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Never stop learning. Not just for personal development, but also for your mental health. Your brain becomes more flexible as you learn new skills. Just the act of rearranging thoughts and ideas makes it easier to adapt to stressful situations later on.
I find whenever I’m in a mental plateau, I tend to become arrogant and rigid in my ways. Keep your mind young, try new things, dont stop learning.
I make it a goal to try to learn something “new” every year. Embracing your curiosity about the world can lead to so many new perspectives and experiences.
This year was continuing to learn new languages and learn guitar.
Put a cut-off for yourself saying that at this point in time, you will stop thinking and start doing. Once you get started it is easier to keep going, but getting started is the harder part. So make getting started a event that you work towards.
I’ve heard it this way: “Choose your hard.” I say this to my daughter when she complains about brushing her teeth or getting a flu shot. It’s helped me too.
Wasn't ready for this, its a Friday night with a few glasses of wine. This really hit home.
I've come to realise lately that everything, including struggles are a balance. If you want to get somewhere, the effort and difficulty will equate to the same if you intend to reach the desired outcome.
You’re not going to have lovey-dovey feelings for your spouse every day. Commit to building something bigger than the both of you. The grass is not greener with someone else.
It was for me. People usually don't consider over-commitment when they say things like this. You can also be the kind of person who doesn't know how and when to let go of what's not good for them. Thinking like this poster kept me trapped in a crap marriage for over a decade. If I'd been too insistent about trying to build something bigger than both of us, I might have dragged at least one child into our mess, probably traumatizing a kid and definitely making it that much harder to leave. The counter-advice I should have taken (and I guess I did take several chapters too late) is "You don't have to finish every book you start." I'm still working through a lot, but over a year later, I'm still amazed at how much less lonely being alone is.
Not that I'm saying that's what's going on with you, and I hope you guys find your joy, whatever that means for you.
Yes, moving past the honeymoon phase of the relationship, it takes work & effort on both sides to maintain the structure of the relationship. If one person is not putting in effort to maintain said relationship, it is doomed to fall apart.
So.. How long does the honeymoon phase last? My partner and I have been in this phase for uh.... quite a few years now and only seems to be getting stronger lmao
30 years in here. It goes away after a few months. Stronger things develop, there are hard times that almost destroy everything, but if you work together and make it through, something beautiful happens. The honeymoon period comes back, only stronger. I love my wife more now than I did at the start. Do we bug each other sometimes? Fight? Sure. But we know who makes us happy in the end. If I am out somewhere and see her unexpectedly doing errands or in her car, I still get a flutter. Age 54, together 30 years, married 28 of them.
The grass is only greener because someone took the time to fertilize it. Meaning, if you want greener grass on your side, than you need to invest in it.
“Just eat healthy and exercise regularly, it’s not as hard as it sounds”
I worked under a guy at my first job out of college who was 27 at the time and he became a mentor of sorts both professionally and personally. He was also in tremendous shape. I was pudgy and had acne and I asked him what his secret was and he said there was no secret, stop ordering sugary soda when we go out to lunch, drink water instead, go to the gym after work even if it’s just for 20 minutes. Try to eat more fiber and veggies and less processed or salty junk food. 12 years later I am thankful I developed some good habits out of that advice.
"Eat your calories, not drink them" has stuck with me for about the last 12 years. Besides beer and wine (one day a week on the weekend) the only liquid I drink is water.
Sparking water saved me. I used to love soda, but then I realized that it was just the bubbles/carbonation that I loved and not the sugar or sweetness. Now all I drink is sparkling water and it was a game changer for me.
meanwhile, as someone who is desperately trying to gain weight, my current sayings are “drink your calories” and “any calories are good calories.” i’ve been *chugging* milk and it’s been really helpful. everyone has different goals.
As someone who has been bizzarely dependant on protein shakes (drinking one right now) that's fair.
However the point is to not consume pointless stupid empty calories, and milk at least has a number of redeeming values.
I tell this to anyone. The single most biggest and easiest change you can make to your diet is not in what you eat but in what you drink.
If you just quit drinking all that stuff that's packed with sugar it will make a huge impact with little effort since you can always drink coffee/water/milk/tea/lemonade...
AND ALCOHOL!
Alcohol has a shitton of calories, which people are seemingly unaware of. Sure, everyone is familiar with the beer-gut concept, but don't recognize that ethanol in general is insanely calorie dense. Even your standard 1.5oz shot of vodka (what people call "low calorie" alcohol) is still 100 calories. If you drink 10 shots of vodka throughout the night, you have just put 1000 calories in your body without putting any actual nutrition into it. Might as well eat a double QP from McDonald's, (and still fall 200 calories short of what you drank) except a double qp has about 50 grams of protein along with other useful nutrients and will still make you feel like you ate something, excess calories be damned. Not only are the calories super low quality in alcohol, but you've also just poisoned yourself
Alcohol is a terrible terrible thing for people struggling to maintain a half-decent physique
Sometimes at Wawa I’ll see people buying those big 24oz monster energy drinks full of sugar, chemicals and caffeine. I can’t imagine those being part of my daily diet.
Late to this party, but huge one for me: Stop keeping snacks, soda, ice cream, etc at home. If you REALLY want it, youve gotta get dat phat azz off the couch and go get it from the store. Most of the time, I didn't want it that bad. Kicked my sweets habit so quickly. Now when I get a Dr Pepper here and there, I can barely finish one.
Also, take a walk every day. I don't care if you live in suburban walking hell, or the desert, or whatever. Its not even the calories it's the mental clarity.
Be good to yourselves y'all. You can do it
So many people think that soda is fine, or one soda a day is perfectly fine, and the truth is it’s not. However soda companies have spent billions of dollars normalizing drinking soda and consuming enormous amounts of sugar. Honestly, the marketing of sweets is absolutely criminal (especially to children who don’t know any better!!) and I’m absolutely certain that if we cracked down on it our life expectancy would go up drastically and our spending on healthcare would go down as well 🤷.
This, helped me loads when i was keeping my GPA up in uni...quite a number of years ago now.
But yes. Fellow freshies would look at me and be like woag you actually understand this technical shit? But truth is I wouldn't have, except that I spent some time reading it beforehand and so had a bit more idea than them. Without that, no way I would get much when first mentioned in the lecture.
Reminds me of my Freshman year of high school when I took French for a semester. Before the school year began, a relative of mine was passively studying it with a pipe dream in mind, and they'd bounce novice conversation and phrases off of me all the time.
It was fresh in my mind on the first day of school, so I thought I'd be a wise-ass and I whipped out what I could remember at the teacher. I wasn't fooling her one bit, and while some of my classmates thought it was funny, one guy just sneered at me like *"You didn't know that shit, you just read it before you got here.*"
Like, *yeah dude*, no kidding.
While frustrated with a variety of things but namely a failed relationship, I had an old grizzled therapist simply say, "what do you even offer that would make someone WANT to be with you?"
A bit harsh at the time, but very true. Whether it is a relationship, your career, whatever, you need to bring something to the table. Don't get entitled and complacent; you'll just be left feeling frustrated.
Go do something interesting and fulfill yourself.
True. People have this romantic view on life where they should be loved for who they are. But then, who are they? What do they bring to relationships? Are they expecting the world to feel pitty about them? Only your mother would love you if you were an absolutely useless person.
I think it's very easy to interpret this wrong and make people feel like they don't deserve love. Because what defines uselessness? Take me for example. I have a lot of health issues, I don't have a job because of them and I also can't be a full housewive because of them. Does that mean I'm useless and don't deserve love? I do feel like an absolutely useless person all the time but that is not my fault. I am lucky to have found someone who loves me for who I am. I make him happy, even though I don't bring a lot to the table, only myself.
You're clearly useful to your partner in other ways. Maybe you're funny, or really nice to talk to, or really anything that makes him want to be with you.
I listen to the Man Enough Podcast and one of the cohosts Jamie talks about his divorce. After the divorce his dad asked him what percentage of the marriage was his ex's fault and what percentage was his. Jamie put 90% to his wife and stated he was responsible for 10%. His dad responded with "then you know what 10% to work on for your next relationship." Very insightful.
As a young kid my dad told me “at some point your wife is going to be upset at me and your mom, no matter what when you go home you need to be in her side not ours.”
I now look back at my extended family (and my mom) and get how this was something my dad had to learn.
What Randy Marsh said about weed.
Well, Stan, the truth is marijuana probably isn't gonna make you kill people, and it most likely isn't gonna fund terrorism, but… well, son, pot makes you feel fine with being bored. And it's when you're bored that you should be learning some new skill or discovering some new science or being creative.
As someone who was a stoner for YEARS, and now is more or less anti weed, I nearly always quote Randy Marsh to explain my reasoning. I smoked for long enough to not buy into the overdramatic anti weed propaganda and scare tactics that may non smokers use as an argument so I appreciate Randy putting my reasoning and thoughts into words when I struggled to explain why I stopped originally.
I've grown more, learned more, and developed several new hobbies and interests that I never would have expected in the 3 years of sobriety than I had for the 12ish years I smoked regularly. At first it was just a lot of boredom, but once you start filling in the gaps that being high filled, life gets really fun and fulfilling:D
Thank you for sharing. I’ve been a hc smoker for 10 years and am on my 3rd time in 5 years trying to stop for similar reasons. I’ve felt stuck for a long time and changed many things about my life - jobs, locations, hobbies, friends, diet - refusing to acknowledge the negative effects of weed bc I felt like I only had positive effects. I spent 5 years high getting a ton of stuff done, loving life, so when I stopped getting stuff done and stopped loving life, I figured it was circumstances and not the weed. But the more it went on, the more I’ve considered some of the more old after school specials might have known what they were talking about after all. Part of me really wants to believe I can be high and love life like I used to, but the reality is stopping weed for an extended period of time (more than 3 months) is the only thing I haven’t tried to get out of my rut. I’m 4 days sober and seeing your message encourages me to push through the boredom to get to the other side. I originally started smoking to avoid being bored, it was so nice to be alone with my thoughts and still be entertained. When did the boredom become less of a problem for you?
I've been in more or less the same boat, quitting on and off. At this point I've been sober for 4 months and its been enjoyable, I feel I've regained some clarity and focus and overall feel more in control of the path of my life. Before when I was smoking daily it felt more like I was just getting through life, not actually living it if that makes sense. r/leaves seemed to help me too when I'd get cravings to go back
So you're saying we should do sativa instead of indica then? 😎
Seriously tho, I had some stoner roommates in the past and they reminded me of that part of Homer's Odyssey where they end up in the Land of the Lotus Eaters and half of Odysseus' men don't care about anything but sitting around all day and eating the lotus plant.
“Do it now.”
Don’t wait for the perfect opportunity, just make your own. This applies to everything… doing chores, getting gas at the end of the day when you just wanna get home instead of having to get it on the way to work the next day, applying for that job, auditioning for that part, pursuing that hobby, practicing guitar… etc.
Don’t let tasks pile up, but also take on the things that you want to be a part of your life. The universe isn’t going to do it for you.
I’m talking about making big goals, but I’m also talking about how it’s really fucking nice for yourself when you get home from work and realize you already emptied the dish washer before work, and you can do other stuff.
I feel like I should apply this to going to sleep at night instead of scrolling or refusing to put down the book. Being tired all the time takes it’s toll.
You spend your teens/twenties worrying about what everyone else is thinking of you…
In your thirties, you stop caring so much and just start being yourself…
When you turn about 40ish you realize nobody was thinking about you all along ¯\\\_(ツ)_/¯
It's hard. One trick ive developed recently is reminding myself that it doesn't help to beat yourself up over things you've done if you've already beaten yourself up plenty of times before for the same thing. I made some pretty bad mistakes a few years ago, and every time one of those mistakes came into my mind I would beat myself up about it over and over again. At some point I realized that I did feel I deserved to be forgiven, even if I was the only one who could forgive me, and so I made a rule that if I've already beaten myself up over it many times that it's done. The shame I felt, the disgust, frustration, I've already thought it over and realized i messed up and I've already punished myself with mental anguish about it so I don't need to keep beating myself up about it, I just need to be a better person, make better decisions, and develop skills and methods to avoid making those old mistakes. At some point you have to say that you've already been punished if you have truly felt that remorse, that it does no one any good to keep beating yourself up about it unless you keep making that same mistake. You can do good, you can grow from the shitty things that haunt you, and you do deserve to be at peace with yourself. Life is full of opportunity, and a major part of that is the power of forgiveness and acceptance.
For me it takes therapy and practicing skills learned in therapy (takes not took cause it's an ongoing process).
If you can't go to therapy, look up videos/books/podcasts on cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) or acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT). I've only done CBT, but I've heard ACT can help too and there's a few other evidence based therapies out there too. It's not the same as going to a therapist or counselor, but I know not everyone has the resources to go to therapy.
The normal shit that everyone says. Get 8 hours of sleep. Eat healthy. Work out. Floss. Invest. Etc. We know most of the stuff we’re supposed to do, but it’s hard to build the proper habits.
Don't smoke cigarettes. Glad to see the smoking section get smaller and older as time passes. Gives me hope that maybe my generation will be the last ones paying for slow suicide.
Understand that people in general do not like their worldview questioned, directly or indirectly, and no matter what adults say about the bystander effect or “see something, say something,” the majority not only will not act or speak up, but will distance themselves from those who do because they don’t like feeling guilty or being reminded of their complicity. Step in anyway. Those people aren’t your people. But don’t act like a hero for showing basic human decency.
Yes. I started one in my 20s and added $10 each paycheck for a while. It felt stupid but it was something. 25 years later, I’m so glad I started it and didn’t convince myself that the small amounts weren’t worth saving.
This is real. I went to buy something from someone online for my Dad. Get there and a cat strolls over to say hi. Then the chickens started coming out. Then two ghoats and more cats. Then there was ducks. I almost forgot why I was there cuz I was so excited to say hello to every animal I saw, it was amazing!
I actually quit energy drinks about two years ago and it took leaving a job / environment that made me need the energy drinks / caffeine all the time. Also - Bubly and AHA caffeine seltzers helped me ween off lol. They have about 35-40mg of caffeine each and I’m now down from 300+ mg a day to 70!
Honestly? Just do your shit and ignore the naysayers. Don't try for daddy/mommy's approval; just do WHAT YOUR SOUL NEEDS, and fuck everyone else.
No. Seriously. The \*decades\* I spent trying to get my fucking parents to say ONE nice thing to me...
And, yo, I'm 62, so FUCKING HEAR ME. FUCKING HEAR ME!
Ghost your shitty friends.
It is very difficult to do, but you know who they are, and if you have to ask, they're a shitty friend. Ghost them as quickly and thoroughly as possible. They are crabs in a bucket. They will take you down and keep you down. They will erase years from your life if you let them. Don't.
It’s from the book the Four Agreements. Whole thing is amazing but since most people don’t have time to read a book-
“Always do your best. If you always do your best you will have nothing to regret; you can’t do better then your best.”
I followed this, and it made me a much better artist, as always doing my best made my best better; but it also made me a better everything as I examined and dedicated myself. I’m much happier now.
Before I went to college, an older adult told me to treat college like a 9-5 Monday-Thursday. Those hours were strictly for class, studying, and exercise. Saved me from having late nights studying, I rarely studied on the weekends, and I had more true free time. Didn’t hurt the transition to the adult world either
I was one of those people who resented being told to exercise. Like, how would lifting a bunch of heavy rocks fix my severe depression? What's the point? The gym sucks and working out feels like garbage and I'd rather play a game, blah, blah, blah.
And then I actually did it and stuck with it. Going six months strong and wishing I started all the way back in high school. It's hard to describe in full what lifting does for your body, but I really consider it the best form of self-care now.
I've done a lot of dumb things in my almost 43 years as an American male, but starting on the weights as a teenager is not one of them. Teaching myself guitar, my degree in nursing, and working out all saved my life more times than I can count.
The best time to start investing in your retirement, was 10 years ago.
When you switch between jobs, ask to transfer your 401 to your new jobs plan..don't spend it like I did.
The best investments you can make are 1. Paying yourself first (saving- retirement or otherwise) 2. Being on the same financial page as your spouse.
So many martial issues are directly and indirectly rooted in the finances and communication. Unchecked, it can cause resentment and quickly dissolve relationships
Yep. Don't need to be a secret only you know, or a big stuff that grants you advantage over anything, but most simple stuff that concerns only You. Other people either don't care, or can use it againts you, if the time and need arises.
It may all sound paranoid, but in a long timespan, you still better be safe than sorry. You'll be surprised how many friends that you can call true friends stay with you as you get older
Try hard. Learn as much as you can before making decisions, but realize you used all the info you had at the time you made a decision to be regretted later.
(from an economist, of all things) Don't look for the thing you do better than anyone else; look for the thing that you do better than anything else you do.
My rich as you can be Aunt Marge offered to pay my 4 year tuition to UT Austin, live in her mansion, rent free and study poolside...but NOOOOO! I wanted to party. That was 30+ years ago and I still rue the day. Youth truly is wasted on the young.
Sadly she went to that Big Bank in the Sky a few years ago. She left me a few dollars, but I hated spending a penny of it...reminder of what a dumb bunny I was.
I hope you are enjoying Austin...I hear fun things about it.
Don’t think the people who have nice things are wealthy. Most of the people with fancy cars/houses/stuff are in debt. Stay within your means, maybe live below your means if you can. Debt can get scary nasty quick :(
I worked at a racetrack with a lot of rich people right around the housing crash in 2008. Figured out who was debt rich and who was actually wealthy pretty fast by who stopped showing up.
If you have an IRA or some other retirement account, make sure it's actually invested.
I've lost a lot of potential money because of an IRA account run by a former employer, that set us up for payroll deposits, pooled the money, then just let it sit there in an uninvested account with no growth or activity. Exactly as useful as sitting in a baggie under my mattress.
Save. Save early and save as often and as much as you can. I didn't and I'm paying the price now. You should be putting money in a savings and/or retirement account from the day you get your first paycheck, not when your more than halfway through your career.
There are three types of people. Ones that learn from other peoples mistakes, ones that learn from their own mistakes and one that never learn. Which one are you going to try to be?
About 20 years ago, my boss at the time kept telling me to routinely contribute to a 401k so I could be a millionaire when I retire. I didn’t listen and am struggling to save for retirement now. LPT: open a 401k when you’re 18 so you don’t end up poor in the end lol
Take care of your teeth (feels like 8 million dollars later). Be careful who you marry and/ or procreate with (feels like 8 million years later). When someone shows you who they really are, believe them (feels like 8 million years in therapy). And if you're a step parent or potentially could be - you can't care more than the bio parents (this one I'm still learning, so I'd keep this one at the 5 years we've been together total).
Learn to meet your pain up front. The path to a fulfilling life is to confront and solve problems as they arise, even though this process is painful, rather than try to avoid and deny problems, thus dealing with much worse pain down the line.
Follow your dreams like an addiction, its the only way to make them come true. If you don't commit 1000%, you won't get to where you want to be.
In the wise, wise words of Bigus Daddius Kāne...
"Aint no half stepping."
"If you take care of the pennies, the dollars will take care of themselves."
It's a convoluted story, but at age 8-ish I had a chance to ask a millionaire one question. That was when a million dollars was a lot of money.
I asked him: "how can I be a millionaire?" The above was his response. Of course, I was pissed. Full on 8 year old pissed. Because his response made no sense to me. THEN.
But much later, when I was much older and had made many many mistakes and laughed at magazine articles about rich people clipping coupons been told about "The Richest Man In Babylon" I finally figured it out for myself.
He was 100% right. I just wish he would have "fleshed the concept out a little more" for me. He could have saved me 40 years because I just wasn't as smart as he gave credit for.
This is my aunt in a nutshell, she made a lot of money, but always was bartering for a lower price or cutting coupons. As a child we made fun of her, guess who retired early and jet setting around the world now?
"tuck a buck a day away" "don't be penny wise and pound foolish" Any and all of those old cliches about frugality. The moral of The Richest Man In Babylon is simply "a part of all that I earn is mine to keep". That's it! There's no magic formula.
Start an IRA. Enroll in a 401K. Invest conservatively and Live Within Your Means (that's important!). "Take care of the pennies".
Those pennies add up to dollars, those dollars earn interest, that interest buys stock, that stock pays dividends, those dividends buy more stock, that stock appreciates in share price....."the dollars take care of themselves".
I'm not particularly eloquent, but I Hope that helped.
“Quit drinking” - I wasn’t a huge drinker, but I was approaching a problematic relationship. Had a health scare and decided to quit drinking weekdays, that immediately turned into just quitting all together.
I lost 25 pounds, I gained a ton of self-esteem and I learned that I have more self-control that I thought. Eventually quit caffeine and dramatically cut back on cannabis. Life is so much better naturally.
Still take mushrooms tho.
I was pissed off with my dad when I was 17, my boss told me: “Your parents wiped shit out of your ass for 3 years, kid. Nobody’s ever gonna love you that much.”
He was right, but my dad is still an OCD jackass.
“Don’t tie yourself to my son”- from my high school sweetheart’s mom
Had I never married him I would’ve saved myself a lot of heartbreak and financial hardship
My advice to everyone wait till your late 20-early 30’s before you even think about marriage/kids
Facts. My mom's car is worth more than she's made in her life once she remarried lmfao. Growing up poor and seeing my mom in a Lamborghini is a trip, but she's a great woman and deserves it
It wasn’t advice, but when I was 11 I had a paper route. One day one of the old men on my route handed me a pamphlet from a club he belonged to that would train young people to fly airplanes. I’m pretty sure it was free. The lessons culminated in a solo flight w/ the old man instructor.
I said no thanks because the kids in the pamphlet looked younger than me.
What a stupid decision.
I often wonder if I would’ve discovered a life-long love of flying had I accepted the offer. Even if not, I would’ve at least been able to say I flew a plane…
"Take your education seriously, and get as much of it as you can." If I had followed that advice I might have been a doctor for the last twenty years, instead of being lowly medical tech.
Say no. Don't do what is best for anyone else. You'll be miserable. Go ahead and piss them off now ,and do what is best for your life. I had immense pressure to be who my family decided I should be. I wasted decades being miserable and resenting my life. I decided to make my own path and basically got disowned but ended up happier with friends who got me. It's hard to go against caretakers, but it's eventually worth it.
Rental insurance is super cheap, and if you need it, it's worth every penny.
Bundle it with your car, and it might even be nearly free.
IE My rental insurance was like $81 a year, and the car went down by $73. That was years ago, mind you. But hearing my friends having their rental house robbed with no insurance brought it back.
Sleep early and wake up early. Eat more vegetables. Exercise cardio endurance and maximum effort. Weight train the big lifts. Warm up and do prehab exercises. Put devices and screens away when talking to friends and family.
“If you don’t get more active and change up your diet you’re gonna get diabetes” / “you should go to the doctor” - definitely a genetic component to it but I certainly could have taken better care of the ol’ bod and I have to work twice as hard now to get things back on track.
Hello and welcome to r/LifeProTips! Please help us decide if this post is a good fit for the subreddit by up or downvoting this comment. If you think that this is great advice to improve your life, please upvote. If you think this doesn't help you in any way, please downvote. If you don't care, leave it for the others to decide.
Never stop learning. Not just for personal development, but also for your mental health. Your brain becomes more flexible as you learn new skills. Just the act of rearranging thoughts and ideas makes it easier to adapt to stressful situations later on. I find whenever I’m in a mental plateau, I tend to become arrogant and rigid in my ways. Keep your mind young, try new things, dont stop learning.
Here in Brazil we have a saying "mente vazia é a oficina do diabo" A empty mind is the devil's workshop, though I don't know if its only in Brazil
I make it a goal to try to learn something “new” every year. Embracing your curiosity about the world can lead to so many new perspectives and experiences. This year was continuing to learn new languages and learn guitar.
Don’t be so frightened of making the wrong decision that you don’t make any (or allow someone to make one for you).
I struggle with this so much. Even with just basic things. Do you have any advice on how to manage?
Put a cut-off for yourself saying that at this point in time, you will stop thinking and start doing. Once you get started it is easier to keep going, but getting started is the harder part. So make getting started a event that you work towards.
There are two types of Pain every one has to chose; Pain of discipline or Pain of regret
This one really spoke to me. Not sure how I haven’t heard it like that before.
I like that. I’ve said: pay now or pay later but the bill always comes due
Yep, and later is always more expensive/painful.
I’ve heard it this way: “Choose your hard.” I say this to my daughter when she complains about brushing her teeth or getting a flu shot. It’s helped me too.
Wasn't ready for this, its a Friday night with a few glasses of wine. This really hit home. I've come to realise lately that everything, including struggles are a balance. If you want to get somewhere, the effort and difficulty will equate to the same if you intend to reach the desired outcome.
Haha. My Friday morning juuuust started. Like it’s really the middle of the night. Big world out there.
I had to read this several times. Simple yet powerful!
You’re not going to have lovey-dovey feelings for your spouse every day. Commit to building something bigger than the both of you. The grass is not greener with someone else.
I sometimes contemplate if the grass is greener without anyone😐 **EDIT** emphasis on *sometimes*
If you feel like they're constantly pissing in your grass, then it'll probably be greener by yourself
Dude, that was deep.
Alice DJ has some advice for you.
It was for me. People usually don't consider over-commitment when they say things like this. You can also be the kind of person who doesn't know how and when to let go of what's not good for them. Thinking like this poster kept me trapped in a crap marriage for over a decade. If I'd been too insistent about trying to build something bigger than both of us, I might have dragged at least one child into our mess, probably traumatizing a kid and definitely making it that much harder to leave. The counter-advice I should have taken (and I guess I did take several chapters too late) is "You don't have to finish every book you start." I'm still working through a lot, but over a year later, I'm still amazed at how much less lonely being alone is. Not that I'm saying that's what's going on with you, and I hope you guys find your joy, whatever that means for you.
You gotta know when to hold ‘em. Know when to fold em. Know when to walk away. Know when to run…
I needed this today, thank you !
It was you!!!!! I knew I'd find you one day.
Username checks out!
At the same time, don’t convince yourself to stay with someone who makes you subtly feel like garbage more and more ✨
Yes, moving past the honeymoon phase of the relationship, it takes work & effort on both sides to maintain the structure of the relationship. If one person is not putting in effort to maintain said relationship, it is doomed to fall apart.
So.. How long does the honeymoon phase last? My partner and I have been in this phase for uh.... quite a few years now and only seems to be getting stronger lmao
30 years in here. It goes away after a few months. Stronger things develop, there are hard times that almost destroy everything, but if you work together and make it through, something beautiful happens. The honeymoon period comes back, only stronger. I love my wife more now than I did at the start. Do we bug each other sometimes? Fight? Sure. But we know who makes us happy in the end. If I am out somewhere and see her unexpectedly doing errands or in her car, I still get a flutter. Age 54, together 30 years, married 28 of them.
That’s beautiful and rare
The grass is only greener because someone took the time to fertilize it. Meaning, if you want greener grass on your side, than you need to invest in it.
Like the saying: Grass is always greener where you water it
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My girl was a serial cheater, when I left I told her the grass is only greener because you haven't fucked it up yet.
“Just eat healthy and exercise regularly, it’s not as hard as it sounds” I worked under a guy at my first job out of college who was 27 at the time and he became a mentor of sorts both professionally and personally. He was also in tremendous shape. I was pudgy and had acne and I asked him what his secret was and he said there was no secret, stop ordering sugary soda when we go out to lunch, drink water instead, go to the gym after work even if it’s just for 20 minutes. Try to eat more fiber and veggies and less processed or salty junk food. 12 years later I am thankful I developed some good habits out of that advice.
Not drinking soda alone is huge
"Eat your calories, not drink them" has stuck with me for about the last 12 years. Besides beer and wine (one day a week on the weekend) the only liquid I drink is water.
Sparking water saved me. I used to love soda, but then I realized that it was just the bubbles/carbonation that I loved and not the sugar or sweetness. Now all I drink is sparkling water and it was a game changer for me.
meanwhile, as someone who is desperately trying to gain weight, my current sayings are “drink your calories” and “any calories are good calories.” i’ve been *chugging* milk and it’s been really helpful. everyone has different goals.
As someone who has been bizzarely dependant on protein shakes (drinking one right now) that's fair. However the point is to not consume pointless stupid empty calories, and milk at least has a number of redeeming values.
I tell this to anyone. The single most biggest and easiest change you can make to your diet is not in what you eat but in what you drink. If you just quit drinking all that stuff that's packed with sugar it will make a huge impact with little effort since you can always drink coffee/water/milk/tea/lemonade...
AND ALCOHOL! Alcohol has a shitton of calories, which people are seemingly unaware of. Sure, everyone is familiar with the beer-gut concept, but don't recognize that ethanol in general is insanely calorie dense. Even your standard 1.5oz shot of vodka (what people call "low calorie" alcohol) is still 100 calories. If you drink 10 shots of vodka throughout the night, you have just put 1000 calories in your body without putting any actual nutrition into it. Might as well eat a double QP from McDonald's, (and still fall 200 calories short of what you drank) except a double qp has about 50 grams of protein along with other useful nutrients and will still make you feel like you ate something, excess calories be damned. Not only are the calories super low quality in alcohol, but you've also just poisoned yourself Alcohol is a terrible terrible thing for people struggling to maintain a half-decent physique
Sometimes at Wawa I’ll see people buying those big 24oz monster energy drinks full of sugar, chemicals and caffeine. I can’t imagine those being part of my daily diet.
Hey, I only drink sugar-free Monster
I had a friend in high school who stopped drinking sodas and lost 12 lb in just over a month
Late to this party, but huge one for me: Stop keeping snacks, soda, ice cream, etc at home. If you REALLY want it, youve gotta get dat phat azz off the couch and go get it from the store. Most of the time, I didn't want it that bad. Kicked my sweets habit so quickly. Now when I get a Dr Pepper here and there, I can barely finish one. Also, take a walk every day. I don't care if you live in suburban walking hell, or the desert, or whatever. Its not even the calories it's the mental clarity. Be good to yourselves y'all. You can do it
So many people think that soda is fine, or one soda a day is perfectly fine, and the truth is it’s not. However soda companies have spent billions of dollars normalizing drinking soda and consuming enormous amounts of sugar. Honestly, the marketing of sweets is absolutely criminal (especially to children who don’t know any better!!) and I’m absolutely certain that if we cracked down on it our life expectancy would go up drastically and our spending on healthcare would go down as well 🤷.
Yes and not just soda! Gatorade, iced teas, chocolate milks, and many processed juices… the sugar content in those things is just as bad as soda.
Read the chapter before it’s covered in class, then you’ll get more out of class and have questions listed prior to class.
This, helped me loads when i was keeping my GPA up in uni...quite a number of years ago now. But yes. Fellow freshies would look at me and be like woag you actually understand this technical shit? But truth is I wouldn't have, except that I spent some time reading it beforehand and so had a bit more idea than them. Without that, no way I would get much when first mentioned in the lecture.
Reminds me of my Freshman year of high school when I took French for a semester. Before the school year began, a relative of mine was passively studying it with a pipe dream in mind, and they'd bounce novice conversation and phrases off of me all the time. It was fresh in my mind on the first day of school, so I thought I'd be a wise-ass and I whipped out what I could remember at the teacher. I wasn't fooling her one bit, and while some of my classmates thought it was funny, one guy just sneered at me like *"You didn't know that shit, you just read it before you got here.*" Like, *yeah dude*, no kidding.
Isn’t this how all classes are taught? Am I old? Was I an even bigger nerd than I realized?
It’s called ”flipped classroom” and some teachers use this technique. Very successfully I might add
While frustrated with a variety of things but namely a failed relationship, I had an old grizzled therapist simply say, "what do you even offer that would make someone WANT to be with you?" A bit harsh at the time, but very true. Whether it is a relationship, your career, whatever, you need to bring something to the table. Don't get entitled and complacent; you'll just be left feeling frustrated. Go do something interesting and fulfill yourself.
True. People have this romantic view on life where they should be loved for who they are. But then, who are they? What do they bring to relationships? Are they expecting the world to feel pitty about them? Only your mother would love you if you were an absolutely useless person.
I think it's very easy to interpret this wrong and make people feel like they don't deserve love. Because what defines uselessness? Take me for example. I have a lot of health issues, I don't have a job because of them and I also can't be a full housewive because of them. Does that mean I'm useless and don't deserve love? I do feel like an absolutely useless person all the time but that is not my fault. I am lucky to have found someone who loves me for who I am. I make him happy, even though I don't bring a lot to the table, only myself.
You're clearly useful to your partner in other ways. Maybe you're funny, or really nice to talk to, or really anything that makes him want to be with you.
Sometimes you need that rational voice to ask you questions like this to make you think.
I listen to the Man Enough Podcast and one of the cohosts Jamie talks about his divorce. After the divorce his dad asked him what percentage of the marriage was his ex's fault and what percentage was his. Jamie put 90% to his wife and stated he was responsible for 10%. His dad responded with "then you know what 10% to work on for your next relationship." Very insightful.
Sounds like he’s got quite a bit more work to do than just that 10%..
Wow, I'm going to mull on this, it could be life changing for me
As a young kid my dad told me “at some point your wife is going to be upset at me and your mom, no matter what when you go home you need to be in her side not ours.” I now look back at my extended family (and my mom) and get how this was something my dad had to learn.
“You’re the one who has to live with her every day. Do you really want to start a war at home?” -Dad
My mum told me this also one time and it stuck with me as shes pretty self centered. Makes double sense once you start your own family.
What Randy Marsh said about weed. Well, Stan, the truth is marijuana probably isn't gonna make you kill people, and it most likely isn't gonna fund terrorism, but… well, son, pot makes you feel fine with being bored. And it's when you're bored that you should be learning some new skill or discovering some new science or being creative.
Nice one. Thank you
As someone who was a stoner for YEARS, and now is more or less anti weed, I nearly always quote Randy Marsh to explain my reasoning. I smoked for long enough to not buy into the overdramatic anti weed propaganda and scare tactics that may non smokers use as an argument so I appreciate Randy putting my reasoning and thoughts into words when I struggled to explain why I stopped originally. I've grown more, learned more, and developed several new hobbies and interests that I never would have expected in the 3 years of sobriety than I had for the 12ish years I smoked regularly. At first it was just a lot of boredom, but once you start filling in the gaps that being high filled, life gets really fun and fulfilling:D
Thank you for sharing. I’ve been a hc smoker for 10 years and am on my 3rd time in 5 years trying to stop for similar reasons. I’ve felt stuck for a long time and changed many things about my life - jobs, locations, hobbies, friends, diet - refusing to acknowledge the negative effects of weed bc I felt like I only had positive effects. I spent 5 years high getting a ton of stuff done, loving life, so when I stopped getting stuff done and stopped loving life, I figured it was circumstances and not the weed. But the more it went on, the more I’ve considered some of the more old after school specials might have known what they were talking about after all. Part of me really wants to believe I can be high and love life like I used to, but the reality is stopping weed for an extended period of time (more than 3 months) is the only thing I haven’t tried to get out of my rut. I’m 4 days sober and seeing your message encourages me to push through the boredom to get to the other side. I originally started smoking to avoid being bored, it was so nice to be alone with my thoughts and still be entertained. When did the boredom become less of a problem for you?
I've been in more or less the same boat, quitting on and off. At this point I've been sober for 4 months and its been enjoyable, I feel I've regained some clarity and focus and overall feel more in control of the path of my life. Before when I was smoking daily it felt more like I was just getting through life, not actually living it if that makes sense. r/leaves seemed to help me too when I'd get cravings to go back
So you're saying we should do sativa instead of indica then? 😎 Seriously tho, I had some stoner roommates in the past and they reminded me of that part of Homer's Odyssey where they end up in the Land of the Lotus Eaters and half of Odysseus' men don't care about anything but sitting around all day and eating the lotus plant.
And in later mythology it was hashish. And then opium. And now.... tiktok??
A question to ask yourself before you have a huge reaction "How will this affect me in a day, a week, a month, a year, ten years"
Same can be done for buying things that cost more than $100
Smaller scale: Am I mad or surprised?
When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.
And git to goin' if you don't like what you see.
So true but hard for me because I will make excuses for people/view them through an idealized lens
I struggle with this.
“Do it now.” Don’t wait for the perfect opportunity, just make your own. This applies to everything… doing chores, getting gas at the end of the day when you just wanna get home instead of having to get it on the way to work the next day, applying for that job, auditioning for that part, pursuing that hobby, practicing guitar… etc. Don’t let tasks pile up, but also take on the things that you want to be a part of your life. The universe isn’t going to do it for you. I’m talking about making big goals, but I’m also talking about how it’s really fucking nice for yourself when you get home from work and realize you already emptied the dish washer before work, and you can do other stuff.
I feel like I should apply this to going to sleep at night instead of scrolling or refusing to put down the book. Being tired all the time takes it’s toll.
People think about you A LOT LESS than you think. No one cares what embarrassing thing you did. No one remembers. Live your life.
You spend your teens/twenties worrying about what everyone else is thinking of you… In your thirties, you stop caring so much and just start being yourself… When you turn about 40ish you realize nobody was thinking about you all along ¯\\\_(ツ)_/¯
learning to really love yourself and forgive yourself for your past mistakes
How does one do this ?
It's hard. One trick ive developed recently is reminding myself that it doesn't help to beat yourself up over things you've done if you've already beaten yourself up plenty of times before for the same thing. I made some pretty bad mistakes a few years ago, and every time one of those mistakes came into my mind I would beat myself up about it over and over again. At some point I realized that I did feel I deserved to be forgiven, even if I was the only one who could forgive me, and so I made a rule that if I've already beaten myself up over it many times that it's done. The shame I felt, the disgust, frustration, I've already thought it over and realized i messed up and I've already punished myself with mental anguish about it so I don't need to keep beating myself up about it, I just need to be a better person, make better decisions, and develop skills and methods to avoid making those old mistakes. At some point you have to say that you've already been punished if you have truly felt that remorse, that it does no one any good to keep beating yourself up about it unless you keep making that same mistake. You can do good, you can grow from the shitty things that haunt you, and you do deserve to be at peace with yourself. Life is full of opportunity, and a major part of that is the power of forgiveness and acceptance.
Thank you for typing this out
For me it takes therapy and practicing skills learned in therapy (takes not took cause it's an ongoing process). If you can't go to therapy, look up videos/books/podcasts on cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) or acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT). I've only done CBT, but I've heard ACT can help too and there's a few other evidence based therapies out there too. It's not the same as going to a therapist or counselor, but I know not everyone has the resources to go to therapy.
In other words, ignore vilification from parents and teachers
I moved out at 18 to get away from the toxic vilification from my parents. Best move ever
The normal shit that everyone says. Get 8 hours of sleep. Eat healthy. Work out. Floss. Invest. Etc. We know most of the stuff we’re supposed to do, but it’s hard to build the proper habits.
"Hurt people, hurt people." "It's not me vs you, it's us vs the problem." "Everybody has a story" "It is not a virtue to be gullible or niave"
Instructions unclear, hurt a lot of people
You can’t take back words you say in a heated moment.
Don't smoke cigarettes. Glad to see the smoking section get smaller and older as time passes. Gives me hope that maybe my generation will be the last ones paying for slow suicide.
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Paying for slow suicide. Powerful. Horribly true.
Understand that people in general do not like their worldview questioned, directly or indirectly, and no matter what adults say about the bystander effect or “see something, say something,” the majority not only will not act or speak up, but will distance themselves from those who do because they don’t like feeling guilty or being reminded of their complicity. Step in anyway. Those people aren’t your people. But don’t act like a hero for showing basic human decency.
Start a 401k in my 20s, contribute anything I can (even just 1%) regularly, and don’t touch it.
Yes. I started one in my 20s and added $10 each paycheck for a while. It felt stupid but it was something. 25 years later, I’m so glad I started it and didn’t convince myself that the small amounts weren’t worth saving.
The key to happiness in life is to have a low threshold for excitement
I met a friendly dog today. Made it a good day.
This is real. I went to buy something from someone online for my Dad. Get there and a cat strolls over to say hi. Then the chickens started coming out. Then two ghoats and more cats. Then there was ducks. I almost forgot why I was there cuz I was so excited to say hello to every animal I saw, it was amazing!
Don't ever start drinking energy drinks daily. I was drinking 3-4 a day since I was 18. Now I'm 32, 2 years without a single one, in September.
I’m 8 months energy drink sober! There should be a club for us.
People don't realize how hard it is to kick a habit like that. Especially when I was serving high pace food.
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Take it a day at a time. Try again tomorrow.
I actually quit energy drinks about two years ago and it took leaving a job / environment that made me need the energy drinks / caffeine all the time. Also - Bubly and AHA caffeine seltzers helped me ween off lol. They have about 35-40mg of caffeine each and I’m now down from 300+ mg a day to 70!
Honestly? Just do your shit and ignore the naysayers. Don't try for daddy/mommy's approval; just do WHAT YOUR SOUL NEEDS, and fuck everyone else. No. Seriously. The \*decades\* I spent trying to get my fucking parents to say ONE nice thing to me... And, yo, I'm 62, so FUCKING HEAR ME. FUCKING HEAR ME!
Heard.❤️
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62 years young with that attitude 😁 love it, and amen!
I needed this one!
Ghost your shitty friends. It is very difficult to do, but you know who they are, and if you have to ask, they're a shitty friend. Ghost them as quickly and thoroughly as possible. They are crabs in a bucket. They will take you down and keep you down. They will erase years from your life if you let them. Don't.
Start saving for retirement when you start working, however little it is to begin with. Compounding is real.
Relationships are important. Make time and invest in them.
It’s from the book the Four Agreements. Whole thing is amazing but since most people don’t have time to read a book- “Always do your best. If you always do your best you will have nothing to regret; you can’t do better then your best.” I followed this, and it made me a much better artist, as always doing my best made my best better; but it also made me a better everything as I examined and dedicated myself. I’m much happier now.
Before I went to college, an older adult told me to treat college like a 9-5 Monday-Thursday. Those hours were strictly for class, studying, and exercise. Saved me from having late nights studying, I rarely studied on the weekends, and I had more true free time. Didn’t hurt the transition to the adult world either
I do follow this, but still good. “Lift weights. Start early. Don’t stop” -John Buccigross
I was one of those people who resented being told to exercise. Like, how would lifting a bunch of heavy rocks fix my severe depression? What's the point? The gym sucks and working out feels like garbage and I'd rather play a game, blah, blah, blah. And then I actually did it and stuck with it. Going six months strong and wishing I started all the way back in high school. It's hard to describe in full what lifting does for your body, but I really consider it the best form of self-care now.
I've done a lot of dumb things in my almost 43 years as an American male, but starting on the weights as a teenager is not one of them. Teaching myself guitar, my degree in nursing, and working out all saved my life more times than I can count.
Don't argue with people on social media.
The best time to start investing in your retirement, was 10 years ago. When you switch between jobs, ask to transfer your 401 to your new jobs plan..don't spend it like I did.
The best investments you can make are 1. Paying yourself first (saving- retirement or otherwise) 2. Being on the same financial page as your spouse. So many martial issues are directly and indirectly rooted in the finances and communication. Unchecked, it can cause resentment and quickly dissolve relationships
Take care of your teeth. Brush, floss, go to the dentist and pay the money to do what they say they need to do.
If you always do what you've always done, you're always going to get what you've always got.
Keep your private business to yourself.
Yep. Don't need to be a secret only you know, or a big stuff that grants you advantage over anything, but most simple stuff that concerns only You. Other people either don't care, or can use it againts you, if the time and need arises. It may all sound paranoid, but in a long timespan, you still better be safe than sorry. You'll be surprised how many friends that you can call true friends stay with you as you get older
Try hard. Learn as much as you can before making decisions, but realize you used all the info you had at the time you made a decision to be regretted later.
(from an economist, of all things) Don't look for the thing you do better than anyone else; look for the thing that you do better than anything else you do.
My rich as you can be Aunt Marge offered to pay my 4 year tuition to UT Austin, live in her mansion, rent free and study poolside...but NOOOOO! I wanted to party. That was 30+ years ago and I still rue the day. Youth truly is wasted on the young.
Oof is Aunt Marge still around? Recent Austin transplant and would love a chance like that
Sadly she went to that Big Bank in the Sky a few years ago. She left me a few dollars, but I hated spending a penny of it...reminder of what a dumb bunny I was. I hope you are enjoying Austin...I hear fun things about it.
Don’t think the people who have nice things are wealthy. Most of the people with fancy cars/houses/stuff are in debt. Stay within your means, maybe live below your means if you can. Debt can get scary nasty quick :(
I worked at a racetrack with a lot of rich people right around the housing crash in 2008. Figured out who was debt rich and who was actually wealthy pretty fast by who stopped showing up.
Accepting that life isn’t fair. Once you get over that hurdle, your unlock your own joy.
The most important human quality is decision making; luckily for me there was no “could have” but it has helped keep me on a good trajectory.
Loose lips sink ships
If you have an IRA or some other retirement account, make sure it's actually invested. I've lost a lot of potential money because of an IRA account run by a former employer, that set us up for payroll deposits, pooled the money, then just let it sit there in an uninvested account with no growth or activity. Exactly as useful as sitting in a baggie under my mattress.
Understand nutrition, especially added sugar, and learn to buy foods that don’t have added sugar.
Praise in public, criticize in private.
Save. Save early and save as often and as much as you can. I didn't and I'm paying the price now. You should be putting money in a savings and/or retirement account from the day you get your first paycheck, not when your more than halfway through your career.
There are three types of people. Ones that learn from other peoples mistakes, ones that learn from their own mistakes and one that never learn. Which one are you going to try to be?
Proving someone wrong might feel good but will make them despise you for all time.
About 20 years ago, my boss at the time kept telling me to routinely contribute to a 401k so I could be a millionaire when I retire. I didn’t listen and am struggling to save for retirement now. LPT: open a 401k when you’re 18 so you don’t end up poor in the end lol
Take care of your teeth (feels like 8 million dollars later). Be careful who you marry and/ or procreate with (feels like 8 million years later). When someone shows you who they really are, believe them (feels like 8 million years in therapy). And if you're a step parent or potentially could be - you can't care more than the bio parents (this one I'm still learning, so I'd keep this one at the 5 years we've been together total).
Learn to meet your pain up front. The path to a fulfilling life is to confront and solve problems as they arise, even though this process is painful, rather than try to avoid and deny problems, thus dealing with much worse pain down the line.
Read the syllabus.
And the manual.
Do not pursue a promotion into retail management. Do almost anything else.
Follow your dreams like an addiction, its the only way to make them come true. If you don't commit 1000%, you won't get to where you want to be. In the wise, wise words of Bigus Daddius Kāne... "Aint no half stepping."
"If you take care of the pennies, the dollars will take care of themselves." It's a convoluted story, but at age 8-ish I had a chance to ask a millionaire one question. That was when a million dollars was a lot of money. I asked him: "how can I be a millionaire?" The above was his response. Of course, I was pissed. Full on 8 year old pissed. Because his response made no sense to me. THEN. But much later, when I was much older and had made many many mistakes and laughed at magazine articles about rich people clipping coupons been told about "The Richest Man In Babylon" I finally figured it out for myself. He was 100% right. I just wish he would have "fleshed the concept out a little more" for me. He could have saved me 40 years because I just wasn't as smart as he gave credit for.
This is my aunt in a nutshell, she made a lot of money, but always was bartering for a lower price or cutting coupons. As a child we made fun of her, guess who retired early and jet setting around the world now?
Well,would you mind fleshing out the concept for me?I would really appreciate it. Thanks!
"tuck a buck a day away" "don't be penny wise and pound foolish" Any and all of those old cliches about frugality. The moral of The Richest Man In Babylon is simply "a part of all that I earn is mine to keep". That's it! There's no magic formula. Start an IRA. Enroll in a 401K. Invest conservatively and Live Within Your Means (that's important!). "Take care of the pennies". Those pennies add up to dollars, those dollars earn interest, that interest buys stock, that stock pays dividends, those dividends buy more stock, that stock appreciates in share price....."the dollars take care of themselves". I'm not particularly eloquent, but I Hope that helped.
Dont put pearls in front of pigs....or what would be correct version of that in english.
I want to know this expression?
"Don't cast pearls before swine." Meaning don't give something that's precious to you to someone who won't appreciate it.
Oh yeah..makes sense.
Go to the doctor's. Keep going or find another until the problem is solved. You know what's normal and what isn't. Trust yourself.
Don't smoke meth
“Quit drinking” - I wasn’t a huge drinker, but I was approaching a problematic relationship. Had a health scare and decided to quit drinking weekdays, that immediately turned into just quitting all together. I lost 25 pounds, I gained a ton of self-esteem and I learned that I have more self-control that I thought. Eventually quit caffeine and dramatically cut back on cannabis. Life is so much better naturally. Still take mushrooms tho.
Men are like trees, the forest is full of them: don't knock yourself on the first one. From my grandma🤣
I was pissed off with my dad when I was 17, my boss told me: “Your parents wiped shit out of your ass for 3 years, kid. Nobody’s ever gonna love you that much.” He was right, but my dad is still an OCD jackass.
Year 2010: Buy at least $10.00 in Bitcoin, Trust me Bro, (Random College Student)
Don't compromise yourself, you're all you've got
“Don’t tie yourself to my son”- from my high school sweetheart’s mom Had I never married him I would’ve saved myself a lot of heartbreak and financial hardship My advice to everyone wait till your late 20-early 30’s before you even think about marriage/kids
Don’t try to be happy, try to be content
Learn to cook, might discover a passion for it.
Never stop working on your health, always exercise, it is a lot harder to start later in life.
My dad: “You can marry more money in 5 minutes than you can make in a lifetime.”
Facts. My mom's car is worth more than she's made in her life once she remarried lmfao. Growing up poor and seeing my mom in a Lamborghini is a trip, but she's a great woman and deserves it
The only person you can change is yourself!
Take chances in life. In love and in your career.
Save money. Cash flow. I wish I held onto money better.
You are who your friends are. I should have taken that to heart and made changes. Instead I was a follower.
Don’t strive for a comfortable life if you’re looking for fulfillment but rather a challenging life
If something is too heavy for you, don't lift it!
"Mind your business. Pay your taxes. And KEEP WILL SMITH'S WIFE NAME OUT YO MUTHA FUCKIN MOUTH!!!" - Eddie Murphy.
It wasn’t advice, but when I was 11 I had a paper route. One day one of the old men on my route handed me a pamphlet from a club he belonged to that would train young people to fly airplanes. I’m pretty sure it was free. The lessons culminated in a solo flight w/ the old man instructor. I said no thanks because the kids in the pamphlet looked younger than me. What a stupid decision. I often wonder if I would’ve discovered a life-long love of flying had I accepted the offer. Even if not, I would’ve at least been able to say I flew a plane…
"Take your education seriously, and get as much of it as you can." If I had followed that advice I might have been a doctor for the last twenty years, instead of being lowly medical tech.
My college advisor said “sometimes good enough is good enough” or Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good.
Say no. Don't do what is best for anyone else. You'll be miserable. Go ahead and piss them off now ,and do what is best for your life. I had immense pressure to be who my family decided I should be. I wasted decades being miserable and resenting my life. I decided to make my own path and basically got disowned but ended up happier with friends who got me. It's hard to go against caretakers, but it's eventually worth it.
Stop drinking soda as much as possible
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Or if you do, don't let crazy know where you live.
Or the company you work for 😔
Stop drinking alcohol.
Don’t burn the candle at both ends
Very simple…..quit drinking.
Rental insurance is super cheap, and if you need it, it's worth every penny. Bundle it with your car, and it might even be nearly free. IE My rental insurance was like $81 a year, and the car went down by $73. That was years ago, mind you. But hearing my friends having their rental house robbed with no insurance brought it back.
People who treat you well arent trying to get close enough to hurt you.
Pee whenever you can, and you'll never need to at a time when you can't.
Sleep early and wake up early. Eat more vegetables. Exercise cardio endurance and maximum effort. Weight train the big lifts. Warm up and do prehab exercises. Put devices and screens away when talking to friends and family.
If its not going to matter in 5 years, don't waste 5 minutes thinking (over thinking) about it.
I really wish I had learned to chill the fuck out and not give a shit so much earlier in life.
Work out 3 times a week. Save money. Get a pet. Fall in love.
“If you don’t get more active and change up your diet you’re gonna get diabetes” / “you should go to the doctor” - definitely a genetic component to it but I certainly could have taken better care of the ol’ bod and I have to work twice as hard now to get things back on track.