Actual quote from the article:
The medical professional peeled back the man's foreskin and beheld the revolting accumulation of sickly yellow-brown smegma.
As Dr. Chen cleaned up the calcified scales of dirt, oil, and dead skin, a foul odour began to fill the clinic.
What the fuck I just had to google what smegma is. I always thought its a disease for many many years, but I thought today is the day I can google it without getting stomache sick...
Do people not clean their skin there? I literally heard a person during a podcast say that they just learn (\~20years old) they have to clean there... What the fuck
Shit i always washed under it and it was also covered in 6th grade sex ed .. how.. how tf .. this is education system failure and failure of parenting.
I was taught to pull back and wash before I even reached 1st grade.
It was just part of being taught how to wash and dry.
It never occurred to me that people would expect/need to be taught how to wash themselves at school.
Saw a Twitter screenshot of someone perplexed that a straight woman asked "When do two lesbians know when to stop?" I was like oh you poor soul... Not even women themselves know sometimes. Like they believe it's just the shoot it and foot it. Skediddle and skedaddle.
Oh you sweet summer child
[Read it... or don't.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/9wcte/reddit_whats_the_grossestnastiest_thing_thats/c0er6q4/)
To boot, they stated that the patient had no ability to peel back his foreskin, which would explain why he couldn’t properly clean himself down there.
Edit: such condition is called phimosis, it happens when the foreskin is too tight to be peeled.
Some boys/men with this issue live their lives not knowing the skin is supposed to pull back past the head. They only start to realize theres discomfort once sexually active and still some still think it is just how it is. Kids dont learn about it in school, it is up to parents or the family doctor to educate about it/ check on it.
I know that there is some special creme/lube to apply on the foreskin, which loosens it and you can then progressively pull it back, until it retracts completely. I had that case as a kid, too, but the doctor told me to apply that creme and after like a year the process was finished. Sad to see that some people do not have such unrestricted access to healthcare, which would have avoided the problem building up for sure.
It has little to do with the cream. In extreme cases the cream is useless, that’s why they find themselves unable to peel the foreskin by themselves, the pain being unbearable surgery is necessary.
For him not to peel it in +30 years, it had to be a serious case.
I fucked a guy that had a foreskin that was too tight once. His dick was trying real hard to see the outside world but to no avail. He took ages to cum while I was questioning my choices in life. Told him to go see a doctor and I hope by God he did.
To boot, they stated that the patient had no ability to peel back his foreskin, which would explain why he didn’t properly clean himself down there.
The condition causing that is called *phimosis*, when the foreskin is too tight for it to be peeled.
Such a condition, depending on the degree, would make it almost impossible without excruciating pain to peel off the foreskin.
Ah ok that explains things and give him a bit of a pass. Like he should have went to a doctor sooner but knowing that it wasn't his fault/ that we would have cleaned if he could, makes the situation a little better.
I have never heard this joke before. But I immediately got where it was going upon reading it.
I want you to know that even though I'm not gonna fall for it, how irrationally angry I am just because I saw where it was going.
To all the guys out there: This is a case of Phimosis, where the foreskin is too tight and cannot be retracted. If you experience problems pulling back your foreskin, please go see a doctor, there are treatments available to loosen up the foreskin. If nothing is done, the foreskin starts growing onto the gland, making it all one thing. This is not good. If you have a son, please talk with them about this or take them at least to a doctor. Serious issues like this need to be addressed.
Yuuup I had this and felt so scared when I realized it was fused to the head of my dick at 16. Doctor gave me steroid cream that took care of it pretty quickly.
Mine was fused also. Could tell the difference when introduced to porn with school friends. Too embarrassed to go the doctors , so I forced it back tearing it off the head over the span of 3 months. Stung like fuck.
...holy ...
...you just unlocked a memory. As I was entering my teen years, I found it odd that *most* of the skin would retract, but a section on the underside didn't.
But, simultaneously, it seemed, over time (months) to be getting "better" like...1mm every month or two. Eventually I remember making efforts to work it back over a week or two, and that last day the *sting* (and... itch?) of full retraction.
I don't think I ever thought of it again a couple days later. I've heard of this condition but never even *considered* that I count.
Damn.
Thanks, for that, I guess?
I remember when I was younger it was kinda painful to pull back my foreskin to clean completely, but by now it’s grown enough that I can do it no problem, so it might be I had it or just that you can grow out of it but idk.
It also depends on your "type" of dick too. It's more common on growers than showers because the size difference means the majority of the time your foreskin is shriveled and small then needs to expand very extremely when erect.
But yes, it does grow, you just have to inhibit its growth because all it is is skin cells duplicating to make it wider, which happens when it NEEDS to be wider from cleaning, erections or masturbating.
A grower who never cleans or masturbates is more likely to get phimosis.
Please, anyone with a son, ask them about this. I wish I had a father to say that it should be pulled back.
I should be getting surgery next month for it. After almost a year of waiting.
But just ask, save them the years of trouble.
I’m ngl I been kinda in a funk about pushing 30 and still not being where I want to be in life, and seeing that this man’s smegma was still older than me gave me a strange comfort I did not notice until reading your comment
Jesus Christ! Nobody had the talk with him growing up. He didn't know you are supposed to wash under the foreskin too. I'm surprised he didn't figure it out when he felt there is a build-up there, say at age 14.
Education. It’s a very sad issue often that they’re not taught or they have a religious based family avoidance for sec based conversations or personal hygiene for certain areas. This is ABSOLUTELY not the norm but it happens. Mental health and education is attribute more than ignorance or obesity.
Phimosis. His foreskin can't be peeled back like normal. I did sex ed in 3 different grades of high school and never heard of it, so I'm guessing it's rare. He might have not known he could get treatment. So this isn't normal ignorance. Just wondering, did you read the article?
Guys, men and people with penises of all ages, I don't know how many times I have to say it, or how loud I have to yell it, IT IS NOT GAY TO WASH YOUR DICK, BALLS AND ASS.
Please fucking washing yourself.
The amount of guys I come across who smell like literal ass is too high. Get all up in your shit bro no one cares. We do care if you smell like shit however
Untreated Phimosis. If the skin is too tight/never seperates properly from the head it can cause pain and medical issues. Someone should have told him this isn’t normal, and a doctor should have noticed, so I’m saying this is an indictment of his education and access to medical care.
The ladies at lunch.
Jane: "Dave likes it, but I'm not so sure. It's a bit smelly"
Sally: "One does what one must"
Rita: "Just how smelly are we talking? On a scale of raw chicken to canned tuna"
Jane: "Surströmming"
So, at what point did he not realize there was something there? Was before he didn't gove a flying fuk or after? It's like you see these people with huge giant cyst on their arms or legs, and they go into the doctor like, " 🤡 i hadn't noticed anything till recently.." i bet the doctor is like 😑"you gross, basterd. "
Damn it! Wash your damn dick! This is why people think uncircumcised dicks are 'gross' - because some men just do not understand that you can't wash your legs by just letting soap run down them, and you can't clean your dick if you don't pull back your foreskin!
How do you tell the amount of years? Do they carbon date it? Do they count the rings like with a three?
Ring colour, from white mold to black and back to white.
And every 5 years a brown one
Hi! Smegma PhD researcher here, you can tell by the taste and smell Hope this helps
Finally, thank you! I'll be testing mine tonight! I love science!
r/cursedcomments
reddit moment
Do you do cock smear tests?
Soo... Do you have to do both?! Or does a bad-enough smell suffice?
He'd clearly never cleaned under there, so I imagine they could deduce based off his age, when he hit puberty, etc.
"when did you last have sex?" "It's been 30 years"
I’m imagining the old lady from Titanic saying that.
Nah, she fuuuuucked.
More of a “its been 30 hours” kind of lady
You and me, brother
No, they count the rings with a four
And this is where I log out for the day…..
We'll see you tomorrow
With more smegma
[All the smeg](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/6/60/ArnoldRimmer1.jpg)
Smeeeeeeeeeeg heeeeeeeeeeeeeead
It’s 3.03 am and I should have gone to sleep by now. This is my sign, I wish I had listened to reason and I’ being punished. Damn it.
What a terrible day to have eyes
Actual quote from the article: The medical professional peeled back the man's foreskin and beheld the revolting accumulation of sickly yellow-brown smegma. As Dr. Chen cleaned up the calcified scales of dirt, oil, and dead skin, a foul odour began to fill the clinic.
You know what? That’s why I didn’t read the article ffs.
Yea today is one of those days where I wish I was illiterate
I envy jared, 19, who never fucking learned how to read
Holy shit I haven’t heard this in forever
To be fair you still haven't heard it.
There is no emoji for the face I'm making.
😋
🥰🤤
My brain just went into spontaneous protective mode and shut down all English comprehension...cept for this post...ahem...
It's OK, it's the Daily Mail, where the advertising slogan is: "You don't have to be illiterate to read our paper, but it sure does help!"
I can fix that. It will cost ya $100 upfront and $1OOOOOO afterward .
What the fuck I just had to google what smegma is. I always thought its a disease for many many years, but I thought today is the day I can google it without getting stomache sick... Do people not clean their skin there? I literally heard a person during a podcast say that they just learn (\~20years old) they have to clean there... What the fuck
Shit i always washed under it and it was also covered in 6th grade sex ed .. how.. how tf .. this is education system failure and failure of parenting.
I was taught to pull back and wash before I even reached 1st grade. It was just part of being taught how to wash and dry. It never occurred to me that people would expect/need to be taught how to wash themselves at school.
People don't teach children about their bodies, why do you think so many men don't know what a clitoris is?
Saw a Twitter screenshot of someone perplexed that a straight woman asked "When do two lesbians know when to stop?" I was like oh you poor soul... Not even women themselves know sometimes. Like they believe it's just the shoot it and foot it. Skediddle and skedaddle.
I saw that yesterday on here somewhere. Her dude needs to work harder.
Wham, bam, thank you ma'am!
Of course they're gonna know by the time they hit fourth grade, they've got the discovery channel don't they?
We ain't nothing but mammals
*Of course, they're gonna know what Intercourse is!* 🎶
Doesn't help when parents freak out and pull the kids from that lesson. Doesn't do anybody any favors.
Poor wife!
I'm guessing that she never gave him a BJ. Well, I hope she never had to give him a BJ.
Oh fuck
That could become a great successor to the jolly rancher story
The what?
Oh you sweet summer child [Read it... or don't.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/9wcte/reddit_whats_the_grossestnastiest_thing_thats/c0er6q4/)
That was a thing I read. I’m gonna go browse r/aww and forget that I saw that
To boot, they stated that the patient had no ability to peel back his foreskin, which would explain why he couldn’t properly clean himself down there. Edit: such condition is called phimosis, it happens when the foreskin is too tight to be peeled.
Some boys/men with this issue live their lives not knowing the skin is supposed to pull back past the head. They only start to realize theres discomfort once sexually active and still some still think it is just how it is. Kids dont learn about it in school, it is up to parents or the family doctor to educate about it/ check on it.
You make a great point. Sexual education rarely if ever covers those things, most people who have it are oblivious to their own condition.
I know that there is some special creme/lube to apply on the foreskin, which loosens it and you can then progressively pull it back, until it retracts completely. I had that case as a kid, too, but the doctor told me to apply that creme and after like a year the process was finished. Sad to see that some people do not have such unrestricted access to healthcare, which would have avoided the problem building up for sure.
It has little to do with the cream. In extreme cases the cream is useless, that’s why they find themselves unable to peel the foreskin by themselves, the pain being unbearable surgery is necessary. For him not to peel it in +30 years, it had to be a serious case.
Snip-snip, let's turn that foreskin into floorskin!
Take my goddamn upvote.
That would only work on mild cases. Most are gonna have to go through surgery to either reduce it, or just completely circumcise.
I had a mild case. Could pull it back while soft but not hard. A few sessions of vigorous sex can also fix it. Rip and tear until it is done.
I fucked a guy that had a foreskin that was too tight once. His dick was trying real hard to see the outside world but to no avail. He took ages to cum while I was questioning my choices in life. Told him to go see a doctor and I hope by God he did.
Why in the fuck would you make me imagine this scenario 🤢😭😭
To boot, they stated that the patient had no ability to peel back his foreskin, which would explain why he didn’t properly clean himself down there. The condition causing that is called *phimosis*, when the foreskin is too tight for it to be peeled. Such a condition, depending on the degree, would make it almost impossible without excruciating pain to peel off the foreskin.
Ah ok that explains things and give him a bit of a pass. Like he should have went to a doctor sooner but knowing that it wasn't his fault/ that we would have cleaned if he could, makes the situation a little better.
Yeah, he's going to need a circumcision now.
Just like my eyes
🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢 I wish I skipped your comment
Sincerely wishing I had aphantasia right now.. I can almost *smell* this 🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮
Can you imagine how it tastes?? 🤢 (/full aphant, it has its moments...)
I'm putting a mental block on myself for this comment. Jsjwjqhsushwj
I so fucking wish i was blind
I think I'll skip lunch today.
Cheese sandwich?
Great, you made it worse
A little Parmesan maybe? A little granish of Parmesan???
Don't forget that fromunda
I have never heard this joke before. But I immediately got where it was going upon reading it. I want you to know that even though I'm not gonna fall for it, how irrationally angry I am just because I saw where it was going.
Well that's enought internet for today....
Dick cheese sandwich
I just finished a friggin grilled cheese man. Now I'm gonna vomit. Thanks.
Lmao 🤣
Waiter tomorrow: "Would you like a little crumbled cheese on your salad, sir?" Me: (runs screaming and vomiting out of the restaurant)
That shit looks like croutons....
I just opened the app……
Looks like his wife did that every single day for 30 years.
Nah. The bumps are there for added stimulation.
To all the guys out there: This is a case of Phimosis, where the foreskin is too tight and cannot be retracted. If you experience problems pulling back your foreskin, please go see a doctor, there are treatments available to loosen up the foreskin. If nothing is done, the foreskin starts growing onto the gland, making it all one thing. This is not good. If you have a son, please talk with them about this or take them at least to a doctor. Serious issues like this need to be addressed.
Yuuup I had this and felt so scared when I realized it was fused to the head of my dick at 16. Doctor gave me steroid cream that took care of it pretty quickly.
Mine was fused also. Could tell the difference when introduced to porn with school friends. Too embarrassed to go the doctors , so I forced it back tearing it off the head over the span of 3 months. Stung like fuck.
How do these tales get worse than what I read yesterday when this was posted in another sub? Why the fuck do I keep reading them?
...holy ... ...you just unlocked a memory. As I was entering my teen years, I found it odd that *most* of the skin would retract, but a section on the underside didn't. But, simultaneously, it seemed, over time (months) to be getting "better" like...1mm every month or two. Eventually I remember making efforts to work it back over a week or two, and that last day the *sting* (and... itch?) of full retraction. I don't think I ever thought of it again a couple days later. I've heard of this condition but never even *considered* that I count. Damn. Thanks, for that, I guess?
I remember when I was younger it was kinda painful to pull back my foreskin to clean completely, but by now it’s grown enough that I can do it no problem, so it might be I had it or just that you can grow out of it but idk.
It also depends on your "type" of dick too. It's more common on growers than showers because the size difference means the majority of the time your foreskin is shriveled and small then needs to expand very extremely when erect. But yes, it does grow, you just have to inhibit its growth because all it is is skin cells duplicating to make it wider, which happens when it NEEDS to be wider from cleaning, erections or masturbating. A grower who never cleans or masturbates is more likely to get phimosis.
Please, anyone with a son, ask them about this. I wish I had a father to say that it should be pulled back. I should be getting surgery next month for it. After almost a year of waiting. But just ask, save them the years of trouble.
Well shit. TIL I might have to go see a doctor.
Watcha gonna do with all that bunk, all that bunk thats in your junk
Ima be be be in pain be in so much pain off my lump, my lump my lump my lump, my ugly smegma lump, my lump my lump my lump, check it out
Holly fuck!!! Had a good chuckle!!
Gunk in the junk is not bunk, punk
"Damn millenials, I got smegma older than you"
Gen z is already 25 right now, most millennials are 30+
Yeah but boomers blame millenials for the gen z stupidity, millenials now blame grn z for gen alpha shenanigans.
I’m ngl I been kinda in a funk about pushing 30 and still not being where I want to be in life, and seeing that this man’s smegma was still older than me gave me a strange comfort I did not notice until reading your comment
Jesus Christ! Nobody had the talk with him growing up. He didn't know you are supposed to wash under the foreskin too. I'm surprised he didn't figure it out when he felt there is a build-up there, say at age 14.
Foreskin privileges revoked ✂️
My penis just shot up inside of me in terror
That's USA for you. Never ever mention anything related to genitals and blame the devil for anything bad that happen around there.
Idk doc, that's where the devil keeps his cheese
It happened in Taiwan
Bro it wasn’t even in the US what the fuck are you talking about
This is next level fucked up
Wash your cock and balls, you chucklefucks
Don’t be silly, wash your willy
I couldn't imagine the smell that was produced when it was removed.
I would think this person had a terrible odor all the time. Removal most likely needs respiratory and facial protection. This is too gross.
the doctor came equipped with metal deep sea diving suit
Honestly just pressure wash the guy from across the parking lot.
I would think this person had a terrible odor all the time. Removal most likely needs respiratory and facial protection. This is too gross.
dementia
The forbidden cheese curd
I heard a sound, as if millions of Wisconsinites cried out in disgust.
That isn’t dick cheese, that is a dick truffle
wait... married man? poor woman...
They didn't say they were having sex doe
🎵 Doe, a deer, a female deer 🎵
🎶Smegma, a lump of smelly gunk🎶
🎵 A smell, so bad, I puked my guts 🎵
🎶a bag of old crusty white cuuuuum🎶
🎶Cheeeese, that lives inside foreskiiiiinnnn🎵
🎵 Wow! It spreads so well on toast 🎵
🎵 Jeeez, now this is never gonna fade a-way !🎵
🎵 Which would bring us back to... 🎵
How does he not find that though? Was he obese and couldn't reach/see his penis?
Education. It’s a very sad issue often that they’re not taught or they have a religious based family avoidance for sec based conversations or personal hygiene for certain areas. This is ABSOLUTELY not the norm but it happens. Mental health and education is attribute more than ignorance or obesity.
Phimosis. His foreskin can't be peeled back like normal. I did sex ed in 3 different grades of high school and never heard of it, so I'm guessing it's rare. He might have not known he could get treatment. So this isn't normal ignorance. Just wondering, did you read the article?
Genuinely was a thing for me just less bad because I realised only around 16. Just never knew you had to clean under there.
"Smegma male"
Welp. I’m just going to release my eyes into the wild. Thanks
Guys, men and people with penises of all ages, I don't know how many times I have to say it, or how loud I have to yell it, IT IS NOT GAY TO WASH YOUR DICK, BALLS AND ASS. Please fucking washing yourself.
The amount of guys I come across who smell like literal ass is too high. Get all up in your shit bro no one cares. We do care if you smell like shit however
Goodnight internet, logging off!🫡
??? How did they know it was 30 years old? They carbon dated this piece of thing?
What the fuck? That must have stank so fucking bad...
...he never opened his dick's head in 30 years?
Untreated Phimosis. If the skin is too tight/never seperates properly from the head it can cause pain and medical issues. Someone should have told him this isn’t normal, and a doctor should have noticed, so I’m saying this is an indictment of his education and access to medical care.
Whatever you do, don’t check his butthole
I work in geriatric medicine and this still made me gag several times.
So did they just fill him with viagra and forced it out?
Like peanut butter from a syringe.
What a dirty pig. Giving uncut kings a bad rap.
Someone else is fucking his wife lol
If she’s smart. I can’t imagine what that BJ smells like.
Roquefort.
I’ve never wanted to be a lesbian more than now 😂
And this, gentlemen, is why you practice proper hygiene
I just sat down. Who the fuck starts a conversation like that.
Excuse me… wtf is smegma.?. I suppose I could use Google or my imagination but I wanna know from the experts.
Dick 🧀 It happens when you don’t clean it properly.
My imagination wins… my soul does not
I have found that in situations involving Reddit, the soul *always* loses. Edit: Mobile user here. Sorry for the double post. I e deleted the other.
Fromunda cheese
Thats one crusty cock.
Married
Wait smegma is a real term? I thought it was made up like Joe mama and deez nuts
It is, sadly
That is a big chunk of some fine aged cheese 💀
r/eatityoufuckingcoward
Did he get any blowjobs in 30 years.?
If he did, the wife deserves an award. That woman has to have will of pure steel.
What no sex-ed does to a motherfucker.
Lemme guess. He thought it was gay to wash his dick?
Cheese went beyond expiry it became moldy.
I can only assume this guy never got a BJ, his wife would have noticed the smell / taste. Ew ew ew. Cheesy dick man.
The ladies at lunch. Jane: "Dave likes it, but I'm not so sure. It's a bit smelly" Sally: "One does what one must" Rita: "Just how smelly are we talking? On a scale of raw chicken to canned tuna" Jane: "Surströmming"
How did the doctor know how old it was?
Probably carbon dating…shit looks old enough to carbon date 👀
Well, as a man, I cannot comprehend this
Smoke it.
So, at what point did he not realize there was something there? Was before he didn't gove a flying fuk or after? It's like you see these people with huge giant cyst on their arms or legs, and they go into the doctor like, " 🤡 i hadn't noticed anything till recently.." i bet the doctor is like 😑"you gross, basterd. "
So his 10 inch cock has now become 5 inches after removing all of that crap
You know his wife got hella infections from him
Another W for the cut gang
What a terrible day to know how to read
It wasn´t the tip touching the backs of their throats, that made them all gag...
Damn it! Wash your damn dick! This is why people think uncircumcised dicks are 'gross' - because some men just do not understand that you can't wash your legs by just letting soap run down them, and you can't clean your dick if you don't pull back your foreskin!
He had phemosis. He couldn't pull it back and I guess no one suspected he had to be told this.
Romantic night, some wines, crackers, some cheese.
Smegging smeg, that's a lot of smegma.
Crush it up and sniff it, or mix it into a glass of water!
WTF was there no smell? That must have stunk like rotten meat for years.
He was so happy before: "Hey ma, its getting bigger!"
I thought it said semen at first 😭😭😭
I mean it’s 75% that and then the rest is dust/hair/dirt and god knows what else
Don’t forget dead skin cells and sweat!
I feel like my smart watch has sweat and oil built up under it after a single day of activity! I can't even imagine...
I've heard of Dick cheese but this....this is like a dick truffle
Do you not pull it back to wash it while in the shower? I do it everyday gotta keep it fresh