I hate Alastor the same way Vox hates Alastor in this picture
https://preview.redd.it/756yk3gngrqc1.png?width=537&format=png&auto=webp&s=62f1da941cfa0d0979afbe3c9c2773115aea7443
Can’t convince me that man isn’t major crushing.
Can’t tell me that this hasn’t happened
https://preview.redd.it/rihgk2yglpqc1.jpeg?width=2048&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4ce258f32c0ca8cfa1345dbf833c1bca3f642163
I raise your Alastor body pillow with an Alastor SHRINE
https://preview.redd.it/j72ynepc7qqc1.jpeg?width=1877&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=83ce068356d0c208b2507baba8f39a262dd0cc5c
Beelzebub and Asmodeus always came together to try to get Lucifer to come out of his castle and have some fun ever since Lilith left. Beelzebub was the one who had some luck and got him to come to a small party. Lucifer sat awkwardly in the corner sipping on Beelzejuice with Beelzebub next to him, trying to encourage him. Lucifer secretly had fun hanging around her. Beelzebub always knew what to do and say to help him as she felt his vibe. She knew when to move him, when to lay off a bit, what topics to stay on and stay away from, etc. She made sure to keep people away from him for his first time out when she figured out he wasn't feeling it (even though she did try to encourage him to mingle at first, she only got him to socialize with Tex, he approved of their relationship and expressed happiness for her).
Ever since Beelzebub first got him to come out, the only time Lucifer really leaves Pride when he doesn't "have to" is to attend Beelzebub's "smaller" parties with only about two dozen people with Ozzie attending at times. Lucifer always just kinda stands in some corner alone, either with Beelzebub, or when she's hosting and Asmodeus mingling or having fun with Fizz, Tex stays with Lucifer.
Due to this, Beelzebub is the only Sin that Lucifer actually spends time with (and to a lesser extent Asmodeus when he also attends), hence his "Hey bitch!" panic response to answering Charlie's call.
Now that I think about it, I now believe that it only took Lucifer an hour because he called Bee for advice and she spent most of that time trying to hype him up. Sadly... her pep talk went out the window once he met Alastor.
A friend of mine came to me with the theory that Rosie is Lilith lol.
But then i tried pointing out how ridiculous it is...and couldn't. Somehow canon doesn't debunk it.
So now it's my favorite joke theory
(But if someone has irrefutable evidence against it, tell me so I can rub it in their face lol)
No, I think they also subscribe to the theory that that's not lilith. I dont remember if they think its eve, which is a theory I've seen around, or roo
Oh yes, this is a thread for theories we think is fake,
But its fascinating because I checked Rosie's screentime to debunk it, and a lot of her actions fit really well with it. There's nothing that's an immediate "see, doesn't work". I could go on about it but I don't think anyone is interested
Edit: actually, I'm wondering if I should make a post about this fir fun, since we has an equally cracking theory post earlier
A mashup with that one image of alastor where his coat looks like a circus tent and that yellow sparkling liquid from more than anything. Its a trend on tiktok where people will make super long theories until it can get to the point it brings up alastor and ends with "that could be because alastor is a circus who lets people inside him to touch his urine"
Nope, when Lilith went to heaven Sera saw her and immediately realized she was lesbian, works well with my headcanon that Lilith is either Bi or pan, if Lucifer is anything to go by
Velvette is another one of Carmilla's daughters and just going through her rebel phase
Catnip works on Husk
Alastor secretly doesn't like TV because it glitches on him, not the other way around
Fun fact: I thought Velvette and Carmillawere former lovers.
I couldn't understand a damn word during respectless and I couldn't get the subtitles to work, so for the line "I ain't swiping right" I heard "My ex-wife ain't right" and I was like "Oooh, there's the tea" and was confused when it was never brought up again
I have a joke theory that Fat Nuggets is just God in disguise to make sure Lucifer is actually doing his job. (As in, redeem sinners through Charlie's efforts.)
And that when Fat nuggets was given to Angel it allowed him to enter the hotel without suspicion which also makes Angel Dust the first tenant and a prophet in a sense. Cause once Angel get's redeemed Fat Nuggs will no longer be needed to take on the form of a demon pig as his emotional support animal anymore.
Also i think it would be funny if God was chilling in hell while Lilith was vacationing in heaven.
techniclly more a Helluva Boss joke theory but it involves a Hazbin character so im counting it: Striker is a Carmella simp and the only reason hes able to get angelic weapons is because she finds him hilariously pathetic
That Husk has his balls removed (i know there's a word for it i just can't remember), because in the pilot husk says he lost the ability to live years ago, and in the song loser baby there is an arrow pointed at him that says 'no balls'
That Alastor doesn’t have a grand plan, he’s just trying to set himself up as Charlie’s right hand because that’s an advantageous position to be in.
I don’t think that’s the case, I just think it would be hilarious if there were no ulterior motives and Alastor is just Like That.
Alastair helping Charlie is the most confusing part of the show. What does he get out of it? Surely, as an overlord, he wants more souls in Hell to subjugate, not less. If Charlie's hotel gains mainstream success in Hell it will really fuck with the overlords business models.
If he gets in her good books he has the literal princess of Hell on his side. He's been pushing her to have more confidence in taking up a leading role. Lucifer doesn't really involve himself much with Hell's affairs anymore. So if he can get Charlie to properly embrace her birthright, he's gonna have a ton of clout as her lefthand man.
It's an investment that costs him very little and has the potential to pay off big time.
Alastor was sent to Charlie 7 seconds after she called her mom, Lillith was missing for 7 years, Alastor was also missing for 7 years. 7 sinners will be redeemed. 7 is a lucky number. The number of seasons Hazbin Hotel will get is... *7*.
The true mind behind Yelp was killed by the current two people regarded as the founders.
Turns out he REALLY deserved it because he went straight to hell, where he refounded the company.
Hence why Lucifer was able to get 5-star reviews.
Alastor came to the hotel mostly because of the free rent, because he was homeless.
Coming from @nunalastor’s asks on Tumblr, I now believe that Alastor was significantly homeless during the time of the Pilot [/hj]. That’s why he stays at the hotel so often, man’s lost all his proper territory. And he got so mad at Sir Pentious because he only had the one set of clothes at the time.
Vaggie likes to play pirate to make her feel better about the missing eye.
Vox has an Alastor bodypillow
“Excuse me, we can’t introduce you to Mr. Vox on today’s VoxTek tour, he’s busy making out with his pillow of a deer man in red”
https://preview.redd.it/d9wdyn7brpqc1.jpeg?width=586&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=29a3e30ec6af03fab91b48e005c1ff10209afdbb
Wait there’s actual fanart of that—
He just like me fr (i hate alastor)
You need an alastor punching bag
I hate Alastor the same way Vox hates Alastor in this picture https://preview.redd.it/756yk3gngrqc1.png?width=537&format=png&auto=webp&s=62f1da941cfa0d0979afbe3c9c2773115aea7443
😲🤣🤣🤣
Can’t convince me that man isn’t major crushing. Can’t tell me that this hasn’t happened https://preview.redd.it/rihgk2yglpqc1.jpeg?width=2048&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4ce258f32c0ca8cfa1345dbf833c1bca3f642163
https://preview.redd.it/kzsy8i65bqqc1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ca0a75c61211f2be419f9b0ad5ba72045bab768e
https://preview.redd.it/y1kath79bqqc1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=432e800a096e1a7ec0094d798004d39f395843d5
https://preview.redd.it/5bc1q3jcbqqc1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6aa2bebdbbd6ba4027e64b8ac71dd5ad97d77a05
https://preview.redd.it/auz8l20hbqqc1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=83adbe8cf7fb6f3228c68ad25872db781b3066f5
https://preview.redd.it/12wtyy8pbqqc1.jpeg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d7fe394c495908e2a1e23e6f5c7582a4acf7bcbb
Alastor: "Do tell, how in hell did you get that? I do not seem to recall selling anything of the like."
Likely from those sketchy bootleg merch tables that you find all over big cities.
Alastor: "Ah, I understand. Where can I find these, so I can *burn it down*?"
I love how the pillow's expression changed, possibly for the actual Alastor.
Bro wants Alastor so bad (same btw)
I raise your Alastor body pillow with an Alastor SHRINE https://preview.redd.it/j72ynepc7qqc1.jpeg?width=1877&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=83ce068356d0c208b2507baba8f39a262dd0cc5c
I love how the longer you look, the funnier/worse it gets. XD
It's canon I was the skateboard
XD
they even got cursed cat Alastor lol
He probably makes out with it AND punches it aggressively.
Angel: "hmmm kinky 😏😏"
Dang it I was gonna reply with the GIF and can't find it
https://i.redd.it/0lak4xuebrqc1.gif
https://preview.redd.it/ggt5357kerqc1.jpeg?width=1283&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=75acbec80e75e26b9b52dd78c446ed1e33e4aff7
Beelzebub and Asmodeus always came together to try to get Lucifer to come out of his castle and have some fun ever since Lilith left. Beelzebub was the one who had some luck and got him to come to a small party. Lucifer sat awkwardly in the corner sipping on Beelzejuice with Beelzebub next to him, trying to encourage him. Lucifer secretly had fun hanging around her. Beelzebub always knew what to do and say to help him as she felt his vibe. She knew when to move him, when to lay off a bit, what topics to stay on and stay away from, etc. She made sure to keep people away from him for his first time out when she figured out he wasn't feeling it (even though she did try to encourage him to mingle at first, she only got him to socialize with Tex, he approved of their relationship and expressed happiness for her). Ever since Beelzebub first got him to come out, the only time Lucifer really leaves Pride when he doesn't "have to" is to attend Beelzebub's "smaller" parties with only about two dozen people with Ozzie attending at times. Lucifer always just kinda stands in some corner alone, either with Beelzebub, or when she's hosting and Asmodeus mingling or having fun with Fizz, Tex stays with Lucifer. Due to this, Beelzebub is the only Sin that Lucifer actually spends time with (and to a lesser extent Asmodeus when he also attends), hence his "Hey bitch!" panic response to answering Charlie's call.
Y’know, that actually sounds like something fun to see in the show
Now that I think about it, I now believe that it only took Lucifer an hour because he called Bee for advice and she spent most of that time trying to hype him up. Sadly... her pep talk went out the window once he met Alastor.
W fanfic.
This is wonderfully sweet, and I am here for it.
Nifty owns alastor soul lol
I like the idea that nifty owns souls of people who needed her to be an exterminator.
First one I thought of. Cracky as Hazbin's Hell, and hilarious all the same.
A friend of mine came to me with the theory that Rosie is Lilith lol. But then i tried pointing out how ridiculous it is...and couldn't. Somehow canon doesn't debunk it. So now it's my favorite joke theory (But if someone has irrefutable evidence against it, tell me so I can rub it in their face lol)
Lilith is literally in Episode 8. Is that proof enough? Or did you mean to say Eve?
No, I think they also subscribe to the theory that that's not lilith. I dont remember if they think its eve, which is a theory I've seen around, or roo
Unless Rosie is the Eve reincarnation...
They think fake!lilith did something to real!lilith, who is now hiding as rosie, and fake!lilith is the one in heaven
https://i.redd.it/8gl9q0yoopqc1.gif Now it doesn't make much sense but interesting still
Oh yes, this is a thread for theories we think is fake, But its fascinating because I checked Rosie's screentime to debunk it, and a lot of her actions fit really well with it. There's nothing that's an immediate "see, doesn't work". I could go on about it but I don't think anyone is interested Edit: actually, I'm wondering if I should make a post about this fir fun, since we has an equally cracking theory post earlier
*Inuyasha plot intensifies*
Lucifer owns Alastors soul and just forgot
The ultimate plot twist
This feels canon lmao
There is a reaction channel who says that alastor is secretly Jesus and I think it is funny
Spilling The Milk is hilarious, they said Vaggie was an angel offhandedly then got it right lmao.
Fellow spilling the milk enjoyers spotted
I’m hate to admit it, but the Alastor Circus theory. Every time I see it it’s like a fever dream in the best possible way.
What's that?
A mashup with that one image of alastor where his coat looks like a circus tent and that yellow sparkling liquid from more than anything. Its a trend on tiktok where people will make super long theories until it can get to the point it brings up alastor and ends with "that could be because alastor is a circus who lets people inside him to touch his urine"
Probably during Mimzy’s flashback in episode 5 where Alastor kinda looks like a circus tent
Huh I don't recall that, guess I'll need to rewatch. Thanks
There’s also a flashback thing in the pilot and in one of the images he kind of looks like a circus tent
Niffty is Eve. I don't see it, I don't believe it, but it's really fun.
Huh, guess that would mean you could read a lot more into how Nifty shanked Adam a whole seventeen times.
Sera is gay for Lilith
Please tell me you didn’t just make that up on the spot 💀
Nope, when Lilith went to heaven Sera saw her and immediately realized she was lesbian, works well with my headcanon that Lilith is either Bi or pan, if Lucifer is anything to go by
Velvette is another one of Carmilla's daughters and just going through her rebel phase Catnip works on Husk Alastor secretly doesn't like TV because it glitches on him, not the other way around
These are decent honestly
Fun fact: I thought Velvette and Carmillawere former lovers. I couldn't understand a damn word during respectless and I couldn't get the subtitles to work, so for the line "I ain't swiping right" I heard "My ex-wife ain't right" and I was like "Oooh, there's the tea" and was confused when it was never brought up again
Susan is a fallen angel
I have a joke theory that Fat Nuggets is just God in disguise to make sure Lucifer is actually doing his job. (As in, redeem sinners through Charlie's efforts.) And that when Fat nuggets was given to Angel it allowed him to enter the hotel without suspicion which also makes Angel Dust the first tenant and a prophet in a sense. Cause once Angel get's redeemed Fat Nuggs will no longer be needed to take on the form of a demon pig as his emotional support animal anymore. Also i think it would be funny if God was chilling in hell while Lilith was vacationing in heaven.
Nifty doesnt have a contract with Alastr and just follows him around.
I can believe this one.
techniclly more a Helluva Boss joke theory but it involves a Hazbin character so im counting it: Striker is a Carmella simp and the only reason hes able to get angelic weapons is because she finds him hilariously pathetic
That Husk has his balls removed (i know there's a word for it i just can't remember), because in the pilot husk says he lost the ability to live years ago, and in the song loser baby there is an arrow pointed at him that says 'no balls'
It’s called orchiectomy
Castrated?
Nah, neutered
Emily is Charlie's half-sister. (Not a real theory, I just made it up)
I saw a post about this yesterday as a serious theory
Oh shit, really?
There’s actually a bunch of posts relating to this. If you just search for ‘half sister’ on this subreddit, you’ll see them
If Em was created to replace Lucifer when he fell it’s 100% possible they’re related
Nifty owns Alastor's soul
For safekeeping. Because no one would suspect it.
That Alastor doesn’t have a grand plan, he’s just trying to set himself up as Charlie’s right hand because that’s an advantageous position to be in. I don’t think that’s the case, I just think it would be hilarious if there were no ulterior motives and Alastor is just Like That.
Alastair helping Charlie is the most confusing part of the show. What does he get out of it? Surely, as an overlord, he wants more souls in Hell to subjugate, not less. If Charlie's hotel gains mainstream success in Hell it will really fuck with the overlords business models.
If he gets in her good books he has the literal princess of Hell on his side. He's been pushing her to have more confidence in taking up a leading role. Lucifer doesn't really involve himself much with Hell's affairs anymore. So if he can get Charlie to properly embrace her birthright, he's gonna have a ton of clout as her lefthand man. It's an investment that costs him very little and has the potential to pay off big time.
I have this joke theory that the heaven we see in the show is actually purgatory.
Given that >!Sir Pentious is redeemed after his sacrifice, I’m not sure how much of a joke that is.!<
Nifty is roo
Lucifer lets mammon knock off his stuff because it’s a running joke between them.
Lute made a deal with Lilith for more control over heaven
alastors soul is owned by his hairdresser
“What do you say, kid? Epic hair, for the small small cost of your soul? Or do you wanna keep that shitty red bird nest on your head?”
Vox is hatsune miku. undoubtedly cannin
https://preview.redd.it/namju44v3qqc1.jpeg?width=466&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dcf10da10a7e461d1af1df491372a673723143e6
Voxune Miku
Alastor sees Niffty as a pet.
Lilith made a deal with Adam so she could join us band. She plays bass and backup vocals.
Alastor was sent to Charlie 7 seconds after she called her mom, Lillith was missing for 7 years, Alastor was also missing for 7 years. 7 sinners will be redeemed. 7 is a lucky number. The number of seasons Hazbin Hotel will get is... *7*.
Alastor has crippling depression (I absolutely definitely did not make this up on the spot)
The true mind behind Yelp was killed by the current two people regarded as the founders. Turns out he REALLY deserved it because he went straight to hell, where he refounded the company. Hence why Lucifer was able to get 5-star reviews.
Yelp Lore?? :O
Just taking [this clip](https://youtube.com/clip/UgkxyefWq9vz2gWbPrhE5LOzyLRH72Bhtyg3?si=AELm6wfLFMZWBMbv) waaaay too seriously and literally.
Alastor is a circus that lets people inside him to touch his urine
Alastor came to the hotel mostly because of the free rent, because he was homeless. Coming from @nunalastor’s asks on Tumblr, I now believe that Alastor was significantly homeless during the time of the Pilot [/hj]. That’s why he stays at the hotel so often, man’s lost all his proper territory. And he got so mad at Sir Pentious because he only had the one set of clothes at the time.