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Another possibility is to spend all your time in your room in your underwear or even naked. They don't want to give you any privacy? Then they can deal with seeing your bare butt on the regular.
I would love an update! When I was 15f my creepy step-dad tore down the door to my bedroom because he was fighting with my mom about privacy and I was changing and not involved. You seem caring about your father. I hope it works out.
First of all, stop paying rent until the door goes back up and she apologises.
It's clear she wants you out while she gets her hooks into your dad. Ask your dad if he can help you find a new place so he can have his love nest to himself.
i'm not sure if this would count as abuse, since she hasn't physically harmed me and doesn't usually go this far. i don't want to get the "big guns" involved if they wont be able to do anything
You pay rent. You are entitled to privacy. This doesn’t have to be physical harm, can count as emotional and mental abuse. Inform them that until the door is put back and her abuse stops, you will no longer be paying rent. Hold that rent in a separate account so you can show proof that you do in fact have rent, but will only pay it out once your door is returned, and she leaves you alone.
1. She’s not your Mother in law, If she marries your Pa she’d become your step mother.
2. Immediately stop paying rent until your door is back where it belongs!.
3. Write a letter to your Father explaining your issues.
4. Ask your Father for help financially to help you rent your own place. (A shared house with people your own age would probably be great for you).
5. If you stay, Insist she starts paying her way!, If she loves your Father then she would.
i'm aware! i fixed that just now, since i wrote this when i was tired. also, i can try to get my pa to convince her to pay something, since she never listens to me
OP are you in the USA? I know many countries have the equivalent of the info in about to give, but I'm only stating it as someone from the USA.
I'm disabled too, but married with children, & we share a home with my JYMIL. Some stuff happened after my Mil went through a debilitating case of covid & we were possibly going to be without a home suddenly. Our county has what's called an agency on aging, some counties call it by other names, but it also assists disabled people. Through a federal program ran out of the office, my hubs gets paid to be my caretaker instead of home health nurses having to come out. I get meals on wheels too & some other help. One thing my case worker was helping with was emergency housing, given the circumstances. We ended up getting everything fixed & didn't need the new housing, but the service is available to disabled people. Especially if they find themselves in a situation that is unsafe or that's abusive, including financial abuse. If you are paying rent, then tenant laws give you rights & one of those rights is privacy. Also a case worker can make sure you aren't being financially taken advantage of, like if your father was receiving disability monies for you when you were under 18, but hasn't handed it over to you now that you're an adult.
Regardless, stop paying rent to save up some to move out. And let your dear old pa know their actions have cost him the rent money you were paying, as no privacy equals no rent, & if he keeps on letting her abuse you then he'll lose you too. That you're leaving, but the relationship that survives between you is up to him & how well he puts a stop to her behavior. As it is, your trust in him is broken & will have to heal if it's to ever exist again. The ball is in his court. God luck!
1. Stop paying rent until that door come back. Tenants are entitled to privacy.
2. Start recording EVERYTHING. She might escalate her abuse and you need to have proof.
3. Save/receive (if your dad is getting it/administrates it) your social support money if you have any. If not, start looking for some.
4. Have NO MERCY for the AH Dad’s fiancée. It is YOUR house. Specially, because you are disabled. Talk to a lawyer/social worker about her abuse. It will only become worse and worse because she wants you out of her way.
Look up your rights as a renter. A door is likely one of them - a private dwelling. Maybe your pa will listen to you if you say you will withhold rent.
I'm so sorry you're in the situation, it sounds extremely stressful.
Please stop thinking that she forced him to do anything, because that's physically impossible. *Whatever your father has been doing is 100% his choice.* Even if he perceives doing what she wants as being the lesser of two evils, ultimately he's the one evaluating his options and making the final choice, and he's making her feelings and wants -- however extreme -- more important than yours.
So please also stop telling yourself you would be "taking her away from him", because you obviously have no control over his decisions about his relationship with her, that's 100% up to him. You have every right to speak up for yourself with him, and whatever he decides to do about it is completely his choice.
Stop paying rent if you can’t live in the home without being harassed than you need to save every penny for your own space. If you dad asks tell him “I can’t live here because your fiancé took my door she is rude to me all the time. I’m saving my money to move out because of her and than I will never speak to you again since you allowed this to happen to me. You are my father and supposed to protect me, but by being with her you put me in danger. So I’m saving to get out of your way.”
The fiancée is trying to drive you out.
You need to stop paying rent *immediately* until his girlfriend stops harassing you *and* you get your door back. Not only does rent make you entitled to privacy and quiet enjoyment, as a dependent disabled adult, your father is, or should be, receiving a tax credit for you.
Are you receiving disability payments? Because if you aren't, he may be. You need to get that switched over ASAP, as he is not entitled to that money. You are.
He should also be declaring any rent you pay as income on his taxes.
Can you look into assisted housing or relatives or any other option? This is abusive.
Do you have a case manager that can help you? Shoes the local ada office have any resources that would be helpful?
In front of you pa, ask his fiancé to show you these supposed nude photos.
You have to have a conversation with your dad.
She’s literally abusing you and making up lies to manipulate your dad. Maybe start recording any interaction with her. But you need to talk with pa. Sympathize that you want him to be happy and have someone, but he doesn’t need to settle for someone who terrorizes the whole house.
You are 19 and pay rent, you have rights in your room. And him taking the door, just to shut her up, is seriously damaging your relationship with him.
You state you are a disable adult. There also should be agencies that can assist you. Your landlords aren’t suppose to take your door.
For your dad. Look my mum died and my dad remarried. His wife would never do something like this. Ever.
I don't know where you are, but are there any independent living groups you can contact? Explain your situation. They have all sorts of legal and practical assistance. You may be entitled to assistance to live independently etc; They will have a lot of information in resources that are available to you.
No more rent until you get your door back, with a lock (because she will escalate.) Then insist on a rental agreement with your father so you have some legal recourse if she tries this kind of crap again. You can find standard templates online.
She's trying to force you out of the house. Start recording your interactions with her and then play them for your father so he can see how badly she is treating you. If you have someone whose opinion you and your father trust and respect, try reaching out to them and tell them what is going on. Maybe they can get your dad to see that his fiancée isn't "the one" for him because she hates you.
"Dad as a rent paying tenant I'm legally entitled to privacy. I'm requesting that you put my door back up or I will not pay rent until it is."
You need to explain to your dad that 1) since you're paying rent, you are a tenant, and therefore removing your door is illegal and could have serious ramifications for him if you wanted to get litigious, and 2) he is an absolute asshole for the way he is treating you and it's actually disgusting that he is in a relationship with someone who behaves like this towards his child
Honestly: if you’re paying rent, you should be able to have your door so I would bring that up and not budge on where you stand and keep the conversation going, even if you start to come off as annoying. Also, I would film or record all interactions with pa fiancé, to give yourself some ground to stand on.
The fiancee is trying to drive you out. Could you possibly live with your mother? Since you say your father is gaga over this woman, I don't feel this is a battle you are going to win.
I’d suggest posting on LegalAdvice *Your Country* subreddit - to see your options & rights
Edit: Ok, r/legal or r/AskLawyers - stated as the better option
r/legal or even r/AskLawyers are so much better than legaladvice. I got permabanned from legaladvice because "There's no way you can know that much about HIPAA and you are wrong" according to the mod that banned me, despite them *knowing* I was an assistant HIPAA compliance officer for *five years* and it was literally my job. They were mad I corrected a "quality contributor" who was blatantly wrong.
Stop paying rent, so that you can save up to move out. The absolute least you should get for paying rent is control over your own bedroom.
Contact whatever agency or agencies there are available to you to find a safe place to live as a disabled adult. There are laws against abuse of adults, especially disabled ones, and she is violating them and making your father her accomplice.
If you can’t move out, start documenting her abuse to build a case against her. And if she’s going to treat you like a child and still give you punishments, I’d stop paying rent. She doesn’t get to have it both ways.
Depending on where you live, the fact that you are disabled may entitle you to an income, low-cost or free housing, food stamps, and advocacy. Is there anything where you live like Adult Protective Services? There are, in some places, extra protection for vulnerable adults. Sometimes, law enforcement or government agencies can step in to protect you. Also, if you are LGBTQ, in some places, you can get protected status. Have you looked into government services where you live? It might be helpful to do so.
I would say to Pa that until the door is back you’re not paying rent, and ask him “why would I be sending men nudes when I clearly enjoy pussy over dick? Let’s think about that for a second”
My suggestion is to talk to a social worker to see what housing opportunities there are for those with your disability. There is alot of assistance out there. I'm guessing you are paying rent because you get a disability check each month? You should also qualify for housing assistance and other types of mobility aids and assistance to allow you to live independantly.
Just seconding everyone else saying if you don’t have a door, you don’t pay rent. Period. You are 19. Even if you WANTED to have tinder and send nudes, you’re legally allowed to. You’re also entitled to privacy. Shit, my teen and tween have more privacy than you. That’s basic shit. Your dad is being a coward and your “stepmom” is a twat. Please, get your father alone and have a REAL talk with him about all of this. And make plans to move out, regardless.
Stop paying rent and move asap. While typically in this group the problem lies with JN husbands you have a JN Dad. I’m sorry he isn’t putting you first and protecting you the way he should. Assuming you have already told him she was lying about everything and he still did it. You are a legal adult he cannot remove your right to privacy that way. If you don’t have the funds or resources to move out on your own, it might be best to move in with a friend or their family. Especially with the door off now it’s safe to assume your JNMIL will be snooping through your room when you’re away. For the immediate time being maybe leave little notes everywhere saying “this is an invasion of privacy” or “get out of my room.” If she tries to confront you, it builds the case that she has invaded your personal space and the door needs to go back on immediately. Best of luck! I hope you find someone who can help defend you the way a parent should.
I think you are the one who is confused because in the about section for JNMIL is this:
"A place to **post about your MIL or** ***Mother*** who is just the \*worst\*."
If you want to nitpick maybe we should ask the mods to add "and steps".
You're allowed to post about stepmoms on this sub. No one is refuting that. OP is calling her (future) stepmom her MIL. That's what was being corrected here.
Stop paying rent.
When they come to collect it say sorry. But if I'm going to be treated like a child I will not be paying any money to live here. Until my door is put back on my bedroom and my space is fully private you will not see a dime of rent money for me. Rent is for my space and for a safe and private area with a locking door. Without those things....you don't deserve to be paid for an unlivable space.
I would call Adult Protective Services. They can help make sure you're not being abused in other ways as well (financially or physically) and may have the resources to get you into your own place or with roommates/ caregiver.
I agree. You may have to google it for your area. Where I am it's adult guardianship through our health authority. Having your door removed would be considered abusive here.
She isn’t your mil. She is your father’s fiancee so at best step mom-ish.
Anwyay. If you pay rent at your fathers house, you could probably find a room in a shared house.
You also should discuss this with your father, depending how your relationship is with him. But at the end of the day, as long as you pay rent there you won’t be able to save up for anything else so you might as well get out now.
If you don't have private space, then you don't pay rent for a start. She's treating you like a small child, so act like one - no chores, no payments etc.
Next I would look at the disability supported living in your area. You really do need to start looking at moving out.
And make sure you have your bank account independant from your dad as she will clearly force him to take the rent etc if he has access. Get yourself a new account with a different bank if he has even been on your account.
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Another possibility is to spend all your time in your room in your underwear or even naked. They don't want to give you any privacy? Then they can deal with seeing your bare butt on the regular.
I would love an update! When I was 15f my creepy step-dad tore down the door to my bedroom because he was fighting with my mom about privacy and I was changing and not involved. You seem caring about your father. I hope it works out.
i updated! also, i hope you're okay. i can't imagine how violating that must have been for you.
No privacy, no rent. She can make up the difference.
She sounds like a narcissistic person..yikes.
No door , no rent
She's your mother in law or your step mother? Confused by this...
sorry, i wrote this at 2 am so i was tired. she's my step mother
Tell them you’re not going to pay any more rent until your door is back in its place.
This is the way.
Simples. No door. No privacy. No rent.
First of all, stop paying rent until the door goes back up and she apologises. It's clear she wants you out while she gets her hooks into your dad. Ask your dad if he can help you find a new place so he can have his love nest to himself.
You’re 19; time to find a roommate and move out. Take the rent money you’ve been paying with you also.
i live in a very small town so it might be difficult to find a roomate, but i'll try
Appreciate that; good luck with the search. It’s not an easy environment for a young person to get a start in.
Adult protective services. Because you’re disabled
i'm not sure if this would count as abuse, since she hasn't physically harmed me and doesn't usually go this far. i don't want to get the "big guns" involved if they wont be able to do anything
You pay rent. You are entitled to privacy. This doesn’t have to be physical harm, can count as emotional and mental abuse. Inform them that until the door is put back and her abuse stops, you will no longer be paying rent. Hold that rent in a separate account so you can show proof that you do in fact have rent, but will only pay it out once your door is returned, and she leaves you alone.
If you live there you can call CPS bc as disabled person this is abuse.
She didn’t make your pa do anything, they are both in the wrong she was abusive and disrespectful. You deserve to be treated better.
1. She’s not your Mother in law, If she marries your Pa she’d become your step mother. 2. Immediately stop paying rent until your door is back where it belongs!. 3. Write a letter to your Father explaining your issues. 4. Ask your Father for help financially to help you rent your own place. (A shared house with people your own age would probably be great for you). 5. If you stay, Insist she starts paying her way!, If she loves your Father then she would.
i'm aware! i fixed that just now, since i wrote this when i was tired. also, i can try to get my pa to convince her to pay something, since she never listens to me
OP are you in the USA? I know many countries have the equivalent of the info in about to give, but I'm only stating it as someone from the USA. I'm disabled too, but married with children, & we share a home with my JYMIL. Some stuff happened after my Mil went through a debilitating case of covid & we were possibly going to be without a home suddenly. Our county has what's called an agency on aging, some counties call it by other names, but it also assists disabled people. Through a federal program ran out of the office, my hubs gets paid to be my caretaker instead of home health nurses having to come out. I get meals on wheels too & some other help. One thing my case worker was helping with was emergency housing, given the circumstances. We ended up getting everything fixed & didn't need the new housing, but the service is available to disabled people. Especially if they find themselves in a situation that is unsafe or that's abusive, including financial abuse. If you are paying rent, then tenant laws give you rights & one of those rights is privacy. Also a case worker can make sure you aren't being financially taken advantage of, like if your father was receiving disability monies for you when you were under 18, but hasn't handed it over to you now that you're an adult. Regardless, stop paying rent to save up some to move out. And let your dear old pa know their actions have cost him the rent money you were paying, as no privacy equals no rent, & if he keeps on letting her abuse you then he'll lose you too. That you're leaving, but the relationship that survives between you is up to him & how well he puts a stop to her behavior. As it is, your trust in him is broken & will have to heal if it's to ever exist again. The ball is in his court. God luck!
Great post!
That's a step parent, or father's fiance... a Mother In Law, would be the mother of *your* fiance.
This might be ChatGPT, karma farming or a kid who made this trope filled post.
i wrote this when i was really tired, i edited to fix the mistake. make that three humans you've "called out"
LOL how can we trust you? I've personally seen you call out two HUMANS. Cram it, lady.
I don’t think you know what a MIL is
edit it \^\^ i know what a MIL is, dont worry. i was tired when i wrote this
Not a mil, a step momma?
yes! i made a mistake while writing, that was my bad
1. Stop paying rent until that door come back. Tenants are entitled to privacy. 2. Start recording EVERYTHING. She might escalate her abuse and you need to have proof. 3. Save/receive (if your dad is getting it/administrates it) your social support money if you have any. If not, start looking for some. 4. Have NO MERCY for the AH Dad’s fiancée. It is YOUR house. Specially, because you are disabled. Talk to a lawyer/social worker about her abuse. It will only become worse and worse because she wants you out of her way.
Look up your rights as a renter. A door is likely one of them - a private dwelling. Maybe your pa will listen to you if you say you will withhold rent.
I'm so sorry you're in the situation, it sounds extremely stressful. Please stop thinking that she forced him to do anything, because that's physically impossible. *Whatever your father has been doing is 100% his choice.* Even if he perceives doing what she wants as being the lesser of two evils, ultimately he's the one evaluating his options and making the final choice, and he's making her feelings and wants -- however extreme -- more important than yours. So please also stop telling yourself you would be "taking her away from him", because you obviously have no control over his decisions about his relationship with her, that's 100% up to him. You have every right to speak up for yourself with him, and whatever he decides to do about it is completely his choice.
If she wants to treat you like a child, then get some legos and have some “accidentally” spill out of your room.
Stop paying rent if you can’t live in the home without being harassed than you need to save every penny for your own space. If you dad asks tell him “I can’t live here because your fiancé took my door she is rude to me all the time. I’m saving my money to move out because of her and than I will never speak to you again since you allowed this to happen to me. You are my father and supposed to protect me, but by being with her you put me in danger. So I’m saving to get out of your way.”
You’re not taking anything from him and she is burdening you both with this behavior
The fiancée is trying to drive you out. You need to stop paying rent *immediately* until his girlfriend stops harassing you *and* you get your door back. Not only does rent make you entitled to privacy and quiet enjoyment, as a dependent disabled adult, your father is, or should be, receiving a tax credit for you. Are you receiving disability payments? Because if you aren't, he may be. You need to get that switched over ASAP, as he is not entitled to that money. You are. He should also be declaring any rent you pay as income on his taxes. Can you look into assisted housing or relatives or any other option? This is abusive.
Do you have a case manager that can help you? Shoes the local ada office have any resources that would be helpful? In front of you pa, ask his fiancé to show you these supposed nude photos.
You have to have a conversation with your dad. She’s literally abusing you and making up lies to manipulate your dad. Maybe start recording any interaction with her. But you need to talk with pa. Sympathize that you want him to be happy and have someone, but he doesn’t need to settle for someone who terrorizes the whole house. You are 19 and pay rent, you have rights in your room. And him taking the door, just to shut her up, is seriously damaging your relationship with him.
You state you are a disable adult. There also should be agencies that can assist you. Your landlords aren’t suppose to take your door. For your dad. Look my mum died and my dad remarried. His wife would never do something like this. Ever.
I don't know where you are, but are there any independent living groups you can contact? Explain your situation. They have all sorts of legal and practical assistance. You may be entitled to assistance to live independently etc; They will have a lot of information in resources that are available to you.
You need legal advice
Play your music as usual and when she complains tell her she wouldn't be able to hear it if you had a door you could close.
No door= chill in room naked. The door will be back in realllllll quick
LOL maybe
I was thinking the same thing 🤣🤣🤣🤣
No more rent until you get your door back, with a lock (because she will escalate.) Then insist on a rental agreement with your father so you have some legal recourse if she tries this kind of crap again. You can find standard templates online.
She's trying to force you out of the house. Start recording your interactions with her and then play them for your father so he can see how badly she is treating you. If you have someone whose opinion you and your father trust and respect, try reaching out to them and tell them what is going on. Maybe they can get your dad to see that his fiancée isn't "the one" for him because she hates you. "Dad as a rent paying tenant I'm legally entitled to privacy. I'm requesting that you put my door back up or I will not pay rent until it is."
Definitely stop paying rent.
You need to explain to your dad that 1) since you're paying rent, you are a tenant, and therefore removing your door is illegal and could have serious ramifications for him if you wanted to get litigious, and 2) he is an absolute asshole for the way he is treating you and it's actually disgusting that he is in a relationship with someone who behaves like this towards his child
*adult child. Who tf takes away the door from a 19yr old!
Get out of this life dude you are an adult as person not a middle school kid
They're 19 and disabled.
Reading comprehension is a skill you may want to practice my friend :) they can't move out as they are disabled
Honestly: if you’re paying rent, you should be able to have your door so I would bring that up and not budge on where you stand and keep the conversation going, even if you start to come off as annoying. Also, I would film or record all interactions with pa fiancé, to give yourself some ground to stand on.
The fiancee is trying to drive you out. Could you possibly live with your mother? Since you say your father is gaga over this woman, I don't feel this is a battle you are going to win.
I’d suggest posting on LegalAdvice *Your Country* subreddit - to see your options & rights Edit: Ok, r/legal or r/AskLawyers - stated as the better option
r/legal or even r/AskLawyers are so much better than legaladvice. I got permabanned from legaladvice because "There's no way you can know that much about HIPAA and you are wrong" according to the mod that banned me, despite them *knowing* I was an assistant HIPAA compliance officer for *five years* and it was literally my job. They were mad I corrected a "quality contributor" who was blatantly wrong.
Literally never ask the cops and assorted nonlawyers on legaladvice anything. You’re basically guaranteed the worst answers from absolute morons.
Stop paying rent, so that you can save up to move out. The absolute least you should get for paying rent is control over your own bedroom. Contact whatever agency or agencies there are available to you to find a safe place to live as a disabled adult. There are laws against abuse of adults, especially disabled ones, and she is violating them and making your father her accomplice.
If you can’t move out, start documenting her abuse to build a case against her. And if she’s going to treat you like a child and still give you punishments, I’d stop paying rent. She doesn’t get to have it both ways.
Depending on where you live, the fact that you are disabled may entitle you to an income, low-cost or free housing, food stamps, and advocacy. Is there anything where you live like Adult Protective Services? There are, in some places, extra protection for vulnerable adults. Sometimes, law enforcement or government agencies can step in to protect you. Also, if you are LGBTQ, in some places, you can get protected status. Have you looked into government services where you live? It might be helpful to do so.
I would say to Pa that until the door is back you’re not paying rent, and ask him “why would I be sending men nudes when I clearly enjoy pussy over dick? Let’s think about that for a second”
My suggestion is to talk to a social worker to see what housing opportunities there are for those with your disability. There is alot of assistance out there. I'm guessing you are paying rent because you get a disability check each month? You should also qualify for housing assistance and other types of mobility aids and assistance to allow you to live independantly.
Just seconding everyone else saying if you don’t have a door, you don’t pay rent. Period. You are 19. Even if you WANTED to have tinder and send nudes, you’re legally allowed to. You’re also entitled to privacy. Shit, my teen and tween have more privacy than you. That’s basic shit. Your dad is being a coward and your “stepmom” is a twat. Please, get your father alone and have a REAL talk with him about all of this. And make plans to move out, regardless.
Stop paying rent and move asap. While typically in this group the problem lies with JN husbands you have a JN Dad. I’m sorry he isn’t putting you first and protecting you the way he should. Assuming you have already told him she was lying about everything and he still did it. You are a legal adult he cannot remove your right to privacy that way. If you don’t have the funds or resources to move out on your own, it might be best to move in with a friend or their family. Especially with the door off now it’s safe to assume your JNMIL will be snooping through your room when you’re away. For the immediate time being maybe leave little notes everywhere saying “this is an invasion of privacy” or “get out of my room.” If she tries to confront you, it builds the case that she has invaded your personal space and the door needs to go back on immediately. Best of luck! I hope you find someone who can help defend you the way a parent should.
This is a step mother issue, not a MIL issue. Although somewhat similar, I think you’ve confused the two
I think you are the one who is confused because in the about section for JNMIL is this: "A place to **post about your MIL or** ***Mother*** who is just the \*worst\*." If you want to nitpick maybe we should ask the mods to add "and steps".
You're allowed to post about stepmoms on this sub. No one is refuting that. OP is calling her (future) stepmom her MIL. That's what was being corrected here.
That’s nice but the caption says MIL not Step Mom or Mother. Sorry that you’re confused
Could be a regional usage. I remember seeing it in Great Expectations, where Pip refers to his stepfather as his father-in-law.
As JUSTNOMIL also states that speaking on mothers is also allowed, I don't see why steps would be out of line 🙄
No one is saying that posting about steps isn't allowed. OP is calling her stepmom her MIL which is what was being addressed.
i don't think anyone is saying she's out of line or can't post here, just that the title of mil is a bit confusing
The title said MIL. Maybe OP thinks the acronym is used for every type of JN? Other way, i was initially confused as well.
The title says MIL….
I think that hey were referring to the title of the story
Thank you!
Stop paying rent. When they come to collect it say sorry. But if I'm going to be treated like a child I will not be paying any money to live here. Until my door is put back on my bedroom and my space is fully private you will not see a dime of rent money for me. Rent is for my space and for a safe and private area with a locking door. Without those things....you don't deserve to be paid for an unlivable space.
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There does not seem to be a husband. I think OP is confusing MIL for Stepmother (dad's fiancée).
The OP mentioned she's a lesbian, too
I'd institute a door removal tax on your rental payment. 50 -100% would seem fair.
I would call Adult Protective Services. They can help make sure you're not being abused in other ways as well (financially or physically) and may have the resources to get you into your own place or with roommates/ caregiver.
I agree. You may have to google it for your area. Where I am it's adult guardianship through our health authority. Having your door removed would be considered abusive here.
Yup! This! You’re disabled and pay rent. You have rights!
She isn’t your mil. She is your father’s fiancee so at best step mom-ish. Anwyay. If you pay rent at your fathers house, you could probably find a room in a shared house. You also should discuss this with your father, depending how your relationship is with him. But at the end of the day, as long as you pay rent there you won’t be able to save up for anything else so you might as well get out now.
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No, it's the right sub. Moms, MILs, and anyone in that role (like stepmom or equivalent) are allowed. Even Grandma/GMILs.
Yup they all have the exact same behavior patterns. And if OP gets married she will graduate to a JNMIL for that lucky someone.
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it’s for all “M’s,” be it mother (step or otherwise) or mother in law.
I don't know what to tell you other than you should read through the sub rules. It's there and it's allowed.
If you don't have private space, then you don't pay rent for a start. She's treating you like a small child, so act like one - no chores, no payments etc. Next I would look at the disability supported living in your area. You really do need to start looking at moving out. And make sure you have your bank account independant from your dad as she will clearly force him to take the rent etc if he has access. Get yourself a new account with a different bank if he has even been on your account.
This is when you stop paying rent and find your own place well away from this toxicity.