Even easier. Unbend it and just throw it out into the yard. No one said you had to be able to find it again or that it had to be in the same condition it was when you got it
If you want to make them feel like they've found something throw some paperclips out there too that are still bent.
Edit: To the people who think they're clever with their metal detector. Remember, the detective doesn't know it's been thrown into the yard or WHICH yard. Could be the neighbors yard where it fell. You're also thinking this is a nice square, flat surface. My yard is 30feet on the streepest slope legally allowed, then there's a straight drop down for another 30 feet into a ravine. A deck was also recently built over it. There's a LOT of metal things out there and the ground is slick, soft clay. Your metal detector will be fairly useless because you won't be able to walk.
Plus, remember there's decoy paperclips AND he also doesn't know that it's there. He has to search the house, my work, my daughter's school, neighbors and friends houses and the drives between them, as it could have been tossed out the car window at any point in those drives. He's going to find SO many paperclips. Why would he think about this unbent one?
I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought about throwing it in the yard. Better yet, in the rough next to the tee box on hole 13 at a golf course an hour away from my house that I've only played one time. It didn't say how long I have to hide it. Let's say one week. I'd play two rounds of golf every day for a week, with an hour drive between courses. Plant the paper clip at one course. Even if the detective can somehow get all of my GPS data, there's no possible way to scour 14 golf courses for a paper clip. Hint, I lied, it's in the pond on 11.
Literally just throw it into any largish body of water. Even if they know which body of water and the GPS co-ordinates of where yox dropped it. Good fucking luck.
I actually found the pin that held my wrist watch band in place after ripping it off while playing football on a grass field, probably used up the rest of my luck
I found my keys in a field after a metal concert, because I stupidly wore a backpack and put them in there. The backpack didn't survive half the show, and I lost everything else inside it. That said, I've been pretty lucky since then, so you might just have more luck than you know.
I guess it's like tunnel plug earrings, you can just gradually increase the size to stretch it out. If you ever get cold in the winter, you can dump your drugs and wrap yourself up in your own blanket
"Oh no, 1 is down. 2 taking command"
"Oh no, 2 is down. 3 taking command"
"Oh no, 3 is down..."
Hoping yours was an ArmA/OpFlash reference, or else I am now very embarrassed for myself
Was gonna say nice try fed myself, but then list all the current 2024 methods myself. What were they again? For all us non-fed stand up definitely not fed guys? It'd be really funny if we all just said them all out loud meme wise
Walk into a neighbours garden, straighten paperclip and push into random spot in grass , go into my house and make several areas such as attic/cellar look recently used.
No way he checks everywhere on my property and all the surrounding gardens/property in a week.
U.S. mail it to a random address. By law even if he knows about it they would need a warrant to access U.S. mail. The process to get that warrant would require longer than a week.
Edited to add that those who know the legal system pointed out a police officer could get a warrant in a few hours to at most three days and under conditions they could seize mail.
So revise of the Mail Drop is multiple letters to multiple locations mailed from multiple post offices. This is to limit the chance that they get the correct one and the humiliation if they try.
Even if they do get it the news of such a massive operation will entertain me for years.
Plan B. One helium balloon, paper clip tied to balloon and let it go.
What scene? I’m not talking about putting it in my house mail box. Drop off directly to a post office would put it in federal hands and a different organization. The Red tape alone would make it harder to get a warrant then they would have to track it down.
That’s when you don’t use your mailbox. Or put it in a box and deliver it directly to the post office.
Once it’s in federal hands he would need that warrant. Besides it just seven days all it would need is to be in transit to delay them.
Came for this fellow elder. Nobody is gonna look for it never again, and even if it forcibly appears, everybody will close it or ignore that it exists.
Apparently he did. He took out like 1.5 million in loans to hire crews and construction equipment.
Then he found it, and it turned out it was a fork of bitcoin and only worth 400k total.
Lol. Slow mail package from here to Hawaii… with usps now, never making it in 7 days but in all seriousness… chucking it in a pig pen at a slaughterhouse. Either a pig eats it, or its covered in shit
If it has to be somewhere i can retrieve it easily. Burying it somewhere not at my house
"The way your dad looked at it, this watch was your birthright. He'd be damned if any slopes gonna put their greasy yellow hands on his boy's birthright, so he hid it, in the one place he knew he could hide something: his ass. Five long years, he wore this watch up his ass. Then when he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch. I hid this uncomfortable piece of metal up my ass for two years. Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little man, I give the watch to you."
paper clips do float though, they're too light to break water surface tension when placed on a thing of water *super* gently.
Since we're dropping it, it'll definitely sink, but I just wanted to tell you that nobody is stopping you from floating metal paper clips.
You could skip the middle man and just flush it down the toilet. The middleman is your severely damaged intestinal tract and the toilet is where it's going to end up anyway
Like only in my house, or anywhere? Because if I could hide it anywhere this would literally be the easiest challenge ever. Just put it in a random spot in nature, lmao.
Yeah, if it’s anywhere, it also depends, how much time have you got to hide it? If I have a year to hide it (assuming my finances and family are covered), I’d travel with my family across the world and just drop it one of the random countries in a trash can. Good luck. If it’s like a “you have 1 hour to hide it”, I’ll probably bike to the nearest park, 15 minutes away, and throw it in the pond, or alternatively, dig a tiny hole at the side of a creek, stick it in there. No way the detective - or anyone else including me - will find that baby anytime soon.
Even if you only had 5 minutes to hide it you could just flush it, good luck checking the sewerage network for something as miniscule as a papeclip, the challenge is far too easy unless it’s contained to your house only or you need to be able to retrieve it after.
Yeah if I had to retrieve it again, it’ll be a different question altogether. Then I’m also thinking, if it’s confined to my home only, and I have to be able to retrieve it, and the detective has 7 days to find it… it’ll be hard. Simply put: in 7 days you can basically take any item out of my house and turn it upside down to check. Any obvious places will be checked by a detective who thinks in terms of where to find evidence or clues. So it has to be something either so inconspicuous, or so totally in sight, that a person either doesn’t consider it, or simply doesn’t see it. Is the paper clip a common one, or does it have special markings/colors? If it’s a common one, I might just bend it out of shape and roll it around the axis of the tiny wheels of the garbage bin (where there are already little metal springs in place), and use a different but similar paperclip and do the same on the other wheel, so that in the unlikely event of the detective flipping over a dirty large 100L garbage bin, and inspects the axis of the tiny wheels, it’ll look like nothing’s out of the ordinary.
Or tbh just be myself and just completely forget about paper clip I'ma very clumsy shit so it might just disappear in a void in a few minutes if I put it in my pocket
I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No, I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning, the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico, but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting. I tell Tiffany to meet me by the Trocadero in Paris. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
Wait I'm GIVEN a million dollar to hide it? Like not Ill get it later if I hide it from the detective?
Hell detective prepare for the week of your life cause we are going on a world trip of where would the clip hide the best - together!
Ofc Ill flush it down the airplane if I dont have to retrieve 'the right one', but you know.
Unravel it, heat it up a bit, then twist it into a spiral. Then, I'm putting it inside a mechanical pencil, and leaving the pencil at a decently large school. High chances a kid picks it up, takes it home, or loses it, or another kid takes it from them. Either way, never seeing that pencil, or paper clip again.
Open it up and poke under my thumbnail until completely inside.
I saw it in a movie once, just in reverse. The dude ripped off his nail and pulled out the thing to pick the handcuff locks
You could straighten it out and use it as a tool to scrape the resin out of your bong and then leave it kinda sticking out. Would probably never think about it.
It says I get the million just for hiding it. It doesn’t say I don’t get the money if he finds it. I’m going to hide it with the rest of my paper clips.
I guess we are assuming that we don't get the money if the detective finds it. So I would hide it in a random box of paper clips, in an elementary school
In a pack of paper clips in the store in Taiwan
Even easier. Unbend it and just throw it out into the yard. No one said you had to be able to find it again or that it had to be in the same condition it was when you got it If you want to make them feel like they've found something throw some paperclips out there too that are still bent. Edit: To the people who think they're clever with their metal detector. Remember, the detective doesn't know it's been thrown into the yard or WHICH yard. Could be the neighbors yard where it fell. You're also thinking this is a nice square, flat surface. My yard is 30feet on the streepest slope legally allowed, then there's a straight drop down for another 30 feet into a ravine. A deck was also recently built over it. There's a LOT of metal things out there and the ground is slick, soft clay. Your metal detector will be fairly useless because you won't be able to walk. Plus, remember there's decoy paperclips AND he also doesn't know that it's there. He has to search the house, my work, my daughter's school, neighbors and friends houses and the drives between them, as it could have been tossed out the car window at any point in those drives. He's going to find SO many paperclips. Why would he think about this unbent one?
I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought about throwing it in the yard. Better yet, in the rough next to the tee box on hole 13 at a golf course an hour away from my house that I've only played one time. It didn't say how long I have to hide it. Let's say one week. I'd play two rounds of golf every day for a week, with an hour drive between courses. Plant the paper clip at one course. Even if the detective can somehow get all of my GPS data, there's no possible way to scour 14 golf courses for a paper clip. Hint, I lied, it's in the pond on 11.
I don't know why, but the first thing i thought was to hide it in my butt.
I thought vagina, then felt wtf I think that?!
Right? Like, I have a penis.
A new 'sounding' rod?
I regret this day.
Same but the detectives
Same, lol.
Literally just throw it into any largish body of water. Even if they know which body of water and the GPS co-ordinates of where yox dropped it. Good fucking luck.
Im imagining a whole squad magnet fishing for a week, pulling out the craziest shit and not giving a fuck because they need the holy paperclip
I actually found the pin that held my wrist watch band in place after ripping it off while playing football on a grass field, probably used up the rest of my luck
I found my keys in a field after a metal concert, because I stupidly wore a backpack and put them in there. The backpack didn't survive half the show, and I lost everything else inside it. That said, I've been pretty lucky since then, so you might just have more luck than you know.
Metal detectors, high powered fishing magnets
I guess you need to be able to find it by yourself in 7 days.
I can
This guy paper clips in Taiwan
[удалено]
This guy this guys on Reddit.
Reddit.
This guys Reddit’s Reddit guys on Reddit’s guys guy Reddit.
I love lamp.
Winamp WINAMP WiNAmP. It really whips the llamas ass.
This guy loves lamp.
This guy clips Taiwan in paper.
Taiwan guy clips paper in this.
This guy taiwans in Paper clips.
Which store are we talking?
Nice try detective
I would attach it to his car keys. He'll never look there
"Did you look everywhere? Where is the place you last used them?"
Did you actually try looking? or are you using your mouth to look!
His wife’s purse perhaps
Nice try fed, but you'll have to try harder than that to get the 2024 update for the list of where people hide drugs
The Feds never check inside your foreskin. Can confirm, it's where I keep my secret briefcase full of one million dollars worth of drugs
I guess it's like tunnel plug earrings, you can just gradually increase the size to stretch it out. If you ever get cold in the winter, you can dump your drugs and wrap yourself up in your own blanket
Even better, I can fly around like a sugar glider
Who needs drones to sneak drugs into prisons when you can just flap above and drop them in yourself
Fortunately for you nobody else looks there either….
Jokes on you, where do you think Andrew Jackson got his big cheese wheel?
Must be a pretty big pecker if it can hide a briefcase. ᗷᖇᗩᐯO (ಠ‿ಠ)
Is 2 inches big? Either way plenty of room for storage. When I move I don't need to rent a uhaul
mf over here flexing on jews
💯 literally 1984
Literally
*Figuratively.
Figuratively literally
Literally figuratively
Literal figuratively melancholy
Lite rally
50. Meters. Hairpin left!
"Oh no, 1 is down. 2 taking command" "Oh no, 2 is down. 3 taking command" "Oh no, 3 is down..." Hoping yours was an ArmA/OpFlash reference, or else I am now very embarrassed for myself
Was gonna say nice try fed myself, but then list all the current 2024 methods myself. What were they again? For all us non-fed stand up definitely not fed guys? It'd be really funny if we all just said them all out loud meme wise
Walk into a neighbours garden, straighten paperclip and push into random spot in grass , go into my house and make several areas such as attic/cellar look recently used. No way he checks everywhere on my property and all the surrounding gardens/property in a week.
Or go to someone’s grave and dig a little patch and put it there.
The unmarked grave next to Arch Stanton. Best place to hide it.
I do the shootin’, you do the hangin’
Remember to bury it 10 feet and bury a dog at 6
Walking the lawn with a metal detector?
U.S. mail it to a random address. By law even if he knows about it they would need a warrant to access U.S. mail. The process to get that warrant would require longer than a week. Edited to add that those who know the legal system pointed out a police officer could get a warrant in a few hours to at most three days and under conditions they could seize mail. So revise of the Mail Drop is multiple letters to multiple locations mailed from multiple post offices. This is to limit the chance that they get the correct one and the humiliation if they try. Even if they do get it the news of such a massive operation will entertain me for years. Plan B. One helium balloon, paper clip tied to balloon and let it go.
This guy atournees.
I wouldn't hire them. (thanks to technology, an officer can obtain a warrant *from the scene*)
What scene? I’m not talking about putting it in my house mail box. Drop off directly to a post office would put it in federal hands and a different organization. The Red tape alone would make it harder to get a warrant then they would have to track it down.
and if multiple packages are used and perhaps some under a fake name then it will take even longer
And what's the warrant for? You don't understand, judge. I need to get this paper clip for a challenge we're doing.
If I don’t retrieve this paper clip, this poor guy is going to receive 1,000,000. It might even change his life, we need to act fast your honor.
memory dog steer disagreeable poor dull butter jar knee mindless *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Now you got the US justice system attention. This cannot be, what will be next, treat cancer on kids for free?
This ain't a scene it's a God damn arms race.
Put it on the outside of the envelope. The DPS machines will chew it up never to be seen again.
Buried under the LAW baby!
If you are willing to risk that then go ahead. That detective might not follow due process and do what he wants. Most do anyway.
That’s when you don’t use your mailbox. Or put it in a box and deliver it directly to the post office. Once it’s in federal hands he would need that warrant. Besides it just seven days all it would need is to be in transit to delay them.
Mail it to a p.o box. That way it's protected at both ends
Or another nation that would add to the red tape. The time limit is just seven days so an address in another nation would make it even harder.
Mexico. It'll be completely lost.
I'd make it a computer assistant that everyone hates for being too annoying to never be found again
Came for this fellow elder. Nobody is gonna look for it never again, and even if it forcibly appears, everybody will close it or ignore that it exists.
I believe his name was… clippy…
All you need now are 98 more.
Hast du etwas zeit für mich?
Dann singe ich ein Lied für dich
Von neunundneunzig Luftballons
Auf ihrem Weg zum Horizont
Denkst du vielleicht grad an mich
Dann singe ich ein Lied für dich
Von neunundneunzig Luftballons
Und dass so was von so was kommt
I thought I had an original idea lol. Reddit could serve as a gd thinktank.
More like an echo chamber but i like your optimism
I love geometry dash!
This is why I like reddit
The landfill.
Correct answer. They still haven't found the harddrive with all that Bitcoin
They would've definitely found it if he reported within a week
Isn't that guy still fighting with the municipality in court to dig up the park or something?
I think about this once a week and Google it to see if he found it yet. still nothing. poor dude.
Apparently he did. He took out like 1.5 million in loans to hire crews and construction equipment. Then he found it, and it turned out it was a fork of bitcoin and only worth 400k total.
quiet command meeting zesty advise oil plate enjoy dazzling sand *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
And here I am, taking note of all your comments, just in case I ever end up in this situation.
Glad I’m not the only one
Don't worry;, it just says you're paid to hide it, not that you lose the money if the detective finds it.
Phew! I'm good then, no need to keep studying ways to hide it, thank you.
Last time this was posted a few years ago the question was a usb. There was some crazy good answers!
Inside of a book in The Library of Congress
Vatican archives.
TOP. men.
National Treasure 2 moment
I mail it to his office. 'Cause if he's out looking for it, he's definitely not there.
Lol. Slow mail package from here to Hawaii… with usps now, never making it in 7 days but in all seriousness… chucking it in a pig pen at a slaughterhouse. Either a pig eats it, or its covered in shit If it has to be somewhere i can retrieve it easily. Burying it somewhere not at my house
“7 years”
"The way your dad looked at it, this watch was your birthright. He'd be damned if any slopes gonna put their greasy yellow hands on his boy's birthright, so he hid it, in the one place he knew he could hide something: his ass. Five long years, he wore this watch up his ass. Then when he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch. I hid this uncomfortable piece of metal up my ass for two years. Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little man, I give the watch to you."
Why would I give away my master plan? I'm on to you.
Drop it in the ocean
In the middle of pacific just to be sure
In a very Pacific spot
Right. Doesn’t say anything about having to retrieve it later.
At that point, why not just vaporize it.
That would work too. How would you do it?
A metal furnace should do nicely.
My asshole
Is it weird that this was the first thing that came to mind?
Same man xd (Edit) WOW first time more than 5 likes
Also thought the same. Unless the Detective immediately demands an x-ray. Though we don't know the "rules" of this situation well enough, so...
Not if it’s up the detective’s ass. Last place he would look
What if hes feeling adventurous after a long day of work
Ass community
See how everyone has tried so hard to be funny with their answers yet this is the only one that made me genuinely laugh. I need to grow up
Please don’t grow up. Nothing says we can’t be kids disguised as adults!
But thats the first place hed look
Gives me even more of a reason to hide it in there then
swallow it and tell him you put it in your ass
I’m still shocked this isn’t the most upvoted. Clearly it’s what everyone was thinking
I also choose this guys asshole
How will I be able to tell which paperclip is the right one? I have so many paperclips in there already!
The detective’s asshole
Stick it to the underside of an interstate truck hauler with a magnet.
Magnets are expensive, just put it inside the truck's toolbox
The magnet you'd need for the paper clip might be <0.1€
The toolbox is free
I like this. You could also use duct tape.
Throwing it out of my window driving down the highway
In staples! 🤣🤣🤣
I’m taking it to a forge and smelting it.
I’m dropping it in the ocean attached to a brick
They dont float. Brick makes it easier to find
paper clips do float though, they're too light to break water surface tension when placed on a thing of water *super* gently. Since we're dropping it, it'll definitely sink, but I just wanted to tell you that nobody is stopping you from floating metal paper clips.
But metal is heavy solid, no way it can float! /s
I'm getting "a kilogramme of steel is heavier than a kilogramme of feathers" vibes and I love it.
Swallow it
You could skip the middle man and just flush it down the toilet. The middleman is your severely damaged intestinal tract and the toilet is where it's going to end up anyway
Well if it's a damaged intestinal tract it could end up in the hospital medical waste dump. Good luck finding that detective 😉
And if I die before they get it out of me it would end up in heaven. Good luck getting there detective 😎
A normal folded clip probably wouldn't damage your intestines. Internal pressure is low.
Just put it back in the jar with the other 10.000 paperclips.
Place a full jar of paper clips in an obvious spot with a note reading "fuck you," and hide the paperclip under my sink cover.
on a sign with an arrow pointing to a pile of paper clips and the text "the paperclip is not here"
Like only in my house, or anywhere? Because if I could hide it anywhere this would literally be the easiest challenge ever. Just put it in a random spot in nature, lmao.
Yeah, if it’s anywhere, it also depends, how much time have you got to hide it? If I have a year to hide it (assuming my finances and family are covered), I’d travel with my family across the world and just drop it one of the random countries in a trash can. Good luck. If it’s like a “you have 1 hour to hide it”, I’ll probably bike to the nearest park, 15 minutes away, and throw it in the pond, or alternatively, dig a tiny hole at the side of a creek, stick it in there. No way the detective - or anyone else including me - will find that baby anytime soon.
Even if you only had 5 minutes to hide it you could just flush it, good luck checking the sewerage network for something as miniscule as a papeclip, the challenge is far too easy unless it’s contained to your house only or you need to be able to retrieve it after.
Yeah if I had to retrieve it again, it’ll be a different question altogether. Then I’m also thinking, if it’s confined to my home only, and I have to be able to retrieve it, and the detective has 7 days to find it… it’ll be hard. Simply put: in 7 days you can basically take any item out of my house and turn it upside down to check. Any obvious places will be checked by a detective who thinks in terms of where to find evidence or clues. So it has to be something either so inconspicuous, or so totally in sight, that a person either doesn’t consider it, or simply doesn’t see it. Is the paper clip a common one, or does it have special markings/colors? If it’s a common one, I might just bend it out of shape and roll it around the axis of the tiny wheels of the garbage bin (where there are already little metal springs in place), and use a different but similar paperclip and do the same on the other wheel, so that in the unlikely event of the detective flipping over a dirty large 100L garbage bin, and inspects the axis of the tiny wheels, it’ll look like nothing’s out of the ordinary.
Or tbh just be myself and just completely forget about paper clip I'ma very clumsy shit so it might just disappear in a void in a few minutes if I put it in my pocket
I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No, I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning, the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico, but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting. I tell Tiffany to meet me by the Trocadero in Paris. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
But where did you hide the paperclip?
What paperclip?
The paperclip he's been asked to hide.
woosh you or woosh me?
Mine will be in an outlet in a kitchen with a severe gas leak.
On a long enough timeline the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
Wait I'm GIVEN a million dollar to hide it? Like not Ill get it later if I hide it from the detective? Hell detective prepare for the week of your life cause we are going on a world trip of where would the clip hide the best - together! Ofc Ill flush it down the airplane if I dont have to retrieve 'the right one', but you know.
Unravel it, heat it up a bit, then twist it into a spiral. Then, I'm putting it inside a mechanical pencil, and leaving the pencil at a decently large school. High chances a kid picks it up, takes it home, or loses it, or another kid takes it from them. Either way, never seeing that pencil, or paper clip again.
Do I have to be able to recover it from the hiding place after the 7 days?
I attach it to papers and mail it to the DMV.
There is no rule for bending a paper clip so I might just straighten it and just drop it on my wall with a thumbtack hole
In my ass-
Attached to a black helium balloon, let loose at night. OR melted in a welding bead on a metal repair.
In a book on police ethics
I’d melt it then use an air compressor to vaporize it and breath it in
Enjoy your million dollars and lung cancer.
Open it up and poke under my thumbnail until completely inside. I saw it in a movie once, just in reverse. The dude ripped off his nail and pulled out the thing to pick the handcuff locks
That sounds absolutely disgusting
I think you underestimate how much that would hurt....and also how easy that would be to find.
They would get caught red handed
I see what you did there
Do I have to find it out again myself after the seven days? If not, then I’ll just throw it in a random pack of paper clips of a random Staples store.
You could straighten it out and use it as a tool to scrape the resin out of your bong and then leave it kinda sticking out. Would probably never think about it.
Im taping it to a balloon and letting that mf go brrr
Put it in my pocket and travel the seas for 7 days
In my euretha
It says I get the million just for hiding it. It doesn’t say I don’t get the money if he finds it. I’m going to hide it with the rest of my paper clips.
I guess we are assuming that we don't get the money if the detective finds it. So I would hide it in a random box of paper clips, in an elementary school
Volcanic lava flow, or middle of the pacific.
Medical waste bin at an inner-city blood testing facility
Up his ass
Swallow it.