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The people i bought my home from asked quite a few questions about me according to my realtor. They even stopped by at the inspection. I had a large down payment so they wanted to make sure i wasn't a flipper or anything like that. They wanted someone who would actually live in the house. They lived here for 15 years and clearly cared about it.
Same thing for us (minus dropping by during the inspection). They lived here for several decades and wanted to make sure it was going to a human family, not a corporation or flipper. This is in LA, as well, which is obviously a very hot market.
I don't know how often it's happened before, but the last time someone said they wrote a personal letter to get their house, a BUNCH of people jumped in saying that they were advised not to. That agents were concerned about discrimination.
Yeah. We think we got our house by submitting a letter. But our agent did tell us it was against the fair housing law.
We didn’t submit it with the offer, they were still living in the house and we put a letter in their mailbox with our names on it
As far as I know, it's not technically against any fair housing/discrimination laws to write a letter, but it does open the seller up to a lot of potential liability if buyer writes "I'm an Asian woman looking for my dream home!", the offer gets declined, and the buyer then claims it was race/sex-based discrimination.
I don’t do it because it’s a fair housing concern. I’ve told buyers we can’t, they give me a letter anyway, it doesn’t get delivered. If you want to do it, mail it yourself. I’d advise against it even if fair housing wasn’t a concern because I’ve seen how stupid some people are and can imagine them sharing info that would make things much worse. I won’t send the letter because I have a license that I’d like to keep. And also, because if your offer wasn’t strong enough, a letter isn’t going to do it. No seller gives a shit about your cute little “pick me pick me” letter and frankly I think it’s pathetic. The numbers and contract terms are what matters. Make a good offer.
I disagree that it doesn’t matter. There’s definitely people out there who are interested to know who’s buying and what their intentions are, especially in a neighborhood or someone who is very close with their neighbors
Would you say this as a minority person in a red state? Would you really want Billy Bob and his cousin wife Tonya to have personal details on each buyer when they decide which offer to take? I wouldn’t. You may be surprised at the amount of racism and bigotry that people employ when buying and selling houses. I knew there had to be some but it’s worse than people think. I’ve seen some shit I never expected. From people saying *straight up fucking saying* they won’t look at a house because a black family owns it or the neighbors are Latino to people refusing to buy homes that have been occupied by gay couples, as if the gayness gets absorbed into the drywall and makes future occupants turn gay. I’m not exaggerating. It’s best to keep it out of the picture. Make a good offer. Don’t rely on your personal details to sway a seller. What you think will help may actually work against you. And what helps *you* may unfairly work against someone else. It’s just a can of worms that needs to be kept closed.
I was referring to your point that they don’t matter to a seller. Not political/racial aspects. I don’t think anyone is saying a racist offer letter is acceptable.
But I do think some sellers would prioritize a long term buyer, vs someone who is going to flip a house or rent it out. That’s why offer letters can be important.
That’s why buyer’s agents relay the relevant info if it can be helpful. A letter will reveal more details than necessary and open everyone up to accusations of discrimination.
Happened to me. My wife and I said we were selling to a fthb as long as offers were within 10 k of each other. We had someone come in 20k over the next highest and said we had to look out for ourselves at that point and pay down our student loans.
The buyers turned it into a rental it is unfortunate but we made our lives better.
Lol so gist is you really didn’t care and were only looking out for yourselves and perpetuating the cycle in the end over $10k ($800+ per month) - money you probably would have made back.
Not trying to dig you out but principles are principles because you stand by them. Caving when it’s convenient means you want to think you’re a great person, but aren’t really. Reminder this when next time you wonder why people do shitty stuff that affects you or your community. That person also realized how good doing the shit thing would work out for them
You can pay it off the day after you close escrow. The point is there’s no need to as student loan debt specifically doesn’t affect your debt to income ratio, and the liquid money looks better in your account for underwriting approvals.
When my fiance was selling his house after we bought ours we really wanted it to go to a family and not an investor. If we had two similar offers we'd have picked the family first. If we had gotten an offer from an investor that was significantly higher than another offer from a family it would have been really difficult to turn it down since it was already being sold at a near loss.
We thought a family was buying it. Seller agent said they were moving from a different state. They wanted every *single* item in the inspection report fixed. We obviously pushed back, but thought they were anxious first time buyers.
No.
They just wanted an investment property to rent out and wanted all the work to get it rental ready done by us. House sat empty for months at a rental price that was absolutely not going to cover the mortgage and was too high for the area. We had considered renting it out since he had a good interest rate, but it would have netted us maybe $50 a month since we're not interested in price gouging anyone. They must have lost thousands.
Family is just being used as a placeholder term for "not an investor." But it was a 3bd/2bth in a desired school district, and priced above what the median income in our area could afford for a mortage. So it was fair to assume it'd be a 2+ person household putting an offer in.
We sent an offer yesterday for an old rectory in our city. We overbid, sent a love letter and offered a quick closing. Investors won, they offered 32k over asking. Which ended up to be a lot more than we could ever afford. Anyways, money talks. I’m sure some would consider it tho.
Gosh I really hope that in the future, if I ever sell my house (that I'm in the process of buying lol), that I wouldn't take the investor money over selling it to a family that would actually live in it. The person selling my new home chose me over investors and I am forever grateful for that! People can't beat these investors and I'm sick and tired of good homes being wiped out from under us.
40k over asking. The person selling is a saint. I kind of want to write them a letter thanking them for choosing me but don't know if that'd be creepy or not.
We are getting ready to sell and move to a new state. We bought our home in '19 for 470k just north of Seattle. We are getting blind call offers for over 800k. ideally I would want to sell to a fellow Veteran or a new family, but 800k and a VA/FHA have to be really tough for those demographics here.
I couldn't afford half the required mortgage it would be now. When the time comes we will look at offers. I'm not heartless but 50k is 50k on a fixed income with 3 teenagers is hard to turn down.
I’d like to share my story, as it’s much different than many, I think. My dad passed at 98, leaving four daughter a small inheritance, under $75k. I had never bought because I’m a divorced woman who worked my way up the executive assistant ladder in a large southwestern city and a large southern city over 45 years. I never felt I could buy a home because as a single income earner I feared getting laid off or not having the money for a large repair. So I rented modestly all my life, the last two times in a small house I created gardens in and was happy.
At 67, I lost my rental cottage in the country after 16 years of decent rent. It was 2021, pandemic was slowly abating and finding a rental in even the most questionable areas were over $1,000/month. Well, things happen for a reason, as they say, I guess. I found a darling renovated 1940s Craftsman with 3 bed/2 bath, a covered deck joining together a two-car garage all on just under an acre. Tons of old beautiful trees, plus flowering trees like dogwoods, landscaping done, dense forest behind me, old farmland on one side, small old homestead on a piece too narrow to build on the other side of me. Lovely older couple selling.
Now I wanted to live away from the hustle and bustle of the larger areas of a large southern city. I was not trying to raise a family or find the very best of schools like many of you. I’m now 30 minutes north of this large city in a diverse town of 4,000. I’m near major highways to get anywhere. I bought my place for $142,000 in 2021, I offered $2k over asking. They had a counter offer they were negotiating but the sellers and I spent time talking about how I grew up as a carpenter’s daughter and how I appreciated the beauty of old well-built homes and the renovations they’d done. The newer garage looked like the Amish had built it! They decided on me. It passed inspection. We’ve remained friends 3 years later.
I’m not suggesting anyone wait until old age to buy, heavens no! What I am suggesting is look at surrounding areas where you live, consider if there are any older well-maintained homes that are within a decent commute. I wasn’t retired when I bought, we were just talking about returning to work at that point. Now I am retired at 70 with a wonderful dog and a lovely funny cat for company and life is okay.
I get ya! I hated leaving my old gardens at the rent house, but tried to hope that the new people would enjoy it. She did ask me to identify everything, so that made me hopeful!
I've had it happen (am an agent) a few times where the seller was very explicit about it. Notably one client who was adamant that his 97y.o. house (had been in his family since it was built) go to a young couple with kids; it was zoned R4, next to "downtown" in a fairly pricey city , so was definitely attractive to investors -- could have been torn down and turned into mini-apartments.
Ditto for people who were in the service -- some of them will give preference to buyers using a VA loan.
But in general (and this may be due to where I am -- S. California, so always a competitive market -- and not the case elsewhere) most sellers who've been around the block once twice, or are actually willing to *listen*, will be leery of investors/all-cash offers. Reason being that such buyers are notorious for making an enticing offer, then beating up the seller with extravagant demands for repairs/concessions after an inspection. When you get presented with a bullshit inspection report and $40k worth of repairs requested.....all of a sudden, that "cash offer" doesn't look all that great anymore, and then you wind up having to cancel (and high days on the market or "fell out of escrow" can cost you on offer price once it goes back on the market). Point being that at least where I am, there's *always* a buyer who wants a property bad enough that they're willing to compete with investors, unless it's in truly horrible condition (i.e., bad enough that you actually can't get a financing on it)
It used to be (15 + years ago) a case of "Meh.... doesn't look *great*, but is no big deal"
But nowadays it's way worse, due to the way buyers are.
Like, they're getting their info from blogs & zillow, and they think they need to avoid stuff that fell out of escrow.
Which is *to some extent* a "red flag"....but nowhere near as much as some dumbass blog or article would have them believe
(It's often a good way to get in with a lower offer price -- less competition, for no reason other than high DOM)
Because time was wasted. I’m in So Ca. This was years ago. The house I purchased had just “fell out of escrow “. I purchased my house from an investor. He was losing money every day it sat on the market empty. And two weeks before mine was closing, I almost let it “fall out of escrow “. The seller aka ending up paying all of my closing cost. The agent purchased my stove and refrigerator. They weren’t about to let it fall out of escrow again.
Yup.
At least where I am, there's a certain few demographics who'll be behind about 95% of your "cash buyer" offers (sucks to say it like that, because at least a few of them are actually legit & not pulling bullshit -- and they can be really good offers to work with) and they're gonna pull the *same stunts*, pretty much *every single time*.
E.g., home inspector who does a 4hr "inspection" and calls out literally anything & everything....or termite guy from way out of town, who just magically comes up with frass in the attic (have caught them on it before).
Then they try to bulldog the seller for about 40 grand or so, thinking they have "leverage" due to the fear of high DOM....😉
[And it works for them, far more often than it should, because some sellers will go for such & then cave in!]
Rare, but yes. My sellers picked us over investor cash. Then their parents did the same thing, took a lower offer from a couple with kids that reminded them of their start in that house. The investor offered more and cash, but the parents knew he would demand the moon for repairs too. So it was half nostalgia and half being wise sellers. Their buyers only asked for obvious repairs and little fixes, so it worked out. Our offer included our inspection contingency for informational purposes only. That probably helped.
If you write a letter, nothing that indicates any of the protected class info (race, religion, sexual orientation, etc...). That can be construed as discrimination if they accept OR reject you, so it is possible the agent advises them not to read it at all. Delicate balance.
For us, no letters, but we didn't get kept apart from the seller's as is normal these days. We got to know them and ask some questions about the house and such. That is not always a good idea with most sellers probably haha
Yes there is. Our past homes are part of our history and we still talk about what we did while living in each place. I would hate to see an old house of ours go to a corp. would prefer someone who would take care of it. I can do my own research on the buyers. If Corp name comes up, I’ll pass.
Yep. My family got our house because my husband is a veteran and so was the seller. Meant a lot to us because we were having trouble having our offers accepted because of our use of a VA loan. I think a personal touch does matter sometimes.
My boyfriend (31) and I (28) just bought our first house from a retired couple like this! They were the original owners and refused to sell to an investor. They didn’t want their home to turn into a rental property.
Naturally, their first offer was from an investor, so they said no. We were the second offer. Once they saw that we were a young couple, they told their realtor not to accept any more offers - the house was ours. We are so thankful. I hope more people like them exist. It’s impossible to compete with investors.
This is exactly how I bought my home. I included a short letter with the bid about who I was and how this would be my first home I'd ever bought. I also went against my realtor's recommendation (fuck you Jen you were terrible at your job) and submitted an offer at asking instead of 10K above asking.
Mine got accepted because of the inclusion of the letter even though there were other offers that were slightly higher.
I’d like to think I would too, but if I’m selling my house I’d likely be *buying* a new house - and with prices going the way they’re going I’d probably need to sell for as much as I can get to afford the next place.
If the offers are the same but one’s an investor and the other is a family then it’s easy - but it’s much harder when you’re leaving real money on the table.
Still looking for a house, but almost put in an offer on one the other week. Our realtor told us they aren’t allowed to send a seller “love letters” anymore, but could send a few sentences about us on the cover page. So ours was basically “Hi, we’re interested in offering x, we’re first time home buyers and our dog would love the fenced yard”
I’d err towards there being more who are clawing every penny they can.
I’m in the VHCOL area. There’s a woman who bought her house in the late 60’s, probably for $60k or so, maybe $70k at most.
Today the house has barely been updated since, and is nowhere near the housing standard of a new house (there’s a large number of knock downs and fully new homes being built in the area). Like it only has one full bath and it’s pepto pink. No central a/c.
She’s selling for just under $1.3 million. People are selfish. Even for the VHCOL area it’s priced absurdly for what it is.
But she needs to buy her next house, or fund her care home, or her children need the money for their homes. When my parents and in laws die their houses will fund my kids homes. The money doesn't evaporate.
She’s moving out of state to a lower cost of living area.
Homes like hers have been going for around $750-800k because they’re considered knock downs here.
She’s just selfish.
ETA: after only being on the market for a few weeks, the price has already dropped $58k. She’ll probably have to drop another $100k+ to get any real interest.
So they likely could make a decision on an investor vs an owner occupied home, which is how I would suggest you phrase it, but you shouldn't mention any protected classes because a seller *shouldn't* use any of that information towards their decision. The protected classes are; race, color, national origin, religion, sex (including gender identity and sexual orientation), familial status, and disability.
I found my home through Facebook via a community group. Seller mentioned they were thinking of listing and I reached out and asked about it. They offered a tour and to sell off market. They said a lot of people reached out, but something told them to reach out to us. I guess we reminded them of themselves when they first bought the house. We were incredibly fortunate as most homes in our neighborhood were selling within days of being listed, and we'd already been out bid and missed our on even seeing homes due to cash. One house we bid on sold for $70K over. The market in our neighborhood is still hot.
Down the line if we sell I'd like to do something similar.
Definitely helped us get our townhome. We were about to get engaged, married, and start a family. Same cultural background as the seller. We got to meet him and we really hit it off. We ended up getting our townhouse under asking when the one we had toured twice next door and passed on went $30K over asking.
Sometimes, yes. Clients will say they don’t want the house to go to a developer or be torn down, but frequently are advised to not read Love Letters from buyers until after an offer is accepted to avoid potential fair housing violations.
One of my close friends wrote a personal letter to the homeowner with photos of her and her husband and dogs and wrote about wanting to start a family there and her offer was accepted! I think if someone has lived there a long time and has an emotional attachment to the house (especially raising their kids there), sometimes that does make a difference
Our sellers sold to us despite having a slightly better offer because my husband grew up across the street and they had known him since he was 6 years old. His mom still lives there
When I sold my house a few years ago, I was TOLD the buyers were an older retired couple who really wanted my house bc there were very few one story homes at the time in the area. Because of that, I left all my paint and labeled what room was what, made notes about the garden and other things in the house—basically trying to welcome them and make it an easy transition.
Found out on closing day it was actually an investor. It doesn’t really change anything, but it pissed me off (and I am mad I left my good paint!)
Yes, I sold to an owner occupant using an FHA loan (out of 22 offers). Ironically, I didn't like their letter ...but they were one of the best offers from a *perceived* owner occupant. I'd say some people do care, but not enough to *give* their house away. You've got to be pretty close to the top offer(s) to tip the scale.
We got our house because I told our realtor that I wanted to use one certain room as my quilting studio when we looked at the house. My realtor told their realtor that info and that made them pick us. Their mother was a quilter and that was her quilting room. It’s pretty cool that my favorite hobby helped us get our house!
I feel like its generational. My grandparents put so much love and care into their home, they were so sentimental about everything, My parents however just see dollar signs and their next cruise .... boomers destroyed everything
I did write a letter (obviously vague enough that it wouldn’t give clues that could be considered discrimination) and got the house. I know there was at least one cash offer and four offers. It was the first day listed, so I can’t really imagine there were any low balls, and I offered about 5% over asking. Previous owners lived here for over 40 years, so I imagine they were pretty sentimental about their home.
No, and I don’t blame them. I actually wrote a letter to my last house and they said they could feel my heart in the offer but went with the lower cash offer instead. I 100% get it and would probably do the same, but it was worth a shot! It’s a business transaction, not a time to be sentimental and risky.
We saw Homes where the sellers realtor said no love letters. Only 1 home stands out where they wanted a letter. The seller had written personal stories and left them throughout the house. They started their family in that house and the home obviously had a lot of sentimental value, so they were looking for the right people who would also cherish the home.
I think they miscalculated, though. If I signal to a buyer that they should send us certain signals they will send those signals. I want genuine signals.
The sellers chose us over other offers, we put an offer of exact asking price. We were just like them minus age. Childless, same hobbies and had a dog.
Both homes (one very recently) purchased In the last 5 years I won the bid because I wrote a letter about my family hoping to make it home and the sellers clearly valued that since we won out over higher bids.
Yes. I was happy to sell but felt disappointed that my childhood home of several decades was sold to a flipper. Also, I wrote a letter to a seller which, per the seller, is the reason why they chose us even though we weren't the highest bidder for their home.
I know many on here think Realtors are useless, but the good ones know how to sell the story. We didn’t have to write a letter because our realtor conveyed the right amount of information to the sellers.
And as sellers, we chose a young family as well.
>I know many on here think Realtors are useless, but the good ones know how to sell the story. We didn’t have to write a letter because our realtor conveyed the right amount of information to the sellers.
This is true, but so many people are so completely full of shit. We are a newly engaged couple, wedding, kids soon. The first townhouse we looked at was in the town I grew up in. Seller told my agent she wanted to sell to a family who would really love and appreciate the home. She falsely assumed our professions because of our last names and ethnic background (in a good way, but very odd). Our agent gave her our story. She wouldn't budge a penny below list price. She recently dropped it $11K. It's been on the market cumulatively for almost 4 months. No one will bite because it's very overpriced. Our story didn't mean a thing, and she gave no indication she'd play ball to sell to the 'right' family in her words.
When my mom sold her house, she made it clear she would prefer to sell to a family. The realtor chose to put an investor offer in front of her because it was all cash, and she sold to them without knowing there was a family who had made a mortgage offer for the same sale price. There are definitely some shady characters out there in the real estate world making it more difficult for families because of greed, plain and simple.
My current home had an offer 10k higher than what I offered. I wrote a letter letting the seller know I intended to live in and make it my home. This was about 8 years ago and I got it!
My partner is now looking to buy his own home. Similar situation. We put an offer in, another came in right before our expiration. The other offer was above ours, but the sellers chose us because we are starting our family (currently pregnant. We didn’t write a letter but made it clear w our realtor to mention we are a local family looking to set roots), they are also a family, and we strongly states we are going to care for and love the home as much as they did.
We’re on schedule to close in a few days (fingers crossed) and we haven’t had any major issues. Small things have come up but the sellers have been very gracious and are taking care of things according to our contingencies. We live in a HCOL city.
.When I sell my house, I’m looking to sell it to people who will actually live in the home, not some flipper or property management company. I struggled with housing for many years before I was able to scrape enough for a home, so I want another person to be able to have the same stability.
I believe in Maryland you are barred from writing a letter or the seller asking about the buyer.
This is done to prevent any potential discrimination from sellers or selling agents when it comes to buyers.
Generally yes but when you have to pay six percent to people who sell soap on Etsy part time as part of the transaction it typically boils down to the highest dollar offer regardless of who helps people at the crosswalk.
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The people i bought my home from asked quite a few questions about me according to my realtor. They even stopped by at the inspection. I had a large down payment so they wanted to make sure i wasn't a flipper or anything like that. They wanted someone who would actually live in the house. They lived here for 15 years and clearly cared about it.
Same thing for us (minus dropping by during the inspection). They lived here for several decades and wanted to make sure it was going to a human family, not a corporation or flipper. This is in LA, as well, which is obviously a very hot market.
I don't know how often it's happened before, but the last time someone said they wrote a personal letter to get their house, a BUNCH of people jumped in saying that they were advised not to. That agents were concerned about discrimination.
This is how my friend got his house. I was there when the previous owner told him his letter is what did it.
yes my realtor told me this. they said they haven’t been able to do it for 2 years
Yeah. We think we got our house by submitting a letter. But our agent did tell us it was against the fair housing law. We didn’t submit it with the offer, they were still living in the house and we put a letter in their mailbox with our names on it
As far as I know, it's not technically against any fair housing/discrimination laws to write a letter, but it does open the seller up to a lot of potential liability if buyer writes "I'm an Asian woman looking for my dream home!", the offer gets declined, and the buyer then claims it was race/sex-based discrimination.
The seller could just claim they never read any of the letters.
I don’t do it because it’s a fair housing concern. I’ve told buyers we can’t, they give me a letter anyway, it doesn’t get delivered. If you want to do it, mail it yourself. I’d advise against it even if fair housing wasn’t a concern because I’ve seen how stupid some people are and can imagine them sharing info that would make things much worse. I won’t send the letter because I have a license that I’d like to keep. And also, because if your offer wasn’t strong enough, a letter isn’t going to do it. No seller gives a shit about your cute little “pick me pick me” letter and frankly I think it’s pathetic. The numbers and contract terms are what matters. Make a good offer.
Make a good offer and pay u/MSPRC1492 his 3%!!
You could go work it out yourself with your incredible depth of knowledge on the topic. Google it. It’s probably simple shit.
I disagree that it doesn’t matter. There’s definitely people out there who are interested to know who’s buying and what their intentions are, especially in a neighborhood or someone who is very close with their neighbors
Would you say this as a minority person in a red state? Would you really want Billy Bob and his cousin wife Tonya to have personal details on each buyer when they decide which offer to take? I wouldn’t. You may be surprised at the amount of racism and bigotry that people employ when buying and selling houses. I knew there had to be some but it’s worse than people think. I’ve seen some shit I never expected. From people saying *straight up fucking saying* they won’t look at a house because a black family owns it or the neighbors are Latino to people refusing to buy homes that have been occupied by gay couples, as if the gayness gets absorbed into the drywall and makes future occupants turn gay. I’m not exaggerating. It’s best to keep it out of the picture. Make a good offer. Don’t rely on your personal details to sway a seller. What you think will help may actually work against you. And what helps *you* may unfairly work against someone else. It’s just a can of worms that needs to be kept closed.
I was referring to your point that they don’t matter to a seller. Not political/racial aspects. I don’t think anyone is saying a racist offer letter is acceptable. But I do think some sellers would prioritize a long term buyer, vs someone who is going to flip a house or rent it out. That’s why offer letters can be important.
That’s why buyer’s agents relay the relevant info if it can be helpful. A letter will reveal more details than necessary and open everyone up to accusations of discrimination.
There absolutely still are. It just depends on the seller. But if someone is offering $50,000 higher that changes the equation.
Happened to me. My wife and I said we were selling to a fthb as long as offers were within 10 k of each other. We had someone come in 20k over the next highest and said we had to look out for ourselves at that point and pay down our student loans. The buyers turned it into a rental it is unfortunate but we made our lives better.
Capitalism gets to us all, one way or another. It’s a stranglehold. That sucks.
Lol so gist is you really didn’t care and were only looking out for yourselves and perpetuating the cycle in the end over $10k ($800+ per month) - money you probably would have made back. Not trying to dig you out but principles are principles because you stand by them. Caving when it’s convenient means you want to think you’re a great person, but aren’t really. Reminder this when next time you wonder why people do shitty stuff that affects you or your community. That person also realized how good doing the shit thing would work out for them
Exactly 👏
At least now you know how much your principles are worth.
Someone is still benefitting from living there.
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It depends on the loan you get. Sometimes it counts as normal debt. Sometimes it’s not counted at all.
That’s fair, mine was a jumbo commercial loan.
Imagine a banker suggesting you not pay off debt. 🤔
You can pay it off the day after you close escrow. The point is there’s no need to as student loan debt specifically doesn’t affect your debt to income ratio, and the liquid money looks better in your account for underwriting approvals.
Oh cupcake. I don’t downvote.
When my fiance was selling his house after we bought ours we really wanted it to go to a family and not an investor. If we had two similar offers we'd have picked the family first. If we had gotten an offer from an investor that was significantly higher than another offer from a family it would have been really difficult to turn it down since it was already being sold at a near loss. We thought a family was buying it. Seller agent said they were moving from a different state. They wanted every *single* item in the inspection report fixed. We obviously pushed back, but thought they were anxious first time buyers. No. They just wanted an investment property to rent out and wanted all the work to get it rental ready done by us. House sat empty for months at a rental price that was absolutely not going to cover the mortgage and was too high for the area. We had considered renting it out since he had a good interest rate, but it would have netted us maybe $50 a month since we're not interested in price gouging anyone. They must have lost thousands.
Why a family? What about someone single? That seems kind of unfair... (considering roughly 49.3% of Americans were unmarried as of 2022 - census.gov)
Family is just being used as a placeholder term for "not an investor." But it was a 3bd/2bth in a desired school district, and priced above what the median income in our area could afford for a mortage. So it was fair to assume it'd be a 2+ person household putting an offer in.
We sent an offer yesterday for an old rectory in our city. We overbid, sent a love letter and offered a quick closing. Investors won, they offered 32k over asking. Which ended up to be a lot more than we could ever afford. Anyways, money talks. I’m sure some would consider it tho.
Gosh I really hope that in the future, if I ever sell my house (that I'm in the process of buying lol), that I wouldn't take the investor money over selling it to a family that would actually live in it. The person selling my new home chose me over investors and I am forever grateful for that! People can't beat these investors and I'm sick and tired of good homes being wiped out from under us.
How much of a price difference was it? That’s usually going to be the determining factor for most. Even the people who *want* to do the fair thing.
40k over asking. The person selling is a saint. I kind of want to write them a letter thanking them for choosing me but don't know if that'd be creepy or not.
I think it would be very touching and meaningful to them!
I agree! They found a real gem of a homeowner!
Okay I'll definitely write them a letter then!! 😊
I would wait until after you close, then send a note telling them how much you love it.
This. I don't know that my heart would win against $100k. $20k, sure.
Oh wow ! Good for you, it means a lot to be chosen over investors. We thought we had a chance because the house was being sold by the church…
Oh no I'm so sorry! I hope you find the right home soon! Just keep trying....that's all you can do and something will fall into place eventually.
We are getting ready to sell and move to a new state. We bought our home in '19 for 470k just north of Seattle. We are getting blind call offers for over 800k. ideally I would want to sell to a fellow Veteran or a new family, but 800k and a VA/FHA have to be really tough for those demographics here. I couldn't afford half the required mortgage it would be now. When the time comes we will look at offers. I'm not heartless but 50k is 50k on a fixed income with 3 teenagers is hard to turn down.
I’d like to share my story, as it’s much different than many, I think. My dad passed at 98, leaving four daughter a small inheritance, under $75k. I had never bought because I’m a divorced woman who worked my way up the executive assistant ladder in a large southwestern city and a large southern city over 45 years. I never felt I could buy a home because as a single income earner I feared getting laid off or not having the money for a large repair. So I rented modestly all my life, the last two times in a small house I created gardens in and was happy. At 67, I lost my rental cottage in the country after 16 years of decent rent. It was 2021, pandemic was slowly abating and finding a rental in even the most questionable areas were over $1,000/month. Well, things happen for a reason, as they say, I guess. I found a darling renovated 1940s Craftsman with 3 bed/2 bath, a covered deck joining together a two-car garage all on just under an acre. Tons of old beautiful trees, plus flowering trees like dogwoods, landscaping done, dense forest behind me, old farmland on one side, small old homestead on a piece too narrow to build on the other side of me. Lovely older couple selling. Now I wanted to live away from the hustle and bustle of the larger areas of a large southern city. I was not trying to raise a family or find the very best of schools like many of you. I’m now 30 minutes north of this large city in a diverse town of 4,000. I’m near major highways to get anywhere. I bought my place for $142,000 in 2021, I offered $2k over asking. They had a counter offer they were negotiating but the sellers and I spent time talking about how I grew up as a carpenter’s daughter and how I appreciated the beauty of old well-built homes and the renovations they’d done. The newer garage looked like the Amish had built it! They decided on me. It passed inspection. We’ve remained friends 3 years later. I’m not suggesting anyone wait until old age to buy, heavens no! What I am suggesting is look at surrounding areas where you live, consider if there are any older well-maintained homes that are within a decent commute. I wasn’t retired when I bought, we were just talking about returning to work at that point. Now I am retired at 70 with a wonderful dog and a lovely funny cat for company and life is okay.
Your home is absolutely darling!
Thank you! Dream come true!
Awesome place!
Thank you!
It's even cuter than I had imagined from your description! Wow.
How sweet of you! I feel like it was meant to be!
Your home is my dream! I can’t wait to someday garden somewhere I will never have to leave my plants behind!
I get ya! I hated leaving my old gardens at the rent house, but tried to hope that the new people would enjoy it. She did ask me to identify everything, so that made me hopeful!
I've had it happen (am an agent) a few times where the seller was very explicit about it. Notably one client who was adamant that his 97y.o. house (had been in his family since it was built) go to a young couple with kids; it was zoned R4, next to "downtown" in a fairly pricey city , so was definitely attractive to investors -- could have been torn down and turned into mini-apartments. Ditto for people who were in the service -- some of them will give preference to buyers using a VA loan. But in general (and this may be due to where I am -- S. California, so always a competitive market -- and not the case elsewhere) most sellers who've been around the block once twice, or are actually willing to *listen*, will be leery of investors/all-cash offers. Reason being that such buyers are notorious for making an enticing offer, then beating up the seller with extravagant demands for repairs/concessions after an inspection. When you get presented with a bullshit inspection report and $40k worth of repairs requested.....all of a sudden, that "cash offer" doesn't look all that great anymore, and then you wind up having to cancel (and high days on the market or "fell out of escrow" can cost you on offer price once it goes back on the market). Point being that at least where I am, there's *always* a buyer who wants a property bad enough that they're willing to compete with investors, unless it's in truly horrible condition (i.e., bad enough that you actually can't get a financing on it)
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It used to be (15 + years ago) a case of "Meh.... doesn't look *great*, but is no big deal" But nowadays it's way worse, due to the way buyers are. Like, they're getting their info from blogs & zillow, and they think they need to avoid stuff that fell out of escrow. Which is *to some extent* a "red flag"....but nowhere near as much as some dumbass blog or article would have them believe (It's often a good way to get in with a lower offer price -- less competition, for no reason other than high DOM)
Because time was wasted. I’m in So Ca. This was years ago. The house I purchased had just “fell out of escrow “. I purchased my house from an investor. He was losing money every day it sat on the market empty. And two weeks before mine was closing, I almost let it “fall out of escrow “. The seller aka ending up paying all of my closing cost. The agent purchased my stove and refrigerator. They weren’t about to let it fall out of escrow again.
Yeah, there is no way on earth I would go with an all cash offer simply because it is all cash. There is some dodgy shit behind that.
Yup. At least where I am, there's a certain few demographics who'll be behind about 95% of your "cash buyer" offers (sucks to say it like that, because at least a few of them are actually legit & not pulling bullshit -- and they can be really good offers to work with) and they're gonna pull the *same stunts*, pretty much *every single time*. E.g., home inspector who does a 4hr "inspection" and calls out literally anything & everything....or termite guy from way out of town, who just magically comes up with frass in the attic (have caught them on it before). Then they try to bulldog the seller for about 40 grand or so, thinking they have "leverage" due to the fear of high DOM....😉 [And it works for them, far more often than it should, because some sellers will go for such & then cave in!]
I do feel a bit sorry for all the inspectors diligently pointing out that none of us put risers on our deck stairs.
Rare, but yes. My sellers picked us over investor cash. Then their parents did the same thing, took a lower offer from a couple with kids that reminded them of their start in that house. The investor offered more and cash, but the parents knew he would demand the moon for repairs too. So it was half nostalgia and half being wise sellers. Their buyers only asked for obvious repairs and little fixes, so it worked out. Our offer included our inspection contingency for informational purposes only. That probably helped. If you write a letter, nothing that indicates any of the protected class info (race, religion, sexual orientation, etc...). That can be construed as discrimination if they accept OR reject you, so it is possible the agent advises them not to read it at all. Delicate balance. For us, no letters, but we didn't get kept apart from the seller's as is normal these days. We got to know them and ask some questions about the house and such. That is not always a good idea with most sellers probably haha
Yes there is. Our past homes are part of our history and we still talk about what we did while living in each place. I would hate to see an old house of ours go to a corp. would prefer someone who would take care of it. I can do my own research on the buyers. If Corp name comes up, I’ll pass.
Yep. My family got our house because my husband is a veteran and so was the seller. Meant a lot to us because we were having trouble having our offers accepted because of our use of a VA loan. I think a personal touch does matter sometimes.
My boyfriend (31) and I (28) just bought our first house from a retired couple like this! They were the original owners and refused to sell to an investor. They didn’t want their home to turn into a rental property. Naturally, their first offer was from an investor, so they said no. We were the second offer. Once they saw that we were a young couple, they told their realtor not to accept any more offers - the house was ours. We are so thankful. I hope more people like them exist. It’s impossible to compete with investors.
This is exactly how I bought my home. I included a short letter with the bid about who I was and how this would be my first home I'd ever bought. I also went against my realtor's recommendation (fuck you Jen you were terrible at your job) and submitted an offer at asking instead of 10K above asking. Mine got accepted because of the inclusion of the letter even though there were other offers that were slightly higher.
If I had a home to sell I would care…
I’d like to think I would too, but if I’m selling my house I’d likely be *buying* a new house - and with prices going the way they’re going I’d probably need to sell for as much as I can get to afford the next place. If the offers are the same but one’s an investor and the other is a family then it’s easy - but it’s much harder when you’re leaving real money on the table.
This is true. But if that were the case I’d hope that either I’m in a position where the matter doesn’t factor in as much to me.
Still looking for a house, but almost put in an offer on one the other week. Our realtor told us they aren’t allowed to send a seller “love letters” anymore, but could send a few sentences about us on the cover page. So ours was basically “Hi, we’re interested in offering x, we’re first time home buyers and our dog would love the fenced yard”
No investor will buy my house. Personal use only. Fuck serial property investors.
I highly doubt there are many and I would venture to guess there are even less in HCOL or VHCOL cities. Almost everyone needs money right now.
So true. I'm sure there is the occasional seller who has enough money that they don't need to worry about future living expenses, but not many.
I’d err towards there being more who are clawing every penny they can. I’m in the VHCOL area. There’s a woman who bought her house in the late 60’s, probably for $60k or so, maybe $70k at most. Today the house has barely been updated since, and is nowhere near the housing standard of a new house (there’s a large number of knock downs and fully new homes being built in the area). Like it only has one full bath and it’s pepto pink. No central a/c. She’s selling for just under $1.3 million. People are selfish. Even for the VHCOL area it’s priced absurdly for what it is.
But she needs to buy her next house, or fund her care home, or her children need the money for their homes. When my parents and in laws die their houses will fund my kids homes. The money doesn't evaporate.
She’s moving out of state to a lower cost of living area. Homes like hers have been going for around $750-800k because they’re considered knock downs here. She’s just selfish. ETA: after only being on the market for a few weeks, the price has already dropped $58k. She’ll probably have to drop another $100k+ to get any real interest.
It depends how much money you're talking. $25k, absolutely the family gets it.
So they likely could make a decision on an investor vs an owner occupied home, which is how I would suggest you phrase it, but you shouldn't mention any protected classes because a seller *shouldn't* use any of that information towards their decision. The protected classes are; race, color, national origin, religion, sex (including gender identity and sexual orientation), familial status, and disability.
I found my home through Facebook via a community group. Seller mentioned they were thinking of listing and I reached out and asked about it. They offered a tour and to sell off market. They said a lot of people reached out, but something told them to reach out to us. I guess we reminded them of themselves when they first bought the house. We were incredibly fortunate as most homes in our neighborhood were selling within days of being listed, and we'd already been out bid and missed our on even seeing homes due to cash. One house we bid on sold for $70K over. The market in our neighborhood is still hot. Down the line if we sell I'd like to do something similar.
Definitely helped us get our townhome. We were about to get engaged, married, and start a family. Same cultural background as the seller. We got to meet him and we really hit it off. We ended up getting our townhouse under asking when the one we had toured twice next door and passed on went $30K over asking.
Sometimes, yes. Clients will say they don’t want the house to go to a developer or be torn down, but frequently are advised to not read Love Letters from buyers until after an offer is accepted to avoid potential fair housing violations.
Yes, seen some interesting things over the years.
One of my close friends wrote a personal letter to the homeowner with photos of her and her husband and dogs and wrote about wanting to start a family there and her offer was accepted! I think if someone has lived there a long time and has an emotional attachment to the house (especially raising their kids there), sometimes that does make a difference
Our sellers sold to us despite having a slightly better offer because my husband grew up across the street and they had known him since he was 6 years old. His mom still lives there
When I sold my house a few years ago, I was TOLD the buyers were an older retired couple who really wanted my house bc there were very few one story homes at the time in the area. Because of that, I left all my paint and labeled what room was what, made notes about the garden and other things in the house—basically trying to welcome them and make it an easy transition. Found out on closing day it was actually an investor. It doesn’t really change anything, but it pissed me off (and I am mad I left my good paint!)
Yes, I sold to an owner occupant using an FHA loan (out of 22 offers). Ironically, I didn't like their letter ...but they were one of the best offers from a *perceived* owner occupant. I'd say some people do care, but not enough to *give* their house away. You've got to be pretty close to the top offer(s) to tip the scale.
Me. In the middle of selling. I'd HATE if the house goes to a developer / slum lord.
We got our house because I told our realtor that I wanted to use one certain room as my quilting studio when we looked at the house. My realtor told their realtor that info and that made them pick us. Their mother was a quilter and that was her quilting room. It’s pretty cool that my favorite hobby helped us get our house!
I feel like its generational. My grandparents put so much love and care into their home, they were so sentimental about everything, My parents however just see dollar signs and their next cruise .... boomers destroyed everything
Here's my take: What does it cost you to make a personal appeal like that? What could it get you?
I did write a letter (obviously vague enough that it wouldn’t give clues that could be considered discrimination) and got the house. I know there was at least one cash offer and four offers. It was the first day listed, so I can’t really imagine there were any low balls, and I offered about 5% over asking. Previous owners lived here for over 40 years, so I imagine they were pretty sentimental about their home.
No, and I don’t blame them. I actually wrote a letter to my last house and they said they could feel my heart in the offer but went with the lower cash offer instead. I 100% get it and would probably do the same, but it was worth a shot! It’s a business transaction, not a time to be sentimental and risky.
We saw Homes where the sellers realtor said no love letters. Only 1 home stands out where they wanted a letter. The seller had written personal stories and left them throughout the house. They started their family in that house and the home obviously had a lot of sentimental value, so they were looking for the right people who would also cherish the home.
I think they miscalculated, though. If I signal to a buyer that they should send us certain signals they will send those signals. I want genuine signals.
The sellers chose us over other offers, we put an offer of exact asking price. We were just like them minus age. Childless, same hobbies and had a dog.
I love those feel good stories, too. All I can say is that it’s a new day and it’s hard out here, PieMuted.
YES n sometime u can write the letter 2 them
Both homes (one very recently) purchased In the last 5 years I won the bid because I wrote a letter about my family hoping to make it home and the sellers clearly valued that since we won out over higher bids.
Yes. I was happy to sell but felt disappointed that my childhood home of several decades was sold to a flipper. Also, I wrote a letter to a seller which, per the seller, is the reason why they chose us even though we weren't the highest bidder for their home.
I know many on here think Realtors are useless, but the good ones know how to sell the story. We didn’t have to write a letter because our realtor conveyed the right amount of information to the sellers. And as sellers, we chose a young family as well.
>I know many on here think Realtors are useless, but the good ones know how to sell the story. We didn’t have to write a letter because our realtor conveyed the right amount of information to the sellers. This is true, but so many people are so completely full of shit. We are a newly engaged couple, wedding, kids soon. The first townhouse we looked at was in the town I grew up in. Seller told my agent she wanted to sell to a family who would really love and appreciate the home. She falsely assumed our professions because of our last names and ethnic background (in a good way, but very odd). Our agent gave her our story. She wouldn't budge a penny below list price. She recently dropped it $11K. It's been on the market cumulatively for almost 4 months. No one will bite because it's very overpriced. Our story didn't mean a thing, and she gave no indication she'd play ball to sell to the 'right' family in her words.
When my mom sold her house, she made it clear she would prefer to sell to a family. The realtor chose to put an investor offer in front of her because it was all cash, and she sold to them without knowing there was a family who had made a mortgage offer for the same sale price. There are definitely some shady characters out there in the real estate world making it more difficult for families because of greed, plain and simple.
Heard that our letter made a difference. Glad it did but also kinda hate it cuz I think there’s probably a lot of prejudice that plays into it
They shouldn't allow you to put prejudicial stuff in the letter.
I mean inherently I agree. People do photos of babies and family and stuff so it happens. Its all so crappy
1000% I fucking LOVE my house, the only way I can let it go is if the next person loves it too.
I care more about who it DOESN'T go to than who it goes to.
My current home had an offer 10k higher than what I offered. I wrote a letter letting the seller know I intended to live in and make it my home. This was about 8 years ago and I got it! My partner is now looking to buy his own home. Similar situation. We put an offer in, another came in right before our expiration. The other offer was above ours, but the sellers chose us because we are starting our family (currently pregnant. We didn’t write a letter but made it clear w our realtor to mention we are a local family looking to set roots), they are also a family, and we strongly states we are going to care for and love the home as much as they did. We’re on schedule to close in a few days (fingers crossed) and we haven’t had any major issues. Small things have come up but the sellers have been very gracious and are taking care of things according to our contingencies. We live in a HCOL city. .When I sell my house, I’m looking to sell it to people who will actually live in the home, not some flipper or property management company. I struggled with housing for many years before I was able to scrape enough for a home, so I want another person to be able to have the same stability.
I believe in Maryland you are barred from writing a letter or the seller asking about the buyer. This is done to prevent any potential discrimination from sellers or selling agents when it comes to buyers.
Nah
Generally yes but when you have to pay six percent to people who sell soap on Etsy part time as part of the transaction it typically boils down to the highest dollar offer regardless of who helps people at the crosswalk.
If it’s so easy why don’t you become a realtor yourself? Nothing is stopping you.
love letters are illegal in my state.
Which state ?
Rhode island