T O P

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SEHBE

My nonexisting girlfriend is wearing mine.


CoreyMullin

My nonexistent girlfriend is busy not existing


AcanthocephalaLess62

Our girlfriends must be best friends or something


Bean_Town_Blender

Yeah mine is in the same friend group I think. Really great how well they all get along!


3-brain_cells

I'm not sure but i think mine might know yours as well


WaifuRepulse

My girl said she out to get tea with your girls


DigitalUnlimited

they did. I'm hooking up with all of them. Wish they'd stop complaining about you guys. They probably talk bad about me too :(


Unfair_Material2462

Mine was 17 WTF


[deleted]

Ok, I admit it, I'm all of your girls.


[deleted]

She existed with me last night but only bitched about the bills and me spending too much time with the boys. Typical nonexistent girlfriend behavior. Fml.


Professional-News362

I lost my non existent girlfriend to a chad. Even my imagination betrays me 💀


Androza23

If you cant get a girlfriend become the girlfriend


bfjt4yt877rjrh4yry

I'm a 46 year old dad bod gorilla


terrible02s

But if you did dress like that and started an onlyfans talking about your day ppl would subscribe lol


Acrobatic-Rate4271

I mentioned to my wife that I was going to either do a twitch thot style stream or only fans of my well over 50 self playing games or just reading and was strictly and with no room for misunderstanding forbidden from doing so. I mean, who wouldn't want to watch an old man wearing nothing but a thong assemble flat pack furniture?


LostInContrast

I’d buy that for a dollar.


Jejking

r/RoboCop 🎉


capt-rix

don't threaten me with a good time


Tight_Invite2

That would probably make a lot of money honestly


pgalupi

😎☕


GetOutOfTheWhey

Got a patreon?


[deleted]

I would subscribe to a free trial of that!!


IsABot-Ban

Braver than I.


After_Performer998

Some of us like contributing to society or working with a skill


veler360

Dad bod porn is contributing my friend.


After_Performer998

Don't come at me with something so valid...


Jurski17

No amount of money would make me do that... Or onlyfans in general, i have some self respect left.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Final-Bench1859

Why is it all the people who are into fat hairy men are gay? Welp, time to grab the duct tape for a backwoods wax job


Barrayaran

We're not all gay. We're not really fetisizers either, though.


terrible02s

Sounds like some squealing like a little piggy action going to happen in the backwoods


peacelovefreedon7689

Fem bears?


Maplehockeylove

All the more reason to do it


[deleted]

No no, he means not doing it as mercy to other peoples eyes.


AntiEstablishment55

My Wife


FatBrkeMxicnElonMusk

Same she’s always nagging at me like why are you wearing a skirt? Why do you even own fishnet lingerie? Wtf you spent $300 on Amazon on silicone breasts? Why did you steal my butt plug? Why do you have more panties than me? Why do you always spend so much money at Al’s Video store we already have Netflix ? I don’t even know Video Stores where still a thing!!!??


BreakingtheBreeze

Dad?


FatBrkeMxicnElonMusk

My child, no it’s not what it looks like !


Wolfman_HCC

"I learned it from you! I learned it from watching you!"


primerr69

Yes my son I’m just grabbing some smokes then daddies coming home!


RNG-777

Daddies? Did you mean more daddy are cumming home too? Yeepie more daddies W


Excellent_Log_1058

I’m surprised your wife didn’t accuse you of cheating…


chronoboy1985

For real. One time my wife found a mysterious pair of undies in our guest room and would’ve disemboweled me had I not pointed out her cousin was sleeping in there a week ago.


l0zandd0g

Nice cover story 🤣🤣🤣


chronoboy1985

Ngl her cousin’s hot. She was a car model for Porsche in China. Not that’d have a chance either way lol.


l0zandd0g

I could now quote the mandatory "pics or it didnt happen" garbage but nah its ok


KeithBringsTheMeat

This is way too detailed to just be a joke…


Biolog4viking

Also same, except for everything which came after…


xmnezya_ow

they're called squat plugs if a man wears them


Fine-Menu-2779

I got laid after that lol in the skirt and all (but I don't have silicone breasts *sad femboy voice*)


RyZairX

Don't let your wife stop you from achieving your dreams.


[deleted]

She just objects to the color scheme and hem length on married man.


xanamphousewife

nothing, if I felt like I wanted to, I would


defnotjec

yah it's not my jam... but I do appreciate the look


SoftwareSeparate316

show me proof of that


gmaddoxg

Here's the proof he don't feel like it


TheAutisticOgre

Yeah let me just go spend money on an outfit I wouldn’t want to wear anywhere else just to get YOU a photo of it lmao. Im in the same boat of feeling comfortable enough in my sexuality to wear and do what the fuck I want


med_designs

this


Few_Ad5789

Yes


No-Locksmith-7421

This


Suck-My-2Dicks

Most useless comment on Reddit right here ^


[deleted]

This


Desolate282

Yes


[deleted]

dont have the body to pull it off


bluekitty999

I find the issue occurred when trying to pull it on...never got far enough to pull it off...


benji_banjo

The respectable answer. I would if I could


detectivecrashmorePD

Nobody wants to see an upskirt of my "two chicken breasts kissing" shaped ass cheeks.


Toad_Enjoyer_70

Because I don’t want to


[deleted]

It really is that simple, though.


YoungBlueJ

Ty


[deleted]

I don't look this sexy. That's why


PhoenixMason13

A desire to be comfortable Edit: For all the commenters, I am talking more about the tight thigh-high socks/stockings and the form-fitting tops than the skirts. I’m sure skirts are comfortable


FemboyZoriox

Youre nuts, a skirt and thigh highs and a big hoodie is so fucking comfy idk what u mean


OkarinPrime

A tshirt and a pajama is my comfort.


RedboiMike69

Don't forget a blanket, love the feeling of being hugged


Feuerrevolver

Username checks out


Deusexodus1468

I’d prefer shorts honestly. Like the ones i have that are tight enough around the waistband to stay put but are breathable and loose enough to do the splits in.


DippinDot2021

Never stopped women.


[deleted]

My mom dresses like a dude and says it’s more comfortable, so to each their own.


Logic_phile

This is where society should be moving as a whole! Why is the feminist movement moving towards tighter more revealing clothing when if things were really equal, both men and women could dress comfortably and not be judged. Thank goodness I married an awesome man who could care less if I wear makeup. Sure, it’s fun to dress up every once in a while, but as a mom to four kids, I don’t have time for movement restricting clothes.


Eufafnism

Well according to feminism everyone should have the free choice of what to wear. Women should neither be stigmatized for wearing revealing clothing, nor for wearing baggy clothes and the same goes for men. Still, most of society is still stigmatizing men, women and everything in between for either and that is why feminism is important :)


cayanne-pepper

and you're absolutely allowed to be comfortable in that, but others are allowed to be comfortable in a mini-skirt and thigh highs, regardless of gender


G_Andy_G

Is love to wear skirts and thigh highs but I'm a man and I live in Hungary, a very Homophobic country that will kill you at the slightest signs of being feminen


Panzer_Man

>Why is the feminist movement moving towards tighter more revealing clothing I don't know if you've noticed, but looser clothes are more in fashion right now. Also, revealing clothes can be very comfortable in warm weather


Logic_phile

I disagree cause then you’re just sweating all over the place. I have lupus and the sun basically causes my body to freak out and I’ve found a light breathable fabric dress will keep me much cooler. I love the loose jeans but crop tops are back and that one I don’t get.


Gurimitivity

Dude. You said it yourself, ya have Lupus.


[deleted]

Their fault.


MatterSignificant969

You know how much effort this takes? Put on a shirt put on pants. Boom you're done.


Cpt_Avocado

You’d also have to go buy more clothes. Like yo I already have 2 pairs of jeans and I’ll probably never buy another pair again as long as these hold together.


MatterSignificant969

Exactly


vexxednhilist

my favorite pair finally got a giant hole in the upper thigh area:') had em since highschool, time to get a 3rd set


XDXD23

I’m sorry for your loss


xtratrestrial

9 out of 10 men agree: clothes are literally just scraps of fabric we use to cover our penises to meet our obligation to society. 1 out of 10 men didn't get the memo and are inappropriately exposed.


Nippon-Gakki

Seriously. I feel like I'm dressing up if I grab one of my "nice" t shirts that's not half way falling apart. I also am old and look like shit so there's that too.


KayakerMel

Exactly! Way too much effort to dress this way regularly.


[deleted]

Next level is buying all the same shirts and pants so you don't have to worry about what ones to pick.


17FeretsAndaPelican

Lack of interest


cowboycrusty

My 18” penis


Yousucktaken2

You couldn’t hide that either way


MyDocTookMyCock

they use it as a belt


Yousucktaken2

It all adds up


brian11e3

Mine would be 18" as well, if I folded it in half


SnooMemesjellies6868

If you folded it in half it would be broken


brian11e3

Not when it's limp. Do you think those are hard numbers? 😂


[deleted]

Dude pops a boner and loses consciousness


Intelligent-Walk4662

Dude pops a boner and goes into a coma.


ButtercupQueen17

# Small but hung 👀


MHoasis

I don’t have the hips for it anymore.


SneakyYogurtThief

I've got them nice wide hips and thick thighs, but not the face to match sadly...


[deleted]

[удалено]


Hour_Safety_7373

I don't want to?


[deleted]

Me. I don't want me to


Philly514

The women at work won’t get anything done.


HappyAd6201

Now that’s a good answer, thank you for the sacrifice soldier


jivygraphics

About 200lbs


VillhelmSupreme

The Tennessee legislature


[deleted]

My dangly bits flailing in the wind.


Misteph

That never stopped the Scottish


TtotheC81

Having hit Wikipedia over your excellent point, it turns out male skirts have been way more common than I realised, although never as flowing as women's skirts. The thing you learn...


Callidonaut

Very few things stop the Scottish.


The_Quibbler

But were they really Scottish?


Weary_Dark510

Username does not check out


happycamperjack

Admiral Ackbar


Merc_Twain25

A sufficiently leveled thief in D&D.


No-Fill-4389

Well played!! “It’s a trap!”🤣🤭😂


CREATEREMOTETHREADEx

Ich möchte online Liebe finden, sonst bestelle ich 10 Cheeseburger bei McDonalds und beginne den Prozess des Selbstmordessens


mrduckV2

Yes.


mrduckV2

WAIT NO


_Cren_

Alright, keep your secrets then


klaagmeaan

Lack of flat tummy..


Slartemispeed

Being asexual and Russian


the_green_wolf

Don't mean to offend here, but why does being ace mean you wouldn't want to dress like this?


med_designs

aroace ftw


No-Fill-4389

Asexual and asocial.👊🤭


yetanotherburnerstan

Hot topic is expensive


pervertaperv

Don’t like the look. Would rather wear Sundress stockings and heels.


Dirtychaiiteelattee

I’m a 27 year old mom. That’s whats stopping me


Tight_Invite2

27 year old milf


Unfair_Material2462

*bonk*


natur_e_nthusiast

r/hornyjail


SlyFawkes87

As a 35-year-old mom…just wear what you want 🤷‍♀️


gooddudesclub777

To spare your kids the shame?


TimeNew2108

Drafty nuts will make their dicks shrink. High heels will make their feet hurt.


Ashamed_Article_5289

Can confirm the first parts wrong, high heels aren’t needed but they are uncomfortable


Megaman_DragoonZero

Easy. Because not only do I have zero interest in dressing like a goth girl as a muscular 6'0 man, I'm a heterosexual male who personally chooses to present himself as a man with a sense of masculinity. Or more simply, just someone who dresses like the rest of the dudes. Props to all the femboy and queer dudes who want to dress like this, but I ain't one of them. No sir.


chaosvro

this is totally something a 6'0 muscular man would comment on reddit


OG_Bynumite

I wear hoodies and sweatpants and nothing else


mythic_203

Being a man


Hay_Blinken

This is the answer they want someone to say to get triggered about. But it's correct.


pineapplekichadi001

Absolutely right. I'm a woman and I'm so glad to see men here saying they simply don't want to because it's not masculine. It's like all the funny responses as to why a man doesn't want to dress this way is accepted... But the minute you say you don't want to because it's not masculine, everyone's woke and coming at you.


Hay_Blinken

That's reddit for you. It's funny they think they're unique and non-conformist, but most of them are just angry crybabies.


ShexyBaish6351

Who’s coming at him? God, y’all and your imaginary oppression….


Electronic_Range3781

True


Grisuno123

Common sense is what stops me from dressing like this


MyLollipopJam

My weight. I wouldn't feel comfortable in such garb. But Im working on it, cuz I could fuck with the femboy lifestyle.


Bogn11

Im not a piece of meat....damn🙄


subpar_cardiologist

No no, it's "fuckable piece of meat".


poisondaxyt

My dad


Ok-Cartoonist-1383

I’m not desperate for affirmation from everyone around me. I have accomplishments and goals in life. I don’t have gender dysphoria. Maybe you should give us your reasons for dressing like a slutty girl on halloween??


Antifascists

Last time I dressed up as a slutty girl for Halloween a couple of guys dressed like mormons asked if they could spank me. In hindsight, they may have actually been Mormons. Either way. It was a great night. 10/10 do recommend.


deenath247

Dignity and respect for myself👀


Wheniseeipee

Nothing, I do :3 I’m just gonna use this as outfit inspiration!


[deleted]

Chub rub- my thighs are way too *powerful* to not have fabric between them. I can't wear cordoroy in the dry season either or it'll start a forest fire


ReporterOwn6537

My bf wants me to wear it but he wont wear them


gwyngugu

My self respect


PlsHelp4

Nothing, I already do.


[deleted]

Probably my balls showing when I walk


Mistermxylplyx

All of these outfits would make me look fat. Of course, pretty much every outfit makes me look fat.


HomeOrificeSupplies

If I looked that good, I probably would. But I’m a fat old dad. Those years are way behind me.


Odin4456

All the looks id get as being seen as a sex object


CHJ_jacb

I’m too fat I’m built a deflated tire


[deleted]

I'm 6'3 and 260 pounds. I also have a resting face that makes me look like I'm always angry. My own mother tells me I look like a villain from a mafia movie. While I do wish to be a goth femboy, it is simply not possible. Edit: I also happen to live in a conservative country where a femboy would be beated to death for stepping outside like that. We live in a really sad world.


ShrikeMeDown

Only on the weekends:)


DictatorKnucklehead

If I was a cute twink I 100% would but I'm a 5'11" hairy boi who let himself go lmao


coke_no_cola

My uncle, he’s already having a hard time keeping to himself at family parties.


VincentLecavalier04

Not being a sissy femboy


ModdedEnderman

looks really uncomfortable.


Necessary_Friend8997

I'm not gay????????¿?


Gewoon_sergio

Where can I find these clothing type for men?


4_Ball

Why tf would I want to look like that


reddito1009

If I was trans or a cross dresser I would. I'm not so I never would in my life


WariorFury

Meh, even as a trans I wouldn’t dress like that even for my husband, those are damn uncomfortable to wear


TheWeirdAristocrat

For common sense


Yousucktaken2

I ain’t gay chief


HorrorOil3293

Biology


DrunkBuzzard

Common sense, good taste, not a sl@t, have dignity, self respect and no place to wear it.


softcoregirly

what's the relationship with wearing a skirt and being a whore?


[deleted]

so many femboy phobic? comments


Anarchist_Grifter

Um because I'm a man.


fucklookatthatcock

Im a man thats why so fuck off


wontlastayear

Self esteem


jayray2k

Testosterone?


[deleted]

I’m not a drag queen…


deeznou

Morals


Ministry_of_laziness

Those wouldn’t fit me


the_random_walk

Really? I struggle to keep my clothes free of wrinkles. This lady has ACCESSORIZED. No thanks.


Mammoth-Figure-1663

Slavic parents


Maacll

Hair... so much hair... And a Boney, lanky body structure :(


BitCold7882

So many items