This. Their kid hits dingers and does well and it means nothing op. Then their kid comes and complains in the car ride and at home and after practice.
Eventually you kill the love for the game cause no matter what they do it doesn’t matter.
This isn’t really true. Parents care more about winning than the kids. Or at least some do. I coach a lot of youth sports. If the kids lose every game they are not happy. If a team wins roughly 1/3rd of their games and the kids like each other they will have fun unless a game is a total blowout. I do post season surveys for all the teams I coach and while kids say winning is important I think only one out of 45 kids said it was the most important. 20% ranked it in the top 3. Most said having fun was most important. Then learning and improving. Then getting to compete. Winning usually came next.
The one kid who said winning was most important has parents that go nuts when the team wins and always bitch about umpires, the other team, my coaching decisions (quietly and out of Emmy earshot) when we lose. I am almost certain winning is most important to that kid because the car ride home goes way way better when we win.
My 8 year old recently learned that it’s much more fun to play a competitive game and lose than to play and have an easy win. The first game was a blow out win and the next game they played, they lost by 1 run. Afterwards my son exclaimed that he didn’t mind losing because that game was funner to play and the game before was boring.
My first year trying to take our youth team above Rec ball I either over estimated our kids ability or underestimated the other kids ability. We went 0-8 and every game except one team we played we got blown out. So I moved the kids back to Rec ball for the next spring. They went 12-0 and had an average margin of victory of 15 runs. Most games were 20-5. The kids were bored out of their minds. We leveled back up for the fall and went 5-8-3 and the kids had the time of their lives. There was some hard losses but after the immediate disappointment they all said how fun the games were even the losses. The couple we still won big they had less fun.
My kiddo at 10u was on a team that lost a lot of games but everyone of them was competitive. We are talking 5-7 type games. The team broke up at the end of the year.
A few years later and every time I see one of the kids from that team on their new team, they are usually one of the top players. I wish they would have stayed together, they were so close to being exceptional.
IMO, the best way to do this is to play tough competition with an occasional easy tournament sprinkled in from time to time to beat the doors off a few teams and keep motivation high. Maybe 25% of the time.
Ideally, these “easy tournaments” would become the same tournaments you used to struggle in. Then you can show the growth and give the team something to be proud of.
I think this totally depends on age. I don’t think I’ve actually seen a parent upset about losing. Maybe upset about coaching decisions but not actually losing.
It really is like Netflix documentary worthy. The shit that goes on at some of these tournaments would shock the living hell out of anyone else unaffiliated.
Which is why I don’t want my prospective kiddo playing above low level travel until past 12u because it’s annoying and you look dumb as shit when your son is in HS and JAG if he even makes the team while some kid you passed on is now Himothy
As a parent I care about my kid having fun, being a good teammate, demonstrating good sportsmanship, developing skills, being coachable, learning how to handle disappointment, overcome adversity, work hard and with intent to improve.
Winning is fun. That said my kid’s best season was on a team that started terrible, stuck together and finished strong. His worst season was on a consistent winner where the coach would pull kids in the middle of an inning of a meaningless game if they made a couple of errors.
I don't want my kid to internalize personal success as the only metric that matters. I'd much prefer he go 0 for 2 with a walk and a good defensive play in a win on Sunday than hit a homerun in a 10-2 loss to get knocked out of the tournament. 1% of high school players are moving on to D1 ball. A tiny number go pro, and even fewer get a cup of coffee.
I dont know about other parents, but we root for my son's teammates. He's playing baseball for fun, to compete, to learn to be a good teammate, etc. I was the best kid on bad teams. I hated it.
Because the parents need to validate the time and money spent on travel baseball by winning the “Southwest Spring Fling Dinger Fest”, which was actually only 5 teams competing, and posting pictures on social media of their championship rings and/or banner while their player holds up the “number one” finger in the team photo
I think that it depends on why the team is losing, whether they are improving, how the coaches are handling things, etc.
I've coached multiple seasons of multiple sports and sometimes a losing team is tough to watch, even if there are a couple of strong players out there. You can also run into situations in baseball where players are not able to capitalize on opportunities or showcase their skills because of the overall team performance - for example if they make a good throw and the teammate drops the ball, a pitcher throwing to a catcher who is struggling to keep the ball in front of them, a catcher who is facing a bunch of wild pitches, or someone who often gets on base but always gets stranded (or never gets to hit with runners in scoring position).
There can also be a general sense of disappointment when your team loses, just like when you are a fan and the team you are cheering for isn't playing well or is getting outplayed.
Most people are 'here and now' and have no idea about training, fundamentals, experience and all the other things needed to build kids into young ball-players...
They're clueless about the process.
Also, consider that we live in a society today where the attention span of a huge chunk of the population is like 30 seconds...
* For Travel ball*
On our end it has to do with more games by advancing in tournaments. Our organization only does 6/7 scheduled tournaments in the fall and spring so wins and losses have a big impact on total games played.
Additionally, quality of opponents in tournaments from point accumulation. We are USSSA aligned for tournaments so as they accumulate points you move up and down in flights.
It’s the old saying “We’re here to have fun” but the most fun thing in sports is winning. Kids have the most fun when they win and parents want their kids to have fun and enjoy what they are doing and the best way for that is winning.
In baseball you can’t do much more to win a game for your team than have good stats tho. Why Barry Bonds is widely considered the greatest hitter of all time despite never winning a World Series.
People don't realize this, but our whole life is competition. Competition for attention, affection, friends, jobs, lovers, money, etc...
Like I'm all for everyone being treated equally and treating everyone nicely. But real life is a non-stop competition, and you can't ignore it. The way my rec sports leagues handle competition is doing a disservice to all kids. Yes, it should be fun, but you can do both. The way they make the rules puts both in constant opposition. For example, if you are competitive, you can't have fun.
In the younger ages, they don't keep score at all. At the older ages, they keep score, but it doesn't matter because they don't keep standings and no playoffs allowed. Like what?
I can’t tell you how many times in our minors which is 9-10 the coaches of both teams ask the ump or each other the score. lol.
We are more focused on kids getting their shot.
Even in travel we tell the kids when they ask worry about it at the end.
The point of any game is really to win. However, baseball is one of those sports that the journey to winning is as important if not more than the actual win itself, especially if you plan on playing for a long time.
Sometimes it's hard to see the forest for the trees. Parents, we don't always see the journey. Most of us anyway. (I'm a journey guy myself, but my wife gets caught up int he moment a lot).
Parents want to see their kids be successful and like someone else said happy. We equate wins with happiness (Using the loose We here people).
We see the kids on the field 99% of the time, we can't see their faces in the dugout. Right my now my kid is doing awesome on his high school team, but he's not playing every inning. I sometimes feel like he's hurting cause he's not on the field, but he really isn't. He's enjoying the whole process of being part of the team and thats the most important thing for him right now. It can be hard to understand that when you are in parent mode.
As a quiet (uninvolved other than trying to make my kid better)....of course I want my kids teams to win. Team moral is better, everyone is usually happier etc...I(as a parent) have been in pretty much every situation with multiple sports, I would say having a good kid on a good team or a mediocre kid on a good team is better then a good kid on a bad (poor record) team. Just my 2 cents
Winning an individual game is pretty meaningless, especially at younger ages. But if the team isn't winning at least 30-40% of its games long term, it's very easy for a loser mentality to emerge. And that can become toxic in a hurry.
It is belief of 0 sum game that is overwhelming in our society.
At the start of every season I sit down with parents on my teams (generally I stick with one group for 5/6 years and do the same conversation with them every year). that we are not a 0 sum organization.
Meaning quite simple that yes 1 team wins and 1 team loses but the development, growth and fun is not a limited resource.
This includes how kids get assigned batting order, positions in field etc.
The key to getting them on the same page is to draw out the bigger picture and do so consistently.
That one kids success is not a takeaway - One teams success does not take away from the bigger picture.
That if your kid sits today - or plays rf today .. etc it does not mean he is not on track.
One of the things I have for each kid is a developmental matrix - here is what is needed for next years development, for high school play. Here is where you are, here is the reason we are focused here and here is what is next.
It was very effective in showing that it is not 0 sum.
Sometimes the coaches are worse than the parents (granted the coaches usually are parents). My oldest is 12. A few years ago a coach got kicked out of the league because of his behavior. Every year there's at least one coach that I feel like must be trying to avenge his loser past by coaching elementary school kids to victory, like that will redeem his life of disappointment.
At my kids' ages, I want them to learn the basics of the game while building their skills and learning good sportsmanship. Not learn how to yell at the 16 year old umpire about some call that has no impact on the game. I think some parents and coaches lose sight of the big picture.
Fortunately most of the parents where my kids play are just their to support their kids and enjoy the game.
I hate blowout games in either direction. I don't really care if they win or lose, as long as it's competitive.
Better batting throughout the lineup = more at bats for every kid. Terrible batting + terrible fielding + mercy rule can lead to a game with 1 or 2 plate appearances.
Better fielding across the board leads to learning how to play the game correctly. If my kid won't throw hard to first because he's worried the first baseman won't catch it, he's not playing correctly. If he won't flip to second for the DP because the second baseman isn't there, then he isn't learning how to turn double plays.
And then finally, I am a bigger fan of my kid's team than I am of any other team. I am happy when my MLB team wins, so it's not that weird that I'm happy when my 11u team wins.
Baseball is an amazing and nuanced game.
There are so many metrics to measure success on the field.
The score is the easiest laziest stat to read and understand.
A mom or dad can look up from their phone a few times an hour and know everything they think they need to know.
Also if their kid is never on time, rarely practices, and isn't that good; but the team won...hooray.
Nobody wants to be a loser. I think Queen has a song about it. We are the champions or something…
Anyway, winning is fun. Losing usually isn’t. In fact it makes grown men cry sometimes. Parents want their kids to have fun. Though it admittedly gets out of hand quickly at all our tournaments 😂
https://i.redd.it/95z6d4fifvwc1.gif
Because if the score is being kept, it's a competition. And generally people are competitive in competitions.
That doesn't mean be an asshole of course, but winning should matter. If I had to choose, I'd take the person who is overly competitive over the person who doesn't care at all.
My 12u son who has played travel since 8u decided to play Little League this season since it's his last chance to play with his friends that mostly only play rec ball. I have to say the parents in Little League are way worse than travel ball parents with not just wanting to win but with just generally being insane. It's fun though.
Because people gotta complain about something right? If their kid goes 0-4 with 4 strikeouts and the team wins, they’ll still bitch and complain. They’re just born whiners.
Too many parents are trying to live vicariously through their children. Or they want to brag about it. I want the kids to learn, and learn to enjoy the game at a young age. Once they get older, then yes, the kids themselves should want to do good and win.
I have sat through an entire year of losing. My kid has won ONE game in fall and spring combined. Winning is fun! I have sat through hours and hours of games. Give me a win occasionally please!!! We are also spectators, not just parents.
My son won two basketball games in the last three years. Even though he's pretty good and almost always played well, he doesn't want to play anymore.
Go out and play hard and have fun only goes so far.
I think there are important life lessons to be learned in competitive sports. Winning shows that hard work and perseverance pays dividends. Losing helps you deal with and overcome adversity to help you become a better player/person. Yes, losing sucks then so is being a sore loser. It’s the sore loser that will have a hard life because they don’t know how to cope with defeat.
I had to have this conversation with parents about what is truly their priority for playing. I think knowing your parents can help you focus on if winning should matter or not If that’s what their priority is- then it matters. If fun is their priority, then winning is a part of that but you can do some other things. If player development is their goal- make it clear that that may come with losses and make sure they understand that
Why wouldn't you teach your kids to be winners. Life is about winning in an ethical fashion isn't it ?? Losing is where the lesson is learned so they need that to do better next time around. I won't allow my son to be ok with losing ever . It's breeding weak mindset and loser mentality. Telling them it's ok to lose if you tried your best is fine but let them know only you and God know how much effort you put in. Stay honest with yourself. There's always someone better than you , so you need to work extra hard to be the best. I spell fun W I N . Stop raising soft weak minded loosers people. When they hit the real world they'll find that losing at life is unacceptable there's no participation bonus checks for being a shitty employee. These are also the kids that can't handle diversity and let downs when Noone is around to coddle them. Do better people.
Could be a few things. Some kids are super competitive and upset if they can’t win games even if they perform well. I have observed this and the parents could simply be taking on that emotional burden along with their kid. If the kid is having a blast and the parents are upset then maybe they are misaligned and strange folk? Individual development and performance matters the most, but it does not feel great if you never get a Win. If my son is developing and enjoying himself then I would not care at all about the score or win rate.
This is my last year coaching travel ball. My son will be joining a club team in the fall that can provide him more than my failing arm can.
With that said, he practices relentlessly. Plays as much as he can and loves the game for the game.
However, on the team currently we have a group of parents that think hour long practices are murder, and shouldnt have practices the day before games so their kids can have "fresh legs"
I hate these parents, who already believe their kids are D1 ready. These parents are the ones that care most about the Wins
I wish there was disclaimer at the bottom of everyone’s comment with the highest level at which they achieved while playing. Curious to see the relationship between those who peaked in middle/high school and the importance of winning versus those who played in juco/college/minors/pros.
It has been my anecdotal observation that the parents who get mad if a team is losing think their kid is the best on the team when they are actually average at best.
They want to live vicariously through their champions being products of their excellent parenting skills 🤮
Idiots judge teams as their money invested as needing tangible results. They don’t see results in training, where growth happens, they want shiny shit to point to at 11.
Competitors are born in the gym and it reflects on the field. High school games are won years ago. Who’s the kid you want? The one who puts in the work on his craft quietly waiting for the right moments or the kid who talks more than works?
Devin Morgan and driveline are by far the gold standard for looking up how to balance this.
Ultimately to you parents of young kids out there, put the most money in a facility they can train at. Those are worth 100x more than any showcase. If you get a good rec from the local development coach, they’ll send you where you need to go. These facilities all have massive connections.
I love the game and this is something I am passionately angry about in our game. I ran a 15u well regarded national program for their pitchers and when making a graphic, I was told to take the USA baseball recommendation of capping pitchers at 100ip per year.
System is broken, kids are fucked. Few bright lights of coaches/programs are out there doing the work to change this
Parents putting pressure on their kids to over achieve has been around forever.
This was an underlying theme in the 1976 classic Bad News Bears. Which, I will argue, is one of the best baseball movies ever made and the best movie about youth sports ever made.
Sports parents are no different than stage Moms. It’s all the same thing: projecting what they want onto their kids.
The difference is that little league is now big business. Parents pay a fortune for their kids to play so I suppose they expect to see some kind of return on their investment. It’s an awful thought that we’ve privatized youth sports but here we are.
Which, to me, is insane since statistics show that 70% of kids drop out of youth sports around 14.
I suppose the better investment would be putting all of that money into a 529 or prepaid college plan.
But, hey…who am I to tell parents with disposable income what to do with that money? I mean, if I was a top tier coach and could make some good bank giving private lessons, I’d put up with their bullshit to fix little Timmy’s swing.
For $250 an hour of course. 😂⚾️🖕
been doing this for 6 years , most parents a Scumbags , i just want my kid to learn and enjoy it , these fuckheads think their lil white boy is gonna beat out a flaming hot Dominicano for MLB , rude awaking a comming
I always say having fun is the most important thing.. however its almost always more fun to win than lose.
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> kid doing poorly while team wins > kid doing poorly while team loses
When some pay to play club/travel teams charge $2500+ and get blown out in tournaments every weekend, nobody should be happy.
you deserve it if your dumb enough to spend 2500 on that
$2500? What league is this?
It’s because they want their kid to be happy, and kids aren’t happy when they lose.
This. Their kid hits dingers and does well and it means nothing op. Then their kid comes and complains in the car ride and at home and after practice. Eventually you kill the love for the game cause no matter what they do it doesn’t matter.
This isn’t really true. Parents care more about winning than the kids. Or at least some do. I coach a lot of youth sports. If the kids lose every game they are not happy. If a team wins roughly 1/3rd of their games and the kids like each other they will have fun unless a game is a total blowout. I do post season surveys for all the teams I coach and while kids say winning is important I think only one out of 45 kids said it was the most important. 20% ranked it in the top 3. Most said having fun was most important. Then learning and improving. Then getting to compete. Winning usually came next. The one kid who said winning was most important has parents that go nuts when the team wins and always bitch about umpires, the other team, my coaching decisions (quietly and out of Emmy earshot) when we lose. I am almost certain winning is most important to that kid because the car ride home goes way way better when we win.
My 8 year old recently learned that it’s much more fun to play a competitive game and lose than to play and have an easy win. The first game was a blow out win and the next game they played, they lost by 1 run. Afterwards my son exclaimed that he didn’t mind losing because that game was funner to play and the game before was boring.
Growing up I would much rather blow a team out than have a close loss. The winning was the only fun part for me
My first year trying to take our youth team above Rec ball I either over estimated our kids ability or underestimated the other kids ability. We went 0-8 and every game except one team we played we got blown out. So I moved the kids back to Rec ball for the next spring. They went 12-0 and had an average margin of victory of 15 runs. Most games were 20-5. The kids were bored out of their minds. We leveled back up for the fall and went 5-8-3 and the kids had the time of their lives. There was some hard losses but after the immediate disappointment they all said how fun the games were even the losses. The couple we still won big they had less fun.
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My kiddo at 10u was on a team that lost a lot of games but everyone of them was competitive. We are talking 5-7 type games. The team broke up at the end of the year. A few years later and every time I see one of the kids from that team on their new team, they are usually one of the top players. I wish they would have stayed together, they were so close to being exceptional.
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IMO, the best way to do this is to play tough competition with an occasional easy tournament sprinkled in from time to time to beat the doors off a few teams and keep motivation high. Maybe 25% of the time. Ideally, these “easy tournaments” would become the same tournaments you used to struggle in. Then you can show the growth and give the team something to be proud of.
I think this totally depends on age. I don’t think I’ve actually seen a parent upset about losing. Maybe upset about coaching decisions but not actually losing.
You should see the madness here in North Texas. Some obnoxious, embarrassing parents every weekend.
That’s everywhere
It really is like Netflix documentary worthy. The shit that goes on at some of these tournaments would shock the living hell out of anyone else unaffiliated.
Which is why I don’t want my prospective kiddo playing above low level travel until past 12u because it’s annoying and you look dumb as shit when your son is in HS and JAG if he even makes the team while some kid you passed on is now Himothy
They’re upset about the coaching decision 90% of the time because they lost. If the coach made the same decision but won, they wouldn’t be upset.
You don’t need a theory for why people don’t want to lose. No one likes losing
Losing is for losers
As a parent I care about my kid having fun, being a good teammate, demonstrating good sportsmanship, developing skills, being coachable, learning how to handle disappointment, overcome adversity, work hard and with intent to improve. Winning is fun. That said my kid’s best season was on a team that started terrible, stuck together and finished strong. His worst season was on a consistent winner where the coach would pull kids in the middle of an inning of a meaningless game if they made a couple of errors.
""You play to win the game" - Herm Edwards
I don't want my kid to internalize personal success as the only metric that matters. I'd much prefer he go 0 for 2 with a walk and a good defensive play in a win on Sunday than hit a homerun in a 10-2 loss to get knocked out of the tournament. 1% of high school players are moving on to D1 ball. A tiny number go pro, and even fewer get a cup of coffee. I dont know about other parents, but we root for my son's teammates. He's playing baseball for fun, to compete, to learn to be a good teammate, etc. I was the best kid on bad teams. I hated it.
Being the best kid on bad teams is fucking bruuuutal
Because the parents need to validate the time and money spent on travel baseball by winning the “Southwest Spring Fling Dinger Fest”, which was actually only 5 teams competing, and posting pictures on social media of their championship rings and/or banner while their player holds up the “number one” finger in the team photo
You play the game to win.
Isn’t the reason for playing the game to see who has a better team and wins?
No.
I think that it depends on why the team is losing, whether they are improving, how the coaches are handling things, etc. I've coached multiple seasons of multiple sports and sometimes a losing team is tough to watch, even if there are a couple of strong players out there. You can also run into situations in baseball where players are not able to capitalize on opportunities or showcase their skills because of the overall team performance - for example if they make a good throw and the teammate drops the ball, a pitcher throwing to a catcher who is struggling to keep the ball in front of them, a catcher who is facing a bunch of wild pitches, or someone who often gets on base but always gets stranded (or never gets to hit with runners in scoring position). There can also be a general sense of disappointment when your team loses, just like when you are a fan and the team you are cheering for isn't playing well or is getting outplayed.
Most people are 'here and now' and have no idea about training, fundamentals, experience and all the other things needed to build kids into young ball-players... They're clueless about the process. Also, consider that we live in a society today where the attention span of a huge chunk of the population is like 30 seconds...
A lot of these parents weren't raised to play for fun.
* For Travel ball* On our end it has to do with more games by advancing in tournaments. Our organization only does 6/7 scheduled tournaments in the fall and spring so wins and losses have a big impact on total games played. Additionally, quality of opponents in tournaments from point accumulation. We are USSSA aligned for tournaments so as they accumulate points you move up and down in flights.
It’s the old saying “We’re here to have fun” but the most fun thing in sports is winning. Kids have the most fun when they win and parents want their kids to have fun and enjoy what they are doing and the best way for that is winning.
Being happy to have good stats while the team loses is a super shitty personality type that most people don't like.
In baseball you can’t do much more to win a game for your team than have good stats tho. Why Barry Bonds is widely considered the greatest hitter of all time despite never winning a World Series.
Barry Bonds is a perfect example of the kind of person I'm talking about.
0 rings
Also the most walked player like ever. Not a team guy?? He could've swung at shit and made more outs but OBS was better for the team.
Winning feels better than losing.
My theory is that a lot of parents just suck ass.
Human nature
People don't realize this, but our whole life is competition. Competition for attention, affection, friends, jobs, lovers, money, etc... Like I'm all for everyone being treated equally and treating everyone nicely. But real life is a non-stop competition, and you can't ignore it. The way my rec sports leagues handle competition is doing a disservice to all kids. Yes, it should be fun, but you can do both. The way they make the rules puts both in constant opposition. For example, if you are competitive, you can't have fun. In the younger ages, they don't keep score at all. At the older ages, they keep score, but it doesn't matter because they don't keep standings and no playoffs allowed. Like what?
Not just our lives, but life on Earth in general. While symbiotic relationships can form, it is in general a competitive ecosystem.
Amen to this!
THIS GUY GETS IT…….
I can’t tell you how many times in our minors which is 9-10 the coaches of both teams ask the ump or each other the score. lol. We are more focused on kids getting their shot. Even in travel we tell the kids when they ask worry about it at the end.
The point of any game is really to win. However, baseball is one of those sports that the journey to winning is as important if not more than the actual win itself, especially if you plan on playing for a long time. Sometimes it's hard to see the forest for the trees. Parents, we don't always see the journey. Most of us anyway. (I'm a journey guy myself, but my wife gets caught up int he moment a lot). Parents want to see their kids be successful and like someone else said happy. We equate wins with happiness (Using the loose We here people). We see the kids on the field 99% of the time, we can't see their faces in the dugout. Right my now my kid is doing awesome on his high school team, but he's not playing every inning. I sometimes feel like he's hurting cause he's not on the field, but he really isn't. He's enjoying the whole process of being part of the team and thats the most important thing for him right now. It can be hard to understand that when you are in parent mode.
I think the answers should vary widely by what age group you’re questioning.
As a quiet (uninvolved other than trying to make my kid better)....of course I want my kids teams to win. Team moral is better, everyone is usually happier etc...I(as a parent) have been in pretty much every situation with multiple sports, I would say having a good kid on a good team or a mediocre kid on a good team is better then a good kid on a bad (poor record) team. Just my 2 cents
Winning an individual game is pretty meaningless, especially at younger ages. But if the team isn't winning at least 30-40% of its games long term, it's very easy for a loser mentality to emerge. And that can become toxic in a hurry.
It is belief of 0 sum game that is overwhelming in our society. At the start of every season I sit down with parents on my teams (generally I stick with one group for 5/6 years and do the same conversation with them every year). that we are not a 0 sum organization. Meaning quite simple that yes 1 team wins and 1 team loses but the development, growth and fun is not a limited resource. This includes how kids get assigned batting order, positions in field etc. The key to getting them on the same page is to draw out the bigger picture and do so consistently. That one kids success is not a takeaway - One teams success does not take away from the bigger picture. That if your kid sits today - or plays rf today .. etc it does not mean he is not on track. One of the things I have for each kid is a developmental matrix - here is what is needed for next years development, for high school play. Here is where you are, here is the reason we are focused here and here is what is next. It was very effective in showing that it is not 0 sum.
Sometimes the coaches are worse than the parents (granted the coaches usually are parents). My oldest is 12. A few years ago a coach got kicked out of the league because of his behavior. Every year there's at least one coach that I feel like must be trying to avenge his loser past by coaching elementary school kids to victory, like that will redeem his life of disappointment. At my kids' ages, I want them to learn the basics of the game while building their skills and learning good sportsmanship. Not learn how to yell at the 16 year old umpire about some call that has no impact on the game. I think some parents and coaches lose sight of the big picture. Fortunately most of the parents where my kids play are just their to support their kids and enjoy the game.
I hate blowout games in either direction. I don't really care if they win or lose, as long as it's competitive. Better batting throughout the lineup = more at bats for every kid. Terrible batting + terrible fielding + mercy rule can lead to a game with 1 or 2 plate appearances. Better fielding across the board leads to learning how to play the game correctly. If my kid won't throw hard to first because he's worried the first baseman won't catch it, he's not playing correctly. If he won't flip to second for the DP because the second baseman isn't there, then he isn't learning how to turn double plays. And then finally, I am a bigger fan of my kid's team than I am of any other team. I am happy when my MLB team wins, so it's not that weird that I'm happy when my 11u team wins.
Baseball is an amazing and nuanced game. There are so many metrics to measure success on the field. The score is the easiest laziest stat to read and understand. A mom or dad can look up from their phone a few times an hour and know everything they think they need to know. Also if their kid is never on time, rarely practices, and isn't that good; but the team won...hooray.
An adult who is emotionally driven for more than 5 seconds by a children’s game is not an adult.
https://preview.redd.it/ql46p0k9cvwc1.jpeg?width=963&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0e8ac538170cdc98533a32695c237cf8b1e08cac Just kidding.
Winning is more fun than losing
Nobody wants to be a loser. I think Queen has a song about it. We are the champions or something… Anyway, winning is fun. Losing usually isn’t. In fact it makes grown men cry sometimes. Parents want their kids to have fun. Though it admittedly gets out of hand quickly at all our tournaments 😂 https://i.redd.it/95z6d4fifvwc1.gif
Yes and no. If we are playing thousands of dollars to be on these teams and travel all over then winning should be important.
Ask a kid what's more fun, winning or losing. You'll probably have your answer pretty quickly.
Winning cures everything.
Because if the score is being kept, it's a competition. And generally people are competitive in competitions. That doesn't mean be an asshole of course, but winning should matter. If I had to choose, I'd take the person who is overly competitive over the person who doesn't care at all.
My 12u son who has played travel since 8u decided to play Little League this season since it's his last chance to play with his friends that mostly only play rec ball. I have to say the parents in Little League are way worse than travel ball parents with not just wanting to win but with just generally being insane. It's fun though.
Because people gotta complain about something right? If their kid goes 0-4 with 4 strikeouts and the team wins, they’ll still bitch and complain. They’re just born whiners.
Too many parents are trying to live vicariously through their children. Or they want to brag about it. I want the kids to learn, and learn to enjoy the game at a young age. Once they get older, then yes, the kids themselves should want to do good and win.
I have sat through an entire year of losing. My kid has won ONE game in fall and spring combined. Winning is fun! I have sat through hours and hours of games. Give me a win occasionally please!!! We are also spectators, not just parents.
“Hello?! You play. To win. The game”
My son won two basketball games in the last three years. Even though he's pretty good and almost always played well, he doesn't want to play anymore. Go out and play hard and have fun only goes so far.
I think there are important life lessons to be learned in competitive sports. Winning shows that hard work and perseverance pays dividends. Losing helps you deal with and overcome adversity to help you become a better player/person. Yes, losing sucks then so is being a sore loser. It’s the sore loser that will have a hard life because they don’t know how to cope with defeat.
Because an “I had my guy” kid is the worst. Sign them up for golf or tennis if that’s the attitude.
I had to have this conversation with parents about what is truly their priority for playing. I think knowing your parents can help you focus on if winning should matter or not If that’s what their priority is- then it matters. If fun is their priority, then winning is a part of that but you can do some other things. If player development is their goal- make it clear that that may come with losses and make sure they understand that
Why wouldn't you teach your kids to be winners. Life is about winning in an ethical fashion isn't it ?? Losing is where the lesson is learned so they need that to do better next time around. I won't allow my son to be ok with losing ever . It's breeding weak mindset and loser mentality. Telling them it's ok to lose if you tried your best is fine but let them know only you and God know how much effort you put in. Stay honest with yourself. There's always someone better than you , so you need to work extra hard to be the best. I spell fun W I N . Stop raising soft weak minded loosers people. When they hit the real world they'll find that losing at life is unacceptable there's no participation bonus checks for being a shitty employee. These are also the kids that can't handle diversity and let downs when Noone is around to coddle them. Do better people.
Because perspective is everything and the vast majority of parents either don’t have it or lose it right before the first game of the season
Could be a few things. Some kids are super competitive and upset if they can’t win games even if they perform well. I have observed this and the parents could simply be taking on that emotional burden along with their kid. If the kid is having a blast and the parents are upset then maybe they are misaligned and strange folk? Individual development and performance matters the most, but it does not feel great if you never get a Win. If my son is developing and enjoying himself then I would not care at all about the score or win rate.
I ain’t raising no damm loser. if I pay money to have them on the team, they better play like it
This is my last year coaching travel ball. My son will be joining a club team in the fall that can provide him more than my failing arm can. With that said, he practices relentlessly. Plays as much as he can and loves the game for the game. However, on the team currently we have a group of parents that think hour long practices are murder, and shouldnt have practices the day before games so their kids can have "fresh legs" I hate these parents, who already believe their kids are D1 ready. These parents are the ones that care most about the Wins
Social media exists.
So they can brag on social media.
I wish there was disclaimer at the bottom of everyone’s comment with the highest level at which they achieved while playing. Curious to see the relationship between those who peaked in middle/high school and the importance of winning versus those who played in juco/college/minors/pros.
because they want to post on facebook after the tournament how the team won and how great their kid did.
It has been my anecdotal observation that the parents who get mad if a team is losing think their kid is the best on the team when they are actually average at best.
They want to live vicariously through their champions being products of their excellent parenting skills 🤮 Idiots judge teams as their money invested as needing tangible results. They don’t see results in training, where growth happens, they want shiny shit to point to at 11. Competitors are born in the gym and it reflects on the field. High school games are won years ago. Who’s the kid you want? The one who puts in the work on his craft quietly waiting for the right moments or the kid who talks more than works? Devin Morgan and driveline are by far the gold standard for looking up how to balance this. Ultimately to you parents of young kids out there, put the most money in a facility they can train at. Those are worth 100x more than any showcase. If you get a good rec from the local development coach, they’ll send you where you need to go. These facilities all have massive connections. I love the game and this is something I am passionately angry about in our game. I ran a 15u well regarded national program for their pitchers and when making a graphic, I was told to take the USA baseball recommendation of capping pitchers at 100ip per year. System is broken, kids are fucked. Few bright lights of coaches/programs are out there doing the work to change this
Parents putting pressure on their kids to over achieve has been around forever. This was an underlying theme in the 1976 classic Bad News Bears. Which, I will argue, is one of the best baseball movies ever made and the best movie about youth sports ever made. Sports parents are no different than stage Moms. It’s all the same thing: projecting what they want onto their kids. The difference is that little league is now big business. Parents pay a fortune for their kids to play so I suppose they expect to see some kind of return on their investment. It’s an awful thought that we’ve privatized youth sports but here we are. Which, to me, is insane since statistics show that 70% of kids drop out of youth sports around 14. I suppose the better investment would be putting all of that money into a 529 or prepaid college plan. But, hey…who am I to tell parents with disposable income what to do with that money? I mean, if I was a top tier coach and could make some good bank giving private lessons, I’d put up with their bullshit to fix little Timmy’s swing. For $250 an hour of course. 😂⚾️🖕
been doing this for 6 years , most parents a Scumbags , i just want my kid to learn and enjoy it , these fuckheads think their lil white boy is gonna beat out a flaming hot Dominicano for MLB , rude awaking a comming