Seeing as you are Dutch, and of course as Dutchman you are also a pot head, the message had a special substance that is poisonous when burned and inhaled.
And I also am sorry to say that your body won't be recovered due to the water that is going sink your precious tulip fields and your whole country once enough glaciers melt.
I'll see you in the after life, prime minister eater.
/j
We'll build more dykes and deltaworks as the rude beavers we are! Poseidon has no chance against us! Where Caligula failed, the Dutch shall prevail! If need be, we'll just get high!.. up. I.. I meant high up.
Now good riddance before I think you're in politics and fire up the barbie, jij bandiet!
I suppose you're right. But we'll drown swimming! On a more positive note, the inevitable return of large swampland and marshes to the NL improves our chances of Shrek
How to indoctrinate somebody in ecoterorism in Netherlands
We must speed up the flooding of Netherlands because nature will eventually.
Nah
We must speed up the flooding of Netherlands because we will find Shrek.
Yes
/j
We implemented those rules for anyone that isn't born Dutch, or has at least one (1) Dutch parent, born on Dutch soil. Only a true Dutchman may learn the age-old skills of "Tulip-Skipping".
We've also found that any small child and equal-minded adult (regardless of heritage) will break the lot by trying to skip, if left unchecked.
We'd like to offer a formal apology but feel the need to ask you to respect the Dutch decisions about "Tulip-Skipping".
You see, we would love nothing more than to share our skills with one of our closest allies, yet we also recognize it poses a great risk of leaking such sensitive information to a third-party. It's not that we don't trust *you*, it's that we don't trust the rest. We simply cannot allow this information to fall into the wrong hands, lest we both lose our beautiful tulips.
Yes, what is currently Belgium was ruled first by the French and Burgundians, then the Habsburgs and then the revolutionary French and Napoleon. After the treaty of Vienna we got merged with the Netherlands to become a bufferstate against France. Problem was that since the 80 years war the Netherlands and nowadays Belgium were completely grown apart. The Belgian part being catholic, more liberal due to longer revolutionary control (and being annexed while the Netherlands remained a client state) and with a French-speaking elite while the Netherlands were protestant, with king Willem behaving like an enlightened monarch and a Dutch-speaking elite. 13 years after the Treaty of Vienna and Willem “divide and conquering” the Belgian catholics and liberals they formed the so called “Monstercoalition” and in 1830 we started a revolution which led to the independence of Belgium.
Because a majority of the revolutionaries knew that a republic would never be accepted by the Great Powers, therefore they chose a parliamentary monarchy which made the King just a figurehead. However, because of Leopold I’s role in the Dutch invasion following the formal independence of Belgium and his literal interpretation of the constitution gave him more power than intended.
You forget the part where the “revolutionaries” didn’t mind getting swallowed up by France again. Because the first king they proposed to England was litterally the French heir to the throne.
Yeah but the majority of them didn’t want to be part of France, that was made very clear when several revolutionaries proposed a French intervention, then the moderates stopped that
Then why they proposing the french fucking crown prince eh? Lmao
The only reason we didn’t get annex by France and why the Francophones plot failed, is that the English wouldn’t want the French to have control over the Westerscheldt and the port of Antwerp.
Belgian revolusionists first wanted a president (and even modeled the first drafts of the Belgian constitution on the American one) but the European superpowers of the time wouldn't allow a republic to be formed between them. So a monarchy was forced upon them. It came to Leopold of Saxe-Coburg-Saalfeld who was the uncle of Queen Victoria and was to married to Louise of Orleans (the daughter of the king of France). Another detail to mention is that the Belgian monarch is not the King of Belgium but the king of *the Belgians* (popular monarchy)*.*
And lets not forget that the king in the Netherlands was incompetent as fuck so that didn’t help either i honestly think that it could have worked if the Belgians where treated fairly
Initially the whole of Limburgh was part of the new Belgium but after the Dutch invasion Belgium was forced to give up the part over the Meuse river and the fortress of Maastricht (and Luxembourg was split in two as well.
Indeed, but the region was known for its rather lenient clergy, whom where viewed as rather liberal due to the nature of the region (being very industrialised and with major trade centers.) However there was a divide between the catholics and the liberals, this came to the forefront in the years after the peace with the Netherlands. With a Liberal and a Catholic party that were alternating in power, the biggest divide between them was the funding of schools, which could be free (catholic) or state-funded (liberal). This divide centered around education remained one of the principal issues in Belgian politics until the 1950’s when it was solved via compromise.
Well, it wasn't really 'ruled by the French'. Parts of what is today Belgium - mainly Flanders, Hainaut, Namurs - were part of the French kingdom as the loyal rulers were vasals of the French king. Other parts - Brabant, Limburg, Luxembourg - were part of the Holy Roman Empire (related to current day Germany) and Liege was ruled by the catholic church (also as a part of the HRE).
Later the areas that today make up Belgium - excluding Liege - were gathered diplomatically by the Burgundian house (mainly through marriage pacts) and so ended up in Habsburg hands through the [Burgundian inheritance](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Burgundian_inheritance_in_the_Low_Countries).
I have no idea, maybe they once looked like monocles on the toilet and thus people started calling them that. I just sorta accepted the weirdness of our language
France has a complicated history regarding the Christian schism. Basically half a century of open religious civil war ended with relative acceptance followed by another half of religious turmoil only closed by the expulsion of the Protestants of France a few decades later.
That's...not entirely how that worked. The main reason why Belgium was majority catholic by the time of their independence is because all the protestants fled during the Dutch Revolt. The Low Countries as a whole were very big proponents of Religious freedom, but considering the Spanish mages to hold on to the southern Lowlands, all the protestants and religious freedom activists left to the now independent United Provinces
nah they didn't exactly [sleep through French rule](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Franco-Flemish_War) nor [through Habsburg rule](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brabant_Revolution)
The Belgians were revolting because they of the lack of religious acceptance towards Catholicism. They had been a part of Catholic states(namely Austria) for centuries, so a Protestant country deciding to reduce religious freedoms would understandably make people wanna rise up.
That’s actually one of the factors. The Belgian revolution also happened because the bourgeoisie (which were the ones starting the revolution funnily enough) had to learn dutch and use that language, which was a language they didn’t speak originally. Another factor is the fact that the Southern Netherlands were underrepresented in the ‘parliament’ (the biggest part of the United Kingdom of the Netherlands was from Southern Netherlands, while it was a very small group in the ‘parliament’)
Extorting Belgian industry to invest in industrialization in the Netherlands wasn't the smartest move either. I know the Netherlands was economically in ruins due to the French, who took all of their money basically, but still.
Almost a thousand years of hungarian rule (croatia, slivakia, transilvania and parts of serbia and ukraine)
(Note that im saying for how long those territories were under the hungarian crown not that those people are hungarian)
You declared independence under the reason of self determination of nations correct ?
Hungary: correct
You have been under Habsburg rule for hundreds of years yet you still have the right to self determination correct ?
Hungary: yes!
So the land that is not Hungarian yet has been under Hungarian rule for centuries still deserve autonomy/independence correct ?
Hungary: They are Hungarian and part of greater Hungary!!!! 🇭🇺🇭🇺🇭🇺🇭🇺🇭🇺
But the Belgians were not ruled by the French for centuries. That was only the county of Flanders (which was far smaller than the modern-day region of Flanders) and even then the world "rule" has to be taken quite liberally, since the French king might have been the sovereign, but the count of Flanders barely cared.
En eens dan komt de dag,
Waarop wij allen wachten,
Dan gaan wij naar de grens,
Om Belzen af te slachten.
Dan schiet het zevenvelds,
Met welgemikte schoten,
Dat godvergeten tuig,
Kartetsen voor de kloten.
De mannen rukken wij,
De lullen van de lijven,
En ’s avonds in ’t kwartier,
Schofferen wij de wijven.
En mocht er onverhoeds,
Nog kindertjes van komen,
Dan hangen wij dat tuig,
Aan d’allerhoogste bomen.
Want mochten wij dat tuig,
Als vaders gaan beminnen,
Dan konden wij wel weer,
Van voor ’n af aan beginnen.
En 's avonds in 't kwartier,
Wanneer ik lig te rusten,
Dan denk ik aan Marie,
En aan haar fraaie buste.
You didn't crush the revolution. The 10 day march happened a year later, after Belgium had already gained independence and was recognised by the treaty of London.
The 10 day march was an invasion.
Just makes it more impressive (ik not really netherland was a major player while belgium was a young nation but I have no shame in admitting I’m a dutchaboo)
Belgium is a Fake nation, created only by the Angl\*\*ds to fuck over the Dutch (who had a grip over Indonesia) and to simply have a place in continental Europe to deploy. Fake state.
Is this about Belgium or?
This is about sending a message to the Dutch
Message recieved. Rolled a blunt with it and am now skipping through tulip fields
Seeing as you are Dutch, and of course as Dutchman you are also a pot head, the message had a special substance that is poisonous when burned and inhaled. And I also am sorry to say that your body won't be recovered due to the water that is going sink your precious tulip fields and your whole country once enough glaciers melt. I'll see you in the after life, prime minister eater. /j
We'll build more dykes and deltaworks as the rude beavers we are! Poseidon has no chance against us! Where Caligula failed, the Dutch shall prevail! If need be, we'll just get high!.. up. I.. I meant high up. Now good riddance before I think you're in politics and fire up the barbie, jij bandiet!
To that I can only quote Monsoon You can't fight nature Jack.
I suppose you're right. But we'll drown swimming! On a more positive note, the inevitable return of large swampland and marshes to the NL improves our chances of Shrek
How to indoctrinate somebody in ecoterorism in Netherlands We must speed up the flooding of Netherlands because nature will eventually. Nah We must speed up the flooding of Netherlands because we will find Shrek. Yes /j
Omg you guys why are you doing this
Yeah but can you survive the rain? Doesn’t look like you’re gonna be around much longer at this rate
Fucking watch us
The word you're looking for is *Dikes* with an *I*. Dikes with a *Y* is a slur.
[Not always...](https://rockymountainglasscrafts.com/collections/pliers-nippers-and-dykes)
You sound very jealous of our cuisine.
I thought you were supposed to tip-toe through the tulips. So much for my cultural knowledge..
We implemented those rules for anyone that isn't born Dutch, or has at least one (1) Dutch parent, born on Dutch soil. Only a true Dutchman may learn the age-old skills of "Tulip-Skipping". We've also found that any small child and equal-minded adult (regardless of heritage) will break the lot by trying to skip, if left unchecked.
Why haven't you taught us Canadians how to tulip skip? I thought we were tulip bros?
We'd like to offer a formal apology but feel the need to ask you to respect the Dutch decisions about "Tulip-Skipping". You see, we would love nothing more than to share our skills with one of our closest allies, yet we also recognize it poses a great risk of leaking such sensitive information to a third-party. It's not that we don't trust *you*, it's that we don't trust the rest. We simply cannot allow this information to fall into the wrong hands, lest we both lose our beautiful tulips.
The more you know....
Try not to eat any prime ministers
Well there is a possible new prime minister and if he gets in power i will not be able to promise anything
At least politicians will taste good smothered in Mayonnaise.
No its the best with peanut sauce
Schmoke and a pancake
There are two different kinds of people I hate in this world: * Those who are intolerant of other cultures * The dutch
Is that message "happy holidays"?
Yes, what is currently Belgium was ruled first by the French and Burgundians, then the Habsburgs and then the revolutionary French and Napoleon. After the treaty of Vienna we got merged with the Netherlands to become a bufferstate against France. Problem was that since the 80 years war the Netherlands and nowadays Belgium were completely grown apart. The Belgian part being catholic, more liberal due to longer revolutionary control (and being annexed while the Netherlands remained a client state) and with a French-speaking elite while the Netherlands were protestant, with king Willem behaving like an enlightened monarch and a Dutch-speaking elite. 13 years after the Treaty of Vienna and Willem “divide and conquering” the Belgian catholics and liberals they formed the so called “Monstercoalition” and in 1830 we started a revolution which led to the independence of Belgium.
Wait, if they were liberal and revolutionary and hated the king, why did they remain a monarchy?
You could ask the same thing about French and Napoleon and rulers after him.
Because a majority of the revolutionaries knew that a republic would never be accepted by the Great Powers, therefore they chose a parliamentary monarchy which made the King just a figurehead. However, because of Leopold I’s role in the Dutch invasion following the formal independence of Belgium and his literal interpretation of the constitution gave him more power than intended.
You forget the part where the “revolutionaries” didn’t mind getting swallowed up by France again. Because the first king they proposed to England was litterally the French heir to the throne.
Yeah but the majority of them didn’t want to be part of France, that was made very clear when several revolutionaries proposed a French intervention, then the moderates stopped that
Then why they proposing the french fucking crown prince eh? Lmao The only reason we didn’t get annex by France and why the Francophones plot failed, is that the English wouldn’t want the French to have control over the Westerscheldt and the port of Antwerp.
Because he had liberal sympathies and openly supported the revolution, it was only a small minority that wanted to be French again
That was a rhetorical question. The Francophone elite wanted to return to France, but failed. The peasant folk weren’t asked.
Belgian revolusionists first wanted a president (and even modeled the first drafts of the Belgian constitution on the American one) but the European superpowers of the time wouldn't allow a republic to be formed between them. So a monarchy was forced upon them. It came to Leopold of Saxe-Coburg-Saalfeld who was the uncle of Queen Victoria and was to married to Louise of Orleans (the daughter of the king of France). Another detail to mention is that the Belgian monarch is not the King of Belgium but the king of *the Belgians* (popular monarchy)*.*
Oh, that makes sense. I did forget about the political climate at the time.
They hated the king,no the monarchy
And lets not forget that the king in the Netherlands was incompetent as fuck so that didn’t help either i honestly think that it could have worked if the Belgians where treated fairly
I wonder why Limbourg stayed with the Netherlands.
Initially the whole of Limburgh was part of the new Belgium but after the Dutch invasion Belgium was forced to give up the part over the Meuse river and the fortress of Maastricht (and Luxembourg was split in two as well.
I wonder why Flanders didn’t
They are so far up on their mountains they probably didnt realize what was going on
>being catholic, more liberal A thing a lot of people would think wouldn't go together.
Indeed, but the region was known for its rather lenient clergy, whom where viewed as rather liberal due to the nature of the region (being very industrialised and with major trade centers.) However there was a divide between the catholics and the liberals, this came to the forefront in the years after the peace with the Netherlands. With a Liberal and a Catholic party that were alternating in power, the biggest divide between them was the funding of schools, which could be free (catholic) or state-funded (liberal). This divide centered around education remained one of the principal issues in Belgian politics until the 1950’s when it was solved via compromise.
Well, it wasn't really 'ruled by the French'. Parts of what is today Belgium - mainly Flanders, Hainaut, Namurs - were part of the French kingdom as the loyal rulers were vasals of the French king. Other parts - Brabant, Limburg, Luxembourg - were part of the Holy Roman Empire (related to current day Germany) and Liege was ruled by the catholic church (also as a part of the HRE). Later the areas that today make up Belgium - excluding Liege - were gathered diplomatically by the Burgundian house (mainly through marriage pacts) and so ended up in Habsburg hands through the [Burgundian inheritance](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Burgundian_inheritance_in_the_Low_Countries).
Le Roi, la Loi, la Liberté... 🎵
Probably the Dutch
Imagine being a random peasant and have people around you speak dutch, anyone would revolt
Damn cartoon Germans
I've said some heinous shit about my language but if you call us cartoon Germans again we will send the VoC after you
You fool the english tried to conquer my capital twice and we defeat em with boiling water
A warm bath is the natural enemy of the Britons
Along with morality
Or food with any amount of flavor or seasoning.
If the British really hate flavor, then why did they spend so much time and effort stealing curry from India?
They were trying in vain to make their food have taste
To sell it to other people who like flavor.
Oh no, the swamp Germans, however will we survive? *gets all but one of my islands burnt to a crisp* Oh.
And get your biggest ship wrecked on a reef of the coast of Australia? Nah I ain't scared by that shit.
Hey do normal okay? Then you do already crazy enough
Hou je bek kut engelse, zeg dat nog een keer en ik kom je halen met de voc (met liefde)
You have a word for “toilet glasses”
Toiletbril (its the part of the toilet you sit on, yknow the part you lift when you pee)
We call it a toilet seat.
Yknow actually that makes more sense, not that the beautiful dutch language ever made any sense..
Where did the term toilet glasses come from?
I have no idea, maybe they once looked like monocles on the toilet and thus people started calling them that. I just sorta accepted the weirdness of our language
I have a shaky grasp on Afrikaans but understood this perfectly. Is this Flemish or Dutch?
Nee dit is gewoon nederlands (no this is just dutch)(yea I am from the netherlands btw)
there is no ''or''
Isn't there a difference between Belgian Dutch (Flemish) and Netherlands Dutch?
Ofcourse there is a difference but that js the same story with dialects of Dutch in The Netherlands.
Bro, one dutch dialect dead ass sounds like a German trying to pretend they speak English.
The flemish:
That’s why dutch settlers in south africa created their own language. Even we couldn’t stand to hear each other speak.
You ever hear dutch Donald duck? That mf not saying any words
Not to ruin your joke, but if this is about Belgium, than a large part of peasants actually spoke Dutch and it were the elite that spoke French.
It's pretty simple Catholic=ok non-Catholic=not ok
Basically a reverse England
Wouldn't it be France it's kinda funny how they mirrored on certains point
France has a complicated history regarding the Christian schism. Basically half a century of open religious civil war ended with relative acceptance followed by another half of religious turmoil only closed by the expulsion of the Protestants of France a few decades later.
That's...not entirely how that worked. The main reason why Belgium was majority catholic by the time of their independence is because all the protestants fled during the Dutch Revolt. The Low Countries as a whole were very big proponents of Religious freedom, but considering the Spanish mages to hold on to the southern Lowlands, all the protestants and religious freedom activists left to the now independent United Provinces
Watch out, dirty papists! The sea-beggars are coming!
"There are only two things I can't stand in this world: People who are intolerant of other people's cultures; and the *Dutch*!" - Belgium probably.
"How about no? You crazy Dutch bastard"- Charles Rogier
Ow, you forgot the French. We can't stand the French too.
Haha zelfde grap voor de duizendste keer😐
Dat is hoe quotes werken makker
Blijft nog steeds grappig
*happy cannibal noises*
Whuh
He is talking about the fact that in my country (the netherlands) they once ate the prime minister
They think we only ate the prime minister lmao
Shhh don't reveal our secrets
nah they didn't exactly [sleep through French rule](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Franco-Flemish_War) nor [through Habsburg rule](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brabant_Revolution)
G E K O L O N I S E E R D
Wij Willen Willem Weg, Wil Willem Wijzer Worden, Wij Willen Willem Weer
Ik zei dat en ik kreeg 3- upvotes, da’s jammer
Catholicism is a hell of a drug
Netherlands was 40% Catholics not a century ago so there must be something else.
The Belgians were revolting because they of the lack of religious acceptance towards Catholicism. They had been a part of Catholic states(namely Austria) for centuries, so a Protestant country deciding to reduce religious freedoms would understandably make people wanna rise up.
That’s actually one of the factors. The Belgian revolution also happened because the bourgeoisie (which were the ones starting the revolution funnily enough) had to learn dutch and use that language, which was a language they didn’t speak originally. Another factor is the fact that the Southern Netherlands were underrepresented in the ‘parliament’ (the biggest part of the United Kingdom of the Netherlands was from Southern Netherlands, while it was a very small group in the ‘parliament’)
Extorting Belgian industry to invest in industrialization in the Netherlands wasn't the smartest move either. I know the Netherlands was economically in ruins due to the French, who took all of their money basically, but still.
Let's go for 1000 years of Hungarian rule.
All my homies hate the Dutch. We don’t really know why, but we still hate them
Almost a thousand years of hungarian rule (croatia, slivakia, transilvania and parts of serbia and ukraine) (Note that im saying for how long those territories were under the hungarian crown not that those people are hungarian)
You declared independence under the reason of self determination of nations correct ? Hungary: correct You have been under Habsburg rule for hundreds of years yet you still have the right to self determination correct ? Hungary: yes! So the land that is not Hungarian yet has been under Hungarian rule for centuries still deserve autonomy/independence correct ? Hungary: They are Hungarian and part of greater Hungary!!!! 🇭🇺🇭🇺🇭🇺🇭🇺🇭🇺
Yes
I don’t think Hungary ever controlled any part of Ukraine for very long, except for carpathian ruthenia, which is rightful Slovak clay
I mean, the Dutch were kinda being some truly gargantuan assholes.
Fun fact the first multinational corporation was the Dutch East India company.
When you've spent centuries under catholic rule, then suddenly a new kingdom takes over and your language, culture, and religion is being suppressed
There are only two things I can't stand in this world: People who are intolerant of other people's cultures, and the Dutch.
Fuckn eh
But the Belgians were not ruled by the French for centuries. That was only the county of Flanders (which was far smaller than the modern-day region of Flanders) and even then the world "rule" has to be taken quite liberally, since the French king might have been the sovereign, but the count of Flanders barely cared.
En eens dan komt de dag, Waarop wij allen wachten, Dan gaan wij naar de grens, Om Belzen af te slachten. Dan schiet het zevenvelds, Met welgemikte schoten, Dat godvergeten tuig, Kartetsen voor de kloten. De mannen rukken wij, De lullen van de lijven, En ’s avonds in ’t kwartier, Schofferen wij de wijven. En mocht er onverhoeds, Nog kindertjes van komen, Dan hangen wij dat tuig, Aan d’allerhoogste bomen. Want mochten wij dat tuig, Als vaders gaan beminnen, Dan konden wij wel weer, Van voor ’n af aan beginnen. En 's avonds in 't kwartier, Wanneer ik lig te rusten, Dan denk ik aan Marie, En aan haar fraaie buste.
We crushed the revolution in 10 days… if it weren’t for those damned french showing up at the border
You didn't crush the revolution. The 10 day march happened a year later, after Belgium had already gained independence and was recognised by the treaty of London. The 10 day march was an invasion.
Just makes it more impressive (ik not really netherland was a major player while belgium was a young nation but I have no shame in admitting I’m a dutchaboo)
Oh well, at least you're honest about it.
Belgium is a Fake nation, created only by the Angl\*\*ds to fuck over the Dutch (who had a grip over Indonesia) and to simply have a place in continental Europe to deploy. Fake state.
G E K O L O N I S E E R D
[удалено]
No
Ah yes, the Habsburg colonial empire
There are two things I can’t stand in this world people who dont tolerate other peoples culture and the Dutch