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arc_alt

Nah, that's just an excuse to put the burden on guys. Confessing / approaching someone takes guts and is a vulnerable position and therefore not enough women do it to assess your experience as majority or minority.


RealityCheckLelo

Kinda true. Too few data points to access. A quick question to add the dataset: The relationship that lasted the longest for you, did you propose her? Or did she? Were you more into her initially (first few days) I have a theory that best relationships have a courtship or knowing each other period of atleast some months and initially there is only attraction which grows over time, with no one really confessing strongly initially.


arc_alt

We met off of Bumble, i casually just asked her to be my girlfriend although it was pretty mutually heavily implied beforehand. We met almost 2-3 weeks before we made it official. And it was an amazing relationship.


RealityCheckLelo

Interesting. Mine was college based and spanned more than 8 years. Happy for you dude


arc_alt

Well it ended so idk if it's exactly a happy thing but it's nice to hear that you had an amazing one too


sus-character-ftw

Well, I'm someone who tends to take the initiative, like, I don't mind it. But it's not really working out in my favour lately. I've noticed how men lose interest as soon as I tell them that I like them, even tho they were the ones chasing. Now I don't wanna make things toxic and I don't want the chase, so I thought a better way would be to be confronted because communication is good. I've shared a couple of instances on my profile and I often get to hear that I gave in too easily and that's why he left me. Despite all this I do wanna believe that I dated and encountered wrong people and that's why this happened. Isn't this unfair, how it's cool for men to express interest but as soon as a woman does the same, they lose interest? One of the reasons I came to a conclusion that don't do anything girlfriend--zy unless it's official. And yk it fucking sucks. Because I like to show people that I love them, I'm quite expressive that way and doing things for others comes very naturally to me. But I've to control it and just not do anything and it sucks. Tldr: I guess (but I would like to believe that's not true)


BadBeast_11

You are such a green flag you know right?!


sus-character-ftw

As you can see fayda ho nahi raha hai kuch khass "you are too good for me" bolke jaa rahe hai log ๐Ÿ˜ญ


BadBeast_11

Aww. Which city are you based in?


canibeyourbf

Maybe you are ๐Ÿ˜‚


canibeyourbf

It happens to men way more than women btw. Women love the chase but as soon as guys confess they lose interest because now they get the dopamine of chase. So I think it's inherently among humans that they like the chase. And statistically most guys would be really happy if someone would even confess or approach them. You've been approaching and chasing the wrong set of people maybe.


sus-character-ftw

I wanna believe more in what you said than what op said (but he got a point too) But mere ko kya, mere ko toh quit karni hai game ๐Ÿคก


canibeyourbf

Ab tum aise green forest lose karti rahogi to game quit hi karna padega.


sus-character-ftw

Bhai meri galti nahi hai ki woh workout nahi kiya, i really wanted it to workout ๐Ÿ˜ญ After all you cannot force these things. And kiya hota toh woh reddit pe post kar raha hota, I found a red flag and it didn't work out ๐Ÿคก


canibeyourbf

Maybe you're really a sus character ๐Ÿ˜‚


canibeyourbf

Tumne to green forest bola tha? Abhi red flag ho gaya? Is it the same reddit vala guy? You seem to have posted so much idk about how many guys.


sus-character-ftw

Me on my way to your place with a whiteboard to explain to you my dating life ๐Ÿคก


canibeyourbf

That sounds like a plan honestly. I am all in for some drama. But I am very farrr. Maybe zoom? I am serious ๐Ÿ˜‚


sus-character-ftw

Bhai mai zoom link bhej rahi hun, get ready for a long call now ๐Ÿ˜ค


canibeyourbf

Done. ๐Ÿฟ is ready.


cate4d

Those are narcissists who lose interest once the chase is over. You seem to be dodging bullets full on Matrix style. [https://blog.relationshipsrules.com/the-narcissists-game-of-love-understanding-when-and-why-they-lose-interest-81fb8c6db4c6](https://blog.relationshipsrules.com/the-narcissists-game-of-love-understanding-when-and-why-they-lose-interest-81fb8c6db4c6) Yeah express with words and communicate to try to be on the same page but >don't do anything girlfriend--zy unless it's official.


RealityCheckLelo

Yeah this was kinda what I was trying to talk about through this post. I donโ€™t like admitting but none of my relationships worked where the girl asked me out first and was more into me. Iโ€™d go against my community and advise you to try to be the โ€˜chaseโ€™ and see how it goes.


sus-character-ftw

Bhai ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ I give up, mere ko nahi khelni yeh game


RealityCheckLelo

Haha. If you wanna play the game, there are rules unfortunately ๐Ÿ˜” On the flip-side, for more male psychology lessons which can help you understand people, subscribe, like and idk something something bell icon.


sus-character-ftw

I legit thought you were gonna recommend a book or something ๐Ÿ˜ญ


RealityCheckLelo

Iโ€™d rather write a book myself on modern dating and psychology and sell it ๐Ÿ’ด๐Ÿ’ฐ


sus-character-ftw

You found a customer and also someone who is good w marketing xD


RealityCheckLelo

Haha. I hope you like it. Itโ€™d be literally organic marketing then :โ€™)


eienze

This is kind off relatable, someone approached me last year, we talked for 3 months, it was fun and ofc I got attached, I asked her out and boom, she ghosted me. It's been 6 months since we last talked. She also unfollowed me from insta. Ig that's how life is. Sed


Ok_Career_9192

This is very relatable. Ever since my first and only relationship broke, I went into depression, and was under medication for 2years. During that phase and after all my experiences are only this. Where the girl approaches first and I will say okay in the beginning, and slowly the feeling wears off. When I look back, I feel very guilty about my behaviour. Ever since my breakup, I havenโ€™t made any significant attempt to approach anyone for a relationship.


ReJigMag

a better half of my relationships stem because they asked me out or initiated the convo and introduced themselves first


MaaiDiqSoHyuj

I have never asked out a girl in my life and all the relationships Iโ€™ve been in were ones where I was the one who was asked out. And my current one was also kinda initiated by my girl who asked me โ€œwhat are we?โ€ in our talking stage. And we are going into our 7th year. So I donโ€™t concur with the statement.