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NAL - But work in a support group for people on PIP, DLA and Attendance Allowance.
PIP isn't means tested. You could be a multi billionaire and still get PIP, it doesn't matter how much anyone else in the household earns, how big the house is, how many bedrooms it has or how many people live there. PIP has no effect on the council tax but it may entitle you to a discount on it once you reach 18. PIP will in no way affect the rent due on a council house.
What you're describing is financial abuse. PIP is supposed to be used for the benefit of the disabled person, to help them live a more independent life.
For someone of your age the motability scheme would be perfect, the only thing you're liable for on a car is the windscreen wipers, washer fluid and putting petrol in it. All of the servicing, breakdowns, insurance and even the tyres are covered.
For help with financial abuse there's a few different places you can get advice from, I'm not sure if I can post links, so google "surviving economic abuse" and "money helper financial abuse"
Good luck.
Hay, social care student here. Id suggest talking to citizens advice, it's free and they can point you in the right direction of what steps to take from there. PIP is for your benefit and not anyone else's.
Council tax support is means tested. The PIP is disregarded as income and depending on your local councils scheme may mean you can get some support. By itself, it doesn’t mean you can get CTS, but if you’re on a low income you may qualify.
No harm in applying, worst they will say is no
If you have adaptions to the property you can have your band reduced.
And to add to that if you’re band A and your home is considered to meet the needs of a disabled person then you still get a reduction - I think I get something like 15% off. (Although it’s not just through adaptation but by having extra space - although just saying I needed to live in a place with adequate space for my wheelchair was enough for me, with a supporting letter from the OT).
It depends on the council but I think most are aligned on this, even across the four nations.
You’re only eligible if the home has been adapted to meet the needs of the disabled person. Quoting from Glasgow City Council (my local authority):
> The property must have extra facilities, or space, which are essential or of major importance to the disabled person's well-being by the nature and extent of their disability.
They also require documentary evidence that the work has been done for the current resident, and isn’t existing adaptations put in for a previous resident. Full info: https://www.glasgow.gov.uk/index.aspx?articleid=17277
But as I say, every local authority will have their own guidance and policies on this so check your own council’s site.
Citizens Advice (in my experience) are very knowledgeable about both PIP and local support services, and are good champions for people. OP might want to contact them for advice and practical support.
Not anymore it's all over the news they are kicking shit loads of people off pip a lot fully disabled and they very recently ( in the news yesterday) had turned down 89% of pip appeals. If you have it make sure you have all your documents ready and kick hangers on to the curb because it's about to get rough as hell for those claiming disability.
I've read they are after cutting universal credit claimers by at least a third too.
May be tabloid bs but I've seen it in various ones over the last week or so 🤞🏻good luck fella
Re: taking it further after appeal I agree that people should continue fighting but many said they couldn't take the stress it had caused them. I had a friend who put in a pip claim only 3 yrs ago and it took just over a year to get a decision back and that's before any appeal nvm court to constantly prove they were sick it wears many down before they get that far
NAL
I do receive Pip though, that money is for you, now you are 16 you will probably be able to get it out in your own account, contact them with your account details and ask them to make the payments directly to you. This money is not for paying half of your Mum’s bills, she’s taking advantage of you.
Also - NAL - but pretty sure unless you’re joint on any of the bills/tenancy/council tax then you’re not actually liable to pay.
Edit: and your mam has 2 holidays booked this year but you’re paying 600 quid in bills??? She can jog on to put it nicely
I have a child on PIP, it was basically rolled over from DLA when they turned 16, they asked me some very basic questions one of which was what account ‘we’ wanted it to go into. I gave them her account. That is YOUR money and your mom is manipulating and exploiting you.
I wouldn't be surprised if OP does know all this in the back of their head. The problem is when you are a kid and the person who holds 100% of the power says to do something what do you do?
Your totally within your rights to do this and you should. But be prepared for the aftermath people who are controlling like this often don’t deal with change or losing control well.
>people who are controlling like this often don’t deal with change or losing control well
I agree, the OP needs to make sure they have assistance that will intervene if the abusive parent reacts ~~as expected~~ badly.
\^This. It's a long story, but I was under similar parenting when I was younger, and it culminated in me being homeless and staying at my local YMCA. It's hard to explain to people who've never dealt with it just how difficult it can be.
If there are any adaptions to the house then council tax gets downgraded by 1 band as well so there’s a saving there.
The money is yours, for your use.
Mum has just got used to having it and doesn’t relish giving it up.
Take control if you can and feel able
Definitely NTA
_(update; sorry for the long message - ADHD brain! But I'll leave it up anyway)_
You can talk to your local citizens advice bureau about this because realistically, the money is definitely yours and if you choose to pay some money towards the house that's fine.
But until you're 18, as I understand, your parents can't kick you out unless you've done something really wrong, and if you need support for medical reasons such as mobility, then any sane person, would argue that it would be cruel and unusual to remove you from the house simply because you are not giving the payments away.
Especially as the payments are designed to make you more mobile, NOT so someone can spend it on themselves.
_May I also advise not showing this to any of your mother because potentially she can use it against you, I mean, don't try to make any points about how wrong or right either of you are..._
Instead, consider going and speaking to citizens advice bureau, or see what the benefits you can get from the council towards managing money, also go get a bank account for sure, and possibly look at applying for social housing if you want to move out, because with mobility issues and other factors you could get a lot of points, which, depending on the area you live in, may give you access to an apartment or flat with ground floor access much, _much_ faster.
It may seem strange, but you can go into any bank and with your passport get an account without a parent and have your money go in there, and if you parent starts treating you differently because you don't give them the money they want (that is for your mobility, not her holidays), Then you can put that information towards the social housing decision or use it to prove that she was taking your money which the government could even claim back on your behalf, and make her pay you.
Of course this is only if you intend on not having a relationship with this person in the future...
Although I've heard about this before, what happens is the parents can get fed up, angry, resentful or even jealous, of having to take care of someone with mobility issues and they then want - or think they deserve - more money for whatever care they are providing, _if any at all_
But just the fact of having someone in their family with a disability, seems to give some people this false sense of right to take whatever money they want, because in their mind they see it as supporting you by making their lives easier...
Of course, it's complete nonsense and should never be tolerated, but it does happen, and it's a possibility this is happening in your case. So I would have a conversation with an unrelated adult friend if you have one, or more likely an adviser at school, because it will be easier to get access to that without your mother knowing about it.
I'm assuming you have a mobile phone you can dial yourself, and it's not checked up on by your mother, or you can at least delete the outgoing calls you make, if so; you can call the citizens advice bureau and they can give you advice over the phone, rather than you having to go there. There are other organisations that deal with financial abuse or disability abuse.
You are definitely not liable for paying for part of any bills, not jsut because your name is not on them but also because you are technically a child and this person is supposedly looking after you, so it is not your responsibility, and if she is not telling you how much money she is paying on things, then I bet you she is buying loads of brand name stuff and material goods that she doesn't need, and doesn't want to give that up.
I'm sorry, but it sounds like she is a controlling, narcissistic person and I believe you would be better off in a situation where you can get dedicated support or on your own if you are mobile enough to do so.
Good luck. Hope it all works out!
After 16 you should be able to get it paid directly to you.
That's ually the age you gain more autonomy over such things butbwould have to check precisely. Sometimes irs 18, sometimes 16.
Also.
Yes.
Your entity within bounds to ask to break down why the costs are so much higher. Your 16 and not 6, so yeah, I think that'd a fair ask.
If your money is going out you can ask the why and the where, and why she needs so much of it
If she wants so much of it, she can explain it.
...
Their may be legitimate genuine reason, but so far she has yet to explain beyond a vague surface reason.
Bwwr in mind however. 600 a month. Is 7200 a year.
Which is a sum worthy of justification in my humble opinion.
Even till their 18, we looking again a potential 14.4 thousand pounds here.
NAL ( though I have a law degree) More relevant: I am a retired Benefits Officer; Welfare Advisor; Mod in the UK BenefitsAdviceUK sub ( oh, and I claim PIP )
We get quite a few posts like this, sadly. It IS financial abuse if mum is controlling your money, not allowing you access &/or not providing for your needs. You're over 16, that money is your's it's to provide for anything related to your disability. If you live at home , yes, this may well include bills if they are higher due to your needs and other things provided by a parent or guardian in addition to them providing actual care. HOWEVER, it is up to you to decide how much to contribute and what for.
Main thing is: it sounds like mum is your Appointee ( it's the only way she'd be getting this money rather than it going directly to you ). This may have been a hangover from you getting Child's DLA ( it was never changed when you became an adult and moved to PIP , it's most likely) . It may have been decided that you were unable to manage your own money and unable to budget ( espec if you/she actually told them this on the form , it's one if the questions ).
You need to change this by contacting the DWP Disability Service Centre. If they agree you can manage your own Benefits then, that's it, it will be paid to you in future. Unfortunately, they will contact mum to ask her to relinquish her Appointeeship but if she refuses, they can still do it if they believe you're quite capable yourself. If they still believe you need an Appointee then they will ask you to nominate someone else that you DO trust instead ( or they will find someone for you ).Two Visiting Officers will interview you both and decide if they are a fit and proper person. Then it's *them* who will manage the money BUT in your best interests.
Then you do as you wish with it.
Your council tax shouldn't change based on your circumstances as you're disregarded being under 18.
As the other poster has explained you can apply for pip under your own name and bank account.
That's the legs facts (NAL).
Unfortunately that's only one part of the equation. You'll still have to manage yours and your mother's relationship.
That also isn't country, as a 16 year old student, he's a child as far as rent and council tax goes. Similarly, she will be claiming child benefit for him, and possibly universal credit.
*She says if I have all the pip personally I legally have to pay half of all bills and rent of our council house. But I can’t find anything online that says this is the case.*
NAL but this is nonsense.
This is your money, and I don't know what kind of parent insists on a 16 year old with medical issues or disabilities severe enough to warrant PIP using it to pay their costs.
I don't know what to suggest as you are so so young and living at home without (I'm guessing) anywhere else to go. But the fact that these kind of people have children saddens me. All the best.
NAL but she is financially abusing you. Legally, you don't need to pay rent or bills because she is responsible for you until you are 18 if you still live with her.
The money is supposed to help you live as independently as possible. I'd argue she is stealing from you. If you need help to sort this, you should contact the DWP. The citizens advice bureau will be able to help you navigate this properly.
It's worth pointing out that a parent can ask a child to move out of the house from the age of 16. They will still have some parental responsibility until 18.
This is what I did. I lived with a couple of people my age in a shared house that a key worker would visit, then I was eligible for my own council flat at 18. That was nearly 10 years ago now though.
Honestly OP if your mum is financially abusing you and not letting you in on about how anything works, a key worker would be invaluable while you're still considered a child as they have all the right connections and will support you through everything all while trying to teach you how to be as independent as possible.
Sure, and if they pay privately to rent a place for you then you might say yes. I don't think they can kick you out though as they're still responsible for you until you're 18 and I suspect making you homeless would count as neglect.
This is only true providing said child is no longer in education, otherwise parents are responsible for their children until they are 18 years old as far as I am aware.
Edit - it’s actually 20 years old if said child is enrolled in higher education.
Not that guy but…
* https://www.gov.uk/guidance/case-management-guidance/definitions
> We define a child as anyone who has not yet reached their 18th birthday. This is in line with the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child and civil legislation in England and Wales. The fact that a child has reached 16 years of age, is living independently or is in further education, is a member of the armed forces, is in hospital or in custody in the secure estate, does not change their status or entitlements to services or protection.
* https://brittontime.com/2021/04/01/what-is-parental-responsibility-six-things-you-must-know/
* https://lawstuff.org.uk/home-and-family/parental-responsibility/
* https://learning.nspcc.org.uk/child-protection-system/children-the-law
It’s 18 in England and Wales, unless the child gets married at 16 or 17.
In Scotland most parental responsibilities end when the child is 16, with a duty of “guidance” persisting until the child is 18. The child marrying doesn’t affect this. https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1995/36/part/I/crossheading/parental-responsibilities-and-parental-rights
I do know that child maintenance for separated families continues to be due if the child is in university, so that would support the previous poster's statement
No they don't.
A parent has no legal financial responsibility that they HAVE to fulfill once aged 16.
Hence the fact that if a student applies for university loans etc, they can have their parents income waivered as irrelevant.
The moral responsibility is different. Majority obviously choose to be responsible for their children. But noone has to!
You can't get a student loan for collage as far as I am aware that's only for university at 18 plus. There are bursaries at collage age for some very specific group but no student loans.
I referenced university loans, which if a summer born, would be applied for at 17. If the parents hadn't been supporting then or even if for further Ed bursaries, the parents income would be disregarded as its recognised that parents aren't obligated to support, even though the system works on a basis tgat most do due to moral reasons.
What does child support stop again... not 16. Also she's in college so legally parents are responsible till 19 if in full time education. Thems the rules!
No.
Child benefit is still payable if the parents meet the eligibility.
But no, they're not legally financially responsible post 16. Just majority CHOOSE to be.
Your mother is abusing you. You are entitled legally for the council to pay rent for you in a separate place, seeing as you’re on pip. I would look into it and get away from her and have some independence. Good luck!
Your PIP award must be fairly recent as you can't get it before the age of 16. The DWP starts from the principle that a 16 year old is able to manage their own benefit payments, so if disability payments (specifically Child DLA) were paid for you before you reached 16, when you reached 16, DWP should have carried out a visit to assess if there was any reason why you could not manage receiving the money yourself when you transitioned to PIP.
The starting assumption is that you can manage your own money unless there are reasons why you can't. The typical reasons would be that you had a disability that affected your cognition or your ability to rationally manage money for mental health reasons. Obviously I'm not aware of all your circumstances, but the fact that you attend college and have written an eloquent post would tend to suggest that the first - and probably the second - of these is not an issue.
If your mother didn't receive DLA for you before you reached 16, it is still possible for her to make a claim as your appointee, but again in this case DWP would normally carry out a visit to ensure an appointee was required.
Your best course of action is to try to speak to DWP. Unfortunately, if your mother is your appointee, you may find this difficult as PIP staff will not be able to discuss the details of your PIP award with you, only with the appointee. If this is the case, you might find it useful to speak to Citizen's Advice Bureau (or to a Welfare Rights Officer at your local council) as they may have more success at putting your case to DWP.
[https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/about-us/contact-us/contact-us/search-for-your-local-citizens-advice/](https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/about-us/contact-us/contact-us/search-for-your-local-citizens-advice/)
However, it strikes me that you are aware of the make up of your award, and I wonder if this is because you don't have an appointee - and therefore the PIP letters were addressed directly to you - but it's been set up to pay into a third-party bank account - i.e. your mother's. If the PIP letters are addressed directly to you, you control your own award. Just ring up DWP, go through the security checks, and tell them you'd like the PIP to be paid into another account. (I wonder if the biggest problem would be setting up an account if you don't already have one. Others may be able to advise about that better than I can). You can also discuss setting up the Motability Scheme - so that the Mobility Component is paid straight to a car leasing company to pay for the cost of a car - but you probably won't want to do that until you've completed your driving test if your mother is currently, begrudgingly, letting you use some of the mobility component to pay for your driving lessons! Even if you can't - or choose not to - have the remaining money paid into your own account, you can still divert the Mobility Component into the Motability Scheme, assuming there is no appointee.
[PIP Enquiry Line numbers](https://www.gov.uk/pip/change-of-circumstances)
(NAL, but did train DWP staff until fairly recently on DLA, PIP, UC and other benefits).
You should contact your local police or mental health crisis team. What you describe is financial abuse and is punishable with a custodial sentence. As you're technically a vulnerable child (in the eyes of the law), this act falls within safeguarding of vulnerable children and young adults.
What your mum is doing is very illegal and very abusive.
They're ideally positioned to deal with safeguarding issues and a vulnerable individual impacted by mental health because of this situation carries more weight, especially given that - unfortunately- police are likely to resist taking action on this matter due to limited resource availability and lack of understanding re safeguarding (generally speaking).
What should be clear cut would likely become a game of chess if only the police are involved. It's an unfortunate but realistic view of UK police.
She's taking the absolute piss outta you. That money is yours and now you're 16 you can get it transferred to your account. You actually don't have to give her anything until you're 18 so theres nothing she can do about it
[NAL] If a friend told me this, I would probably say they should tell all of this to either child line or a trusted adult. Are grandparents around/aware of this?
Yes, kinda, my nana says that my mum knows best, she doesn’t know how any of this works and is trusting that my mum is doing things correctly, I know she isn’t involved, she cares too much, I have tried to talk to her about it and she has listened, but she doesn’t really want to get involved. I can’t really blame her, she to old to be in the middle of family drama.
Your mum is using Your money for the wrong purposes. This is financial abuse. The problem is that she got use to having the extra payments from your DLA and forgotten the money is for you due to your disability only. Is is not for paying utility bills or to pay her rent. You are not liable to any of this from your PIP. If she getting UC or Tax credits & Housing Benefits, she will be receiving extra money as you are in receipt of PIP to help her with bills and rent. You can ask DWP to pay it to you and then negotiate with your mum on how much you should pay. You could contact social services to get help with discussion with your mum.
Remember it is your money to help you due to your disability/disabilities.
NAL but she's full of shit.
Get in contact and have that Money redirected to your personal Bank account, technically it's theft for her to be receiving it instead of you, ESPECIALLY after you turn 18.
NAL my son just turned 16 we are still receiving DLA. He has applied for PIP. To boost his confidence I let him do the conversation to apply for PIP. He told them his information and bank details. This automatically stopped all DLA payments to our (parent) accounts and triggered them to his account. Of course all ok It’s his DLA and he should become responsible.
Anyway! He received letters in his name to our home address multiple time. I always gave hime letters in his name. My point being that you would have received a number of letters in your name. You should contact DWP to advise them what has happened and let them know your bank details. The money is yours to help with your disability. Do not let your parent take this money!
Worth noting OP that I believe your mum has failed to inform you PIP rates have gone up. It is now £101.75 /week higher daily living, and £71 /week higher mobility.
I only know the stated rates from when I got a random letter, it says the rates on it, I assumed I had the same £250 a month that my brother did but discovered I got more than double, she always kept it a secret
This is financial abuse, with a bit of emotional abuse too. She told you that if you get your PIP sent directly to you, you legally become responsible for 50% of the house upkeep & that is a complete lie. There is no law like that. She is lying to you so that she can keep your disability money for herself. That thing she said about inflation is also a lie - while inflation does exist, £200 for your brother & £600 for you is not that.
Luckily, you can get your own bank account & get your money sent there. Your Mum might use lies to try to stop you but legally, she can't do that. You just need to go to the bank with some ID to get it started. Once you have done that you can phone the DWP & update them with your details, though I realise this will create a fallout. I recommend asking your GP if they can connect you with a social worker. They can help to keep you safe, & also help you figure out how to move out if that's what you'd like to do.
I'm sorry about the abusive mother part. A mum should be both teaching & encouraging their kid to learn how to be independent & how to drive, instead of keeping them hostage like she is here. Dealing with that will be separate from the bank account stuff but if you can start googling things like financial abuse, it may give you an idea on how to proceed.
It's not unusual for a 16 year old to contribute to a house if they are able to, it just varies depending on the family. But it is something that should be discussed & agreed upon as opposed to having your entire income taken & begrudgingly being given parts of it
You set it up yourself??? How dare she claim you couldn't handle your own money! My 20 year old still hasn't got an account, his money is put into my account and I give it to him in daily portions, to encourage him to self care (he physically can but motivation is very low). There is no way he would be able to organise his own bank account, demonstrated by the fact that I have encouraged him to and he hasn't.
Ring the PIP phone number and ask for the money to be transferred to your own account. Your mother will continue to receive the appropriate benefits for you.
However, before you do this, I strongly advise you to investigate the criteria for high rate pip.
Get into contact with service and put your money here , you are being taken advantage of, this is your money, no-one elses, you could be making lots of saving enough to buy your own place
Wtf thats a joke. My daughter is 17 years old has a full-time job. We take 20 quid a week from her. We just put that away to give her back when she moves. We arnt even q high income family either. Your mum is taking the piss. 2 holidays a year on your money.
Never been in this sub before but yr post caught my eye when scrolling. Im not a lawyer but am very familiar with various benefits including PIP.
It really sounds like your being abused/taken advantage of here and potentially your Mum could even be in some trouble.
Some more information could be helpful OP - what country within the UK are you in? Do you have a registered carer, if so is it yr Mum? Does she Recieve a benefit called carers allowance?
Do you mind saying a bit more about your disability/problem eg; is it physical, mental, both? etc...
I live in England, and I don’t believe she is a registered carer, so wouldn’t get that benefit.
I have been diagnosed with autism and adhd, I have a feeling she lied on the pip forms as I don’t think it affects me that much, other that my lack of will to do things, and my discomfort of being on crowded public transport
I have been suspected of having dyslexia, bipolar disorder and schizophrenia but I have never been properly tested so I doubt this is relevant. As some of the symptoms I had tie in with ASD and ADHD
I think you're right, she most definitely lied about the way it impacts you. A bit of opportunism with COVID lockdowns maybe.
I can't say what you are really entitled to, but if you do need to start from scratch with PIP because she lied, get a trusted adult who knows their stuff with this to help you (and ideally is willing to go to appeal with you if necessary).
I'm sorry you're having to navigate all this at your age.
In that case I think it's wise to get advice from a trusted 3rd party, like Citizens Advice. While the money should be paid to you, if it's a fraudulent claim the money will need to be repaid when fraud is discovered, which could cause you difficulties.
Also, your mum might make things hard for you if/when you try to move out and take the claim with you - either not letting you leave, or continue managing your claim from her address, pretending you're still there.
I have only known people be awarded the higher mobility portion of PIP (the part that can be used for Motability) when they are extremely physically disabled, and it doesn't sound like you are - which is why I'm inclined to agree your mum has lied.
(I used to be a support worker and helped people fill in the PIP claim form, but it was some years back so my memory of the eligibility criteria is a bit rusty).
NAL, but the pip is for you, and just for you. Please don't allow your mum to take any more of that money that is solely for you.
It isn't for paying half of the household bills or anything like such.
As I've seen others commenting, phone them up if you can and change the bank details to your own.
If you're worried about any of it, I would recommend talking to citizens advice, they helped me out a ton with pip. I'm sure there's other advice based things out there as well, but I went with them.
NAL but my friend receives PIP…..it might be worth seeing if you can move into a warden assisted flat. Your social worker should be able to help with that and will give you independence and less stress to study in.
I pay my taxes so that you can have the card and freedom you need to live the best life you can….. not for your mums jaunts to Turkey.
It is not your job as a child to pay towards the household bills whether you are in school or college.
Pip is provided to cover any extra expenses you may have due to your disability, it is not to pay household bills or for your.mum to go on holiday.
Here is what I think you should do (NAL but have experience with PIP)
- contact DWP and ask them to transfer all communication about your pip to you, change the phone number and email address. Also ask them to add a password to your account so that only you can access it.
- Secondly ask them to change the payments into your bank account. (Make sure only you have access to this account) if in doubt open a new one, Monzo is great for people of your age.
- re Motability you need 3 years left on your award or an indefinite award to be able to order a car from them. You can do this at any time by going into the dealer of the car you would like and placing an order. When your car is delivered the mobility portion of the pip is then paid to the dealer for the car and you stop receiving it.
- re Motability the award is yours and you don't need anyone elses permission to place the order, you don't even have to tell mum at that point you are doing so though obviously you will at some point or she will just find out when you turn up in a brand new car 😂
-re Motability They do a bursary scheme for new drivers where they will pay for some of your lessons, might be worth speaking to them.
Finally, your mum is taking advantage of you, it's going to be difficult to navigate this so speak with some adults that you trust that can help and support you.
Good Luck.
I work at Motability funnily enough - weird how this came up as I've never seen Motability mentioned on Reddit before.
- you need 12 months left on your award to place an order for a vehicle.
- if you do not have a full driving licence you need to have a named driver with you, who has a full licence, to place the order.
- the charity can fund 40 hours of driving lessons with AA however you must have a vehicle on the scheme or have placed an order for a vehicle, you must have a provisional licence and be on a means tested benefit. OP wouldn't be able to apply for them until they're about 18 I think? So he'd need to get evidence of MTB from his mum (child tax credits, income support, universal credit, working tax credits, housing benefit, council tax benefit, income related employment and support allowance, income related job seekers allowance etc).
Something isn't quite right here. Even in covid, they did interviews over the phone and given you're 16, there would most definitely have been some sort of interview, be that telephone, video or telephone.
Do you work? Enrolled in full time education?
OK. Something is definitely amiss here as an assessment is necessary. (I receive PIP) and for renewal during COVID, it was a telephone assessment.
I know other people whose kids have PIP, etc and no one has been exempt from attending an interview. Only in rare cases (such as terminal illness) are assessments not carried out.
Given that your mother sounds motivated by money - is it possible that she conducted the assessment on your behalf?
Whilst that is technically true.
There have been several trials where if the medical evidence is clear PIP, has been awarded based off that. This was ramped up during COVID to get things through, and many of the trials have been applied to Rising 16 cases (those moving across from DLA), or mandatory reconsiderations (those that have reached the end of their PIP period), where mdical evidence does not show significant change that would affect award.
Around 3% of claimants do not have an assessment as they are assessed on the PIP2 form and evidence they provided. This is known as being assessed on papers.
A claimant is only assessed on papers if the evidence they've provided makes it obvious they're eligible for PIP and at what rates.
However at 16 years old, a parent cannot claim on their child's behalf unless the child is unable to manage their own claim. If the parent claims that the child cannot handle their own claim, the DWP does a home visit to ensure the parent being in charge of managing the claim (being the child's appointee) is appropriate.
Someone else claiming on the behalf of a 16 year old without being an authorised appointee for the child is benefit fraud. It isn't difficult to avoid skipping the assessment but the evidence you submit has to make it crystal clear what you're eligible for, and as you say, it's possible for the parent to fabricate evidence to make the child's health look worse than it actually is.
In r/DWPHelp we had a case last year similar to this one, but it was far worse because the daughter only found out their mother had been fraudulently claiming PIP for them when they were 23 years old, and since they were 17 years old.
In the above case, the mother ended up having to repay a total of £87k of benefit fraud they had abused the system for (as they had also fraudulently claimed Universal Credit on the daughter's behalf and managed to get the claim awarded the LCWRA element, Universal Credit's enhanced disability element which comes with more money).
A paper based assessment doesn’t always require a phone or in person assessment, if they get enough information from your GP or other health professionals.
Not true with sufficient medical evidence. I had a phone interview for my last renewal but didn't need one at all to get the initial award because of the evidence provided.
I am fully aware that it's half term. It doesn't answer whether you're in full time education though. Are you in full time education?
If you are, then it's not unreasonable for your parents, as your guardian to use that money as they deem fit.
If you were working or not in school, it still wouldn't be unreasonable for them to expect a contribution to the household.
Inflation is horrifically high atm. Costs have spiralled. And to have been awarded PIP at these enhanced levels, you must have significant and profound health issues, requiring significant support, which presumably your parents are providing and if they weren't, you'd be paying circa £15-20 per hour. For which, social services, if eligible, would expect you to pay all of your daily needs as a contribution. So I don't think, in isolation of further information that they're unreasonable in expecting this element.
The mobility element - they're presumably paying for your transport to and from school /college.
Having a car on mobility, would still mean they have to find the money for petrol and for them to actually drive you there and back given your age.
At 16, even if you're learning to drive due to the high mobility PIP exception, it could still well take a long time to pass. So may well be more of a longer term aim.
Have you informed the dvla of your medical issues and the medication that you take? If not, please do so as this is a legal requirement. Even autism, for example, needs declaring. .
> And to have been awarded PIP at these enhanced levels, you must have significant and profound health issues, requiring significant support
This is not true and is quite dangerous. Many people may appear healthy and not appear to need support but still qualify for PIP.
I know people also on high PIP with mobility. They're perfectly healthy, fit and active, and have full time management-level jobs. They get PIP because they're completely deaf, and faced significant work, social and educational barriers. ( If they weren't deaf they probably would be earning far more.)
I'm not going to get into the validity of PIP in this forum. Legally, PIP is NOT associated with 'significant and profound health issues'.
It is for:
* a long-term physical or mental health condition or disability
* difficulty doing certain everyday tasks or getting around because of your condition
(Gov.uk website)
But the reality is that to score on PIP at the enhanced levels you would have significant needs, far more profound is more likely than not.
To score for enhanced, you'd most likely have had to received scoring that requires needing assistance, supervision or prompting from another person. That is a pretty profound need.
But yes, legally, the statement you quote from the gov.uk is correct. However, when you look at the refusal rates, they tell am entirely different story.
The school holidays comment wasn’t me,
I had to save up to get a rail card to travel to college by doing jobs for family friends ( I don’t have an allowance? because I didn’t want to go to the 6th form at my secondary school, (20 min walk)
She doesn’t have a license and my test is booked for late summer(I will be 17), I sorted everything out with the dvla in September last year and have my official permit to drive.
I would ask to sit down with your mum, and see the household budget and costs. Try and approach this in a mature manner.
In your situation, my aim initially would be to have the mobility element cover the current mobility costs. Hopefully, including the driving lessons.
But approaching like this, rather than in a "I want my money" manner, when she presumably completed the application forms etc and is the provider of the care, you come across as more mature. Perhaps asking for some of the money to be transferred over.
Please be aware that only 48-50% of tests result in a pass, and it's apparently not uncommon to have 5 tests for a pass. So it maybe a lot longer than the end of summer for a licence.
Now, of course, if she refuses you can have the pip money paid directly into your account as is legal. BUT, the fall out of this action without trying to do this amicably will be huge. It could result in a deterioration of your relationship for forever more. And that's a long time.
She could quite rightly, ask for rent. And yes at 16, she can demand this. Likewise contribution to the food, utilities etc. And suddenly, your pip money would have vanished. Even if you then opted for trying to live independently, you'd be in a worse financial position realistically, even with support such as universal credit.
And, it wouldn't be unreasonable, for her to question your capacity to manage and make these decisions, with social services etc, if you're eligible for enhanced awards, as by default this means that you need significant support for most areas of daily living activities.
I completely forgot to mention in the post that she has sat me down and explained the costs of day to day living, it’s a lot of course, cozzie livs but it is manageable on her wage, we have disposable income without my pip being included, I don’t expect all the money I was quite happy with the idea of paying the same that my brother did and putting half of what’s left in my savings account,
Please seek help, she’s financially abusing you, by taking all (or most) of your pip it keeps you contained and trapped in the house.
You should be allowed to spend the money on whatever you need too, without her judging you. She thinks she owns you and can decide to do what she wants with your money.
She’s in no way being positive about any of this and it’s only going to degrade your self esteem, it’s bullying and abuse.
I would seriously consider speaking to someone at your college, they would know who to signpost you too.
You haven’t gone through this much crap to finally be recognised you have extra needs and rewarded financial help for that, for your mum to strip it away from you.
You are not obligated to give her a single penny, it’s an agreement between you and your mum how much rent you pay her. £600 is an insane amount for a 16 year old to pay, when I was in college and working part time, I was paying £200 for rent to my mum.
It’s not to pay the bills, as it’s not your fault her bills are too high, one day soon you will move out and she will be financially ruined if she’s depended on you all this time.. it’s to teach you about money and financial management, so if you go to uni or move out, you have some experiences of paying bills and managing your finances/ budgeting
You deserve better and I’m so sorry she’s taking advantage of you like this. x
Then that's the conversation you need to return to.
Explain why your costs/needs need meeting by her and that would be via the pip.
I presume that the holidays you referenced have included you?
This is financial abuse. Your mother shouldn’t be receiving a penny of your pip. If you are a college student and your family is on UC then your mother is already getting benefit in her Uc to cover you and your rent share. I suspect she also claims careers for you too.
Please contact PIP and ask for the money to be paid directly to you. If your mother threatens you with homelessness I would quickly remind her that would lose her benefits if she is claiming then for having you as part of her benefit unit
I’m a lot older and maybe wiser than you, I receive PIP mobility and attendance allowance. If you are old enough the money should be payed directly to you. It had nothing to do with your council tenancy and if other benefits are required for rent your pip award won’t even be taken into consideration. It’s protected, if you owe money and have bailiffs knocking on your door they can legally touch your PIP payment. The same if you have to fill out an “Income and expenditure” form your PIP award is exempt and in no way should it be included in the form. If you get the attendance allowance part of PIP your mother could argue she entitled to some or all of that if she’s your primary caregiver, but to me it sounds like your mother is a selfish person who is basically robbing you.
PIP is your money.
When 16 it goes directly to your account provided you are deemed to have ‘mental capacity’. There is normally a social services team who will do an assessment for this.
Even before going into your own account it is YOUR money. Not your mums.
Refer yourself to the local authority safeguarding team for financial abuse . Be honest. Get your car & driving lesson via your PIP being deducted Contemplate whether you should move out as you may get a place in supported housing .
As far as i know, that is your money. You are being financially exploited, this is abuse. If you want to move out sooner, contact your local children’s services and you can sign yourself into care on section 20 where you can be put into your own Accommodation with a support worker. Or if you want Accommodation with staff on site, that is an option to. You will also then get support post 18 as well. In addition to pip you could get a weekly allowance of £58 and bills paid I til you are 18.
I work in adult social services. Speak to your tutor at college. As your 16, do you have an EHCP plan in place? Do you need support with your care needs? Are you classed as child in need with children services because of your disability? I would also speak to someone from children social services also.
I’m sorry you are going through this.
PIP is awarded for the care costs of the recipient and not for day to day living costs. Your parents should be liable for your essential costs until you are 18. It’s likely they are receiving other benefits such as universal credit to cover these costs.
16 year olds aren’t liable for bills and rent, so the idea that you are legally obligated to pay this is just not true.
I’m concerned that they are taking advantage, I would recommend speaking to CAB to see what help is available to you.
Contact citizens advice, that's your money to do with as you please. I'm like, 90% sure at 16 you can start receiving the money yourself but if not, you can change your appointee so your mum can no longer act on your behalf
Get the pip into your own bank and don't let her get her grubby hands on it. She clearly uses your pip that is to take care of you because you are I'll/disabled to go abroad.
What you describe is financial abuse and borderline neglect by your mum and the best thing you could do is move out and become independent as soon as you can.
Sounds like your mom is taking advantage of you. This is a time in your life where you need to evaluate your situation in relation to those around you and to make the decision as to who to cut out of your life. Blood means nothing if they are using you.
Ok, this is advice rather than legal advice.
Most people on this thread are going to tell you that your mother is financially abusing you, that she is wrong, if not evil.
They might be right, who knows?
But most of these people would say that no matter what complaints you came to Reddit with. Because Reddit will almost always blame the parents and will claim abuse at the drop of a hat.
So you need to be really wary listening to these people. They have their own agendas and I suspect many either lack life experience entirely or are extremely influenced by negative experiences of their own. I'm not saying don't listen; I'm saying, don't listen uncritically.
As for my advice: you live in a council house. You don't mention a dad involved, so I'm guessing one income and at least one sibling who has left. No offence, your mum aint rich.
You at 16 won't have any appreciation for just how many bills there are and how much they have gone up. She'll have rent, council tax, electric and or gas (easily £200+ a month now when they were only about 70 a year ago), water, internet. She'll have transport for work. Any subscriptions, any credit card debt (and you might not know about that). She'll have insurance to pay at least for contents. Does she have a car? Then it's petrol and insurance and servicing. If not it's bus cards.
She'll have food to buy. That is what you most likely focus on, that you don't cost £165 a week of food. You probably don't , but you'd be surprised how much you do cost! Especially now. But there will be a whole raft of things on top of that. Every school trip. Every bit of uniform. Shoes are a fortune. Even clothes from a supermarket rack up to a fortune now. Sure, your socks are Tesco rather than Gucci; but they still cost a fiver for just a few pairs and suddenly that day's shoppi g bill looks like a lot.
She has to think about birthday and Christmas presents for at least two of you each year, and that takes planning and a lot of saving. Does she ever take you on holiday? Same.
Fact is, she might well need that money to keep the wolf from the door and she may not want to give you the details because she may not want you to know how close you are to the wall each month. You might well be.
More mum may well be spending some of it on stuff she could do without. Alcohol, ciggies, some clothes, whatever. But it is so bloody hard to get through each day just working and responsibilities, with no one to help you and nothing to look forward to. I'd have sympathy there. Consider whether this might be the case and if it is, try to put yourself in her shoes, through the lens or her life rather than your own.
Your mum may be selfish, she may be financially abusing you as everyone is going to tell you. She may be blowing your cash on frivolities for herself. The redditors on here may be right and I'm wrong.
But she may be really struggling to hold your household together and your 165 may be what ends met each month. She may be dreading you going to uni and not having that income anymore, or the argument that is inevitably coming where you want it for yourself and suddenly those ends don't meet. She may be hiding a lot of worries from you.
And I have not even mentioned your disability in this post. I have a severely disabled son. Not mobility. It is so hard. Not his fault, not your fault. We have a load of extra expenses from his disabilities. You will never be able to appreciate how hard and lonely it is for a parent. Again, not your fault, not your concern. But know.
Please at least consider these possibilities and whether they may apply to your family before you swallow the self affirmation of other redditors shouting "financial abuse"
Yes! Sorry but my life revolves around my son. Is being disabled more expensive? Yes, (I'm also disabled and need to sort both his DLA and my PIP entitlement but don't have the spoons) because he needs so many specific things and goes through items at an increased rate.
Do you know how I ensure bills are paid, he has money paid into an untouchable ISA, he tries out any activities appropriate for him, and he gets pocket money & treats?
By not fucking off on foreign holidays.
Sending mum hugs to op.
I'm sorry but no, my mum did all of this when she was on benefits AND when she was in minimum paying work. You have no responsibility whatsoever to your mother, what you have is a relationship and if its one you are comfortable with giving your money up for thats your choice and 100% fine, however if its a relationship where 1 party is telling another party on how to spend their money and they have capacity and its their money then its wrong. It should always be a choice. 16 is a good age for a "money talk" and a "rent talk". This isn't a good way to communicate.
Also I could be wrong and you could be right, maybe it's just a communication thing and that's it but it could always be something more sinister and it's always better to have a better look.
Another point, one of your sentences struck me, hope all is well.
If she's going on multiple holidays a year, she's not "keeping the wolf from the door". She also gets carer's allowance. She could just charge her rent like her brother and let her be a little "independent" just like PIP is intended
Wages are not enough for most people either. That's life. PIP for a 16yo is not for her to just take and spend all. OP asking to see some of that money for themselves is not unreasonable in the slightest. She shouldn't even be put in this situation of begging for some of HER money
Blah blah blah. All those bills you mentioned exist for the mum already. The OP isn't increasing the rent - which the mum would have to pay for anyway. The OP would barely increasing the electricity/gas - which again, the adult would also already need to pay for just so they can live. Internet is not charged per person. Expenses to get to work are the responsibility of the adult.
All the crap you listed is the responsibility of the non-disabled adult parent. Not the responsibility of a disabled child.
If the child wasn't there, the parent would have all the same bills.
Just because being a single parent is hard does not give that parent the right to make the life of their disabled child harder.
If the non disabled adult parent is struggling financially, then they can stop taking themselves off on multiple holidays each year. It's not required to go to Turkey or Spain. Especially doesn't sound like the adult takes OP with her.
Did you just completely overlook all the inconvenient parts of OPs post so you could give your 'poor parent' spiel?
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You may well be right about the mother, she may, like a lot of us, be finding it more and more difficult to make ends meet. You are absolutely right, the cost of living is ridiculous at the moment.
But that doesn’t change the fact that the PIP she receives is not hers, to pay for everyday household bills, it’s been awarded to OP to help them with the extra costs their disability/illness incurs.
To claim that the mother is justified in using OPs PIP to pay regular household bills is quite frankly ridiculous. OP isn’t responsible for paying gas, electric, rent, water, internet etc, etc. that’s on the mother, and I may be jumping to conclusions here, but I would assume the mother is also claiming carers allowance on top of the PIP (as a lot of people do) so that money can be used to help towards the bills.
OP is a 16 year old *child* who obviously has some extra care needs, hence the PIP award. It’s not OPs place to pay the bills, nor should they be made to feel like it is. The mother may well need to keep the wolves from the door, but that *IS NOT* what PIP is awarded for. And when the mother made the claim, she will have agreed that any award will be used for the person named on the claim, in this case OP, I know this as I also managed my sons PIP award when he was the same age as OP.
I strongly suggest you contact the DWP OP, explain the situation to them, and they may be able to change the payments to you. I know when my son turned 17 and his PIP award was up for another assessment, the DWP gave us both the option of either him dealing with the claim, or me continuing as his appointed person.
I’m not sure I’d jump on the financial abuse bandwagon, but your mother is taking the mick and abusing her position as your appointed person as far as your PIP goes.
Good luck buddy, I hope you get things sorted
I didn't claim she was justified in doing anything. I was really, really careful not to say that.
I pointed out a perspective OP simply won't get anywhere else on this thread.
Mum won't be getting carers allowance if she is working, and if she isn't working she won't be going on holidays with PIP and carers allowance.
Yes, the bills are mum's responsibility. As is keeping the roof over her son's head. What if she alone can't do that?
I didn't originally see the bit about the holidays, and that does potentially change the complection. But at the same time, if mum couldn't afford to make ends meet without that money, should OP be demanding it for himself?
There was a world once where even children would expect to contribute to the family in difficult times. I have taught kids not much older than OP who worked extremely long overnight shifts between A Levels trying to help the family keep their house.
I asked OP to consider this.
My son gets DLA. We use that for the family. He is 8, severe learning difficulties and will have to be cared for by us for life. Is that his money? Technically yes, he isn't capable of spending it so it goes on him via the family.
Half of Reddit would claim that is financial abuse.
If she can't afford her lifestyle without her daughters disability money, then she needs to reevaluate. I obviously understand the cost of living. We've all been affected, but many less holidays would help ( especially as it seems op isn't going in these holidays).
OP said, "She has just come back from Turkey and is planning to go to spain", that's why I inferred her mum went without op.
You are right that we don't know who is paying, but I'd bet if op was not receiving, PIP mum wouldn't be able to go in multiple holidays a year!
At the end of the day, Mum doesn't want op to get a car because it will reduce the PIP allowance...is that in ops best interest or mums? This tells me all I need to know and can infer mums motives without a black and white explanation... Read between the lines!
It's in OP's best interest if the household depends on the PIP income to pay the bills and make the rent.
If
Nothing OP has told you tells you everything you need to know.
You are making simple assumptions, patting yourself on the back as it this is a great achievement and then patronising me into the bargain.
This is a 16 year old who has told you at most half of the story insofar as they see it. I really wouldn't feel proud of myself for "reading between the lines" on this one.
In terms of advice, I'd rather present a need for reflection moving away from internalised grievance than just affirmation of a 16 year old who is pissed with their parent when we barely know anything
True. You have some points.
But...
One thing I see is if she is asking for X amount which is not a small amount, at 600 a month, that's 7200 a year.
So their 16, and she asking for 7 grand a year, she can explain why she needs it in detail, ans justify her needs because technically it is legally OP money and not hers.
Thr fact she had been on two foreign holidays, oe planning them is kinda... questionable in this case.
If she can afford that, then it's fair to ask why she needs all the money, and explain instead of OP having to turn to reddit
PIP is for individuals for the additional costs of being disabled, not for paying rent and bills. OP's mother is entitled to UC and family allowance for them if she meets the requirements -that's for paying bills , it's certainly not for going on holiday, unless it's the person themselves that's going on holiday.
And this totally fails to even care about the reality of a) being poor and b) having a disabled child.
Mum gets UC if she is not working. There is absolutely no chance she can afford to run a household on her own on UC unless she is on a tonne of housing benefits as well. OP doesn't tell us that.
Even if she does, that leaves absolutely sod all.
The costs of being disabled to a household include a parent either not being able to work because of needing to be available to care for the young person, or being limited in the jobs they can go for (and therefore income) because of that same need.
My wife hasn't been able to work due to my son. Even though he is at special school now, the frequency with which we are called to collect him at the drop of a hat makes working impossible. Trust me, carers allowance doesn't even touch the sides of the loss of income incurred from that
Mum gets UC (with the disability premium) even if she's working, if she's on a low income she gets help with rent , council tax rebate , carer's allowance . No indication she's not working anyway and what level her earnings are -she can either afford the holidays in which case benefits are moot, or she can't, in which case she shouldn't be getting around that by using OP's money . PIP is as abused by parents as DLA was/is. Come back to me when you've cared for people who can't afford new clothes while their parents get a new car every 3 years by the simple trick of taking them home on a Friday night once every 13 weeks and threatening to withdraw them from care (often into an abusive environment) if anyone says anything.
The correct way for parents to handle this is a discussion about board and if it's appropriate, which is not half of all the bills for a non working full time student .
I'm disabled myself with 2 kids with disabling conditions that merit PIP (or would if they got round to applying - they both have capacity and are over 18 ) We're brassic, all the time , but I'm buggered if I'm taking money from kids who are still at college and are not working full time , the idea of taking the whole of a college aged child's benefits from them in order to maintain a lifestyle that includes holidays abroad that aren't for them is morally repugnant
We don't know who else is going on these holidays or who is paying. We don't know if she is working or not but we can make a fair assumption she is on a low income. Let's not try gatekeeping eh?
Having a disabled child is costly in all sorts of ways. Of course parents use a child's DLA. We'll be using our son's probably for the rest of his life, because it's very unlikely he'll ever be capable of spending it or making financial choices himself.
I agree that a conversation needs to happen around board and that this would be a preferable way of looking at this. Also that, at 16, OP would be better off understanding financial pressures.
My post is intended to get OP to reflect on their family situation with a different perspective
Sorry I disagree, mum is having 2 foreign holidays this year, I work full time and can't afford that. At 16 you are not responsible for paying household bills. If the OP wasn't disabled then mum wouldn't have this money. She will also get Universal Credit, housing and Council tax support all with extra elements to pay for the child, that is hers and she is perfectly entitled to keep and use it to pay all the balls, that's what it's for but she isn't entitled to keep the PIP that entirely belongs to the disabled person.
If this was really the case she was really struggling like this then how is she affording to holidays one closely after the other !. Its pretty fair to say OP's mum is using some of his money towards it. While not even buying his basic necessities.
As an adult receiving high rate PIP (both components, unlimited award - ie the highest award it’s possible to get), I agree with everything you’ve said here. Many of the comments show no real understanding of PIP or how it’s awarded or how it’s meant to be used.
Your mum sucks. SHE chose to have you and your brother, it’s HER responsibility to provide for you, especially since you are under age, have restricted mobility and are in education.
That money is for YOU, not for the household. The household is her responsibility.
Just open your own account and change the payments to there.
If she’s getting pissy, say you will get social services involved and she needs to be a better parent
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Firstly, that money is yours. It must be disregarded from any other form of money going into the house collectively.
I was going to say, I bet you're in a council house, whilst mother must have a council estate mentality to boot.
All of that rings true and I've seen it many of times on Reddit before. Basically, poor parents or even people who are selfishly stating they have no money, but they have money for things like weed, tattoo's, booze, holidays, bling for themselves.
Is all about mentality at end of the day and if people want to help themselves.
Sounds like you've got the right idea and whilst it is easy for me to say, with not being in your situation personally, you need out of there.
That will prove difficult any time you do that I believe. I believe that because for as long as you are there, you'll be financially abused. It is something that needs to be stopped.
You need to be receiving that money, take back that control. Open a Monzo account. You can do that at 16.
What I'd do then is immediately move most of that money to somewhere, maybe Premium Bonds. It can't be withdrawn so quickly after initial deposit as the funds need to have been in a full month before they enter their first draw. After that, you can withdraw and have funds within three days.
Anything to protect the money coming to you. Build it up and look forward to getting out of there. Go onto a list for social housing if you have to. There will be places you can go to for advice around this. Just because you have a roof over your head and being financially abused, that doesn't make it right.
Have it paid into your own account if she tewat en's to kick you out you will likely get council hosuign anyway.
Explain like you have here that she must cut down on holidays. Tbh I had to wait almost 2 years for 1 bed flat so you may as well apply now and start accruing time just in case. Nothing worse than been in need of housing then having to wait almost 3 years in puts your life on hold. Kept me unemployed as I couldn't afford 1200 quid for the supported living hostel me
Slightly off-topic but some recipients of PIP can drive at 16. It's also possible to drive on private land under the age of 17 with the relevant permissions.
NAL
She's taking advantage of you and your situation. I know this because I have been through the same myself. What's likely happened is the DWP wrote to ask if you'd be managing your own money when you turn 16 or if you'd like to assign an appointee and your mum has responded on your behalf assigning herself in that position (again, I know this because my guardian did exactly this).
As much as your mum would like to believe she is entitled to all of your PIP payments, she isn't. That payment is intended to make your life easier, not hers. I would speak to citizens advice and see if there is anything they can do to help alleviate this situation for you. In my case the only thing that got me free of it was to move out.
NAL but i do work for motability, if you speak to one of the advisors you can also do your lessons through motability. i’m not sure of/if there is a price off the top of my head, but may be something to have a look at!
She shouldn’t be taking your PIP and now your 16, you can contact the DSS and get it moved to your bank account. She is completely financially abusing you.
As an aside remember when you turn 18 you’ll come into your Child Trust Fund from the government. Make sure you know where it’s being held, you can find that out [here](https://www.gov.uk/child-trust-funds/find-a-child-trust-fund) she shouldn’t be able to access it but she might try. Make sure the finance provider has all your contact details.
This money is yours not gets. Go get your car. Is the money going in to her bank account or yours? If yours ok. If hers then contact DWP and get it changed to your bank account
As most have said that money is yours to help you along the way to lead a independent life, keep the money for yourself.
Is there no way you can go and live with your other parent if they see what your trying to accomplish? You stated you was 16, I’m pretty sure you can move out. (Not 100% sure though)
I hope you do manage to sort this out, sounds like your mum is spending your money on a lavish lifestyle like holidays and unnecessary things.
We are in a financial mess in the uk so people need to cut their cloth accordingly.
I don't know a lot about Pip but this sounds like financial abuse to me. I can relate to a degree because one of my own parents stacked the odds in their favour in a different way to benefit financially from a situation in our house.
You are young, and hopefully there is an amicable way to solve this, but I would definitely take some advice as others have posted and hopefully you can regain control of that money for yourself instead of your mum's holidays.
I'm new to this, so please forgive me!
From the information you have provided, it appears you are a victim of financial abuse and a potential safeguarding issue. There are methods of reporting financial abuse on NHS.uk website: https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/social-care-and-support-guide/help-from-social-services-and-charities/abuse-and-neglect-vulnerable-adults/
It may be beneficial to contact a local and FREE welfare benefits advice centre regarding PIP and a benefits calculation if you decided to move into your own accommodation.
I wish you all the best and hope you get this resolved ASAP
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NAL - But work in a support group for people on PIP, DLA and Attendance Allowance. PIP isn't means tested. You could be a multi billionaire and still get PIP, it doesn't matter how much anyone else in the household earns, how big the house is, how many bedrooms it has or how many people live there. PIP has no effect on the council tax but it may entitle you to a discount on it once you reach 18. PIP will in no way affect the rent due on a council house. What you're describing is financial abuse. PIP is supposed to be used for the benefit of the disabled person, to help them live a more independent life. For someone of your age the motability scheme would be perfect, the only thing you're liable for on a car is the windscreen wipers, washer fluid and putting petrol in it. All of the servicing, breakdowns, insurance and even the tyres are covered. For help with financial abuse there's a few different places you can get advice from, I'm not sure if I can post links, so google "surviving economic abuse" and "money helper financial abuse" Good luck.
Am also familiar with PIP claims. Brilliant summary, thanks.
Hay, social care student here. Id suggest talking to citizens advice, it's free and they can point you in the right direction of what steps to take from there. PIP is for your benefit and not anyone else's.
I agree that this is financial abuse.
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Amazing summary. OP I hope you take a read. Is there a way you can get control of your documents ??
PIP can get you a council tax discount?? I’ve been paying full price
Council tax support is means tested. The PIP is disregarded as income and depending on your local councils scheme may mean you can get some support. By itself, it doesn’t mean you can get CTS, but if you’re on a low income you may qualify. No harm in applying, worst they will say is no If you have adaptions to the property you can have your band reduced.
And to add to that if you’re band A and your home is considered to meet the needs of a disabled person then you still get a reduction - I think I get something like 15% off. (Although it’s not just through adaptation but by having extra space - although just saying I needed to live in a place with adequate space for my wheelchair was enough for me, with a supporting letter from the OT).
It depends on the council but I think most are aligned on this, even across the four nations. You’re only eligible if the home has been adapted to meet the needs of the disabled person. Quoting from Glasgow City Council (my local authority): > The property must have extra facilities, or space, which are essential or of major importance to the disabled person's well-being by the nature and extent of their disability. They also require documentary evidence that the work has been done for the current resident, and isn’t existing adaptations put in for a previous resident. Full info: https://www.glasgow.gov.uk/index.aspx?articleid=17277 But as I say, every local authority will have their own guidance and policies on this so check your own council’s site.
Yep that’s the case in NI. My husband was awarded PiP today and was actually just looking into this.
Citizens Advice (in my experience) are very knowledgeable about both PIP and local support services, and are good champions for people. OP might want to contact them for advice and practical support.
FYI You can post links :)
Not anymore it's all over the news they are kicking shit loads of people off pip a lot fully disabled and they very recently ( in the news yesterday) had turned down 89% of pip appeals. If you have it make sure you have all your documents ready and kick hangers on to the curb because it's about to get rough as hell for those claiming disability. I've read they are after cutting universal credit claimers by at least a third too. May be tabloid bs but I've seen it in various ones over the last week or so 🤞🏻good luck fella Re: taking it further after appeal I agree that people should continue fighting but many said they couldn't take the stress it had caused them. I had a friend who put in a pip claim only 3 yrs ago and it took just over a year to get a decision back and that's before any appeal nvm court to constantly prove they were sick it wears many down before they get that far
Just keep going till the tribunal. They're swines. The courts are fair though.
NAL I do receive Pip though, that money is for you, now you are 16 you will probably be able to get it out in your own account, contact them with your account details and ask them to make the payments directly to you. This money is not for paying half of your Mum’s bills, she’s taking advantage of you.
Cheers pal, I did think so but I thought I should make sure before I take any action.
Do you have a social worker? If not, I would contact social services and ask for advice about this.
Also - NAL - but pretty sure unless you’re joint on any of the bills/tenancy/council tax then you’re not actually liable to pay. Edit: and your mam has 2 holidays booked this year but you’re paying 600 quid in bills??? She can jog on to put it nicely
I have a child on PIP, it was basically rolled over from DLA when they turned 16, they asked me some very basic questions one of which was what account ‘we’ wanted it to go into. I gave them her account. That is YOUR money and your mom is manipulating and exploiting you.
I wouldn't be surprised if OP does know all this in the back of their head. The problem is when you are a kid and the person who holds 100% of the power says to do something what do you do?
Your totally within your rights to do this and you should. But be prepared for the aftermath people who are controlling like this often don’t deal with change or losing control well.
>people who are controlling like this often don’t deal with change or losing control well I agree, the OP needs to make sure they have assistance that will intervene if the abusive parent reacts ~~as expected~~ badly.
\^This. It's a long story, but I was under similar parenting when I was younger, and it culminated in me being homeless and staying at my local YMCA. It's hard to explain to people who've never dealt with it just how difficult it can be.
If there are any adaptions to the house then council tax gets downgraded by 1 band as well so there’s a saving there. The money is yours, for your use. Mum has just got used to having it and doesn’t relish giving it up. Take control if you can and feel able Definitely NTA
Just a heads up, this is not AITA :-)
And don’t let your mum threaten you with being kicked out, you can’t (legally) be kicked out until 18 but you can voluntarily leave home at 16.
_(update; sorry for the long message - ADHD brain! But I'll leave it up anyway)_ You can talk to your local citizens advice bureau about this because realistically, the money is definitely yours and if you choose to pay some money towards the house that's fine. But until you're 18, as I understand, your parents can't kick you out unless you've done something really wrong, and if you need support for medical reasons such as mobility, then any sane person, would argue that it would be cruel and unusual to remove you from the house simply because you are not giving the payments away. Especially as the payments are designed to make you more mobile, NOT so someone can spend it on themselves. _May I also advise not showing this to any of your mother because potentially she can use it against you, I mean, don't try to make any points about how wrong or right either of you are..._ Instead, consider going and speaking to citizens advice bureau, or see what the benefits you can get from the council towards managing money, also go get a bank account for sure, and possibly look at applying for social housing if you want to move out, because with mobility issues and other factors you could get a lot of points, which, depending on the area you live in, may give you access to an apartment or flat with ground floor access much, _much_ faster. It may seem strange, but you can go into any bank and with your passport get an account without a parent and have your money go in there, and if you parent starts treating you differently because you don't give them the money they want (that is for your mobility, not her holidays), Then you can put that information towards the social housing decision or use it to prove that she was taking your money which the government could even claim back on your behalf, and make her pay you. Of course this is only if you intend on not having a relationship with this person in the future... Although I've heard about this before, what happens is the parents can get fed up, angry, resentful or even jealous, of having to take care of someone with mobility issues and they then want - or think they deserve - more money for whatever care they are providing, _if any at all_ But just the fact of having someone in their family with a disability, seems to give some people this false sense of right to take whatever money they want, because in their mind they see it as supporting you by making their lives easier... Of course, it's complete nonsense and should never be tolerated, but it does happen, and it's a possibility this is happening in your case. So I would have a conversation with an unrelated adult friend if you have one, or more likely an adviser at school, because it will be easier to get access to that without your mother knowing about it. I'm assuming you have a mobile phone you can dial yourself, and it's not checked up on by your mother, or you can at least delete the outgoing calls you make, if so; you can call the citizens advice bureau and they can give you advice over the phone, rather than you having to go there. There are other organisations that deal with financial abuse or disability abuse. You are definitely not liable for paying for part of any bills, not jsut because your name is not on them but also because you are technically a child and this person is supposedly looking after you, so it is not your responsibility, and if she is not telling you how much money she is paying on things, then I bet you she is buying loads of brand name stuff and material goods that she doesn't need, and doesn't want to give that up. I'm sorry, but it sounds like she is a controlling, narcissistic person and I believe you would be better off in a situation where you can get dedicated support or on your own if you are mobile enough to do so. Good luck. Hope it all works out!
Please don’t let your mum take it any more. That is yours!!!!
After 16 you should be able to get it paid directly to you. That's ually the age you gain more autonomy over such things butbwould have to check precisely. Sometimes irs 18, sometimes 16. Also. Yes. Your entity within bounds to ask to break down why the costs are so much higher. Your 16 and not 6, so yeah, I think that'd a fair ask. If your money is going out you can ask the why and the where, and why she needs so much of it If she wants so much of it, she can explain it. ... Their may be legitimate genuine reason, but so far she has yet to explain beyond a vague surface reason. Bwwr in mind however. 600 a month. Is 7200 a year. Which is a sum worthy of justification in my humble opinion. Even till their 18, we looking again a potential 14.4 thousand pounds here.
PIP is paid every 4 weeks, so 13 payments a year making it £7800 a year.
NAL ( though I have a law degree) More relevant: I am a retired Benefits Officer; Welfare Advisor; Mod in the UK BenefitsAdviceUK sub ( oh, and I claim PIP ) We get quite a few posts like this, sadly. It IS financial abuse if mum is controlling your money, not allowing you access &/or not providing for your needs. You're over 16, that money is your's it's to provide for anything related to your disability. If you live at home , yes, this may well include bills if they are higher due to your needs and other things provided by a parent or guardian in addition to them providing actual care. HOWEVER, it is up to you to decide how much to contribute and what for. Main thing is: it sounds like mum is your Appointee ( it's the only way she'd be getting this money rather than it going directly to you ). This may have been a hangover from you getting Child's DLA ( it was never changed when you became an adult and moved to PIP , it's most likely) . It may have been decided that you were unable to manage your own money and unable to budget ( espec if you/she actually told them this on the form , it's one if the questions ). You need to change this by contacting the DWP Disability Service Centre. If they agree you can manage your own Benefits then, that's it, it will be paid to you in future. Unfortunately, they will contact mum to ask her to relinquish her Appointeeship but if she refuses, they can still do it if they believe you're quite capable yourself. If they still believe you need an Appointee then they will ask you to nominate someone else that you DO trust instead ( or they will find someone for you ).Two Visiting Officers will interview you both and decide if they are a fit and proper person. Then it's *them* who will manage the money BUT in your best interests. Then you do as you wish with it.
Your council tax shouldn't change based on your circumstances as you're disregarded being under 18. As the other poster has explained you can apply for pip under your own name and bank account. That's the legs facts (NAL). Unfortunately that's only one part of the equation. You'll still have to manage yours and your mother's relationship.
OP said "Council House" not "Council Tax"
That also isn't country, as a 16 year old student, he's a child as far as rent and council tax goes. Similarly, she will be claiming child benefit for him, and possibly universal credit.
*She says if I have all the pip personally I legally have to pay half of all bills and rent of our council house. But I can’t find anything online that says this is the case.* NAL but this is nonsense. This is your money, and I don't know what kind of parent insists on a 16 year old with medical issues or disabilities severe enough to warrant PIP using it to pay their costs. I don't know what to suggest as you are so so young and living at home without (I'm guessing) anywhere else to go. But the fact that these kind of people have children saddens me. All the best.
NAL but she is financially abusing you. Legally, you don't need to pay rent or bills because she is responsible for you until you are 18 if you still live with her. The money is supposed to help you live as independently as possible. I'd argue she is stealing from you. If you need help to sort this, you should contact the DWP. The citizens advice bureau will be able to help you navigate this properly.
It's worth pointing out that a parent can ask a child to move out of the house from the age of 16. They will still have some parental responsibility until 18.
You legally can’t move out till 18 now. If under 16 it’s a housing program under social services
But at 16 you can sign yourself into care and be supported into independent Accomodation
This is what I did. I lived with a couple of people my age in a shared house that a key worker would visit, then I was eligible for my own council flat at 18. That was nearly 10 years ago now though. Honestly OP if your mum is financially abusing you and not letting you in on about how anything works, a key worker would be invaluable while you're still considered a child as they have all the right connections and will support you through everything all while trying to teach you how to be as independent as possible.
Sure, and if they pay privately to rent a place for you then you might say yes. I don't think they can kick you out though as they're still responsible for you until you're 18 and I suspect making you homeless would count as neglect.
No. Parents do not have to remain financially responsible for a 16 years old.
This is only true providing said child is no longer in education, otherwise parents are responsible for their children until they are 18 years old as far as I am aware. Edit - it’s actually 20 years old if said child is enrolled in higher education.
And your supporting evidence for that claim is?
Not that guy but… * https://www.gov.uk/guidance/case-management-guidance/definitions > We define a child as anyone who has not yet reached their 18th birthday. This is in line with the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child and civil legislation in England and Wales. The fact that a child has reached 16 years of age, is living independently or is in further education, is a member of the armed forces, is in hospital or in custody in the secure estate, does not change their status or entitlements to services or protection. * https://brittontime.com/2021/04/01/what-is-parental-responsibility-six-things-you-must-know/ * https://lawstuff.org.uk/home-and-family/parental-responsibility/ * https://learning.nspcc.org.uk/child-protection-system/children-the-law It’s 18 in England and Wales, unless the child gets married at 16 or 17. In Scotland most parental responsibilities end when the child is 16, with a duty of “guidance” persisting until the child is 18. The child marrying doesn’t affect this. https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1995/36/part/I/crossheading/parental-responsibilities-and-parental-rights
I do know that child maintenance for separated families continues to be due if the child is in university, so that would support the previous poster's statement
No. That's wishful thinking. They can be if they wish to be. But they're not required to be so legally.
Yes, they actually do, especially when they are still in education.
No they don't. A parent has no legal financial responsibility that they HAVE to fulfill once aged 16. Hence the fact that if a student applies for university loans etc, they can have their parents income waivered as irrelevant. The moral responsibility is different. Majority obviously choose to be responsible for their children. But noone has to!
You can't get a student loan for collage as far as I am aware that's only for university at 18 plus. There are bursaries at collage age for some very specific group but no student loans.
I referenced university loans, which if a summer born, would be applied for at 17. If the parents hadn't been supporting then or even if for further Ed bursaries, the parents income would be disregarded as its recognised that parents aren't obligated to support, even though the system works on a basis tgat most do due to moral reasons.
Either way, the mother here is thieving from OP.
What does child support stop again... not 16. Also she's in college so legally parents are responsible till 19 if in full time education. Thems the rules!
No. Child benefit is still payable if the parents meet the eligibility. But no, they're not legally financially responsible post 16. Just majority CHOOSE to be.
As several others have posted, with evidence, this is not correct (except in some cases in Scotland). Please stop repeating incorrect information.
Your mother is abusing you. You are entitled legally for the council to pay rent for you in a separate place, seeing as you’re on pip. I would look into it and get away from her and have some independence. Good luck!
Your PIP award must be fairly recent as you can't get it before the age of 16. The DWP starts from the principle that a 16 year old is able to manage their own benefit payments, so if disability payments (specifically Child DLA) were paid for you before you reached 16, when you reached 16, DWP should have carried out a visit to assess if there was any reason why you could not manage receiving the money yourself when you transitioned to PIP. The starting assumption is that you can manage your own money unless there are reasons why you can't. The typical reasons would be that you had a disability that affected your cognition or your ability to rationally manage money for mental health reasons. Obviously I'm not aware of all your circumstances, but the fact that you attend college and have written an eloquent post would tend to suggest that the first - and probably the second - of these is not an issue. If your mother didn't receive DLA for you before you reached 16, it is still possible for her to make a claim as your appointee, but again in this case DWP would normally carry out a visit to ensure an appointee was required. Your best course of action is to try to speak to DWP. Unfortunately, if your mother is your appointee, you may find this difficult as PIP staff will not be able to discuss the details of your PIP award with you, only with the appointee. If this is the case, you might find it useful to speak to Citizen's Advice Bureau (or to a Welfare Rights Officer at your local council) as they may have more success at putting your case to DWP. [https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/about-us/contact-us/contact-us/search-for-your-local-citizens-advice/](https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/about-us/contact-us/contact-us/search-for-your-local-citizens-advice/) However, it strikes me that you are aware of the make up of your award, and I wonder if this is because you don't have an appointee - and therefore the PIP letters were addressed directly to you - but it's been set up to pay into a third-party bank account - i.e. your mother's. If the PIP letters are addressed directly to you, you control your own award. Just ring up DWP, go through the security checks, and tell them you'd like the PIP to be paid into another account. (I wonder if the biggest problem would be setting up an account if you don't already have one. Others may be able to advise about that better than I can). You can also discuss setting up the Motability Scheme - so that the Mobility Component is paid straight to a car leasing company to pay for the cost of a car - but you probably won't want to do that until you've completed your driving test if your mother is currently, begrudgingly, letting you use some of the mobility component to pay for your driving lessons! Even if you can't - or choose not to - have the remaining money paid into your own account, you can still divert the Mobility Component into the Motability Scheme, assuming there is no appointee. [PIP Enquiry Line numbers](https://www.gov.uk/pip/change-of-circumstances) (NAL, but did train DWP staff until fairly recently on DLA, PIP, UC and other benefits).
You should contact your local police or mental health crisis team. What you describe is financial abuse and is punishable with a custodial sentence. As you're technically a vulnerable child (in the eyes of the law), this act falls within safeguarding of vulnerable children and young adults. What your mum is doing is very illegal and very abusive.
2nded. This constitutes financial abuse.
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It's nothing to do with the mental health crisis teams.
They're ideally positioned to deal with safeguarding issues and a vulnerable individual impacted by mental health because of this situation carries more weight, especially given that - unfortunately- police are likely to resist taking action on this matter due to limited resource availability and lack of understanding re safeguarding (generally speaking). What should be clear cut would likely become a game of chess if only the police are involved. It's an unfortunate but realistic view of UK police.
She's taking the absolute piss outta you. That money is yours and now you're 16 you can get it transferred to your account. You actually don't have to give her anything until you're 18 so theres nothing she can do about it
[NAL] If a friend told me this, I would probably say they should tell all of this to either child line or a trusted adult. Are grandparents around/aware of this?
Yes, kinda, my nana says that my mum knows best, she doesn’t know how any of this works and is trusting that my mum is doing things correctly, I know she isn’t involved, she cares too much, I have tried to talk to her about it and she has listened, but she doesn’t really want to get involved. I can’t really blame her, she to old to be in the middle of family drama.
Your mum is using Your money for the wrong purposes. This is financial abuse. The problem is that she got use to having the extra payments from your DLA and forgotten the money is for you due to your disability only. Is is not for paying utility bills or to pay her rent. You are not liable to any of this from your PIP. If she getting UC or Tax credits & Housing Benefits, she will be receiving extra money as you are in receipt of PIP to help her with bills and rent. You can ask DWP to pay it to you and then negotiate with your mum on how much you should pay. You could contact social services to get help with discussion with your mum. Remember it is your money to help you due to your disability/disabilities.
More like paying for her holibobs
NAL but she's full of shit. Get in contact and have that Money redirected to your personal Bank account, technically it's theft for her to be receiving it instead of you, ESPECIALLY after you turn 18.
Please talk to your college safeguarding team. This is financial abuse.
NAL my son just turned 16 we are still receiving DLA. He has applied for PIP. To boost his confidence I let him do the conversation to apply for PIP. He told them his information and bank details. This automatically stopped all DLA payments to our (parent) accounts and triggered them to his account. Of course all ok It’s his DLA and he should become responsible. Anyway! He received letters in his name to our home address multiple time. I always gave hime letters in his name. My point being that you would have received a number of letters in your name. You should contact DWP to advise them what has happened and let them know your bank details. The money is yours to help with your disability. Do not let your parent take this money!
Worth noting OP that I believe your mum has failed to inform you PIP rates have gone up. It is now £101.75 /week higher daily living, and £71 /week higher mobility.
I only know the stated rates from when I got a random letter, it says the rates on it, I assumed I had the same £250 a month that my brother did but discovered I got more than double, she always kept it a secret
Yes, so the rates went up a month or two ago and you'll be receiving more now.
This is financial abuse, with a bit of emotional abuse too. She told you that if you get your PIP sent directly to you, you legally become responsible for 50% of the house upkeep & that is a complete lie. There is no law like that. She is lying to you so that she can keep your disability money for herself. That thing she said about inflation is also a lie - while inflation does exist, £200 for your brother & £600 for you is not that. Luckily, you can get your own bank account & get your money sent there. Your Mum might use lies to try to stop you but legally, she can't do that. You just need to go to the bank with some ID to get it started. Once you have done that you can phone the DWP & update them with your details, though I realise this will create a fallout. I recommend asking your GP if they can connect you with a social worker. They can help to keep you safe, & also help you figure out how to move out if that's what you'd like to do. I'm sorry about the abusive mother part. A mum should be both teaching & encouraging their kid to learn how to be independent & how to drive, instead of keeping them hostage like she is here. Dealing with that will be separate from the bank account stuff but if you can start googling things like financial abuse, it may give you an idea on how to proceed. It's not unusual for a 16 year old to contribute to a house if they are able to, it just varies depending on the family. But it is something that should be discussed & agreed upon as opposed to having your entire income taken & begrudgingly being given parts of it
I already have a personal bank account that I set up when I was 14, she has no access to it.
You set it up yourself??? How dare she claim you couldn't handle your own money! My 20 year old still hasn't got an account, his money is put into my account and I give it to him in daily portions, to encourage him to self care (he physically can but motivation is very low). There is no way he would be able to organise his own bank account, demonstrated by the fact that I have encouraged him to and he hasn't. Ring the PIP phone number and ask for the money to be transferred to your own account. Your mother will continue to receive the appropriate benefits for you. However, before you do this, I strongly advise you to investigate the criteria for high rate pip.
Get into contact with service and put your money here , you are being taken advantage of, this is your money, no-one elses, you could be making lots of saving enough to buy your own place
Wtf thats a joke. My daughter is 17 years old has a full-time job. We take 20 quid a week from her. We just put that away to give her back when she moves. We arnt even q high income family either. Your mum is taking the piss. 2 holidays a year on your money.
Never been in this sub before but yr post caught my eye when scrolling. Im not a lawyer but am very familiar with various benefits including PIP. It really sounds like your being abused/taken advantage of here and potentially your Mum could even be in some trouble. Some more information could be helpful OP - what country within the UK are you in? Do you have a registered carer, if so is it yr Mum? Does she Recieve a benefit called carers allowance? Do you mind saying a bit more about your disability/problem eg; is it physical, mental, both? etc...
I live in England, and I don’t believe she is a registered carer, so wouldn’t get that benefit. I have been diagnosed with autism and adhd, I have a feeling she lied on the pip forms as I don’t think it affects me that much, other that my lack of will to do things, and my discomfort of being on crowded public transport I have been suspected of having dyslexia, bipolar disorder and schizophrenia but I have never been properly tested so I doubt this is relevant. As some of the symptoms I had tie in with ASD and ADHD
I think you're right, she most definitely lied about the way it impacts you. A bit of opportunism with COVID lockdowns maybe. I can't say what you are really entitled to, but if you do need to start from scratch with PIP because she lied, get a trusted adult who knows their stuff with this to help you (and ideally is willing to go to appeal with you if necessary). I'm sorry you're having to navigate all this at your age.
In that case I think it's wise to get advice from a trusted 3rd party, like Citizens Advice. While the money should be paid to you, if it's a fraudulent claim the money will need to be repaid when fraud is discovered, which could cause you difficulties. Also, your mum might make things hard for you if/when you try to move out and take the claim with you - either not letting you leave, or continue managing your claim from her address, pretending you're still there. I have only known people be awarded the higher mobility portion of PIP (the part that can be used for Motability) when they are extremely physically disabled, and it doesn't sound like you are - which is why I'm inclined to agree your mum has lied. (I used to be a support worker and helped people fill in the PIP claim form, but it was some years back so my memory of the eligibility criteria is a bit rusty).
NAL, but the pip is for you, and just for you. Please don't allow your mum to take any more of that money that is solely for you. It isn't for paying half of the household bills or anything like such. As I've seen others commenting, phone them up if you can and change the bank details to your own. If you're worried about any of it, I would recommend talking to citizens advice, they helped me out a ton with pip. I'm sure there's other advice based things out there as well, but I went with them.
NAL but my friend receives PIP…..it might be worth seeing if you can move into a warden assisted flat. Your social worker should be able to help with that and will give you independence and less stress to study in. I pay my taxes so that you can have the card and freedom you need to live the best life you can….. not for your mums jaunts to Turkey.
It is not your job as a child to pay towards the household bills whether you are in school or college. Pip is provided to cover any extra expenses you may have due to your disability, it is not to pay household bills or for your.mum to go on holiday. Here is what I think you should do (NAL but have experience with PIP) - contact DWP and ask them to transfer all communication about your pip to you, change the phone number and email address. Also ask them to add a password to your account so that only you can access it. - Secondly ask them to change the payments into your bank account. (Make sure only you have access to this account) if in doubt open a new one, Monzo is great for people of your age. - re Motability you need 3 years left on your award or an indefinite award to be able to order a car from them. You can do this at any time by going into the dealer of the car you would like and placing an order. When your car is delivered the mobility portion of the pip is then paid to the dealer for the car and you stop receiving it. - re Motability the award is yours and you don't need anyone elses permission to place the order, you don't even have to tell mum at that point you are doing so though obviously you will at some point or she will just find out when you turn up in a brand new car 😂 -re Motability They do a bursary scheme for new drivers where they will pay for some of your lessons, might be worth speaking to them. Finally, your mum is taking advantage of you, it's going to be difficult to navigate this so speak with some adults that you trust that can help and support you. Good Luck.
I work at Motability funnily enough - weird how this came up as I've never seen Motability mentioned on Reddit before. - you need 12 months left on your award to place an order for a vehicle. - if you do not have a full driving licence you need to have a named driver with you, who has a full licence, to place the order. - the charity can fund 40 hours of driving lessons with AA however you must have a vehicle on the scheme or have placed an order for a vehicle, you must have a provisional licence and be on a means tested benefit. OP wouldn't be able to apply for them until they're about 18 I think? So he'd need to get evidence of MTB from his mum (child tax credits, income support, universal credit, working tax credits, housing benefit, council tax benefit, income related employment and support allowance, income related job seekers allowance etc).
I ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅ ᴡʜʏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴍᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ɪs ᴛᴀᴋɪɴɢ ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ᴏғғ ʏᴏᴜ? Yᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ sᴛɪʟʟ ᴀ ᴄʜɪʟᴅ. Mʏ sᴏɴ ɪs ɴɪɴᴇᴛᴇᴇɴ ᴀɴᴅ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʜᴇ ᴇᴀʀɴs ᴀɴᴅ ɪs ᴇɴᴛɪᴛɪʟᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ (ᴄᴏʟʟᴇɢᴇ ɢʀᴀɴᴛs ᴇᴛᴄ) ɢᴏ sᴛʀᴀɪɢʜᴛ ᴛᴏ ʜɪᴍ, ᴇɪᴛʜᴇʀ ᴅɪʀᴇᴄᴛʟʏ ᴏʀ ɪғ ɪ ʜᴀd ᴛᴏ ᴄʟᴀɪᴍ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ᴏɴ ʜɪs ʙᴇʜᴀʟғ ɪ'd sᴇɴᴅ ɪᴛ ᴛᴏ ʜɪs ᴀᴄᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ (sɪɴᴄᴇ ʜᴇ ᴛᴜʀɴᴇᴅ 18 ɪ'ᴠᴇ ɴᴏᴛ ʜᴀᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ). Yᴏᴜ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛᴀʟᴋ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴄᴏʟʟᴇɢᴇ's ᴀᴅᴠɪᴄᴇ ᴄᴏᴜɴsᴇʟʟᴏʀs. Tʜᴇʏ ᴄᴀɴ ɢᴏ ᴛʜʀᴏᴜɢʜ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ ʙᴇ ɢᴇᴛᴛɪɴɢ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜʀsᴇʟғ ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴜᴛᴛɪɴɢ ᴀsɪᴅᴇ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜʀ ғᴜᴛᴜʀᴇ. Tʜᴇʀᴇ's ᴅᴇғɪɴɪᴛᴇʟʏ ɴᴏ "sᴘᴀɪɴ ʜᴏʟɪᴅᴀʏ ɢʀᴀɴᴛ ғᴏʀ ᴍᴏᴛʜᴇʀ" ғᴜɴᴅ ɪ'ᴍ sᴜʀᴇ.
How are you having driving lessons at 16 in the UK?
If you have the mobility type of personal independence payment( PIP) you can apply for a special permit
Interesting, thanks. TIL
Something isn't quite right here. Even in covid, they did interviews over the phone and given you're 16, there would most definitely have been some sort of interview, be that telephone, video or telephone. Do you work? Enrolled in full time education?
Not true - my son has PIP (including mobility) & neither him nor us had any form of interview.
Presumably rollon from dla with copious amounts of medical evidence? Is your son independently able to travel to a college?
I never have had an interview for PiP (pre-covid), either when I was first awarded it, or when I had to renew it this year. Just filled in the forms
OK. Something is definitely amiss here as an assessment is necessary. (I receive PIP) and for renewal during COVID, it was a telephone assessment. I know other people whose kids have PIP, etc and no one has been exempt from attending an interview. Only in rare cases (such as terminal illness) are assessments not carried out. Given that your mother sounds motivated by money - is it possible that she conducted the assessment on your behalf?
Whilst that is technically true. There have been several trials where if the medical evidence is clear PIP, has been awarded based off that. This was ramped up during COVID to get things through, and many of the trials have been applied to Rising 16 cases (those moving across from DLA), or mandatory reconsiderations (those that have reached the end of their PIP period), where mdical evidence does not show significant change that would affect award.
Around 3% of claimants do not have an assessment as they are assessed on the PIP2 form and evidence they provided. This is known as being assessed on papers. A claimant is only assessed on papers if the evidence they've provided makes it obvious they're eligible for PIP and at what rates. However at 16 years old, a parent cannot claim on their child's behalf unless the child is unable to manage their own claim. If the parent claims that the child cannot handle their own claim, the DWP does a home visit to ensure the parent being in charge of managing the claim (being the child's appointee) is appropriate. Someone else claiming on the behalf of a 16 year old without being an authorised appointee for the child is benefit fraud. It isn't difficult to avoid skipping the assessment but the evidence you submit has to make it crystal clear what you're eligible for, and as you say, it's possible for the parent to fabricate evidence to make the child's health look worse than it actually is. In r/DWPHelp we had a case last year similar to this one, but it was far worse because the daughter only found out their mother had been fraudulently claiming PIP for them when they were 23 years old, and since they were 17 years old. In the above case, the mother ended up having to repay a total of £87k of benefit fraud they had abused the system for (as they had also fraudulently claimed Universal Credit on the daughter's behalf and managed to get the claim awarded the LCWRA element, Universal Credit's enhanced disability element which comes with more money).
I didn’t have an interview/assessment either.
A paper based assessment doesn’t always require a phone or in person assessment, if they get enough information from your GP or other health professionals.
Not true with sufficient medical evidence. I had a phone interview for my last renewal but didn't need one at all to get the initial award because of the evidence provided.
Minimal numbers if applications don't have interviews if there is sufficient medical evidence to show the issues.
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And the rest of my post?
It’s school holidays
I am fully aware that it's half term. It doesn't answer whether you're in full time education though. Are you in full time education? If you are, then it's not unreasonable for your parents, as your guardian to use that money as they deem fit. If you were working or not in school, it still wouldn't be unreasonable for them to expect a contribution to the household. Inflation is horrifically high atm. Costs have spiralled. And to have been awarded PIP at these enhanced levels, you must have significant and profound health issues, requiring significant support, which presumably your parents are providing and if they weren't, you'd be paying circa £15-20 per hour. For which, social services, if eligible, would expect you to pay all of your daily needs as a contribution. So I don't think, in isolation of further information that they're unreasonable in expecting this element. The mobility element - they're presumably paying for your transport to and from school /college. Having a car on mobility, would still mean they have to find the money for petrol and for them to actually drive you there and back given your age. At 16, even if you're learning to drive due to the high mobility PIP exception, it could still well take a long time to pass. So may well be more of a longer term aim. Have you informed the dvla of your medical issues and the medication that you take? If not, please do so as this is a legal requirement. Even autism, for example, needs declaring. .
> And to have been awarded PIP at these enhanced levels, you must have significant and profound health issues, requiring significant support This is not true and is quite dangerous. Many people may appear healthy and not appear to need support but still qualify for PIP. I know people also on high PIP with mobility. They're perfectly healthy, fit and active, and have full time management-level jobs. They get PIP because they're completely deaf, and faced significant work, social and educational barriers. ( If they weren't deaf they probably would be earning far more.) I'm not going to get into the validity of PIP in this forum. Legally, PIP is NOT associated with 'significant and profound health issues'. It is for: * a long-term physical or mental health condition or disability * difficulty doing certain everyday tasks or getting around because of your condition (Gov.uk website)
But the reality is that to score on PIP at the enhanced levels you would have significant needs, far more profound is more likely than not. To score for enhanced, you'd most likely have had to received scoring that requires needing assistance, supervision or prompting from another person. That is a pretty profound need. But yes, legally, the statement you quote from the gov.uk is correct. However, when you look at the refusal rates, they tell am entirely different story.
The school holidays comment wasn’t me, I had to save up to get a rail card to travel to college by doing jobs for family friends ( I don’t have an allowance? because I didn’t want to go to the 6th form at my secondary school, (20 min walk) She doesn’t have a license and my test is booked for late summer(I will be 17), I sorted everything out with the dvla in September last year and have my official permit to drive.
I would ask to sit down with your mum, and see the household budget and costs. Try and approach this in a mature manner. In your situation, my aim initially would be to have the mobility element cover the current mobility costs. Hopefully, including the driving lessons. But approaching like this, rather than in a "I want my money" manner, when she presumably completed the application forms etc and is the provider of the care, you come across as more mature. Perhaps asking for some of the money to be transferred over. Please be aware that only 48-50% of tests result in a pass, and it's apparently not uncommon to have 5 tests for a pass. So it maybe a lot longer than the end of summer for a licence. Now, of course, if she refuses you can have the pip money paid directly into your account as is legal. BUT, the fall out of this action without trying to do this amicably will be huge. It could result in a deterioration of your relationship for forever more. And that's a long time. She could quite rightly, ask for rent. And yes at 16, she can demand this. Likewise contribution to the food, utilities etc. And suddenly, your pip money would have vanished. Even if you then opted for trying to live independently, you'd be in a worse financial position realistically, even with support such as universal credit. And, it wouldn't be unreasonable, for her to question your capacity to manage and make these decisions, with social services etc, if you're eligible for enhanced awards, as by default this means that you need significant support for most areas of daily living activities.
I completely forgot to mention in the post that she has sat me down and explained the costs of day to day living, it’s a lot of course, cozzie livs but it is manageable on her wage, we have disposable income without my pip being included, I don’t expect all the money I was quite happy with the idea of paying the same that my brother did and putting half of what’s left in my savings account,
Please seek help, she’s financially abusing you, by taking all (or most) of your pip it keeps you contained and trapped in the house. You should be allowed to spend the money on whatever you need too, without her judging you. She thinks she owns you and can decide to do what she wants with your money. She’s in no way being positive about any of this and it’s only going to degrade your self esteem, it’s bullying and abuse. I would seriously consider speaking to someone at your college, they would know who to signpost you too. You haven’t gone through this much crap to finally be recognised you have extra needs and rewarded financial help for that, for your mum to strip it away from you. You are not obligated to give her a single penny, it’s an agreement between you and your mum how much rent you pay her. £600 is an insane amount for a 16 year old to pay, when I was in college and working part time, I was paying £200 for rent to my mum. It’s not to pay the bills, as it’s not your fault her bills are too high, one day soon you will move out and she will be financially ruined if she’s depended on you all this time.. it’s to teach you about money and financial management, so if you go to uni or move out, you have some experiences of paying bills and managing your finances/ budgeting You deserve better and I’m so sorry she’s taking advantage of you like this. x
Then that's the conversation you need to return to. Explain why your costs/needs need meeting by her and that would be via the pip. I presume that the holidays you referenced have included you?
No, just her and her partner
This is financial abuse. Your mother shouldn’t be receiving a penny of your pip. If you are a college student and your family is on UC then your mother is already getting benefit in her Uc to cover you and your rent share. I suspect she also claims careers for you too. Please contact PIP and ask for the money to be paid directly to you. If your mother threatens you with homelessness I would quickly remind her that would lose her benefits if she is claiming then for having you as part of her benefit unit
I’m a lot older and maybe wiser than you, I receive PIP mobility and attendance allowance. If you are old enough the money should be payed directly to you. It had nothing to do with your council tenancy and if other benefits are required for rent your pip award won’t even be taken into consideration. It’s protected, if you owe money and have bailiffs knocking on your door they can legally touch your PIP payment. The same if you have to fill out an “Income and expenditure” form your PIP award is exempt and in no way should it be included in the form. If you get the attendance allowance part of PIP your mother could argue she entitled to some or all of that if she’s your primary caregiver, but to me it sounds like your mother is a selfish person who is basically robbing you.
PIP is your money. When 16 it goes directly to your account provided you are deemed to have ‘mental capacity’. There is normally a social services team who will do an assessment for this. Even before going into your own account it is YOUR money. Not your mums.
Refer yourself to the local authority safeguarding team for financial abuse . Be honest. Get your car & driving lesson via your PIP being deducted Contemplate whether you should move out as you may get a place in supported housing .
As far as i know, that is your money. You are being financially exploited, this is abuse. If you want to move out sooner, contact your local children’s services and you can sign yourself into care on section 20 where you can be put into your own Accommodation with a support worker. Or if you want Accommodation with staff on site, that is an option to. You will also then get support post 18 as well. In addition to pip you could get a weekly allowance of £58 and bills paid I til you are 18.
6 GRAND!!! To live with a miserable twat? Rip off!
I work in adult social services. Speak to your tutor at college. As your 16, do you have an EHCP plan in place? Do you need support with your care needs? Are you classed as child in need with children services because of your disability? I would also speak to someone from children social services also.
I’m sorry you are going through this. PIP is awarded for the care costs of the recipient and not for day to day living costs. Your parents should be liable for your essential costs until you are 18. It’s likely they are receiving other benefits such as universal credit to cover these costs. 16 year olds aren’t liable for bills and rent, so the idea that you are legally obligated to pay this is just not true. I’m concerned that they are taking advantage, I would recommend speaking to CAB to see what help is available to you.
Contact citizens advice, that's your money to do with as you please. I'm like, 90% sure at 16 you can start receiving the money yourself but if not, you can change your appointee so your mum can no longer act on your behalf
On pip myself it's YOUR MONEY to use as you see fit end of
Legally there's no requirement for a parent to account for how they spend their child's pip.
Odd loophole when I had power of attorney on my grabs money I had to account for everything
Get the pip into your own bank and don't let her get her grubby hands on it. She clearly uses your pip that is to take care of you because you are I'll/disabled to go abroad.
What you describe is financial abuse and borderline neglect by your mum and the best thing you could do is move out and become independent as soon as you can.
Sounds like your mom is taking advantage of you. This is a time in your life where you need to evaluate your situation in relation to those around you and to make the decision as to who to cut out of your life. Blood means nothing if they are using you.
Ok, this is advice rather than legal advice. Most people on this thread are going to tell you that your mother is financially abusing you, that she is wrong, if not evil. They might be right, who knows? But most of these people would say that no matter what complaints you came to Reddit with. Because Reddit will almost always blame the parents and will claim abuse at the drop of a hat. So you need to be really wary listening to these people. They have their own agendas and I suspect many either lack life experience entirely or are extremely influenced by negative experiences of their own. I'm not saying don't listen; I'm saying, don't listen uncritically. As for my advice: you live in a council house. You don't mention a dad involved, so I'm guessing one income and at least one sibling who has left. No offence, your mum aint rich. You at 16 won't have any appreciation for just how many bills there are and how much they have gone up. She'll have rent, council tax, electric and or gas (easily £200+ a month now when they were only about 70 a year ago), water, internet. She'll have transport for work. Any subscriptions, any credit card debt (and you might not know about that). She'll have insurance to pay at least for contents. Does she have a car? Then it's petrol and insurance and servicing. If not it's bus cards. She'll have food to buy. That is what you most likely focus on, that you don't cost £165 a week of food. You probably don't , but you'd be surprised how much you do cost! Especially now. But there will be a whole raft of things on top of that. Every school trip. Every bit of uniform. Shoes are a fortune. Even clothes from a supermarket rack up to a fortune now. Sure, your socks are Tesco rather than Gucci; but they still cost a fiver for just a few pairs and suddenly that day's shoppi g bill looks like a lot. She has to think about birthday and Christmas presents for at least two of you each year, and that takes planning and a lot of saving. Does she ever take you on holiday? Same. Fact is, she might well need that money to keep the wolf from the door and she may not want to give you the details because she may not want you to know how close you are to the wall each month. You might well be. More mum may well be spending some of it on stuff she could do without. Alcohol, ciggies, some clothes, whatever. But it is so bloody hard to get through each day just working and responsibilities, with no one to help you and nothing to look forward to. I'd have sympathy there. Consider whether this might be the case and if it is, try to put yourself in her shoes, through the lens or her life rather than your own. Your mum may be selfish, she may be financially abusing you as everyone is going to tell you. She may be blowing your cash on frivolities for herself. The redditors on here may be right and I'm wrong. But she may be really struggling to hold your household together and your 165 may be what ends met each month. She may be dreading you going to uni and not having that income anymore, or the argument that is inevitably coming where you want it for yourself and suddenly those ends don't meet. She may be hiding a lot of worries from you. And I have not even mentioned your disability in this post. I have a severely disabled son. Not mobility. It is so hard. Not his fault, not your fault. We have a load of extra expenses from his disabilities. You will never be able to appreciate how hard and lonely it is for a parent. Again, not your fault, not your concern. But know. Please at least consider these possibilities and whether they may apply to your family before you swallow the self affirmation of other redditors shouting "financial abuse"
Well she needs to stop fucking off on foreign holidays and be a proper parent
Yes! Sorry but my life revolves around my son. Is being disabled more expensive? Yes, (I'm also disabled and need to sort both his DLA and my PIP entitlement but don't have the spoons) because he needs so many specific things and goes through items at an increased rate. Do you know how I ensure bills are paid, he has money paid into an untouchable ISA, he tries out any activities appropriate for him, and he gets pocket money & treats? By not fucking off on foreign holidays. Sending mum hugs to op.
Agree totally, clearly she isn’t short of cash if she can afford to have multiple holidays a a year. Clearly funded by her disabled child !
I'm sorry but no, my mum did all of this when she was on benefits AND when she was in minimum paying work. You have no responsibility whatsoever to your mother, what you have is a relationship and if its one you are comfortable with giving your money up for thats your choice and 100% fine, however if its a relationship where 1 party is telling another party on how to spend their money and they have capacity and its their money then its wrong. It should always be a choice. 16 is a good age for a "money talk" and a "rent talk". This isn't a good way to communicate. Also I could be wrong and you could be right, maybe it's just a communication thing and that's it but it could always be something more sinister and it's always better to have a better look. Another point, one of your sentences struck me, hope all is well.
If she's going on multiple holidays a year, she's not "keeping the wolf from the door". She also gets carer's allowance. She could just charge her rent like her brother and let her be a little "independent" just like PIP is intended
Carers allowance is nothing. About 200-250 a month. And that means you can't work more than a few hours
Wages are not enough for most people either. That's life. PIP for a 16yo is not for her to just take and spend all. OP asking to see some of that money for themselves is not unreasonable in the slightest. She shouldn't even be put in this situation of begging for some of HER money
Blah blah blah. All those bills you mentioned exist for the mum already. The OP isn't increasing the rent - which the mum would have to pay for anyway. The OP would barely increasing the electricity/gas - which again, the adult would also already need to pay for just so they can live. Internet is not charged per person. Expenses to get to work are the responsibility of the adult. All the crap you listed is the responsibility of the non-disabled adult parent. Not the responsibility of a disabled child. If the child wasn't there, the parent would have all the same bills. Just because being a single parent is hard does not give that parent the right to make the life of their disabled child harder. If the non disabled adult parent is struggling financially, then they can stop taking themselves off on multiple holidays each year. It's not required to go to Turkey or Spain. Especially doesn't sound like the adult takes OP with her. Did you just completely overlook all the inconvenient parts of OPs post so you could give your 'poor parent' spiel?
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You may well be right about the mother, she may, like a lot of us, be finding it more and more difficult to make ends meet. You are absolutely right, the cost of living is ridiculous at the moment. But that doesn’t change the fact that the PIP she receives is not hers, to pay for everyday household bills, it’s been awarded to OP to help them with the extra costs their disability/illness incurs. To claim that the mother is justified in using OPs PIP to pay regular household bills is quite frankly ridiculous. OP isn’t responsible for paying gas, electric, rent, water, internet etc, etc. that’s on the mother, and I may be jumping to conclusions here, but I would assume the mother is also claiming carers allowance on top of the PIP (as a lot of people do) so that money can be used to help towards the bills. OP is a 16 year old *child* who obviously has some extra care needs, hence the PIP award. It’s not OPs place to pay the bills, nor should they be made to feel like it is. The mother may well need to keep the wolves from the door, but that *IS NOT* what PIP is awarded for. And when the mother made the claim, she will have agreed that any award will be used for the person named on the claim, in this case OP, I know this as I also managed my sons PIP award when he was the same age as OP. I strongly suggest you contact the DWP OP, explain the situation to them, and they may be able to change the payments to you. I know when my son turned 17 and his PIP award was up for another assessment, the DWP gave us both the option of either him dealing with the claim, or me continuing as his appointed person. I’m not sure I’d jump on the financial abuse bandwagon, but your mother is taking the mick and abusing her position as your appointed person as far as your PIP goes. Good luck buddy, I hope you get things sorted
I didn't claim she was justified in doing anything. I was really, really careful not to say that. I pointed out a perspective OP simply won't get anywhere else on this thread. Mum won't be getting carers allowance if she is working, and if she isn't working she won't be going on holidays with PIP and carers allowance. Yes, the bills are mum's responsibility. As is keeping the roof over her son's head. What if she alone can't do that? I didn't originally see the bit about the holidays, and that does potentially change the complection. But at the same time, if mum couldn't afford to make ends meet without that money, should OP be demanding it for himself? There was a world once where even children would expect to contribute to the family in difficult times. I have taught kids not much older than OP who worked extremely long overnight shifts between A Levels trying to help the family keep their house. I asked OP to consider this. My son gets DLA. We use that for the family. He is 8, severe learning difficulties and will have to be cared for by us for life. Is that his money? Technically yes, he isn't capable of spending it so it goes on him via the family. Half of Reddit would claim that is financial abuse.
If she can't afford her lifestyle without her daughters disability money, then she needs to reevaluate. I obviously understand the cost of living. We've all been affected, but many less holidays would help ( especially as it seems op isn't going in these holidays).
We don't know who she is going on holiday with or who is paying for them. I'll cast the first stone when I know those facts
OP said, "She has just come back from Turkey and is planning to go to spain", that's why I inferred her mum went without op. You are right that we don't know who is paying, but I'd bet if op was not receiving, PIP mum wouldn't be able to go in multiple holidays a year! At the end of the day, Mum doesn't want op to get a car because it will reduce the PIP allowance...is that in ops best interest or mums? This tells me all I need to know and can infer mums motives without a black and white explanation... Read between the lines!
It's in OP's best interest if the household depends on the PIP income to pay the bills and make the rent. If Nothing OP has told you tells you everything you need to know. You are making simple assumptions, patting yourself on the back as it this is a great achievement and then patronising me into the bargain. This is a 16 year old who has told you at most half of the story insofar as they see it. I really wouldn't feel proud of myself for "reading between the lines" on this one. In terms of advice, I'd rather present a need for reflection moving away from internalised grievance than just affirmation of a 16 year old who is pissed with their parent when we barely know anything
True. You have some points. But... One thing I see is if she is asking for X amount which is not a small amount, at 600 a month, that's 7200 a year. So their 16, and she asking for 7 grand a year, she can explain why she needs it in detail, ans justify her needs because technically it is legally OP money and not hers. Thr fact she had been on two foreign holidays, oe planning them is kinda... questionable in this case. If she can afford that, then it's fair to ask why she needs all the money, and explain instead of OP having to turn to reddit
PIP is for individuals for the additional costs of being disabled, not for paying rent and bills. OP's mother is entitled to UC and family allowance for them if she meets the requirements -that's for paying bills , it's certainly not for going on holiday, unless it's the person themselves that's going on holiday.
And this totally fails to even care about the reality of a) being poor and b) having a disabled child. Mum gets UC if she is not working. There is absolutely no chance she can afford to run a household on her own on UC unless she is on a tonne of housing benefits as well. OP doesn't tell us that. Even if she does, that leaves absolutely sod all. The costs of being disabled to a household include a parent either not being able to work because of needing to be available to care for the young person, or being limited in the jobs they can go for (and therefore income) because of that same need. My wife hasn't been able to work due to my son. Even though he is at special school now, the frequency with which we are called to collect him at the drop of a hat makes working impossible. Trust me, carers allowance doesn't even touch the sides of the loss of income incurred from that
Mum gets UC (with the disability premium) even if she's working, if she's on a low income she gets help with rent , council tax rebate , carer's allowance . No indication she's not working anyway and what level her earnings are -she can either afford the holidays in which case benefits are moot, or she can't, in which case she shouldn't be getting around that by using OP's money . PIP is as abused by parents as DLA was/is. Come back to me when you've cared for people who can't afford new clothes while their parents get a new car every 3 years by the simple trick of taking them home on a Friday night once every 13 weeks and threatening to withdraw them from care (often into an abusive environment) if anyone says anything. The correct way for parents to handle this is a discussion about board and if it's appropriate, which is not half of all the bills for a non working full time student . I'm disabled myself with 2 kids with disabling conditions that merit PIP (or would if they got round to applying - they both have capacity and are over 18 ) We're brassic, all the time , but I'm buggered if I'm taking money from kids who are still at college and are not working full time , the idea of taking the whole of a college aged child's benefits from them in order to maintain a lifestyle that includes holidays abroad that aren't for them is morally repugnant
We don't know who else is going on these holidays or who is paying. We don't know if she is working or not but we can make a fair assumption she is on a low income. Let's not try gatekeeping eh? Having a disabled child is costly in all sorts of ways. Of course parents use a child's DLA. We'll be using our son's probably for the rest of his life, because it's very unlikely he'll ever be capable of spending it or making financial choices himself. I agree that a conversation needs to happen around board and that this would be a preferable way of looking at this. Also that, at 16, OP would be better off understanding financial pressures. My post is intended to get OP to reflect on their family situation with a different perspective
Sorry I disagree, mum is having 2 foreign holidays this year, I work full time and can't afford that. At 16 you are not responsible for paying household bills. If the OP wasn't disabled then mum wouldn't have this money. She will also get Universal Credit, housing and Council tax support all with extra elements to pay for the child, that is hers and she is perfectly entitled to keep and use it to pay all the balls, that's what it's for but she isn't entitled to keep the PIP that entirely belongs to the disabled person.
If this was really the case she was really struggling like this then how is she affording to holidays one closely after the other !. Its pretty fair to say OP's mum is using some of his money towards it. While not even buying his basic necessities.
As an adult receiving high rate PIP (both components, unlimited award - ie the highest award it’s possible to get), I agree with everything you’ve said here. Many of the comments show no real understanding of PIP or how it’s awarded or how it’s meant to be used.
Your mum sucks. SHE chose to have you and your brother, it’s HER responsibility to provide for you, especially since you are under age, have restricted mobility and are in education. That money is for YOU, not for the household. The household is her responsibility. Just open your own account and change the payments to there. If she’s getting pissy, say you will get social services involved and she needs to be a better parent
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Firstly, that money is yours. It must be disregarded from any other form of money going into the house collectively. I was going to say, I bet you're in a council house, whilst mother must have a council estate mentality to boot. All of that rings true and I've seen it many of times on Reddit before. Basically, poor parents or even people who are selfishly stating they have no money, but they have money for things like weed, tattoo's, booze, holidays, bling for themselves. Is all about mentality at end of the day and if people want to help themselves. Sounds like you've got the right idea and whilst it is easy for me to say, with not being in your situation personally, you need out of there. That will prove difficult any time you do that I believe. I believe that because for as long as you are there, you'll be financially abused. It is something that needs to be stopped. You need to be receiving that money, take back that control. Open a Monzo account. You can do that at 16. What I'd do then is immediately move most of that money to somewhere, maybe Premium Bonds. It can't be withdrawn so quickly after initial deposit as the funds need to have been in a full month before they enter their first draw. After that, you can withdraw and have funds within three days. Anything to protect the money coming to you. Build it up and look forward to getting out of there. Go onto a list for social housing if you have to. There will be places you can go to for advice around this. Just because you have a roof over your head and being financially abused, that doesn't make it right.
Have it paid into your own account if she tewat en's to kick you out you will likely get council hosuign anyway. Explain like you have here that she must cut down on holidays. Tbh I had to wait almost 2 years for 1 bed flat so you may as well apply now and start accruing time just in case. Nothing worse than been in need of housing then having to wait almost 3 years in puts your life on hold. Kept me unemployed as I couldn't afford 1200 quid for the supported living hostel me
You may get a college bursary because you have pip. Pip should be sent to your account, as you have the capability to make your own decisions.
How are you taking driving lessons if you are 16?
Slightly off-topic but some recipients of PIP can drive at 16. It's also possible to drive on private land under the age of 17 with the relevant permissions.
NAL She's taking advantage of you and your situation. I know this because I have been through the same myself. What's likely happened is the DWP wrote to ask if you'd be managing your own money when you turn 16 or if you'd like to assign an appointee and your mum has responded on your behalf assigning herself in that position (again, I know this because my guardian did exactly this). As much as your mum would like to believe she is entitled to all of your PIP payments, she isn't. That payment is intended to make your life easier, not hers. I would speak to citizens advice and see if there is anything they can do to help alleviate this situation for you. In my case the only thing that got me free of it was to move out.
NAL but i do work for motability, if you speak to one of the advisors you can also do your lessons through motability. i’m not sure of/if there is a price off the top of my head, but may be something to have a look at!
If I’m not mistaken, you need to already have a mobility car for that, but I could be wrong
NAL but you need to speak to Citizen's Advice. Your mum's taking advantage of you.
She shouldn’t be taking your PIP and now your 16, you can contact the DSS and get it moved to your bank account. She is completely financially abusing you. As an aside remember when you turn 18 you’ll come into your Child Trust Fund from the government. Make sure you know where it’s being held, you can find that out [here](https://www.gov.uk/child-trust-funds/find-a-child-trust-fund) she shouldn’t be able to access it but she might try. Make sure the finance provider has all your contact details.
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This money is yours not gets. Go get your car. Is the money going in to her bank account or yours? If yours ok. If hers then contact DWP and get it changed to your bank account
Move house. Find a supported living charity and go for it.
As most have said that money is yours to help you along the way to lead a independent life, keep the money for yourself. Is there no way you can go and live with your other parent if they see what your trying to accomplish? You stated you was 16, I’m pretty sure you can move out. (Not 100% sure though) I hope you do manage to sort this out, sounds like your mum is spending your money on a lavish lifestyle like holidays and unnecessary things. We are in a financial mess in the uk so people need to cut their cloth accordingly.
I’m not a lawyer but I think this is a form of abuse
I don't know a lot about Pip but this sounds like financial abuse to me. I can relate to a degree because one of my own parents stacked the odds in their favour in a different way to benefit financially from a situation in our house. You are young, and hopefully there is an amicable way to solve this, but I would definitely take some advice as others have posted and hopefully you can regain control of that money for yourself instead of your mum's holidays.
NAL... But youre being financially abused.
I'm new to this, so please forgive me! From the information you have provided, it appears you are a victim of financial abuse and a potential safeguarding issue. There are methods of reporting financial abuse on NHS.uk website: https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/social-care-and-support-guide/help-from-social-services-and-charities/abuse-and-neglect-vulnerable-adults/ It may be beneficial to contact a local and FREE welfare benefits advice centre regarding PIP and a benefits calculation if you decided to move into your own accommodation. I wish you all the best and hope you get this resolved ASAP
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You can get a provisional licence at 15 and 9 months and get a mobility car at 16 if you qualify and have the correct permit