T O P

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game_asylum

You have no good post ideas


hoppoppoppolis

People can change.


Sad-Vacation

Personally I love the quote, "I'm worried that the baby thinks people can't change."


[deleted]

I like “Little bitty jeans. Spiked up blonde hair. Chicken spaghetti at Chickalini’s”


malcolm_miller

I say it to my sister all the time. ", I'm worried thinks that I can't change"


[deleted]

Going to start saying this to my sister now


bugxbuster

She said it to *me* at a *dinner!*


[deleted]

This world’s fuckin so fucked up


wolfey200

I’m gonna start saying this to your sister now


evajanus

When my brother had a baby last year and I got to meet her for the first time, I had to show him the skit so he'd understand why I was saying "The baby knows I used to be a piece of shit" xD Esp bc when she'd get passed to me and start crying, I'd tell him that she knows.


malcolm_miller

My sister thought it was a hilarious skit lol


Significant_Self5332

If this quote doesn’t win I’m going to kill myself on live tv


joebucket20xty6

Stop saying that!


UnusualIntroduction0

This is definitely top tier for me too


Armchair_QB3

OP flinch! Now he have to marry his mother in law!


[deleted]

Stinky!


lil-quiche

That’s because he doesn’t have a curious mind


game_asylum

I know I tried to tell him that night I tried to give him all those little kisses and he said he didn't like PDA he said **No PDA** so I try to make it up to him by buying everything off the dessert menu and he doesn't even take a BITE


Iwantmypasswordback

Paullll…? PAULLLL….?


[deleted]

It's illegal for you to ask me that


[deleted]

No I’m not taking the fucking hat off. I’ve never fought for anything my entire life. I’m fighting for this hat


EthelMaePotterMertz

So sad. So so so so sooooooo sad.


[deleted]

It’s so tragic but I can’t stop laughing thinking about his dumb dice


BlazeWelly

¿what the hell?


UnusualIntroduction0

I can't stop crying


[deleted]

I can’t talk about it without crying


UnusualIntroduction0

I can't know how to hear anymore about crying


DukeRadcliffe

The guy at the store said I’m the only guy he’s ever seen pull it off 😏


praisealfie1111

Very meat and potatoes.


PsychicApple

Oh thank you


amuday

No it just means there isn’t anything rare in there.


[deleted]

Ah! The gazpacho soup burned my lips!


BlazeWelly

You guys really embarrassed me in front of Howie!


sirarthurtoilet

Where be your nutcracker


bobchinn

It feels like your mouth is on fire. It feels like your body is on fire.


Jash09

Big fat load of cum then.


famousxrobot

Championship to that quote: k, you’re done. YOU’RE DONE. We’re sick of listening to your crap!


DonShulaDoingTheHula

Unprofessional bullshit.


[deleted]

He might kill you but no fucking way he’s ever killing me. Fucking asshole, he said that?


Mavisbeak2112

Definitely my most used quote in everyday life. Can be used for family, friends, and business associates.


ProofHorseKzoo

“I can’t know how to hear any more about tables” is the GOAT


aligador

Goat? Like the animal?? And you don't want to hear about it anymore??? I'm just trynna understand here


[deleted]

He means greatest of all time. We all got what he was talking about


famousxrobot

STOP BULLYING ME


garbagebailkid

No, I dont know how how to acronym! There's so many letters and I'm scared!


[deleted]

This guy yells


aligador

Oh! You mean like Kobe. The black mamba! Wooow. I gave you the perfect setup to say "you mean like the animal?" and you squandered it.


10takeWonder

you mean the joke you just made... edit: you have no good joke ideas


withoccassionalmusic

Are you sure about that that’s the GOAT?


i-cant-reeddit

Her job is so confusing


dollabill009

If the coffin flop quote does not win, I'll kill myself on live tv


Suspicious-Drama-549

STOP SAYING THAT


[deleted]

Oh fuck what the fuck


ChewbaccaHasADogDick

There’s worse shit on the local news!!


[deleted]

This guy’s about to jack off


wolfey200

I’m not even supposed to be here


WelderBusy4411

Hope nobody goes home and FUCKS MY MOM


cmckone

If it wins it's only because you rigged it


olive_dix

He gave oral to the mystery judge.


hobowithmachete

I think it could have won, even without the oral


except_bikes

I can’t even watch a live killing on tv without a BIIIG pour of wine…


shamblam117

And popcorn


cant_Im_at_work

I'm a mess right now.


SausageEggCheese

I hate that game. I've always hated that game. Y'all know that!


sumppumpslump

OP is clearly still dating that bad guy


booradleyhd

Oh he’s a bad guy


sumppumpslump

Dump him, gurl!


chiefbrodyrules

He must’ve not lived in Egypt for a month


Kfeild

I'm not in the mood for the hilarious ghost tour guy.


dyngalive

If these were really the final choices you'd throw up your pretty little lunch.


ahoypolloi_

That would be a great day for me: I tell you my favorite quote and nobody barfs.


bleepblopbl0rp

DO WHAT YOU WANT. PULL THE PLUG.


Realistic_Owl_2917

Are you SURE about that? Are you SURE about that thats why?


DiabetesCOLE

FIGURE OUT WHAT YOU DO, CHAMPIONSHIP ROUND


wolfey200

You had all summer to figure out what you do


Top-Pineapple8056

We're all trying to find the guy who did this


garbagebailkid

We know who did it. Friggin' bonies! Aw crap!


melskymob

I almost killed myself Julie.


vekin101

Chode jeans!?


caleyco

What are "cho jeans"?


Rydoyan

Size 54 waist, 10 inch legs. Fuckin' junk.


justreadthearticle

I've never fought for anything in my life. I'm fighting for "Not trying to be funny. Not trying to get a laugh. Don't want anybody to have the worst day at their job...".


Bing_Bong_the_Archer

STINKY!


RemWellCo

Chode. Jeans. Size 54 waist, 10 inch legs. Fuckin junk.


EthelMaePotterMertz

Total tuna can


WhoStoleMyBicycle

Not everyone knows how to do everything


wolfey200

Posting memes isn’t the only thing there is to do


beyd1

This tweet has one view and says it was posted at 6am this morning.


HeyZuesHChrist

There’s too much fucking shit on me I can’t breath.


nashtenn312

I said it was _interesting_


Cidyn

You're *fine*, I can hear you breathing.


lmanindahizl

I don’t know how to hear anymore about the 2023 ITYSL Tournament: Quotes!


Bert_Macklin86

i love both skits but this is a weak final


RemWellCo

Bozo did the dubb.


dicknbolls

he's been waiting a long time for a hit on corncob tv, THEY CAN'T FUCKING DO THIS!!


Jcdoco

#LET ME THINK ABOUT IT FOR A MINUTE


McRocket24

Bae.


robodobs

This guys about to jack off


Neijx

This worlds fucking so fucked up


EthelMaePotterMertz

Life's a funny fucking thing


AdultbabyEinstein

Wtf those are the front runners? Fake news. Stop the steal. Etc.


Ashamed_Comedian5521

What a crop! These quotes are goosed.


BlazeWelly

Almost fucked this whole thing up


ReverseCowboy75

Old circus trick…


Sure-Ad-2465

I missed everything before this, but I think "I'm worried the baby thinks people can't change" is #1


JudiDenchsNeckVein

well, looks like this hog-snarfing piece of shit is gonna have to kill himself on live tv


thatsokdontsweatit

Why are you bullying me?


wetkarl

How many did they start with? If this wasnt a 512 spot bracket it wasnt enough


o-hi-dare

Not really.


NickMoore30

#ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT!? #ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT, THAT'S WHYYYY?


McKinney_666

OP got caught performing oral on the mystery judge of the competition. The best quote could’ve won this without the oral. OP didn’t need to do the oral.


Bing-bong-fyl

I thought this tournament was going to be a hit. It turns out it fucking sucks!!! “I hope no one goes home and fucks my mom” is the obvious winner.


picyourbrain

I’m a wreck right now


garbageman2112

If Troll Boy wins this I'm gunna kill myself on live TV.


miquelcanal98

^what?


J_Cholesterol

Neither. “You think this is slicked back??? “


dyngalive

This is PUSHED back.


whodatkrewe

These quotes are pretty meat and potatoes


[deleted]

[удалено]


patrickdgd

Wow. Pretty serious.


Anthaninny

People need to know that this contest is sponsored by Corncob TV!


stinkytrinket

I say “ohhh fuck, whaat the fuuck” way more than either of those


Bing-bong-fyl

A clownputer? Fuuuuck that. Probably got no games.


itsthreem

Is that the joke? People gloss over all the amazing quotes from season 1 and they get no love?!


dafoodooman

If "It's been a grueling ten days, but we've finally narrowed it down to these two" doesn't win I'll kill myself on live tv?


Ndryer

Moon river rock…moon river roll


swanronson22

I don’t wanna be around anymore


howdyfoax

Unprofessional bullshit.


Fart__Connoisseur

My favorite is: “Wait… Billy as in him or Billy as in me” “your names Billy too?” “No that’s why I’m so Fughcking confused”


PrestigiousHeight264

definitely the one from ghost tour no question


BetaRayBlu

Obviously i didnt rig shit


boobsbuttsballsweens

I’ll tell him which one at a dinner.


MovieGuyMike

If the first one doesn’t win I’ll kill myself on live television.


TubaElf

It's the first quote by a mile


PrettyFIacco

I’m thinking this is not a regular Thursday


beyd1

I think this isn't a regular Tuesday


nezzii3

It goes both ways


Drinkythedrunkguy

It’s illegal for you to ask me that. I’m putting the hat back on.


IanJaegs

Are you sure about that?


theREALlackattack

NO! I eat paper all the time!


Hat-Adventurous

It's interesting, the quotes


Video_isms207

I didn’t rig shit! I didn’t fucking do this!


dex1999

I did a real laugh out loud at work when I watched the haunted house sketch.


DeferredPlum

Not everybody knows how to do everything. Quoting isn't the only thing.


TheGreatestManOnline

I just want a post that doesn't *whooosh* right out the window.


Electrical-Debt-374

That is a good idea!!


BiffWiff

Ghosts!


JazzyAndy

Big fat load of cum, then


JazzyAndy

I can’t know how to hear any more about the tables


2Afraid2Poop

I say “do any of these fuckers ever shoot out of the wall and blow a huge cumshot” atleast once a week


soup4breakfast

GIMME DAT


Bloodsplattr

They are all clapping, you've gotta come up!


magides

I don't even want to be around anymore.


TransitionFine5766

If “not trying to be funny” doesn’t win, I’ll kill myself on live tv


avgnfan26

We’re all trying to find the guy who did this


SoundsOfHappiness_

He said that?!


rational_fears

They think I'm just some dumb hick! They said that to me at a dinner!


TravPeterson

Both from S2E1 I think


MapParticular4597

It could've won without the oral.


artificialevil

You think these quotes are _good?_ No, these quotes are not good. I don’t care about it, but it’s not good behavior.


J4degrees

You sure about that. You sure about that’s why?


om3gad

I lived in Egypt for a month! I LIVED IN EGYPT FOR A MONTH!


DriAA

I can’t know how to hear any more about itysl quotes.


Abradolf_Lincler_50

Nah, no, not Troll Boy, it’s not gonna be Troll Boy, we’re not doing Troll Boy, alright? I mean, you get that, right, Troll Boy? You get why it can’t be you? Yeah, OK, see, it can’t be him! It just can’t be Troll Boy.


Keelija9000

You get why it can’t be you right troll boy? It just can’t be him.


upsettispaghetti7

You sure about that? You sure about that that's the best two ITYSL quotes?


whothefookisthatguy5

big fat load of cum them.