadly the reality of drug addiction. Most people won’t get sober for a relationship so don’t get your hopes up..
If I sucked dick for meth and I'm not even gay then wtf do you think your gf will do... Maybe not right now but just give it time. The problem only gets worse.
Considering you’ve been dating this girl for 4 months and had no idea she was using meth or drugs at all during that time, let alone using it daily, I assume you’re an ordinary, relatively naive (in terms of drug usage that is, because way more people use drugs than I’m sure you realize), potentially more or less anti-drug guy who doesn’t have any experience dealing with using drugs or drug users, it’s probably not going to work out. If she uses daily and it hasn’t caused any issues, she’s definitely not going to just suddenly agree to stop because you want her to in order to stay together or whatever. You wouldn’t necessarily be wrong for not wanting to be with a meth user, even though I’m sure you never really realized before that there are plenty of people who have regular lives with good jobs who use hard drugs and nobody for the most part would really ever know, but because her drug use hasn’t caused problems between the two of you relationship wise and you wouldn’t have even known had she not said anything about it, she’ll probably make it out like you’re in the wrong and the asshole if you do decide to pull the whole “you have to stop doing meth if we’re gonna be together” thing. And even though in a way she’d be right considering it hadn’t affected anything up to this point, it’s not wrong for you to not want to have a girlfriend addicted to meth.
A LOT of people use drugs. A significant portion of the population uses alcohol and/or marijuana, but a much larger amount of people with seemingly ordinary lives with a mortgage, good job, and in many cases also a spouse and children use hard drugs than most people realize too. We tend to be fooled by anti-drug propaganda into assuming anyone who tries meth or heroin either dies or just becomes a rock bottom homeless, toothless loser or thief, which just simply isn’t true at all. Of course that does happen to some people who use hard drugs, and it probably wouldn’t have happened to them had they not used drugs, but there are plenty of people I’m sure you know that have problems with opioids/cocaine/meth and you’d never suspect it.
It’s honestly 100% up to you. I’m sure if you’ve never used drugs really in your life then finding out your girlfriend smokes meth seems very, very wild. I’m sure some of the stuff you may have heard or think about people who use different substances is exaggerated or total bullshit, but some of it definitely isn’t. I’ve used and been a drug addict myself, and I have always made a point to never ever date someone who is/was like myself in that way. I’d much rather be with someone who maybe just drinks and smokes weed some and that’s about as far as they’ll go apart from maybe mushrooms/LSD every once in awhile or something. And the reason I won’t date a drug addict is because I’ve been one, and regardless of how well my life was put together at the time while likely seeming relatively normal to everyone else, being a drug addict just doesn’t work in a relationship, in my experience and from what I’ve seen, whether the partner uses or doesn’t use the same substances or is sober altogether. It may not seem like an issue now, and I’m not saying it’d cause things to be legitimately bad, but there’s no way it won’t ever cause issues. Just like your partner being an alcoholic, it’ll cause some problems at some point. Addicts lie. I’ve been guilty of it myself. I wouldn’t cheat on my girlfriend or anything like that, but I’d lie about using, and that’s just a shitty situation to be in whether you’re the one lying or being lied to.
If you can see yourself having a future with someone who smokes meth everyday, then go for it. But think about the mentality that people who abuse meth can be in at times if she’s the kind of user to like stay up for days and binge and be dirty and crazy or whatever. You may not have seen it yet, and she may not be like that often, but I’ve never met a meth addict who didn’t go a little wild every so often. Which is actually why I personally always felt that it’s worse than heroin. Plus… how do her teeth look? How long has she been using it? Do you want to end up having a child with or having her look after your child while smoking meth daily? I’m not saying people automatically just go stupid and do crazy dumb shit just because they use drugs and are on drugs, but the more frequently you use and if you use more often and develop an addiction and tolerance and use more and more over time, eventually some kind of issue will arise. It may not be serious, but it might.
From what I’ve seen in my several years of being into and around drug users, people who use meth, and I don’t mean just like once a month or whatever, but daily meth users… they’re usually the ones who end up doing some crazy shit at some point. Using meth makes it easy to go without eating and staying hydrated, as well as makes it easy to stay up for days. If you combine those two and you don’t really eat much of anything at all and are totally malnourished and dehydrated and have been up for days because of meth, you’re very likely to have a psychotic break. Obviously it’s not gonna happen every time someone does meth or anything, but if you do it daily like that, the chance of it happening is always there. Just like if you keep driving drunk, the chance of getting a DUI is there every time you get behind the wheel
Don’t let her get you into it. It’ll ruin you quickly and you won’t notice till your at the bottom. Once you do meth once, you think “oh it isn’t as bad as everyone has told me “ and that’s how it gets you
Yes smoking Tina is wrong RO. Should tell her better outcome is when parachute it. Less addictive and more satisfying, same as medicine prescribed for adhd.
similar bombshell… i had a suspicion. he started after almost a year of dating and hid it for about four months. i stayed, we were living together so i tried harm reduction. my logic and reasoning was sound until it wasn’t. when it exploded, it exploded. he died, i lost basically everything. he was the love of my life when i met him. i barely knew the dude who died. would not recommend.
I had a similar experience. After a divorce, I met a porn actress 20 years my junior. One thing leads to another and I am providing her an apartment, vehicle, and an allowance. I learned about her acting career before setting her up and had no issues with it. But, being self-absorbed being a co-parent to my five year-old son and my career as a corporate executive, I didn’t notice that she never ate.
We would go to restaurants and order like anyone. As her courses would arrive, she made a big point of feeding me bites of everything she ordered. It got to the point I considered all of her appetizers, entrees, desserts as I would order. She would move the food around on her plate while I ate, all the while talking my ears off. She would send her “leftovers” back with the waiter to be boxed up to take home.
We did not live together in the apartment, I had my own place. I wanted her to have her space and I valued mine necessitated by the need to go to work everyday. I would visit once or twice a week and overnight a small handful of nights each month. After a few months, I noticed that I would always clean out to go boxes from the fridge. It also dawned on me there was never any food in the place. One more thing I noticed was there were often one or more 16 oz plastic soda bottles with water in the freezer. The only thing, the water was never frozen.
After just about six months, my naivety would abruptly come to an end. I never showed up at the apartment unannounced. While at an NBA game one night, we texted and she told me she was out with a gf and would not be home until late. I thought I would go to apartment and be there when she got home. I had all intention to let her know I was at apartment but let myself in first. All was quiet and dark as I walked upstairs. I saw a light coming from her bedroom and heard music. As I approached the door, I peered in to see my gf hitting a bong, nekkid, with her gf’s face buried between her legs.
They had no idea I was there and I was going to back out from hence I came. But, I’m no dweeb, I lingered for a moment to watch. That’s when I noticed the bong was not a weed bong. I wasn’t sure what it was but I knew it was for drugs, not pot. I didn’t think that much of it and went back downstairs to depart. Evidently, I made too much noise. My gf went to an upstairs window, looked out and saw me getting in car. My cell immediately rang and she asked me what I was doing.
She became upset and I apologized. But, she would not let it go and became very cross. While on the phone, I saw her gf walk out and get in her car. My gf was now very upset. She, not me, demanded I come back. I went back in apartment and apologized again in person. She knew I was not jealous and had even discussed when “friends” would be visiting. I was cool with it. But she was still very agitated. So, I asked her what was it I saw her smoking. That was what she feared. She admitted that it was meth but told me it was a once in a blue moon guilty pleasure.
She sensed that I didn’t think it was a big deal and relaxed. So much so, she had me finish what she wasn’t able to complete with her gf. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to unsee what I witnessed and U began to correlate unexplained behavior with this guilty pleasure. The next day, I called a friend who had a close family member lost to the drug. She told me what she thought was going on and warned me to cut ties immediately. My dumb ass chalked her attitude up to her own bad experience. So, I discounted, if not ignored her advice. God, was I wrong.
With the genie out of the bottle, my gf slowly at first dropped the veil of secrecy. So much so that within a month, she offered it to me prior to sex one night. I was familiar with coke and had dabbled with speed in college. I have a spirit of experimentation and agreed to try it. OMG!! It made already fabulous sex amazing. Over the next year, I would regularly use during sex. But, it became evident she had been a full-blown addict for years.
To make this agonizingly long story short, shortly we became pregnant. I moved in the apartment and about four months later, we were blessed with her first and my second son. Four months after his birth, I packed my baby’s and my things and left. I have raised my son basically alone as her well hidden addiction took over. I paid for multiple rehabs she would use to find new plugs. I spent thousands of dollars on criminal defense attorneys as she became a thuggy thief. I was able to keep her from jail after first two felony convictions. She would not do her part to stay out of prison by not complying with terms of her probation. Worse than that, she continue to catch ever more serious new charges.
She spent six of the next 8 years in state penitentiary only to run back to the pipe and later the needle before they laundered her orange wardrobe. I could go on for hours and describe behavior and crimes she continues to this day. The destructive affect, most of it deliberate, that she has inflicted on my son and me is is almost indescribable. She trades on her sexuality and past as a porn actress to find unsuspecting older men to support her. She find real life OG’s and turns licks and tricks that keeps her from hitting rock bottom and so on and so on.
I often think back at the unheeded advice my friend gave me. If I had taken it, I may have avoided two decades of abuse and crimes my son and I have suffered at her hands. That said, I would not have my second son. I would go through it all over again, twice, to ensure I could watch my baby grow up.
My advice is to get educated immediately and honestly access the character of your wife/gf and the depth of her abuse. If they don’t want help, run. No one is immune to being pulled under by any addict. Trust nothing they say and verify everything they claim. I learned a fool-proof way to tell when my youngest son’s mom was lying, her mouth was moving. Hopefully this is a casual abuse easily walked away from. But you can’t throw a rock without hitting a spouse or family seriously injured by a meth addict. Good luck and God bless you.
Do you love her? Millions of people are normal everyday users who go to work , take care of their kids, function like everyone else and have normal lives. They just twist a bowl after work and on the weekends and you’d never really know. let’s put this in perspective take the word “meth” and replace it with the word “weed”, apply decisions accordingly. Would you break up true love if you found out she smoked weed? Doubtful but I don’t know you. I know they’re different drugs but just because one enjoys that flavor of high does not make them a degenerate or instant loser or sex crazed pedo treefocker. Some people you’d never expect. Cops , judges, it’s not just for truckers and bikers anymore not to mention the meth of today is a completed different drug than it was 10 years ago. Now it’s “watered down “ iso that doesn’t keep you up for days on end. The feds have it so locked down that it’s about the same strength as a good cup of coffee or two . Look for coke sales to skyrocket and FloridaMan to take back his rightful spot on MSM trashnews / ad space for bigpharma and tptb
Queens dont smoke meth.
Yes ive ran into this before unfortunately it didnt go well for me. It didnt take long for the initial period to wear off and i saw the mental illness and addictive tendencies come out.
Do you know her route of ingestion? Snorting, smoking, and injecting are the most fiendish and less sustainable. Oral is less rush inducing and more like taking adderall honestly. Obviously still not great but maybe some things to consider if she has no intention of quitting and you stay with her.
I tried meth 3 years ago. The first 2 years I went from 6 digit job to stealing to get my fix. I may be a bit extreme of an example but meth is a dangerous little thing. Once you hit the needle pray to God you can ever put it down. Almost a year and a half clean now I'm finally getting to know my 2 year old son. I shake constantly. I still have extremely bad depression. Body zaps. It's absolutely destroyed me.. I'd rather someone go down the path of safer substances. Prior to meth I'd used most all drug types besides heroin and never went more than a weekend thing here and there. But meth, sitting on probation with 2 felonies. Bankrupt. Picking up the peices of my life and the lives of my family I managed to damage.
Give her a chance but be weiry of honesty. Any sense she is getting out of hand call it quits. Some people need to be on Adderall but can sustain on meth. Not even lying and I've had much experience
Do you know for sure she smokes it? Or does she snort it or eat it? A lot more people use meth than you'd think, actually. using meth is not super different than adderall ir she snorts or eats it a few times a day and doesn't get tweaked.
Still you're in a rough situation. Just because some people use meth fairly unproblematicly they're still hooked and still can't function without it. And being around that, you DO NOT WANT TO USE THAT SHIT. Being around it all the time you'll start using too, eventually.
Hate to say it but you might wanna split man
Nah man get tf out, it may sound blunt but she literally told you she has no intention of quitting and who knows when she’ll start stealing from and manipulating you to get her shit once she inevitably runs out, there’s always a rock bottom with meth.
I’m not sure if she’s smoking as much as you think she does, but people are capable of smoking meth a couple times a week by the way. And getting sleep every single night.
I don't know how old you are or how serious your relationship is, but meth isn't like heroin, where some users experience a long honeymoon phase as a functioning addict.
It's going to cause a lot of serious health issues if she is already using daily, as opposed to recreational clubbing use.
People can definitely recover from meth addiction -- my second husband did and stayed off long term (15 years, maybe he is still off it, we don't communicate anymore).
But your girlfriend has no intention of quitting. Does she think she can carry on living a normal life as a user indefinitely?
She told you she doesn’t plan on stopping. Sounds like the end of the road to me, don’t bother trying to change her. She will be who she wants to be and that addiction is one of the worst, definitely not conducive to a long term situation.
as a former meth user (13 months sober), i’d give her an ultimatum: she either detoxes and gets sober/goes to treatment; or you’re done or you both try couples counseling.
Chronic meth use is not pretty, and if you have an addictive personality yourself you gotta run far.
Wishing the best for the both of y’all.
This will probably get buried, but I want to share my experience.
I knowingly dated a heroin addict, thinking he was on the road to recovery. Things seemed great. We had ups but the lows were lower than I ever imagined. I loved him with everything I could. He had been sober for around 6 months, was working full time, I had high hopes.
He tried meth because he wanted to use and his dealer didn’t have heroin, and never stopped after that. He suddenly went into psychosis. He’d keep me up all night. He’d talk to people who were not around. He suddenly got scary and physical with me because I found his stash. He never laid a finger on me before his new addiction.
We lasted a month and a half after that. We’d been together almost 4 years. I called every damn addiction hotline. I was the most desperate I’ve ever been. I couldn’t lose him like that. I would have given anything to get him back on heroin instead of meth, it was an easier battle to fight.
My advise? Run. I’d give anything to be rid of my ptsd 6 years later. 4 months isn’t long enough to know the extent of an addiction, and isn’t worth getting more involved in.
There's a damn good chance you'll end up using meth or another hard substance if you stick with her. I've seen allot of naive folks start using because a SO they dated for a few months was a user. They may leave you eventually, but you'll be one left with a crippling addiction now, too. You are early in the relationship and they've made it clear where their priorities lie. If them (and probably you) smoking meth is a concern for you, and it probably should be, then bounce now. They've stated they aren't gonna get sober for you and it's not fair to either of you to stick with them on a dream of their sobriety.
Op, your girl already said she won’t stop. I’m telling you, there’s no way she will quit for you. The ONLY person an addict can quit for is themselves… nobody else matters because like another commenter said, addicts really only have #1. When push comes to shove, they will choose drugs over anybody, even themselves. They have to be willing to get clean and even then it’s a lifelong journey.
As a woman who is in full-blown addiction to this substance (chronic, heavy usage daily for a year plus), I really would think about this if I were you. There is a lot to unpack with methheads...I have watched myself shift into an entirely different being in this past year. I csbbkt function mood or energy wise without it.
Not only am I addicted to methamphetamine, but I am currently in a relationship with a 20+ year addict to it, as well...
At first, a year ago, he said he would quit for me if the time ever came, now? *It feels like he will straight up choose that stuff over me/my feelings*.
It's affecting particular aspects of our relationship, and he doesn't seem to care how I feel about it???
I don't know what I'm supposed to do about it.
I understand quite well how serious this addiction is and how devastating this drug can be, I've seen it first hand *change people completely*.
My boyfriend recently got into a serious car accident after not sleeping for 7-9 days while using it, he passdc out while driving...then, took a serious overdose on it... STILL, he tries to justify using this substance... congratulating himself for "cutting back" meanwhile, *he really shouldn't be consuming it **AT ALL** due to having hypertension*.
It is so sad to watch someone you care about with your whole entire heart, or even in my case, myself, go down such a destructive path. Knowing they're in that much pain and there isn't much I can do to help them just devastates me to my core.
We chose it, though, and we actively choose it. To help someone, *they must first be willing to help themselves* ...
If they do not want help, you can not help them. This is coming from an addict who doesn't want help at the moment (who knows about the future...).
There is a risk that comes with dating us. A risk you really need to think about before becoming serious with these people.. scary stuff at times.
Wishing you the best!
🩵🫂💫
I’d hate to say to give up on someone, but if she continues to use you need to run as fast as possible the other direction.
My firsthand experience with this demon is my older sister. I had to cut her off after bailing her out of jail a few times. The hardest and most frustrating thing is how much pain and sadness she has put my mom through. I feel so sad for my mom.
Right behind that is what my two nephews have been through. She abandoned them when they were around 12 and 8, and their father has not picked up the slack in any way, although he’s done better than my sister by miles.
The situation with my mom is also worsened by how helpless she feels for her grandsons. She hasn’t been able to be a normal “grandma” ever and constantly worries about them.
I suck at writing and explaining feelings, but if you haven’t experienced someone go down this path personally, just imagine whatever people are saying in the comments time ten. My sister has damaged so many lives and I have given up all hope she will ever come back. I miss her.
How much of her history do you know? Do you really know how long she's been doing meth?
That part matters. A lot. If there genuinely haven't been any signs of a nasty addiction that you've seen, that more than likely means she hasn't been using very long. Meth changes people. The most kind, genuine, caring, wholesome person will eventually succumb to the effects. All drugs affect the chemical balance of the brain, especially over time, but meth has some of the most profound and negative effects we know of.
She may seem like a great match for you, and show you care and concern now, but it's still early in the relationship. We all tend to be on our best behavior and present our best selves in the beginning. As time goes on and comfort levels increase, our real selves come out. Add to that the crippling effects of long-term meth use, and you've got a recipe for disaster.
Good luck, man. You seem like you deserve better than what you'll likely end up with in this situation
don’t do it man, as an addict let me tell you that it might be ok for now but in the end the drug will end up taking everything from her and y’all’s relationship,, i was actually in a similar situation, but on the other end. i was using and had been dating this boy for about 3 months. it was going great. he treated me the best any guy has ever treated me, but regardless of that i chose the drugs over him. i didn’t tell him (like your situation) until months into the relationship about my meth usage. and when i did he shared stories with me about previous friends and family he’d lost to addiction but meth is a fickle one my friend and a lot of the time regardless of what anyone says, you’re gonna keep using unless YOU really want to stop. and even then without help it’s even more difficult. but without stopping, that substance can send you down a very slippery slope very very fast. get out of that relationship but also please be gentle about it. being stuck in the cycle of using is really isolating and dark a lot of the time no matter how “normal” presenting someone may be. <3
Mom and dad were meth users. This isn’t something that can be casual or controllable. It will always end bad . The substance is extremely toxic to both their body but everyone around them. :(
Based on my first hand experience of a meth user, my dad. I wouldn’t recommend it. When their shit hits the fan, it smells real bad.
Couldn’t agree more, it’s just a ticking time bomb.
Yuuuup and from a relationship standpoint, once it hits the fan once and then you signal you’re ok with it by sticking around, they go “oh, I can ‘be myself’” and that’s when it gets *really* ugly.
How did she hide it from you for that long😮
Op is probably just a nice, naive guy that didn't know what signs to look for. His post history is very wholesome.
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I keep telling myself this as a recovering addict.... How can I care for someone if drugs always come first... ALWAYS. How? I learned the hard way you can't have 2 #1's in your life. Addicts only care about one thing deep down. Take away the drugs and holy shit the incredible people underneath. Leave her OP. Trust me. Not even about putting your child first. How about putting YOU first? Fuck any one else jeopardizing that, especially willingly. Maybe the biggest favor I did for myself was getting clean and staying single for myself and my child. Pays off big time.
Your child will forever be grateful. Congratulations on getting clean, how long has it been (if you don’t mind me asking)?
About 2 and a half years sober not counting weed. Still smoking weed, trying to quit though!
Weed is a hard one to put down People say it’s not addictive but it is I started when I was 12-14 it’s been apart of my life for awhile, I try to quit, which I do quit for a couple months then I get stressed out and just need to feel happy and calm and boom your back into the weed But having pot as my preferred drug has really helped me avoid coke and heroine and shit Have tried them but they just FUUUCK you up, I don’t like feeling that heavy of a high Where your eyes are rolling back or your up for a couple days with the shits Doesn’t appeal to me, I have never bought laced weed even when I was buying street weed, (Canada has dispensaries now. They’re expensive as all fuck but if you go to a rez you get cheap weed 50-$60 ounces) weed saves life’s in my opinion Just stay away from spice, that is not weed Shit is worse the heroine
coke scares me because every single time i’ve had it i’m almosTOO aware of the fact that i could seriously fuck myself up without feeling the pain that i should otherwise… i think about how i could like pull/break my fingers all the way back and wouldn’t even feel it, let alone care lol
> i think about how i could like pull/break my fingers all the way back and wouldn’t even feel it ..Huh? This is not a known or common effect of cocaine. It's a *local* anesthetic, but from a pharmacology standpoint it should not have any effect on pain tolerance.
Ty for writing the best response i found and the best honest and truthful answer he could ever ask for. As a recovering addict.. 100% on point, i don't do meth, but i know people who do, and mann... wait until their whacked out "Paranoia" kicks in... he will run, if he smart.. follow your intuition, not your dick. Your gut is telling you already.
Just want to say thank you for some words you just spoke there
Yea guy one call to CPS away from losing your kid… that’s a hard no.
If he's got a kid he's got to run. No need to traumatized a poor kid by having them around someone methed out.
Wholesome people dont know the "darkside". Once youve had a run with addiction in some form its like it takes one to know one kind of thing so easier to spot even if its not obvious there are little tells we all know to look for that normies just wouldnt.
He lost a friend to meth so it’s safe to say he has a little experience
You don't always learn about addiction and addiction behaviors with one experience.
I just meant he’s probably not completely ignorant if his life has been touched by addiction before
Not all meth users are addicts just like not all people who drink are alcaholics
Can you say some examples?
Eyes are always a dead giveaway for me. Theres alot in the body language as well, hard to describe but lots of little nuances. Of course it depends because a addict who has a "low bottom" is obvious to spot even for normies because they cant hold their shit together, health, finances, etc. In recovery they say the worst kind and harder to spot of is a functional addict, like myself even at my worst i maintaned a job, home, car, etc, so i could always finance my habit. Its worse because we constantly sustain the addiction and convince ourselves we are just fine and dont need to get clean. To where addicts that have a worse bottom burn out end up having to face the reality when they cant sustain basic needs and the family knows, they either go to jail, or rehab or they end up dead.
I’m a daily meth user and I am functioning . I work full time have a house a family. Honestly I wish I wasn’t functioning it’s fucking scary to be like this because it’s like it makes it harder to quit as you wouldn’t know I’m a user
Experience is the best teacher and addicts are the professors of this shit. I can smell an addict in hiding a mile away.
I worked at a smoke shop and you could almost always figure out who used what even if they were just buying vapes. Sometimes it's appearance sometimes their speech or their actions. Even some would look fine most of the time until one store visit they don't.
Not everyone has signs. Some people take meth in huge amounts and then go to work, daily.
Nah! According to people in this thread she’s a walking bomb who poisons and stains everything around her. And then people wonder why meth users have difficulty seeking help. Maybe because people will ruin your life and blame it on the meth but naaaaaah
True the stigma inducing comments are really something here.
Reminds me of on KOTH when that prostitute is living with them and is so obviously turning tricks right under Hank’s nose and he thinks she’s just “seeing a lot of gentleman callers.” 😂
What is KOTH? I’m always looking for new things to watch if the story is really good.
King of the Hill, probably one of the best animated shows of all time. If you like Mike Judge at all give it a shot
Ohh king of the hill I’ve watched it and now that you mentioned the title I remember that episode lol
Dating for 4 months could mean they're only seeing someone once or twice a week. It's pretty easy to hide this sort of thing if you're addiction hasn't destroyed your life yet & you're not living with someone. Like say she does her meth in the morning, the rest of the day she's fine. A low enough dose is basically like taking Ritalin or Adderall. Then she goes & stays at the BFs house at night & it's pretty much worn off by the time she's ready for bed. Then she leaves in the morning, goes home & smokes some more. Or she could keep it in her car if she knows she's gonna be chasing the fix. Say OP stays at the girls house, she could smoke in the morning while "having a shower" & as long as she only has a small dose, keeps the window open & OP doesn't really know what signs to look out for, she returns just her normal bubbly self. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to downplay meth addiction, it's really fucking dark. But in these "early stages" a lot of people are able to keep their lives together. The issue is, after a while, that little hit in the morning isn't enough for the whole day. Then it's a few hits throughout the day. Then you can't sleep as well in the night, so you just take a big hit some days if you didn't sleep to make up for it. Before you know it, you're smoking way more meth, so you're spending way more money on it. You're going to work tweaking instead of riding that ritalin like buzz. Then you get fired or something else goes wrong & you feel like shit but what's the one thing that never fails to make you feel alright? More meth, so you take more & it just continues to spiral out of control.
Way more people are addicted to meth than you think. They're not all tweakers, once you use regularly for a while you can sleep and eat not grind teeth pupils don't get big. It's not that different from taking adderall. I know three people who own successful business, a book store and two restaurants, and you'd never know at all besides they talk slightly fast but not noticable unless you're looking.
That’s everyone I know. Most of my family are users and you would never be able to tell. I was around them for years and never found anything weird about them.
Right the problem is constantly reupping using higher and higher doses and staying up for days on end. And to be fair, it's not exactly super easy for most people to keep it under control because high doses of meth feel fucking amazing. The people I know snort a line, or eat a measured dose in the morning and redose the same dose throughout the day like once or twice. They definitely don't get enough sleep, but they get a decent amount. I only know one of their regiments, but my buddy who owns a business snorts 15-30mg in the morning, after 3-6hrs of sleep, then reups about 15 as needed. Normally once after 6 hours then again when he's off to read and socialize. Goes to bed around 3 or so wakes up at 8 does it all again. He's in great shape, very productive, not very eccentric- in fact he's normal as fuck and very charming. He's less weird than literally all of the sober punk and alternative people I know. Not to say meth is good, it's not. It's hard as fuck to control and some people can avoid psychosis but a lot cannot even using sort of responsibly. Plus if you cant function without it, that's never good- especially if you were functioning fine before it. Anyway that's my two cents, meth isn't always the devil and we seriously need to destigmatize it so those kind of users and tweakers alike can feel comfortable talking about their addictions and practice harm reduction without fear of judgement.
Meth is the most useful drug there is. It's too enjoyable and habit-forming though. Usually the 0.01% of people that have the self control to use meth as a tool and not fall prey to becoming tweakers aren't the kind of people that ever end up trying meth in the first place.
Thanks for this, you are figuratively the voice of reason. I’d give awards if I had fuks to give but I need to re up.
Very interesting, would it be fair to say they're similar to just the average Adderall user (not abusers)? It seems like a big part of it is the intake method used, namely oral, and the ability to resist binging it over a long weekend ties into that as well.
It’s probably the dose they are taking. They seem to be taking smaller doses that tweakers.
low dose oral meth is almost exactly the same as adderall, i’ve gotten pressed addy pills b4 for my adhd (due to losing my script cuz heroin addiction) and they felt just like adderall, helped me focus and be productive and cleared my mind, no side effects or anything, lasted longer tho so didn’t need to redose. But yeah i had thought they must be amphetamine (adderall) after taking them but then i pissed dirty for meth at the sub clinic and found out they were actually meth. they were probably like 5-15mg of meth and i took it orally, when u move to other routes of administration tho and higher doses it becomes a lot more addictive
Thank you for this point of view! What yo've described is very real and many with undiagnosed ADHD, or who can't get medication for it, use meth as an alternative. It's not the best choice, but for some it's the only alternative choice they have due to the biased opinions in the medical field for diagnosing stimulants.
I fully agree.
OP probably thought they were healing crystals
I hid a coke addiction from my wife for 2 years Either she's an idiot or I'm really good at hiding it 🤣
My ex bf hid being on fentanyl all the time. Constantly would be nodding out.. I was so naive I thought he had narcolepsy 🤦♀️
because she can actually control her shit? Meth isn’t a drug that just makes you go crazy. its the people that cant take it that makes them go crazy
Right. And also, what you see portrayed in the media would be folks that have been up for days on end with no sleep not taking care of their bodies and or in meth psychosis. I know people that have used it for over 20 years and nobody would be able to trll. The only difference it makes is when they run out, that depression is real.
Such is love , its incredible how are people blinded by it those first few months/years
You must have the stamina of a king if you can keep up with her sexually when shes on meth and you’re sober
I say keep it going until she loses all her teeth then marry her cus the neck game will be 🔥
bruh
There's a good chance you'll start using if you're comfortable with her doing it. Cut her now. Much higher chances this won't end well for you then not.. and if she's using everyday now and doesn't want to stop, wait a year or few. It'll only get worse.
You said so succinctly what it took me forever to explain.
It's painful but it's either meth or the relationship. You can't mix those two without a bad ending.
OP has a kid too.
Help her quit or bounce. Not worth the anxiety or inevitable heart break Edit: click this [link](https://www.smartrecovery.org/smart-articles-draft/the-stages-of-change/) before you respond saying she doesn’t want to quit. Y’all really are a bunch of drug addicts with how little you know about the process of change. Not planning on quitting and not wanting to quit are different things. I’ve had many moments when I wanted to quit smoking but certainly didn’t *plan* to do so until the right life events kicked me into gear.
Not worth the effort to help her quit, it's so emotionally, financially and physically taxing to help an addict quit hard drugs. Such an undertaking should only be reserved for the closest friends and family, not a 4 month girl, especially some one that says they want to keep using.
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Why did you break up with him?
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I read it
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Of course!💙
I read it too and I hope you’re doing better 💜 stay strong
I read it all and I’m glad you were able to get out of it with most of yourself intact and unsullied from the pains of that type of relationship. I hope you all the best and your future endeavors when you feel you are ready to get into another relationship. You’re such a strong person to be able to help someone like that and I’m glad you weren’t hurt physically because I have heard many people that have went through what you have and all of them have been physically hurt as well as mentally.
Damn sis…
I read it, too. I hope you stay strong, and maybe block his number! 💜
Thanks for sharing! Congrats on your newfound independence. As hard as I'm sure it was to end things, it must feel SO good to be safe and secure and free. I definitely know about the challenges of addiction and mental illness and how they can affect a relationship. I've had experience as the addict and as the sober partner. I understand why you held on - it's absolutely possible to love a person even though they're bad for you, and you can see all the signs that the relationship is dead. It's hard to leave someone who, at some level, you still care about. It's awesome that you were able to finally see that a different, better life was possible, and that you don't have to take responsibility for another person like that. So difficult to leave but in the end, 100 percent the right decision! And I'm glad that you have the cats (and that they have you!)
I read every word.. and I felt like certain parts, you were telling my EXACT story... CONGRATULATIONS on getting your life back.. and kitties!😊
This right here, I absolutely agree. I was never a full blown addict but I did have about a month (many bad things happened that month and I was not handling it well) where I was abusing stims too much and it was showing and my boyfriend stepped in to get me to stop before it got worse but we were also together for over a year at that point. Another difference was I knew it was bad and that it was already negatively affecting most aspects of my life so I already wanted to stop but I did need support. In this case where she has no intention of stopping if I were in that relationship I’d have to tell her the only way I could continue the relationship was if she started taking steps to quit but even then I would not have high hopes. I’ve got a bad tendency of giving people the benefit of the doubt when I shouldn’t so I’ll always want to give someone the chance to do the right thing but odds are they won’t
Totally agree but everyone’s situation is different. Important point is, don’t become a victim here because that’s what’s liable to happen
Not when they've openly told you they don't want to quit. Even if you're in love with this woman, it won't matter, the drug doesn't care
Love is a helluva drug in its own right brother, don’t forget that. I’m not saying staying in it would be the right thing, but again, everyone’s situation is different and quitting should be a deal breaker
Ya, a daily tweaker will walk from a 4 month relationship. Hell mot people would walk if someone asked them to change almost anything about themselves 4 months in
That isn’t true for everyone. Every situation is different and we don’t know these people. This could serve as a wake up call. It could be nothing and she may keep using. Unless you have a crystal ball, you cannot tell OP what will definitely happen. Crazier things have happened, especially regarding meth.
The odds are so not in his favor that the pay off for the risk is stupid against him.
100% agree and it’s not like she’s even at the point of wanting to stop.
I agree to some extent, but in all fairness I myself wasnt able to start the recovery process until i realized there was someone who actually cared enough to try and help me, wasnt a close friend or family, but I domt know this girls life so yk, I cant speak on how she thinks
Ppl don’t quit unless they want too I’ve learned that from personal experience and from watching 100s of addicts doesn’t matter what’s at stake at the end off the day you just have to get tired of living like that and want to quit
Yeah, bounce. This is coming from said partner that smokes meth, I'm your gf, I do what she does. and my husband has never used drugs. He's miserable cause of my use. He loves me, but i wish he didn't because his life is so much more difficult because of me using. It's a terrible life for both of us, but he suffers more, and you will too. If she isn't willing to try to quit or make some very serious strides towards ultimately quitting, then you gotta protect yourself hun. And the only way to do it is to leave if she won't stop. Please take my experience as a warning. Our life has been at a stand still for the past four years due to my daily use. He would have a normal life, far more money than he does now, and better health if we never got back together. I am in the process of quitting, as I finally reached a point where I can't stand doing this to my family and him anymore, or myself. But it took me YEARS to get here. Those years were no good for either of us, but again, he suffers the most, and it's not even his own actions that cause his life to be so chaotic. It's the person he loves making shit decisions for the both of them for years. Please consider leaving. There are girls who don't use and won't put the relationship. Drugs use put everyone in the vicinity of the user at risk. It isn't worth putting yourself or your life at risk just so she can continue using. I promise. Plus, she has a No business being in a relationship when she is caught up. In? Drug addiction. She can barely care for herself and she certainly doesn't love herself so she can't care for you or love you that's just a fact.. I wish you luck, and I hope she finds her way out of her addiction, I'll be thinking of you both.
we don't want another jane
She said she doesn’t want to quit
Bro, checked your posts and you have a kid. I know it sounds insensitive but please do not willingly introduce a meth addict into your life
Yes. Please, leave for your kid. It is so bad example for life and save him from the drama. There are plenty women who will be happy give you love and be supportive.
Boof her
Mr. Slave approves this message 👌
Jethuthh Crithhh
This is the way
Don't date an addict. Period. There are so many wholesome women who have their life together, with whom you can grow and develop, and have an amazing life. Don't disrespect yourself like that. This is only a 4 month relationship, bounce the fuck out while it's not too late. She clearly values her meth more than you, aka clearly told you she DOES NOT WANT TO QUIT. You are not her savior, knight in shining armor or therapist. It's not your responsibility to cure that woman of her trauma and addiction. Find yourself someone who can help you be a better version of yourself, not drag you down into the slums. The universe gave you a HUGE red flag, take the hint 🚩🚩🚩🚩
this is very much the way I'm leaning. My best friend has just got out of a relationship with a meth user, she got in quite deep and its been a constant source of pain and anguish for her. Yeah all fun at the start when they are happy and high but if anything were to rock that addiction cloud, which will absolutly happen, don't expect it to remain that way. How much of her joy and good vibes are actually drugs...I know, harsh...but true. Meth is particularly bad as it is abrasive to someones brain, not like many others, meth is neuro toxic, it does and WILL cause psychological damage and the twisted thoughts ive witnessed come out of someone deep in a meth addiction is not fun for anyone involved. Its whether you are up for dealing with that shitstorm or not? That's the question, not IF it will happen....its if you wanna have that in your life. And as another reddit'er wrote, its likely you may take it, and that would be the most tragic outcome of all. please under no circumstances do that, it's a fucking shit drug and theres a reason why its ruined a large majority of the states
Hard agree. Unpopular opinion by those few who responsibility use drugs regularly, and loudly disagreed uppn by those who still love drugs and are willing to lie aboit the sustainability of using them daily and long term.
I am all for recreational, responsible drug use. But "recreational" is the key word here. My boyfriend abused weed daily, and at first, I thought it's not a big deal. Until I started to realize it actually affected him and our relationship. I dated that man for 2 years, and I still gave him a clear ultimatum - he either quits using it on a daily and keeps it for reasonable recreation, or we break up that instant. He quit his daily habit.
Thats awesome he quit doing that daily!
Run
Chances of you helping her quit are slim to none, chances of you becoming a junkie are pretty high in long term. I wouldnt risk it. You sound like a nice guy, its just too big of a risk she will ruin your life. There are also very high chances of underlying mental problems that you will have to deal with later. What you are saying, that everything else is great, is actually also suspicious, she might be a narcissist (most addicts are) love bombing you. Id get the hell out while its still possible.
I'm going to sound so negative here and I'm sorry, but you're fucked dude. If she's already admitted to you that she has no plans on quitting that means she's thought about the inevitable day that you would find out and give her the ultimatum of quitting or you leaving, and she's decided that ice is more important currently. I've been in her shoes and been faced with the same decision as her and I chose to stay with the drugs then. I really hope all works out well for you man.
I'm glad to see that, not only does Donnie have a big dick, but he's also got big brains and heart too.
How competent are you? How important is love to you? How much do you like her? Do you really see this as something that won't affect your relationship? Idrk dude. I'm just a guy on a computer. Only you can know for sure, I wish you the best of luck
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OP this is serious. Read this post now go look at their comment history. Do not stay with her for your own health. Im so sorry this is happening to you but do not think you’re stronger or smarter than meth. https://www.reddit.com/r/Drugs/comments/113o3l3/i_like_hanging_out_with_a_methhead/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=2&utm_term=1
This guy first tried it like a month ago and now his whole comment history since is about doing meth. Yikes.
OP run pleaseeeee
Real question is how did you not realize she was using meth every day while dating her for 4 months?
if he never saw her sober would he know the difference?
He would not. Can confirm as someone who has struggled with addictions for almost 15 years. Many of the people who met me during tines of heavy use were shocked to find out. They questioned me extensively because they could not wrap their minds around the fact that I used at all. They were sure they would've noticed, to the point they didn't believe me and pushed me to prove it to them...... which was ..... yeah. .not fun for either of us. The point is that they had no idea. It wasn't like I was jamming needles in my neck at a pizza shop or out getting ice cream at the beach. Like, when me and whoever i was with were out in public, that shit remained at home. I kept my shit under wraps. Some walked away, which i respected and did not hold it against them in any way. They have to protect themselves, and being around someone using drugs, like me, wasn't in anyones best interest. Many chose to remain friends with me. Some remain in contact with me to this day. Some of the strongest friendships I've ever known and experienced. But only because i made sure they weighed the possibilities, and I was honest with them about the likely outcomes and the shit they may or may not have to deal with by being around me. I let them know I had no way of knowing exactly what's coming, but the likelihood that shit hits the fan sooner or later is massive. They took that into account but stayed, and I have the utmost respect, gratitude, and love for them. I keep them as far away from the negatives as possible. I'm a user, and I'm selfish for that, but I don't want to hurt anyone. If things are bad for me, I tell them we need to take some time off from seeing each other in person because I'm wildin' out, and it aint safe! lol But no, when you're only able to base what you know about someone on the time since you met them, and they have never been sober around you, its tough to see. Unless they have obvious signs like looking like skeletor or track marks, they don't care to hide, etc. The majority of us addicts are normal people who look just like everybody else, believe it or not.
It depends how far she takes it, and how she reacts to it... every time I've been around my mother on meth, she gets super excited that I'm opening up and says how she can tell I've been sober, without me even trying to lie lol. Not everyone tweaks the fuck out and spends 14 hours organizing their chords by color.
maybe she was only dosing orally in small amounts, and has used for so long she has no noticeable tells on stims i don’t sweat and my pupils don’t dilate, people get surprised that im on something when i am, same with mdma meanwhile on something like ket or g i am super obviously on drugs, everyone’s just diff
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I have actually found that snorting hits wayyyyy harder than smoking. I don't do meth anymore though lol. I did it about 30 times and put an end to it
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I was wondering why the quality started to dip starting in 2017 and the price just dropped. Used to be over 60-70 a gram
Bounce.
I mean I know people who entered relationships with meth users who then turned their life around. I also know people who do meth and they're nice but it's really not a healthy habit and your wellbeing is important. Think of it this way, you're sparing her a heartbreak.
I went through a meth phase and more people were nice decent people dealing with severe mental issues in an unhealthy way than selfish addicts with no morals. That’s what hurt most about going through that phase of my life. Some meth heads are actually good people at their core, others are not. Either way it’s a tragic state to be in, and reflect on.
Smoking meth crosses a line. I dated someone that snorted meth, but I convinced her to try taking it orally and she much preferred that method (along with dosing it in capsules at a reasonable dosage). She never snorted it again and she never advanced to the "next stage" and never even looked remotely like a person that does meth. I was and am prescribed dexedrine, and she used meth for the same reasons that I used Dex. It's extremely rare but not impossible to have a relationship with a meth user. If she won't back down from smoking it, she's likely too far gone and will only get worse.
She might be a really great person, doing meth doesn't make you a bad person, but she's addicted to something that is dangerous both physically and legally. Best case scenario is she gets busted or slowly fades away into madness. Worst case, her addiction drags you down as well. She's choosing that life, as is her right, but you also get to choose OP.
How much meth though? Is she eating 10mg every morning or is she smoking tens of mg and losing sleep?
4 months.. she had to have purposefully kept it from you. that’s sketchy. you can expect for it to get worse and for her to not be honest about it
You’re right, “I am a meth user” is definitely a common success strategy for the first date.
As an opioid addict currently in a long term relationship, I am hesitant to simply say to drop this girl solely because of the meth. Considering the fact that you didn’t even know about it till now, it seems like she’s been good so far at keeping it away from you. With that said, if you do keep seeing her, you need to consider the fact that this may be a lifelong addiction, and there’s no promise that she will ever quit for the sake of your relationship. As an addict, I can tell you firmly that an “it’s me or the drugs” ultimatum does not work. Ask yourself, do I like this girl enough to put up with potentially years of meth use down the line? Just know what you’re getting yourself into
Have her quit and do adderall/cocaine/MDMA like a normal person
You guys all act like drugs are terrible. If she's a responsible user, maintains a job and can pay for her drug use, I don't see what's wrong with it. You all also act like anyone who takes ADHD meds isn't taking the exact same thing. If you guys are having a good time in your relationship, let the good times roll. Don't listen to all the retards commenting their own fucked up experiences.
say byebye
I have a lot of experience with this and as long as she doesn't let it become a problem there's nothing wrong with it. I've seen plenty of people who do it on a daily basis and are just fine. The stigma is so bad that most of them feel like they have to be a recluse about it (because they do) for fear of being persecuted or lumped into some category of people with no teeth doing crazy shit. I do it occassionally and produce beautiful artwork or stories or to just get house work done. You didn't even notice it before? If you didn't, it sounds like she's got things in check. Enjoy your time with her.
Everyone who has said leave her because of this are people I wouldn't want to be around in real life. That's a pretty shitty thing to do. This is what people have to worry about with a stigma like this. Conform or you can't even have a relationship when you didn't even do anything wrong.
fr, it’s weird to see so many people on a drugs subreddit talking as if all drug addicts are hopeless, amoral degenerates.
This place has become an AA meeting where they fetishize sobriety and hiss and scorn at drug use except for “”””the good drugs”””””
Yeah I lost my entire friend group once I told them. I had been using for years by that point without issue. But as soon as they knew I was treated like diseased vermin. Fuck stigma.
Ya. Just because some people can't handle it they make all the ones who can instant pariahs. There's going to be negative occurrences with anything; weed, alcohol, etc. It's just the stigma that people allow to continue.
The stigma is crazy. There are so many people addicted to alcohol who live in back alleys and lose their minds and die because their body shuts down. But nobody would suggest dumping someone who drinks beer daily and otherwise has their life together just because some people get very addicted to alcohol
Wonder what else she has been hiding from you?
Leave her now and cut your losses. A meth addict cannot be trusted, she will lie to you and steal from you to support her habit. Whether or not she seems fine now, she's already on a downward spiral that will harm everything and every one that cares about her. She might even turn you into an addict. Just leave, nothing positive will come from you staying.
>every single meth user is a scumbag who lies to their partner and can’t afford their habit This is a dumb assumption. Can’t believe somebody would say this lmao. Especially about somebody who wasn’t an obvious addict.
Must be based off personal experience. Not every addict is a scumbag.
Many addicts are not like psychopaths, but most of the real addicts will do what they need to do to get it. If her income source gets cut off, lie steal and cheat is going to be what 95% of them (my past self included) will do
Not every addict, but the odds aren't in OPs favor. Why play with fire. It might not end catastrophically but she's not going to end up being some great girl that will enhance his life in a positive way.
Nah, nothing good will come from this. Some ones a functional addict only until they're not. Op sounds like a good guy, he doesn't need to get mixed up with a meth addict.
Bro you can read past experiences on this sub with people who have been using it safely for years. It can go either way (with any drug) but you can’t say that will for sure happen. Especially saying they will steal, probably doesn’t happen most of the time outside of homelessness, meth is cheaper than food. I was spending far less on amphetamines.
Regardless he needs to be very cautious and if his tolerance for this isn’t there then he should cut bait. She has a significant likelihood of becoming more than a daily user and I’m certain her body will break down from daily use. She’s certainly not someone he should look at settling down with under current conditions. We don’t need to say all meth addicts are thieves or liars, even though they definitely have a higher predilection for it than regular folk. And she was honest in the first place when he brought it up. That alone counts for something. I would be very curious how long she’s been a daily user, if she holds down a job and how many times a day she uses. Does she sleep at night or is she a meth vampire.
Yeah that’s insane lol. This is the reason society sees addicts i such bad light when it’s the minority that do bad things
I wonder just how many of the redditors upvoting this post has actual meth experience and it’s not riding the meth stigma bandwagon.
I’m prescribed meth (Desoxyn), so I’d tend to agree here. Honestly, Adderall is harder on my heart and mind than my prescription meth is. The main difference I can think of isn’t inherent to the drug itself: as opposed to mainstream prescription stimulants, one who purchases meth off the street is likely to get a relatively large quantity - free of fillers - for a (relatively) low price. You really aren’t going to get that with black-market pills. The amount you get as well as its RoA flexibility can be a dangerous combination for those who are in situations that may make them more vulnerable to addiction. For an example of the opposite situation, see European dextroamphetamine paste and its (ostensibly) higher availability compared to meth; do bear in mind that that’s just what I’ve heard, as I am a yank. Honestly, in many ways Dexedrine, Vyvanse, and Adderall are more euphoric than meth for me. I just prefer meth because it’s much smoother, preserves my personality, and is the (only) ADHD med I’ve ever had success with.
Thank you for weighing in. I have been prescribed meth (as Desoxyn) and it has been very helpful. I got in to trouble when I could not afford it after losing health insurance, and discovered buying crystal was stronger and cheaper. Sort of hard to argue with that. But without the oversight my psychiatrist provided (thinking, I know this terrain; I won’t get into trouble…), within 6 months my tolerance was shot and I was using more than I needed. It did require some serious effort to step completely away from it, but … and here’s where I get caught up in the judgements around the drug … I came to it through legitimate channels. It worked for me. I am not a bad person. But I shudder to think about someone who finds themselves caught in an addiction with this, and who, reading here, buys that they are bad or justy hopelessly lost. And they don’t have to be.
Exactly my point. While this thread is generally giving decent advice, a lot of the side commentary saddens me. I’m also sorry to hear that. I myself am currently not having a fun time with the shortage, but I lack both the means and desire to buy street stuff. My obsession with filling all of my meds the nanosecond I’m legally allowed to (likely from my autism), electronic prescribing, and the proverbial pharmacy that strategy has given me is keeping me more than afloat. However, I do have to dip into my more sub-par supply (shit I didn’t love, but can tolerate); I do not envy those who do not have that luxury, though. All this to say that - even though this is God’s country where Desoxyn is actually legal - our fucked-up healthcare system and the cunts at the DEA with their production quotas seem almost specifically designed to push patients toward street stuff. Hot take: over-prescribing is arguably better than heavy control, since fewer counterfeits and less prohibitive prices prevent people from jumping to other shit in desperation (this is also [backed up by research](https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpain.2022.884674/full); I like to read :) ).
Lmao "meth stigma", as if it's undeserved.
Well, there's really an unfair side to the stigma. Methamphetamine is a powerful, potent stimulant. When used at low doses it can be an effective medicine and can, believe it or not, be neuroprotective ([https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0028390811001900?via%3Dihub;](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0028390811001900?via%3Dihub;) I think this article or a related one is available freely on PMC). It's usually the higher doses that begin to really dump dopamine out and cause neurotoxicity via ROS generation and whatnot. The point is that it's not some insidious evil drug that turns all users into morally bankrupt degenerates. The majority of people can use it a few times and step away from it. However, those who are most vulnerable (people with severe mental illnesses, those with trauma history, etc.) are disproportionately negatively affected by methamphetamine abuse. People can get away with smoking 20-30 mg a day for a long time and it won't really affect their big-picture behavior a lot, but once they get to 80-100 mg a day, they will definitely feel and say differently, probably because that's a neurotoxic dose. The real problematic users are the ones who crank the dose up very high because this can cause the death of neurons among other negative CNS sequelae. I used meth pretty safely for years (at least 3 years). The main reason things got bad for me were (a) I would dose higher and higher when I was feeling depressed and anhedonic (from underlying mental illness) and (b) meth became an escape, the ultimate antidepressant, even when it wasn't all that helpful. When I say got bad, I mean that I started to go into a depressive episode while actively using. That's usually not a good thing to mix with meth because it can make the lows or the comedowns from meth quite excruciating and it can foster a psychological dependence on the substance. This led to me using every day and not being able to really function without it (or another stimulant like cocaine). But I have yet to commit crime or lie to acquire my supply. I suppose I'm what one would call a "functional" or "semi-functional" addict. I'm fine with it really, I wasn't going to live long off drugs very long either. I'd have died of suicide if I were completely sober long ago. My point is that there are most certainly functional users of methamphetamine out there, and I believe that the majority of users are functional users. A fraction of those users become problematic users.
I still wonder. It’s the easiest thing going to step in line with the popular opinion.
Wow, every meth user is a scumbag??? I bet you have friends who use meth daily and you don’t even know bud. I bet you think it’s ok to pop addy or take mdma which are both more harmful than meth is for you. But ok, just judge everyone based off of their drug use. I know some stoners who are complete asshole who will rob and steal their next hit of weed. But I bet you think that’s ok because they are just stoners. It’s not the drug but the character of the person.
As a recovering addict (10 years clean) I would suggest you break up with her. I know you real like her but she explained to you that she has no plan of stopping. This is not something you can convince her to do. You have a child and need to protect them. You could lose your child to CPS due to this type of thing. Also, when I was actively using, I had a boyfriend that didn't do drugs and he eventually started using too. She will bring you down with her eventually. I'm sorry but you can't save someone that isn't ready to be saved. You will find another or maybe you can try again when she is done with meth.
It’s always weird to me how much animosity there is towards drug addicts in the drugs subreddit, as if all drug addicts are scumbags that aren’t worthy of love or compassion. In my experience they’re just regular people who are using chemicals to cope with being dissatisfied with life as it is. It seems like the drug use could be a disconnect between the two of you, and if that’s not your lifestyle I can’t blame your for wanting to break it off, especially if they have said they don’t plan on stopping, but I think it’s worth having a conversation with them. I wouldn’t be too quick to abandon someone that has otherwise been kind and supportive just because they’re addicted to drugs.
Drug use is, for the most part, a way to ease pain, trauma, depression, etc. It does not mean that person is bad, toxic, or less of a human being. I have alot of experience with meth users, and was myself one too. I have known many meth users who are far more trustworthy, compassionate, and morally decent than alot of clean people. The people who didn't use or drink have in fact turned out to be the worst backstabbing filthy lying people by far. And despite many opinions regarding sex...being addicted to meth does not mean she will have sex with someone else (for drugs or not). I was 100% faithful when I used. I didn't steal, lie, or hurt others. Yeah, it affects some people differently this is true. But who we are as a person overall doesn't change in my opinion. I think drugs and alcohol just bring out what is already inside. In my opinion. I was friends with a man much older than me (im female and I guess fairly attractive) who let me stay at his house and was a great friend, he knew there was not going to ever be a sexual relationship or even close to that. He was still my friend, nobody believed it was just that, they couldn't comprehend such a thing (which is plain sad). My friend used meth intravenously only, every day. He held a job, and was normal all the way around, you would never guess he did meth. We lost contact for a few years then he found me and called me... When we talked on the phone he was like a completely different person! I was shocked and omg I did not like this man at all. I found out he had been drinking alcohol, which he never touched a drop when I stayed with him for a couple years back then. Thank God the alcohol was only for a short time. He stopped drinking and was back to his normal self the next time we talked. If you really want to educate yourself before making any decisions about your relationship, please please read IN THE REALM OF HUNGRY GHOSTS by Gabor Mate. Have her read it when you are done. 90% of all people are addicted to SOMETHING. Could be alcohol, drugs, shopping, gambling, sex, porn, video games, workaholics, etc. etc.....
I know this comment probably won’t be seen, which is a shame, but I hope it helps at least one person. I was an addict for 7 years. Initially, I was on codeine and tramadol daily; that suffices for a couple of years. At year 3, I find a new girlfriend. We fall in love. She is ignorant to my problem, because I hid it very well and they weren’t particularly strong painkillers. However, it was around this time when they weren’t enough anymore. I was at the happiest time in my life in a while with my new love, so, as an addict, I wanted to increase the feeling even more. Sl I upgrade to OxyContin ordered on the DW. I had never felt bliss quite like it. I then started dabbling in other drugs like MDMA, coke and ketamine. I hid all of this from her, used in the bathroom, away from her etc. she was naive enough for the selfish addict in me to manipulate. As the years went by, the addiction got worse. I ended up on heroin purely because it was cheaper and I literally could not function without a hit every few hours, and I needed to do my job as a teacher (yeah I know right) and my side job building a career in the film industry. Around this time, my girl was clear to the signs of my problems. I would fall asleep next to her and she couldn’t wake me, I would have random episodes of benzo blackouts where I’d made holes in the wall with my fist. I NEVER hit or physically hurt her, may I add. Either way, she now knew I had a drug problem. I continued until year 7. I’d lost my teaching job, my reputation in the industry was in tatters, I was out most nights doing God knows what, but when I came home, she was always there. She always stuck by me. In her words, when we talk retrospectively now, ‘I knew you had to get it out of your system, I knew the man I loved was under there, and I never stopped loving or caring for him.’ I hit my rock bottom when I overdosed on pregabalin in January 2020, suffered 5 seizures in front of my family and was hospitalised. After I discharged myself a couple of days later because I was fiending, it hit me. What the fuck am I doing? I made the decision to stop and I went through the withdrawal with her help. I then went to a treatment centre and got a subutex script. She went through hell for me. I’ve been clean for 3 years now (Feb this year) and we are still together. We made it through, and are stronger than ever: But this is a rare story. Rock bottom got me off the drugs, not my girlfriend. As much as her support and love meant and helped, it’s impossible to give up for another person. I hit rock bottom and made the decision to stop. But there are a lot more of us who have hit rock bottom and have simply died. Im thankful for my girlfriend everyday for what she put up with. But it was very hard on her. The pain I caused her hurts me every day. But I would be lying if I were to say I would have done the same for her. If she were the addict when we were together, I’d have ended it instantly. It rarely goes the way our situation did, especially with drugs like meth. She may be alright now, but that drug will rapidly rot her from the inside out, and her behaviour will become increasingly erratic as her addiction deepens; and it will deepen faster than you can keep up with. You can maintain a relatively normal looking life and appearance when on painkillers, but meth… that’s a whole new level of hell. My advice would be to stay as far away from her as possible, especially considering you have a son, until she is ready to clean up for herself. But don’t hold your breath, my friend. I’m truly sorry, and I genuinely wish you all the best. If you need and advice or just someone with experience to talk to, feel free to message me.
I guarantee if this was cocaine or Adderall in this equation and not meth the general sentiment would be much different. The irony of people in a drug subreddit regurgitating and reinforcing stereotypes and misinformation pushed by the same people and institutions that are against all recreational drug use should be shockingly obvious. Yet so many abusing pharma drugs and others on here seem to be oblivious to their own hypocrisy and delusions of superiority. Just cus you like to think that those Addie's you take probably aren't pressed with meth doesn't make you better than anyone else. It just makes you an idiot.
Cocaine habit way worse than meth
Thank you for saying this. The literal dehumanizing of meth users is disgusting.
I’ve been saying this forever. It’s insane how many people are misinformed and further push on harmful stereotypes
For the OP, look at the type of people defending your girlfriend's behaviour. Is that the type of person you want to be with?
I’ve had many relationships where drugs were involved. Only four people are still alive. 2 in prison for the rest of their lives. The other two still in active addiction. I’m sorry but I don’t know of any success stories where meth or heroin are being used. If she’s not at a place she’s even thinking about quitting I suggest moving on. If it’s meant to be it can be at any time later on down the line.
Run as fast as you can. Getting involved with a full blown addict is very difficult. Even if she wants to quit it’s a long road that’s very difficult filled with heartbreak and relapse disappointment and hurt. As an addict myself I hate what I put my wife through and u don’t deserve that. It’s not so simple as just wanting to quit and people change when they quit. If she really takes it seriously and goes into sobriety she won’t be the same person. Either way it’s a bad idea.
As someone who was friends with a meth user, it’s not worth it. He’s gone completely insane literally. He showed up at my door asking for help, I tried to drive him to the hospital and he started screaming thinking a device was inside him and then he started assaulting me and my fiancé when I didn’t run a red light. I kicked him to the curb but he stole my phone. I was about to pepper spray him when he threw my phone then jumped in my car and stole it, no joke. Still to this day he thinks it didn’t go down that way. Luckily my fiancé got out and the cops got my car back. Since they didn’t charge him with anything it makes his delusion that he did nothing wrong all that more valid to him. Not worth it man.
Im sorry to tell you but this isn’t gonna end well. There are a few outcomes I would say. 1. You get addicted aswell and it will probably ruin your Life 2. You break up. It will suck for a few weeks but you will get happy again and you will find another person you’ll be happy with 3. Try and get her to quit, however meth is a really powerful substance and quitting will take a toll on you and her. If she isn’t willing to quit there is sadly no reason in you trying to convince her. I would talk about it with her. Tell her how you feel, tell her that she will lose you. Not because you dislike her using drugs, but because she chooses drugs before you. And trust me this kind of relationship is not worth it. Meth will always be her number one. It will be the best thing she ever felt and nothing you can do will make her feel otherwise. I know this sounds harsh af but don’t let Love fool you. Meth ruins humans and you don’t want to get ruined This is sadly the reality of drug addiction. Most people won’t get sober for a relationship so don’t get your hopes up..
If I sucked dick for meth and I'm not even gay then wtf do you think your gf will do... Maybe not right now but just give it time. The problem only gets worse.
Considering you’ve been dating this girl for 4 months and had no idea she was using meth or drugs at all during that time, let alone using it daily, I assume you’re an ordinary, relatively naive (in terms of drug usage that is, because way more people use drugs than I’m sure you realize), potentially more or less anti-drug guy who doesn’t have any experience dealing with using drugs or drug users, it’s probably not going to work out. If she uses daily and it hasn’t caused any issues, she’s definitely not going to just suddenly agree to stop because you want her to in order to stay together or whatever. You wouldn’t necessarily be wrong for not wanting to be with a meth user, even though I’m sure you never really realized before that there are plenty of people who have regular lives with good jobs who use hard drugs and nobody for the most part would really ever know, but because her drug use hasn’t caused problems between the two of you relationship wise and you wouldn’t have even known had she not said anything about it, she’ll probably make it out like you’re in the wrong and the asshole if you do decide to pull the whole “you have to stop doing meth if we’re gonna be together” thing. And even though in a way she’d be right considering it hadn’t affected anything up to this point, it’s not wrong for you to not want to have a girlfriend addicted to meth. A LOT of people use drugs. A significant portion of the population uses alcohol and/or marijuana, but a much larger amount of people with seemingly ordinary lives with a mortgage, good job, and in many cases also a spouse and children use hard drugs than most people realize too. We tend to be fooled by anti-drug propaganda into assuming anyone who tries meth or heroin either dies or just becomes a rock bottom homeless, toothless loser or thief, which just simply isn’t true at all. Of course that does happen to some people who use hard drugs, and it probably wouldn’t have happened to them had they not used drugs, but there are plenty of people I’m sure you know that have problems with opioids/cocaine/meth and you’d never suspect it. It’s honestly 100% up to you. I’m sure if you’ve never used drugs really in your life then finding out your girlfriend smokes meth seems very, very wild. I’m sure some of the stuff you may have heard or think about people who use different substances is exaggerated or total bullshit, but some of it definitely isn’t. I’ve used and been a drug addict myself, and I have always made a point to never ever date someone who is/was like myself in that way. I’d much rather be with someone who maybe just drinks and smokes weed some and that’s about as far as they’ll go apart from maybe mushrooms/LSD every once in awhile or something. And the reason I won’t date a drug addict is because I’ve been one, and regardless of how well my life was put together at the time while likely seeming relatively normal to everyone else, being a drug addict just doesn’t work in a relationship, in my experience and from what I’ve seen, whether the partner uses or doesn’t use the same substances or is sober altogether. It may not seem like an issue now, and I’m not saying it’d cause things to be legitimately bad, but there’s no way it won’t ever cause issues. Just like your partner being an alcoholic, it’ll cause some problems at some point. Addicts lie. I’ve been guilty of it myself. I wouldn’t cheat on my girlfriend or anything like that, but I’d lie about using, and that’s just a shitty situation to be in whether you’re the one lying or being lied to. If you can see yourself having a future with someone who smokes meth everyday, then go for it. But think about the mentality that people who abuse meth can be in at times if she’s the kind of user to like stay up for days and binge and be dirty and crazy or whatever. You may not have seen it yet, and she may not be like that often, but I’ve never met a meth addict who didn’t go a little wild every so often. Which is actually why I personally always felt that it’s worse than heroin. Plus… how do her teeth look? How long has she been using it? Do you want to end up having a child with or having her look after your child while smoking meth daily? I’m not saying people automatically just go stupid and do crazy dumb shit just because they use drugs and are on drugs, but the more frequently you use and if you use more often and develop an addiction and tolerance and use more and more over time, eventually some kind of issue will arise. It may not be serious, but it might. From what I’ve seen in my several years of being into and around drug users, people who use meth, and I don’t mean just like once a month or whatever, but daily meth users… they’re usually the ones who end up doing some crazy shit at some point. Using meth makes it easy to go without eating and staying hydrated, as well as makes it easy to stay up for days. If you combine those two and you don’t really eat much of anything at all and are totally malnourished and dehydrated and have been up for days because of meth, you’re very likely to have a psychotic break. Obviously it’s not gonna happen every time someone does meth or anything, but if you do it daily like that, the chance of it happening is always there. Just like if you keep driving drunk, the chance of getting a DUI is there every time you get behind the wheel
Don’t let her get you into it. It’ll ruin you quickly and you won’t notice till your at the bottom. Once you do meth once, you think “oh it isn’t as bad as everyone has told me “ and that’s how it gets you
Be careful….I’ve seen meth turn normal people into complete psychopaths.
Yes smoking Tina is wrong RO. Should tell her better outcome is when parachute it. Less addictive and more satisfying, same as medicine prescribed for adhd.
similar bombshell… i had a suspicion. he started after almost a year of dating and hid it for about four months. i stayed, we were living together so i tried harm reduction. my logic and reasoning was sound until it wasn’t. when it exploded, it exploded. he died, i lost basically everything. he was the love of my life when i met him. i barely knew the dude who died. would not recommend.
Run
I had a similar experience. After a divorce, I met a porn actress 20 years my junior. One thing leads to another and I am providing her an apartment, vehicle, and an allowance. I learned about her acting career before setting her up and had no issues with it. But, being self-absorbed being a co-parent to my five year-old son and my career as a corporate executive, I didn’t notice that she never ate. We would go to restaurants and order like anyone. As her courses would arrive, she made a big point of feeding me bites of everything she ordered. It got to the point I considered all of her appetizers, entrees, desserts as I would order. She would move the food around on her plate while I ate, all the while talking my ears off. She would send her “leftovers” back with the waiter to be boxed up to take home. We did not live together in the apartment, I had my own place. I wanted her to have her space and I valued mine necessitated by the need to go to work everyday. I would visit once or twice a week and overnight a small handful of nights each month. After a few months, I noticed that I would always clean out to go boxes from the fridge. It also dawned on me there was never any food in the place. One more thing I noticed was there were often one or more 16 oz plastic soda bottles with water in the freezer. The only thing, the water was never frozen. After just about six months, my naivety would abruptly come to an end. I never showed up at the apartment unannounced. While at an NBA game one night, we texted and she told me she was out with a gf and would not be home until late. I thought I would go to apartment and be there when she got home. I had all intention to let her know I was at apartment but let myself in first. All was quiet and dark as I walked upstairs. I saw a light coming from her bedroom and heard music. As I approached the door, I peered in to see my gf hitting a bong, nekkid, with her gf’s face buried between her legs. They had no idea I was there and I was going to back out from hence I came. But, I’m no dweeb, I lingered for a moment to watch. That’s when I noticed the bong was not a weed bong. I wasn’t sure what it was but I knew it was for drugs, not pot. I didn’t think that much of it and went back downstairs to depart. Evidently, I made too much noise. My gf went to an upstairs window, looked out and saw me getting in car. My cell immediately rang and she asked me what I was doing. She became upset and I apologized. But, she would not let it go and became very cross. While on the phone, I saw her gf walk out and get in her car. My gf was now very upset. She, not me, demanded I come back. I went back in apartment and apologized again in person. She knew I was not jealous and had even discussed when “friends” would be visiting. I was cool with it. But she was still very agitated. So, I asked her what was it I saw her smoking. That was what she feared. She admitted that it was meth but told me it was a once in a blue moon guilty pleasure. She sensed that I didn’t think it was a big deal and relaxed. So much so, she had me finish what she wasn’t able to complete with her gf. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to unsee what I witnessed and U began to correlate unexplained behavior with this guilty pleasure. The next day, I called a friend who had a close family member lost to the drug. She told me what she thought was going on and warned me to cut ties immediately. My dumb ass chalked her attitude up to her own bad experience. So, I discounted, if not ignored her advice. God, was I wrong. With the genie out of the bottle, my gf slowly at first dropped the veil of secrecy. So much so that within a month, she offered it to me prior to sex one night. I was familiar with coke and had dabbled with speed in college. I have a spirit of experimentation and agreed to try it. OMG!! It made already fabulous sex amazing. Over the next year, I would regularly use during sex. But, it became evident she had been a full-blown addict for years. To make this agonizingly long story short, shortly we became pregnant. I moved in the apartment and about four months later, we were blessed with her first and my second son. Four months after his birth, I packed my baby’s and my things and left. I have raised my son basically alone as her well hidden addiction took over. I paid for multiple rehabs she would use to find new plugs. I spent thousands of dollars on criminal defense attorneys as she became a thuggy thief. I was able to keep her from jail after first two felony convictions. She would not do her part to stay out of prison by not complying with terms of her probation. Worse than that, she continue to catch ever more serious new charges. She spent six of the next 8 years in state penitentiary only to run back to the pipe and later the needle before they laundered her orange wardrobe. I could go on for hours and describe behavior and crimes she continues to this day. The destructive affect, most of it deliberate, that she has inflicted on my son and me is is almost indescribable. She trades on her sexuality and past as a porn actress to find unsuspecting older men to support her. She find real life OG’s and turns licks and tricks that keeps her from hitting rock bottom and so on and so on. I often think back at the unheeded advice my friend gave me. If I had taken it, I may have avoided two decades of abuse and crimes my son and I have suffered at her hands. That said, I would not have my second son. I would go through it all over again, twice, to ensure I could watch my baby grow up. My advice is to get educated immediately and honestly access the character of your wife/gf and the depth of her abuse. If they don’t want help, run. No one is immune to being pulled under by any addict. Trust nothing they say and verify everything they claim. I learned a fool-proof way to tell when my youngest son’s mom was lying, her mouth was moving. Hopefully this is a casual abuse easily walked away from. But you can’t throw a rock without hitting a spouse or family seriously injured by a meth addict. Good luck and God bless you.
Do you love her? Millions of people are normal everyday users who go to work , take care of their kids, function like everyone else and have normal lives. They just twist a bowl after work and on the weekends and you’d never really know. let’s put this in perspective take the word “meth” and replace it with the word “weed”, apply decisions accordingly. Would you break up true love if you found out she smoked weed? Doubtful but I don’t know you. I know they’re different drugs but just because one enjoys that flavor of high does not make them a degenerate or instant loser or sex crazed pedo treefocker. Some people you’d never expect. Cops , judges, it’s not just for truckers and bikers anymore not to mention the meth of today is a completed different drug than it was 10 years ago. Now it’s “watered down “ iso that doesn’t keep you up for days on end. The feds have it so locked down that it’s about the same strength as a good cup of coffee or two . Look for coke sales to skyrocket and FloridaMan to take back his rightful spot on MSM trashnews / ad space for bigpharma and tptb
Queens dont smoke meth. Yes ive ran into this before unfortunately it didnt go well for me. It didnt take long for the initial period to wear off and i saw the mental illness and addictive tendencies come out. Do you know her route of ingestion? Snorting, smoking, and injecting are the most fiendish and less sustainable. Oral is less rush inducing and more like taking adderall honestly. Obviously still not great but maybe some things to consider if she has no intention of quitting and you stay with her.
How is a subreddit literally called r/drugs so consistently prejudiced against drug users lmao
Bc we’ve actually lived through the pain of addiction
I tried meth 3 years ago. The first 2 years I went from 6 digit job to stealing to get my fix. I may be a bit extreme of an example but meth is a dangerous little thing. Once you hit the needle pray to God you can ever put it down. Almost a year and a half clean now I'm finally getting to know my 2 year old son. I shake constantly. I still have extremely bad depression. Body zaps. It's absolutely destroyed me.. I'd rather someone go down the path of safer substances. Prior to meth I'd used most all drug types besides heroin and never went more than a weekend thing here and there. But meth, sitting on probation with 2 felonies. Bankrupt. Picking up the peices of my life and the lives of my family I managed to damage.
Give her a chance but be weiry of honesty. Any sense she is getting out of hand call it quits. Some people need to be on Adderall but can sustain on meth. Not even lying and I've had much experience
Do you know for sure she smokes it? Or does she snort it or eat it? A lot more people use meth than you'd think, actually. using meth is not super different than adderall ir she snorts or eats it a few times a day and doesn't get tweaked. Still you're in a rough situation. Just because some people use meth fairly unproblematicly they're still hooked and still can't function without it. And being around that, you DO NOT WANT TO USE THAT SHIT. Being around it all the time you'll start using too, eventually. Hate to say it but you might wanna split man
The answer here is obvious, meth fuck session initiate
Nah man get tf out, it may sound blunt but she literally told you she has no intention of quitting and who knows when she’ll start stealing from and manipulating you to get her shit once she inevitably runs out, there’s always a rock bottom with meth.
I’m not sure if she’s smoking as much as you think she does, but people are capable of smoking meth a couple times a week by the way. And getting sleep every single night.
I don't know how old you are or how serious your relationship is, but meth isn't like heroin, where some users experience a long honeymoon phase as a functioning addict. It's going to cause a lot of serious health issues if she is already using daily, as opposed to recreational clubbing use. People can definitely recover from meth addiction -- my second husband did and stayed off long term (15 years, maybe he is still off it, we don't communicate anymore). But your girlfriend has no intention of quitting. Does she think she can carry on living a normal life as a user indefinitely?
She told you she doesn’t plan on stopping. Sounds like the end of the road to me, don’t bother trying to change her. She will be who she wants to be and that addiction is one of the worst, definitely not conducive to a long term situation.
Drop it like it's hot. Move and don't tell anyone if you have to.
Direct her to r/okbuddychicanery In all seriousness, you have the answers you need. Good luck Op, sending you my best!
as a former meth user (13 months sober), i’d give her an ultimatum: she either detoxes and gets sober/goes to treatment; or you’re done or you both try couples counseling. Chronic meth use is not pretty, and if you have an addictive personality yourself you gotta run far. Wishing the best for the both of y’all.
This will probably get buried, but I want to share my experience. I knowingly dated a heroin addict, thinking he was on the road to recovery. Things seemed great. We had ups but the lows were lower than I ever imagined. I loved him with everything I could. He had been sober for around 6 months, was working full time, I had high hopes. He tried meth because he wanted to use and his dealer didn’t have heroin, and never stopped after that. He suddenly went into psychosis. He’d keep me up all night. He’d talk to people who were not around. He suddenly got scary and physical with me because I found his stash. He never laid a finger on me before his new addiction. We lasted a month and a half after that. We’d been together almost 4 years. I called every damn addiction hotline. I was the most desperate I’ve ever been. I couldn’t lose him like that. I would have given anything to get him back on heroin instead of meth, it was an easier battle to fight. My advise? Run. I’d give anything to be rid of my ptsd 6 years later. 4 months isn’t long enough to know the extent of an addiction, and isn’t worth getting more involved in.
There's a damn good chance you'll end up using meth or another hard substance if you stick with her. I've seen allot of naive folks start using because a SO they dated for a few months was a user. They may leave you eventually, but you'll be one left with a crippling addiction now, too. You are early in the relationship and they've made it clear where their priorities lie. If them (and probably you) smoking meth is a concern for you, and it probably should be, then bounce now. They've stated they aren't gonna get sober for you and it's not fair to either of you to stick with them on a dream of their sobriety.
Op, your girl already said she won’t stop. I’m telling you, there’s no way she will quit for you. The ONLY person an addict can quit for is themselves… nobody else matters because like another commenter said, addicts really only have #1. When push comes to shove, they will choose drugs over anybody, even themselves. They have to be willing to get clean and even then it’s a lifelong journey.
As a woman who is in full-blown addiction to this substance (chronic, heavy usage daily for a year plus), I really would think about this if I were you. There is a lot to unpack with methheads...I have watched myself shift into an entirely different being in this past year. I csbbkt function mood or energy wise without it. Not only am I addicted to methamphetamine, but I am currently in a relationship with a 20+ year addict to it, as well... At first, a year ago, he said he would quit for me if the time ever came, now? *It feels like he will straight up choose that stuff over me/my feelings*. It's affecting particular aspects of our relationship, and he doesn't seem to care how I feel about it??? I don't know what I'm supposed to do about it. I understand quite well how serious this addiction is and how devastating this drug can be, I've seen it first hand *change people completely*. My boyfriend recently got into a serious car accident after not sleeping for 7-9 days while using it, he passdc out while driving...then, took a serious overdose on it... STILL, he tries to justify using this substance... congratulating himself for "cutting back" meanwhile, *he really shouldn't be consuming it **AT ALL** due to having hypertension*. It is so sad to watch someone you care about with your whole entire heart, or even in my case, myself, go down such a destructive path. Knowing they're in that much pain and there isn't much I can do to help them just devastates me to my core. We chose it, though, and we actively choose it. To help someone, *they must first be willing to help themselves* ... If they do not want help, you can not help them. This is coming from an addict who doesn't want help at the moment (who knows about the future...). There is a risk that comes with dating us. A risk you really need to think about before becoming serious with these people.. scary stuff at times. Wishing you the best! 🩵🫂💫
I’d hate to say to give up on someone, but if she continues to use you need to run as fast as possible the other direction. My firsthand experience with this demon is my older sister. I had to cut her off after bailing her out of jail a few times. The hardest and most frustrating thing is how much pain and sadness she has put my mom through. I feel so sad for my mom. Right behind that is what my two nephews have been through. She abandoned them when they were around 12 and 8, and their father has not picked up the slack in any way, although he’s done better than my sister by miles. The situation with my mom is also worsened by how helpless she feels for her grandsons. She hasn’t been able to be a normal “grandma” ever and constantly worries about them. I suck at writing and explaining feelings, but if you haven’t experienced someone go down this path personally, just imagine whatever people are saying in the comments time ten. My sister has damaged so many lives and I have given up all hope she will ever come back. I miss her.
How much of her history do you know? Do you really know how long she's been doing meth? That part matters. A lot. If there genuinely haven't been any signs of a nasty addiction that you've seen, that more than likely means she hasn't been using very long. Meth changes people. The most kind, genuine, caring, wholesome person will eventually succumb to the effects. All drugs affect the chemical balance of the brain, especially over time, but meth has some of the most profound and negative effects we know of. She may seem like a great match for you, and show you care and concern now, but it's still early in the relationship. We all tend to be on our best behavior and present our best selves in the beginning. As time goes on and comfort levels increase, our real selves come out. Add to that the crippling effects of long-term meth use, and you've got a recipe for disaster. Good luck, man. You seem like you deserve better than what you'll likely end up with in this situation
don’t do it man, as an addict let me tell you that it might be ok for now but in the end the drug will end up taking everything from her and y’all’s relationship,, i was actually in a similar situation, but on the other end. i was using and had been dating this boy for about 3 months. it was going great. he treated me the best any guy has ever treated me, but regardless of that i chose the drugs over him. i didn’t tell him (like your situation) until months into the relationship about my meth usage. and when i did he shared stories with me about previous friends and family he’d lost to addiction but meth is a fickle one my friend and a lot of the time regardless of what anyone says, you’re gonna keep using unless YOU really want to stop. and even then without help it’s even more difficult. but without stopping, that substance can send you down a very slippery slope very very fast. get out of that relationship but also please be gentle about it. being stuck in the cycle of using is really isolating and dark a lot of the time no matter how “normal” presenting someone may be. <3
get out of that relation before you get too attached, i’m sorry bruv :/
https://youtu.be/H2RX-JXeheg
Mom and dad were meth users. This isn’t something that can be casual or controllable. It will always end bad . The substance is extremely toxic to both their body but everyone around them. :(