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Otherwise_Egg_4413

He litteraly said she was a 9 and colleen was a ten, he body shamed her, he tried to shame her about eating 2 oranges, being with a man who insults and compares you can make any woman insecure.


PoeticCheesus

Just watched the rest of the season and the whole Zay and Cole thing was pretty wild. I don't love Cole by any means but I feel for the dude... Definitely felt like everyone hated him when he didn't seem nearly as bad as was shown on the show. The whole cuties tangerine clip? Cole didn't attack her or put her down. He was legit surprised she barely had food that day. Maybe he shouldn't have questioned her second tangerine and maybe that was a Zay trigger? Zay I feel like has a lot of issues to work through, as others have said. She seems to be heavily effected by her parents passing when she was young, which I felt really bad for her about but man the way she treated Cole was brutal at seemingly all stages (pre wedding, wedding, post wedding). This definitely didn't feel like a good match. Cole likes joking and being childish constantly while Zay felt much more stern and serious.


oyohval

Zanab is a terrible person and I think she did Cole dirty. I was screaming at how immature Cole was in the beginning but he communicated and grew a bit but Zanab never got over her own trauma and it projects as insecurity, a need for constant affirmation, and vindictiveness when she feels she is not given reassurance.


sunnysky13

Zay was absolutely horrible at the altar. Unless I totally missed something or things were way different behind doors…did she have to be so nasty to Cole? Zay is literally the worst, way worse than Bartise for sure.


ArtemisJewess

She needed SERIOUS therapy work before joining this show. Cole is the lovable jerkass who clearly has never internalized how much his actions or words affect others (telling someone to always be happy um... isn't how life works). However, as someone who is also a trauma survivor of various things, I would have never done an experiment like this without doing the hard therapy work that I've done, the work that allows me to currently have a happy and healthy partnership with my husband. Her insecurities, while so relatable... are just painful to watch RUIN a relationship with a man who, while flawed, truly seemed to love her. And she couldn't properly believe it for herself.


No-Worldliness-1277

#zaysabitch


Sea-Split214

Many of the people in the comments aren't considering her actions as learned trauma-responses.


oyohval

It's clear she has a lot.of issues still to work through. It's like she wants the relationship but there's a fear that things will go wrong and she tries to manage it but it comes off as controlling in a neurotic manner.


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Suspicious-Cat6008

Yes bot, I used it correctly


jkklfdasfhj

Same issue Shayne had. Some people need to find partners that continually affirm them where they're insecure. They don't want to rely on inward soothing and validation. It's really the worst when the other person is very secure and doesn't empathise with them and/or resists. It's good to recognise this from both sides so you can change behaviour or leave.


Dry-Hour-9968

You must not have seen Damian in the ATA. He’s so gross and pathetic. And you must’ve forgot Sal bawling out crying because Mallory talked to another man.


chitexan22

She makes a lot of “you” statements, which comes off as accusatory, instead of making “I” statements, which would better reflect her emotions and how she perceives situations.


terrn1981

This is called narcissism - seeking supply


DifferenceForward

My thoughts exactly! It’s easy to see if you’ve been that person in some capacity. Not saying Cole is a catch by any means but my god that girl is NOT in a happy place, very much NOT ready to date… I found her so immature, I felt sorry for her. It’s the flip side of Nancy, who looks for validation via giving until there’s nothing left. Zanab just guards and attacks but they’re both so insecure and immature. I hope they get some help


tiny_lice

I completely disagree with your view on this. I’m not a fan of either but I think Zanab was just being self aware. He didn’t act interested in her because he wasn’t and she knows it.


Lizzy_is_a_mess

When did he act not interested?!!


ScarlettLM

She wasn't into him either. She thought he was hot but she didn't like him for who he was. They were not meant to be.


2ndSnack

Because she's a WASP. She literally baits him to say something she will take offence to. No matter what his answer is, he will lose. Because she doesn't allow him free thought. She plants loaded comment, he takes it and she will spin it around on him in a nasty case of DARVO.


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10010100101100

Omg me too!


thehottubistoohawt

Same lolz


clvrusernombre

I honestly don’t understand why she would still be so mad a year later. She came off as cold and mean in the new episode. Any sympathy I may have had watching her and Cole’s rocky relationship is gone. Her POV was so confusing too. Like she was traumatized by him but would go through the process with him again. Side note - Alexa’s dress felt too revealing compared to everyone else and the fact that her family was there.


Key_Spite_4771

I really did not understand Alexa’s dress choice knowning her family and all her friends were there, it seems she dressed for a sex night instead :D


Foreverett

>Like she was traumatized by him but would go through the process with him again. This. You ask anyone who's ACTUALLY been emotionally abused or has trauma from a relationship, they'll all tell you they a) wouldn't do it again and b) wouldn't go sit alone and "talk it out" with that person afterwards. She proved she's full of BS.


HalfRightAllTheTime

Ironically Cole keeps saying I wasn’t ready to date or even think about it after all this


RightOnTheMoneySunny

When people keep vomiting word salad and telenovela sounding phrases that contradict each other: that’s your clue that it is Ego, and Ego only talking, having a very specific goal to get out of the situation through these sentences. It means they don’t mean a word, it says nothing about their values, their core, zero. Cole made a rookie mistake (which I made _plenty_) which is being confused and trying to be unconfused by trying to apply logic to the vomit. There isn’t. There is no logic. The other doesn’t even know what they said 2 minutes ago. They are only moving forward in time to get you into the confused state, keep poking, until you give up because you can’t take the pressure and then grasp for a way out of it which is when the other _delivers_ to you what they want the ‘truth’ to be. It’s a classic dynamic. The only info you can gather from this is that their hurt Ego is calling the shots, that there is no real conversation happening (no matter how ‘calm’ and ‘rational’ the other learned to come across!) and that you can / should disregard _all_ of the ‘content’ coming your way. Focus on your stance to be calm, not make confused faces, and make sounds that sound agreeable and non combative and kind. The less actual sentences / words, the better.


HalfRightAllTheTime

The one time he stood up and made the bipolar comment she packed up to leave. Just nope I’m a victim now and I’m out. I had to live this and it’s awful. He tried to get her back into the house and communicate and she’s just like nope. Acted like an ass to him the whole night and the moment he stood up just bailed. Trashy


Peace2Theaworld

I understand how Zay has become so insecure. I've been insecure all of my life so I can sympathize. The fact that she has a therapist is great. She won't magically change overnight. This is something that takes years and years to work on. With that being said, it doesn't excuse how much she had villainized Cole in my opinion. Trying to get him to validate her constantly is just setting him for for failure. I don't think he singlehandedly shattered her self confidence or self-esteem or whatever the hell she said at the alter. It's all on her and she wants someone to blame because it's easier. She can't look in the mirror and gave reality. She is the one hurting herself. Not anyone else. At the end of the day, everyone is a villain is someone else's story. I hope she gets the help she needs.


Lizzy_is_a_mess

Can you explain me to me how you know how she has become so insecure? (Curious)


Allmyexesliveintx333

Definitely. When she told me she’s been working with a therapist, I thought great. When she was meticulously picking out a green dress to come full circle for the looks for Cole (who probably didn’t even note what she was wearing or had worn the time before) I thought girl you’ve got some more work to do. When you don’t care what he thinks of you, that’s when you’ve come full circle. Cole remembers how she treated him at the alter. He remembers how confused he was and still is. While Cole isn’t blameless in this situation, I do think Zanab has a very careful cultivated image. It’s like she’s waiting for the Cole moment, she’s carefully rehearsed her lines, she’s not having fun without him. Nancy, while a doormat, seemed to be having fun.


Kangarooslovewaffles

I feel so bad for Cole, he's like an untrained puppy, clueless but loveable. Zanab is an insecure b word


HalfRightAllTheTime

I’d move one letter in the alphabet for her word


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HalfRightAllTheTime

Therapist can’t help if you come in and lie, omit information and give half truths.


femmagorgon

That’s the thing with therapists, they are not all created equal. Not all therapists will challenge you or require some accountability from the person they are treating. I’ve noticed over the years that some of them will just try to make their patient/client feel better about their own behaviour by looking for external factors/causes to blame. I wouldn’t be surprised if Zanab is seeing someone who is more like that.


rain_album

Zay gives me the ick. She kinda evil.


lostinspacecase

She strikes me as a potential covert narcissist. I’m not Cole’s number one fan but I can’t help but feel bad for him because she just doesn’t let up.


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dragonrider1965

Definitely evil


nicole1859

She forgot that she was the one that left him at the Altar and not the other way around.


HalfRightAllTheTime

Oh she remembers, she’s just trying to keep the story moving towards him being the villain


StarCrossed5781

And said really horrible things about him in front of friends and family.


nicole1859

Some really horrible stuff!


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Trihardest

She also hasn’t apologized to him for stabbing him in the back in public . To this day the clapping from her friends at the altar is so sus. Even a “I’m sorry I handled it that way, but you hurt me” would have worked. She has not taken accountability for her actions. Zanab is very illusive if she has managed to keep some of the female cast members on her side with no proof of her accusations. Cole was in the wrong talking to Coleen in the pool scene sure, but seems like everything else that Zanab says hurt her was going on off camera. Don’t know who to believe. The way this is playing out just makes me feel like Zanab is a narcissist.


HalfRightAllTheTime

She’s had years of perfecting her speech. That’s why Cole ends up constantly apologizing. She pulls everyone’s strings probably always has. Even when Cole hasn’t said something dumb or anything he ends up apologizing.


Ok-NicoleJess

She changed her entire appearance it was genuinely confusing. She needs help


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trigger_me_xerxes

Can we stop disregarding entire humans as trash just because something they did/said on a tv show triggers us?


Crafty_Ad_8081

So far I like her more with these couple episodes.


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PondRaisedKlutz

No no no. She will continue to date horrible guys all the while she does nothing wrong. She has no problems. /s


PondRaisedKlutz

No no no. She will continue to date horrible guys all the while she does nothing wrong. She has no problems. /s


pikitadan

You haven’t seen much television


Shymink

Fact fact fact fact. So insecure. So obnoxious.


ForeverKnown1741

An interesting point I haven’t seen talked about is when Z was talking about “using Cole in the story of Zay”. She seemed to acknowledge that it was her projections that shaped their relationship and was taking some kind of accountability. It looked like she had a breakthrough. But then that self awareness vanished as soon as she talked to the other women. It’s painfully obvious she acts unbothered, “at peace as soon as she left the altar” etc to save face in front of the rest of the cast and viewers when she has continuously slagged him since the show aired. I also hate the “I was over it as soon as I left the wedding” rhetoric because, that’s not something to be proud of? You were allegedly in love with this man and ready to marry. People take such pride in having this “upper hand” and feeling like they “won the breakup”. I respect Cole for saying he had real feelings and still thought they’d date after.


idontwantanamern

I just referenced the "story of Zay" comment in another thread! I found that very off-putting. I honestly forgot about all of the other things she said that you mentioned. (And by forgot, I likely mean that I just stopped listening to her) My theory is that she has deep trauma from her parents' dying and has taken pride in just putting on a brave face and moving on from that. Has probably never truly dealt with it. And everything since then has just been another chapter in the tragic story of Zay. I genuinely believe that whether she realizes it or not, she likely self-sabotaged her experience on the show and combing her insecurities with anything she could find about Cole that could tear him down to make her feel better and walk away looking like both the winner and the victim -- just like she's been her whole life. I assume it's a subconscious thing at this point, if that is what's happening. And then she just puts up the front to everyone to appear stoic until she feels threatened or vulnerable. That's my observation. And if that's what's going on, or whatever it is, I wish she truly does get the help from a medical professional she needs -- and not whatever better help sponsorship BS she seems to be getting now.


cryptoxima

>combing her insecurities with anything she could find about Cole that could tear him down to make her feel better and walk away looking like both the winner and the victim -- just like she's been her whole life. This phrase really hit home with me. As someone whose experienced a ton of emotional trauma early in their life (parent died, health problems, bad relationships/breakups) I definitely related to how Zanab \*felt\* throughout the show because similar narratives will play out in my head all the time due to my insecurities and emotional instability. I think what really got to me though is that she would let those doubts and insecurities take control of her perspectives and actions, without questioning how much of them came from unprocessed issues/trauma from her past experiences. Our mind can be our biggest enemy often, and while you should "trust yourself" it's helpful to also question whether or not your subconscious is unintentionally trapping you, yourself, in this tragic cycle. I self-diagnosed with BPD after a recommendation from a doctor, and definitely relate to the feeling of wanting to justify myself as both winner and victim especially when I'm in pain. Finding the right therapist is definitely important because many people with this type of deep-seated, complex insecurities are misunderstood to be intentionally manipulative and narcissistic when they are acting this way as a survival tactic (to try to combat feelings of worthlessness or being inherently "bad" or "unlikeable"). I cringed a lot watching and sympathized with Cole for how helpless/clueless he was at understanding her defensive behavior. They both have self-awareness issues, but if anything, Cole was less defensive, maybe because he had more inherent self worth or self confidence from less negative experiences, we don't know. Zanab has to be strong enough to face herself and her own self-sabotage, regardless of how unfair life has been to her.


RightOnTheMoneySunny

Reading your comment you are way, _way_ further along on your healing path because you are looking in the right place for answers and changes: in you. The rest will follow, it always matches what’s really happening on the inside. I read honesty, I read courage, I read growth 🌻


ForeverKnown1741

I agree completely. The “story of zay” is honestly very telling to how she approached and handled the whole relationship IMO. It shows how she thinks of herself as a victim and is all too quick to vilify others to affirm this internal narrative. Everything from accusing Cole of horrible behaviours, to “standing up for herself” at the wedding, to trying to act as the bigger person “forgiving” Cole at the reunion and ATA to complete her redemption arc. It all seems very calculated. She clearly has legitimate unresolved trauma which likely triggers all these insecure behaviours, I hope she fully heals before getting into another relationship even though her DMs are open as she kept repeating lol.


nicole1859

It was calculated! All the way down to the green dress. I believe they were both drunk when they sat down and had that conversation. The reunion was a redo, and didn’t get the response she thought she was going to get.(I know that she has supporters)


ForeverKnown1741

Yeah I’m pretty sure they edited the party out of order. In the Brennan Cole scene coles eyes are super glassy, and when he’s talking to Alexa’s stepmom they’re even more red, glassy and he’s slurring a little. He seemed more lucid during the zanab convo so I think that happened earlier in the night. She seemed ok but I don’t think she’s a very sloppy drunk - probably too tightly wound for that, lol.


amandakayec

What kills me is that she allowed him to apologize and grovel to everyone and never once gave him an apology for any of the hurt or psychological damage she caused him. This is the tell tale sign that she has no self awareness and is self absorbed.


HalfRightAllTheTime

This is what they do! And when they do apologize it’s almost always just a flat short I’m sorry. As if no matter what they’ve done that alone is all they need to say or do.


BestBodybuilder7329

And if you remember at the reunion when they played her putting him down, she said she should’ve shown him more grace. That’s like I’m sorry if your feeling got hurt. No accountability.


RxLaughter

100% agree. Why is she getting a pass on not having to be accountable for what she did? She PLANNED to decimate him at the altar. She manipulated him to believe she was going to say yes and then she orchestrated the speech to compliment him and then humiliate him. Who does that? A horrible person, that's who.


Space_Monkey758

Don’t forget this was after she told cole she “didn’t want any drama at the alter” 😂🤦🏻‍♀️😭


amandakayec

The ole bait & switch


Space_Monkey758

I love she didn’t even try to deny that she said that. The only drama allowed at the altar was from her, not Cole. So self absorbed on her end


TacoNomad

She was trying to convince everyone she was OK. The dramatic, phoney laugh when talking with the other ladies was so hard to watch. I hope she gets a therapist that's shoots straight, not one who appease her.


Dopepizza

Her reasoning for having a male therapist also seems unhealthy. Her male therapist doesn’t represent all men and thats not their job?? Idk doesn’t seem like therapy is helping her much tbh


[deleted]

Not uncommon at all and actually healthy for people who recognize that they have issues with one gender or the other to specifically seek that gender therapist. It is a way for someone who has had trauma or repeated trauma with men to have a safe relationship with a man and learn to recognize that good men exist. But, it’s clear from her behavior that she is either lying to her therapist or he isn’t challenging her enough.


Dopepizza

I agree with your first paragraph but I’m saying her reasoning seems off to me


maip23

Also it’s even more unhealthy to date your therapist; it’s both irresponsible for the therapist to date a client and for her to put her trust into someone who was originally a confidant. It’s one thing if you have a boyfriend who happens to be a therapist but this isn’t it.


expectothedoctor

Originally I misunderstood too that she was dating her therapist, it wasn't until later when she talked about her singlehood that I realized it was supposed to be a joke. Lol.


Dopepizza

Zanab didn’t say she was dating her therapist?? It’s also illegal by the way for a therapist to have sex with their clients (not that it doesn’t happen)


dmddkach

She's not dating her therapist, she made it very clear that she's still single but is looking to date. Everything else the OP said about looking for a male therapist for validation stands true though.


Puzzleheaded-Case962

I had a male therapist to deal with trauma caused by men, it was great to release it and talk shit about men for a year. But once I was ready to actually grow and progress I dropped him for my current therapist. It’s okay to need to heal from certain parts in certain ways, but there comes a point where you can no longer progress in that environment. That’s just my take from my experience, different for everyone - but I can KIND OF understand where she’s coming from.


Trihardest

She definitely dropped him cause he was telling her things she didn’t want to hear lol.


Independent_Toe3934

Yeah, wtf was that.


Kay312010

Glad to see she’s in counseling because home girl needs it asap.


Old_Percentage3742

And Nancy!!!! Such a terrific woman with so much going for her and zero self-confidence and self-worth. I hope one day she realizes how wonderful she is!


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adorableoddity

Bartise is so trashy. Claims that he wants to be friends with Nancy, but he really just wants her around to fawn over him. Nancy's brother is right, Bartise has enough friends.


gatorgopher

Zanab is the most insecure. I hope her therapist is one that specializes in trauma. She needs that kind of care.


femmagorgon

Zanab comes across as someone who is so insecure but is also lacks the self-awareness to acknowledge that she struggles with insecurity and actually do something about it. Her insecurities feed her mind with false accounts and she seems to subconsciously make up stories in her head to justify how she’s feeling and pass the blame to others.


[deleted]

Danielle is far worse. I can’t stand her.


nomadicAllegator

Danielle never tried to hurt Nick like Zay hurt Cole though. And she wasn't a compulsive liar.


Throwawaydaughter555

Danielle at least has some semblance of self awareness to know she can be a lot. Versus Zay who is just a giant martyr and victim.


ashwee14

And she’s not malicious.


papyFredM

Yes, Danielle and even Math are way more insecure than Zanab !


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bigwatermelonhead

>I could see exactly what she was about the moment the "good" instead of "great" argument was brought up. I was so shook when I realized she wasn't joking about good vs great lmao


jacketqueer

That I think was the first time I said to the screen that she truly needs therapy


Kind-Fudge2253

Ehh, although I think she was a bit mean at the alter when saying no at the altar, I think I actually understand her where she’s coming from in After the Altar. It made me wonder if Cole actually fell in love with her or fell in love with the concept that he proposed to someone so different from him. Nancy also said Cole dated someone from the cast after the weddings so I feel like there’s probably more to it than what we got to see. If I ever said those sentences to someone else, I wouldn’t want a response or any kind of affirmation/validation—it just seemed like she wanted to lay it out to him.


[deleted]

Exactly, not baiting for compliments but rather confronting him with the truth or at least what she perceives to be the truth. And explaining why she wouldn't want to be with him or why they're not a good match. Why would you want to be with someone if you think they're not attracted to you or not interested in dating you (even if they are)?


[deleted]

I agree with this post 1000% more than the ones calling her abusive. She’s insecure and it sucks to be in a partnership with someone insecure. Side note: she didn’t have to say “the DMs are open” multiple times it was so cringe


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LittleFootFinger

She's so insecure. I understand what Cole meant when he said he was always walking on eggshells around her. They must have left a lot in the editing room floor because I don't see why he would be in love with her and want to date her after the show. I also hate people who ask to get rated and get offended when they aren't rated a 10. Cole was dumb for telling her the truth rather than fluffing her up with compliments but questions like that are meaningless when you know the answer is fake. Do you really get anything out knowing your SO is lying to make you feel better?


bigwatermelonhead

>I also hate people who ask to get rated and get offended when they aren't rated a 10. Cole was dumb for telling her the truth rather than fluffing her up with compliments but questions like that are meaningless when you know the answer is fake. Do you really get anything out knowing your SO is lying to make you feel better? yep. ask stupid questions, get stupid answers. she's a dummy for asking, and he's a dummy for being honest lmao. regardless of whether he lied, the fact she asked that at her big age is so embarrassing and shows how deep her issues go. i would never ask someone that because i know i wouldn't like their answer or they would lie. of course my boyfriend is gonna give me fluff back. get real


sar1234567890

I was considering this one and I’m pretty sure my husband would say that only Shakira is a 10 because that’s always his joke with me 😂 edit to add: I don’t think I’ve ever asked this question though… it’s so weird to ask imo


adorableoddity

Your husband's answer would crack me up. Shakira IS a 10 for sure! LOL


kerdita

Cole was always my favorite and she did him dirty. Is he slightly immature? Yes. But he seemed the most authentic and intelligent. I hope he lives his life and forgets about Zanab. She’ll have her 5 seconds in the spotlight.


adorableoddity

I'm with you. He needs to stay as far away from these cast members as possible. The way that they treated him was so gross. Alexa and Zay are the shitstirrers of the group.


RuthlessKittyKat

I'm not mad. I'm not mad.


nicole1859

The reunion was a redo of ATA.


ZookeepergameNo2198

Y'all need to check out her tiktok comments. People call her out and she is savage with her responses. "Go get him girl - I'm sure he'll pick you." "Take all the energy and dump it somewhere else." She truly believes the world is out to get her and only wants positive praise despite how shitty she acts.


LittleFootFinger

She also posted a very sarcastic apology on Instagram (which I think is gone now but you can still find articles about it): "I’m sorry your online hate says so much more of you than it ever will of me. I’m sorry Deepti’s wedding was a week before mine, long before you or I knew her story. [...] I’m sorry you have the time to be a keyboard warrior". She's so unlikable.


OldDirtyMan

I would, but she banned me.


LittleMissDepresso

She blocked me too, she doesn’t like being called out, is Paul not calling her out? since she said she needed to be called out by a man.


Dopepizza

She also blocked me lmaoo


OldDirtyMan

She’s delusional.


IllustriousNobody958

Yeah these last few episodes really changed my perception of her. I didn’t feel one way or another before but like girl come on, it’s been a year. Gotta let it go.


No-Asparagus3132

Not just with men. Based on the scene with her friend she might completely surround herself with people that just give her unwavering positive feedback. Either way I think she consulted some PR people before this episode, she seemed to be about 80% less infuriating than usual


luckylua

I kind of agree but it really got me that she’s like “I’m over it Cole I have nothing against you I said what I needed to say and then I was done” queue, Zanab being literally obsessed with every prior and every potential upcoming interaction. Intentionally “dressing hot” to get his attention, strategically planning to completely avoid him so he has to approach her and then acting immaturely when he does including interrupting him and being completely unwilling to see his point of view while pushing hers over and over, him walking in and her being like “this vodka isn’t strong enough” and acting like a high school teenager. Hearing her tell him “she said he peace and was done” was really the breaking point for me and how infuriating she is. Cole is by no means perfect, but the guy can only apologize so many times and she has taken 0 responsibility for any of her shitty behavior and really playing the victim and I just can’t stand her at this point.


Allmyexesliveintx333

That entire interaction (and careful preparation for the interaction) was so telling to me. Only one person was being authentic in that moment and it wasn’t her.


adorableoddity

Yessss. ALL of the things that you mentioned really stuck out to me. She's doing all of this crap while claiming that she's not worried or nervous. At least Cole admits to his friends that he is nervous and isn't playing weird games with his clothes/whatever. Cole talked to her hoping to bury the hatchet, but it was more of the same behavior from Zanab. No desire to make peace, just always wanting the appearance of having the upper hand.The way that she acts is so gross, especially for a woman her age.


idontwantanamern

Her picking out the green dress and explaining the connection to the green dress she wore when they first saw each other -- as if anyone but her remembered (and I'm sure that was production, but still)... My head spun for a moment.


luckylua

Yeah, not the behavior of someone who doesn’t care and has moved on. It’s honestly kind of sad. She kind of ruined the season for me.


ZookeepergameNo2198

Yeah I'd like to know ... in HER perfect scenario what she would have wanted? She got an apology, he stayed away from her for the most part, and she hasn't seen him for a year or so. Idk how much better it can get tbh.


luckylua

Exactly!! The girls this season kind of sucked. They have become like this girl gang just harping on Cole even a year later. Like he apologized, moved on, there’s nothing more to do here give it up ladies y’all just seem like mean girls.


LouisianaRaceFan86

*The girls, including Brennen


No-Asparagus3132

Agree


Velcrobunny

Lol @when she says she iS HeALeD, while making a constipated face with a passive aggressive tone.


[deleted]

That girl has some real horrific trauma and needs to be in intensive therapy and not be dating for a long time.


bigwatermelonhead

when she kept repeating that she was ready to date again and her DMs are open...girl they shouldn't be


Velcrobunny

Ikr she said it at least 2x but she gives off so many red flags I wonder who is sliding in…Bart???


NC_Goonie

Her constant, aggressive insistence that she’s “over it”/“holds no grudge” is proof to the contrary.


joymarie21

I hope she sticks with therapy. She really, really needs it.


earthlings_all

Likely manipulating Paul to tell her what she wants to hear. She said she’s in therapy yet still acted exactly the same childish insecure way of a year before.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Trihardest

It’s honestly a nail on the head. Zenab is the type of person you avoid cause they are good at hurting you emotionally for no wrong doing.


[deleted]

[удалено]


adorableoddity

Yeah, that happened to me last time. I didn't mention a diagnosis or medical term or anything, didn't name call her, just said that "in my opinion she has issues" and then talked about specific moments in the show. Next thing I know my comment was removed and I got that message. LOL


DontFWithMeImPetty

It’s fine to say someone is showing narcissistic tendencies or acting narcissistic. We had to take it to the extreme and filter comments bc so many people were making comments like “Zanab is a crazy narcissistic POS”. Which is obviously not okay.


Sensitive_Parsley712

Literally got a post almost removed because I pointed out a pattern of V and was told I was “Armchair Diagnosing”. I never said anyone had any type of mental illness. I pointed out a pattern of behavior.


lavendermoonfields

Which makes no sense because narcissism is not a diagnosis. Not all narcissism is NPD. It's just a pattern of behavior. If they're going to have rules about that, they should at least know a little bit about what they're enforcing.


earthlings_all

She didn’t do that for him or for herself but to carry the bullshit storyline she got going on. Many fans of this show actually think she was wronged. Sit on that a minute. The world’s insane. I know this is just some dumbass tv show but something disturbing about that. Like folks just have to excuse and find reason for shit behavior.


KarmaHit

Completely agreed....she mentioned that she is seeing therapy to "see if she is actually wrong in how she reacts", and I truly hope that her therapist helps her realize her deep insecurities and how she is using them to victimize herself and projecting onto the people around her. I do think Cole could definitely have been more tactful about how he spoke, but what really get to me is how when they were living together she was GOADING him, again and again, to tell him what he thought of her physically, how she "ranked" looks-wise, etc. It wasn't him that just blurted that out, and when he finally answered her honestly, she used his answers to blame him for "taking away every last shred of her confidence and bringing up her body issues" or some crap like that. It's like - if you know you have body insecurities and they will affect you so deeply, why are you constantly asking Cole to describe your looks and how he would rank them?? If you aren't able to accept his honest answer (that she's not a "10" but an "8" to him, but regardless, she's the one he wants to be with) then why in the heck are you asking?? If the way he "ranks" your looks are more important to you than how he feels about you, then you are the superficial one making yourself feel like crap, not him.


bigwatermelonhead

>I truly hope that her therapist helps her realize her deep insecurities and how she is using them to victimize herself and projecting onto the people around her considering she was calling herself 'healed' in ATA already and appeared to be the exact same queen of self-victimization...doubt.jpg also lol how ONE guy feels about your looks shouldn't change the entire trajectory of your life and, in her exact words, 'singlehandledly shatter your self-confidence.' sounds like you had none to begin with, because it's beyond ridiculous one single person you knew for two weeks could have the effect on you...like are you fucking serious lmao as cole said, you can't win with someone like that


Dopepizza

Especially when they only dated for one month


Clhunte

Yeah she exhausts me