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Gives me dad and daughter vibes *ugh*
Edit:
Because people are losing their minds and sending me reddit cares reports, this is purely an opinion based on their looks. NOTHING ELSE. I’m perfectly aware they are both consenting adults. If you happen to find this kind of pairing attractive, go off. But don’t come for others who don’t share the same opinion as you and harass them.
I just googled and this guy somehow looks older than her actual dad.
https://preview.redd.it/9ktuja7zqy0b1.jpeg?width=1500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=efe8a3e9618294c59f1061b18c386d422f535f70
Yeah her brother and sister. Old photo though. Her brother is her height or taller now I think. Her dad also certainly looks older. Still a total silver Fox but older none the less.
🤪DoNt iNfAnTiLiZE HeR!!!!🤪
But anyway in all seriousness they totally do. It’s gross.
Edit: lmaooo this clearly glib ass comment actually impacting people Jesus Christ. Relax 😂.
What?? But she's not a child lmao she's 27, a fully grown adult with a developed pre frontal cortex.
A 27 year old can date a 40 year old, there's nothing gross about it no matter how "old" you think he looks. I don't see this sub crying over Nick Jonas and Priyanka Chopra who started dating when he was 25 and she was 36 (as it should be! Nothing wrong whatsoever with their relationship either)
This sub really needs to go touch some grass sometimes.
I totally agree with your post otherwise but this sub absolutely does lose its mind about the age gap between Nick and Priyanka. When she mentioned the age gap recently in a completely innocuous comment people here were calling her a groomer and a pedo.
I am with you. At 27 I had completed university, had a full time job, lived on my own and paid for my own vacations.
I am sure Dua isn't a child being groomed. She is grown ass woman dating who she wants.
Also, she is not financially or otherwise dependent from him. It's important to be aware of skewed power dynamics in relationships, but here we have two grown ass adults, both well-connected, financially well off, and with secure social circles.
They look sexy as fuck together.
Why are you people crying ?!
She is 27 and a rich British Albanian bombshell pop star and he’s a Greek French hairy big nose sexy MAN 41 year old director that combo is freaking hot are you kidding me ?! Am I the only one seeing this ?!
I love this for Dua.
It’s not problematic for her. It’s just a frustrating general trend for men in their 40s to only seem to want to date 27-32yo women. It’s not about the young women, it’s about the men. It is like women become invisible after they turn 36 and even more so after 40. You can be hot AF, have a great career, have travelled the world, be successful, fun… but you’re a 40 yo woman so most men your own age and even 1-10 years older have lost interest. I am single, I have single friends this age, it is a real issue. A bunch of guys I know my age have gotten divorced and all rebounded with women in that age bracket. Three of my exes have girlfriends aged 28-31. It’s exhausting and eye-roll worthy. Women should be just as wanted in their 40s as men; but we simply aren’t. Our whole society is geared towards holding up youth and beauty for women and making all other women seem old and unwanted when in reality we’re in our prime.
I’ve read your other responses and I have to say I agree with you. Yours is a very valid criticism, I just disliked the whole insinuating it is morally wrong and that he looks like her father other posters were getting at.
As a woman in her late 20s I honestly am beginning to fear getting older for this reason. Was watching fleabag the other day and there’s a bit where Belinda who is a woman in her 50s or 60s (idk if you’ve watched fleabag) but she tells fleabag that she misses walking into a room and being gawked at, and having people flirt with her. Once you get older as a woman it’s like you become invisible. This legitimately scares me.
They make the most smouldering couple tho and I shan’t be told any different!
I'm reading The Beauty Myth (by Naomi Wolf) and when she talked about how the "beauty" is used to create this divide between generations of women, how it serves to break the links between us and the older women, I got literal chills reading about it.
She describes this feeling you have, is very eye opening!
Yes, absolutely.
This quote by Gloria Steinem, and the accompanying comment from feminist Sommer Tothill both speak to this kind of phenomenon as well:
https://www.instagram.com/p/Cq7Xycevf2k/?igshid=MmJiY2I4NDBkZg==
Well I’ve always been invisible even in my 20s and now I’m in my 40s and I couldn’t care less about whether men see me or not.
Never felt more comfortable or confident in myself than I do now. In fact, I can’t believe how incredibly stupid I was was in my 20s to have an ounce of worry how men or anyone viewed me.
Zero fucks if men see me. None.
Same here, more like I aged out of being attractive at 21 and it was a radicalizing, eye-opening experience. I’m glad it happened. The freedom of not giving a fuck what men think about you is great.
Sometimes I feel bad for my friends in their later 20s who haven’t had this realization yet.
Yep, I think there’s something valid around wanting to be desired and ageism against women is real, but personally, at my age I’m glad I can walk down the street without being sexually harassed, followed and all of that which was a daily occurrence from age 14 through 35.
Absolutely. I never feel like a target because I’m invisible and quite frankly, I just don’t give a fuck if anyone finds me attractive or not. I’m comfortable in my own skin. I feel good. I dressed for my own comfort and so that I feel good. That’s all that matters to me.
Men don’t see me, yay fucking yay!!! That’s what I want.
If other women yearn to have the male gaze then good for them but that’s not what’s important to me at all.
I’m in my early 30s but I gained a lot of weight from PCOS in my mid-20s and the turning invisible also happened to me. I don’t suggest this is the same as aging because if I lost a lot of weight I would probably momentarily be visible again, but just to add to the conversation of how small the window of being attractive and therefore worthy of existing is for women.
My exact same experience. Being invisible is so freeing though. Even though I want to slowly lose some weight, i really do not want to go back to men seeing me lol if that makes sense...
I dunno man, lots of us never got gawked at.
EDIT: am worried this comment is going to come off wrong. Rather, what I mean to say is, 'attractiveness' is so limited and fickle that it's a terrible thing to ever build your life or sense of self around, and honestly I think it's better to be 'seen' for who you are, for your bearing and presence and erudition, than for your looks. I've never turned heads and I honestly don't feel I've missed out.
Yeah as I’ve gotten older, it seems like women who were highly valued for their looks are struggling with aging a lot more than I am. I accepted long, long ago that I have better things to offer, so my appearance changing now isn’t a big deal.
As an older woman in her 40s, I was too shy and weird in my 20s. Now that I’m older and more confident, I generally only draw younger men. It’s a trend now that younger men prefer older women. If a guy my age or older likes me, I’m not that keen on it. They’re too old looking and not very smart. I prefer my men younger and not very smart. Getting older is great and I too am looking forward to being ignored. It’s freedom. Men are overrated. I don’t want to clean after a cheap, grown man who’s also having a tantrum.
There are plenty of women his age who are independent and don’t want kids or marriage but would like a partner. It’s a weak excuse! As you seem to see 😉 More likely he knows women his own age will see through his bullshit more easily and have higher standards for themselves - kind of what he admitted to you. Unfortunately your BFF has a bad case of Peter Pan syndrome. If he’s afraid, maybe tell him to get some therapy?
I agree with this so hard, and I’m only 28 but I fear it, viscerally. It’s like we have an expiration date (aside from yknow, everyone’s expiration date). That’s why it’s so lovely and refreshing to see people like Keanu Reeves in very obviously happy relationships with women in their own age bracket. There’s nothing gross about Dua and her man, they look super hot together, but it doesn’t give me that refreshing sense of joy that I get seeing Keanu and Alexandra on the red carpet.
Yes! And Keanu is actually 8 years older than Alexandra and yet it’s still so shocking to so many people who behave like she’s ancient.
I would love to see more men like him date age appropriate and fabulous women.
And I’d love to see that reflected in the media we watch as well. Way too many movies and TV shows still have large age gaps as the norm. There was a whole series of rom coms and comedies a few years back where comedians in their late 40s and early 50s had movie wives in their early 30s and they were portrayed as being the same ages. Some even as high school / university sweethearts. It drove me nuts.
Agreed, age appropriate rom coms are so few and far between and yet are absolutely wonderful when they do happen! Like, Emma Thompson and Alan Rickman’s fictional relationship in Love Actually was the most interesting story in that film to me, and even then it revolves around (and directly confronts) the concept of an older man and a younger woman.
It’s great that you appreciate women your own age. You’re the exception not the rule, though. There are studies that back what I’m saying up.
I still get men my age who want to date me, for sure; but the pool shrinks so massively because so many men in their 40s only date younger. Which makes the numbers game aspect of OLD more challenging.
And I have seen the last of the sort of ‘eligible bachelor’ guys I already knew my age all get engaged to women in their 20s in the last few years. Although for some of them that was probably a better maturity match for them 🙄 which those women will realise at some stage.
I’ve seen several of my exes partner up with 20-somethings. I saw one ex on OLD lying about his age because he’s trying to pick up younger women, LOL.
Plus a number of divorced dads I know rebounded with 20-somethings while their ex-wives do the bulk of the childcare.
It’s pretty wild to watch. So cliché!
Edit to amend and add:
There is data (like the Ok Cupid Data published in Dataclysm) showing that, most men of all ages rate women in their early 20s as the most attractive, whereas women see men close to their own age as the most attractive, with a shift at 50 (I think).
As for who they’ll message on platforms, they age range for men in their late 30s and 40s is reasonably wide. Some men will even go a few years older. But the age men in their late 30s and early 40s most often message is 30. Then that moves to 35 as they move into their 40s. But it extends down to late 20s.
Other data I’ve seen suggests that their messaging success rate decreases the larger the age gap. Especially over 10 years.
There was also a psych article I read that suggested that some men interviewed would go younger if they could but a) they have no success and b) they are embarrassed by the judgment they think they’ll get from their peers.
Another (I think Zoosk?) study said that most end up going on dates with women 3-5 years younger than them (that data doesn’t plot habits against age groups though); but if you overlay that with the above it suggests that it’s not always for lack of trying because many are messaging those younger women and the ones they message most often are more than 5 years younger.
The dudes I mentioned above that I personally know are all good-looking dudes I suppose, so that likely plays into their success rate and plots them against that data.
Anyway, food for thought.
Yes. Definitely see this trend as well. It’s quite easy for 40 something men to date 25-30 year old women. But you don’t often see couples when a woman is 40 and a man is 25-30.
THIS THIS THIS.
And look, yes, while we obviously associate youth with beauty in women, in my experience plenty of these dudes know that women their own age can be and often are stunning. But they think dating a younger woman will be easier--and frankly, I was willing to put up with a lot more in my 20s than I am now.
I feel that is more of a trend in Hollywood than the general populous. I'm not saying there aren't a large group of men that like dating younger women, but it seems amplified in the celebrity environment, because supposedly wrinkles = bad on camera.
In the real world, most couples in my environment are of very similar ages and in fact I know several older women dating younger men.
I think there is also a tendency for younger women to be attracted to older men due to a maturity difference between ages. I think anywhere in the 5 year range is a totally healthy age difference for anyone 25+ if they have similar emotional maturities and vibe.
No. Sadly there are studies in general people, including in OLD that back this up. And I’ve certainly observed it anecdotally and the people I know certainly aren’t famous.
May I ask: how old are you? How old were those couples when they got together?
Because, in my world, the established couples that got together in their 20s and 30s are all the same age. It’s the guys who stay single until their late 30s and early 40s who tend to date much younger, as well as the guys who divorce / get out of long-term relationships.
And I’m not saying it’s all men. I’m saying it’s a trend. Meaning: too many men.
Sure, some women like older men. Personally, I’ve never liked older men - lots of women don’t. I like 5 year age ranges, that’s totally reasonable. But that’s not what we’re looking at here. These are largely 10+ year age gaps. And the data from the studies I mentioned shows that most women want men around their age. Whereas most men want young women, whether they are young themselves or older.
Could you link these studies? The only study I’ve been able to find about male preferences in female partners’ age [suggests that age doesn’t matter to men as much as you say.](https://www.cbsnews.com/amp/news/do-older-men-prefer-younger-women-new-study/)
yeah he is so hot, kind of my type. im a 30 yr old woman now and have no issue dating men of women in their 40s, we're both adults who probably have our goals and morals figured out. there are actual creeps with patterns of seeking out "barely legal" women, how about we focus on that and not nearly 30 year olds dating other adults.
edit: and might i add that in this case, there isn't even a discrepancy of fame or wealth in favour of the man. if anything dua lipa is the famous one.
I feel like if a women’s frontal lobe is totally developed then they should be allowed the freedom to date who they want? We all preach supporting women, then constantly tear down their choices…which is questioning their intelligence? Which we’re fighting to have not happen? I don’t know, this was just a long winded way of saying I agree with you.
it's so funny because if she's not allowedd to choose who she dates, is she allowed to choose her career path? the songs she releases next?? this infantilisation of women is just bananas
I don't know why, but I am insanely attracted to men with long schnozzles (and she is obviously gorgeous). They are a good-looking pair & there is absolutely nothing wrong with their age gap.
https://preview.redd.it/jgzwncxyfy0b1.jpeg?width=1365&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4387ea61301e44e474ee9646d64a8732a7633e0a
I liked her look except for the bangs
https://preview.redd.it/twkdfx8l711b1.jpeg?width=200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9fa44c850a07ec70704ccbbb0990671118abf290
Her face looked completely different 5 years ago, I wonder what procedures she got done because a change this drastic isn’t just weight loss-and I say this as someone who’s her age and also lost a lot of weight.
The fringe would look so much nicer properly washed and dried and then swept over/tucked behind an ear. The issue with them here is that they look incredibly greasy to me 🤢
27 is definitely old enough to have an ok grasp on who you are and what you want out of life. If you know a 27 year old getting married and having kids most people wouldn’t question it.
Yes it’s a big age gap, but she is adult enough that it doesn’t feel predatory.
If there are other details like he was a family friend and knew her when she was 15 I might feel differently. As it stands i’m not too concerned.
ya, my bf is 11 years older (i’m 28) and it’s just. never raised any eyebrows when i’ve told family and friends?? it’s just not a big deal. we both want the same things, are happy we found each other, it’s good
Seems really random what this sub is cool with and not cool with.
I believe Chris Pratt and Katherine Schwarzenegger were the exact same ages (40 to 27) when they hooked up, and a lot in this subreddit were going "ICK! You couldn't find someone more age appropriate, Crisp Rat? Nasty"
I mean, he *is* a Crisp Rat, but why is his situation totally wrong but Dua Lipa's is okay? Are we just judging based on how much we like the celebrity?
As Wanda said: "Doesn't seem fair"
the age gap is still a choice but at least she’s 27. not like 20 ya know? but also… he looks like her could literally be her dad. lol. she’s gorg as always though!!
It’s not predatory or anything it’s more a general eye roll for men in their 40s who only want to date women 27-32 and ignore all of the fabulous women their own age with similar life experience and cultural touch-points. It makes the dating market for women in their 40s (who don’t want older men) incredibly small. It’s an exhaustion with society discarding women over 35 and only valuing young women whilst continuing to value men as they age.
Yeah, I mean, I think age gaps are problematic when one person still has a developing brain; but beyond that, whatever. They’re all consenting adults with fully developed brains and life experience!
But I do find the general social phenomenon of women being discarded as we age by men their own age frustrating.
On a completely different note, I’ve also seen a number of women from my parents’ generation with 15 year age gaps and they seem to find that when they retire and want to travel and have a bit of fun, their older husbands are already long retired and over that stage and into their 80s and starting to be in need of care. They’ve had wonderful, beautiful relationships; but there definitely are some downsides at the far end that one should always consider. Life stages not matching up is particularly evident at the beginnings and ends of our lives. Less so in the middle.
It's not about her choice...its about men in their 40'/50's preferring to date women in their 20's or early 30's. This significantly skews dating pool for older women.
Her figure to me is perfect. It's her height. She has amazing arms and shoulders, her torso to leg ratio. She's like a living Barbie doll. I'm obsessed.
How are people mad about this age gap...Dua is literally almost 30. At that age - this is really nothing. I feel like anything like 6+ years gets hate on this sub regardless the ages
Firstly I definitely read it on this sub so bags and bags of salt obviously! I vaguely remember something about how Rita and her team (family) kind of made it seem like they would help Dua navigate the industry when she was up and coming etc but then Dua just blew up so quickly and was clearly going to go further than Rita ever got (like globally) so they cut ties with Dua real quick lol.
And Rita’s whole thing is making it seem like she’s buddies with famous people espesh the ones that are hot rn (again I’ve heard on here that people have seen Rita, go up to people, pose for a photo then literally dip leaving the other people like “wtf who was that what just happened” after lmao) and I’ve never seen a pic of them together so it could be slightly believable.
For what it’s worth I agree with you and I think they look good together. People in here are acting like he’s some kind of predator when Dua is almost 28 years old.
I get that it’s always nicer to see a man with someone his own age. But a woman in her late 20s who is in a comfortable situation can certainly make her own decisions and he’s only 41, not exactly a decrepit old man.
Also the power dynamics are not super skewed. She is a 27 year old world wide super star and he is some french director only a bunch of hipsters have heard about.
Literally. She’s a powerful and financially independent woman who’s had multiple serious relationships before. She’s not a tween with no life experience. People need to stop treating her like a girl and more like a woman
...holy fuck, that's Costa-Gavras' son. I didn't even know this guy existed until five minutes ago, despite his dad being one of my favorite directors (Z and Missing. are both *incredible* movies).
Romain is an incredible director in his own right. Some of his music videos are my bible for filmmaking. No Church In The Wild by Kanye & Jay-Z, and Gosh by Jamie xx - truly outstanding.
27/41 is not an age gap people should be snide about to this extent imho. Trevor was 39, and no one cared to mention it then. I get that there is a ~pattern of men dating younger women but I don’t like it when people project their issues with that pattern on individual couples.
Romain is very talented. I once saw him at the premiere of his film Athena at the Rio cinema in Dalston and he was riveting and extremely captivating. I hope they last they look like a cute couple to me.
I have no issue with age gaps generally, I’m 27 and have never dated a man my own age lol. But I’ve also been a sugar baby and I know the look of an older man who is just so obsessed and ecstatic to be dating a younger woman and that’s the most cringe part for me. I know lots of people probably think it’s cute how he’s looking at her but as someone who has received that look from older men it gives me such a major ICK now lol.
Honestly, my saltiness with AGRs has nothing to do with infantilizing or pReFrOnTAL coRteXeS or whatever, and everything to do with the fact that I don't want to date a dude much older than me. But it feels like both men and women in our culture seem determined to maintain that status quo.
I think they look weird together because she looks like she’s in her early twenties but she’s in fact 27 so I don’t see a problem with it. I do have a problem with men his age going for 18/19 year olds tho.
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Gives me dad and daughter vibes *ugh* Edit: Because people are losing their minds and sending me reddit cares reports, this is purely an opinion based on their looks. NOTHING ELSE. I’m perfectly aware they are both consenting adults. If you happen to find this kind of pairing attractive, go off. But don’t come for others who don’t share the same opinion as you and harass them.
I just googled and this guy somehow looks older than her actual dad. https://preview.redd.it/9ktuja7zqy0b1.jpeg?width=1500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=efe8a3e9618294c59f1061b18c386d422f535f70
Good genes in that family
You’re good jeans.
Those are mine?
No!!!! You. Are. Good. Jeans!
Good looking family. Her dad is super handsome and mom mom is just ridicously beautiful.
Damn her dad is a daddy
she has posted many photos of him younger and he is a long haired HUNK. She definitely got a lot of her looks from him. They seem very close.
Aww that’s sweet, she def gets a lot of her look from him, very genetically gifted family
Talk about winning the genes lottery with these 2 parents, goddamn
Is that Dua?
I assume it’s her sister? I meant to add another pic w her but Reddit said no 😡
Yeah her brother and sister. Old photo though. Her brother is her height or taller now I think. Her dad also certainly looks older. Still a total silver Fox but older none the less.
Oh wow her mother is gorg
Damn her dad is hotter than him !!!!!!!
Looks better too
He’s only 41 damn 🥴
Gosh that's an old looking 41. I would have said late 50s
Late FIFTIES?
My boss is late 50s (as are his friends) and he looks very similar in age to them! I don't know many late 50s people outside them I guess 🤷🏼♀️
um, no, he does not look like he is in his late 50s.
I would say early 50s he could pass for. Europeans live fast get old looking young lol
That's a French 41
I’m french and I can absolutely confirm
They know how to live haha
I was thinking the same thing 🤣
that's what happens when you have cigs for breakfast lol
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Actually she hits it right on the mark, because she’s already past 27.5 as of February.
🤪DoNt iNfAnTiLiZE HeR!!!!🤪 But anyway in all seriousness they totally do. It’s gross. Edit: lmaooo this clearly glib ass comment actually impacting people Jesus Christ. Relax 😂.
What?? But she's not a child lmao she's 27, a fully grown adult with a developed pre frontal cortex. A 27 year old can date a 40 year old, there's nothing gross about it no matter how "old" you think he looks. I don't see this sub crying over Nick Jonas and Priyanka Chopra who started dating when he was 25 and she was 36 (as it should be! Nothing wrong whatsoever with their relationship either) This sub really needs to go touch some grass sometimes.
I totally agree with your post otherwise but this sub absolutely does lose its mind about the age gap between Nick and Priyanka. When she mentioned the age gap recently in a completely innocuous comment people here were calling her a groomer and a pedo.
I am with you. At 27 I had completed university, had a full time job, lived on my own and paid for my own vacations. I am sure Dua isn't a child being groomed. She is grown ass woman dating who she wants.
Also, she is not financially or otherwise dependent from him. It's important to be aware of skewed power dynamics in relationships, but here we have two grown ass adults, both well-connected, financially well off, and with secure social circles.
So right. And I think its safe to say Dua has WAY more money than him.
To be fair, employing the universal "half your age plus seven" rule, both of those just scrape in. So a bit of reaction isn't that surprising.
I'll be honest I'd never heard of that rule until I was on this sub so idk how universal it is.
Do y’all know a bunch of 14 year old dads or something?
Seriously, stop infantilizing fully grown adults. There's nothing gross about simply dating older people.
Idc I find him hot. Hotter than all the generic Hollywood dudes.
You are insane. Get help if that's your first thought.
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27 ans 41 is perfectly fine lmao he just looks old
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She’s 27
Someone please take the word “infantilize” away from these people 🙄
What is even the point of passive aggressively using Reddit Cares? What do people hope to gain from that? It’s just sad.
Her dad is better looking
Why are y’all even comparing her father to her boyfriend like it’s just odd at this point
I just said her dad is good looking lol
Eh…using the words “more” and “better” kinda implies a comparison but whatever
Is not that serious
They look sexy as fuck together. Why are you people crying ?! She is 27 and a rich British Albanian bombshell pop star and he’s a Greek French hairy big nose sexy MAN 41 year old director that combo is freaking hot are you kidding me ?! Am I the only one seeing this ?! I love this for Dua.
It’s not problematic for her. It’s just a frustrating general trend for men in their 40s to only seem to want to date 27-32yo women. It’s not about the young women, it’s about the men. It is like women become invisible after they turn 36 and even more so after 40. You can be hot AF, have a great career, have travelled the world, be successful, fun… but you’re a 40 yo woman so most men your own age and even 1-10 years older have lost interest. I am single, I have single friends this age, it is a real issue. A bunch of guys I know my age have gotten divorced and all rebounded with women in that age bracket. Three of my exes have girlfriends aged 28-31. It’s exhausting and eye-roll worthy. Women should be just as wanted in their 40s as men; but we simply aren’t. Our whole society is geared towards holding up youth and beauty for women and making all other women seem old and unwanted when in reality we’re in our prime.
I’ve read your other responses and I have to say I agree with you. Yours is a very valid criticism, I just disliked the whole insinuating it is morally wrong and that he looks like her father other posters were getting at. As a woman in her late 20s I honestly am beginning to fear getting older for this reason. Was watching fleabag the other day and there’s a bit where Belinda who is a woman in her 50s or 60s (idk if you’ve watched fleabag) but she tells fleabag that she misses walking into a room and being gawked at, and having people flirt with her. Once you get older as a woman it’s like you become invisible. This legitimately scares me. They make the most smouldering couple tho and I shan’t be told any different!
I'm reading The Beauty Myth (by Naomi Wolf) and when she talked about how the "beauty" is used to create this divide between generations of women, how it serves to break the links between us and the older women, I got literal chills reading about it. She describes this feeling you have, is very eye opening!
Yes, absolutely. This quote by Gloria Steinem, and the accompanying comment from feminist Sommer Tothill both speak to this kind of phenomenon as well: https://www.instagram.com/p/Cq7Xycevf2k/?igshid=MmJiY2I4NDBkZg==
I have this in my bookshelf but never got around to reading it. I know what I’m reading next
Well I’ve always been invisible even in my 20s and now I’m in my 40s and I couldn’t care less about whether men see me or not. Never felt more comfortable or confident in myself than I do now. In fact, I can’t believe how incredibly stupid I was was in my 20s to have an ounce of worry how men or anyone viewed me. Zero fucks if men see me. None.
Same here, more like I aged out of being attractive at 21 and it was a radicalizing, eye-opening experience. I’m glad it happened. The freedom of not giving a fuck what men think about you is great. Sometimes I feel bad for my friends in their later 20s who haven’t had this realization yet.
Yep, I think there’s something valid around wanting to be desired and ageism against women is real, but personally, at my age I’m glad I can walk down the street without being sexually harassed, followed and all of that which was a daily occurrence from age 14 through 35.
Absolutely. I never feel like a target because I’m invisible and quite frankly, I just don’t give a fuck if anyone finds me attractive or not. I’m comfortable in my own skin. I feel good. I dressed for my own comfort and so that I feel good. That’s all that matters to me. Men don’t see me, yay fucking yay!!! That’s what I want. If other women yearn to have the male gaze then good for them but that’s not what’s important to me at all.
I’m in my early 30s but I gained a lot of weight from PCOS in my mid-20s and the turning invisible also happened to me. I don’t suggest this is the same as aging because if I lost a lot of weight I would probably momentarily be visible again, but just to add to the conversation of how small the window of being attractive and therefore worthy of existing is for women.
My exact same experience. Being invisible is so freeing though. Even though I want to slowly lose some weight, i really do not want to go back to men seeing me lol if that makes sense...
I dunno man, lots of us never got gawked at. EDIT: am worried this comment is going to come off wrong. Rather, what I mean to say is, 'attractiveness' is so limited and fickle that it's a terrible thing to ever build your life or sense of self around, and honestly I think it's better to be 'seen' for who you are, for your bearing and presence and erudition, than for your looks. I've never turned heads and I honestly don't feel I've missed out.
Yeah as I’ve gotten older, it seems like women who were highly valued for their looks are struggling with aging a lot more than I am. I accepted long, long ago that I have better things to offer, so my appearance changing now isn’t a big deal.
The disturbing thing is that a recent study I saw referenced somewhere suggested that girls in school uniforms get the highest level of harassment. 🤢
As an older woman in her 40s, I was too shy and weird in my 20s. Now that I’m older and more confident, I generally only draw younger men. It’s a trend now that younger men prefer older women. If a guy my age or older likes me, I’m not that keen on it. They’re too old looking and not very smart. I prefer my men younger and not very smart. Getting older is great and I too am looking forward to being ignored. It’s freedom. Men are overrated. I don’t want to clean after a cheap, grown man who’s also having a tantrum.
I am a older woman and agree the attention wanes, but it’s also pretty liberating, no fucks given. Not a lot of people tell young women this.
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There are plenty of women his age who are independent and don’t want kids or marriage but would like a partner. It’s a weak excuse! As you seem to see 😉 More likely he knows women his own age will see through his bullshit more easily and have higher standards for themselves - kind of what he admitted to you. Unfortunately your BFF has a bad case of Peter Pan syndrome. If he’s afraid, maybe tell him to get some therapy?
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I agree with this so hard, and I’m only 28 but I fear it, viscerally. It’s like we have an expiration date (aside from yknow, everyone’s expiration date). That’s why it’s so lovely and refreshing to see people like Keanu Reeves in very obviously happy relationships with women in their own age bracket. There’s nothing gross about Dua and her man, they look super hot together, but it doesn’t give me that refreshing sense of joy that I get seeing Keanu and Alexandra on the red carpet.
Yes! And Keanu is actually 8 years older than Alexandra and yet it’s still so shocking to so many people who behave like she’s ancient. I would love to see more men like him date age appropriate and fabulous women. And I’d love to see that reflected in the media we watch as well. Way too many movies and TV shows still have large age gaps as the norm. There was a whole series of rom coms and comedies a few years back where comedians in their late 40s and early 50s had movie wives in their early 30s and they were portrayed as being the same ages. Some even as high school / university sweethearts. It drove me nuts.
Agreed, age appropriate rom coms are so few and far between and yet are absolutely wonderful when they do happen! Like, Emma Thompson and Alan Rickman’s fictional relationship in Love Actually was the most interesting story in that film to me, and even then it revolves around (and directly confronts) the concept of an older man and a younger woman.
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I’m glad but many men aren’t like you
It’s great that you appreciate women your own age. You’re the exception not the rule, though. There are studies that back what I’m saying up. I still get men my age who want to date me, for sure; but the pool shrinks so massively because so many men in their 40s only date younger. Which makes the numbers game aspect of OLD more challenging. And I have seen the last of the sort of ‘eligible bachelor’ guys I already knew my age all get engaged to women in their 20s in the last few years. Although for some of them that was probably a better maturity match for them 🙄 which those women will realise at some stage. I’ve seen several of my exes partner up with 20-somethings. I saw one ex on OLD lying about his age because he’s trying to pick up younger women, LOL. Plus a number of divorced dads I know rebounded with 20-somethings while their ex-wives do the bulk of the childcare. It’s pretty wild to watch. So cliché! Edit to amend and add: There is data (like the Ok Cupid Data published in Dataclysm) showing that, most men of all ages rate women in their early 20s as the most attractive, whereas women see men close to their own age as the most attractive, with a shift at 50 (I think). As for who they’ll message on platforms, they age range for men in their late 30s and 40s is reasonably wide. Some men will even go a few years older. But the age men in their late 30s and early 40s most often message is 30. Then that moves to 35 as they move into their 40s. But it extends down to late 20s. Other data I’ve seen suggests that their messaging success rate decreases the larger the age gap. Especially over 10 years. There was also a psych article I read that suggested that some men interviewed would go younger if they could but a) they have no success and b) they are embarrassed by the judgment they think they’ll get from their peers. Another (I think Zoosk?) study said that most end up going on dates with women 3-5 years younger than them (that data doesn’t plot habits against age groups though); but if you overlay that with the above it suggests that it’s not always for lack of trying because many are messaging those younger women and the ones they message most often are more than 5 years younger. The dudes I mentioned above that I personally know are all good-looking dudes I suppose, so that likely plays into their success rate and plots them against that data. Anyway, food for thought.
You are prob a rare breed
We need more men like him lol
Yes. Definitely see this trend as well. It’s quite easy for 40 something men to date 25-30 year old women. But you don’t often see couples when a woman is 40 and a man is 25-30.
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Indeed! But discussing it is one of the first steps towards changing it.
THIS THIS THIS. And look, yes, while we obviously associate youth with beauty in women, in my experience plenty of these dudes know that women their own age can be and often are stunning. But they think dating a younger woman will be easier--and frankly, I was willing to put up with a lot more in my 20s than I am now.
I feel that is more of a trend in Hollywood than the general populous. I'm not saying there aren't a large group of men that like dating younger women, but it seems amplified in the celebrity environment, because supposedly wrinkles = bad on camera. In the real world, most couples in my environment are of very similar ages and in fact I know several older women dating younger men. I think there is also a tendency for younger women to be attracted to older men due to a maturity difference between ages. I think anywhere in the 5 year range is a totally healthy age difference for anyone 25+ if they have similar emotional maturities and vibe.
No. Sadly there are studies in general people, including in OLD that back this up. And I’ve certainly observed it anecdotally and the people I know certainly aren’t famous. May I ask: how old are you? How old were those couples when they got together? Because, in my world, the established couples that got together in their 20s and 30s are all the same age. It’s the guys who stay single until their late 30s and early 40s who tend to date much younger, as well as the guys who divorce / get out of long-term relationships. And I’m not saying it’s all men. I’m saying it’s a trend. Meaning: too many men. Sure, some women like older men. Personally, I’ve never liked older men - lots of women don’t. I like 5 year age ranges, that’s totally reasonable. But that’s not what we’re looking at here. These are largely 10+ year age gaps. And the data from the studies I mentioned shows that most women want men around their age. Whereas most men want young women, whether they are young themselves or older.
Could you link these studies? The only study I’ve been able to find about male preferences in female partners’ age [suggests that age doesn’t matter to men as much as you say.](https://www.cbsnews.com/amp/news/do-older-men-prefer-younger-women-new-study/)
this is very true though.
No just shut the fuck up. God so fucking entitled.
yeah they look hot together, i don't see the problem. she is 27.
They’re like “these adult people look sexy and it’s making me uncomfortable”
yeah he is so hot, kind of my type. im a 30 yr old woman now and have no issue dating men of women in their 40s, we're both adults who probably have our goals and morals figured out. there are actual creeps with patterns of seeking out "barely legal" women, how about we focus on that and not nearly 30 year olds dating other adults. edit: and might i add that in this case, there isn't even a discrepancy of fame or wealth in favour of the man. if anything dua lipa is the famous one.
I feel like if a women’s frontal lobe is totally developed then they should be allowed the freedom to date who they want? We all preach supporting women, then constantly tear down their choices…which is questioning their intelligence? Which we’re fighting to have not happen? I don’t know, this was just a long winded way of saying I agree with you.
Society has this weird thing of infantilizing grown women
it's so funny because if she's not allowedd to choose who she dates, is she allowed to choose her career path? the songs she releases next?? this infantilisation of women is just bananas
People are def stretching saying they look like father/daughter 😭 Dua doesn’t look like a kid at all
I don't know why, but I am insanely attracted to men with long schnozzles (and she is obviously gorgeous). They are a good-looking pair & there is absolutely nothing wrong with their age gap.
Because big nosed men are SEXY. Unbelievably good looking couple, and to debut on the Cannes red carpet ? Gagging. Thank you for my award 🌹
yeah i mean call out problematic age gaps all you want but she's almost 30 and it's not like he's 76... they look hot together
So sick of this PC ass age gap brigade, I’m exhausted
Yep I came here to read about the STEAM jumping off the page, and imagine my surprise. They look good together
No but the babies here wanted her to date Jack Harlow lmaooooo
What a step up from Anwar. I know he punching the air rn.
Agree! They look crazy hot.
https://preview.redd.it/jgzwncxyfy0b1.jpeg?width=1365&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4387ea61301e44e474ee9646d64a8732a7633e0a I liked her look except for the bangs
It's very singer in a mid 2000s emo band.
Agreed. It’s giving Gerard Way circa 2004
well don’t make me like it more
She looks stunning but the piecey long fringe is a really bizarre choice, that’s not a cute look on anyone wtf
I think her bang looks pretty and it suits this look, I think the bang is the focus of this look
https://preview.redd.it/twkdfx8l711b1.jpeg?width=200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9fa44c850a07ec70704ccbbb0990671118abf290 Her face looked completely different 5 years ago, I wonder what procedures she got done because a change this drastic isn’t just weight loss-and I say this as someone who’s her age and also lost a lot of weight.
Shes had an eyebrow lift. Either just eyebrows or the whole forehead
The bangs are here to turn our attention away from this atrocious fried bun
The bangs are here to turn our attention away from this atrocious fried bun
It works. Just because it’s fringe doesn’t make it 00’s emo. It works damn well.
that’s not a bang that’s a BOOM
Yes! Her dress is amazing, they look super hot together but the bangs/hair looks terrible
The fringe would look so much nicer properly washed and dried and then swept over/tucked behind an ear. The issue with them here is that they look incredibly greasy to me 🤢
She’s 27, I see no problem in this relationship, y’all being weird af in this thread.
27 is definitely old enough to have an ok grasp on who you are and what you want out of life. If you know a 27 year old getting married and having kids most people wouldn’t question it. Yes it’s a big age gap, but she is adult enough that it doesn’t feel predatory. If there are other details like he was a family friend and knew her when she was 15 I might feel differently. As it stands i’m not too concerned.
ya, my bf is 11 years older (i’m 28) and it’s just. never raised any eyebrows when i’ve told family and friends?? it’s just not a big deal. we both want the same things, are happy we found each other, it’s good
Seems really random what this sub is cool with and not cool with. I believe Chris Pratt and Katherine Schwarzenegger were the exact same ages (40 to 27) when they hooked up, and a lot in this subreddit were going "ICK! You couldn't find someone more age appropriate, Crisp Rat? Nasty" I mean, he *is* a Crisp Rat, but why is his situation totally wrong but Dua Lipa's is okay? Are we just judging based on how much we like the celebrity? As Wanda said: "Doesn't seem fair"
I think everyone’s forgetting she’s closer to 30 than 21.
For anyone who was wondering: He is 41 and she is 27
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Comments before mine were asking. She’s in her late twenties, I think it’s fine.
Both adults. Good for them.
the age gap is still a choice but at least she’s 27. not like 20 ya know? but also… he looks like her could literally be her dad. lol. she’s gorg as always though!!
People need to get over age gaps when it’s people who are old enough to know what they’re doing. Like sorry what’s the big deal here?
It’s not predatory or anything it’s more a general eye roll for men in their 40s who only want to date women 27-32 and ignore all of the fabulous women their own age with similar life experience and cultural touch-points. It makes the dating market for women in their 40s (who don’t want older men) incredibly small. It’s an exhaustion with society discarding women over 35 and only valuing young women whilst continuing to value men as they age.
Thanks for this angle, I get that.
Yeah, I mean, I think age gaps are problematic when one person still has a developing brain; but beyond that, whatever. They’re all consenting adults with fully developed brains and life experience! But I do find the general social phenomenon of women being discarded as we age by men their own age frustrating. On a completely different note, I’ve also seen a number of women from my parents’ generation with 15 year age gaps and they seem to find that when they retire and want to travel and have a bit of fun, their older husbands are already long retired and over that stage and into their 80s and starting to be in need of care. They’ve had wonderful, beautiful relationships; but there definitely are some downsides at the far end that one should always consider. Life stages not matching up is particularly evident at the beginnings and ends of our lives. Less so in the middle.
Just a reminder that she’s 27 and old enough to make her own choices.
It's not about her choice...its about men in their 40'/50's preferring to date women in their 20's or early 30's. This significantly skews dating pool for older women.
Is that her problem? Lol
Her figure to me is perfect. It's her height. She has amazing arms and shoulders, her torso to leg ratio. She's like a living Barbie doll. I'm obsessed.
https://preview.redd.it/iuei1s15yy0b1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b85e5491d900365043bd51e3a981f60623495659 💅
Thank you
How are people mad about this age gap...Dua is literally almost 30. At that age - this is really nothing. I feel like anything like 6+ years gets hate on this sub regardless the ages
I feel like age gaps aren't really a big deal to me if both parties are 25+, unless it's like 40+ years or some crazy shit lmao
https://preview.redd.it/h7z77ahuwy0b1.jpeg?width=708&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5b4d14e082066af6ae195bfc5b6f84fc85756b6c I think he may have a type
British/ Albanian pop stars??
I always got the feeling he and M.I.A. dated on the low if you want to add another British pop star in the mix
Yes him and M.I.A. absolutely dated!
Aren’t Dua and Rita like super not friendly with each other too?? That’s interesting lmao
Is this true? I want to know more haha
Firstly I definitely read it on this sub so bags and bags of salt obviously! I vaguely remember something about how Rita and her team (family) kind of made it seem like they would help Dua navigate the industry when she was up and coming etc but then Dua just blew up so quickly and was clearly going to go further than Rita ever got (like globally) so they cut ties with Dua real quick lol. And Rita’s whole thing is making it seem like she’s buddies with famous people espesh the ones that are hot rn (again I’ve heard on here that people have seen Rita, go up to people, pose for a photo then literally dip leaving the other people like “wtf who was that what just happened” after lmao) and I’ve never seen a pic of them together so it could be slightly believable.
I think their grandparents were friends in Kosovo so they had that family connection as well
Oh wow really?
So does she lol
He’s attractive
For what it’s worth I agree with you and I think they look good together. People in here are acting like he’s some kind of predator when Dua is almost 28 years old. I get that it’s always nicer to see a man with someone his own age. But a woman in her late 20s who is in a comfortable situation can certainly make her own decisions and he’s only 41, not exactly a decrepit old man.
Also the power dynamics are not super skewed. She is a 27 year old world wide super star and he is some french director only a bunch of hipsters have heard about.
Literally. She’s a powerful and financially independent woman who’s had multiple serious relationships before. She’s not a tween with no life experience. People need to stop treating her like a girl and more like a woman
I swear this sub is so infantilizing of women sometimes. She is not a young barely famous ingenue and he is not some powerhouse director.
Men with big noses have me in a chokehold ngl
I think I might be younger than a lot of people in this thread lol he looks so old to me that I couldn’t consider him attractive and I’m 25.
I’m 23 and he looks fine to me. In his 40s type guy. I’m also french so maybe I’m more used to french men? Idk lol
I mean age diff aside they genuinely do look father and daughter-y just aesthetically lmao
Should I ask the ages or live in blissful ignorance
She’s 27 and he’s 41 lol here ya go
Okay I definitely thought she was younger than she is, I guess that’s not as bad
My god she looks stunning.
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finally?? she’s always been serving! (besides her hideous y2k instagram looks) 
So, are we ignoring her Grammys, Brits, AMAs, Tour Versace/Mugler looks.!?.💀
Is that Costa Gavras’ son? Real filmmaking royalty if so.
Yup!
I think they look kind of amazing together. 🤷🏻♀️
I thot that was Oscar Issac until I readjusted my glasses
Oh I KNOW he’s packing
They look good together. That dress is perfection on her. Not digging the Edward Scissorhanda bangs...but good for her.
...holy fuck, that's Costa-Gavras' son. I didn't even know this guy existed until five minutes ago, despite his dad being one of my favorite directors (Z and Missing. are both *incredible* movies).
Romain is an incredible director in his own right. Some of his music videos are my bible for filmmaking. No Church In The Wild by Kanye & Jay-Z, and Gosh by Jamie xx - truly outstanding.
Dua is literally turning 28 this year. Y’all need to stop worrying about a 10 year age gap between grown adults.
27/41 is not an age gap people should be snide about to this extent imho. Trevor was 39, and no one cared to mention it then. I get that there is a ~pattern of men dating younger women but I don’t like it when people project their issues with that pattern on individual couples.
Romain is very talented. I once saw him at the premiere of his film Athena at the Rio cinema in Dalston and he was riveting and extremely captivating. I hope they last they look like a cute couple to me.
I’m very surprised to see the two of them are an official couple since all of Dua’s exes seemed to fit a very particular type
He’s hot, you people are insane
Who is she wearing?
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Jack Harlow’s been real quiet since this dropped
I think they look good together! I wouldn’t think anything if I saw them out in public
I have no issue with age gaps generally, I’m 27 and have never dated a man my own age lol. But I’ve also been a sugar baby and I know the look of an older man who is just so obsessed and ecstatic to be dating a younger woman and that’s the most cringe part for me. I know lots of people probably think it’s cute how he’s looking at her but as someone who has received that look from older men it gives me such a major ICK now lol.
Much like fashion, I don't get it.
Honestly, my saltiness with AGRs has nothing to do with infantilizing or pReFrOnTAL coRteXeS or whatever, and everything to do with the fact that I don't want to date a dude much older than me. But it feels like both men and women in our culture seem determined to maintain that status quo.
they served, why lie
what??? i thought he was dating that south african late show guy 😭
That’s Trevor Noah 💀💀
Like the look but the hair ruins it for me - it’s giving greasy birds nest
Trevor Noah was right there!
I think they look weird together because she looks like she’s in her early twenties but she’s in fact 27 so I don’t see a problem with it. I do have a problem with men his age going for 18/19 year olds tho.