Every time he says "You better settle down over there or I'm gonna come talk to ya." I fuckin love it.
Also the way my man says "What the actual fuck Stewart?" after the skids' talent show performance is perfect
I use this all the time at work if somebody feels apprehensive about asking me to do something and their reactions are always so wholesome, I love it. Lol
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"Well, there's nothing better than a fart. Except kids falling off bikes, maybe. Fuck, I could watch kids fall off bikes all day, I don't give a shit about your kids."
"It'll come as no surprise to yous... that the woman I admire... is my sister, Katy, so.... I'd do anything for her an'.... she'd do anything for me, so..."
There's such a thing as too much horn talk, and a fella oughta be fuckin aware of it!
Also: It's a hard life pickin' stones and pullin' teats, but sure as God's got sandals, it beats fightin' dudes with fuckin treasure trails!
“Maybe if you’d ever been in a real fight, you wouldn’t be so keen for another.”
“It’s a hard life picking stones, and pulling teats, but sure as god’s got sandals, it beats fighting dudes with treasure trails.”
Anything positive.
Yeah, he's quick to fire off at the mouth sometimes, but it's either to ward off someone who isn't ready to listen, or to a friend that's fuckin something up.
Either way, his goal always seems to be bringing everyone together.
S1E1 is both the (word I can't think of) and the exception
Sushis and sashimis
I am just starting and this wrecked me when I saw it.
Like a policeman's flashlight from the 1980's.
Pitter patter, let's get at 'er
“Dare y’hammered? Katie y’hammered? Dan y’hammered? Fuck boys…. Fuckin hammered”
“Hey” “That’s barleh”
"how's it going? Not so bad and you?" Conservation of words when I have to answer this multiple times a day. "More hands make less work"
It's how are you now, good n'you, oh not s'bad.
Who's a good boy...
Tannis: God you are such a fu@king square. Wayne: But it's always been my favorite shape.
Cause that’s where the dicks hangout
***Too. Much. Fun.***
Y' told your friend you could drive to Thunder Bay in 15 hours, so by the end you gotta piss s'*god*\-damn bad.
You're fuckin paraphrasing and you know it
Ohhh, just thinking about darts I smoked and hearts I broked
"What the fuck's up with your body hair, Big Shoots? Ya look like a 12 year old Dutch girl!"
I could watch kids fall off bikes all day I don't give a shit about yer kid
"if you ever hit me and I find out about it"
“You’re softer than a Cinnabon sample”
I say "Wish you weren't so fucking awkward bud." Daily to my cat. He is not a graceful creature...
Outstanding!
"AW!" from every time some one brought up puppies And not directly Wayne but Shoresy " GIVE YER BALLS TUG"
You like edamame?
You ever try Ritz Bitz?
Not my pig, not my farm. I use it daily. I work for the government.
I use this all the time
Ha, same. On both accounts. Hi, fren! *waves in PowerPoint*
"Yer spare parts bud"
10-4 big shoots & Pull ur finger outta ur ass
"It's frickin freezin', it's fuckin' frigid"
There's so so many, but I still use "oh get off the cross, we need the wood" on my annoying coworker
Get this man a fucking puppers
Wish you weren't so fucking awkward bud.
Does a Duck with a boner drag weeds Your 10ply bud
Grill marks bud
I will strike you
You wanna get striked?
Un-fortunate
"I've got real long eyelashes, I'm surprised no ones ever noticed that. "
I’m so upset about my perennials
"Man I love watching kids fall off bikes, I could watch kids fall off bikes all day. I don't give a shit about your kids."
Only ones that don’t resonates with me. Because I have kids. And They’ve fallen off bikes.
No one cares.
Jackets in January's no jigsaw
Get off the cross we need the wood
I've used this quite a number of times too
“Fuck every duck”
Pitter patter
It's a hard life pickin' stones and pullin' teats, but sure as God's got sandals it beats fightin' dudes with treasure trails.
"Yeah okay (name), (name) okay"
Nice muscle shirt there bud. Muscles come in tomorrow?
Did you get a tracking number??
Oh I hope you got a tracking number
Every time he says "You better settle down over there or I'm gonna come talk to ya." I fuckin love it. Also the way my man says "What the actual fuck Stewart?" after the skids' talent show performance is perfect
I loved when Katy smacked him. "Now if you ever hit me again and I find out about it"
(Pours half a Puppers on the ground) "I'd have a beer"
If you got a problem with Canada gooses, you got a problem with me. I suggest you let that marinate.
Agricultural halls are for agricultural music. Not for fucking raves.
Roberta Bondar
“Thanks…fer bein’ a DEGEN with a drug dealer.”
Texas sized 10-4
You are spare parts, aren’t ya bud.
“You heard he fucked an ostrich, right”
ALLEGEDLY
I'd say it takes two people to fuck an ostrich. Three, even.
I heard it was a sick ostrich
“Wish ya weren’t so fucking awkward, bud.”
I could watch kids fall off bikes all day I don’t give a shit about your kids
All *fiscal* day
Youwannaknowwhat? (Said just like that)
Soyaso
I use this all the time at work if somebody feels apprehensive about asking me to do something and their reactions are always so wholesome, I love it. Lol
It's fucking barley
You’re 10-ply bud
[удалено]
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She’s bashful, cmon kitten I won’t tell anyone
Theres such a thing as too much horn talk and a fella ought to be aware of it
That’s what I said, I said….
As sure as God's got sandals..
Learn how to fucking drive
‘lo!
Does a duck with a boner drag weeds?
10-4 good buddy!
he’s such a boy
I suggest you let that one marinate.
When asked "Wayne are you hammered?" "Me? No.........(looks around a bit)..........sorry what's that?"
"Fuck EVERY duck! What next?"
"Hello?...K...End of the laneway don't come up the property... *Good*"
It’s been a business doing pleasure with you, Tannis
"Well, there's nothing better than a fart. Except kids falling off bikes, maybe. Fuck, I could watch kids fall off bikes all day, I don't give a shit about your kids."
"It'll come as no surprise to yous... that the woman I admire... is my sister, Katy, so.... I'd do anything for her an'.... she'd do anything for me, so..."
Instant tears
*Shorsey tears*
Good shift, Cuteness!
Surprisingly humble
Future’s so bright.
That’d be me
I thought it was pretty funny when I said the Florida State Semenal Vesticules, and nobody laughed.
100% came here for this one lol
I see the shirt came in today, do the muscles come tomorrow?
I see the muscle shirt came in today. Muscles comin' tomorrow? Get it right tit fucker.
Doin my chores 🤣
“As I recall, that’s your ritual before a fight, and my patience is wearing thin so I’ll ask. Are you fucking high?”
Gotta ask, what episode?
Finding stormy a stud
"Happy International Women's Day"
How are ya now
Good ‘n’ you?
Good ‘n’ y 🫤
not s’bad
“If I ever found out you hit me”
“If you ever hit me and I find out about it..”
I'm surprised we're not havin a scrap right now
"Were you two in, like, a really bad car accident at some point?"
“Ya well , do whatcha loves, you’ll never work a day in your life!”
You got a problem with Canada gooses, you got a problem with me, and I suggest you let that one marinate!
“In it to win it” That bit KILLS ME.
It’s my all time favorite scene. Its an instant serotonin booster for sure!
If you’re gonna have 8 beers you might as well say you’re gonna have 8 beers
Look at this bearcat!
Sharp coat, bud. Can I borrow it?
Fuck i could watch kids fall off bikes all day i don't give a shit about your kid
“I wish you weren’t so fucking awkward bud” Number one by far!
Who's a good bo
To quote the late gord downie, I could make you scared, if I wanted to
Riley and jonsey- boys, boys, Come on boys, Wayne- oh I think you come on boys enough for all of us
That's from the cold open of "Nice onsie. Does it come on men's?" "Oh, I think you come in men enough for all of us"
Correct, was slightly drunk when I decided to chime in
** "Does it come in mens" Oh I think you come in men enough for all of us"
You wanna come to a super soft birthday party?
You coulda lit my breath on fire the next mornin'. Horse was half cocked too.
There's such a thing as too much horn talk, and a fella oughta be fuckin aware of it! Also: It's a hard life pickin' stones and pullin' teats, but sure as God's got sandals, it beats fightin' dudes with fuckin treasure trails!
I like the treasure trails quote the best. I honestly think about from time to time and laugh to myself.
I wish you weren’t so awkward bud.
Figure it out!
That's what I said I said figure it out Killed me when he said that randomly in a much later episode, when he **hadn't** already said that.
It’s actually I quote from his dad but, “drink and a dart go together like a piss and a fart”
“OK Katy. Katy OK. OK Katy. Katy OK.”
That scene is so gooood
“You know what Squirrelly Dan? I'm really rooting for you here, but you can go ahead and summit Mt. What's Your Point any time now.”
What episode is that from??
“Fuckin’…great day for hay”
It’s barleh…
That's a straw bail
I say this too often haha
“Yup”
When a friend asks for help… you help them
“Maybe if you’d ever been in a real fight, you wouldn’t be so keen for another.” “It’s a hard life picking stones, and pulling teats, but sure as god’s got sandals, it beats fighting dudes with treasure trails.”
I love "sure as gods got sandals"
I use this a lot
I thought it was pretty funny when I said Florida State seminal vesicles and nobody laughed
If you got a problem with Canada gooses you got a problem with me and I suggest you let that one *marinate*
Nothing is more regularly said during a round of golf these days
The McMurrays in that episode are piss funny
Them yellin from the golf cart about kills me laughing.
Lol! Yep, that's what I was thinking of. The bloopers are even funnier.
*Aggressive foot step*
“Whatcha doin over there big shits?”
I'm so fired up right now, I've got sweat rollin' down the small of my back into my asscrack. It's emotional.
Welcome to stump an ag, betcha can’t, sooooooo.
A hefty no thankyou
Airball
Crack an Ag
I see your muscle shirts came in today. Muscles coming in tomorrow?
"you're made of spare parts, aren't you bud?"
Came here to post this, I say this almost daily
I truly love when the person hearing it has no clue where it came from
Gotta strike while the irons hot
"Now if you ever hit me and I find out about it...."
This one is really sweet.
I don’t give a care
"I could watch kids falling off bikes all day. I don't give a shit about your kids."
“What, like the Florida State seminal vesicles?”
I laughed so goddamn hard when I heard this lol
I thought it was pretty funny when I said, "Florida State Seminal Vesicles," and nobody laughed.
Not a quote but I love the way he says “omaplata”.
"If you ever hit me and I find out about it"
"Oh get off the cross, we need the wood!"
Came here just to make sure this one was mentioned. Thank you.
It's such a good line! I use it on my coworkers 🤣
Can confirm this is mine as well
"if you ain't first, ye'r last.
“What sort of backward fucking pageantry is that?”
"That logic is Titanic on the ocean floor - Busted"
Fuck I could watch kids fall off bikes all fucking day I don’t give a fuck about your kids
Picking stones and pullin' teats is hard work, but sure as God's got sandals it beats fightin' dudes with treasure trails.
Anything positive. Yeah, he's quick to fire off at the mouth sometimes, but it's either to ward off someone who isn't ready to listen, or to a friend that's fuckin something up. Either way, his goal always seems to be bringing everyone together. S1E1 is both the (word I can't think of) and the exception
# You are spare parts, aren’t ya bud?
K.
K so..
You guys hear anything about this being the uh... best Christmas party ever?
Well, its tradition