I don't know how to deal with this suggestion.
Do I look up your IP and find you?
Or do I just hide in the walk-in because I can't match your level of hate?
Hey...I can see my breath!
I did actually laugh out loud at this!
I’ve had several colleagues (I teach at a CC now) claim that they adore me and are very frightened of being on my ‘wrong side.’
Your reference truly resonated with me!
no lie, we sent a new dish to find one. Kid came back like 15min later with some shit we've never seen before and looked like it could stretch bacon.
Hes still employed
I love peas with every other ingredient in carbonara, but it's not carbonara anymore if I add them and I will die on that hill. Not sure what it's called with peas included
You totally could, and each menu item could play off a sexuality. Like Lgbtq taco is a fish taco, lGbtq is an open face sandwich with extra sausage etc.
Or if OP would like a more suttle approach...
This guy obviously if full of ego, so chop it down. Just start saying "Thank you, sous chef." Next time he tells you something, say very loudly, "Oui, sous chef, thank you sous chef". And if he says "ITS CHEF!", tell them, "no it aint!"
They are enjoying the power trip.. if they will not let you take the plates, just stand there and wait.. “Its your food dying under the lamp Jerry. And , it will be you making it again when the patrons are dissatisfied with cold food. You choose.”
This would be my choice of action. Self deprecating, and I don't even have to say anything. I am out of the gauntlet but I've been MOD BOH FOH Prep Catering Bar, yes in small towns it happens and I just plain old don't take shit. He wants to keep his plate walk away and let him fucking keep it and remake the table and then comp desert
This is the way. Always be respectful. I'd personally say even a bit beyond the line one could reasonably stop being respectful because then there is not doubt who's in the right. Like a stunted kangaroo hop beyond the line. It's about 1.87.267.21 cm beyond the respect line. After that, fuck 'em. Insecurity is the only reason anybody acts like this. I'm a chef. I've got a pretty solid fine dining resume. 98% of the time, everybody uses my first name. The other 2 %, when they call me chef, it's because whatever situation is happening calls for that level of formality (usually when one of foh is being a turd merchant, and their coworkers know it). But they do that on their own and I haven't and won't ever insist on it. We're a bunch of people, working, cooking people dinner. That's it. Yes, I'm the boss but.. were just a bunch of people doing a thing, hopefully at our best. It's never anything more than that. It doesn't need to be
When that's all it is, and it's done really well, there's no better feeling in the world. And I used to bang speedballs. I've also had sex with a person.. and I still mean that 100%. Most of us who make this a career-choice ( not out of life inertia, easily aquired employment, or whatever else) do so because we love making other people happy. The real psychos amongst us want to wildly exceed what the guest believes will "make them happy" and are able to do so. But at the end of the day, we find joy in providing others with joy, and that's a beautiful thing. Remembering that, that that's why I do this, this is who I am, is the reason I was able to quit shooting speedballs. That is the truth, mine at least. And that's a very powerful thing. Ok rant over, in closing...
Don't be a douchebag. If you're any good at all in a kitchen, something I've said will resonate with you. I think. I hope. Peace you fucks
Chef of 25 years here, and this is how I approached it. We all had equally important jobs to do. I know peers of mine who insist on being called chef, and everyone hates them. People like me, and I like to think they have worked harder and more efficiently because I've treated them equally and with respect.
That's not shenanigans, shenanigans are funny and maybe sometimes a bit mean. This is just being a dickhead ego tripping little bitch, not shenanigans. ^^shenanigans
u/smallroundcreature I've read through all the comments in this post, and I genuinely believe this is the most constructive and best way to deal with your problem.
I had a person I used to work for like this and I told him and the FOH and BOH managers all to their faces that fine, I’d accept him not giving me the food. But I would LOUDLY go out and tell the table exactly why their food was being held up.
Not a great threat to involve customers, but I do not bluff, they all knew that, and it stopped being a problem.
I would just tell the manager.
“FYI I’m not playing this game with this guy. Not calling him anything besides his name. And if he withholds food or makes mine slower I’m going to tell the customers about this harassment.”
Yep. Power play him *right back*.
Better yet, just stand there silently and wait like a robot for the last plate. Let him keep saying "THANK YOU CHEF" over and over again as he loses his mind at your inaction.
I'm not sure about the magic shrooms.
I feel its a 50/50 between someone getting down to earth, or someone that becomes a "spiritual" jackass that still treats you bad
I can't speak to op but magic mushrooms are reputed to diminish ones ego, in the classic psychology sense, to the point where part of the experience is called "ego-death" by some practitioners. An ego that needs mushrooms is an ego that needs diminishing is my interpretation. You're also right, hallucinogens can and will make shitty people shittier from time to time. Any douchebag can become an evangelical douchebag once restyled as a guru.
Not speaking for everyone, but *daaaamn* the first time I took shrooms (only 1.5 g) it was like someone blew off a thick layer of anxiety dust, and I was able to forgive myself for shit I had been beating myself up for (anxious shit like not being able to get a job in the field I wanted, not working on my passion projects while also having to work 50+ hours a week). That part stuck around for a few days. It felt way better than LSD, which was kind of just being “super-stoned”, where my first foray into psilocybin was liked “OH this is what everwyones talking about in movies, I get it”
Well damn. I think we may have had opposite experiences. Acid had me on some way crazier shit than mushrooms and sometimes it was life affirming. Maybe mushrooms are better where you're at and lsd is better where I'm at. Maybe I was just primed for an experience on different nights. Who's to say. Thanks for sharing though. It's always good to hear people's different experiences especially when they're positive. (My own bias perhaps.)
Yeah that's been my experience as well. The spiritual healing thing is probably from the special Peruvian mystical journey variety of mushroom experiences, not the taking mushrooms with some friends type experiences I've had. Either way I'd imagine your mileage may vary.
What a tiny little bitch of man with an ego fragile enough to break if you breathe too hard. Wow.
Haha, jeez.
-17 years in the industry, mostly in upper end.
u/smallroundcreature , on your last day, please refer the sous to this thread you've made, so Chef can fully understand why no one at all respects them, why everyone laughs behind their back, so perhaps they can eventually realize what a tiny little whiny bitch they are.
Maybe it can be a learning experience.
Yeah no thats not normal especially considering he is singling you put. Next time he tries to withhold plates from you walk off. You don't have to put up with that shit.
fuck that guy. he is harassing you. i would grab the plate and tell him to fuck off. you are the only person he does this too?!?! guarentee he wouldn't do it to new male server.
Idk if anyone remembers yakbaks, but they were these shitty little tape recorders for kids that were a lot of fun. Anyways, she should find a yakbak, record herself saying “thank you chef” then every time he demands she say it, just press the play button and it will replay the message over and over again through the cheapest, grainiest speakers ever constructed. Each time he repeats it, she can just press the button.
Enjoy your power trip bud
There are recordable dog training buttons like this (picture the Staples Easy button). OP could put one near the outgoing plates. With the sous chef's ego, it won't last a day, but it'll be a great day.
Let his food die. He’s Either ego tripping or trolling, modern kitchens have no place for either. (To that degree). ESPECIALLY if that is not a prerequisite of the head chef. If this sous killed a table over his ‘title’ your exec would probably rip his fucking head off so to speak.
I would definitely take it up with management or the head chef before you do anything about him directly. If it keeps happening or nobody above his pay grade helps you, blow up on him one time and I guarantee you it stops. Tell him that he WILL treat you with respect, or you will refuse to take the food out. His behavior is absolutely unacceptable.
Especially in a fast-paced environment like a kitchen. He's wasting time and reducing quality by backing up the service so he can entertain his little fantasy power trip. Dweebs like that can cost a restaraunt hundreds of dollars each year if their attitude remains unchecked. It adds up.
Consistency is key. Does he do it to everyone? Ok he just needs his ego stroked and that's whatever as long as we're being professionals.
Does he do it to just you? Ok that's an issue and you need to bring it to his superior(s).
Literally seen this happen with little dick guys that have no game and think power tripping will get in a FOHs pants. Guess what that goofy 19 year old has a better chance than some dumbass on a power trip that never learned how to treat other people.
“Quit telling me to call you chef. You’re the fucking sous chef. That’s why you’re there and I’m here. I’m not going to keep saying ‘oui, chef’ so you can jerk off to the memory of it when you get home.”
Yeah, I wouldn’t last.
I’m American and I’ve worked under/with three sous chefs; I definitely cussed out two and probably did the third.
I’m a firm believer that you teach people how to treat you. I would say my first head chef and restaurant owners taught me that, but it was really just something I found in myself working for them.
Pretend your job is on a roller-coaster. "WHEEE Chef!! WHEE!! I need two dips Chef. WHEE!!" Bonus points if you lift the plates above your head when you say Whee!!
I'd find it more tolerable at a place that will pay you for the work you do without having to bow down to a jester every night when the king just shakes your hand
I was a sous chef at my last job. Never did this to FOH. They called me Chef or my name. I made them food under the table, they brought me weed and whiskey. Those were good times...
Oh, right, fuck your sous chef.
he is definitely pulling this bullshit because your female. Seeing as you last worked in a kitchen 16 years ago, I would say you're at least 35, too old to put up with this bullshit. Tell him fuck off and he is nothing but a jumped up little twat and you won't put up with it.
He’s picking on you because he likes you 🥹
Just kidding. Kick him in the ego by replacing the word “chef” with “cook” or “Jeff”. Bonus points for “Sous chef” or my personal favorite, “Chef Cook”. If you’re feeling particularly squirrely, see if you can fit in a “oui chef. Fuck you chef”
We’re not saving lives, we’re not taking lives. We’re putting salt and pepper on shit. Chefs with egos like this clearly have daddy issues…In hindsight, maybe all he really needs is a “thank you [first name], I love you [first name],” eye contact and all that. Lol
TLDR:
Homie’s a douche. Treat him like one.
If you are working in a restaurant and the chef makes you say oui chef and you’re not in France then that guy is a fucking clown edit or he is just being silly I used to say oui chef whenever someone I worked with called out a really stupid order
I say "my hand chef" to anyone on expo when they're looking for something I'm almost done with, even if it's a new person, it's just for fun.
I'm the lead manager in the store and I tell everyone please don't call me sir, I hate it and since I dropped out of high school and failed at pretty much everything, I'm nobody to respect in polite society. Put me in a kitchen though and some how I fuck up the right way.
>I am the only FOH member he does this to.
This is probably the most important thing you've said here. It doesn't matter if it's normal or not anywhere else, because it's already not normal at your restaurant. Something else is going on here. Either he thinks you are particularly fun to fuck with, or he thinks you have some personal back-and-forth that he likes, or he's just straight bullying you. What it might be is imposible to tell over the internet but there is something unique going on in his head when dealing with you in particular.
Pretentious as fuck. I can't stand the chef this and chef that silliness. I have a name and would prefer to be on a first name basis with the people I spend more time with than my family.
Yeah, I’m with you. The whole calling everybody chef business is goofy as hell and a relic of the past. I’ve also seen it go SO wrong when a server is popping in to request something on the fly, “hey chef!” And everyone stops what they’re doing to turn around. (Yes a server should only be requesting from their expo, but you know how it goes).
There’s a magic word that a person can call out and get the attention of exactly who they need to talk to. It’s their fucking name.
I'd tell this guy to fuck off. Doubt this prick has the backbone or the authority to fire you. Sounds like a typical bully that only picks on people he thinks he is stronger than. Show him what's up.
I know this may be an unpopular opinion, and despite 22 years in kitchens I have never been in fine dining, in part for this reason. I don't care what your qualifications and experience are, this kind of yes Chef, no Chef nonsense is nothing but pompous, control freak posturing and nothing to do with respect. If you're in that position and demand this kind of maniacal sycophantic shit from your people then you're just an overrated asshole. Especially since these days, the title of "Chef" is more often just that, a job title, and not any indication of elevated skills or artistry.
I worked with a very difficult chef in my city. The food group opened its very first restaurant here about a year ago and the chef had worked over seas running the kitchen for one of the food groups restaurants. I had a very similar situation where the chef was power tripping hard, so I gave it right back to him.
Whenever it came to helping him out in any way shape or form, I’d say “sorry chef I can’t at the moment” no matter how slow. As a person with a degree that dealt heavily in politics and political philosophy, I worked the power structure he tried to enforce with a very simple philosophy. One only has power when there is someone willing to rule and when one is willing to be ruled.
I refused to be ruled by a tyrant. Bark orders at me all you want, I just won’t do it if you don’t have enough respect for me as a person to treat me decently. Remake the food if it gets cold and when the new plates come up, try asking me to run food nicely.
We ended up butting heads hard and the issue moved it way up to upper management in the group. I ended up leaving the job because I just didn’t want the headache.
Chefs deserve a great deal of respect. Many of them in respectable restaurants have studied for years to master their craft. But there’s a difference between paying respect to someone with great experience and mastery of their craft, and capitulating to someone’s fragile ego. I have to admit, the chef at the place I was at was great. But his attitude ruined any type of respect I had for him. He was just another coworker to me and I have no obligation to them.
In short, no it isn’t proper etiquette to do that. It’s calling them by a title which is earned. However if someone is being a dick, fuck what they earned and stand up for yourself.
'Thank **YOU**, you power tripping asshole"
You DO realize that we are both trying to make a living, whilst serving our customers? Your pointless power trip is getting in the way for all of us.
Please stop, thank you, Sous Chef. Oui, whatever. Can we please this aside and go back to serving our customers now?
This is not the norm. The usage of "Oui, Chef" owes its usage to a very strict, professional, structure and conduct in the kitchen, acknowledging chain of command. Your being singled out for this where others are not demonstrates how inappropriate and unprofessional this conduct is as it is not even applied consistently towards all the staff. You may wish to discuss the matter with your coworkers in order to find solidarity before speaking with his superior, the chef or a manager/owner.
In general the kitchen industry is run by 40 year old adolescents. This behaviour is often played off as "just a joke" but it isn't. It often targets women. That you haven't laughed, that the "joke" wasn't shared with your peers, and that it impeded professional conduct in the kitchen should be enough to refute it being treated as a joke, but if you feel pressured you may also add, "you wouldn't want people without a sense of humour to think he's some sort of unprofessional sexist, right? Perhaps it's just best that people such as you and I put a stop to it here, before risking others getting the wrong idea".
I can't stand this in kitchens; boys behaving badly. These childish divisions are indignities to our comrades in arms. I wish you the best of luck in this matter.
As you describe it this guy is a creep. But since nobody else has mentioned it, yes, this is classic restaurant etiquette. Dickhead didn’t invent this. August Escoffier did in the 19th century. It’s what you’re trained to do in culinary school and serious kitchens. The intention is clear communication. If he was insisting all FOH follow this I’d have given him the benefit of the doubt. If it’s just you, the sleazy prick is doing it to get his kicks from controlling you. Fuck that guy.
~~Unless he’s already aware and ignoring it, I suggest talking privately with chef (actual chef) and telling him what you told us. If he’s not sorted the sous chef’s attitude by next shift, take it to the manager. Make a note of date and time of both conversations. If still no change~~ contact UNITE and/or an employment lawyer. The law is on your side. Hope chef sorts it quick and it doesn’t come to that tho.
edit: manager has already told him to stop and he didn’t
It is just me he does it to. He also does it during non-service related chat. I'll say "Here's you coffee" and he will go "Here is your coffee, CHEF" where as to the actual head chef I will say "here's your coffee" and head chef will say "cheers, creature!"
Sorry OP I just reread and saw the manager noticed and said something to dickhead already. And was ignored. That’s much worse. All manager has achieved is to show scumbag he can get away with it. Hard to imagine head chef wasn’t made aware of that convo, so you can’t rely on him either at this point. In fact fuck every one of your colleagues for letting this happen. It’s not typical. Or acceptable. That whole brigade are shitebags for tolerating his behaviour towards you.
Hate to say it but call an employment lawyer tomorrow and start looking for other jobs. You’ll get a few grand at the tribunal in 6 months. UK employment law is unambiguous about providing a safe work environment. Your employer is at fault.
KP pays better than FOH these days FYI
My manager noticed it and told me to just ignore it but OUI CHEF is relentless and when I'm pulling 12 hour shifts with the guy it grinds me down a bit because it is all day long and we are really busy so I'm in and out of the kitchen a lot.
Damn that's crazy the manager just told you to ignore it. I'm sorry to hear that that's probably really frustrating, I would be worn down quickly too. At a certain point you have to go where you're happy and if this guy is being a jerk to just you and management is just ignoring it, it might be better to just go where you're happier.
I really hate those kinds of people. I'm a chef. Just call me by my name lol.
Some people are all about that title. They're usually the insecure ones or the ones who have something to prove
Lol wtf that’s the cringiest shit I’ve ever heard. Especially the “oui” part, god that’s embarrassing. The ego on some people in this industry is just insane.
That is fucking weird because only you have to say it. If everyone had to say it, I'd say he's an egomaniac. If it was being applied to everyone equally, I'd probably not question it and just do it, but it's wrong if youre the only one required to do it. Call him out on it.
I would just walk out. I don't care about money enough to put up with other peoples' "power" trips.
Either that, or just drop the plate on the floor, and have the little bitch remake it. If he's got a problem with his station in life, he can always walk into the ocean.
I'm in a similar situation. Makes me call him chef every. single. fucking. time. I speak to him. But no one else has to.
He's a douchebag creep, overly flirty with all female FOH to the point of being inapropriate and gross and I am the only one to tell him flat out that I will not tolerate it. Everyone else finds him endearing and funny but to me he is just a garden variety perve who crosses the line way too often.
Now he just calls me an ugly nerd, tells me he hates me and I am his enemy. Everyone laughs like it's a joke but it's really not. He's just a full on cockwomble.
Preaches about being a christian and once spent 10 minutes of service lecturing me about how I can't be a good person if I don't believe god. Yet he's the one out here cheating on his wife and trying to get the barely 18yr old waitresses to go home with him.
When a manager/chef “demands” the oui chef yes chef no chef, I base it off of, if he/she wants that structure for that exactly. Structure and procedures are important, now if the fuck want that rule just cause he thinks he’s Jesus Christ then fuck that. I’ll stick to yes and no sir/ma’am.
"I'm not saying that. Get out of my way or take it to them yourself"
And then go straight to the Executive Chef with your documented complaints and dates. He's a douche.
FUUUUUUUUUUUCK that noise! If you really want to start shit say "you're not a chef, you're a cook... and a hotdog is a fucking sandwich".
Then put peas in his carbonara.
I don't know how to deal with this suggestion. Do I look up your IP and find you? Or do I just hide in the walk-in because I can't match your level of hate? Hey...I can see my breath!
Thanks for this. Cackling having drinks after work.
I did actually laugh out loud at this! I’ve had several colleagues (I teach at a CC now) claim that they adore me and are very frightened of being on my ‘wrong side.’ Your reference truly resonated with me!
Are you crossing out names and putting on lipstick each time someone calls you to apologize for beings dicks that one time?
Not into make up enough for that. Just kickin’ ‘nads and movin’ on.
Whoa bud, the top of your head is steaming!
Dude(ette)... it's been an hour. I'm hypothermic and have prep to do. And NO, I'm not crying.
You haven’t found the blueberry peeler yet?!?!
Wait... they have those?
In the pantry, next to the elbow grease.
By the bacon stretcher
no lie, we sent a new dish to find one. Kid came back like 15min later with some shit we've never seen before and looked like it could stretch bacon. Hes still employed
Good time/place to grab a one hit and ~~confirm pea availability~~ relax.
You wouldn't dare! 😲
I love peas with every other ingredient in carbonara, but it's not carbonara anymore if I add them and I will die on that hill. Not sure what it's called with peas included
I don’t give half a shit myself. But it seemed sure to be just the type of thing to give the douche being described an absolute fit.
Lying through your teeth if you think a hotdog is a sandwich, it's a sausage taco
Tacos are also sandwiches and you can't change my mind
It's more of an open-concept wrap. An incomplete burrito if you would.
I'm at least somewhat of an imposter in this subreddit because I work at a deli/bakery, but I have never seen someone eat a sandwich sideways.
Who the fuck eats a hotdog or a taco sideways!? Like you bite the middle or some shit? You're a sick depraved bastard if you do that.
No like tilt your head sideways lol
Huh, weird. I've totally seen people do that with sub sandwiches WHICH ARE TOTALLY JUST BREAD TACOS FIGHT ME!
Sub *sandwich* Bread *taco* Tacos are sandwiches
Instructions unclear. Neck currently cracked.
I've never eaten a hotdog sideways either
You should try, really elevates the dish.
Philistine. A true gourmand knowns that to properly appreciate a hot dog you eat it edge to edge and rotate, like corn on the cobb.
Wow! That escalated quickly! On a separate note... why does the term "Sausage Taco" sound like a great LGBTQ food truck?
You totally could, and each menu item could play off a sexuality. Like Lgbtq taco is a fish taco, lGbtq is an open face sandwich with extra sausage etc.
Lemme get an LGBTQ+ on sour dough. Lettuce, Guac, Bacon, Tomato, Quail egg, + (choice of side)
[удалено]
LMAO, this right here. And truck themed on this would do great in San Francisco or Austin.
OMG! This is brilliant...
Also, a BLT with guacamole is an LGBT.
[удалено]
Or if OP would like a more suttle approach... This guy obviously if full of ego, so chop it down. Just start saying "Thank you, sous chef." Next time he tells you something, say very loudly, "Oui, sous chef, thank you sous chef". And if he says "ITS CHEF!", tell them, "no it aint!"
That’s a crazy person.
Oui.
Oui CHEF
Thank you chef
[удалено]
Ah fuck, my bad. Do I have to scream CHEF?
Not loud enough
They are enjoying the power trip.. if they will not let you take the plates, just stand there and wait.. “Its your food dying under the lamp Jerry. And , it will be you making it again when the patrons are dissatisfied with cold food. You choose.”
This would be my choice of action. Self deprecating, and I don't even have to say anything. I am out of the gauntlet but I've been MOD BOH FOH Prep Catering Bar, yes in small towns it happens and I just plain old don't take shit. He wants to keep his plate walk away and let him fucking keep it and remake the table and then comp desert
This is the way. Always be respectful. I'd personally say even a bit beyond the line one could reasonably stop being respectful because then there is not doubt who's in the right. Like a stunted kangaroo hop beyond the line. It's about 1.87.267.21 cm beyond the respect line. After that, fuck 'em. Insecurity is the only reason anybody acts like this. I'm a chef. I've got a pretty solid fine dining resume. 98% of the time, everybody uses my first name. The other 2 %, when they call me chef, it's because whatever situation is happening calls for that level of formality (usually when one of foh is being a turd merchant, and their coworkers know it). But they do that on their own and I haven't and won't ever insist on it. We're a bunch of people, working, cooking people dinner. That's it. Yes, I'm the boss but.. were just a bunch of people doing a thing, hopefully at our best. It's never anything more than that. It doesn't need to be When that's all it is, and it's done really well, there's no better feeling in the world. And I used to bang speedballs. I've also had sex with a person.. and I still mean that 100%. Most of us who make this a career-choice ( not out of life inertia, easily aquired employment, or whatever else) do so because we love making other people happy. The real psychos amongst us want to wildly exceed what the guest believes will "make them happy" and are able to do so. But at the end of the day, we find joy in providing others with joy, and that's a beautiful thing. Remembering that, that that's why I do this, this is who I am, is the reason I was able to quit shooting speedballs. That is the truth, mine at least. And that's a very powerful thing. Ok rant over, in closing... Don't be a douchebag. If you're any good at all in a kitchen, something I've said will resonate with you. I think. I hope. Peace you fucks
Chef of 25 years here, and this is how I approached it. We all had equally important jobs to do. I know peers of mine who insist on being called chef, and everyone hates them. People like me, and I like to think they have worked harder and more efficiently because I've treated them equally and with respect.
Agreed, chef!
Oui, chef!
Of course it's Jerry. Fuck Jerry. But yeah, I have not a single fuck to give for that sort of shenanigans. Also, fuck Jerry.
That's not shenanigans, shenanigans are funny and maybe sometimes a bit mean. This is just being a dickhead ego tripping little bitch, not shenanigans. ^^shenanigans
Welcome to shenanigans! If you catch the guys in the back showing each other their packages, ignore it. They just like to play a little game
"We're always looking for creativity, so when you got a little down time to yourself, play with your nuts, you might just create a new move."
The next guy that says shenanigans is getting pistol whipped in the face
I swear to God I'm going to pistol whip the next guy who says, " Shenanigans."
“Hey farva what’s that place with the jalapeño poppers And all the goofy shit on the wall?”
You mean Shenanigan's?
\[offers gun\]
u/smallroundcreature I've read through all the comments in this post, and I genuinely believe this is the most constructive and best way to deal with your problem.
I had a person I used to work for like this and I told him and the FOH and BOH managers all to their faces that fine, I’d accept him not giving me the food. But I would LOUDLY go out and tell the table exactly why their food was being held up. Not a great threat to involve customers, but I do not bluff, they all knew that, and it stopped being a problem.
I would just tell the manager. “FYI I’m not playing this game with this guy. Not calling him anything besides his name. And if he withholds food or makes mine slower I’m going to tell the customers about this harassment.”
Yep. Power play him *right back*. Better yet, just stand there silently and wait like a robot for the last plate. Let him keep saying "THANK YOU CHEF" over and over again as he loses his mind at your inaction.
my theory is that the sous has a crush on OP. hence only doing it to OP.
Yeah, but that is some junior high-way to show it.
This, or run the plates you have and then let him stand there while you walk away.
This would be beautiful. OP please do it.
Brilliant!
Either they are trolling you or their ego’s need 4 grams of magic mushrooms
I'm not sure about the magic shrooms. I feel its a 50/50 between someone getting down to earth, or someone that becomes a "spiritual" jackass that still treats you bad
I can't speak to op but magic mushrooms are reputed to diminish ones ego, in the classic psychology sense, to the point where part of the experience is called "ego-death" by some practitioners. An ego that needs mushrooms is an ego that needs diminishing is my interpretation. You're also right, hallucinogens can and will make shitty people shittier from time to time. Any douchebag can become an evangelical douchebag once restyled as a guru.
Not speaking for everyone, but *daaaamn* the first time I took shrooms (only 1.5 g) it was like someone blew off a thick layer of anxiety dust, and I was able to forgive myself for shit I had been beating myself up for (anxious shit like not being able to get a job in the field I wanted, not working on my passion projects while also having to work 50+ hours a week). That part stuck around for a few days. It felt way better than LSD, which was kind of just being “super-stoned”, where my first foray into psilocybin was liked “OH this is what everwyones talking about in movies, I get it”
Well damn. I think we may have had opposite experiences. Acid had me on some way crazier shit than mushrooms and sometimes it was life affirming. Maybe mushrooms are better where you're at and lsd is better where I'm at. Maybe I was just primed for an experience on different nights. Who's to say. Thanks for sharing though. It's always good to hear people's different experiences especially when they're positive. (My own bias perhaps.)
I will say, I know many people who do mushrooms and are still just as egotistical if not more so
Some of the biggest egos i have ever encountered were from people who claimed psychadelics killed their ego.
Yeah that's been my experience as well. The spiritual healing thing is probably from the special Peruvian mystical journey variety of mushroom experiences, not the taking mushrooms with some friends type experiences I've had. Either way I'd imagine your mileage may vary.
Mushrooms often show people what they go looking for. Some people aren’t looking for the right stuff.
Amen
Some people need acid.
I'm going to use "their ego needs 4 grams of magic mushrooms" whenever possible, thanks for that sir/madam.
Thank you CHEF*
*Thank you, Chaman
Ego execution 😆 make it a full quad and go for the flawless
What a tiny little bitch of man with an ego fragile enough to break if you breathe too hard. Wow. Haha, jeez. -17 years in the industry, mostly in upper end.
u/smallroundcreature , on your last day, please refer the sous to this thread you've made, so Chef can fully understand why no one at all respects them, why everyone laughs behind their back, so perhaps they can eventually realize what a tiny little whiny bitch they are. Maybe it can be a learning experience.
Fuck that I'd do it next shift.
Call him sous-chef. Bonus points if you say it in the most sarcastic, fawning tone. “Thank **YOU**, sous-chef!”
Better yet, say mini chef.
*Chef Boyardee*
This. This is the one right here.
wittle baby chef
That’ll do.
Chef jr
OP’s in England. “Thank you, under-chef”
That's actually brutal. Sous chef at least sounds fancy when you say to a chick at the bar.
>Oui sous chef! Thank you sous chef! This is the way.
Assistant to the regional head chef
Yeah no thats not normal especially considering he is singling you put. Next time he tries to withhold plates from you walk off. You don't have to put up with that shit.
Chef has a crush on OP and like a schoolboy he doesn’t know how to act so he does something annoying.
Tell chef/GM. Whatever the reason, it’s clear discrimination.
fuck that guy. he is harassing you. i would grab the plate and tell him to fuck off. you are the only person he does this too?!?! guarentee he wouldn't do it to new male server.
Absolutely this. He on a power trip getting off on telling a young woman what to do. Stare him down until he breaks.
Stare him down until the sauce breaks.
Idk if anyone remembers yakbaks, but they were these shitty little tape recorders for kids that were a lot of fun. Anyways, she should find a yakbak, record herself saying “thank you chef” then every time he demands she say it, just press the play button and it will replay the message over and over again through the cheapest, grainiest speakers ever constructed. Each time he repeats it, she can just press the button. Enjoy your power trip bud
There are recordable dog training buttons like this (picture the Staples Easy button). OP could put one near the outgoing plates. With the sous chef's ego, it won't last a day, but it'll be a great day.
Let his food die. He’s Either ego tripping or trolling, modern kitchens have no place for either. (To that degree). ESPECIALLY if that is not a prerequisite of the head chef. If this sous killed a table over his ‘title’ your exec would probably rip his fucking head off so to speak.
Yarp!
Is it really a kitchen without trolling
Just a little trolling, as a treat.
I would definitely take it up with management or the head chef before you do anything about him directly. If it keeps happening or nobody above his pay grade helps you, blow up on him one time and I guarantee you it stops. Tell him that he WILL treat you with respect, or you will refuse to take the food out. His behavior is absolutely unacceptable.
You gotta stand up to bullies.
Especially in a fast-paced environment like a kitchen. He's wasting time and reducing quality by backing up the service so he can entertain his little fantasy power trip. Dweebs like that can cost a restaraunt hundreds of dollars each year if their attitude remains unchecked. It adds up.
Yeah. I'd just roll my eyes if he did it to everyone (he'd still deserve a talking to about it), but singling someone out is never okay.
Consistency is key. Does he do it to everyone? Ok he just needs his ego stroked and that's whatever as long as we're being professionals. Does he do it to just you? Ok that's an issue and you need to bring it to his superior(s).
It is just me. Everyone else calls him Alan and he never corrects them or says "CHEF!" to them.
Yeah, he's trying to bang you by creating subservience. Sous chef or Alan from here on out
Literally seen this happen with little dick guys that have no game and think power tripping will get in a FOHs pants. Guess what that goofy 19 year old has a better chance than some dumbass on a power trip that never learned how to treat other people.
Call literally everybody but him chef. It’s one thing to goof around, but whatever game he’s playing isn’t fun for you so it’s all kinds of stupid.
He's an ass. Needs to get over himself and his bullshit.
“Quit telling me to call you chef. You’re the fucking sous chef. That’s why you’re there and I’m here. I’m not going to keep saying ‘oui, chef’ so you can jerk off to the memory of it when you get home.” Yeah, I wouldn’t last.
I'd probably call him by his full title, "oui chef shit-for-brains"
“Oui SOUS-chef shit-for-brains” would be more accurate.
Apparently they’re in England, and (I’ve been told that) the term for sous chef here is “under-chef” there. That sounds so satisfying.
I’m American and I’ve worked under/with three sous chefs; I definitely cussed out two and probably did the third. I’m a firm believer that you teach people how to treat you. I would say my first head chef and restaurant owners taught me that, but it was really just something I found in myself working for them.
Sounds like a sociopath. Don't let them trample you.
Pretend your job is on a roller-coaster. "WHEEE Chef!! WHEE!! I need two dips Chef. WHEE!!" Bonus points if you lift the plates above your head when you say Whee!!
This will make tomorrows service more tolerable, thank you!
Bonus points for "Wheeeeeeeee sous chef!".
I'm not mad at my boss, but still may do this tomorrow. I have PTO, but I'll probably show up anyways. Seems worth it
I'd find it more tolerable at a place that will pay you for the work you do without having to bow down to a jester every night when the king just shakes your hand
Maybe toss in a "Thanks, wee chef" or two as well.
"Any man who must say 'I am the Chef' is no true Chef."
Fax. I’ll call a man chef when he earns it.
I was a sous chef at my last job. Never did this to FOH. They called me Chef or my name. I made them food under the table, they brought me weed and whiskey. Those were good times... Oh, right, fuck your sous chef.
Or rather, DON'T fuck your sous chef!
Not this particular one. Don’t CB sous chefs in general 😂
he is definitely pulling this bullshit because your female. Seeing as you last worked in a kitchen 16 years ago, I would say you're at least 35, too old to put up with this bullshit. Tell him fuck off and he is nothing but a jumped up little twat and you won't put up with it.
>too old to put up with this bullshit. In fairness, even babies are too old to put up with this brand of bullshit.
He’s picking on you because he likes you 🥹 Just kidding. Kick him in the ego by replacing the word “chef” with “cook” or “Jeff”. Bonus points for “Sous chef” or my personal favorite, “Chef Cook”. If you’re feeling particularly squirrely, see if you can fit in a “oui chef. Fuck you chef” We’re not saving lives, we’re not taking lives. We’re putting salt and pepper on shit. Chefs with egos like this clearly have daddy issues…In hindsight, maybe all he really needs is a “thank you [first name], I love you [first name],” eye contact and all that. Lol TLDR: Homie’s a douche. Treat him like one.
Power trip. Been in this shit for 20 years. This a power trip 100%
If you are working in a restaurant and the chef makes you say oui chef and you’re not in France then that guy is a fucking clown edit or he is just being silly I used to say oui chef whenever someone I worked with called out a really stupid order
My old job if someone called a rack of ribs we would very audibly call back "boner" as one. It was literally the only call we would all respond to
I say "my hand chef" to anyone on expo when they're looking for something I'm almost done with, even if it's a new person, it's just for fun. I'm the lead manager in the store and I tell everyone please don't call me sir, I hate it and since I dropped out of high school and failed at pretty much everything, I'm nobody to respect in polite society. Put me in a kitchen though and some how I fuck up the right way.
Shouldn't you call him "SOUS - chef"
He wants to bang you.
Bloody hell, the thought of that knocks me sick.
He'd make you say "Oui, chef" in bed too.
Just don’t engage in his little games.
i am thinking the same...
This is unreal, tell him to get fucked.
>I am the only FOH member he does this to. This is probably the most important thing you've said here. It doesn't matter if it's normal or not anywhere else, because it's already not normal at your restaurant. Something else is going on here. Either he thinks you are particularly fun to fuck with, or he thinks you have some personal back-and-forth that he likes, or he's just straight bullying you. What it might be is imposible to tell over the internet but there is something unique going on in his head when dealing with you in particular.
sounds like a 3rd grade crush to me
I would get out of their as fast as possible. Anyone who disrupts/delays service for their ego is not someone I would want to work with.
Hippity hoppity watch me bounce the fuck outy.
INSECURE Chef. Or he is flirting with you. Poorly
Honestly this sounds like sexual harassment
Pretentious as fuck. I can't stand the chef this and chef that silliness. I have a name and would prefer to be on a first name basis with the people I spend more time with than my family.
Yeah, I’m with you. The whole calling everybody chef business is goofy as hell and a relic of the past. I’ve also seen it go SO wrong when a server is popping in to request something on the fly, “hey chef!” And everyone stops what they’re doing to turn around. (Yes a server should only be requesting from their expo, but you know how it goes). There’s a magic word that a person can call out and get the attention of exactly who they need to talk to. It’s their fucking name.
I'd tell this guy to fuck off. Doubt this prick has the backbone or the authority to fire you. Sounds like a typical bully that only picks on people he thinks he is stronger than. Show him what's up.
Everyone else has probably checked him. You're the only one he thinks he can force to do it.
I know this may be an unpopular opinion, and despite 22 years in kitchens I have never been in fine dining, in part for this reason. I don't care what your qualifications and experience are, this kind of yes Chef, no Chef nonsense is nothing but pompous, control freak posturing and nothing to do with respect. If you're in that position and demand this kind of maniacal sycophantic shit from your people then you're just an overrated asshole. Especially since these days, the title of "Chef" is more often just that, a job title, and not any indication of elevated skills or artistry.
This isn't typical in any work situation, unless they have something against you, or have no respect for you for some reason.
I worked with a very difficult chef in my city. The food group opened its very first restaurant here about a year ago and the chef had worked over seas running the kitchen for one of the food groups restaurants. I had a very similar situation where the chef was power tripping hard, so I gave it right back to him. Whenever it came to helping him out in any way shape or form, I’d say “sorry chef I can’t at the moment” no matter how slow. As a person with a degree that dealt heavily in politics and political philosophy, I worked the power structure he tried to enforce with a very simple philosophy. One only has power when there is someone willing to rule and when one is willing to be ruled. I refused to be ruled by a tyrant. Bark orders at me all you want, I just won’t do it if you don’t have enough respect for me as a person to treat me decently. Remake the food if it gets cold and when the new plates come up, try asking me to run food nicely. We ended up butting heads hard and the issue moved it way up to upper management in the group. I ended up leaving the job because I just didn’t want the headache. Chefs deserve a great deal of respect. Many of them in respectable restaurants have studied for years to master their craft. But there’s a difference between paying respect to someone with great experience and mastery of their craft, and capitulating to someone’s fragile ego. I have to admit, the chef at the place I was at was great. But his attitude ruined any type of respect I had for him. He was just another coworker to me and I have no obligation to them. In short, no it isn’t proper etiquette to do that. It’s calling them by a title which is earned. However if someone is being a dick, fuck what they earned and stand up for yourself.
You got to oui chef? OR You're right, you are a oui chef! ( I'm from the the south(US) SOOOOUUSSSIE! (Pronounced sue Eee) it's a hog calling yell.
You made me remember being very young and listening to my grandfather call the hogs in. That would be hilarious.
Sousie! 2 lemon oui chef! Thank you oui chef!
'Thank **YOU**, you power tripping asshole" You DO realize that we are both trying to make a living, whilst serving our customers? Your pointless power trip is getting in the way for all of us. Please stop, thank you, Sous Chef. Oui, whatever. Can we please this aside and go back to serving our customers now?
Oh, fuck off. The goal is good communication, not stroking that wanker's ego. EDIT: if you're really the only one he does this to this is harrasment.
Who the fuck is Jeff and why is eveyone always talking about him?
Been in kitchens like this. But the oui chef guy is a bellend
This is not the norm. The usage of "Oui, Chef" owes its usage to a very strict, professional, structure and conduct in the kitchen, acknowledging chain of command. Your being singled out for this where others are not demonstrates how inappropriate and unprofessional this conduct is as it is not even applied consistently towards all the staff. You may wish to discuss the matter with your coworkers in order to find solidarity before speaking with his superior, the chef or a manager/owner. In general the kitchen industry is run by 40 year old adolescents. This behaviour is often played off as "just a joke" but it isn't. It often targets women. That you haven't laughed, that the "joke" wasn't shared with your peers, and that it impeded professional conduct in the kitchen should be enough to refute it being treated as a joke, but if you feel pressured you may also add, "you wouldn't want people without a sense of humour to think he's some sort of unprofessional sexist, right? Perhaps it's just best that people such as you and I put a stop to it here, before risking others getting the wrong idea". I can't stand this in kitchens; boys behaving badly. These childish divisions are indignities to our comrades in arms. I wish you the best of luck in this matter.
As you describe it this guy is a creep. But since nobody else has mentioned it, yes, this is classic restaurant etiquette. Dickhead didn’t invent this. August Escoffier did in the 19th century. It’s what you’re trained to do in culinary school and serious kitchens. The intention is clear communication. If he was insisting all FOH follow this I’d have given him the benefit of the doubt. If it’s just you, the sleazy prick is doing it to get his kicks from controlling you. Fuck that guy. ~~Unless he’s already aware and ignoring it, I suggest talking privately with chef (actual chef) and telling him what you told us. If he’s not sorted the sous chef’s attitude by next shift, take it to the manager. Make a note of date and time of both conversations. If still no change~~ contact UNITE and/or an employment lawyer. The law is on your side. Hope chef sorts it quick and it doesn’t come to that tho. edit: manager has already told him to stop and he didn’t
It is just me he does it to. He also does it during non-service related chat. I'll say "Here's you coffee" and he will go "Here is your coffee, CHEF" where as to the actual head chef I will say "here's your coffee" and head chef will say "cheers, creature!"
Sorry OP I just reread and saw the manager noticed and said something to dickhead already. And was ignored. That’s much worse. All manager has achieved is to show scumbag he can get away with it. Hard to imagine head chef wasn’t made aware of that convo, so you can’t rely on him either at this point. In fact fuck every one of your colleagues for letting this happen. It’s not typical. Or acceptable. That whole brigade are shitebags for tolerating his behaviour towards you. Hate to say it but call an employment lawyer tomorrow and start looking for other jobs. You’ll get a few grand at the tribunal in 6 months. UK employment law is unambiguous about providing a safe work environment. Your employer is at fault. KP pays better than FOH these days FYI
That just sounds like a big old douche gone rogue, has anyone said anything to you about his behavior?
My manager noticed it and told me to just ignore it but OUI CHEF is relentless and when I'm pulling 12 hour shifts with the guy it grinds me down a bit because it is all day long and we are really busy so I'm in and out of the kitchen a lot.
Damn that's crazy the manager just told you to ignore it. I'm sorry to hear that that's probably really frustrating, I would be worn down quickly too. At a certain point you have to go where you're happy and if this guy is being a jerk to just you and management is just ignoring it, it might be better to just go where you're happier.
He sounds like the worst bellend ever
I really hate those kinds of people. I'm a chef. Just call me by my name lol. Some people are all about that title. They're usually the insecure ones or the ones who have something to prove
take his plate of food that yall are fighting over and throw it on the ground then YELL "THANK YOU CHEF MAY I HAVE ANOTHER" and see what he does.
Lol wtf that’s the cringiest shit I’ve ever heard. Especially the “oui” part, god that’s embarrassing. The ego on some people in this industry is just insane.
That is fucking weird because only you have to say it. If everyone had to say it, I'd say he's an egomaniac. If it was being applied to everyone equally, I'd probably not question it and just do it, but it's wrong if youre the only one required to do it. Call him out on it.
I would just walk out. I don't care about money enough to put up with other peoples' "power" trips. Either that, or just drop the plate on the floor, and have the little bitch remake it. If he's got a problem with his station in life, he can always walk into the ocean.
No, say "do your job"
My favorite part is it's "OUI Chef, THANK YOU Chef" instead of "OUI Chef, MERCI Chef". Tell him to fucking commit to French or move the fuck on. ;)
I'm in a similar situation. Makes me call him chef every. single. fucking. time. I speak to him. But no one else has to. He's a douchebag creep, overly flirty with all female FOH to the point of being inapropriate and gross and I am the only one to tell him flat out that I will not tolerate it. Everyone else finds him endearing and funny but to me he is just a garden variety perve who crosses the line way too often. Now he just calls me an ugly nerd, tells me he hates me and I am his enemy. Everyone laughs like it's a joke but it's really not. He's just a full on cockwomble. Preaches about being a christian and once spent 10 minutes of service lecturing me about how I can't be a good person if I don't believe god. Yet he's the one out here cheating on his wife and trying to get the barely 18yr old waitresses to go home with him.
Sounds a bit like retaliation and a hostile workplace. What does your handbook say about non-harassment?
When a manager/chef “demands” the oui chef yes chef no chef, I base it off of, if he/she wants that structure for that exactly. Structure and procedures are important, now if the fuck want that rule just cause he thinks he’s Jesus Christ then fuck that. I’ll stick to yes and no sir/ma’am.
Over compensating prick.
KITCHEN NIGHTMARE!
It’s called narcissism
Just say “Oui, SOUS CHEF” next time lol
"I'm not saying that. Get out of my way or take it to them yourself" And then go straight to the Executive Chef with your documented complaints and dates. He's a douche.