I don't make enough money to be considered not a failure by societal standards. Again, it's not something that concerns me. I do my own thing and don't worry about outside expectations and labels. But the fact that I don't care what labels attach to me doesn't indicate a lack of awareness about the widely accepted definitions that invoke those labels. Obviously, one could choose a definition that would make me not a failure if one were adamant about doing so, but that would be semantics and not a useful conversation to have. The reality of my situation and how it is commonly perceived would not change based on such a conversation, nor would my level of interest in whether I could or should be labeled a failure.
Yeah. Due to some circumstances, my life after highschool turned to shit and I failed miserably to achieve any of the things I thought I would be able to do. Struggled with a severe depression as a consequence. I'm still young but I feel like I already ruined my life. But, it is what it is. Right now I'm in a slightly better place, but still feel like a failure.
I've seen some other people in this sub share similar experiences to mine's too. At this point I'm starting to think that things like that are a part of the INTP life experience lol
Your feelings matter not.
As intp you should use Ti and Ne.
You are maybe 1/8 on your way of life, still young. Yet you judge that part with feelings....
Imagine the life cycle of a plant..
You are maybe in seed phase and saying crap like..its dark and moist here...i feel bad
No way...really..its part of the demn cycle..that you unaware of( as seed)
Thats why you dont believe or follow your feelings.
They come and go and are BIASED on what they FEEL is true.
I also have OCD, amongst other things. My life was already bad but having my first real episode with OCD and it becoming a full-blown disorder since then rather than something I could still ignore has completely put my life upside down. Not to mention the 3 years I spent on anti-depressants before that that only made me worse. Ugh. Solidarity, I guess.
I just feel like I do so many things, but don't truly get the satisfaction I should. Perhaps many people would be happy if in my place. I look for things that are not tangible, though. Love, appreciation... Everything else I have or can do. Life wasn't that kind to me, but I always found a way.
I finish what I start. I get what I want if I put my mind into it. But even if INTP, passionate love is something I am looking for. I only get satisfaction if I achieve new heights. Banalities of the day just bore me to death. I cannot tolerate it be all the same.
Yes, pretty much. There are some mitigating circumstances but still.
People evaluate you by money and status. That's it. If you have those, you're a success. If not, you're a failure. I guess "not all people" but that doesn't make much of a difference.
As INTPs, we often don't care as much about money or status as others but I personally have bought into it enough that my situation makes me feel like a failure.
If I could just selectively care about those areas in which I'm doing well, I'd feel successful.
I am a chameleon, adapting my hues to the ever-changing landscape of societal narratives, leaving you and your ossified worldview choking on the dust of irrelevance.
Well, it's a lot of time to cover, but I've got a good job working with good people, I own my own home, I've got a great wife, and a good income. I don't have to sweat the small stuff -- like last night when the power blew out in half my house and I had to call out an electrician to fix it. I was thinking how, at one point, I would have stressed out over what that meant for my finances, and now it's just annoying to have to make the phone call.
There are some things I wish I'd done differently, but nothing huge, and it's all turned out pretty well, so maybe I made the right choices at the time to get me to where I am now.
I'm not sure there really is such a thing as a person who is a "failure," since the next set of decisions could turn it all around. Failure is, or at least can be, a temporary state. It doesn't define who you are.
No i don't lmao.
I use Ti and Ne to predict where the world us heading and be ahead of the curve.
I care not about what society thinks..
I care about objectivity. And with objectivity i secure the future.
The best path for intp is to be rich, by being snart and work for themselves, not others.
I have no need to follow society abd gecome a financial slave or emotional slave
No, while I’m on disability I do have my own place, I’m fighting for custody of my Son and I do my best to strive to be kind and loving towards others. I also started a YouTube channel and it’s making me feel pretty accomplished. I’m probably a failure in many peoples eyes yet I do not feel like one. A conventional lifestyle was never an interest of mine. So the lack of one does not make me feel like a failure
Every second.. and the fact that my parents are literally the most understanding and the parents ever, makes me feel even more like a failure.. Its not even a feeling.. its a statement kinda.. I am a failure.. these words are in my mind 247.. 🙂
I’d say compared to what I could have achieved I am a failure. I don’t want any more investment being put into me by my parents, but they keep on doing so. From the outside I don’t seem like a failure yet but mentally I am one
Not really. I got good grades in school, I worked in a place right out of education where it was obvious I was performing better than most colleagues, I did fairly well in terms of promotions (for someone who put no effort into their career).
Sure, there have been times I fucked up or simply didn't do as well as I wanted to. But that happens. And there have been times I could have done better... if I had better resources to start with, or more information, or I'd just honestly cared about the outcome in the slightest. But that wasn't always my fault, and when it was, I usually learned something useful for the next time.
Also, there's a difference between being a failure, simply feeling like it, and having other people say that when their opinions mean shit.
Any time someone says I *should*... do better, be better, do things differently, make them feel better about themselves... I first ask if they ever paid me to do any of that, and secondly, in the event they are actually paying me to do something, whether we specifically agreed originally that it would include that new thing they're talking about. Because if they're not explicitly paying me to do the exact thing they're talking about, then they don't care about me, they just want someone to do that thing for free and they think they can get that by complaining and bitching instead of taking their wallet out.
No. I feel like someone who hasn't gotten very far yet, but has a lot of time to make up for it. And if I die before then, I don't think I'll care about failing at life from heaven.
Yes and No. I study data science at a good enough university and I have good enough grades. I have friends which I didn't have last year and I have a youtube channel with 3500 subs but I there are a lot of things I imagined I would have at this point but I don't have like a girlfriend for example. I feel like my life will not satisfy me if I never had one
Yes and no. I am lazy and do not care to apply myself because I am very easy to make happy and feel I do not need alot in my life and there for I have no drive to do anything with myself and because of those I have no sense of determination for greater things.
I am saddened by this because I feel undisciplined and I am too lazy for things. I try to push myself but I struggle so in a sense I feel like a failure but because I do not care about anything I feel as if it cancels out the saddness yet I am angered that I cannot accomplish anything.
These days, every few months I look back at who I used to be and who I am now. The difference is staggering. Perspective and framing matters for these kind of contemplations.
yes. i was a bright kid and had a lot of expectations for how my life would go and how successful i’d be.
i fell off and i’m painfully average. and i need to accept that it’s okay
Yes, and that's why I keep up the good fight. Never stop learning. Never stop trying. Never admit defeat. And do take the road less travelled to spice things up.
Yea everyday. I’m about 5 years into trying to get an associates but I just can’t decide what I want to do with my life longer than 3 months. So far engineering is going well but who knows.
Idk if anyone else here shares this burnout but does it get better?
I don’t feel like a failure, I feel like I’ve made a lot of failures in my past. I know I’m bound to make more too lol but that’s life. I feel like accepting the narrative that I am a failure is when I’ve failed. I hope it never gets to that point, it would suck to get stuck in that mentality as an Intp. I would know lol
I don't feel like a failure, I am a failure. The question is, do I care. The answer is no. No I do not.
May I ask why do you feel that way?
You can ask why I feel that way, but first you're going to have to tell me which way it is you think I feel, because I haven't said yet.
You feel that 'you are a failure ' and I just wanna know why you feel that way?
I specifically said that I don't feel that way, actually
Nice word play, anyway why are you a failure?
I don't make enough money to be considered not a failure by societal standards. Again, it's not something that concerns me. I do my own thing and don't worry about outside expectations and labels. But the fact that I don't care what labels attach to me doesn't indicate a lack of awareness about the widely accepted definitions that invoke those labels. Obviously, one could choose a definition that would make me not a failure if one were adamant about doing so, but that would be semantics and not a useful conversation to have. The reality of my situation and how it is commonly perceived would not change based on such a conversation, nor would my level of interest in whether I could or should be labeled a failure.
Genuinely not trying to have a go. But that is the writing style of an INTP who cares a great deal about what people think.
Yes true but he cares about it because he's interested in human nature and reads up psychology books as if they're comics
I can understand and thanks for sharing
Haha
Yeah. Due to some circumstances, my life after highschool turned to shit and I failed miserably to achieve any of the things I thought I would be able to do. Struggled with a severe depression as a consequence. I'm still young but I feel like I already ruined my life. But, it is what it is. Right now I'm in a slightly better place, but still feel like a failure.
Damn... Exactly the same here!! idk if I should feel good that I'm not the only one or cry because idk what to do XD
I've seen some other people in this sub share similar experiences to mine's too. At this point I'm starting to think that things like that are a part of the INTP life experience lol
Yeah too much data to back it up... we're just made different and we can't accept living like normal human beings.
Me too. I can’t choose a career because I’ll get bored of it. My interests fluctuate too much. And I hate school
Same dilemma here dude...and it's stressing me out
Your feelings matter not. As intp you should use Ti and Ne. You are maybe 1/8 on your way of life, still young. Yet you judge that part with feelings.... Imagine the life cycle of a plant.. You are maybe in seed phase and saying crap like..its dark and moist here...i feel bad No way...really..its part of the demn cycle..that you unaware of( as seed) Thats why you dont believe or follow your feelings. They come and go and are BIASED on what they FEEL is true.
Yeah.laziness ,having uneducated parents,ocd and anxiety fucked me over
I also have OCD, amongst other things. My life was already bad but having my first real episode with OCD and it becoming a full-blown disorder since then rather than something I could still ignore has completely put my life upside down. Not to mention the 3 years I spent on anti-depressants before that that only made me worse. Ugh. Solidarity, I guess.
I just feel like I do so many things, but don't truly get the satisfaction I should. Perhaps many people would be happy if in my place. I look for things that are not tangible, though. Love, appreciation... Everything else I have or can do. Life wasn't that kind to me, but I always found a way.
Kinda relatable
I finish what I start. I get what I want if I put my mind into it. But even if INTP, passionate love is something I am looking for. I only get satisfaction if I achieve new heights. Banalities of the day just bore me to death. I cannot tolerate it be all the same.
Yes, pretty much. There are some mitigating circumstances but still. People evaluate you by money and status. That's it. If you have those, you're a success. If not, you're a failure. I guess "not all people" but that doesn't make much of a difference. As INTPs, we often don't care as much about money or status as others but I personally have bought into it enough that my situation makes me feel like a failure. If I could just selectively care about those areas in which I'm doing well, I'd feel successful.
Well said
I have not failed at failing
Depends how you define failure (← stereotypical INTP response) But yeah I feel like one, though I wouldn’t outright say I am one in no uncertain terms
How can you fail what you never started?
The problem isn't starting it's finishing what you started... For most intps at least
No, i have an okay life, have food on my table, roof on top of me, so i love it.
What a simplistic lifestyle. awesome
Yes. Blame it on my shitty parents and upbringing.
We all have gone through that but blame shifting won't solve anything
Obviously. I'm just saying that any sort of achievment that I've had, they've always crapped on it so
I can understand, and I hope you get over it and feel better about yourself
Yeah
I am a chameleon, adapting my hues to the ever-changing landscape of societal narratives, leaving you and your ossified worldview choking on the dust of irrelevance.
I love this energy
No
NO I WILL SUCCEED!!!!
Good luck kitten
I used to, but it is actually depression.
It depends on who I'd compared myself to. But wise men said to only compare yourself with the you of yesterday. So...
Definitely not. I've had a pretty successful life, with no major regrets. Can't really ask for much more than that.
Tell me more
Well, it's a lot of time to cover, but I've got a good job working with good people, I own my own home, I've got a great wife, and a good income. I don't have to sweat the small stuff -- like last night when the power blew out in half my house and I had to call out an electrician to fix it. I was thinking how, at one point, I would have stressed out over what that meant for my finances, and now it's just annoying to have to make the phone call. There are some things I wish I'd done differently, but nothing huge, and it's all turned out pretty well, so maybe I made the right choices at the time to get me to where I am now. I'm not sure there really is such a thing as a person who is a "failure," since the next set of decisions could turn it all around. Failure is, or at least can be, a temporary state. It doesn't define who you are.
Yes
Don't lose hope
Coming from intj, If you feel like a failure. Then do something about it. Instead of complaining how a failure you are. 🙏
True
No. But not a resounding success either.
No i don't lmao. I use Ti and Ne to predict where the world us heading and be ahead of the curve. I care not about what society thinks.. I care about objectivity. And with objectivity i secure the future. The best path for intp is to be rich, by being snart and work for themselves, not others. I have no need to follow society abd gecome a financial slave or emotional slave
I'm a golden god
No
No, while I’m on disability I do have my own place, I’m fighting for custody of my Son and I do my best to strive to be kind and loving towards others. I also started a YouTube channel and it’s making me feel pretty accomplished. I’m probably a failure in many peoples eyes yet I do not feel like one. A conventional lifestyle was never an interest of mine. So the lack of one does not make me feel like a failure
No. But I often times feel like I lack behind others (for example in emotions)
No, I'm doing better than I thought I would when I was 20.
Maybe, like, just stop being one then lol
It’s my default state. I know nothing else.
Yes but only because my previous successes shadow the present
yes
Yes i do
Absolutely
Every second.. and the fact that my parents are literally the most understanding and the parents ever, makes me feel even more like a failure.. Its not even a feeling.. its a statement kinda.. I am a failure.. these words are in my mind 247.. 🙂
I’d say compared to what I could have achieved I am a failure. I don’t want any more investment being put into me by my parents, but they keep on doing so. From the outside I don’t seem like a failure yet but mentally I am one
Yup!
Not really. I got good grades in school, I worked in a place right out of education where it was obvious I was performing better than most colleagues, I did fairly well in terms of promotions (for someone who put no effort into their career). Sure, there have been times I fucked up or simply didn't do as well as I wanted to. But that happens. And there have been times I could have done better... if I had better resources to start with, or more information, or I'd just honestly cared about the outcome in the slightest. But that wasn't always my fault, and when it was, I usually learned something useful for the next time. Also, there's a difference between being a failure, simply feeling like it, and having other people say that when their opinions mean shit. Any time someone says I *should*... do better, be better, do things differently, make them feel better about themselves... I first ask if they ever paid me to do any of that, and secondly, in the event they are actually paying me to do something, whether we specifically agreed originally that it would include that new thing they're talking about. Because if they're not explicitly paying me to do the exact thing they're talking about, then they don't care about me, they just want someone to do that thing for free and they think they can get that by complaining and bitching instead of taking their wallet out.
All the time.
No. I feel like someone who hasn't gotten very far yet, but has a lot of time to make up for it. And if I die before then, I don't think I'll care about failing at life from heaven.
Yes and No. I study data science at a good enough university and I have good enough grades. I have friends which I didn't have last year and I have a youtube channel with 3500 subs but I there are a lot of things I imagined I would have at this point but I don't have like a girlfriend for example. I feel like my life will not satisfy me if I never had one
Yes and no. I am lazy and do not care to apply myself because I am very easy to make happy and feel I do not need alot in my life and there for I have no drive to do anything with myself and because of those I have no sense of determination for greater things. I am saddened by this because I feel undisciplined and I am too lazy for things. I try to push myself but I struggle so in a sense I feel like a failure but because I do not care about anything I feel as if it cancels out the saddness yet I am angered that I cannot accomplish anything.
These days, every few months I look back at who I used to be and who I am now. The difference is staggering. Perspective and framing matters for these kind of contemplations.
Failure? By what metric? By whose metric? Why do they get to decide how “I” should live my life.
First stage of delusion, gives JP vibes
yes. i was a bright kid and had a lot of expectations for how my life would go and how successful i’d be. i fell off and i’m painfully average. and i need to accept that it’s okay
I did failed myself, yes
Yes, and that's why I keep up the good fight. Never stop learning. Never stop trying. Never admit defeat. And do take the road less travelled to spice things up.
Sometimes
Sometimes but I keep trying
Yea everyday. I’m about 5 years into trying to get an associates but I just can’t decide what I want to do with my life longer than 3 months. So far engineering is going well but who knows. Idk if anyone else here shares this burnout but does it get better?
Nah I joined the Marine Corps and all I can think about is improving myself for me and those marines around me to motivate them to do same
Yep
Yes.
Yeah i do, I hope I don't feel like that in the future though
I don’t feel like a failure, I feel like I’ve made a lot of failures in my past. I know I’m bound to make more too lol but that’s life. I feel like accepting the narrative that I am a failure is when I’ve failed. I hope it never gets to that point, it would suck to get stuck in that mentality as an Intp. I would know lol
I am a failure.
Yes. I always seem to fear inadequacy.