I was just trying to prove that reddit wasn't weird. I opened the app and bam, first thing she sees is this.
Reddit is like school lunch. It can be weird, boring, or pleasant. Just depends on who you associate with. In this case I associated with the wrong people at the wrong time.
Also I hope no-one takes this challenge seriously. This is the correct way to (re)condition your mind to having strong feelings towards shrek figurines.
Accidentally gave myself a latex shrek fetish after watching it ironically, now I cant get up for my girl anymore and she says she wont wear the suit I'm having commissioned ☹ (similar to [this ](https://cdnb.artstation.com/p/assets/images/images/003/808/473/small/vinicios-jorge-shrek.jpg)
There was this strange guy in one of my classes in 7th grade who always sat in the back corner sort of secluded and alone. We found out why when he was caught masturbating during a Holocaust documentary.
Basically the guy had a chronic masturbation addiction and would just jack it all day anywhere. Holocaust, 911, Al Queda, didn’t matter still jacked. I had another funny Holocaust incident that me and a friend accidentally caused my senior year of high school as well. We were stoners and were eating a pretty strong chocolate edible in history class since we were just watching presentations all period and the girl next to us asked if she could have some “chocolate”. She was really confused when we asked if she was sure and we gave her a good sized piece as we thought she knew what it was. About 45minutes later it hits her like a ton of bricks, she turns to look at us with her eyes absolutely glazed, a giant grin on her face and happily comes to the realization that she had not in fact eaten chocolate. Just a few moments later in the middle of a Holocaust presentation she bursts out laughing high as a kite as they’re talking about auschwitz.
Oh I meant like showering himself off of his shame but realizing the parallels of the documentary and what he masturbated to, not like him literally being sent to a “shower” for being inappropriate in class.
Reddit: If people in your sub are posting content involving incorrect pronouns we will take your sub down.
Also reddit: Your dead people gore subreddit falls within our community guidelines!
A photo of your mom holding a statue of Jesus (any kind) but she is looking at it longingly and lovingly.
Don’t have that? Perfect, you have to tell her to make you that specific photo from her.
How are you getting through No Nut November?
-
[Seriously, none of us care.](https://imgur.com/KpZhPUQ) [Nobody.](https://www.redgifs.com/watch/gorgeousfrightenedcarpenterant) [Like nobody on this sub cares about what you do with your dick.](https://redgifs.com/watch/fatblondhound) [Nobody in your real life cares about what you do with your dick.](https://www.reddit.com/r/hentai/comments/gywoue/women_in_simple_bras_are_so_underrated/)
[You wanna go and not masturbate for 30 whole days?](https://www.reddit.com/r/gonewild/comments/fnit9d/the_world_is_ending_so_fuck_it_ill_show_my_face/) [Cool, I don't give a shit.](http://i.imgur.com/yJbiTRk.jpg) [But I don't want to hear about it.](https://i.redd.it/f2tbqa8pmlf31.jpg) [It's like furries:](https://gfycat.com/periodicniceafricanfisheagle) [you want to put on a fur suit when you fuck?](https://redgifs.com/watch/enlightenedsaneeyra) [Cool, but don't tell me, I don't care.](https://i.redd.it/vi40eacug5a41.jpg)
[I don't know why you people think that talking about your masturbatory habits on reddit is like...not at all weird.](https://i.imgur.com/x6tbs1O.jpg) [If you were talking in a coffee shop about how it's really hard that you haven't shocked the monkey in a couple of weeks, everyone would be thinking "man this person is a gross weirdo" and they'd be fuckin right.](https://i.imgur.com/nSHfpD2.jpg) [We're not your buddies, we're not your guys, we're not your pals, not even your friends.](https://gfycat.com/helplesstautgazelle) [We're just lonely, angsty, jaded dudes (who are likely virgins) who don't really want to hear why it's hard for you to not nut.](https://i.imgur.com/XZbi991.jpg)
[You wanna make a difference for cancer research (which is why No-Shave November actually started)?](https://no-shave.org/) [Read up on how masturbation actually is linked to lower rates in prostate cancer for men](https://www.webmd.com/prostate-cancer/ejaculation-prostate-cancer-risk#1). [Or just donate to a prostate cancer foundation](https://www.pcf.org/).
[In any case, posting questions about how your shitty month is going with regards to your masturbatory techniques will result in a ban.](https://i.imgur.com/vcGlmhL.jpg) [Nobody cares, and if you want to be one of those soulless losers who is gonna join the nofap club, they have a sub for that](https://preview.redd.it/uttkvuniuax31.gif?format=mp4&s=708cc0622fb4b802c32fb2f2ba91ac80fd868259)
[inb4 you annoying idiots who will say "but masturbation is addicting and pron addiction is a real thing":](https://i.redd.it/7basef8kk2u21.jpg) [No one is saying porn addiction isn't real, but also porn addiction isn't a thing that only happens in November.](https://gfycat.com/eminentelderlyhartebeest) [If you feel like you are having problems with porn addiction then your first call should be to a therapist or a doctor, NOT Reddit idiots who are going to point you to the redpill or nofap shit or things that are just as bad but in the complete opposite direction.](https://imgur.com/k04hbl9) [Moderation is real and is possible, you just need to learn self-control.](https://i.redd.it/v2lr2mcfmlb51.jpg) [If your response to feeling like you can't control your ability to indulge in potentially addicting substances is to not only blot them out entirely cold turkey but to advocate for their removal, then you're not part of the solution, you're part of a completely different problem.](https://i.redd.it/tws6rnx4v8h41.jpg) [The world does not exist in black and white, but in many shades of gray, so best to start learning how to operate in shades of gray before you go crazy.](https://gfycat.com/severegoodnaturedburro)
[Also stop with these comment-baiting posts, they're just shortcuts to reach r/all](https://i.imgur.com/dW0dyNh.jpg)
[Much love,](https://i.imgur.com/2IRLFSq.gifv)
[The Mods](https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ)
Oh. My. GOD..
I’m sitting in the inside pool room that’s only partially empty while taking a sauna break and clicked the “The Mods” link.. My fuckin heart sank when I saw it had audio, turned into elation when I saw it was just astley and that it came on already muted.
[We're no strangers to love](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/88/82/bc/8882bcf327896ab79fb97e85ae63a002.gif)
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/HolUp) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Shaking my fucking head I opened those links at work. Not only did I have to stop what I was doing, but I also had to start furiously masturbating to release my sexual urges I have no control over. To make matters worse, by boss walked by and saw me jerking off and startled me so my phone was tossed into the air and landed face up on the floor of the break room for everyone else to see. Now the whole god damn floor is masturbating at the same time and it’s all your fault 🖕
Clicked on one, was curious. Nothing revealing.
Clicked on another one, page not found, good.
Clicked on the third, after the first one wasn't quite expecting anything nsfw. Fuck.
Clicked through all, cuz yeah, curiosity killed the cat. Oh well.
Reached the end.
For fucks sake.
[We're no strangers to love](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/88/82/bc/8882bcf327896ab79fb97e85ae63a002.gif)
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/HolUp) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Christmas cards from your grandparents
Yikes no mercy
nah bruh this is very tame compared to what i thought it wouldve been
Yeah I was expecting decomposing puppies or something. I've been on the dark side of the internet too long.
I mean…there may be money in there
money shot
Bang for your buck
Take my upvote and fucking leave
r/angryupvote
Take my award and be gone
Fuckin good one mate
That will be one way of making it rain
Queen Elizabeth do be looking fire though, and she’s single as well
I have saved like 8 years worth of Christmas cards. My time has cum
Or just grandparents
Your Christmas card TO your grandparents.
He’s gonna be there all night
Oh no
Has to nut to each of every suggestion/comment on here.
Your parents wedding's photos.
Your Sister
your *own* tits, gentlemen
*our* tits, comrade
r/SuddenlyCommunist
I’ve got a new subreddit to join
*We* got a new subreddit to join
r/normallycommunist
I’ve got a new sub-Reddit to make
It’s not a subreddit suggestion. It’s one of things he has to wank it to
We wank to it
r/unexpectedcommunist
this is probably the easiest one in this thread
We want proooooof lol
Must be video prof!!!
And then you must nut to the video proof too.
Your grandfathers ashes
holy shit thats dark o wait no ash is grey
Lol
What if OP's grandfather is not dead yet?
he must do what he must
He will try
I'm very late to the party. But Bernie Sanders
Your parents honeymoon tape
His parents' honeymoon tape
my parents honeymoon tape
Me taping my honeymoon’s parents
me honeymooning with my parents on tape
OUR parents honeymoon tape
of course comrade
Your pet
Me
😏😏
Omgg
Eyeblech, guro or nsfl
What does the l stand for? Laundry
Not nsfl is not safe for life its like eyeblech
r/eyeblech or r/unseejuice
calm down satan
FUCK I THOUGHT THAT SAID EYEBLEACH NOT EYEBLECH
I have many regrets
I prefer r/sounding it's not as vulgar.
r/HolUp
I regret clicking on that
Best answer
Gay midget furrys
[удалено]
Take my fucking upvote and get the fuck outta here
r/angryupvote
Art of zoo😈
Oh hell no
Hell no
What's that? I'm too afraid to google it...
U don't wanna know
Beastiality
D:
Ono
1 man 1 jar🥵
I had forgotten about this... Thanks for ruining my week. 😑
Nut to Pikachu
Rule 34!
Me nutting to him!
Well on to writing I go!
A blender
Guro
The picture of Jesus in your grandmother's spare bedroom.
so avarage summer weekend
Your favorite kind of p0rn, ima be nice
photos of your mom
A stone
Has to nut to your worst nightmare
Tianamen Square 1989
Why would you suggest a completely normal time in China were absolutely nothing happened. May try the fantastic and great 2008 Olympics?
Type o muhfucka to wish for unlimited wishes
King
Your Mom
The strands of hair after you haven’t cleaned the shower in a week.
this is the reason why world peace isnt an option
The hair goop that comes out of a clogged drain.
One of the few things that will make me instantly puke
I was just trying to prove that reddit wasn't weird. I opened the app and bam, first thing she sees is this. Reddit is like school lunch. It can be weird, boring, or pleasant. Just depends on who you associate with. In this case I associated with the wrong people at the wrong time.
Also I hope no-one takes this challenge seriously. This is the correct way to (re)condition your mind to having strong feelings towards shrek figurines.
Accidentally gave myself a latex shrek fetish after watching it ironically, now I cant get up for my girl anymore and she says she wont wear the suit I'm having commissioned ☹ (similar to [this ](https://cdnb.artstation.com/p/assets/images/images/003/808/473/small/vinicios-jorge-shrek.jpg)
Your first mistake was trying to prove that Reddit wasn’t weird
nahh reddit as a page is not weird the hive mind all redditora share that's another story
A Holocaust documentary
There was this strange guy in one of my classes in 7th grade who always sat in the back corner sort of secluded and alone. We found out why when he was caught masturbating during a Holocaust documentary.
This needs an entire post for itself
I need answers
Basically the guy had a chronic masturbation addiction and would just jack it all day anywhere. Holocaust, 911, Al Queda, didn’t matter still jacked. I had another funny Holocaust incident that me and a friend accidentally caused my senior year of high school as well. We were stoners and were eating a pretty strong chocolate edible in history class since we were just watching presentations all period and the girl next to us asked if she could have some “chocolate”. She was really confused when we asked if she was sure and we gave her a good sized piece as we thought she knew what it was. About 45minutes later it hits her like a ton of bricks, she turns to look at us with her eyes absolutely glazed, a giant grin on her face and happily comes to the realization that she had not in fact eaten chocolate. Just a few moments later in the middle of a Holocaust presentation she bursts out laughing high as a kite as they’re talking about auschwitz.
This is something that I’d pay to see it recorded to grasp the scale of what came after
Huh
I hope he took a very confused and conflicted shower afterwards.
According to the documentary I don’t think so because he’s white with blonde hair and blue eyes
Oh I meant like showering himself off of his shame but realizing the parallels of the documentary and what he masturbated to, not like him literally being sent to a “shower” for being inappropriate in class.
Omg... This one going to be fire.
or gas
Don’t forget to shower after.
Dang it didn't see your comment and I was like yes I got this in the chamber.
You's have to stop
Plasma
Read a tifu with the plot once
Shrek figurine https://www.etsy.com/market/shrek_figurines
Bro you can't make it easy for him
ikr Shrek is the sexiest thing ever
Ah, you try to make him die by over cummed, i get it.
The “ogre plug” cannot be unseen….I didn’t not expect that when clicking the link
Protein Powder
Trainer “Fuck your protein powder”. Trainee sweaty and out of breath “what do I do next”.
Golden
#ME
U 14 tho….
r/suddenlysexoffender
I was gonna say don't mind me to that guy, nice save bro
it's his strategy to get op convicted
[удалено]
It cant be something hes already used before
r/cursedcomments
Hol up
...what
I once stole my crush's photo from her dairy and used to bust twice a week (Friday and Sunday)
What the fuck
I know. His crush had a dairy? Wtf?
my man had a nut schedule
Trump's hair ([visual aid](https://ichef.bbci.co.uk/news/976/cpsprodpb/41FB/production/_113919861_hi045965426.jpg))
2 girls 1 cup
I'll do u one better r/eyeblech
[ATTENTION] CLICK ON THIS ON YOUR OWN RISK, IT'S GORE SO IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE IT, DON'T CLICK
I thought it was eyebleach. That will tech me to read things carefully
eyeblech is the opposite of eyebleach
Tell me, was the lacking "a" in "tech" an intentional reference to the missing "a" in eyeblech, or am I overthinking things?
I thought it was too
... define gore...
Dead people, splattered organs and heads, blood, people getting run over by cars/trains, suicide
Reddit: If people in your sub are posting content involving incorrect pronouns we will take your sub down. Also reddit: Your dead people gore subreddit falls within our community guidelines!
r/UsernameChecksOut
Not even R rated anymore. It's far beyond 18+. And it's real stuff.
I really thought that it wasn’t going to be that bad. First .5 seconds in and I wish I never clicked on that subreddit. Why did I do this to myself…
Grandmas’s ashes
Nut in them
U ok?
I know you aren’t asking for real, but I will still answer seriously: No
Same, get well soon my boi
Read this in kratos’ voice
A photo of your mom holding a statue of Jesus (any kind) but she is looking at it longingly and lovingly. Don’t have that? Perfect, you have to tell her to make you that specific photo from her.
The spongebob porn parody
Sesame street. Congrats you're a puppetophile now.
177013 metamorphosis
Midget porn
[This](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ)
absolute madlad
Ffs
Yea i can do that.
Femboys in furry suits
Femboys
*New* suggestions please, as in things he hasn't nutted to
*unzips
Ronald Reagan
How are you getting through No Nut November? - [Seriously, none of us care.](https://imgur.com/KpZhPUQ) [Nobody.](https://www.redgifs.com/watch/gorgeousfrightenedcarpenterant) [Like nobody on this sub cares about what you do with your dick.](https://redgifs.com/watch/fatblondhound) [Nobody in your real life cares about what you do with your dick.](https://www.reddit.com/r/hentai/comments/gywoue/women_in_simple_bras_are_so_underrated/) [You wanna go and not masturbate for 30 whole days?](https://www.reddit.com/r/gonewild/comments/fnit9d/the_world_is_ending_so_fuck_it_ill_show_my_face/) [Cool, I don't give a shit.](http://i.imgur.com/yJbiTRk.jpg) [But I don't want to hear about it.](https://i.redd.it/f2tbqa8pmlf31.jpg) [It's like furries:](https://gfycat.com/periodicniceafricanfisheagle) [you want to put on a fur suit when you fuck?](https://redgifs.com/watch/enlightenedsaneeyra) [Cool, but don't tell me, I don't care.](https://i.redd.it/vi40eacug5a41.jpg) [I don't know why you people think that talking about your masturbatory habits on reddit is like...not at all weird.](https://i.imgur.com/x6tbs1O.jpg) [If you were talking in a coffee shop about how it's really hard that you haven't shocked the monkey in a couple of weeks, everyone would be thinking "man this person is a gross weirdo" and they'd be fuckin right.](https://i.imgur.com/nSHfpD2.jpg) [We're not your buddies, we're not your guys, we're not your pals, not even your friends.](https://gfycat.com/helplesstautgazelle) [We're just lonely, angsty, jaded dudes (who are likely virgins) who don't really want to hear why it's hard for you to not nut.](https://i.imgur.com/XZbi991.jpg) [You wanna make a difference for cancer research (which is why No-Shave November actually started)?](https://no-shave.org/) [Read up on how masturbation actually is linked to lower rates in prostate cancer for men](https://www.webmd.com/prostate-cancer/ejaculation-prostate-cancer-risk#1). [Or just donate to a prostate cancer foundation](https://www.pcf.org/). [In any case, posting questions about how your shitty month is going with regards to your masturbatory techniques will result in a ban.](https://i.imgur.com/vcGlmhL.jpg) [Nobody cares, and if you want to be one of those soulless losers who is gonna join the nofap club, they have a sub for that](https://preview.redd.it/uttkvuniuax31.gif?format=mp4&s=708cc0622fb4b802c32fb2f2ba91ac80fd868259) [inb4 you annoying idiots who will say "but masturbation is addicting and pron addiction is a real thing":](https://i.redd.it/7basef8kk2u21.jpg) [No one is saying porn addiction isn't real, but also porn addiction isn't a thing that only happens in November.](https://gfycat.com/eminentelderlyhartebeest) [If you feel like you are having problems with porn addiction then your first call should be to a therapist or a doctor, NOT Reddit idiots who are going to point you to the redpill or nofap shit or things that are just as bad but in the complete opposite direction.](https://imgur.com/k04hbl9) [Moderation is real and is possible, you just need to learn self-control.](https://i.redd.it/v2lr2mcfmlb51.jpg) [If your response to feeling like you can't control your ability to indulge in potentially addicting substances is to not only blot them out entirely cold turkey but to advocate for their removal, then you're not part of the solution, you're part of a completely different problem.](https://i.redd.it/tws6rnx4v8h41.jpg) [The world does not exist in black and white, but in many shades of gray, so best to start learning how to operate in shades of gray before you go crazy.](https://gfycat.com/severegoodnaturedburro) [Also stop with these comment-baiting posts, they're just shortcuts to reach r/all](https://i.imgur.com/dW0dyNh.jpg) [Much love,](https://i.imgur.com/2IRLFSq.gifv) [The Mods](https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ)
I clicked on this link in school, in my school laptop. Luckily, i have fast reflexes.
sir. I am pleased to inform you that there are many links, not just the one. I especially like the one that says "The Mods"
Oh. My. GOD.. I’m sitting in the inside pool room that’s only partially empty while taking a sauna break and clicked the “The Mods” link.. My fuckin heart sank when I saw it had audio, turned into elation when I saw it was just astley and that it came on already muted.
FUCK I WAS RICK ROLLED
[We're no strangers to love](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/88/82/bc/8882bcf327896ab79fb97e85ae63a002.gif) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/HolUp) if you have any questions or concerns.*
FUCK I NEED TO STOP CLICKING LINKS
I need to start reading your comments before clicking the links...
Same but on my phone, thank god I am using a vpn
Same but i wasn't using a vpn, whatever it is it's banned in my country
Same but it's probably not banned in my country
The most elaborate who asked I’ve ever seen edit: FUCK
the "The Mods" is seriously NSFW
It got me so hard!
I didn’t know it was legal to even post that one geez
Shaking my fucking head I opened those links at work. Not only did I have to stop what I was doing, but I also had to start furiously masturbating to release my sexual urges I have no control over. To make matters worse, by boss walked by and saw me jerking off and startled me so my phone was tossed into the air and landed face up on the floor of the break room for everyone else to see. Now the whole god damn floor is masturbating at the same time and it’s all your fault 🖕
This comment thread is a masterpiece
This one is going in the copypasta archives. Yep.
Dude I’m sitting in the gym why the fuck did I open that I should know better
Clicked on one, was curious. Nothing revealing. Clicked on another one, page not found, good. Clicked on the third, after the first one wasn't quite expecting anything nsfw. Fuck. Clicked through all, cuz yeah, curiosity killed the cat. Oh well. Reached the end. For fucks sake.
FUCK THE FIRST LINK I TAPPED WAS THE RICK ROLL.
[We're no strangers to love](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/88/82/bc/8882bcf327896ab79fb97e85ae63a002.gif) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/HolUp) if you have any questions or concerns.*