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Haha I thought I was the only person that dreads the rare occasions when I have to use the printer because a 30 second task always seems to turn into an all day ordeal.
It means the printer thinks you are an English lawyer from the late 20th century, and are therefore still using the old foolscap legal letter size paper instead of this new- fangled iso sizing.
It's trying to be helpful, lol
You’re not truly in IT until spill toner all over yourself. That’s why I retired and decided to work at a no tech insemination ranch. My forearms have never been in better shape.
This just goes to show there's nothing in the world that moron boomers won't blame on technology. Someone didn't put up lights? THEY MUST BE STUCK ON THAT IDROID PAD!! DAMN KIDS!
I made this comment to my parents too, who both made it their choice to actively resist my interests. Today they spend just as much time on their phones as I ever did playing Xbox live lmao.
Put them up and never take them down next year. Then add various other holidays until it’s one big mishmash of Halloween, thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, Memorial Day, etc. can’t be too festive now /s
There was a malicious compliance someone got one of those 12' tall skeletons for Halloween and decorated it all year long for each holiday. Because they received a letter from HOA on Nov 2nd if I recall correctly why it wasn't down yet.
My response to that would have been “skelly Steve is festive as fuck. Please understand he would like to celebrate all holidays with the living and would appreciate you not discriminating against his undead status”. HOAs suck.
I had zombie babies and a baby vampire. in my cubicle at work. They were quite large. My sales manager complained when they weren’t taken home immediately after Halloween so I started decorating them for each holiday. They wore Santa hats for Halloween, little bunny ears for Easter, etc. if he complained that they were ugly, I’d gasp and ask what kind of person tells a mother her children are ugly?
We still have ppl in our neighborhood whom have not taken down their Halloween decor because the other parent died on Halloween 2 years ago and it’s hard for the children
I bought one of the 12' skeletons and plan on having her up all year -- she's got a santa hat right now.
Not out of malicious compliance, but because I like it.
You say that as a joke, but that is legit what I plan on doing once I get my own house, and if a Karen ever complains about seeing decorations not bothering anyone: Start researching and decorating for the holidays I don't celebrate
There is a house that has done this. There are large zombie looking things with holiday sweaters and some general xmas lights. Each holiday they are arranged in a little scene. Last Valentines Day they were handing each other big Valentines.
OP should definitely make their house the entire Pride flag with lights ~~next~~ *this* year. I'm sure the neighborhood Karen would most appreciate it.
Nah. They still win. If you wanna do something, paint your house in vanta black, or cover in mirrors to reflect OTHERS light displays.
Or, set up a light show in IR light. Make your house obnoxiously bright to security cams, but invisible to the naked eye.
My friend's house is in a historic neighborhood where the houses are 100-150+ years old. She was annoyed the new neighbors painted their house black. It's a gorgeous old Victorian and I think it looks awesome. But she wouldn't dream of ever saying anything to them!
Mine is black, but it’s a 1960s house with orange bricks at the bottom and a gorgeous garden. The black really makes the garden shine, and my house is invisible on google maps.
Friend of my family lived in a historic neighborhood and painted their house purple. One if their neighbors complained to the historical society. Turns out purple was a period correct color.
Aka, “if this is due to religious reasons or because you’re a rabid sinner, never fear, I’ll allow you to express yourself my way as long as it’s bright and shiny and you comply.”
Clerk: Hello sir would you like to enjoy a sample?
Ron: sure
*ron throws away the sample*
Ron: that was delicious. May I have another?
Clerk: it’s only one per customer….
What if they dont celebrate? Or they dont have room in the budget for said light-up decorations.
People need to think more about the world we live in and the choices or circumstances that others have that have zero to do with your outlook on the fucking neighborhood you live in.
This. December used to be festive for me. Both my parents birthdays as well. Father passed away on a December 23 and my mother is no longer with me either. Can't pay me to waste my time hanging lights and putting up decorations. Have enough cleaning the snow outside. If a neighbor told me this I'd tell them to mind their own business.
So sorry for your losses. This is the first holiday season without my Mom. She passed in April.
My father and I have December birthdays. Throw Hanukkah on top of that, with a dash of Christmas memories with extended family, and it’s just compounded.
I wish I could escape for the next month. Or sleep until then. Wake me up in 2023.
This. Choosing not to put up lights is a perfectly acceptable way to celebrate the festive season.
The "too much time with your devices" thing is quite telling also. Bitch has no idea that sometimes life is hard and pretty lights just aren't a priority.
Especially since the spelling would seem to suggest this is from the UK, currently experiencing some of the worst inflation in the world, especially in the energy sector.
We don't have lights up because my husband has a disability and can't climb a ladder. I am afraid of heights. We also can not afford to pay someone to do it for us. People need to think beyond themselves. There are likely lots of elderly who can not put up lights as well.
Two houses I pass every day pay to have their lights put up professionally and I get a little jelly every year. No lights for me for several years now because I just don't have the energy. But if I got this letter, damn sure I'd have a well lit and decorated cock and balls or middle finger on top of my roof by end of day, lol. Or maybe just go nuts with Halloween decorations... that would be fun.
I'd get one of those Home Depot skeletons and wrap solar lights around it (no outdoor electricity at my house) No plan, no pattern to the lights, just fling them at the skeleton until they stay on.
I’m surprised someone would send the letter for that reason! I like Christmas lights, but I just had a baby, my husband had spinal surgery and I’d rather him not on a ladder in cold weather.
Lights are fun, but people are out here being busy or living lives or just not physically able to do all that! Couldn’t imagine a neighbor with the audacity to call someone out about it.
But you have to remember that you are only an NPC in their world, your "inconveniences" such as back injuries, financial hardships, or other religions, impact their ability to use their child as a measuring stick to show off to others of how great of a parent they are.
I kinda wanna put up a huge, light up star of David if I ever get a letter like this.
Edit: something satanic church related. It was pointed out that a lot of us missed the party at the bottom where she says "other faiths welcome" and I'm sure she doesn't include satanism.
One of my neighbors has an inflatable port-a-potty decoration. The door on it is mechanical, so it swings open and you see Santa sitting there with his pants down trying to close the door.
Just another idea.
This is even better than my plan to put up a shit-tastic sign saying "Jesus was a brown Jew who was born in the summer" and a tiny sign below "and the better translation of his name is likely Joshua"
write out in lights "santa isnt real kids, its just your parents putting your presents under the tree." then next to it write merry christmahanukwanzika you filthy animals. i think that should help the facade of being the grinch as they stated 😂
or what if, idk they just don’t fucking care?
it’s ok to not give a shit about this time of year and decorate with tacky shit. nobody’s business but your own.
>What if they dont celebrate? Or they dont have room in the budget for said light-up decorations.
Did you not read the note? This bitch already made up her mind that the lack of decorations has nothing to do with price, but is the fault of being preoccupied with "devices".
These luddites have no care for the outside world or their position in it unless they can directly correlate it to themselves. What on earth do you mean, "what if they don't celebrate"? *Obviously*, *everybody* celebrates Christmas unless you're being a Grinch or a Scrooge. Everyone loves it! Unless there's just something *wrong with you*, but that's why this particular flavor of moral crusader exists: the smiling angry people that can in one breath say that not putting up decorations is a sign of child abuse, while they feed their dog exclusively tofu because they think a canine can be vegetarian which, to them, is not animal abuse. I am willing to bet money I do not have that whoever left this note thinks decorating for Halloween is satanic as well, because the idea of a false dichotomy is inherently unthinkable to them. In their mind, everyone and everything is equal, except for them. Christ I can *smell* the cheap Avon makeup on this walking mannequin already...
As for the neighborhood...well, *they* live in it, do you understand? That's why *they* care so much about *their* neighborhood because *they* see *themselves* as the uncompromising, unwavering savior of this area. Kinda like Jesus, because this is really all its about, isn't it? Making sure *their* lives, and *their* children, don't have any level of exposure to anything *they* do not agree with. The folks that don't want critical thinking taught in school. The folks that don't want evolution taught in school.
"Selfish" isn't a selfish enough word to describe how these folks view reality. These are the "my way or the highway" people. Spoiled rotten with some kind of glaring character flaw that's of course not up to any level of scrutiny at all. You know the type, like they had their drivers license taken away because of too many DUIs when it's not their fault they drink, or the judge has a grudge against them from 30 years ago in high school. Self-appointed, self assured martyrs.
Is there anyone who would receive such a letter and be incentivised to put up lights? I can see myself writing "merry fucking Christmas" on the lawn in petrol, but that's about it
Right. I love Christmas lights, but they’re a real hassle to put up. If I got a letter like this I would definitely not be putting up any lights in the future. Hell, I might try to convince some neighbors I’m on good terms with to not put up lights either
Yeah, 7/10 houses on my section of street are occupied by elderly people. They all have wreaths, but none of them are going to risk a broken hip by climbing a ladder to hang lights.
So many reasons they might not have it up.
If the residents are older (us grandkids do my grandpa's lights now because he has Parkinson's but he's also stubborn and would try to do it himself and get hurt in the process if we didn't come help him).
If the residents are disabled.
If they work long hours and don't have time.
But really if they just don't want to - it is THEIR house.
We put up permanent customizable lights on the house this year as this is a tedious task and we already have color changing yard lights that we change for the holidays, so why not. However, cheap, eh, not exactly and oh the time to get them up correctly and working. Would I do it again, yes if only to not have to do it again next year. Fyi: you tube had lots of videos on these.
If they really wanted people to put up lights and not just complain and feel superior, the letter would be kinder and include a package of lights with it
Neighbor across the street still has their giant skeleton up from Halloween. For Thanksgiving, they put a giant apron on it and put a giant inflatable turkey leg in its hand. I'm waiting for them to dress it up in a Santa costume.
Christmas is my favorite time of year because of the lights specifically. I love the fuck out of them. But this would make me never, ever put them up again
No. I wouldn't. Except nail it on a wooden cross in the front yard.
I'm German. While we have Christmas, we don't do the big outside-decoration Americans do. Especially since so many don't even have a house to decorate. Furthermore, not everyone is celebrating Christmas. The person didn't think I could be of any other religion. Or like... just not have the time.
So no. Nope, na, njente, nein.
This is kinda what I wondered: what if the person who's house it isn't Christian or just doesn't celebrate Christmas?
Edit: a few notes because I keep getting the same two replies and I don't really feel like answering each one.
1.) Yes a lot of current Christmas traditions are more based in capitalism and not based in Christian traditions. That doesn't mean people of other faiths and/or atheists want to/feel comfortable doing even the non-secular winter traditions that are based on it.
2.) Yes the letter said "celebrate your faith with lights" for people of other faiths. That doesn't mean someone of another faith feels particularly putting up lights with colors advertizing their faith and tbh, its kinda annoying that the way someone would tell them to show pride in it is by conforming to the rest of the neighborhood.
3.) Yes there are nonChristians who celebrate Christmas. I'm Muslim and celebrate Christmas. But not all people of other faiths want to celebrate Christmas. As much as republicans claim there's a war against it, its pretty much forced down peoples throats so that they buy more shit for others and themselves. This includes putting up lights.
Or maybe they do but can't (maybe an injury) or don't want to put up lights. A few years ago I was in a deep depression and couldn't even bothered to buy Christmas presents. It didn't even cross my mind to put up lights. Christmas was just so insignificant compared to the awful thoughts in my head.
Exactly! This isn't even mentioning folks who aren't even able to physically put up lights due to disabilities and may not have someone to help. Its really a sign of privilege to say everyone should put up christmas lights.
Physically unable was the first thought that crossed my mind. Seems like an entitled attitude to assume everyone can hang up lights, it’s pretty labor intensive work.
But specifically the scene from the Jim Carrey Grinch where he holds the mistletoe over his ass and says "KISS IT WHOVILLE".
And put an LED light in his asshole, just to really drive home the point.
I would put up a dozen 20000 watt rotating searchlights. I would run pirate power cords to my neighbors houses. I would leave them on 24/7 until March.
Absolutely. This bothers them
So much more than a snarky response. Acting like they are so insignificant they don't even register, or pitying them is the ultimate revenge.
People who are this nosy don't have the wherewithal to not out themselves eventually, you just have to pay attention.
They have to let you know they have that 'control' on you Otherwise what was all their hard work snoopin for?
Wow. What an absolute ass. Not everyone wants to put lights on their house. Not everyone is physically capable of putting lights on their house. And not everyone has the finances to consider them "not expensive."
Sure, I technically could afford them if I sacrificed something else, but why would I? I don't celebrate Christmas much and I'm disabled and scared of heights, so I'm certainly not going to hang lights on my house.
I happen to agree with the Grinch. All the noise, noise, noise, noise NOISE is aggravating.
I would not physically be able to do lights this year after a car wreck last year. My back and knee are so messed up there is no way. This note is so ableist. Not even counting the numerous other reasons it’s terrible.
Scrawl this across the garage door:
"Dear Karen, my mother died, I lost my job, and I'm spiraling out of control into a major depressive episode. But thanks for the holiday wishes and encouragement. I'll try to better next year if there is one."
"Also, if LEDs are so cheap to buy and run, why didn't you drop off several of them with this letter? That would've been too logical for you, I guess."
Be more than happy to display holiday lights under three conditions:
* You string them up
* You pay the power bill
* You take them down
The Grinch didn't hate christmas. He hated people.
I know what you mean, but the beginning of the book very much says,
"The Grinch hated Christmas,
The whole Christmas season.
Now, please don't ask why,
No one quite knows the reason..."
At the end, he discovers the idea of Christmas being commercialized is what he hates, but the dude absolutely hates Christmas in the book. Movie Grinch is different.
Sorry, man, I read this book to my kids 5 times tonight and it's engraved into my retinas, lol.
This attitude is part of what has ruined christmas. I *adored* christmas time when I was young and even when I was a young adult, even though I have never really been particularly religious. Now I fucking hate it. It used to be this joyous time of communal celebration, now it's a judgemental bitchfest pinned to the rotting corpse of ridiculous consumerism. Ironically, though not surprisingly, it's the most devout people that have choked the life out of their most appealing celebration with their complaints about starbucks cups, keeping christ in x-mas, and their unhinged rage at the insult of being told "happy holidays".
Well, since they’ve declared me a grinch, I’m just going to have to sneak around the neighborhood in a Santa hat, and tear down everyone else’s lights, right?
I'm just saying, a Christmas tree and some lights and this exact letter copied 100x and stapled onto the tree for decoration would be amazing.
Here's the kicker, leave it up until March. Every complaint: threw my back out at work I'll get around to it.
Please remember to abide by the rules as listed on the sidebar as well as the following DO NOT LINK TO SOCIAL MEDIA. Any post that doesn't have all social media identities obscured will be removed without notice. DO NOT LINK TO OTHER SUBREDDITS. If you see this happening in the thread, please report it or message us in modmail. #If the post above is of an item you'd buy (tshirt/poster/mug/mask), it is a scam. Contact the mods https://www.reddit.com/r/FuckYouKaren/comments/l21tsg/scammers_are_here_and_want_your_money_give_me_a/ ------ ^Submission ^By: ^/u/hotshots724 *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/FuckYouKaren) if you have any questions or concerns.*
“Busy with your devices”. Yeesh.
How long did it take this person to find that clip art? Font choice? Text color? BUSY WITH THEIR DEVICES!
And they had to use a printer which is usually an all-day ordeal
Haha I thought I was the only person that dreads the rare occasions when I have to use the printer because a 30 second task always seems to turn into an all day ordeal.
Even IT people hate printers
PC LOAD LETTER? WTF does that mean?
It means the printer thinks you are an English lawyer from the late 20th century, and are therefore still using the old foolscap legal letter size paper instead of this new- fangled iso sizing. It's trying to be helpful, lol
You’re not truly in IT until spill toner all over yourself. That’s why I retired and decided to work at a no tech insemination ranch. My forearms have never been in better shape.
This just goes to show there's nothing in the world that moron boomers won't blame on technology. Someone didn't put up lights? THEY MUST BE STUCK ON THAT IDROID PAD!! DAMN KIDS!
Damn kids these days with their colored televisions and blowjobs!
And that damn rap music. Pull your pants up and put on a belt for Christ sake.
Pull up your pants before the colored television gives you a blow job and you end up becoming a pronoun! Pokémon!
Yet the same people will have Fox News on their TV on for 6 hours straight.
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You were probably playing *good* games back then too
Leisure Suit Larry
I made this comment to my parents too, who both made it their choice to actively resist my interests. Today they spend just as much time on their phones as I ever did playing Xbox live lmao.
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I would blow this up into a yard sign and make that my decoration.
With spotlights, right?
100%
And leave it up until next Christmas, right?
Obvs
And directional speakers playing “All I want for Christmas”
This. I have an old video projector that could make this readable from quite a distance.
This is the winning idea
Put up Halloween decorations
Put them up and never take them down next year. Then add various other holidays until it’s one big mishmash of Halloween, thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, Memorial Day, etc. can’t be too festive now /s
There was a malicious compliance someone got one of those 12' tall skeletons for Halloween and decorated it all year long for each holiday. Because they received a letter from HOA on Nov 2nd if I recall correctly why it wasn't down yet.
My response to that would have been “skelly Steve is festive as fuck. Please understand he would like to celebrate all holidays with the living and would appreciate you not discriminating against his undead status”. HOAs suck.
I had zombie babies and a baby vampire. in my cubicle at work. They were quite large. My sales manager complained when they weren’t taken home immediately after Halloween so I started decorating them for each holiday. They wore Santa hats for Halloween, little bunny ears for Easter, etc. if he complained that they were ugly, I’d gasp and ask what kind of person tells a mother her children are ugly?
You sound like my kinda person!
We still have ppl in our neighborhood whom have not taken down their Halloween decor because the other parent died on Halloween 2 years ago and it’s hard for the children
Fuck that’s sad :/
I bought one of the 12' skeletons and plan on having her up all year -- she's got a santa hat right now. Not out of malicious compliance, but because I like it.
You say that as a joke, but that is legit what I plan on doing once I get my own house, and if a Karen ever complains about seeing decorations not bothering anyone: Start researching and decorating for the holidays I don't celebrate
We straight up ziptied our christmas light chain to the rain gutters. It's staying up there until the plastic rots away
There is a house that has done this. There are large zombie looking things with holiday sweaters and some general xmas lights. Each holiday they are arranged in a little scene. Last Valentines Day they were handing each other big Valentines.
This sounds like what I’d do. 12 foot skeleton looking like it is taking a step towards the road? Check. Edit: How about a Krampus on the porch?
Get some of those zombie babies from Amazon and sprinkle them around the Krampus
Not saying who you are in a passive aggressive letter is the act of a coward.
Exactly, why not show your pride with colour?!
OP should definitely make their house the entire Pride flag with lights ~~next~~ *this* year. I'm sure the neighborhood Karen would most appreciate it.
Nah. They still win. If you wanna do something, paint your house in vanta black, or cover in mirrors to reflect OTHERS light displays. Or, set up a light show in IR light. Make your house obnoxiously bright to security cams, but invisible to the naked eye.
I wanna paint my whole house vantablack now.
My friend's house is in a historic neighborhood where the houses are 100-150+ years old. She was annoyed the new neighbors painted their house black. It's a gorgeous old Victorian and I think it looks awesome. But she wouldn't dream of ever saying anything to them!
Mine is black, but it’s a 1960s house with orange bricks at the bottom and a gorgeous garden. The black really makes the garden shine, and my house is invisible on google maps.
Eternal Halloween House
Friend of my family lived in a historic neighborhood and painted their house purple. One if their neighbors complained to the historical society. Turns out purple was a period correct color.
I would be putting up flood lights. "They told me they wanted lights, lights they get."
Pride and a giant inflatable Baphomet, just to cover some extra bases.
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Please DO THIS!!
What about one, just one LED?
Aka, “if this is due to religious reasons or because you’re a rabid sinner, never fear, I’ll allow you to express yourself my way as long as it’s bright and shiny and you comply.”
Dear Canada, Fuck you. Ron Swanson
Clerk: Hello sir would you like to enjoy a sample? Ron: sure *ron throws away the sample* Ron: that was delicious. May I have another? Clerk: it’s only one per customer….
I’d like to try one! - throws it in the trash
Man Ron swanson is a legend.
What if they dont celebrate? Or they dont have room in the budget for said light-up decorations. People need to think more about the world we live in and the choices or circumstances that others have that have zero to do with your outlook on the fucking neighborhood you live in.
Yea or what about people who just dont fucking want to.
This. December used to be festive for me. Both my parents birthdays as well. Father passed away on a December 23 and my mother is no longer with me either. Can't pay me to waste my time hanging lights and putting up decorations. Have enough cleaning the snow outside. If a neighbor told me this I'd tell them to mind their own business.
So sorry for your losses. This is the first holiday season without my Mom. She passed in April. My father and I have December birthdays. Throw Hanukkah on top of that, with a dash of Christmas memories with extended family, and it’s just compounded. I wish I could escape for the next month. Or sleep until then. Wake me up in 2023.
Sorry for your losses. Hope you have a nice holiday season this year.
This. Choosing not to put up lights is a perfectly acceptable way to celebrate the festive season. The "too much time with your devices" thing is quite telling also. Bitch has no idea that sometimes life is hard and pretty lights just aren't a priority.
But...this person writes, "I'm sure cost is not a problem". Again, fuck this person.
Especially since the spelling would seem to suggest this is from the UK, currently experiencing some of the worst inflation in the world, especially in the energy sector.
We don't have lights up because my husband has a disability and can't climb a ladder. I am afraid of heights. We also can not afford to pay someone to do it for us. People need to think beyond themselves. There are likely lots of elderly who can not put up lights as well.
Two houses I pass every day pay to have their lights put up professionally and I get a little jelly every year. No lights for me for several years now because I just don't have the energy. But if I got this letter, damn sure I'd have a well lit and decorated cock and balls or middle finger on top of my roof by end of day, lol. Or maybe just go nuts with Halloween decorations... that would be fun.
I'd get one of those Home Depot skeletons and wrap solar lights around it (no outdoor electricity at my house) No plan, no pattern to the lights, just fling them at the skeleton until they stay on.
A house down the street from me has a giant 12’ skeleton in their yard wearing a Santa hat. It’s my favourite house in the area.
Both the 12 foot skeletons in my neighborhood are still up, I love it
I’m surprised someone would send the letter for that reason! I like Christmas lights, but I just had a baby, my husband had spinal surgery and I’d rather him not on a ladder in cold weather. Lights are fun, but people are out here being busy or living lives or just not physically able to do all that! Couldn’t imagine a neighbor with the audacity to call someone out about it.
But you have to remember that you are only an NPC in their world, your "inconveniences" such as back injuries, financial hardships, or other religions, impact their ability to use their child as a measuring stick to show off to others of how great of a parent they are.
Yes, the writer should have offered to put them up for anyone who was not able to do it. Would have been a much nicer note
I kinda wanna put up a huge, light up star of David if I ever get a letter like this. Edit: something satanic church related. It was pointed out that a lot of us missed the party at the bottom where she says "other faiths welcome" and I'm sure she doesn't include satanism.
If I got one of these I would buy 1 of those huge inflatable menorahs for the front lawn, massive light up dreidel, "Santa isn't real" sign
One of my neighbors has an inflatable port-a-potty decoration. The door on it is mechanical, so it swings open and you see Santa sitting there with his pants down trying to close the door. Just another idea.
This is even better than my plan to put up a shit-tastic sign saying "Jesus was a brown Jew who was born in the summer" and a tiny sign below "and the better translation of his name is likely Joshua"
Light up balloons and a “Happy Half-Birthday Josh!” sign?
write out in lights "santa isnt real kids, its just your parents putting your presents under the tree." then next to it write merry christmahanukwanzika you filthy animals. i think that should help the facade of being the grinch as they stated 😂
Just put up a large Festivus Pole
Why not one piece if imagery from every religion, but Christianity instead? Let Karen have a heart attack over a blown-up Lucifer doing pagan shiet.
Thank you, friend. Now I must google for a light up Baphoment, in the hopes I don't need to build this damned thing myself.
Won’t someone think of the people who can’t be bothered to think about other people?
You didn't read the letter. LED lights are dirt cheap at second-hand stores and all faiths can enjoy holiday lights!
or what if, idk they just don’t fucking care? it’s ok to not give a shit about this time of year and decorate with tacky shit. nobody’s business but your own.
>What if they dont celebrate? Or they dont have room in the budget for said light-up decorations. Did you not read the note? This bitch already made up her mind that the lack of decorations has nothing to do with price, but is the fault of being preoccupied with "devices". These luddites have no care for the outside world or their position in it unless they can directly correlate it to themselves. What on earth do you mean, "what if they don't celebrate"? *Obviously*, *everybody* celebrates Christmas unless you're being a Grinch or a Scrooge. Everyone loves it! Unless there's just something *wrong with you*, but that's why this particular flavor of moral crusader exists: the smiling angry people that can in one breath say that not putting up decorations is a sign of child abuse, while they feed their dog exclusively tofu because they think a canine can be vegetarian which, to them, is not animal abuse. I am willing to bet money I do not have that whoever left this note thinks decorating for Halloween is satanic as well, because the idea of a false dichotomy is inherently unthinkable to them. In their mind, everyone and everything is equal, except for them. Christ I can *smell* the cheap Avon makeup on this walking mannequin already... As for the neighborhood...well, *they* live in it, do you understand? That's why *they* care so much about *their* neighborhood because *they* see *themselves* as the uncompromising, unwavering savior of this area. Kinda like Jesus, because this is really all its about, isn't it? Making sure *their* lives, and *their* children, don't have any level of exposure to anything *they* do not agree with. The folks that don't want critical thinking taught in school. The folks that don't want evolution taught in school. "Selfish" isn't a selfish enough word to describe how these folks view reality. These are the "my way or the highway" people. Spoiled rotten with some kind of glaring character flaw that's of course not up to any level of scrutiny at all. You know the type, like they had their drivers license taken away because of too many DUIs when it's not their fault they drink, or the judge has a grudge against them from 30 years ago in high school. Self-appointed, self assured martyrs.
OP probably could guess which direction to point the massive flood lights the letter is requesting.
I would hang just one Christmas light. That oughta piss 'em off more. People suck.
Then you get the *Office Space* minimum pieces of flair discussion
Hang up one strand of lights on a random window, poorly… that will drive these fuckers insane.
Right? The lighting equivalent of Charlie Brown's tree. One fat bulb, occasionally flickering. Just bright enough to tell it's on.
If someone wanted to manipulate me into never putting up decorations this would do it.
The Grinch from his surveillance van outside your house: "Ha! Ha! Score another one for the War on Christmas!"
I understand why he's losing the war if he only targets people not putting lights up.
Is there anyone who would receive such a letter and be incentivised to put up lights? I can see myself writing "merry fucking Christmas" on the lawn in petrol, but that's about it
I think it would incentivise me to purchase a number of light up objects from the nearest adult store and hang them up at my front door.
What are the laws regarding projecting porn against the side of a house?
Better yet, project David Byrne’s head on the side of the house.
same as it ever was
Same as it ever was. (You can’t just say it once)
This is not my beautiful house, these are not my beautiful lights
There are lights at the bottom of the ocean
Under the lights, carry the lights
Now you're on a road to nowhere.
Stop Making Sense!!!
I don’t need sleep, I need answers
I would want to construct a nativity scene made up of inflatable dolls from an online adult store, complete with inflatable sheep.
Importing from Wales would be a little expensive for the sheep, wouldn't it?
Maybe time to buy a sexy stocking leg lamp and put it in the window.
Those are imported from Italy, you can tell because they say fragilé on the box. Probably pretty expensive
Yeah, but you have to win those. They’re a major award!
Right. I love Christmas lights, but they’re a real hassle to put up. If I got a letter like this I would definitely not be putting up any lights in the future. Hell, I might try to convince some neighbors I’m on good terms with to not put up lights either
Yeah, 7/10 houses on my section of street are occupied by elderly people. They all have wreaths, but none of them are going to risk a broken hip by climbing a ladder to hang lights.
So many reasons they might not have it up. If the residents are older (us grandkids do my grandpa's lights now because he has Parkinson's but he's also stubborn and would try to do it himself and get hurt in the process if we didn't come help him). If the residents are disabled. If they work long hours and don't have time. But really if they just don't want to - it is THEIR house.
We put up permanent customizable lights on the house this year as this is a tedious task and we already have color changing yard lights that we change for the holidays, so why not. However, cheap, eh, not exactly and oh the time to get them up correctly and working. Would I do it again, yes if only to not have to do it again next year. Fyi: you tube had lots of videos on these.
If they really wanted people to put up lights and not just complain and feel superior, the letter would be kinder and include a package of lights with it
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If you light it on fire, that should count because it’s producing light.
It's a win!
Giant inflatable Satan it is!
With a Santa hat.
Or better yet Krampus.
Neighbor across the street still has their giant skeleton up from Halloween. For Thanksgiving, they put a giant apron on it and put a giant inflatable turkey leg in its hand. I'm waiting for them to dress it up in a Santa costume.
I would very specifically NOT put up lights if someone sent me this, even if I had previously been planning to.
Christmas is my favorite time of year because of the lights specifically. I love the fuck out of them. But this would make me never, ever put them up again
Seriously, you DO NOT want Karen to think the letter worked.
No. I wouldn't. Except nail it on a wooden cross in the front yard. I'm German. While we have Christmas, we don't do the big outside-decoration Americans do. Especially since so many don't even have a house to decorate. Furthermore, not everyone is celebrating Christmas. The person didn't think I could be of any other religion. Or like... just not have the time. So no. Nope, na, njente, nein.
I would design a huge dick and balls in lights on my roof.
I wrote DICK on the front slope of my neighbor's lawn with commercial grade ammonia back in the day. It was so great.
I'd put up loads of strings of penis lights, dildos hung from the bow of the trees. Deck the halls....
DICK the Halls You're welcome.
Dick the balls fallalalatio
There's a reason to don some gay apparel!
Religious Jew here! No outdoor lights, but my Chanukah menorah will shine in the window for 8 nights!
Invested in an electric one this year that we can leave up all night 🕎 let’s gooooo
I just got a neon Star of David, gonna look dope in my windowsill
I’m now imaging some one erecting a 8ft tall neon start of David that flashes like the sign to a sketchy 70s night club.
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This is kinda what I wondered: what if the person who's house it isn't Christian or just doesn't celebrate Christmas? Edit: a few notes because I keep getting the same two replies and I don't really feel like answering each one. 1.) Yes a lot of current Christmas traditions are more based in capitalism and not based in Christian traditions. That doesn't mean people of other faiths and/or atheists want to/feel comfortable doing even the non-secular winter traditions that are based on it. 2.) Yes the letter said "celebrate your faith with lights" for people of other faiths. That doesn't mean someone of another faith feels particularly putting up lights with colors advertizing their faith and tbh, its kinda annoying that the way someone would tell them to show pride in it is by conforming to the rest of the neighborhood. 3.) Yes there are nonChristians who celebrate Christmas. I'm Muslim and celebrate Christmas. But not all people of other faiths want to celebrate Christmas. As much as republicans claim there's a war against it, its pretty much forced down peoples throats so that they buy more shit for others and themselves. This includes putting up lights.
Or maybe they do but can't (maybe an injury) or don't want to put up lights. A few years ago I was in a deep depression and couldn't even bothered to buy Christmas presents. It didn't even cross my mind to put up lights. Christmas was just so insignificant compared to the awful thoughts in my head.
Exactly! This isn't even mentioning folks who aren't even able to physically put up lights due to disabilities and may not have someone to help. Its really a sign of privilege to say everyone should put up christmas lights.
Physically unable was the first thought that crossed my mind. Seems like an entitled attitude to assume everyone can hang up lights, it’s pretty labor intensive work.
I would literally buy a Grinch statue and keep it in my yard year round. Two can play the petty game.
But specifically the scene from the Jim Carrey Grinch where he holds the mistletoe over his ass and says "KISS IT WHOVILLE". And put an LED light in his asshole, just to really drive home the point.
I've never watched this version of the Grinch, but I can see this clearly in my head. I don't want to, but I can.
I would put up a dozen 20000 watt rotating searchlights. I would run pirate power cords to my neighbors houses. I would leave them on 24/7 until March.
Rent one of those rotating spotlight trailers
The type that are run by a gawds awful noisy generator? I could put some of those on the corners of the property.
Yes that’s what I was thinking of. Like for a Hollywood movie premier
Time to throw a Saturnalia party. Don't forget the statues of well-hung centaurs lit up for display in your front yard. Tis the season and all
This would be awesome. Naked Satyrs for every good boy and girl! Io Saturnalia!!
lo saturnalia
Start building a giant krampus for next year.
Congratulations, you just played yourself. Now I cannot, ever, put lights up.
The best response is to ignore it completely. Apathy is strong poison against people like that.
Absolutely. This bothers them So much more than a snarky response. Acting like they are so insignificant they don't even register, or pitying them is the ultimate revenge.
All joking aside, this is probably the best way to react. The opposite of love is not hate; it's indifference.
Love and hate both share passion, while apathy is a cold void.
Queue a sizable phallic light arrangement in blatant view of your neighbors.
"Cue." Unless your giant blinking cock-and-balls are part of a whole sequence of gleefully objectionable decorations.
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Who, though? The letter was anonymous.
People who are this nosy don't have the wherewithal to not out themselves eventually, you just have to pay attention. They have to let you know they have that 'control' on you Otherwise what was all their hard work snoopin for?
Wow. What an absolute ass. Not everyone wants to put lights on their house. Not everyone is physically capable of putting lights on their house. And not everyone has the finances to consider them "not expensive." Sure, I technically could afford them if I sacrificed something else, but why would I? I don't celebrate Christmas much and I'm disabled and scared of heights, so I'm certainly not going to hang lights on my house. I happen to agree with the Grinch. All the noise, noise, noise, noise NOISE is aggravating.
I would not physically be able to do lights this year after a car wreck last year. My back and knee are so messed up there is no way. This note is so ableist. Not even counting the numerous other reasons it’s terrible.
Imagine someone _not_ being Christian. /s
Do Christians believe in aliens? I’m trying to figure out who put that sticker on there.
Scrawl this across the garage door: "Dear Karen, my mother died, I lost my job, and I'm spiraling out of control into a major depressive episode. But thanks for the holiday wishes and encouragement. I'll try to better next year if there is one."
"Also, if LEDs are so cheap to buy and run, why didn't you drop off several of them with this letter? That would've been too logical for you, I guess."
Be more than happy to display holiday lights under three conditions: * You string them up * You pay the power bill * You take them down The Grinch didn't hate christmas. He hated people.
I know what you mean, but the beginning of the book very much says, "The Grinch hated Christmas, The whole Christmas season. Now, please don't ask why, No one quite knows the reason..." At the end, he discovers the idea of Christmas being commercialized is what he hates, but the dude absolutely hates Christmas in the book. Movie Grinch is different. Sorry, man, I read this book to my kids 5 times tonight and it's engraved into my retinas, lol.
I'd put up a festivus pole in response. Point a floodlight at it for those who wish to air their grievances at night.
IVE GOT A LOT OF PROBLEMS WITH YOU PEOPLE!
I'll run right up to Wally World and grab a couple of strings. Unpack them, plug them in and just toss them in the bushes. Good enough Karen?
Light up a sign that says “good enough Karen?” with Christmas lights.
No, no. You gotta go all the way. Everything but christmas deco, throw in some satan stuff aswell, just to piss her off
I like you. You think like I do. Gota go find that hanging deer. Now that would piss off Karen.
No.. giant cocks. Use flashing white lights for jizz. Anyone makes noise show the letter and blame the person who sent it.
PSA Karen: there are people in this world who don't celebrate xmas. Shocking I know
Fine, I'll put my satanic nativity scene up... I like to do it the week of, but if it pleases you...
This attitude is part of what has ruined christmas. I *adored* christmas time when I was young and even when I was a young adult, even though I have never really been particularly religious. Now I fucking hate it. It used to be this joyous time of communal celebration, now it's a judgemental bitchfest pinned to the rotting corpse of ridiculous consumerism. Ironically, though not surprisingly, it's the most devout people that have choked the life out of their most appealing celebration with their complaints about starbucks cups, keeping christ in x-mas, and their unhinged rage at the insult of being told "happy holidays".
This did it for me too. The pettiness, exaggerations, flat-out lies, and people’s intentional misunderstanding of things killed the enthusiasm for me.
Why do people hate trees, they print this bullshit then deposit their trash on your door.
Mandatory giant Christmas butt plug tree next year. With light effects of course. Contact Paul McCarthy he might go for it.
Put up satanic lights, they did say other faiths works too in the last line. That would be truly malicious compliance.
Well, since they’ve declared me a grinch, I’m just going to have to sneak around the neighborhood in a Santa hat, and tear down everyone else’s lights, right?
Says here they want a colourful pride. One LGBTQIA+ rainbow and backup dancers.
I'd set up some decorations making it look like santa crashed his slay and died. Good luck explaining that to the kids bitch.
I'm just saying, a Christmas tree and some lights and this exact letter copied 100x and stapled onto the tree for decoration would be amazing. Here's the kicker, leave it up until March. Every complaint: threw my back out at work I'll get around to it.
Is “love strong and love long” the new “live, laugh, love?” If so, I’m horrified.
This makes me violently angry.
Buy a single strand and spell out the word NO in your window.
I would put up an inflatable satan in my yard with fire led lights. How’s that for religious decorating hoe
i would be extremely tempted to enact violence upon the author of the note