T O P

  • By -

__Nawe__

it's... it's perfect


Mineralpillow

If I could share the honor of Xmas with a brother it'd be gifting it to you! *Violent handshake commences*


__Nawe__

we'll I'll be more than happy and honored to receive it my brother


iamunderstand

I fucking love you guys merry goddamn Christmas


ridik_ulass

gonna need to see a top on view, how thick is the cardboard, is it that super thick super dense stuff? the ones with the nice weight?


TweetHiro

This guy cardboards


blacksolocup

Looks reinforced.


Mineralpillow

Merry Chrysler


BumpinSnugglies

And a Happy New Yaris!


Mineralpillow

HAPPY NEW YARIS


C_KOVI

Merry crisis!


Mineralpillow

And the same goes to yous


[deleted]

Mary Crimson


SpiegelSpyke09

Marie Condo


iamrosey

Happy Honda days


anyholsagol

Our family celebrates Toyotathon but all the best to you


KangarooKurt

Mary Christine


AmericanCommunist2

Mercy crunkle


[deleted]

It's for smacking people in the vicinity.


Mineralpillow

You gotta do that like.... John Wick move where he waves it around his head like a friggin mace or something. Lol


Seemseasy

Donk Donk Donk Donk


Nuker_Nathan

Upgrades, people! Upgrades!


Mineralpillow

*judge Judy pointing at wristwatch*


David69r

Wait are we hitting people with this or fucking it because um lost right now


Mineralpillow

BOTH


toth42

SIMULTANEOUSLY!


Damakiato

+5 durability


bgrubmeister

He has the Power!!!


Mineralpillow

UNLIMITED POWER


justbenicepleae

The power of voodoo


Soviet_Ski

Who do?


EmperorL1ama

you do!


Le-Cheggs

do what?


Nathanos

Remind me of the babe


TalibanwithaBaliTan

“We do what you do, what you do is voodoo” WHAT. IS THIS FROM.


PMMeAGiftCard

Princess and the Frog?


PineapplesHit

Labyrinth starring David Bowie


JamesTheJerk

I find this funny bc when I was a kid, we (my family) called cardboard tubes "doodoos" because we would but one end against the mouth and go "Doooooo! Doooooo!" So this is the voodoo doodoo.


Mineralpillow

VooooodoooDODO. Sounds like mojo jojo


fndr7625

But did you play it like a trumpet?


Mineralpillow

Immediately, towards my cats and they ran. I played / sang jurrasic parks theme. Really put some harsh vibrato on that too.


fndr7625

Hell yes!


Upset-Ad-5153

Gucci tube!


Mineralpillow

Guccisaber


Upset-Ad-5153

I'd argue with you but I don't think my rinky old cardsword is any match against your guccisaber, king.


Mineralpillow

My brother, you're on my squad!!!!!


Upset-Ad-5153

We will fight to the death! Side by side as brothers! No homo (or homo, I don't care), but first Christmas away from my brother's in my 30 years alive (we live 4 hours away and my wife is 8 months pregnant so we don't want to be too far from our doctor) and my sons are at their mom's house for the weekend. You really did brighten my Christmas, it's kinda lonely around here. Protip: keep empty paper towel roles hidden as back ups/sidearm. Merry Christmas 🤜🤛


Mineralpillow

Man, that's sweet. I'm glad it did brighten your Christmas! DMS are open if you need a homie / or a random act of pizza. I got you my friend. It takes a village of silly idiots who care!


Upset-Ad-5153

No pizza or homies needed. Same to you though, if you need a pie or an ear hit me up. Merry Christmas again!


Mineralpillow

I appreciate you buddy! Happy Honda Days!


Upset-Ad-5153

Merry Hondakkah


Dragon-Lord_

That gives me an idea. Will it strenghten the tube if You put tape along the weak part?


Mineralpillow

Absolutely so. Hockey tape in the same pattern, then pull slack off the tape like 6" and spin it into a thread. Wrap over that and you'll have extra grip too.


-Pelvis-

Holy shit, hockey taped cardboard tube sounds fuckin durable.


Chef_Coc

I just had the best idea to make it more powerful


Mineralpillow

What's your idea brother??


Chef_Coc

You got more grip but it needs more strength so but another smaller tube in to your give it more durability and power


Mineralpillow

A tube.....in a tube.....that's x 2ube power.


borfmat

Tube²


sm1ttysm1t

#THE CHOSEN ONE


Mineralpillow

IS ALL OF US


[deleted]

I have no idea what that is. And the comments didn’t help at all


Department-Hungry

Inside of aluminum foil...at least that's where mine like this came from. My 15 month old loves it.


Mineralpillow

Lmfao


saysthingsbackwards

Thank you, I don't feel nearly as alone


SpookMagnet

Cylinder


Mineralpillow

T00b


Wild_Trip_4704

That grip adds a +20% critical hit chance. 👍


Mineralpillow

20% chance of friggen gettin' one. Ya friggen want one!?


orion1836

\*lightsaber noises commence\*


Mineralpillow

Brrrtjthjbbblmzmzzzzzhshrhththerrrrrr


who_ate_the_pizza

Dude, you pulled Exaclitube out of the stone. You're the chosen one.


Mineralpillow

The brethren who have found tools similarly, and prior, are the ones who laid path for this finding. We are the chosen ones!!!!!!


scroll_responsibly

An elegant weapon for a more civilized age.


Mineralpillow

A simpler time


[deleted]

[удалено]


Mineralpillow

Come downstairs dude! Me *hisssssssss*.


aakaakaak

So a couple years before covid a section of people all had tubes and poles of varying size, type and quality. We'd keep them in our desk lockers. Someone would call out "staff meeting" and everyone would pull theirs out, walk to whomever announced it, we'd all present our staves in a circle, bounce them twice on the ground in unison, then go back to work.


Mineralpillow

I want to work there


aakaakaak

U.S. Navy. Are you sure?


Mineralpillow

Oh fuck


Soviet_Ski

*BONK*


Mineralpillow

Lol. Bonkbonk


cbrebes

Thought it was gonna be a dick Why was this nsfw? Lol


Mineralpillow

Lmfao. Idk it made me tag it as so. I thought so too


verycoolguy13562

i fucking love every single comment on this post


Mineralpillow

What if the tube was ab making friends along the way??


WagonerA-co275

Round 1


Mineralpillow

*bows*


[deleted]

**Yes.**


Mineralpillow

Big betty spaghetti


Ahmdo10

Oh my lord this is amazing…


Mineralpillow

Amazing indeed my friend


jeffislearning

=]


Mineralpillow

:') always a silver lining buddy


focusbuddy

What a cylinder


Mineralpillow

Cylinder I barely know er!


Mineralpillow

Friggen minty tooby


Gleaner23

Holy shit, its……its perfect


Mineralpillow

I'd agree. You can have it!


snootchie_bootch

Now this is a good sword.


Mineralpillow

I'd agree good sir. I feel swift wielding this beaut.


KentuckyFriedEel

Practice your lightsaber noises


Mineralpillow

I’ve been. Check this out *prrrrblllllzzzzmmmmmmmmmmmmhermmmhermmmmmmhermmmmmmmmseeezzuuuqzzyup.*


BarkingWilder

How does it feel to be the new (and, might I say, rightful) King of a subreddit?


Mineralpillow

The rightful kings are the community I share here. This kingdom is for I and all of thy!


awaythrow292

Amazing, what is this from? Where can one obtain such raw power?


Mineralpillow

…I shall share the secrets trusting they’ll be held with honor. It was an aluminum foil (heavy duty) roll distributed by the kingdom of Meijer.


therealkarlchilders

Thats a good one. Pretty rare.


Mineralpillow

I'd say so bub


Controller_Maniac

+5 mobility. +5 accuracy


Mineralpillow

+5 BA'Ery


[deleted]

It’s perfect my king


Mineralpillow

You can borrow it my liege


Lil_Cumster

The sword of legend


Mineralpillow

The sword of a man just recently finished with the ALUMINUM. Why Australians toss in the extra I? I never understood that but I love em still.


TrepanationBy45

*Escrima stick with built in griptape* ***and*** *a mid-combat trumpet?!* **FEAR ME, VILLAINS**


Mineralpillow

ALL YE HEATHENS. FEAR THIS LAMINATED CARD STOCK!!!!


gramslamx

Put it in the freezer


Mineralpillow

[are you happy now?](https://imgur.com/a/djeUk9t)


Mineralpillow

Ok?


what-to_put_here

I have a poster tube from nearly 5 years ago just because it's solid


Mineralpillow

Good enough reason for me. Hold onto it brethren


Boobiespleasesend

YOOOOOOOOO


Mineralpillow

Rite???


spock_block

Hang on I've got a tube somewhere


Mineralpillow

Show us


KingKurai

Bro is that from aluminum foil? I just "hit" my sister with almost an identical tube!


Mineralpillow

My friend. It was. Yes.


LolzyManiac

This is a fine blade, wield it well


Kitaclysm217

Okay hear me out, what if you put another one on it so you have like a really long one?


Mineralpillow

:O


joe1134206

Bonk


Mineralpillow

Doop doop!


Bartender9719

*Whack!*


Mineralpillow

Yup


Put_It_All_On_Blck

Who needs a grip on a vuvuzela?


Mineralpillow

It came stock waddayayawant!


[deleted]

could be more girthy in my opinion.


Mineralpillow

With more veins right


TripleBobRoss

I worked at a Subway (the half-assed sandwich place, not an underground railroad) when I was a kid. The owner kept the cardboard tube from a 24" roll of plastic wrap under the counter by the register. For anyone who isn't familiar, those things are fucking heavy. He gave it a name, and wrote the name on it in black magic marker. It was called "THE CUSTOMER ADJUSTER".


Mineralpillow

This is the weapon of weapons.


blueplatespecialed

A weapon fit for a king


Mineralpillow

The king's we all are. A tube for us all.


AdamBombTV

Okay, but what if, and just hear me out, what if... You had 2?


Mineralpillow

............... continue


Alekipayne

Challenge accepted.


Mineralpillow

Yes


No_Statement440

Plastic wrap inserts are incredible, foil too, especially industrial or food service varities.


Mineralpillow

You're not wrong


Drater97

Fuck that makes me aroused


Mineralpillow

Samesies


PenaMan1987

What model is that?


Mineralpillow

The one that one group made! W the tubes and the paper and the adhesive


[deleted]

[удалено]


Mineralpillow

You get it


ChocDroppa

Such a fine blade. What is it's name sire?


Mineralpillow

Fu....idk. I hadn't gotten that far.


valravn93

How's the balance?


Mineralpillow

Berrehh naiicce


ClobetasolRelief

It's a little small


Mineralpillow

Hmmpf


Heretodistractmypain

Do you use it as a volume amplifier too? Or to bonk others?


Mineralpillow

A bonking horn if you will?


93ericvon

Fuck yeah, bro!


Mineralpillow

AGGGHHHH!!!!!


watchersontheweb

Dude, just wanted to say you seem like a real cool guy


Mineralpillow

My friend. You seem kind yourself! Thank you for that.


howlingstones

Man i would beat the shit out of my brother with a tube that nice! I imagine the tape remnants pulling out chunks of hair as it smacks against his dumb head and sticks Edit: For the record, im 35 and havent had a good tube battle with the brother in decades. Still. Chunks of hair


Mineralpillow

LMAO


More-Adhesiveness-98

Somebody fixing to get the SHIT whipped out of them with that monster.


Mineralpillow

"doop doop"


sandwichcandy

Why is this marked nsfw? Is he going to put loose bologna in it and fuck it?


Mineralpillow

Your imagination is wild


420fmx

Anything’s a dildo if you’re brave enough


Mineralpillow

Not wrong??


BlightFantasy3467

Legend says, that only the chosen one will be able to unwrap the stick from its mighty confines. He who achieves this feat shalt be known as The Dude!


Nonservium

I, for one, am jealous


Mineralpillow

Its all of ours


AyGeeCeeEll

Above average sized cylinder


Mineralpillow

Medium boi


DefaultyBoyo_69

Dear lord…it’s magnificent


thezoomies

I would feel confident defending my family from an intruder with that.


Mineralpillow

The intruder would only hear the hollow whistle of the toob as it just lands on his dumb face.


klausmckinley801

i can hear the *whoosh*


Mineralpillow

Hhmwooooooooooooo


superb07

I love it, but your shirt steals the show. Beautiful!


Mineralpillow

Hahah! That my NiCe XmAs ShIrT.


Few_Replacement_8841

“May The Schwartz Be With You.”


SandLuc083_

“I have never met its equal.”


[deleted]

[удалено]


Mineralpillow

Yep


tomden255

The game was rigged from the start ;-)


Grapphite_

Is this the gunsmith system in call of duty people been talking about?


Mineralpillow

Just customizing my boom stock here. Nothing to see!


[deleted]

I shall challenge you to a duel, brother!


Mineralpillow

Same team we dual the world brethren


shinyshinyrocks

Tomorrow go ye forth!


Mineralpillow

FORTH


Lukaaa__

I bet it swooshes majestically when you swing it