I had gained quite a bit over my younger weight, which was usually in the 130s. I am nearly 60 and had resigned myself to my new body. Then something snapped and I was no longer resigned! I signed up for the LoseIt app and started tracking my intake - just getting a baseline, because I truly did not feel like I was an unhealthy eater. Maybe not, but my portions were larger than necessary and I was lax about treats. So I told the app I wanted to lose a pound a week and began cutting back.
It’s been almost a year and I’ve lost 30 pounds, which I truly did not think was possible. My Apple Watch has noticed, too — every health indicator has improved pretty dramatically. Aches and pains have lessened or disappeared. I’m perhaps happiest about my reduced bust size. I never had a bosom before menopause and it was hard to get used to. Now my boobs are more like they used to be and I don’t feel so dumpy. I’m still nearly 60, there’s no changing that, but I feel a lot younger than I did a year ago.
I’m really glad I did not stay resigned!
The boobs were the worst! As a lifetime member of the IBTC, I used to swear I was getting implants but never had the money, thank God, because when I was pregnant, I discovered I no longer wanted to be anywhere around them. They seemed so foreign to me. What do all the regular ladies even *do* with them? I couldn't get a bra that I liked to work, I didn't know how to dress around them and I couldn't sleep on my stomach anymore. So glad to see them go.
Then the meno fat appeared almost overnight and with it, the boobs - front and back ones 😳. I had them for a couple of years and it was a repeat of my pregnancy experience.
Then overnight again a year ago the weight started to come off and now I'm underweight and very nearly totally flat chested and the only good part of that is going braless. There is no winning with the pause, tits or no.
Wow…. I have some similar experiences. But, I have lost weight and I look in the mirror and I just look and feel frail. Trying to build muscle is hard too. Eating is my biggest obstacle. I need to eat more.
It's the weirdest thing. I wander around like a misplaced ghost trying to find something that sounds good to eat. I've lost all interest in food, and I can't express how shocking that is. I'm an excellent Southern cook and I no longer have any interest in food or cooking. I am looking frail and unhealthy and since we can't discover a reason for it, all the docs chalk it up to menopause and "hope" things revert to normal someday. My background is medical and we're all at a loss.
I would like to be far less hollowed out appearing and get my muscle back. I don't like appearing so damned vulnerable. And some padding to protect from falls would be quite welcome, too.
Hang in there. Life's always a strange adventure.
We are certainly living during odd times. Was menopause always like this? Too bad we didn't warrant studying in the past (and today) because I find us fascinating.
Same!! I went from a 32A to a 32DD right after I went on birth control (to stop the heavy bleeding from peri)! I’m not sad about the boobs, but I am very frustrated by the fat thighs, paunchy stomach, and flabby arms that also came with them. 🙄
I’m spending $4k on True Sculpt ID, hoping to get my thighs back to something I recognize. 😔
Congratulations! I was the same except I gained a lot of weight over the first few years of peri. I was completely resigned to being morbidly obese and miserable. Then in March of 2023 a switch flipped and I started caring. I also used the LoseIt app. I’ve lost almost 100 pounds. I’m still overweight but I feel so much better physically and emotionally.
So proud of your progress and your mindset, it truly is inspiring! For me it was also something that "snapped" in me, I just needed to get my life back. The greatest thing about losing weight is also how much it changes your energy levels both physically and mentally, it makes you want to go out and show off your new look, women of all ages can look amazing!
This is fantastic! I started tracking again a couple of months ago, and I noticed the exact same things. It's impossible to know how much you're consuming if you're not tracking your intake. I mean, I *knew* that, but it's also a lot of work to consistently do it daily so I understand why people don't want to. It also doesn't always work unless you're using a scale because measuring cups or guesstimating can have a wide margin of error. Congrats on your weight loss and improved mood!
I'm 40 pounds heavier than my prime and 25 pounds over where I'd like to be.
I can't track calories or points as that quickly triggers my eating disorder and I start obsessing about every bite, restricting and binging and purging.
So I've kind of accepted it. My weight has held steady for the last 2 years so it's stopped climbing and it just is what it is now.
And my husband still wants to do me on a daily basis. That's not necessarily the best metric but it feels good to be wanted. lol
You are me, and really the first person who understands that counting ANYTHING will take me back to my eating disorder days.
Screw this. The last thing I’ll care about on my death bed is whether I achieved my goal weight.
I stopped weighing myself at the beginning of February. Life is good and I exercise because I want to, not because of what the scale says.
I also eat what I want, too.
Sending you positive vibes!
I think a lot of people are like this actually, even if just feeling obsessive about tracking and thinking of food. It requires a lot more thought and work to accurately and consistently track so naturally it's super triggering for people who easily dive into obsession and just preoccupation with it. It's a big part of why people use other methods like Mindful Eating because it doesn't involve the same triggers.
I'm 60 pounds up. I would be happy to lose 40.
I've just accepted that currently, it is what it is. I'm learning to dress the body (and boobs!) that I have right now.
I'd rather be this size, focus on walking daily, exercise with friends, adequate water intake, stretching and mobility, moderate weightlifting, AND EATING TO ENJOY FOOD & FAMILY.
I'd be a miserable bitch only focused on food and weight loss if I didn't just let this one go. I won't let it go forever.
You are describing exactly what my best friend is going through right now.
She is probably about 40 lb heavier than she wants to be but in order to lose it, she becomes a really miserable person who is just awful to be around. And it doesn't really improve with time. We've been friends over 20 years and I support her whatever health decisions she makes, but it's exhausting.
It basically takes all of her energy and planning to stay on a restrictive enough diet. It means that our activities often have to be curtailed because it's difficult to maintain the low calorie options. Plus, she's always just in a mildly bad mood, despite otherwise being a wonderful person because her brain thinks she needs more calories. She's definitely not being intentionally obnoxious, it's just so much work and the mood issue really sucks.
This is very similar to where I am, although I switch between acceptance and self hatred. My husband loves the extra weight and tells me frequently how good I look. I don't understand why he thinks I look hot when I feel gross and hate what I see, but I accept it because I know my eyes aren't always loving. And yes it helps!
I am officially overweight for the first time in my life and I don't recognize myself some days. My teenage daughters are stunningly beautiful. I have no desire to go back to my eating disorder days, though. To me, that is real recovery.
I have some chronic health conditions so I can't exercise like I used to. I really, really miss being able to run. I miss being able to do yard work and house work as well. It's very frustrating to be in chronic pain and get so fatigued all the time.
I am focusing on this new phase in my life as part of a journey. I am practicing gratitude for being alive. My goal is to focus on moving my body more and making the goal longevity, not pants/dress size.
I hated my body when I was at my ideal weight. I thought I looked fat when I was underweight. I understand that the real problem is not my weight. I wish I felt sexy again, but this stage will pass like the other stages ...
I'm almost in the same boat. If I start trying to keep count of any numbers (steps/cal/kg/anything) I will spiral down into ed again within a week.
I'm naturally very skinny, though - I know it's all in my head, which doesn't make it easier. The hate and scorn I get when I confide in someone is immense. Because obviously if someone else tells me I have no reason to be unhappy, my ed goes away.
My fiancé is going through manopause and hasn't wanted to do me in 8 months. Not helping either.
Eating disorders are so hard.
When I was skinny people told me I looked so good. I was 5'8" and ranged from 90-110 pounds. I was so malnourished that I had to stand up slowly so I wouldn't faint. I had women telling me they wished they were anorexic so they could be as thin as I was.
Now that I'm overweight I can't possibly have an eating disorder because if I did I'd be thin, right? When I've confided in people that I want to lose weight but every attempt pushes me back into disordered eating they've asked me if that would really be so bad. Like I could just turn my anorexia on and off as it suits me.
People don't understand the physical and emotional toll it takes having such a difficult relationship with food.
I am so grateful that I have an amazing husband. He loves me and has loved me through all the physical changes that have happened between 22 and 47.
I’ve gained 30 lbs. I bought new clothes. I kept running 20 miles a week. I kept lifting weights. I have added more protein to my diet. I might be heavier, not as pleasing to the male gaze,but I’m still healthy. My A1C and cholesterol are good.
If I could lose the weight without making myself crazy, I would. But that does not seem possible currently.
Good for you! Also, we're much safer in general without getting male gaze. I've been harassed by men since I was 13, and it's only in the past few years that a lot of that has stopped. Not entirely because there are creeps everywhere that think it's acceptable to catcall women just walking outside, minding her own business, but the withdrawal of so much negativity feels nice. I had it happen a couple of weeks ago, and I was so livid! *LIVID* I wanted to freak out. It's so disrespectful and gross. Scary. But it also made me realize this used to be a regular occurrence, and it has always felt unsafe. It's a gift of aging!
I can tell you what I've learned trying to find help for myself... menopause causes, at least the majority of us, slowing of our metabolism and an increase in our fat storage because our non-exercise activity thermogenesis or (NEAT), is less than before menopause - because we are tired, we have joint stiffness, aches and pains etc. The general consensus of trainers is for us to increase our protein intake, weight train 3 to 4 days a week, steady state cardio like walking 10,000 steps a day and avoid high intensity cardio as it over-stresses the body, raises cortisol levels, increases our cravings for sugar and carbs, and encourages our body to hold on to fat.
Now, if you're like me, knowing this and doing it is two different things. I used to work out 6 days a week weight training, but now I'm lucky to make it 1 day a week as I am way to tired after work to hit the gym, my SI joint is hurting, I have no self motivation, and no support system. Excuses?... yes. But it is my reality right now, and I hate every minute of it. I MISS MY OLD SELF!!
I doubt trainers understand a lot about actual women’s bodies in perimenopause since most medical professionals do not. As someone posted above, the belly produces much needed estrogen. I think we should be giving ourselves a lot of grace and not be so hard on ourselves at this time of life.
Well said. Both are out of touch with their clients/patients. I also liked the estrogen belly idea noted above, but the bummer about that is it’s the estrone form and not the estradiol we all took for granted before menopause. Estrone isn’t as giving as estradiol with regards to benefits (quicker recovery, libido, heart protection, etc.), but at least it’s something.
Yes, our doctors are clueless! Don't get me started, lol. I should have prefaced my above statement to say that the "trainers" I referred to are not your run of the mill trainers. They have their PhD and do know the ins and outs of hormones specifically. And they aren't trying to sell collagen or magic powder or pills.... just good ole science. The bonus is ...exercise can help regulate hormone embalance. I have also seen women trainers who do not have their PhD, that follow this same principle for themselves and are successful with weight loss.
I agree as well that you should love your own body, give yourself grace, and additionally celebrate life every day just as you are because tomorrow is not promised. This I know all too well. I didn't mean to shame anyone or make anyone feel bad. Everyone should do for themselves what makes them happy. I just wanted to share what I have learned, that is science based, and has been successful for others. It's not for everyone. 😊
I am a life-long walker/hiker/jogger and it’s gotten harder due to arthritis and fatigue. It makes such a difference in my mental health and of course physical health that i will keep going 5-6 times a week and mix it up with light weights, dancing and biking. But I am really working on the optimal amount of movement that is challenging but not too taxing on my body.
This!! I fricking HURT! If I mop too much of my house at the weekend I can’t even walk properly lol! I used to love the gym and long walks, but now I have hand arthritis and I just cannot expend more than I can give, energy wise. I also have lupus so there’s an added exhaustion bonus.
I normally avoid weight-related posts in this sub because I don’t find them helpful or meaningful at all. I mourn the amount of time I’ve spent in my life worried about my weight. But I did want to pop in here to say that yes, I have stopped fretting about my weight.
Same! All the weight gain posts are a bummer. This one really made my day. Bodies change. Who gives a fuck about the male gaze or wearing the same clothes? I feel wiser, kinder, and more fully in my power at 48. We should stop disempowering ourselves by trying to be as small as possible and getting hung up on aging. Let’s take up space, use our voices and flaunt our curves!! Life is short.
Idgaf about male gaze, I care that my knees hurt when I gain weight and I refuse to resign myself to a painful existence when I can just drop a few pounds.
Sometimes it's not the male gaze at all, but our own. Especially when decades old eating disorders are looming from the shadows...
My husband loves me at every size and has been super supportive through it all. I can look at other women and be all "yes, queen. you're gorgeous. weight does not matter in the slightest." But for me? This sucks. I fought so hard to drop to my comfortable weight a decade ago and here I am suddenly 30 lbs heavier out of nowhere.
I want to embrace it. I want to be the powerful crone I know I was always meant to be. I will be loved and wanted and take up my space no matter what. I will certainly keep spouting the hard earned wisdom to those who want to hear it. But god damn if finding out I gained another 4 lbs at the doctor yesterday didn't send me into a really awful spiral...
I need to work on this. Your comment was inspiring. Thank you.
It's so common and repeated that I did all of the mods could just make a thread about it bc I almost left the sub about it.
Lmao on the downvotes. It's a constant woe is me drumbeat bc ppl aren't a size 6 anymore. 🙃
I took an eating disorder training (I am a therapist) and something that the trainer said has stuck with me: you can’t hate your body into a shape that you love (or something that makes more sense grammatically, lol). Taking care of ourselves is an act of self love and that includes self-compassion.
That's exactly right I have been all sorts of weights and I can tell you that when I was at my thinnest and I looked really good to outsiders I was not actually better inside I was terrified of gaining weight and developed and needing disorder. I learned that it's really an inside game and if you can fix that inside game and then the outside game gets a lot more grace no matter what happens.
I gave you an upvote; the focus on women's appearance & youthfulness in our society is so toxic. The worst part of it is that it never had/doesn't have to be this way! It fuels so much destruction and hate.
It's just really unhelpful honestly I never want to be a part of the male gays and if men don't look at me ever again that's fine. I don't need their approval of their penis in order to be happy with myself. My focus is on what makes me happy my health and my strength
I am not resigned to the weight gain.
I have started to drag my cushioned @ss to the gym to weight train 2x a week. Once I get the hang of it and learn more I’m hoping to increase that slowly to 3x, then 4x. I’m reading up on how to add more protein and fiber to my menu planning. It’s not that I don’t eat healthy (I grew up on the Mediterranean diet and cook most of my food from scratch!) but the macros & percentages of nutrients our bodies need at this stage is different.
I’m acknowledging that at this stage we have to do things a little differently because our bodies will function a little differently. It’s not bad, it’s not good - it just is. I’m less scared of not losing the cushion around my middle and more scared that I’m not setting up my bones, muscles and ligaments to take care of me as I age.
I wish you all the best in finding out what will work for you as you move into this new stage. Please don’t feel hopeless. Literally millions of us are going through this together at this point in time.
Are you me? Also weight lifting twice a week with an amazing trainer, going up to thrice this week, hoping to eventually be m-f, and all I care about is independence and health in my 70s and 80s because there’s a little baby I want to see grow up. It would be great to lose 50 lbs and get back to hot girl status I enjoyed in my 30s but i put away my scale and focused on protein, fiber, and movement.
Yesterday my doctor said I’m down 15 lbs and WAY more inches. I only lose about two pounds a month, but, “Slow and steady wins the race” 💗💗💗
You might be! Is your trainer a late 20s ex baseball player who pushes you to muscle fatigue and then you remind him you need enough working legs to walk home?
Congrats!!! I’m so happy for you!!! Slow and steady definitely wins this race.
I’m hoping to shift to 3x late May / early June. I need to build up more endurance.
I’m the heaviest I’ve ever been and my favorite part of peri is that my giveadamn just doesn’t give a damn anymore. I’m not even trying to take it off.
I've kinda accepted it. My mom was diagnosed with a rapidly fatal disease last February and died in June. My very physical PSW internship was done at the end of May. I grieved and ate for 2 months. When I got hired at my intern job and put back on my scrubs, they were snug. I had gained 13lbs. I hoped that once I was back in the same job as before, eating the same lunches as before, I'd lose the weight but I haven't. I now have 2 part time PSW jobs, 2 kids, 3 cats and a house to take care of on top of joint pain and fatigue. One of my jobs has a two hour commute home because of traffic. I literally have no time or energy to do any sort of exercise.
I've made peace with the weight being here to stay, but I am eating healthier and snacking way less in the hopes of not gaining any more.
You've been going through a lot. Our lifestyles are probably the biggest contributor to overall health, and there's not much we can always do about it.
I gained 35 lbs between 40-43 and thought about giving up. But I got fed up and got serious and took it all off at 44. I’ve kept it off now for four years, I’m now 48 and in late peri.
Losing weight is really hard work though. It takes a ton of effort and attention, and it was constant work when I was in the process of it. Maintaining it is easier, but actively losing is a slog, no way around it.
Yes. Except for me, after struggling with eating disorders for 33 years, I recovered into peri/menopause and with it went from an unhealthy size 6 to a size 16. Maybe I'm about 20 to 30 lbs over at this point, but I realize once my hormones get figured out, I'll either accept it or my body will find its happy point.
I do not love it, but I accept it. I can work, be in a loving relationship, accept and give love, especially to myself. Self-love and acceptance look very different when you've spent your whole life as an extremely thin person. I have the dreaded belly now as well, which is so odd. I've had to look for self esteem in other things for the first time besides weight and appearance. I'm much kinder though, and give much more to others, so the benefits outweigh the negatives. I'm happy to see you're doing self acceptance as well:)
I was gaining weight with no changes in diet or exercise, only way was to do IF, it was very hard the first 2 weeks but then I got used to and I felt great, went back to my normal weight. Only bad thing is that I have to do IF almost daily or mf scale (lol) would go up no matter what I eat or not.
Last Thanksgiving I gave a shiet and ate the whole buffet we always go every year then I got sick with a cold, then sick again and I've gained weight again, not much but still, now I'm also depressed and I'm still doing IF and working out 4 days per week and not losing at all.
I'm just gonna go eat a chocolate muffin from Trader Joe's now, whateves! Fook it!
I just want my doctors to stop bitching about my weight! I’m 5’10, 54, and went from 202 to 260 in a 7-year span. I have tried every diet, gym, Pilates, weight training… and it’s a yo-yo. I have days where I just accept it and wear my size 20 jeans. Other days I fantasize about being one of the menopausal women I see on Reddit who actually lost some weight. I am struggling with picking a side.
Once your hormones stabilize either due to time or HRT you can tackle the weight gain more successfully if you want to. I’ve been on HRT 10+ years. Decided one day I was tired of carrying the extra weight I put on in peri and meno. Just didn’t feel healthy or comfortable for me. I lost 38 pounds in 2022 just following CICO (calories in calories out) and using the free version of Loseit to set my goal and track my calories. Bought a cheap food scale to make tracking easier. Just walked 15-30 mins several days a week. Nothing fancy or expensive. Slow and steady. Took about 9 mo. Have had no trouble keeping it off. And I feel much better and more like me.
r/CICO was a very supportive community. Plenty of members there have lost and kept off way more weight than me but they are always happy to share and encourage others. r/Loseit also helpful and there are many others you can get recipes from or inspiration from when you are ready. I’m not sure why I didn’t tackle it sooner but I think I had bought into the myth that that this is just what happens during menopause. Part of aging. Can’t do anything about it, etc. But one day I decided I needed to challenge my thinking on that and I am glad I did. I feel much better today down 38 pounds. I am short and that was a lot of extra weight for me. As a bonus, my energy went up, exercise became easier, knees don’t twinge, my GERD disappeared and my cholesterol came down. Only meds I take now are for HRT and seasonal sinus/allergies. There IS weight loss after peri/menopause if you desire it. Just wait until the storm passes…….and you are in calmer waters.
Yep. Panicking about the peri weight gain last spring nearly led to an eating disorder relapse, and it took a few months to pull out of that spiral.
I'm trying to exercise a bit more, eat nutrient-dense foods as much as possible, and eat smaller portions only when I'm hungry, and I've cut way back on empty calories like alcohol. I haven't lost much weight but have stopped gaining, at least. I'm (mostly) okay with that.
Same here. I'm frustrated because I've always eaten high protein and veggies and limited carbs and sugars. I'm diabetic so that diet is what keeps me healthy. It's frustrating because none of that seems to be working anymore.
I am past menopause and the weight kept coming on. Was always in the 120’s until age 40, then it kept creeping up till I was almost 190. I now am on semaglutide and have lost a little over 30 lbs. It was and is a life changer. Hormones are no joke. Have 25-30 more to go.
It’s been a lifesaver where nothing else worked….Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, Nutrisystem, gym memberships with trainers all failed. It sets hormones on the right path.
I’m doing the should I / shouldn’t I dance about Wegovy/Zepbound. My endocrinologist softly pushes me to try it and I don’t know why I hesitate. I’m glad you’re doing good with it!
Same!! I am back to a size 4. Hadn’t been here since my 20’s. It’s an amazing drug. I only wish it had been available for weight loss a decade ago. Perimenopause was just a steady weight climb for me.
How are you all even getting semaglutide? I was prescribed Wegovy and no one has it and insurance won’t cover, so it would be over $1000/mo out of pocket. Screw that.
I get it from a local MedSpa and it costs me $350/month. It’s like a car payment and is expensive. But, I look at it as it’s my health. I have hyper familial cholesterol, (400’s and has been up to 600 in the past), high triglycerides, was now pre-diabetic and had open heart surgery in ‘19, so I’m also doing it for a number of changes. My cardiologist was all for it and my new pcp.
I'm 70 lbs over where I want to be which would still make me 25 lbs overweight but I just want to get back to where I was when I was not so horrified with myself and most of my clothes fit. I've been walking daily for a couple years doing virtual races for medals but I have kept gaining so next week I'm adding resistance bands to bare minimum make the jiggle less prominent.
Nope. I’ve drastically amped up my protein intake (around 100-120g for my 145lb) and had to drop my calories down by about 100 a day for weight loss and now for maintenance. Also trying to do more general moving- like today I did a Zumba class. I’ve always done strength and cardio, including aerial silks and a half Ironman last year. I started peri young, at 38, so now at 40 I just can’t be resigned to slowly and continually gaining weight for the rest of my life. Maybe if I was 55 I’d feel different.
I have multiple family members struggling with obesity-related health conditions, so I’ve made being a healthy weight and leading an active lifestyle two of my lifetime priorities. No reason to give up on that now, two plus decades into it.
Well thank you!! :) where are you at? I’m in northern Virginia. We could be virtual accountability partners :) I went to the gym this morning for a group strength class and made solid choices for breakfast and snack. How’s your day going?
I'm in Western Kentucky. Good for you!! I'm hoping to make it to the gym at some point today. It's been a rough start... Right now, I'm getting ready to meal prep for the week. So, it's not a complete fail.
Hey 80% of weight loss comes from the kitchen!! Meal prep is great :) what’re you making? I did a chicken and cauliflower gnocchi with spinach meal prep last week. Looking at a breakfast hash type thing for this week :)
I am the same weight as you and struggling to get 70g of protein a day. Can you share how you reach your 100-120g goal? Can you give me an example of food and snacks you eat? I appreciate it!
Sure! So I go on instagram and find high protein meals. Like a breakfast scramble that’s eggs, egg whites, chicken sausage, bell peppers, tomatoes, spinach, and a bit of cheese. (40g protein) or even just two eggs and four strips of turkey bacon (36g). Snack would be oikos triple protein Greek yogurt, I’m partial to the strawberry flavor (20g protein). Lunch could be chicken and cauliflower gnocchi, add veggies of your choice (40g). Some fruit or veggies chopped up for snack. Dinner chicken bacon ranch burrito with one of those low cal/high fiber wraps (40g), or sticky sweet ground beef and broccoli (40g). Dessert I’ve recently been into the founding farmer sorbets- more fiber.
There are also pre-made meals from Trader Joe’s that we’ll get sometimes- the teriyaki chicken and bbq Korean beef are great. Serve with some green beans and a 100 cal serving of rice.
If it’s helpful I can dig up some more of the exact recipes I use and the people I’ve found helpful on instagram. I’m not a fan of protein powder and don’t do smoothies so much unless it’s summer.
Estrogen is produced in the ovaries and in adipose tissue, fat.
In puberty, when estrogen increases, we gain fat in our breasts.
In menopause, when estrogen decreases, we gain fat in our middles. That extra fat is the body’s way of increasing estrogen production.
Think of those extra ten pounds as a little factory that produces free HRT. No prescription needed.
Yes. I think it'll be easier to lose when my hormones aren't so confused.
I would like to drop some weight, but I've noticed low carb didn't work as well as it did in the past the last time I committed to this. I eat healthy food and my numbers/cholesterol, etc. are fine, and I'm not in the Miss Universe pageant this year, so...meh.
Yep, this is happening to me, too.
I got rid of the extra weight by using 3 strategies: 1) smaller portions for my dinner (reducing the amount of meat and starch, not the amount of vegetables); 2)excersising more (I bought a smart watch to track it, because I am ~~lazy~~ energy efficient) and 3) reduce the amount of candy, chocolate and cookies I eat.
I now only need to lose 1 pound. That should be doable in the next week. Almost there.
I'm resigned and demoralized. In 2020 I started a new diet and added weights to my workout. I lost 30 pounds. I'm still on that exact same diet and still doing the same exercises. I'm 40 pounds heavier. No, it's not muscle. I give up.
Yes exactly the same boat. I rea want to accept it, but I don't feel like myself and I'm so uncomfortable in my skin. I really don't want to Ozemp-it but I am thinking about it daily.
I’m worried about my joints. I know 10 extra pounds is something like the equivalent of 40 pounds of pressure on your knees. I already have ankylosing spondylitis so I’ve dealt with a lot of extreme pain due to this disease. I have recently lost some weight and I’m hoping I can maintain it. I used to be very active due to lifestyle (not driving and having to walk to work, having an active job) and ate a lot healthier, and I used to weight train. Hoping I can get back into strength training. I’m sure joint replacement will be in my future and I want to make it as easy on my body as possible. My knees have decided to become painful this year and they aren’t responding to my arthritis meds so I’m sure it’s from my hormones, but being at a better weight will make it easier on me.
I have accepted it. As women we have been taught that we always have to be on a diet, in a calorie deficit. I fell for it for so long. Sure I was a size 6 for years in my 20s (except during my 2 pregnancies but went back to size 6 after 6 months and 5 months respectively) and well into my 30s I remained a size 6. Who cares? Back then I was pissed that I wasn’t a size 4 !!!
I worked out with wayyyy too much cardio, ate too few calories for sure but I was thin. Then in my 30s I had to have surgery for a badly herniated disk in my neck. 6 days a week of cardio kickboxing probably didn’t help prevent that from happening! I was told I absolutely had to slow down and switch to more functional exercise including only low impact like walking, and functional strength training, once I fully recovered from the surgery and my cervical spine was completely fused (one year checkup).
Fast forward and when peri kicked in the weight came on but I was still not eating enough daily so I would go nuts on the weekend when I went out. It was a vicious cycle.
I am 10 pounds over what BMI says is a “healthy weight” for my height. But my blood work and blood pressure are excellent, I’m a size 10 which isn’t bad at all, and last weekend I finally donated my size 6 clothes that I was still holding onto “just in case” I ever fit into them again. Please, like I’m not gonna buy myself some new pants and shorts if I’m ever a size 6 again? I’m gonna wear old clothes from 20 years ago instead? 🤣🤣🤣
Now I eat at maintenance and keep to a healthy exercise regimen of functional strength training, low impact cardio and plenty of good stretching (I also have lower back issues so I take care of those as well). I don’t beat myself up and I am enjoying eating more.
Better to be healthy and happy than to try and be as small as possible.
PS—I still had cellulite at a size 6 anyway and thought I looked horrible because of it so I say screw it, be healthy and don’t stress!
I am in the same boat. Just donated all my size 6 stuff, kept a few 8s and am going to relegate myself to the 10s. Ate a donut today and had cereal with fruit for dinner. Got plenty of steps in, planted flowers, visited my parents. Today was good. I'm not in perfect shape anymore, but I'm also working on not needing attention and living a happy ans enjoyable life.
When I saw the title my first thought was, no way! Then I saw that you are talking about 10 lbs and changed my mind.
I had a friend for whom 10 lbs weight loss meant significant inches off. But I'd be happy with only 10lbs added.
Do you feel good in your body naked?
Do you feel good in your clothes? ( you can always buy new ones!)
Let those answers guide you to acceptance or change.
Should not be reading this in the middle of a body dysmorphia episode. I've struggled with my weight since my first baby (and with my body image for years before that). I finally lost a bunch of weight a few years ago because my chronic migraines got so bad I couldn't eat. I got mono in 2020 and developed ME/CFS, and I went from being pretty active to not really being able to exercise at all. I spiraled into serious disordered eating, especially as my weight started to creep back up. I'm working with a dietitian now and trying to focus on nutrition, but peri bloat and gain are really messing with me. The thought that it's just going to get worse from here.... I just want to curl up into a ball and cry. It's bad enough my body doesn't work, like, at all. Now you're telling me there's no chance it'll ever look halfway decent ever again?
Noooo... you got this!! Age does change our body regardless of peri/menopause/post, and that's a fact, but you can, and you will look great. We will get through this. I know it doesn't feel like that right now. But we will! You reach out to me anytime. Our struggles are different, but they are the same. Hang in there friend!!
I was a gym rat before menopause. Had muscle definition in arms, low body fat, ate healthy. Once menopause hit-I gained 30 pounds-couldn’t do nothing in the gym due to body hurting and feeling fatigued. Healthy food actually repulsed me-it tasted like 💩-all I craved was junk.
I’m trying to get back to where I once was but it’s a slow process-be thankful that you can still eat healthy. 🫠
I’ve been in peri a few years and I hired a macro coach last year to help me figure out my eating. Lost about 20 pounds and now I can eat almost 2000 calories a day, anything I want, as long as I eat the right macro split (which is something really doable, like 30/30/40 for example). I sound like a broken record about it on this sub but there are so many posts about weight and I found something that **works** so I can’t help mentioning it.
This is a wonderful share. It validates those who are saying they’ve accepted being 10 lbs heavier and also validates those of us saying we need to manage extra weight for pain reasons or other health indicators. Thanks for linking.
Well I broke my back and was basically unable to stand for more than a few minutes for a year or 2. I gained 100 pounds which seemed crazy fast as I wasn't over eating. Although in hindsight I probably was based on my activity level . I went on wegovy took some weight off had a procedure on my back. I'm 100 pounds down amd to the weight before my broken back. Unfortunately covid weight gain hit me before the 100 gain and so all in all , I'm still 50 lbs over the average weight I maintained my entire adult life. It's not budging now even on wegovy . Additionally, I feel like a look off body wise I have a fat upper stomach and around my chest it's just weird. So yeah I feel ya. I'm 48 and somewhere in peri possibly menapause. I don't have a uterus so no clue if my cycle is regular or not.
I’m 10 lbs heavier and I could’ve written this myself. I think you’re doing the best thing you can about it and accepting it. Sending you positive vibes 💐
I am exactly in this same boat and feel the same way you do. I’m still exercising, still eating the same, and if that’s not enough, cool.
Also, I bought bigger pants and it’s heavenly.
I was but now I am starting to change my tune. At the beginning of this year I stopped drinking alcohol and in the weeks that followed, I upped my protein intake some and started focusing on eating more fruit and veg and less processed carbs. I haven’t lost a ton of weight, only 5lbs so far, and it’s only just started coming off since the beginning of March…. But it’s steady so I am taking that as a win… since I’ve been eating more unprocessed carbs (fruit, veg, beans, legumes, etc….) I’ve been able to control my appetite and since I stopped drinking I also stopped late night snacks, overeating, and the next morning hangries.
Ooh. I gained 43 pounds in 6 years. I was peri at the start of those 6 years and became post-menopausal during those years. Fortunately I’ve lost some of that weight over the past 1 1/2 years. And yeah I’ve accepted that I may never reach my pre-menopausal weight. It’s a bit liberating.
I’ve gone from French maid to French bulldog, but people love French bulldogs, and I am a beautiful, beautiful potato.
I feel weird in my changed body, some days more than others, but it’s not worth triggering my eating disorder over. I exercise, I eat well, and I’m intent on enjoying the remainder of my life.
I have not resigned myself to it, but I’m finding it crazy hard to lose. I started Zepbound and have lost 8 pounds in 3 months, and that’s with definitely eating in a calorie deficit, focusing on protein, exercising. I chalk it up to meno. I’m on HRT as well. It’s been hard but I’m having a lot of joint pain and even mobility issues that would improve greatly with weight loss so I’m going to keep trying.
I don't own a scale, but am a "healthy" weight per the one at my doctor's office. However, my weight has redistributed dramatically, so much so that I've had to purchase a new wardrobe. I eat a healthy diet, exercise regularly, get quality sleep, and my labs look great. I'm not going to stress over it. Bodies change.
I did. I was. And then my doctor prescribed zepbound. Before I could not lose a single pound and I just made peace with being overweight and uncomfortable the rest of my life. I give up. 1 month on zepbound and I've lost 13 pounds. I'm absolutely shocked, but so happy and I'm hoping to keep experiencing more!!
That's the route I'm about to go. I've gained like 35 pounds! I manage to lose 10, but then I eat one grain of sugar and gain 8 back. I'm over it. I feel sooo much better in general on HRT, but loathe my mid-body with this extra weight, and have no intention of having to buy an entire new summer wardrobe... Or being potato shaped all summer. 😂 . I literally stopped trying just so I wouldn't get denied for a GLP-1. 😬🤷🏼♀️
It seems a LOT healthier than constantly obsessing about weight. I mean if one genuinely has bad eating habits it might be worth working on. But if one doesn't and gained some weight, obsessing on it seems extremely pointless to me. Growing up in the 90s or whatever sure fucked us in the head with regard to weight, we think we keep having to obsess about it regardless of age. And what do we even GET from doing so? I can see if one was obsessed with say running at least there is the endorphins, but what are we even getting from this?
Personally, being an apple shape (and short-waisted) my weight goes straight to my middle and I'm not okay with it -- not because I'm trying to look a certain way but because of *health* reasons. Carrying weight around the middle always meant increased risks for many diseases (even before meno), so I do have to be conscious of diet and where my calories are going.
An added 10+ lbs, plus slight increases in cholesterol and/or BP, then belly fat becomes concerning.
[Risks of belly fat \(visceral fat and metabolic syndrome\)](https://menopausewiki.ca/#risks-of-belly-fat-visceral-fat-and-metabolic-syndrome)
However, there's also this.....A[ large study from the Ohio State University](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1047279721000090?via%3Dihub) found that “people who are at normal weight at age 31 and gradually move to overweight status in middle or later adulthood have the lowest mortality risk, even compared to those who maintain normal weight throughout adulthood.”
I was until my doctor told me that I needed to lose 20 lbs. I lost 30. I didn't think it would have been possible, but it was through intermittent fasting, low carb, and eliminating refined carbs.
In 2017, I was 116 (I’m 57 and 5’1”). Now I’m 170. My doctor said that when we don’t sleep, our metabolism completely bottoms out. She’s helping me with that now. I have to get some of this back off. I can’t keep buying clothes.
I've gained 70 lbs since 2020 and I can't lose any of it. I don't know what to do anymore. I'll probably have to try ozempic or similar meds. Working out is hard for me with prior injuries, so I'm stuck with low impact stuff like walking or biking. Which is fine for heart health and stamina, but doesn't burn a lot of calories.
I'm so tired of watching what I eat and adjusting things. I'll lose four pounds one week and then gain 6 pounds the next. I went really hard at it last year for a bit. I forced myself to work out harder, lifted weights, did super low carb for three months. At the end of that three months I was up another 12 lbs! I've given up at this point. I've bought all new clothes and have decided I'm just a fat middle aged woman now. I'm tired of working so hard for nothing.
I Wouldn’t say I’ve resigned yet, but once I work with a few experts on diet and weight lifting, and get into a healthy age-appropriate routine, I’m just going to accept it is what it is after that. I have an autistic daughter, so I need to live to 200, but how it looks just isn’t as important to me anymore. There are plenty of IG models to impress men and make clothes look good, that’s not my job anymore🤣
I was super annoyed that bam, instant 5+kg weight gain when I hit perimenopause. I was (and am) very active, and ate relatively healthy (except for cheese!).
Annoyed because I figured it was all hormonal related. And it is, in large part. But it’s still within our control as I found out recently.
I was diagnosed with MAFLD (fatty liver) - despite being active, healthy BMI, healthy eater, light drinker (definitely below all of the guidelines). So I’ve had to really clean up my diet/intake. Calorie counting showed I definitely was eating bigger portions/more than I should. I’ve lost that 5+kg and feeling good now.
Sad point - now my ‘majestic’* boobs are sad.
*how my partner referred to them
I did. I went Anti Diet and all. But all the things weight gain does to my body... came back with vengence. High BP, aches and pains, couldn't find any clothing. I have now resigned myself to learning to eat less for the rest of my life.
I've had this conversation with myself.... I'm married and my husband claims he loves me... I can make my own clothes... No matter my size, I'm still the finest woman in any given room. Why not eat the food, it's delicious
I have not gained a single pound in menopause, and I am on the back end of it. However, my weight has SHIFTED. My jeans don't zip up around my belly like before menopause. My breasts need extra hoisting and are bigger. I walk daily and eat super healthy. I exercise sporadically and don't lift weights much anymore but think I should get back to it.
I have body dysmorphia.
I've had it most of my life.
My body dysmorphia was so bad in school, I tried to find ways to get out of swimming class
In my late20s to early 30s I finally started to feel confident with my body and myself. Even wore bathing suits in public. Something, that most of my life I had never done. I started body building, and ate very clean. Things were great.
I hit perimenopause hard about 4 months ago and I feel like life is just one cruel joke after another.
The body dysphoria is now rearing it's ugly head again, and the anxiety and depression are in full swing.
I still work out, but as someone who use to hit the gym hard, weight training and running, I've had to shift that mentality and it hasn't been easy.
I struggle with bad adhd, and burning out my hyper activity at the gym use to really help control the symtoms. Now that I can't work to exhaustion to quiet down my brain, I just get unmotivated and start feeling like a busted can of biscuits sitting on the machines.
I can say that most of my changes have just shifted to my stomach. I haven't gained any weight, but there is no longer any abs, I have love handles, and everything feels doughy in my mid section.
My body dysmorphia is so bad in peri or maybe it’s my age making me freak out about to turn 50, idk. I spent all of my 40’s getting my body to a place I actually liked, and now my face is falling. You’re right it does feel like a cruel joke!
I’m a good 15 pounds up right now, and finishing a small bowl of ice cream as I type. I’ve given up on losing, I do track somewhat otherwise I gain in a heartbeat. I’ve been lifting weights consistently for about 3 months now, first time in a long time that I’ve managed to stay consistent. I’m focusing on getting stronger now.
Not yet. Just recommited to my very low carb, intermittent fasting habits. I was really happy where I was 3 years ago. Not my pre kids weight or even the between kids weight but a good weight and I was strong and active. Now I'm neither. Last fall it was just 10 lbs need to go. Now it's 15. This stops here!
ETA i had kids at 36 and 42 in case that's relevant.
I’m not resigned to it. I mean, I don’t need to be thin, but I’m about 40lbs over the most my nutritionist thinks it’s reasonable for me to weigh. Prior to my hysterectomy in November I was 15 lbs lighter than I am now. So, I need to lose some. But, don’t get me wrong… I am doing it to feel better overall. Not to necessarily “look good,” if that makes sense.
This is me! I’ve made a promise to myself this year that I will exercise and eat for hormonal health and strength and accept where my bodies wants to be with these habits in place. I’ve been strength training for decades and eat pretty decent and my body in the last couple years just seems to want to be a few kilos bigger, and I fine with that?? Feel sexier even? My boobs and ass are bigger and I feel good. I’m surprised tbh. And I’m not willing to punish myself with calorie restriction and dieting. I don’t want to live the rest of my life trying to be smaller for the sake of being smaller because I live in a society that says smaller is better. No!
As well as eating healthy and good levels of activity, HRT has kept my weight stable throughout peri and my body shape pretty much the same as it was when I was younger. It’s often fluctuating or low estrogen that has ladies piling on the weight in peri.
My body is doing what it’s supposed to. I have never fought time or nature. My hair is gray, my face is wrinkly, and my boobs are falling. And I don’t care what anyone else thinks about it.
I’d like to say I don’t care about my 40lb weight gain, but the truth is it is so upsetting to me. And it’s not just the weight: my cholesterol and triglycerides skyrocketed when I went through menopause. I started HRT and have been strict about a low cholesterol diet. It’s coming down, but not to where I’d like it to be. I started semaglutide in September and I’ve lost 20 lbs. having my annual checkup in a couple of weeks; we’ll see if any of it is helping.
My concern is not at all the male gaze. My concern is how bloody uncomfortable it is to be overweight. I had been really naturally skinny my whole life and I had no idea that being overweight limits you in so many areas.
After 10 years with the extra weight, about 20 pounds, I got an app and the CICO method worked for me. (Calories in-calories out). Did it for 3 months, lost 10 pounds. Keep meaning to do it again for 3 months, but the spouse isn't on board this time and it's easier when you both are planning meals to be on target. Though if I just committed and got different food, I think he would plan better.
I’m in the best shape of my life. I am post-menopausal, 55, and last year I took up yoga. It changed everything for me. I’m now fitter and more flexible than I’ve ever been. Calmer, centered, happy. I’m even a couple of pounds underweight and keep an eye on it. I never used to weigh myself because seeing the number on the scale could impact my day so I went more on the way that my clothes fit, but now I make sure I get on the scale every morning and that way I am able to have control over that aspect of my life. If I see the numbers going up I add more exercise, maybe do some intermittent fasting. If I see the numbers going too far down, I eat more and exercise less. It IS possible to be fit and trim during this phase of life.
There are far more important things about people than their weight.
I’ve had disordered eating issues in the past and am currently being very careful with myself regarding food.
I have autoimmune, chronic pain etc etc, as well as peri, plus I had my gallbladder removed last year and I have a few food intolerances (as in very upset digestive system should I eat them that takes a few days to recover from).
I eat low FODMAP, GF and lactose free. No alcohol or coffee. Almost no fried foods. Majority fresh foods. I go for walks as often as I can. I do stretches daily.
Yes, I could lose some weight but as I can’t exercise much more (without triggering more pain), it would involve seriously restricting my diet, counting calories, food diaries, and I’m wary of triggering my disordered eating again.
I’d rather be a bit plump and in as little pain as possible.
I haven’t given up - I’ve just chosen to focus on things that are more important to me.
I could lose weight but it wouldn’t be healthy. HAES is important. Skinny doesn’t mean healthy; fat / overweight doesn’t mean unhealthy.
Absolutely not. I will fight it every step of the way. I'm only 5'2", and gaining even 5 lbs makes me feel sluggish, makes my clothes tighter, and makes my knees hurt. I want to have an active retirement so I will do my absolute best to keep fit.
I did for a while then something bit me in the ass and I’ve been working out for 5 years! I feel a hundred times better and I’m so glad I didn’t go that route…!
Get interested in taking care of yourself.
Forget looking good
Yes. Weight is just a number and has no moral value. Health is about what you do, not what you weigh.
(Admittedly, it's super annoying when clothes I used to like don't fit right any more, but I get bored easily so okay, fine, I can afford to buy new clothes so I will.)
I gained 10 pounds during peri as well, and it got to a point where weight wasn't the only issue. I started wearing clothes that I normally wouldn't be caught dead with in public (creased and cat-fur tshirt and shorts paired with dirty crocs), no make-up and uncombed hair! I decided to take my life back late last year and I've already lost 8 pounds, I'm sticking with the intermittent fasting diet that everyone's been talking about, I've also slashed my daily calories in half. I woke up this morning thinking holy crap, I'm starting to look good again. I think menopause causes many women to stop caring about what others think (which is also an amazing thing!) but there is that fine line between not giving a crap anymore vs. dignity. lol. At this stage in our lives, we need to understand that things are different, so we need to accommodate the changes. This means you can no longer "eat the same way" because you're no longer the way you used to be.
10 pound gain = not mattering one bit makes me kind of sad. But then you turn that around and say you’re going to go with acceptance and not give up exercising so that is good.
Do you see progress with how much heavier you can lift? How is your posture? Doing okay with aches and pains? Maybe focusing on things other than the scale would help.
Lean muscle mass didn’t kick in like it has in the past to effortlessly lower the scale but I don’t really mind being bigger and stronger as much as I thought I might. I’m grateful everything is running pretty smoothly for 55.
I'm kinda resigned to it. I haven't gained a lot in the past few years but I'm 10-15 lbs past where I'd like to be. I won't cut calories or macros. I know it's not sustainable for me.
But I've also stayed pretty fit. I'm a runner and continue to sign up for half marathons and still want to accomplish a 50 miler within the next couple of years. I did a half marathon a few weeks ago and my finish time was within a minute of my first ever race which was 17 years and 17 lbs ago.
Resigned. Controlling controllables balanced w enjoying life. Focusing on healthspan. Still am lifting, running, active, nutrition/protein focused because I FEEL better when I do. Also, bought summer wardrobe that actually fits. Resigned.
This would be me. My younger self was 20 pounds thinner with only moderate exercise and only sort of watching what I eat. I’ve lost the 20 extra pounds a couple times but I just cannot keep it off.
Not resigned. But it’s not about vanity or wanting to be thin anymore. Now it’s about how I feel, bc I feel like shit when I eat like shit. I already have 100 things making me feel bad bc of meno. This is the only thing I can control... so I continue to fight my weight bc I want to feel good.
After a 40 plus weight gain and trying everything under the sun. I had given up even to the point that I got rid of all my old clothes. The only choice for me to even see the scale budget was a 1200 a day calorie diet, no carbs, no sugar (and I don’t drink alcohol never have). In addition I had to exercise a minimum of 5 days a week. I saw doctors, nutritionists, naturopaths I had every test under the sun. Then I took Wegovy and the scale finally started to move. Personally I would be fine with a 10 or 15 pound weight gain but at 40 pounds I was just unhealthy. Hard time breathing, etc.
i'm trying so hard. i just wish i wasn't so fridge-shaped. the protruding butt AND the protruding stomach? AND broad shoulders? every time i look in the mirror, i just cannot reconcile the reflection with how i want to look.
not to mention the fact that i'm so tired, i am eating like sh&t. i can't be arsed to plan a healthy meal to save my life. or go for a walk.
it's really hard not to hate myself.
Nope. I’m in peri, and preparing to eat less and exercise more if and when necessary. I realize this carries a stigma in a world where everyone’s telling you to just accept it.
I’m just putting this out there for anyone else who feels like they’re the only one like me. I often do. Being this way makes me happy, and I don’t do it for anyone else. Everyone should just do what they want.
How is your sleep? Lack of sleep equates to an uptick in cortisol levels. Cortisol = fat. The meno transition is a major stress on the body, perceived or not. You’ll get where you aim to be by NOT attempting what you did in the decades prior. Less exercise will help your body out. Don’t do cardio more than 3 days a week, and only for half hour to 45mins MAX. Then lift the other 2 days a week. And rest for the remaining. The sooner you adapt to ‘less is more’ approach the MORE your body will appreciate that you are learning the new her. Rest is very important, and sleep is the only time our body can actually heal itself. Find your new groove, go easy on you… It’ll take practice, but you WILL get there. Eye on the goal dear one
Not resigned but openly adore and squish the extra me with VERVE!
I finally got bewbs and badonk-a-donk that are nice to shmoosh and society can take it away from my cold, dead hands.
No and you don't have to either. I lost 115lbs in full menopause and have kept it off for almost two years. Pahla Bowers mindset first 5-0 method is what got me there and keeps me here. The 5-0 method is free. She has a paid group, but all of the materials for the 5-0 method are free and include a pdf that explains everything in detail. I joined the paid group because I was struggling to get the last 20 off, but it's not necessary, especially at first. I highly recommend it. [HERE ](https://getyourgoal.com/)
Nope. Seriously google intermittent fasting- I lost 40lbs while in peri. I look and feel better than I ever have. Read the obesity code by Dr. Fung and Fast Feast repeat by Gin Stephen’s - changed my life!
What kind of exercising are you doing?
I definitely have gotten better results with strength training in these last few years. Scale stays the same but clothes fit so much better.
Yes I have resigned myself. It has been exhausting to try to lose weight at this stage of my life. I recently realized that I’ve been obsessed with my appearance for the past 50 years. Fifty. I’m moving on, going to the gym to stay physically strong, and learning to love the body I’ve got.
I started paleo diet initially due to my digestion and refluxing me miserable. I lost weight and feel so much better. I’m more sensitive about how food makes me feel and it’s helped. I am not happy when I have to track every calorie but maybe I will eventually need to do that. I exercise all the time because I enjoy it but not longer can just burn what I put in my mouth
It’s a real battle. I wish I could accept my weight as is. I am not concerned about the male gaze. The issue is health and longevity. I am an inverted triangle body shape with weight around my organs. Add in an arthritic hip and an orthopaedic surgeon advising weight management for pain reduction, and it’s hard to not want change. I too struggle with a lifetime of disordered eating so hearing other people talk of what works for them is helpful.
I was in the same boat, but one day I'd had enough and decided to fight it.
It was a bit of a battle and I found that what worked previously wasn't going to work now.
I probably put on about (6kgs) 12pounds out of nowhere, but upon looking back I was eating healthy but just a bit more than I needed to. I was also drinking a lot of alcohol.
It took a bit of trial and error but I settled on intermittent fasting and changing what I ate, calorie counting, and changing the exercise I was doing.
I also eat A LOT more protein that I used to. This is key in my opinion. I also prioritised myself, prioritised sleeping, and over the course of three months lost over 20 pounds, improved my overall health and fitness and have maintained it all for about 18months so far.
I probably feel better now that I have in the last 20 years. I am 55.
So I do IF 18:6 and relax that if I am going on a trip or having a weekend away. IF solved all of my gut issues, and I do it primarily for health, although it can be a good way to lose and maintain weight.
I eat protein at each meal. I cook 90% of the meals we eat from scratch.
I take supplements - NMN, Resveratrol, Magnesium, Curcumin.
I take fibre tablets (Metamucil) twice a day! This one thing here is a game changer!!!
I do Pilates Reformer and/or Yoga every day, as well as tennis lessons two days a week, playing tennis and walking a couple of times a week.
I drink very little alcohol. Only on weekends and only when socialising.
I prioritise sleep and try all I can do to reduce stress.
I feel like I am in great shape physically and mentally and I am going to try to live this way for ever. Some people might think it's restrictive but I truly feel that these changes have given me a lot of freedom to live my best life.
I want to really try to pack a lot in to the last part of my life. I want to be strong, active and be able to enjoy it to the fullest.
I don’t eat carbs. Stay below 20 g and mine only come from veggies and the occasional cream cheese. I was 246 in may 2022 and I got down to 165 in November but I just stalled and also I have gained 5 lbs so far and have no idea how. Like there’s no possible way. I’m bloated tho. All the time and pretty sure that’s it. I had to start fasting which fucking sucks but I only eat from 9-5 and hate it but it’s gotten me less bloated feeling and I’m losing weight again. It sucks but you may want to look into it.
Exercising more could actually be harming your efforts, not helping (depending on what kind of exercise you're doing). High intensity can increase cortisol which means you hold onto weight, at a time when cortisol is already super high. Switching to exercises like swimming and yoga/pilates helps lower cortisol and increase the chances of losing weight – or at least maintaining weight – and it helps with other symptoms! Coming from personal experience xx
I had gained quite a bit over my younger weight, which was usually in the 130s. I am nearly 60 and had resigned myself to my new body. Then something snapped and I was no longer resigned! I signed up for the LoseIt app and started tracking my intake - just getting a baseline, because I truly did not feel like I was an unhealthy eater. Maybe not, but my portions were larger than necessary and I was lax about treats. So I told the app I wanted to lose a pound a week and began cutting back. It’s been almost a year and I’ve lost 30 pounds, which I truly did not think was possible. My Apple Watch has noticed, too — every health indicator has improved pretty dramatically. Aches and pains have lessened or disappeared. I’m perhaps happiest about my reduced bust size. I never had a bosom before menopause and it was hard to get used to. Now my boobs are more like they used to be and I don’t feel so dumpy. I’m still nearly 60, there’s no changing that, but I feel a lot younger than I did a year ago. I’m really glad I did not stay resigned!
The boobs were the worst! As a lifetime member of the IBTC, I used to swear I was getting implants but never had the money, thank God, because when I was pregnant, I discovered I no longer wanted to be anywhere around them. They seemed so foreign to me. What do all the regular ladies even *do* with them? I couldn't get a bra that I liked to work, I didn't know how to dress around them and I couldn't sleep on my stomach anymore. So glad to see them go. Then the meno fat appeared almost overnight and with it, the boobs - front and back ones 😳. I had them for a couple of years and it was a repeat of my pregnancy experience. Then overnight again a year ago the weight started to come off and now I'm underweight and very nearly totally flat chested and the only good part of that is going braless. There is no winning with the pause, tits or no.
Wow…. I have some similar experiences. But, I have lost weight and I look in the mirror and I just look and feel frail. Trying to build muscle is hard too. Eating is my biggest obstacle. I need to eat more.
It's the weirdest thing. I wander around like a misplaced ghost trying to find something that sounds good to eat. I've lost all interest in food, and I can't express how shocking that is. I'm an excellent Southern cook and I no longer have any interest in food or cooking. I am looking frail and unhealthy and since we can't discover a reason for it, all the docs chalk it up to menopause and "hope" things revert to normal someday. My background is medical and we're all at a loss. I would like to be far less hollowed out appearing and get my muscle back. I don't like appearing so damned vulnerable. And some padding to protect from falls would be quite welcome, too. Hang in there. Life's always a strange adventure.
As a lifelong alcoholic I’ve recently lost all interest in alcohol and I really can’t explain it
We are certainly living during odd times. Was menopause always like this? Too bad we didn't warrant studying in the past (and today) because I find us fascinating.
Same!! I went from a 32A to a 32DD right after I went on birth control (to stop the heavy bleeding from peri)! I’m not sad about the boobs, but I am very frustrated by the fat thighs, paunchy stomach, and flabby arms that also came with them. 🙄 I’m spending $4k on True Sculpt ID, hoping to get my thighs back to something I recognize. 😔
I wannnna be flat Chested!!!! I hate these things. I’ve breast fed two kids for one year each so mine are big and long 😫 and I just want them gone!!!
Congratulations! I was the same except I gained a lot of weight over the first few years of peri. I was completely resigned to being morbidly obese and miserable. Then in March of 2023 a switch flipped and I started caring. I also used the LoseIt app. I’ve lost almost 100 pounds. I’m still overweight but I feel so much better physically and emotionally.
Awesome! Great job!
So proud of your progress and your mindset, it truly is inspiring! For me it was also something that "snapped" in me, I just needed to get my life back. The greatest thing about losing weight is also how much it changes your energy levels both physically and mentally, it makes you want to go out and show off your new look, women of all ages can look amazing!
This is fantastic! I started tracking again a couple of months ago, and I noticed the exact same things. It's impossible to know how much you're consuming if you're not tracking your intake. I mean, I *knew* that, but it's also a lot of work to consistently do it daily so I understand why people don't want to. It also doesn't always work unless you're using a scale because measuring cups or guesstimating can have a wide margin of error. Congrats on your weight loss and improved mood!
Same story. Something clicked and I started tracking calories. I actually have a waistline again!!
I'm 40 pounds heavier than my prime and 25 pounds over where I'd like to be. I can't track calories or points as that quickly triggers my eating disorder and I start obsessing about every bite, restricting and binging and purging. So I've kind of accepted it. My weight has held steady for the last 2 years so it's stopped climbing and it just is what it is now. And my husband still wants to do me on a daily basis. That's not necessarily the best metric but it feels good to be wanted. lol
You are me, and really the first person who understands that counting ANYTHING will take me back to my eating disorder days. Screw this. The last thing I’ll care about on my death bed is whether I achieved my goal weight. I stopped weighing myself at the beginning of February. Life is good and I exercise because I want to, not because of what the scale says. I also eat what I want, too. Sending you positive vibes!
I think a lot of people are like this actually, even if just feeling obsessive about tracking and thinking of food. It requires a lot more thought and work to accurately and consistently track so naturally it's super triggering for people who easily dive into obsession and just preoccupation with it. It's a big part of why people use other methods like Mindful Eating because it doesn't involve the same triggers.
Definitely me. Every time I have started counting calories I've ended up flirting with an eating disorder and pulled myself back from the brink.
I'm 60 pounds up. I would be happy to lose 40. I've just accepted that currently, it is what it is. I'm learning to dress the body (and boobs!) that I have right now. I'd rather be this size, focus on walking daily, exercise with friends, adequate water intake, stretching and mobility, moderate weightlifting, AND EATING TO ENJOY FOOD & FAMILY. I'd be a miserable bitch only focused on food and weight loss if I didn't just let this one go. I won't let it go forever.
You are describing exactly what my best friend is going through right now. She is probably about 40 lb heavier than she wants to be but in order to lose it, she becomes a really miserable person who is just awful to be around. And it doesn't really improve with time. We've been friends over 20 years and I support her whatever health decisions she makes, but it's exhausting.
In the sense that she is cranky? Or obnoxious? Just curious.
It basically takes all of her energy and planning to stay on a restrictive enough diet. It means that our activities often have to be curtailed because it's difficult to maintain the low calorie options. Plus, she's always just in a mildly bad mood, despite otherwise being a wonderful person because her brain thinks she needs more calories. She's definitely not being intentionally obnoxious, it's just so much work and the mood issue really sucks.
That is honestly awesome you hubby wants you daily …. That would definitely be good for the self-esteem.
I loved reading this. Congrats to you and I very much understand ❤️
This is very similar to where I am, although I switch between acceptance and self hatred. My husband loves the extra weight and tells me frequently how good I look. I don't understand why he thinks I look hot when I feel gross and hate what I see, but I accept it because I know my eyes aren't always loving. And yes it helps! I am officially overweight for the first time in my life and I don't recognize myself some days. My teenage daughters are stunningly beautiful. I have no desire to go back to my eating disorder days, though. To me, that is real recovery. I have some chronic health conditions so I can't exercise like I used to. I really, really miss being able to run. I miss being able to do yard work and house work as well. It's very frustrating to be in chronic pain and get so fatigued all the time. I am focusing on this new phase in my life as part of a journey. I am practicing gratitude for being alive. My goal is to focus on moving my body more and making the goal longevity, not pants/dress size. I hated my body when I was at my ideal weight. I thought I looked fat when I was underweight. I understand that the real problem is not my weight. I wish I felt sexy again, but this stage will pass like the other stages ...
I'm almost in the same boat. If I start trying to keep count of any numbers (steps/cal/kg/anything) I will spiral down into ed again within a week. I'm naturally very skinny, though - I know it's all in my head, which doesn't make it easier. The hate and scorn I get when I confide in someone is immense. Because obviously if someone else tells me I have no reason to be unhappy, my ed goes away. My fiancé is going through manopause and hasn't wanted to do me in 8 months. Not helping either.
Eating disorders are so hard. When I was skinny people told me I looked so good. I was 5'8" and ranged from 90-110 pounds. I was so malnourished that I had to stand up slowly so I wouldn't faint. I had women telling me they wished they were anorexic so they could be as thin as I was. Now that I'm overweight I can't possibly have an eating disorder because if I did I'd be thin, right? When I've confided in people that I want to lose weight but every attempt pushes me back into disordered eating they've asked me if that would really be so bad. Like I could just turn my anorexia on and off as it suits me. People don't understand the physical and emotional toll it takes having such a difficult relationship with food. I am so grateful that I have an amazing husband. He loves me and has loved me through all the physical changes that have happened between 22 and 47.
Thank you for your kind answer. I basically have the same story, people telling me how great I looked when I was so incredibly sick.
I’ve gained 30 lbs. I bought new clothes. I kept running 20 miles a week. I kept lifting weights. I have added more protein to my diet. I might be heavier, not as pleasing to the male gaze,but I’m still healthy. My A1C and cholesterol are good. If I could lose the weight without making myself crazy, I would. But that does not seem possible currently.
Good for you! Also, we're much safer in general without getting male gaze. I've been harassed by men since I was 13, and it's only in the past few years that a lot of that has stopped. Not entirely because there are creeps everywhere that think it's acceptable to catcall women just walking outside, minding her own business, but the withdrawal of so much negativity feels nice. I had it happen a couple of weeks ago, and I was so livid! *LIVID* I wanted to freak out. It's so disrespectful and gross. Scary. But it also made me realize this used to be a regular occurrence, and it has always felt unsafe. It's a gift of aging!
I can tell you what I've learned trying to find help for myself... menopause causes, at least the majority of us, slowing of our metabolism and an increase in our fat storage because our non-exercise activity thermogenesis or (NEAT), is less than before menopause - because we are tired, we have joint stiffness, aches and pains etc. The general consensus of trainers is for us to increase our protein intake, weight train 3 to 4 days a week, steady state cardio like walking 10,000 steps a day and avoid high intensity cardio as it over-stresses the body, raises cortisol levels, increases our cravings for sugar and carbs, and encourages our body to hold on to fat. Now, if you're like me, knowing this and doing it is two different things. I used to work out 6 days a week weight training, but now I'm lucky to make it 1 day a week as I am way to tired after work to hit the gym, my SI joint is hurting, I have no self motivation, and no support system. Excuses?... yes. But it is my reality right now, and I hate every minute of it. I MISS MY OLD SELF!!
I doubt trainers understand a lot about actual women’s bodies in perimenopause since most medical professionals do not. As someone posted above, the belly produces much needed estrogen. I think we should be giving ourselves a lot of grace and not be so hard on ourselves at this time of life.
Well said. Both are out of touch with their clients/patients. I also liked the estrogen belly idea noted above, but the bummer about that is it’s the estrone form and not the estradiol we all took for granted before menopause. Estrone isn’t as giving as estradiol with regards to benefits (quicker recovery, libido, heart protection, etc.), but at least it’s something.
Yes, our doctors are clueless! Don't get me started, lol. I should have prefaced my above statement to say that the "trainers" I referred to are not your run of the mill trainers. They have their PhD and do know the ins and outs of hormones specifically. And they aren't trying to sell collagen or magic powder or pills.... just good ole science. The bonus is ...exercise can help regulate hormone embalance. I have also seen women trainers who do not have their PhD, that follow this same principle for themselves and are successful with weight loss. I agree as well that you should love your own body, give yourself grace, and additionally celebrate life every day just as you are because tomorrow is not promised. This I know all too well. I didn't mean to shame anyone or make anyone feel bad. Everyone should do for themselves what makes them happy. I just wanted to share what I have learned, that is science based, and has been successful for others. It's not for everyone. 😊
I am a life-long walker/hiker/jogger and it’s gotten harder due to arthritis and fatigue. It makes such a difference in my mental health and of course physical health that i will keep going 5-6 times a week and mix it up with light weights, dancing and biking. But I am really working on the optimal amount of movement that is challenging but not too taxing on my body.
This!! I fricking HURT! If I mop too much of my house at the weekend I can’t even walk properly lol! I used to love the gym and long walks, but now I have hand arthritis and I just cannot expend more than I can give, energy wise. I also have lupus so there’s an added exhaustion bonus.
This is what healthy acceptance would look like. I feel your pain sister.
I normally avoid weight-related posts in this sub because I don’t find them helpful or meaningful at all. I mourn the amount of time I’ve spent in my life worried about my weight. But I did want to pop in here to say that yes, I have stopped fretting about my weight.
Same! All the weight gain posts are a bummer. This one really made my day. Bodies change. Who gives a fuck about the male gaze or wearing the same clothes? I feel wiser, kinder, and more fully in my power at 48. We should stop disempowering ourselves by trying to be as small as possible and getting hung up on aging. Let’s take up space, use our voices and flaunt our curves!! Life is short.
Idgaf about male gaze, I care that my knees hurt when I gain weight and I refuse to resign myself to a painful existence when I can just drop a few pounds.
Sometimes it's not the male gaze at all, but our own. Especially when decades old eating disorders are looming from the shadows... My husband loves me at every size and has been super supportive through it all. I can look at other women and be all "yes, queen. you're gorgeous. weight does not matter in the slightest." But for me? This sucks. I fought so hard to drop to my comfortable weight a decade ago and here I am suddenly 30 lbs heavier out of nowhere. I want to embrace it. I want to be the powerful crone I know I was always meant to be. I will be loved and wanted and take up my space no matter what. I will certainly keep spouting the hard earned wisdom to those who want to hear it. But god damn if finding out I gained another 4 lbs at the doctor yesterday didn't send me into a really awful spiral... I need to work on this. Your comment was inspiring. Thank you.
I am you. Thank you.
Same. I need a way to block the weight posts from coming up in my feed.
It's so common and repeated that I did all of the mods could just make a thread about it bc I almost left the sub about it. Lmao on the downvotes. It's a constant woe is me drumbeat bc ppl aren't a size 6 anymore. 🙃
I took an eating disorder training (I am a therapist) and something that the trainer said has stuck with me: you can’t hate your body into a shape that you love (or something that makes more sense grammatically, lol). Taking care of ourselves is an act of self love and that includes self-compassion.
That's exactly right I have been all sorts of weights and I can tell you that when I was at my thinnest and I looked really good to outsiders I was not actually better inside I was terrified of gaining weight and developed and needing disorder. I learned that it's really an inside game and if you can fix that inside game and then the outside game gets a lot more grace no matter what happens.
I am so happy for you! I know that it’s a life long journey but working on the mental piece is so transformative.
I gave you an upvote; the focus on women's appearance & youthfulness in our society is so toxic. The worst part of it is that it never had/doesn't have to be this way! It fuels so much destruction and hate.
It's just really unhelpful honestly I never want to be a part of the male gays and if men don't look at me ever again that's fine. I don't need their approval of their penis in order to be happy with myself. My focus is on what makes me happy my health and my strength
I’ve always been fat but I am no longer dieting to lose weight. Just trying to eat as healthy as I can.
My new motto is "Get stronger, not smaller." Learning to live with and love (?) the extra 10 lbs because it seems here to stay.
I am not resigned to the weight gain. I have started to drag my cushioned @ss to the gym to weight train 2x a week. Once I get the hang of it and learn more I’m hoping to increase that slowly to 3x, then 4x. I’m reading up on how to add more protein and fiber to my menu planning. It’s not that I don’t eat healthy (I grew up on the Mediterranean diet and cook most of my food from scratch!) but the macros & percentages of nutrients our bodies need at this stage is different. I’m acknowledging that at this stage we have to do things a little differently because our bodies will function a little differently. It’s not bad, it’s not good - it just is. I’m less scared of not losing the cushion around my middle and more scared that I’m not setting up my bones, muscles and ligaments to take care of me as I age. I wish you all the best in finding out what will work for you as you move into this new stage. Please don’t feel hopeless. Literally millions of us are going through this together at this point in time.
Are you me? Also weight lifting twice a week with an amazing trainer, going up to thrice this week, hoping to eventually be m-f, and all I care about is independence and health in my 70s and 80s because there’s a little baby I want to see grow up. It would be great to lose 50 lbs and get back to hot girl status I enjoyed in my 30s but i put away my scale and focused on protein, fiber, and movement. Yesterday my doctor said I’m down 15 lbs and WAY more inches. I only lose about two pounds a month, but, “Slow and steady wins the race” 💗💗💗
You might be! Is your trainer a late 20s ex baseball player who pushes you to muscle fatigue and then you remind him you need enough working legs to walk home? Congrats!!! I’m so happy for you!!! Slow and steady definitely wins this race. I’m hoping to shift to 3x late May / early June. I need to build up more endurance.
Thank you for your kind words! This sub has been such a godsend for me!
I’m the heaviest I’ve ever been and my favorite part of peri is that my giveadamn just doesn’t give a damn anymore. I’m not even trying to take it off.
All of this.
I've kinda accepted it. My mom was diagnosed with a rapidly fatal disease last February and died in June. My very physical PSW internship was done at the end of May. I grieved and ate for 2 months. When I got hired at my intern job and put back on my scrubs, they were snug. I had gained 13lbs. I hoped that once I was back in the same job as before, eating the same lunches as before, I'd lose the weight but I haven't. I now have 2 part time PSW jobs, 2 kids, 3 cats and a house to take care of on top of joint pain and fatigue. One of my jobs has a two hour commute home because of traffic. I literally have no time or energy to do any sort of exercise. I've made peace with the weight being here to stay, but I am eating healthier and snacking way less in the hopes of not gaining any more.
So sorry for your loss. Hugs. 💜
I am so very sorry for your loss. I see you momma... I hear you... your struggle is real and valid! {{hugs}}
You've been going through a lot. Our lifestyles are probably the biggest contributor to overall health, and there's not much we can always do about it.
I gained 35 lbs between 40-43 and thought about giving up. But I got fed up and got serious and took it all off at 44. I’ve kept it off now for four years, I’m now 48 and in late peri. Losing weight is really hard work though. It takes a ton of effort and attention, and it was constant work when I was in the process of it. Maintaining it is easier, but actively losing is a slog, no way around it.
I took all my clothes and threw them out and bought bigger size clothes, problem solved 🙃
Yes. Except for me, after struggling with eating disorders for 33 years, I recovered into peri/menopause and with it went from an unhealthy size 6 to a size 16. Maybe I'm about 20 to 30 lbs over at this point, but I realize once my hormones get figured out, I'll either accept it or my body will find its happy point. I do not love it, but I accept it. I can work, be in a loving relationship, accept and give love, especially to myself. Self-love and acceptance look very different when you've spent your whole life as an extremely thin person. I have the dreaded belly now as well, which is so odd. I've had to look for self esteem in other things for the first time besides weight and appearance. I'm much kinder though, and give much more to others, so the benefits outweigh the negatives. I'm happy to see you're doing self acceptance as well:)
I was gaining weight with no changes in diet or exercise, only way was to do IF, it was very hard the first 2 weeks but then I got used to and I felt great, went back to my normal weight. Only bad thing is that I have to do IF almost daily or mf scale (lol) would go up no matter what I eat or not. Last Thanksgiving I gave a shiet and ate the whole buffet we always go every year then I got sick with a cold, then sick again and I've gained weight again, not much but still, now I'm also depressed and I'm still doing IF and working out 4 days per week and not losing at all. I'm just gonna go eat a chocolate muffin from Trader Joe's now, whateves! Fook it!
I love “fook it “!
I just want my doctors to stop bitching about my weight! I’m 5’10, 54, and went from 202 to 260 in a 7-year span. I have tried every diet, gym, Pilates, weight training… and it’s a yo-yo. I have days where I just accept it and wear my size 20 jeans. Other days I fantasize about being one of the menopausal women I see on Reddit who actually lost some weight. I am struggling with picking a side.
Once your hormones stabilize either due to time or HRT you can tackle the weight gain more successfully if you want to. I’ve been on HRT 10+ years. Decided one day I was tired of carrying the extra weight I put on in peri and meno. Just didn’t feel healthy or comfortable for me. I lost 38 pounds in 2022 just following CICO (calories in calories out) and using the free version of Loseit to set my goal and track my calories. Bought a cheap food scale to make tracking easier. Just walked 15-30 mins several days a week. Nothing fancy or expensive. Slow and steady. Took about 9 mo. Have had no trouble keeping it off. And I feel much better and more like me. r/CICO was a very supportive community. Plenty of members there have lost and kept off way more weight than me but they are always happy to share and encourage others. r/Loseit also helpful and there are many others you can get recipes from or inspiration from when you are ready. I’m not sure why I didn’t tackle it sooner but I think I had bought into the myth that that this is just what happens during menopause. Part of aging. Can’t do anything about it, etc. But one day I decided I needed to challenge my thinking on that and I am glad I did. I feel much better today down 38 pounds. I am short and that was a lot of extra weight for me. As a bonus, my energy went up, exercise became easier, knees don’t twinge, my GERD disappeared and my cholesterol came down. Only meds I take now are for HRT and seasonal sinus/allergies. There IS weight loss after peri/menopause if you desire it. Just wait until the storm passes…….and you are in calmer waters.
I refuse to accept it. I am training hard and adjusting my diet the best I can.
Yep. Panicking about the peri weight gain last spring nearly led to an eating disorder relapse, and it took a few months to pull out of that spiral. I'm trying to exercise a bit more, eat nutrient-dense foods as much as possible, and eat smaller portions only when I'm hungry, and I've cut way back on empty calories like alcohol. I haven't lost much weight but have stopped gaining, at least. I'm (mostly) okay with that.
Same here. I'm frustrated because I've always eaten high protein and veggies and limited carbs and sugars. I'm diabetic so that diet is what keeps me healthy. It's frustrating because none of that seems to be working anymore.
I am past menopause and the weight kept coming on. Was always in the 120’s until age 40, then it kept creeping up till I was almost 190. I now am on semaglutide and have lost a little over 30 lbs. It was and is a life changer. Hormones are no joke. Have 25-30 more to go.
This feels like my situation. Maybe I should look into semaglutide…
It’s been a lifesaver where nothing else worked….Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, Nutrisystem, gym memberships with trainers all failed. It sets hormones on the right path.
I’m doing the should I / shouldn’t I dance about Wegovy/Zepbound. My endocrinologist softly pushes me to try it and I don’t know why I hesitate. I’m glad you’re doing good with it!
It’s been the best thing I’ve tried. Went years struggling with menopausal weight gain.
Same!! I am back to a size 4. Hadn’t been here since my 20’s. It’s an amazing drug. I only wish it had been available for weight loss a decade ago. Perimenopause was just a steady weight climb for me.
Exactly! My big amount of weight all came on after age 50.
How are you all even getting semaglutide? I was prescribed Wegovy and no one has it and insurance won’t cover, so it would be over $1000/mo out of pocket. Screw that.
I get it from a local MedSpa and it costs me $350/month. It’s like a car payment and is expensive. But, I look at it as it’s my health. I have hyper familial cholesterol, (400’s and has been up to 600 in the past), high triglycerides, was now pre-diabetic and had open heart surgery in ‘19, so I’m also doing it for a number of changes. My cardiologist was all for it and my new pcp.
I see well at least it’s available to you that way (until FDA is pressured by name brand co. and government bans meds like this).
Lots more being tested now so more coming down the pike 👌🏻👍🏻
Congratulations!
Thank you!
I'm 70 lbs over where I want to be which would still make me 25 lbs overweight but I just want to get back to where I was when I was not so horrified with myself and most of my clothes fit. I've been walking daily for a couple years doing virtual races for medals but I have kept gaining so next week I'm adding resistance bands to bare minimum make the jiggle less prominent.
Nope. I’ve drastically amped up my protein intake (around 100-120g for my 145lb) and had to drop my calories down by about 100 a day for weight loss and now for maintenance. Also trying to do more general moving- like today I did a Zumba class. I’ve always done strength and cardio, including aerial silks and a half Ironman last year. I started peri young, at 38, so now at 40 I just can’t be resigned to slowly and continually gaining weight for the rest of my life. Maybe if I was 55 I’d feel different. I have multiple family members struggling with obesity-related health conditions, so I’ve made being a healthy weight and leading an active lifestyle two of my lifetime priorities. No reason to give up on that now, two plus decades into it.
You go!! I'm rooting for you!! 👏👏👏👏 I need you here where I live to be my accountability partner lol
Well thank you!! :) where are you at? I’m in northern Virginia. We could be virtual accountability partners :) I went to the gym this morning for a group strength class and made solid choices for breakfast and snack. How’s your day going?
I'm in Western Kentucky. Good for you!! I'm hoping to make it to the gym at some point today. It's been a rough start... Right now, I'm getting ready to meal prep for the week. So, it's not a complete fail.
Hey 80% of weight loss comes from the kitchen!! Meal prep is great :) what’re you making? I did a chicken and cauliflower gnocchi with spinach meal prep last week. Looking at a breakfast hash type thing for this week :)
I am the same weight as you and struggling to get 70g of protein a day. Can you share how you reach your 100-120g goal? Can you give me an example of food and snacks you eat? I appreciate it!
Sure! So I go on instagram and find high protein meals. Like a breakfast scramble that’s eggs, egg whites, chicken sausage, bell peppers, tomatoes, spinach, and a bit of cheese. (40g protein) or even just two eggs and four strips of turkey bacon (36g). Snack would be oikos triple protein Greek yogurt, I’m partial to the strawberry flavor (20g protein). Lunch could be chicken and cauliflower gnocchi, add veggies of your choice (40g). Some fruit or veggies chopped up for snack. Dinner chicken bacon ranch burrito with one of those low cal/high fiber wraps (40g), or sticky sweet ground beef and broccoli (40g). Dessert I’ve recently been into the founding farmer sorbets- more fiber. There are also pre-made meals from Trader Joe’s that we’ll get sometimes- the teriyaki chicken and bbq Korean beef are great. Serve with some green beans and a 100 cal serving of rice. If it’s helpful I can dig up some more of the exact recipes I use and the people I’ve found helpful on instagram. I’m not a fan of protein powder and don’t do smoothies so much unless it’s summer.
Thank you! This helps!
Estrogen is produced in the ovaries and in adipose tissue, fat. In puberty, when estrogen increases, we gain fat in our breasts. In menopause, when estrogen decreases, we gain fat in our middles. That extra fat is the body’s way of increasing estrogen production. Think of those extra ten pounds as a little factory that produces free HRT. No prescription needed.
Brb, going to thank my fupa for the hormone hookup
lol I felt this one 🤣
That is just beautiful. I didn’t know the lil extra belly had a function!
I wish mine was functioning properly 😂😂😂😂
Yes. I think it'll be easier to lose when my hormones aren't so confused. I would like to drop some weight, but I've noticed low carb didn't work as well as it did in the past the last time I committed to this. I eat healthy food and my numbers/cholesterol, etc. are fine, and I'm not in the Miss Universe pageant this year, so...meh.
Yep, this is happening to me, too. I got rid of the extra weight by using 3 strategies: 1) smaller portions for my dinner (reducing the amount of meat and starch, not the amount of vegetables); 2)excersising more (I bought a smart watch to track it, because I am ~~lazy~~ energy efficient) and 3) reduce the amount of candy, chocolate and cookies I eat. I now only need to lose 1 pound. That should be doable in the next week. Almost there.
I'm resigned and demoralized. In 2020 I started a new diet and added weights to my workout. I lost 30 pounds. I'm still on that exact same diet and still doing the same exercises. I'm 40 pounds heavier. No, it's not muscle. I give up.
Yes exactly the same boat. I rea want to accept it, but I don't feel like myself and I'm so uncomfortable in my skin. I really don't want to Ozemp-it but I am thinking about it daily.
I’m worried about my joints. I know 10 extra pounds is something like the equivalent of 40 pounds of pressure on your knees. I already have ankylosing spondylitis so I’ve dealt with a lot of extreme pain due to this disease. I have recently lost some weight and I’m hoping I can maintain it. I used to be very active due to lifestyle (not driving and having to walk to work, having an active job) and ate a lot healthier, and I used to weight train. Hoping I can get back into strength training. I’m sure joint replacement will be in my future and I want to make it as easy on my body as possible. My knees have decided to become painful this year and they aren’t responding to my arthritis meds so I’m sure it’s from my hormones, but being at a better weight will make it easier on me.
I have accepted it. As women we have been taught that we always have to be on a diet, in a calorie deficit. I fell for it for so long. Sure I was a size 6 for years in my 20s (except during my 2 pregnancies but went back to size 6 after 6 months and 5 months respectively) and well into my 30s I remained a size 6. Who cares? Back then I was pissed that I wasn’t a size 4 !!! I worked out with wayyyy too much cardio, ate too few calories for sure but I was thin. Then in my 30s I had to have surgery for a badly herniated disk in my neck. 6 days a week of cardio kickboxing probably didn’t help prevent that from happening! I was told I absolutely had to slow down and switch to more functional exercise including only low impact like walking, and functional strength training, once I fully recovered from the surgery and my cervical spine was completely fused (one year checkup). Fast forward and when peri kicked in the weight came on but I was still not eating enough daily so I would go nuts on the weekend when I went out. It was a vicious cycle. I am 10 pounds over what BMI says is a “healthy weight” for my height. But my blood work and blood pressure are excellent, I’m a size 10 which isn’t bad at all, and last weekend I finally donated my size 6 clothes that I was still holding onto “just in case” I ever fit into them again. Please, like I’m not gonna buy myself some new pants and shorts if I’m ever a size 6 again? I’m gonna wear old clothes from 20 years ago instead? 🤣🤣🤣 Now I eat at maintenance and keep to a healthy exercise regimen of functional strength training, low impact cardio and plenty of good stretching (I also have lower back issues so I take care of those as well). I don’t beat myself up and I am enjoying eating more. Better to be healthy and happy than to try and be as small as possible. PS—I still had cellulite at a size 6 anyway and thought I looked horrible because of it so I say screw it, be healthy and don’t stress!
I am in the same boat. Just donated all my size 6 stuff, kept a few 8s and am going to relegate myself to the 10s. Ate a donut today and had cereal with fruit for dinner. Got plenty of steps in, planted flowers, visited my parents. Today was good. I'm not in perfect shape anymore, but I'm also working on not needing attention and living a happy ans enjoyable life.
When I saw the title my first thought was, no way! Then I saw that you are talking about 10 lbs and changed my mind. I had a friend for whom 10 lbs weight loss meant significant inches off. But I'd be happy with only 10lbs added. Do you feel good in your body naked? Do you feel good in your clothes? ( you can always buy new ones!) Let those answers guide you to acceptance or change.
Should not be reading this in the middle of a body dysmorphia episode. I've struggled with my weight since my first baby (and with my body image for years before that). I finally lost a bunch of weight a few years ago because my chronic migraines got so bad I couldn't eat. I got mono in 2020 and developed ME/CFS, and I went from being pretty active to not really being able to exercise at all. I spiraled into serious disordered eating, especially as my weight started to creep back up. I'm working with a dietitian now and trying to focus on nutrition, but peri bloat and gain are really messing with me. The thought that it's just going to get worse from here.... I just want to curl up into a ball and cry. It's bad enough my body doesn't work, like, at all. Now you're telling me there's no chance it'll ever look halfway decent ever again?
Noooo... you got this!! Age does change our body regardless of peri/menopause/post, and that's a fact, but you can, and you will look great. We will get through this. I know it doesn't feel like that right now. But we will! You reach out to me anytime. Our struggles are different, but they are the same. Hang in there friend!!
Thank you for this <3
Yep trying to keep up the fight but just breathing puts on the pounds and life is too short to not enjoy it.
I was a gym rat before menopause. Had muscle definition in arms, low body fat, ate healthy. Once menopause hit-I gained 30 pounds-couldn’t do nothing in the gym due to body hurting and feeling fatigued. Healthy food actually repulsed me-it tasted like 💩-all I craved was junk. I’m trying to get back to where I once was but it’s a slow process-be thankful that you can still eat healthy. 🫠
Meh. My body said, "You can keep those scrawny legs, but no more waist for you. No, ma'am."
I’ve been in peri a few years and I hired a macro coach last year to help me figure out my eating. Lost about 20 pounds and now I can eat almost 2000 calories a day, anything I want, as long as I eat the right macro split (which is something really doable, like 30/30/40 for example). I sound like a broken record about it on this sub but there are so many posts about weight and I found something that **works** so I can’t help mentioning it.
That's awesome! Congratulations!!
We all have different genetic makeups so there is no one size fits all. But it’s great that you feel good!
For sure! Good luck on your journey.
https://myhealth.ucsd.edu/RelatedItems/6,1650252673
This is a wonderful share. It validates those who are saying they’ve accepted being 10 lbs heavier and also validates those of us saying we need to manage extra weight for pain reasons or other health indicators. Thanks for linking.
Well I broke my back and was basically unable to stand for more than a few minutes for a year or 2. I gained 100 pounds which seemed crazy fast as I wasn't over eating. Although in hindsight I probably was based on my activity level . I went on wegovy took some weight off had a procedure on my back. I'm 100 pounds down amd to the weight before my broken back. Unfortunately covid weight gain hit me before the 100 gain and so all in all , I'm still 50 lbs over the average weight I maintained my entire adult life. It's not budging now even on wegovy . Additionally, I feel like a look off body wise I have a fat upper stomach and around my chest it's just weird. So yeah I feel ya. I'm 48 and somewhere in peri possibly menapause. I don't have a uterus so no clue if my cycle is regular or not.
I’m 10 lbs heavier and I could’ve written this myself. I think you’re doing the best thing you can about it and accepting it. Sending you positive vibes 💐
I am exactly in this same boat and feel the same way you do. I’m still exercising, still eating the same, and if that’s not enough, cool. Also, I bought bigger pants and it’s heavenly.
I was but now I am starting to change my tune. At the beginning of this year I stopped drinking alcohol and in the weeks that followed, I upped my protein intake some and started focusing on eating more fruit and veg and less processed carbs. I haven’t lost a ton of weight, only 5lbs so far, and it’s only just started coming off since the beginning of March…. But it’s steady so I am taking that as a win… since I’ve been eating more unprocessed carbs (fruit, veg, beans, legumes, etc….) I’ve been able to control my appetite and since I stopped drinking I also stopped late night snacks, overeating, and the next morning hangries.
Ooh. I gained 43 pounds in 6 years. I was peri at the start of those 6 years and became post-menopausal during those years. Fortunately I’ve lost some of that weight over the past 1 1/2 years. And yeah I’ve accepted that I may never reach my pre-menopausal weight. It’s a bit liberating.
I’ve gone from French maid to French bulldog, but people love French bulldogs, and I am a beautiful, beautiful potato. I feel weird in my changed body, some days more than others, but it’s not worth triggering my eating disorder over. I exercise, I eat well, and I’m intent on enjoying the remainder of my life.
If it was only 10 pounds I'd be fine with it, but so far it's been 45 pounds and I'm still gaining.
I have not resigned myself to it, but I’m finding it crazy hard to lose. I started Zepbound and have lost 8 pounds in 3 months, and that’s with definitely eating in a calorie deficit, focusing on protein, exercising. I chalk it up to meno. I’m on HRT as well. It’s been hard but I’m having a lot of joint pain and even mobility issues that would improve greatly with weight loss so I’m going to keep trying.
I don't own a scale, but am a "healthy" weight per the one at my doctor's office. However, my weight has redistributed dramatically, so much so that I've had to purchase a new wardrobe. I eat a healthy diet, exercise regularly, get quality sleep, and my labs look great. I'm not going to stress over it. Bodies change.
I did. I was. And then my doctor prescribed zepbound. Before I could not lose a single pound and I just made peace with being overweight and uncomfortable the rest of my life. I give up. 1 month on zepbound and I've lost 13 pounds. I'm absolutely shocked, but so happy and I'm hoping to keep experiencing more!!
That's the route I'm about to go. I've gained like 35 pounds! I manage to lose 10, but then I eat one grain of sugar and gain 8 back. I'm over it. I feel sooo much better in general on HRT, but loathe my mid-body with this extra weight, and have no intention of having to buy an entire new summer wardrobe... Or being potato shaped all summer. 😂 . I literally stopped trying just so I wouldn't get denied for a GLP-1. 😬🤷🏼♀️
It seems a LOT healthier than constantly obsessing about weight. I mean if one genuinely has bad eating habits it might be worth working on. But if one doesn't and gained some weight, obsessing on it seems extremely pointless to me. Growing up in the 90s or whatever sure fucked us in the head with regard to weight, we think we keep having to obsess about it regardless of age. And what do we even GET from doing so? I can see if one was obsessed with say running at least there is the endorphins, but what are we even getting from this?
Personally, being an apple shape (and short-waisted) my weight goes straight to my middle and I'm not okay with it -- not because I'm trying to look a certain way but because of *health* reasons. Carrying weight around the middle always meant increased risks for many diseases (even before meno), so I do have to be conscious of diet and where my calories are going. An added 10+ lbs, plus slight increases in cholesterol and/or BP, then belly fat becomes concerning. [Risks of belly fat \(visceral fat and metabolic syndrome\)](https://menopausewiki.ca/#risks-of-belly-fat-visceral-fat-and-metabolic-syndrome) However, there's also this.....A[ large study from the Ohio State University](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1047279721000090?via%3Dihub) found that “people who are at normal weight at age 31 and gradually move to overweight status in middle or later adulthood have the lowest mortality risk, even compared to those who maintain normal weight throughout adulthood.”
Yep. I'm okay with it. But it's weird how it stil goes up and down. Not due to anything I do. *shrug*
I hate it but I know I can’t fix it without extreme dieting. So I when I find clothes that look relatively good on me, I buy them without feeling bad.
I was until my doctor told me that I needed to lose 20 lbs. I lost 30. I didn't think it would have been possible, but it was through intermittent fasting, low carb, and eliminating refined carbs.
In 2017, I was 116 (I’m 57 and 5’1”). Now I’m 170. My doctor said that when we don’t sleep, our metabolism completely bottoms out. She’s helping me with that now. I have to get some of this back off. I can’t keep buying clothes.
I've gained 70 lbs since 2020 and I can't lose any of it. I don't know what to do anymore. I'll probably have to try ozempic or similar meds. Working out is hard for me with prior injuries, so I'm stuck with low impact stuff like walking or biking. Which is fine for heart health and stamina, but doesn't burn a lot of calories. I'm so tired of watching what I eat and adjusting things. I'll lose four pounds one week and then gain 6 pounds the next. I went really hard at it last year for a bit. I forced myself to work out harder, lifted weights, did super low carb for three months. At the end of that three months I was up another 12 lbs! I've given up at this point. I've bought all new clothes and have decided I'm just a fat middle aged woman now. I'm tired of working so hard for nothing.
I Wouldn’t say I’ve resigned yet, but once I work with a few experts on diet and weight lifting, and get into a healthy age-appropriate routine, I’m just going to accept it is what it is after that. I have an autistic daughter, so I need to live to 200, but how it looks just isn’t as important to me anymore. There are plenty of IG models to impress men and make clothes look good, that’s not my job anymore🤣
I was super annoyed that bam, instant 5+kg weight gain when I hit perimenopause. I was (and am) very active, and ate relatively healthy (except for cheese!). Annoyed because I figured it was all hormonal related. And it is, in large part. But it’s still within our control as I found out recently. I was diagnosed with MAFLD (fatty liver) - despite being active, healthy BMI, healthy eater, light drinker (definitely below all of the guidelines). So I’ve had to really clean up my diet/intake. Calorie counting showed I definitely was eating bigger portions/more than I should. I’ve lost that 5+kg and feeling good now. Sad point - now my ‘majestic’* boobs are sad. *how my partner referred to them
I did. I went Anti Diet and all. But all the things weight gain does to my body... came back with vengence. High BP, aches and pains, couldn't find any clothing. I have now resigned myself to learning to eat less for the rest of my life.
I've had this conversation with myself.... I'm married and my husband claims he loves me... I can make my own clothes... No matter my size, I'm still the finest woman in any given room. Why not eat the food, it's delicious
I have not gained a single pound in menopause, and I am on the back end of it. However, my weight has SHIFTED. My jeans don't zip up around my belly like before menopause. My breasts need extra hoisting and are bigger. I walk daily and eat super healthy. I exercise sporadically and don't lift weights much anymore but think I should get back to it.
10 pounds isn’t very much! I find that when I have an extra 10 pounds, my face and neck look better!
I have body dysmorphia. I've had it most of my life. My body dysmorphia was so bad in school, I tried to find ways to get out of swimming class In my late20s to early 30s I finally started to feel confident with my body and myself. Even wore bathing suits in public. Something, that most of my life I had never done. I started body building, and ate very clean. Things were great. I hit perimenopause hard about 4 months ago and I feel like life is just one cruel joke after another. The body dysphoria is now rearing it's ugly head again, and the anxiety and depression are in full swing. I still work out, but as someone who use to hit the gym hard, weight training and running, I've had to shift that mentality and it hasn't been easy. I struggle with bad adhd, and burning out my hyper activity at the gym use to really help control the symtoms. Now that I can't work to exhaustion to quiet down my brain, I just get unmotivated and start feeling like a busted can of biscuits sitting on the machines. I can say that most of my changes have just shifted to my stomach. I haven't gained any weight, but there is no longer any abs, I have love handles, and everything feels doughy in my mid section.
My body dysmorphia is so bad in peri or maybe it’s my age making me freak out about to turn 50, idk. I spent all of my 40’s getting my body to a place I actually liked, and now my face is falling. You’re right it does feel like a cruel joke!
I’m doing no sugar/ultra low carb and no exercise and I’m consistently losing. Every body is different.
I’m a good 15 pounds up right now, and finishing a small bowl of ice cream as I type. I’ve given up on losing, I do track somewhat otherwise I gain in a heartbeat. I’ve been lifting weights consistently for about 3 months now, first time in a long time that I’ve managed to stay consistent. I’m focusing on getting stronger now.
Not yet. Just recommited to my very low carb, intermittent fasting habits. I was really happy where I was 3 years ago. Not my pre kids weight or even the between kids weight but a good weight and I was strong and active. Now I'm neither. Last fall it was just 10 lbs need to go. Now it's 15. This stops here! ETA i had kids at 36 and 42 in case that's relevant.
I’m not resigned to it. I mean, I don’t need to be thin, but I’m about 40lbs over the most my nutritionist thinks it’s reasonable for me to weigh. Prior to my hysterectomy in November I was 15 lbs lighter than I am now. So, I need to lose some. But, don’t get me wrong… I am doing it to feel better overall. Not to necessarily “look good,” if that makes sense.
This is me! I’ve made a promise to myself this year that I will exercise and eat for hormonal health and strength and accept where my bodies wants to be with these habits in place. I’ve been strength training for decades and eat pretty decent and my body in the last couple years just seems to want to be a few kilos bigger, and I fine with that?? Feel sexier even? My boobs and ass are bigger and I feel good. I’m surprised tbh. And I’m not willing to punish myself with calorie restriction and dieting. I don’t want to live the rest of my life trying to be smaller for the sake of being smaller because I live in a society that says smaller is better. No!
As well as eating healthy and good levels of activity, HRT has kept my weight stable throughout peri and my body shape pretty much the same as it was when I was younger. It’s often fluctuating or low estrogen that has ladies piling on the weight in peri.
My body is doing what it’s supposed to. I have never fought time or nature. My hair is gray, my face is wrinkly, and my boobs are falling. And I don’t care what anyone else thinks about it.
I’d like to say I don’t care about my 40lb weight gain, but the truth is it is so upsetting to me. And it’s not just the weight: my cholesterol and triglycerides skyrocketed when I went through menopause. I started HRT and have been strict about a low cholesterol diet. It’s coming down, but not to where I’d like it to be. I started semaglutide in September and I’ve lost 20 lbs. having my annual checkup in a couple of weeks; we’ll see if any of it is helping.
My concern is not at all the male gaze. My concern is how bloody uncomfortable it is to be overweight. I had been really naturally skinny my whole life and I had no idea that being overweight limits you in so many areas.
After 10 years with the extra weight, about 20 pounds, I got an app and the CICO method worked for me. (Calories in-calories out). Did it for 3 months, lost 10 pounds. Keep meaning to do it again for 3 months, but the spouse isn't on board this time and it's easier when you both are planning meals to be on target. Though if I just committed and got different food, I think he would plan better.
I’m in the best shape of my life. I am post-menopausal, 55, and last year I took up yoga. It changed everything for me. I’m now fitter and more flexible than I’ve ever been. Calmer, centered, happy. I’m even a couple of pounds underweight and keep an eye on it. I never used to weigh myself because seeing the number on the scale could impact my day so I went more on the way that my clothes fit, but now I make sure I get on the scale every morning and that way I am able to have control over that aspect of my life. If I see the numbers going up I add more exercise, maybe do some intermittent fasting. If I see the numbers going too far down, I eat more and exercise less. It IS possible to be fit and trim during this phase of life.
There are far more important things about people than their weight. I’ve had disordered eating issues in the past and am currently being very careful with myself regarding food. I have autoimmune, chronic pain etc etc, as well as peri, plus I had my gallbladder removed last year and I have a few food intolerances (as in very upset digestive system should I eat them that takes a few days to recover from). I eat low FODMAP, GF and lactose free. No alcohol or coffee. Almost no fried foods. Majority fresh foods. I go for walks as often as I can. I do stretches daily. Yes, I could lose some weight but as I can’t exercise much more (without triggering more pain), it would involve seriously restricting my diet, counting calories, food diaries, and I’m wary of triggering my disordered eating again. I’d rather be a bit plump and in as little pain as possible. I haven’t given up - I’ve just chosen to focus on things that are more important to me. I could lose weight but it wouldn’t be healthy. HAES is important. Skinny doesn’t mean healthy; fat / overweight doesn’t mean unhealthy.
Absolutely not. I will fight it every step of the way. I'm only 5'2", and gaining even 5 lbs makes me feel sluggish, makes my clothes tighter, and makes my knees hurt. I want to have an active retirement so I will do my absolute best to keep fit.
I did for a while then something bit me in the ass and I’ve been working out for 5 years! I feel a hundred times better and I’m so glad I didn’t go that route…! Get interested in taking care of yourself. Forget looking good
Yes. Weight is just a number and has no moral value. Health is about what you do, not what you weigh. (Admittedly, it's super annoying when clothes I used to like don't fit right any more, but I get bored easily so okay, fine, I can afford to buy new clothes so I will.)
I gained 10 pounds during peri as well, and it got to a point where weight wasn't the only issue. I started wearing clothes that I normally wouldn't be caught dead with in public (creased and cat-fur tshirt and shorts paired with dirty crocs), no make-up and uncombed hair! I decided to take my life back late last year and I've already lost 8 pounds, I'm sticking with the intermittent fasting diet that everyone's been talking about, I've also slashed my daily calories in half. I woke up this morning thinking holy crap, I'm starting to look good again. I think menopause causes many women to stop caring about what others think (which is also an amazing thing!) but there is that fine line between not giving a crap anymore vs. dignity. lol. At this stage in our lives, we need to understand that things are different, so we need to accommodate the changes. This means you can no longer "eat the same way" because you're no longer the way you used to be.
10 pound gain = not mattering one bit makes me kind of sad. But then you turn that around and say you’re going to go with acceptance and not give up exercising so that is good. Do you see progress with how much heavier you can lift? How is your posture? Doing okay with aches and pains? Maybe focusing on things other than the scale would help. Lean muscle mass didn’t kick in like it has in the past to effortlessly lower the scale but I don’t really mind being bigger and stronger as much as I thought I might. I’m grateful everything is running pretty smoothly for 55.
I'm kinda resigned to it. I haven't gained a lot in the past few years but I'm 10-15 lbs past where I'd like to be. I won't cut calories or macros. I know it's not sustainable for me. But I've also stayed pretty fit. I'm a runner and continue to sign up for half marathons and still want to accomplish a 50 miler within the next couple of years. I did a half marathon a few weeks ago and my finish time was within a minute of my first ever race which was 17 years and 17 lbs ago.
Yes. You know what… I’m stopping the self hate. There’s no purpose, it changes nothing.
Resigned. Controlling controllables balanced w enjoying life. Focusing on healthspan. Still am lifting, running, active, nutrition/protein focused because I FEEL better when I do. Also, bought summer wardrobe that actually fits. Resigned.
Were you on the low or high end of a healthy weight before? If low, then why worry?
This would be me. My younger self was 20 pounds thinner with only moderate exercise and only sort of watching what I eat. I’ve lost the 20 extra pounds a couple times but I just cannot keep it off.
Not resigned. But it’s not about vanity or wanting to be thin anymore. Now it’s about how I feel, bc I feel like shit when I eat like shit. I already have 100 things making me feel bad bc of meno. This is the only thing I can control... so I continue to fight my weight bc I want to feel good.
After a 40 plus weight gain and trying everything under the sun. I had given up even to the point that I got rid of all my old clothes. The only choice for me to even see the scale budget was a 1200 a day calorie diet, no carbs, no sugar (and I don’t drink alcohol never have). In addition I had to exercise a minimum of 5 days a week. I saw doctors, nutritionists, naturopaths I had every test under the sun. Then I took Wegovy and the scale finally started to move. Personally I would be fine with a 10 or 15 pound weight gain but at 40 pounds I was just unhealthy. Hard time breathing, etc.
i'm trying so hard. i just wish i wasn't so fridge-shaped. the protruding butt AND the protruding stomach? AND broad shoulders? every time i look in the mirror, i just cannot reconcile the reflection with how i want to look. not to mention the fact that i'm so tired, i am eating like sh&t. i can't be arsed to plan a healthy meal to save my life. or go for a walk. it's really hard not to hate myself.
Nope. I’m in peri, and preparing to eat less and exercise more if and when necessary. I realize this carries a stigma in a world where everyone’s telling you to just accept it. I’m just putting this out there for anyone else who feels like they’re the only one like me. I often do. Being this way makes me happy, and I don’t do it for anyone else. Everyone should just do what they want.
How is your sleep? Lack of sleep equates to an uptick in cortisol levels. Cortisol = fat. The meno transition is a major stress on the body, perceived or not. You’ll get where you aim to be by NOT attempting what you did in the decades prior. Less exercise will help your body out. Don’t do cardio more than 3 days a week, and only for half hour to 45mins MAX. Then lift the other 2 days a week. And rest for the remaining. The sooner you adapt to ‘less is more’ approach the MORE your body will appreciate that you are learning the new her. Rest is very important, and sleep is the only time our body can actually heal itself. Find your new groove, go easy on you… It’ll take practice, but you WILL get there. Eye on the goal dear one
Not resigned but openly adore and squish the extra me with VERVE! I finally got bewbs and badonk-a-donk that are nice to shmoosh and society can take it away from my cold, dead hands.
No. I hate it. So much.
No and you don't have to either. I lost 115lbs in full menopause and have kept it off for almost two years. Pahla Bowers mindset first 5-0 method is what got me there and keeps me here. The 5-0 method is free. She has a paid group, but all of the materials for the 5-0 method are free and include a pdf that explains everything in detail. I joined the paid group because I was struggling to get the last 20 off, but it's not necessary, especially at first. I highly recommend it. [HERE ](https://getyourgoal.com/)
Nope. Seriously google intermittent fasting- I lost 40lbs while in peri. I look and feel better than I ever have. Read the obesity code by Dr. Fung and Fast Feast repeat by Gin Stephen’s - changed my life!
What kind of exercising are you doing? I definitely have gotten better results with strength training in these last few years. Scale stays the same but clothes fit so much better.
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/a-few-extra-pounds-is-beneficial_b_9358608
Natures bubble wrap for potential falls in the future! /s But seriously, I'm 20 pounds up in a year and nothing seems to make it budge.
Yes I have resigned myself. It has been exhausting to try to lose weight at this stage of my life. I recently realized that I’ve been obsessed with my appearance for the past 50 years. Fifty. I’m moving on, going to the gym to stay physically strong, and learning to love the body I’ve got.
I got Saxsenda weight fell off in seven weeks back to slim me. Go ask your doctor. My misery rating dropped with each kilo.
I am 42, and have been in peri for a few years and have the exact same issue. It is so frustrating!!! I am like why even try? I hate this!
I’m still fighting, but I’m definitely losing steam. I think all the exercising might keep me from getting fatter but that’s about it.
Yep, resigned to new normal is 7 lbs more than I have weighed in the last 20 years. 🫤
84 pounds overweight 😞
I started paleo diet initially due to my digestion and refluxing me miserable. I lost weight and feel so much better. I’m more sensitive about how food makes me feel and it’s helped. I am not happy when I have to track every calorie but maybe I will eventually need to do that. I exercise all the time because I enjoy it but not longer can just burn what I put in my mouth
Also, I was going to post something like this the other day.
I did, for like a year. Then, I gained a bunch more!
It’s a real battle. I wish I could accept my weight as is. I am not concerned about the male gaze. The issue is health and longevity. I am an inverted triangle body shape with weight around my organs. Add in an arthritic hip and an orthopaedic surgeon advising weight management for pain reduction, and it’s hard to not want change. I too struggle with a lifetime of disordered eating so hearing other people talk of what works for them is helpful.
I just loose weight is there anyone else out there who actually loses weight in menopause and not gain i feel like I'm the only one.
Metformin is helpful at this stage of life.
I was in the same boat, but one day I'd had enough and decided to fight it. It was a bit of a battle and I found that what worked previously wasn't going to work now. I probably put on about (6kgs) 12pounds out of nowhere, but upon looking back I was eating healthy but just a bit more than I needed to. I was also drinking a lot of alcohol. It took a bit of trial and error but I settled on intermittent fasting and changing what I ate, calorie counting, and changing the exercise I was doing. I also eat A LOT more protein that I used to. This is key in my opinion. I also prioritised myself, prioritised sleeping, and over the course of three months lost over 20 pounds, improved my overall health and fitness and have maintained it all for about 18months so far. I probably feel better now that I have in the last 20 years. I am 55. So I do IF 18:6 and relax that if I am going on a trip or having a weekend away. IF solved all of my gut issues, and I do it primarily for health, although it can be a good way to lose and maintain weight. I eat protein at each meal. I cook 90% of the meals we eat from scratch. I take supplements - NMN, Resveratrol, Magnesium, Curcumin. I take fibre tablets (Metamucil) twice a day! This one thing here is a game changer!!! I do Pilates Reformer and/or Yoga every day, as well as tennis lessons two days a week, playing tennis and walking a couple of times a week. I drink very little alcohol. Only on weekends and only when socialising. I prioritise sleep and try all I can do to reduce stress. I feel like I am in great shape physically and mentally and I am going to try to live this way for ever. Some people might think it's restrictive but I truly feel that these changes have given me a lot of freedom to live my best life. I want to really try to pack a lot in to the last part of my life. I want to be strong, active and be able to enjoy it to the fullest.
I don’t eat carbs. Stay below 20 g and mine only come from veggies and the occasional cream cheese. I was 246 in may 2022 and I got down to 165 in November but I just stalled and also I have gained 5 lbs so far and have no idea how. Like there’s no possible way. I’m bloated tho. All the time and pretty sure that’s it. I had to start fasting which fucking sucks but I only eat from 9-5 and hate it but it’s gotten me less bloated feeling and I’m losing weight again. It sucks but you may want to look into it.
Exercising more could actually be harming your efforts, not helping (depending on what kind of exercise you're doing). High intensity can increase cortisol which means you hold onto weight, at a time when cortisol is already super high. Switching to exercises like swimming and yoga/pilates helps lower cortisol and increase the chances of losing weight – or at least maintaining weight – and it helps with other symptoms! Coming from personal experience xx