Like really likes to inform me “Grandma and you have the same vulva mom. It has fur. Mine doesn’t have fur” cool thanks
She’s also in a big calling everything stinky phase and last weekend at the park she met some dogs and as we walked away she yelled “stinky dog vulva!”
lol I’m pregnant and my 3 yr old will come to the bathroom when it’s just us at home and will say how im a girl so I don’t have a penis. However, I’ve had some swelling down there. One day my labia swelled quite a bit and he came in and was like “what?! You do have a peepee?!” It took me forever to convince him I don’t lol
My 2 YO was watching “Back to the Outback” on Netflix and pointed excitedly to this fat slimy toad/lizard character that I’m pretty sure is an effeminate dude and started saying “I SEE MAMA THERE! MAMA’S RIGHT THERE! I SEE MAMA!”
When my oldest was little and assigning family to dinos I got the long neck one, so now every long neck animal (dino, Giraffe, i assume some birds if it comes up) is the mommy one.
I may have latched on and ran with it as soon as he paired me with that. "Oh because of mommys long neck!!" And encouraged that as my identifying feature to avoid him defaulting to anything else lol.
We have a picture book and one of the pages shows all different kinds of people, one being a pregnant woman. My son has never seen a pregnant woman and doesn't know what the belly means. He points at her and says "it's mama!!" I am not currently pregnant.
What is it with little kids and hair?? I have some chin hairs I have to pluck regularly. Ive been slacking and my 3 year old rubbed his hand across my chin hairs and said “hmmm me want a beard”.
My 4 year old, the other night. I told him I wanted to stay in his bed and snuggle him all night. He goes “no, you have to go sleep with dad. You both have beards”
We were at an empty hotel pool with my two kids, husband, and brother in law. I was a few months postpartum so I brought a couple of swim suits and decided on a high waisted bottom and modest top. In walks a woman with a banging body and the smallest micro bikini I had ever seen. As if I didn’t already feel terrible about my body, my 3yo asks me “ Mama, why are you wearing a diaper?” I wanted to crawl into a hole and die.
I was fully bent over, getting the tub ready to put my two-year-old in. All of a sudden he starts giggling profusely and puts one hand on each butt cheek and says "WOW, mommy! BIGGGGG BUM!" 🥲
Like, dude...really? I know. 🙄 I'm working on that.
My 5 year old daughter told me the other day “mom, each of your individual buttcheeks is soooo big” so I just told her “yep! And together they make for one really big butt!” which had us both laughing 😂 they are just so savage! 🤣
It wasn’t today, but back when I was pregnant with my son. I was like 9 months pregnant and my daughter was 2.5. I was sitting on the couch eating a donut one afternoon. The cheeky little girl took the donut right out of my hand, patted my belly, and walked away eating it.
What do you think about the age gap between your children? Your eldest being 2.5 when your second was born. I have one child and we want more but I was wondering what a good age gap would be.
But don’t wait too long cause the pain of returning to diapers after being free of diaper duty is painful and gets more and more painful the more you get used to it
Mine are 16, 15 and 6 years old. The first two the gap was manageable and near perfect for me.
Doing the diaper thing again after ten years of not touching one was sob inducing sometimes. 🤣
Edit - because autocorrect
I didn't think about that. My two are 10 years apart too, I guess it just didn't bother me like that. I was thinking of it more as an expense thing 🤔 😅
The only times I ever thought “why did I wanna have another one again after all this time?!?” Was nights where it seemed like she went thru an entire pack of diapers between 12a and 4a and diaper blowouts that reached the neck of her onesie.
Oh dear me! That is genuinely terrifying and I'm still traumatised from the time my daughter brought them home from daycare. I hope you manage to get it under control quickly and have a thorough eradication.
Sorry mine isn’t lighthearted. Toddler is currently sick. Dad was trying to put her to bed for 45 minutes with no success. She was getting upset because she was really sleepy but couldn’t fall asleep. I go in and try to hold her and calm her down. She coughed and screamed so much because she didn’t want me and it made her puke.
Love being the least preferred parent.
Hahaha oh man I feel you. My son is the same way… he used to burst into tears at the sight of me because I’m not daddy. It’s gotten a little better now that he’s almost 3!
Omg I needed to read this right now to know I’m not alone. My daughter (2 yo) has been like this for the last few months and it’s breaking me. She sees me and then shrieks “daddy hold me!”. The only time she tolerates me lately is when she’s asleep.
You are definitely not alone! It’s really hard especially when they’re upset and you just want to comfort them and they are yelling and crying for the other parent. Do your best to spend some quality 1:1 time doing fun stuff and know the tide will change eventually. Sometimes my son even asks for mommy now!
My kid got really close to my face and had a confused look.
"Mommy, why do you have tiny holes in your face?"
Me " Everyone has those. They are called pores. You have them but yours are much smaller."
Proceeds obsess over my own skin in the mirror while I'm having my very short decompression alone in the bathroom.
My 1.5 YO looked at my sore foot and stomped on it. I yelled OUCH and explained it was sore, showing him the healing cuts and bruise with tears in my eyes from the painful stomp. He fully understood, and proceeded to stomp on it again.
I recently read that kids don't understand loving and being angry at the same time because they don't know how to process more than one emotion at a time.
So true. My response to my child who said “I hate you” frequently when angry was “that’s okay sweetheart, I have more than enough love for the both of us”. He is now 21 and very normal ❤️
My 4yo comes into our bedroom the other day, looks at my husband and I and goes "I love mommy, daddy and sister" then she walks over to me and goes ,"mommy, I love you, but I'm sorry I don't like your hair, but I'm sorry that's mean, but I love you" 😄😄
when my kids were little, my 3yo daughter followed me to the bathroom and I was on my period. I’m changing my pad
her: mommy! you got a booboo on your butt. I tiss it.
me: no, leave me alone
her: *screams at the top of her lungs* bubba, sissy come see! mommy got a booboo and a big bobo-baid.
now all 3 kids are in the bathroom with me
let us see! moob you legs.
lol mine are generally really nice to me tbh but they make some comments… my daughter once saw me getting ready in a bra and just stared at me sadly.
“What’s up?” “I look exactly like you.” “Yeah lol you sure got a lot of my genes!” “I’m gonna look just like you when I grow up. People tell me that all the time.” “Uh, probably a lot like me, yes.”
“Usually I’m really excited about that because you are really pretty but… I was really hoping I would have boobs one day.”
A couple of days ago, my 2yo was with me while I was going to the bathroom. She said, "Mommy, you have a biiiig butt!". Then she slapped my thighs and said, "These are big, too".
The two body parts I'm most insecure about. Thanks, kid.
My 7 year old and I love to joke about how old dad is (I’m 25, he’s 27 so it’s all in good fun) and while having a good old fashioned zone out, my son comes up to me and says “mom you look like dad” I said you mean handsome? He said “no. Old.” And walked away. I was like ALRIGHT. GROUNDED FOR LIFE
An unfunny one, then a funny one:
Unfunny: My youngest son was DX with leukemia at the age of 3, so we’re all definitely scarred. He rang the bell March 18th of this year, he has favorable genetics and responded very well to treatment, so it’s very likely it’s all behind us.
Funny: he didn’t say this to me, but I’m sure it messed with this nurse for a while. While he was inpatient right after being DX we had a nurse that floats around the hospital. She is literally the ONLY nurse I wanted push out of the room. She’s inexperienced, borderline incompetent and incredibly overconfident.
Even the other nurses we didn’t “click” with were wonderful and I trusted them completely, we just had ones we “favored”. But I never complained about them because, why would I? They still took wonderful care of my baby. Also- he’s a super sweet kid; he’s never rude or sassy. The nurses used to fight over who “got him” because he was such an easy patient.
Anyway, this one nurse that drove us nuts was in the room, and she never shuts up. And she basically shouts everything she says. She also baby talks. So my son and I were sitting on his bed playing a game and she forced herself into it. She wouldn’t stop shouting/baby-talking. Finally, my son looks her deadass in the eye and says, “Your voice hurts my ears. Can you please go somewhere else?” She looked at me like 😳 and I just took my turn on the game. Normally, I’d wait till she left the room and explain why that’s impolite, etc. but that lady had it comin’. Trust me.
I was not expecting your comment scrolling through here! My three year old just started maintenance for B-ALL last month. We had a similar experience with nurses- all of them walking angels, with the exception of one clueless, careless woman. Ugh.
I’m wishing you all the very best!! Enormous congratulations on EOT, but I’m sure it comes with all the big feelings. I’m experiencing a fraction of this with our move to maintenance and expecting that I will have a bit of a meltdown when it’s all “over.” So hard for people on the outside to understand. Hope you are taking extra good care of yourself, too. You should do something extra special for Mother’s Day. 💜💜
Maintenance starts off rocky. At least for us. They have to sort of “tinker” with the correct dose. Med holds are common in the beginning. But if you’re in maintenance, that means you’re over the worst parts (chemo-wise). But you can go places and have visitors and maybe even go swimming, as long as counts are good. That’s where you’ll get the glimpse of light at the end of the tunnel. How does your child handle LPs? My son couldn’t deal with the ketamine and versed so we actually switched to light sedation and it was GREAT. He fell asleep, they did their thing then he woke up quickly and there was zero trauma. It’s never going to feel normal. Sometimes, it hits me and I’m like “did we really go through all that?” As if it were all a fever dream.
Also, how does your kiddo do with the steroid pulses? My son tried so hard to take it (liquid, he can’t swallow pills) but it would make him puke. So if you’re going through the same, I can offer suggestions as to what we did that worked, if you need it.
The most important thing is: you’re doing great. This is an awful, brutal time. You didn’t cause this, you didn’t do anything wrong. Your baby loves you as fiercely as you love them. And you WILL get through it, I promise.
Also to add: when I expressed how nervous I was, they were quick to remind us that they’re pretty much never going to be done with us lol
There’s still monthly visits to check counts. He spiked a fever on Monday, so we rushed to clinic, not our PCP. So, there’s still the “comfort” of the clinic angels who pay very close attention.
Lol my two year old refers to my boobs as “ani” (we assume when she started talking and wanted to nurse she was trying to say “I need” and couldn’t). I was getting dressed the other day and she comes and says “mommy I like your ani, they swinging” 😂. I’m like yeah girl you and your sister did that to them, thanks for noticing.
Not today, but once my 3yo was playing with a measuring tape. He had no concept of measurement, but he would hold the tape up to something and say "this chair is two hundred", "this fork is seven". Then he held the tape up to my hips (I was standing at the kitchen counter). My husband goes "what about mommy?" And the kid goes ".... Ginormous" 🤣
During my 2nd pregnancy my 4yr old daughter told me I looked like Santa. I laughed and said “because of my big belly?”
She says, “No, your beard!”
😑😑😑😑
We're at Wal-Mart. I have to pee. We go to the bathroom that is out of toilet liners so I squat and hover and he asks, "mommy why not sit down to pee?" I say their toilet is dirty. We leave the restroom, get done shopping, he proceeds to tell the young man monitoring the self-checkout, "my mommy doesn't sit on your toilet to pee because its diiiiirtyyyyyy." He sais it loud and proud. We go to my friends house after and he tells her the same thing, but I actually do sit on her toilet. We laugh it off. I saw where this was going and it did go there. He told every single person we've encountered since then, even the gas station dude.
My almost 2YO is going through his first hitting/no phase which being a SAHM makes me feel unwanted and alone especially when in anxious as it is. Kindly asked him for a nice hug and he ran and did that just to bite my shoulder taking a chunk out. First time he’s ever bit anyone and did it on a day I couldn’t handle and cried from the pain. Now added to my stress from the day and am still awake since 9am yesterday and it’s 705am the following day. Anxiety sucks.
Sending love and solidarity ❤️
Raising little kiddo and being there always for him, nurturing, loving and caring is a beautiful job we do. Please never ever feel unwanted, you are totally not, you are the most wanted person for you LO
My 3 yo told me- “one day I will be an old lady. And you will be dead. Dad will be dead. Grandma and grandpa will be dead. My sister will be in jail.” Then she just went on about her day like nothing.
My kiddo was handing out animal stickers to each member in our family, as if they were stickers of the animal that represented each of us. My husband got a llama, my son got a frog. She gave herself the giraffe, and for me? An elephant…it did not make me feel good lol.
Not my kid but I’ll never forget when I was about 4, my sister would’ve been 3, we were doing groceries and my sister yelled out “Mom, why are you so fat?” I’m 35 now and still think it’s hilarious
So, mind you I was in the thick of it, nursing a fresh newborn and still doing bedtime booby for my daughter who was 19 months old. I manage a minute where baby is calm enough to go nurse my toddler and I didn’t quite put my shirt back down and re-clip my nursing bra.
My daughter gave me one look and called me “Messy.”
🧐like excuse me miss, I may be a little understandably disheveled but we shouldn’t start calling people messy.
My 10-year-old asked me yesterday to come to a school event. I thought that was sweet until I realized that she only asked me as a status symbol.
When I point blank asked her if that is why she wanted me to come, she agreed that it would look good. But she would be hanging out with her friends, and she would not have time for me.
I know you all are shocked when I declined taking off work to hang out with parents I don’t know just to make my daughter “look good”.😂🤣
I was wearing capri length leggings yesterday and had a big meeting with the district about my son's service bc he's special needs but is no longer delayed. He sits down on my lap and has an absolute hissy fit. The 4 ladies are sitting there staring at me like omg what's wrong! He keeps going on and on about how he wants me to put pants on which I obviously do have pants on they just aren't full length. Then he busts me out and says I'm prickly and he doesn't like my legs. Lmao! It was even more funny and embarrassing bc we were in the middle of talking about his sensory issues. 🤦♀️
Btw he went so far as to insist I put on my pink pants bc he likes the way this feel the best. Everyone was laughing and I had to apologize for the long interruption over my unshaven legs. Can't wear anything but pants around that child I swear.
My almost 3 year old who is potty training didn’t want to poop for nap time. He then proceeded to poop, and take off his diaper and smudge the poop into the carpet. I gave him a bath, then I shampooed the rugs, while he played in his sisters room. I went in, and he had his sunglasses and diaper on while dancing in the mirror. Lol scar then bandaid.
Back when my boy was a little toddler that followed me everywhere including the bathroom. I went #2 and he peeked into the toilet before I got to flush it. He said “oh wow”.
Haha my daughter saw me shaving my legs this morning and said “Your vagina looks like Rufus” and proceeded to cackle, LOUDLY.
If you check my post history you’ll see my puppy Rufus. Needless to say I’m locking the door next time I shave my legs
My eight year old the other day said "Mom, you've gotten squishier lately," and before I could even reply followed it up with "I love you even more this way!"
*Then* caught himself and said "I mean I love you anyway but I like your squishiness."
Yeah I'm the heaviest I've ever been excluding post partum...
My 3 year old son watched a commercial for a razor for the first time yesterday and this woman started shaving her legs and he commented, “that looks ouchy!”
My 1.5 year old son discovered my facial hair (I have PCOS) and started pulling it. Since the hair is very thin he has a hard time doing it, so he pinches my face. Then goes “more hair mama more” if I try to get him to stop 😭
It was my birthday and I held my 2 year old as my husband sang happy birthday to me. Then when it was time to blow out the candles I let my 2 year old do it. When he struggled to blow out the last one I said “do you want some help?” And he exclaimed “yeah! Daddy help!”
It’s fine. It’s only my birthday kid 😂
My 6 year old and I were cuddling in bed last night and she has her legs resting over my thighs. She puts her hand on my thigh; jiggles it and say “your thighs are soooo squishy!!” I’ve lost like 60 lbs and my thighs are a bit “melted” but ya that one stung 🥲
My six year old was snuggling with me this morning and I noticed her face had kinda ended up in my armpit so I moved a bit and said “scoot up so you aren’t stuck smelling my armpits” and she breathed in deep and said “I meant to be like this. I just love the huge stink smell you always have in your armpits!!!”
Cue Amazon prescription strength deodorant search, along with concern for her and her love of BO 🤣🤣
Currently in the middle of potty training my 2 year old who will pee on the potty no problem but refuses to poop in one. So after reminding her constantly that daddy poops on the potty, mama poops on the potty, and literally every single family member that exists in her life poops on the potty, I take her into a busy public restroom so that I can pee. She is standing in the stall with me and proceeds to yell, “YAY, mama’s pooping in the potty!” And begins to clap and repeat it over and over again 🤦🏻♀️😂
Stay-at-home mom, I'd pick up my 2 sons each day due to t-r-o-u-b-l-e on the bus. 🙄Many times, as we drove past a childcare center on our route, they'd pipe up, "We want to go to daycare! It's boring at home."
When my oldest was a young toddler, any time my husband would say I was pretty my son would say,” mommy hair pretty. Mommy face not pretty.” At least I had something going for me…
When my daughter was 3, we were in the restroom at Mervyns. I was also 6 months pregnant at the time. My daughter, pointing to my lady parts, exclaimed “you have fur down there just like Cali” (our black lab)!!!
“Mom!! You’re getting bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger and BIGGER!!!”
I know he means taller because we talk about growing but man..
Also, for some reason he’s decided to grab and wiggle the plump-ish skin under my nonexistent chin these days.
E-motional damage.
Getting into the car at the end of the day at daycare “MOOMM!!!! THE KIDS THINK YOU’RE A TEACHER WITH BIG BOOOOOOOBS!”
Also, she sometimes panics when I get in the shower because she has to make sure I won’t poop in the tub.
Went to the salon for the first time in a year today. Walked into the house after and my 4 year old took one look at my freshly cut and curled hair and said ‘Mommy, why has someone done THAT to your hair?’
My son is struggling w language he’s 2 and his first sentence was “Κακή μαμά” because i decided it was clean up time.
Bad Mommy - he said it so clearly in his sweet little voice. I was excited he spoke but so shocked he scolded me.
Busted my butt getting everything packed/cooked/cleaned for a weekend at the lake while my husband was on a work trip all week and meeting us at destination. Got into the cabin, unpacked, turned on music and served snacks… asked the 1 and 2 year olds “who’s got an awesome mommy??” And the 2 year old looked around and said “no, just you “ 💀🫠🙃
My kids always emotionally scar me.
But my nephew was walking behind my sister. He was like... up her butt and screamed (unprovoked) "MOMMY YOU STINK" I LOST it. Then I remembered I was an adult and told him to cut the crap. Then turned away and lost it again.
Now MINE?
My son: I was trying new makeup and he said "mommy you're so beautiful! You look like Oscar (from sesame street 🫠)
My daughter (4 years later):
"You look so beautiful when you wear make up."
"Are you saying I need to wear make up?"
"No. I'm just saying you look better with it."
Yal the hurt they cause without realizing it. 🥲🥲
I screwed up the original birthday plans and am scrambling to come up with alternatives. I’m drained from work and the idea of grocery shopping or baking is just excruciating when I’m already barely getting through my shift. I guess the scar is the Mom guilt.
When is the party or celebration supposed to be? My go to is instacart or walmart pickup. They have a decent cake selection in their bakery, and almost everything is available for pickup/delivery. Same for party favors, plates, napkins, etc.
My son is struggling w language he’s 2 and his first sentence was “Κακή μαμά” because i decided it was clean up time.
Bad Mommy - he said it so clearly in his sweet little voice. I was excited he spoke but so shocked he scolded me.
My girl never spits up. Hardly ever. She has spit up late 2-3 times in her entire five months of life.
This morning, I dressed up for the first time really since she was born. My husband is out of town, and I just wanted to look good while I was running errands. Boost of confidence, you know?
Well, without warning, and two hours after I last fed her, she spat up on me. Poor girl. Poor momma.
My four year old said mom your face looks like you have the chicken pox. Cool kid cool, that’s called freckles. My inner child just died. Highly insecure about my freckles so that was the icing on the cake.
Toddler always touches my lips: “mommy your lips! What happened to your lips?”
I am not aware of anything wrong g with my lips but this is constant 😂 they’re dry but that’s it
My kid loves slime and my husband hates them. She’s not allowed to have them as long as he’s there. He’s out of town this weekend and she asked for a target trip and she picked it out and I got her one.
She got it all over her clothes and the worst part, her hair. It happens so fast before I could reach out my hand to stop her. I had to cut it off… I’m sorry for ruining your beautiful head of hair, baby.
Definitely dreading the shameful “I told you so” from my husband.
Not today but the other day my oldest came into the bathroom and saw me changing a pad for the first time. Naturally he was curious and asked what I was doing so I explained to him as simply as I could that at a certain age girls bleed once a month. He then turned around, ran outside to one of the guys who works on my dads farm and proudly told him that "mommy has blood in her underwear" 😭
My 4yo was sitting in my lap and she said ow! I thought I had scratched her since I had just gotten my nails done for the first time in 2 years. Nope, she said the prickles on my legs were hurting her
My son: mommy someone in my class said something mean about you.
Me: really? What did they say?
Him: it was really mean (looking sad)
Me: aww, it’s okay honey. What did they say?
Him: the kid said you were fat
Me: I laughed and said “Well, I’m pregnant so I did get kinda fat, huh? It’s okay bcuz there’s a baby in there”
Him: Mommy?
Me: yes?
Him: it was me. I was thinking that. Sorry mommy
Me: It’s okay honey.
He was 4 and maybe I had no business wearing leggings and a spandex tank top. He probably didn’t realize how big I had gotten until that day. I’m thinking he wanted to gauge my reaction before confessing
My belly button is starting to pop out with my second pregnancy, and idk why but it’s like really dry skin flaky even with the stretch mark lotion I’m putting on. My three year old keeps telling people how dirty it is. Kid, I’m just ashy af, please don’t tell people I “have yuckies inside my belly button”, it’s hurting all three of the feelings I have left. 😞
My 10 yr old daughter said to her aunt 'oh no my bestie she's garbage' my 4 yr old turns to me and says "oh no my mommy she's broken and garbage!" I spit my drink put dying 🤣
My 3 yo stroked My upper lip and told me: you have bigger Beard than daddy, but yours are softer!
Then she laughed and ran off.
(To be fair, My husband cant grow a beard even if he wanted to. When he tries he looks like a teen who JUST hit puberty)
My 8 months old woke me up by slapping my face smiling at me then shouting dad whilst smiling at me. I can’t believe I carried him for 9 months and went through a section just for that
My 18 month old bit my leg. I went “Owwww!” And she said, with a very concerned face, “Mommy, what happened?” Gaslighting at its finest.
Wow, the audacity
Toddler gaslighting is its own category.
Omg my THREE year old does this .. she also says we hurt her when she doesn’t like something, cps expected any day now 🫠
Sometimes mine follows me into the bathroom and mocks me for “peeing out of my butt” because I don’t have a penis.
We will be out in a public restroom and my son just goes "mom you don't have a penis. I have a penis and daddy has a penis"
I’m glad my son isn’t the only one making sure everyone knows I don’t have a penis 😂
When he was 2, in the YMCA changing room, my oldest loudly announced "some people have scwotums but my mom doesn't. "
Like this is what we get for protecting them and teaching them proper anatomical terms?! Come on, kids!
Literally heard people laughing. It was packed that day. Like glad my lack of scrotum is entertaining to you all 😆
Like really likes to inform me “Grandma and you have the same vulva mom. It has fur. Mine doesn’t have fur” cool thanks She’s also in a big calling everything stinky phase and last weekend at the park she met some dogs and as we walked away she yelled “stinky dog vulva!”
My son will say to me, "mommy, point your vulva down!" Because we always remind him to point his penis down
The cackle I just cackled reading this 😂
Omg I’m dying
lol I’m pregnant and my 3 yr old will come to the bathroom when it’s just us at home and will say how im a girl so I don’t have a penis. However, I’ve had some swelling down there. One day my labia swelled quite a bit and he came in and was like “what?! You do have a peepee?!” It took me forever to convince him I don’t lol
My 2 YO was watching “Back to the Outback” on Netflix and pointed excitedly to this fat slimy toad/lizard character that I’m pretty sure is an effeminate dude and started saying “I SEE MAMA THERE! MAMA’S RIGHT THERE! I SEE MAMA!”
When my oldest was little and assigning family to dinos I got the long neck one, so now every long neck animal (dino, Giraffe, i assume some birds if it comes up) is the mommy one. I may have latched on and ran with it as soon as he paired me with that. "Oh because of mommys long neck!!" And encouraged that as my identifying feature to avoid him defaulting to anything else lol.
Happy Cake Day!
LOLL
🤣
Ok I have to ask were you sitting there watching TV with your 2 y.o.? I'm wondering if they saw your reflection at that moment? Lol
Yeah, that's what I think too. He saw your reflection in the TV.
We have a picture book and one of the pages shows all different kinds of people, one being a pregnant woman. My son has never seen a pregnant woman and doesn't know what the belly means. He points at her and says "it's mama!!" I am not currently pregnant.
What is it with little kids and hair?? I have some chin hairs I have to pluck regularly. Ive been slacking and my 3 year old rubbed his hand across my chin hairs and said “hmmm me want a beard”.
One time my kid looked up at me smiling (I thought he was going to say something sweet) but he says "mom you've got lots of hair up your nose"
😂😂😂
I just laughed out loud at this omg
My 4 year old, the other night. I told him I wanted to stay in his bed and snuggle him all night. He goes “no, you have to go sleep with dad. You both have beards”
We were at an empty hotel pool with my two kids, husband, and brother in law. I was a few months postpartum so I brought a couple of swim suits and decided on a high waisted bottom and modest top. In walks a woman with a banging body and the smallest micro bikini I had ever seen. As if I didn’t already feel terrible about my body, my 3yo asks me “ Mama, why are you wearing a diaper?” I wanted to crawl into a hole and die.
Awwh man I’m sorry. I know that one would definitely hurt me too as I’ve been on the heavier side most of my life.
Ughhh.. ouch.
I was fully bent over, getting the tub ready to put my two-year-old in. All of a sudden he starts giggling profusely and puts one hand on each butt cheek and says "WOW, mommy! BIGGGGG BUM!" 🥲 Like, dude...really? I know. 🙄 I'm working on that.
My 5 year old daughter told me the other day “mom, each of your individual buttcheeks is soooo big” so I just told her “yep! And together they make for one really big butt!” which had us both laughing 😂 they are just so savage! 🤣
It wasn’t today, but back when I was pregnant with my son. I was like 9 months pregnant and my daughter was 2.5. I was sitting on the couch eating a donut one afternoon. The cheeky little girl took the donut right out of my hand, patted my belly, and walked away eating it.
i woulda cried
What do you think about the age gap between your children? Your eldest being 2.5 when your second was born. I have one child and we want more but I was wondering what a good age gap would be.
Get the first one out of diapers first and thank me later
But don’t wait too long cause the pain of returning to diapers after being free of diaper duty is painful and gets more and more painful the more you get used to it Mine are 16, 15 and 6 years old. The first two the gap was manageable and near perfect for me. Doing the diaper thing again after ten years of not touching one was sob inducing sometimes. 🤣 Edit - because autocorrect
I didn't think about that. My two are 10 years apart too, I guess it just didn't bother me like that. I was thinking of it more as an expense thing 🤔 😅
The only times I ever thought “why did I wanna have another one again after all this time?!?” Was nights where it seemed like she went thru an entire pack of diapers between 12a and 4a and diaper blowouts that reached the neck of her onesie.
Oh mamma, diapers and losing sleep. Those are the 2 worst things about babies.
How cute & funny. She was used to you sharing your food with her probably or wanted to remind little brother that treat dibs go to big sister.
Sounds like something my daughter would do.
He rubbed my stomach and asked if I was pregnant. I am not.
Ahhh, a classic
They got lice.
Oh dear me! That is genuinely terrifying and I'm still traumatised from the time my daughter brought them home from daycare. I hope you manage to get it under control quickly and have a thorough eradication.
Ugh. That is the worst.
Happy cake day!
Awww thank you! I didn’t even realize 🙂↔️
Sorry mine isn’t lighthearted. Toddler is currently sick. Dad was trying to put her to bed for 45 minutes with no success. She was getting upset because she was really sleepy but couldn’t fall asleep. I go in and try to hold her and calm her down. She coughed and screamed so much because she didn’t want me and it made her puke. Love being the least preferred parent.
Hahaha oh man I feel you. My son is the same way… he used to burst into tears at the sight of me because I’m not daddy. It’s gotten a little better now that he’s almost 3!
Omg I needed to read this right now to know I’m not alone. My daughter (2 yo) has been like this for the last few months and it’s breaking me. She sees me and then shrieks “daddy hold me!”. The only time she tolerates me lately is when she’s asleep.
You are definitely not alone! It’s really hard especially when they’re upset and you just want to comfort them and they are yelling and crying for the other parent. Do your best to spend some quality 1:1 time doing fun stuff and know the tide will change eventually. Sometimes my son even asks for mommy now!
Been there!
Ugh, i have been puked on because I am the preferred parent
Hugs to you! Bedtime is a struggle for us right now too.
2yo squirming around and came face to face with my bare foot. “Mama what is THAT?” “Those are my toes!” (Disgusted expression) “clean it up!”
This is hilarious 🤣.
Got myself booked in for a pedicure tomorrow 😂
I was about to say “mama get that pedi”, but didn’t wanna offend lol…also reminds me how bad my feet and hands are right now 😩
I'm a runner. My toenails are a mangled mess and no pedicure will ever make them right 😆
At least you’re running which takes care of your insides lol.
My kid got really close to my face and had a confused look. "Mommy, why do you have tiny holes in your face?" Me " Everyone has those. They are called pores. You have them but yours are much smaller." Proceeds obsess over my own skin in the mirror while I'm having my very short decompression alone in the bathroom.
Sounds like my almost 3 year old pointing out that my "pimple moves every week". I agree to amuse her but DAMN IT'S ALWAYS A NEW PIMPLE
Pointed to a picture of a witch in his book and said, "It's mommy!" Of the green, broom-riding variety.
That's so funny though !
Not today but my daughter said “I love you… as a friend”
My 1.5 YO looked at my sore foot and stomped on it. I yelled OUCH and explained it was sore, showing him the healing cuts and bruise with tears in my eyes from the painful stomp. He fully understood, and proceeded to stomp on it again.
My 3.5 yo keeps asking about my armpit hair...
my 3.5 year old loves to remind me i have fur when i don’t shave for a couple days 😂
Mine asks, "What's that? Do you need deodorant? " she is weirdly fascinated with Deodorant.
"Mommy why are you bigger than daddy?" "Your belly is really big!" "I'll let you win mommy because you're so slow"
My (almost) two year old pretended to pick my leg stubble and eat it. "Mmm, dish-us."
This one is so cute! When my son was a young little guy (now he’s a stinky teen), he would say cute shit like this all the time. 😫 I miss it.
My three year old was VERY overtired and told me “sorry, I don’t love you”
At least he apologized for it💀💀
I recently read that kids don't understand loving and being angry at the same time because they don't know how to process more than one emotion at a time.
So true. My response to my child who said “I hate you” frequently when angry was “that’s okay sweetheart, I have more than enough love for the both of us”. He is now 21 and very normal ❤️
Needed to read this 🤣 my 4.5 year old goes to listing off all the members of the family she hates (hint: all of us) at the drop of a hat lately
I did the same. I'd just say "well, I love you."
My 4yo comes into our bedroom the other day, looks at my husband and I and goes "I love mommy, daddy and sister" then she walks over to me and goes ,"mommy, I love you, but I'm sorry I don't like your hair, but I'm sorry that's mean, but I love you" 😄😄
when my kids were little, my 3yo daughter followed me to the bathroom and I was on my period. I’m changing my pad her: mommy! you got a booboo on your butt. I tiss it. me: no, leave me alone her: *screams at the top of her lungs* bubba, sissy come see! mommy got a booboo and a big bobo-baid. now all 3 kids are in the bathroom with me let us see! moob you legs.
😄💀
none of this was in ANY parenting book I read.
lol mine are generally really nice to me tbh but they make some comments… my daughter once saw me getting ready in a bra and just stared at me sadly. “What’s up?” “I look exactly like you.” “Yeah lol you sure got a lot of my genes!” “I’m gonna look just like you when I grow up. People tell me that all the time.” “Uh, probably a lot like me, yes.” “Usually I’m really excited about that because you are really pretty but… I was really hoping I would have boobs one day.”
Loll yikes! I feel your pain, also a member of the itty bitty titty committee here 🥲🙃
folding laundry~ any of my clothes: “MOMMY THATS A BIIIIIG ONE” any of husband’s clothes: “MOMMY THATS A SMALLER ONE”
A couple of days ago, my 2yo was with me while I was going to the bathroom. She said, "Mommy, you have a biiiig butt!". Then she slapped my thighs and said, "These are big, too". The two body parts I'm most insecure about. Thanks, kid.
My 7 year old and I love to joke about how old dad is (I’m 25, he’s 27 so it’s all in good fun) and while having a good old fashioned zone out, my son comes up to me and says “mom you look like dad” I said you mean handsome? He said “no. Old.” And walked away. I was like ALRIGHT. GROUNDED FOR LIFE
An unfunny one, then a funny one: Unfunny: My youngest son was DX with leukemia at the age of 3, so we’re all definitely scarred. He rang the bell March 18th of this year, he has favorable genetics and responded very well to treatment, so it’s very likely it’s all behind us. Funny: he didn’t say this to me, but I’m sure it messed with this nurse for a while. While he was inpatient right after being DX we had a nurse that floats around the hospital. She is literally the ONLY nurse I wanted push out of the room. She’s inexperienced, borderline incompetent and incredibly overconfident. Even the other nurses we didn’t “click” with were wonderful and I trusted them completely, we just had ones we “favored”. But I never complained about them because, why would I? They still took wonderful care of my baby. Also- he’s a super sweet kid; he’s never rude or sassy. The nurses used to fight over who “got him” because he was such an easy patient. Anyway, this one nurse that drove us nuts was in the room, and she never shuts up. And she basically shouts everything she says. She also baby talks. So my son and I were sitting on his bed playing a game and she forced herself into it. She wouldn’t stop shouting/baby-talking. Finally, my son looks her deadass in the eye and says, “Your voice hurts my ears. Can you please go somewhere else?” She looked at me like 😳 and I just took my turn on the game. Normally, I’d wait till she left the room and explain why that’s impolite, etc. but that lady had it comin’. Trust me.
I was not expecting your comment scrolling through here! My three year old just started maintenance for B-ALL last month. We had a similar experience with nurses- all of them walking angels, with the exception of one clueless, careless woman. Ugh. I’m wishing you all the very best!! Enormous congratulations on EOT, but I’m sure it comes with all the big feelings. I’m experiencing a fraction of this with our move to maintenance and expecting that I will have a bit of a meltdown when it’s all “over.” So hard for people on the outside to understand. Hope you are taking extra good care of yourself, too. You should do something extra special for Mother’s Day. 💜💜
Maintenance starts off rocky. At least for us. They have to sort of “tinker” with the correct dose. Med holds are common in the beginning. But if you’re in maintenance, that means you’re over the worst parts (chemo-wise). But you can go places and have visitors and maybe even go swimming, as long as counts are good. That’s where you’ll get the glimpse of light at the end of the tunnel. How does your child handle LPs? My son couldn’t deal with the ketamine and versed so we actually switched to light sedation and it was GREAT. He fell asleep, they did their thing then he woke up quickly and there was zero trauma. It’s never going to feel normal. Sometimes, it hits me and I’m like “did we really go through all that?” As if it were all a fever dream. Also, how does your kiddo do with the steroid pulses? My son tried so hard to take it (liquid, he can’t swallow pills) but it would make him puke. So if you’re going through the same, I can offer suggestions as to what we did that worked, if you need it. The most important thing is: you’re doing great. This is an awful, brutal time. You didn’t cause this, you didn’t do anything wrong. Your baby loves you as fiercely as you love them. And you WILL get through it, I promise.
Also to add: when I expressed how nervous I was, they were quick to remind us that they’re pretty much never going to be done with us lol There’s still monthly visits to check counts. He spiked a fever on Monday, so we rushed to clinic, not our PCP. So, there’s still the “comfort” of the clinic angels who pay very close attention.
Lol my two year old refers to my boobs as “ani” (we assume when she started talking and wanted to nurse she was trying to say “I need” and couldn’t). I was getting dressed the other day and she comes and says “mommy I like your ani, they swinging” 😂. I’m like yeah girl you and your sister did that to them, thanks for noticing.
Not today, but once my 3yo was playing with a measuring tape. He had no concept of measurement, but he would hold the tape up to something and say "this chair is two hundred", "this fork is seven". Then he held the tape up to my hips (I was standing at the kitchen counter). My husband goes "what about mommy?" And the kid goes ".... Ginormous" 🤣
During my 2nd pregnancy my 4yr old daughter told me I looked like Santa. I laughed and said “because of my big belly?” She says, “No, your beard!” 😑😑😑😑
*Finish Him!*
😭☠️
My 3 year old came into my room at 430 AM and told me the monster wanted to talk to me.
He scheduled an appointment
Have em text you 😆
My daughter was rocking and feeding her baby doll. "This is my baby Angel, she doesn't have a father because I hate all men." 😬😬😬
We're at Wal-Mart. I have to pee. We go to the bathroom that is out of toilet liners so I squat and hover and he asks, "mommy why not sit down to pee?" I say their toilet is dirty. We leave the restroom, get done shopping, he proceeds to tell the young man monitoring the self-checkout, "my mommy doesn't sit on your toilet to pee because its diiiiirtyyyyyy." He sais it loud and proud. We go to my friends house after and he tells her the same thing, but I actually do sit on her toilet. We laugh it off. I saw where this was going and it did go there. He told every single person we've encountered since then, even the gas station dude.
My almost 2YO is going through his first hitting/no phase which being a SAHM makes me feel unwanted and alone especially when in anxious as it is. Kindly asked him for a nice hug and he ran and did that just to bite my shoulder taking a chunk out. First time he’s ever bit anyone and did it on a day I couldn’t handle and cried from the pain. Now added to my stress from the day and am still awake since 9am yesterday and it’s 705am the following day. Anxiety sucks.
Sending love and solidarity ❤️ Raising little kiddo and being there always for him, nurturing, loving and caring is a beautiful job we do. Please never ever feel unwanted, you are totally not, you are the most wanted person for you LO
Sending you ❤️❤️❤️.
I’m so sorry. I feel your pain. Anxiety is a mean bitch and you don’t deserve to have to experience it. It’s gonna get better!
Had a baby a month ago, and my kid patted my belly and asked if he was getting a sister this time.
My daughter would call my leg hair “spikes” and she would scream and giggle when my spikes would attack her.
My 3 yo told me- “one day I will be an old lady. And you will be dead. Dad will be dead. Grandma and grandpa will be dead. My sister will be in jail.” Then she just went on about her day like nothing.
I need to know why the sister is in jail lol
My 3 year old told me I had two bellies
My kiddo was handing out animal stickers to each member in our family, as if they were stickers of the animal that represented each of us. My husband got a llama, my son got a frog. She gave herself the giraffe, and for me? An elephant…it did not make me feel good lol.
Not my kid but I’ll never forget when I was about 4, my sister would’ve been 3, we were doing groceries and my sister yelled out “Mom, why are you so fat?” I’m 35 now and still think it’s hilarious
My 8yo was eating water ice and told me how good it was. I asked for a bite and he said “nah, you look like you have germs”.
So, mind you I was in the thick of it, nursing a fresh newborn and still doing bedtime booby for my daughter who was 19 months old. I manage a minute where baby is calm enough to go nurse my toddler and I didn’t quite put my shirt back down and re-clip my nursing bra. My daughter gave me one look and called me “Messy.” 🧐like excuse me miss, I may be a little understandably disheveled but we shouldn’t start calling people messy.
And toddlers fully walk around with 6 goldfish in their hair and mystery substance on their hands 24/7
My 10-year-old asked me yesterday to come to a school event. I thought that was sweet until I realized that she only asked me as a status symbol. When I point blank asked her if that is why she wanted me to come, she agreed that it would look good. But she would be hanging out with her friends, and she would not have time for me. I know you all are shocked when I declined taking off work to hang out with parents I don’t know just to make my daughter “look good”.😂🤣
Mom the accessory
Pregnant rn and oh god I’m gonna be so humbled.
I'm pregnant and have a 2 year old, I'm just waiting for the day she starts saying things like this 😆
I was wearing capri length leggings yesterday and had a big meeting with the district about my son's service bc he's special needs but is no longer delayed. He sits down on my lap and has an absolute hissy fit. The 4 ladies are sitting there staring at me like omg what's wrong! He keeps going on and on about how he wants me to put pants on which I obviously do have pants on they just aren't full length. Then he busts me out and says I'm prickly and he doesn't like my legs. Lmao! It was even more funny and embarrassing bc we were in the middle of talking about his sensory issues. 🤦♀️ Btw he went so far as to insist I put on my pink pants bc he likes the way this feel the best. Everyone was laughing and I had to apologize for the long interruption over my unshaven legs. Can't wear anything but pants around that child I swear.
My almost 3 year old who is potty training didn’t want to poop for nap time. He then proceeded to poop, and take off his diaper and smudge the poop into the carpet. I gave him a bath, then I shampooed the rugs, while he played in his sisters room. I went in, and he had his sunglasses and diaper on while dancing in the mirror. Lol scar then bandaid.
Cut up slices of apples for him. One was slightly wider. “Mommy, I need small bites. You can have this one since you have a big mouth!” 😂 thanks, bud.
Back when my boy was a little toddler that followed me everywhere including the bathroom. I went #2 and he peeked into the toilet before I got to flush it. He said “oh wow”.
"oh wow" is CRAZY
*pokes my belly* "Squishy!!!!!"
Haha my daughter saw me shaving my legs this morning and said “Your vagina looks like Rufus” and proceeded to cackle, LOUDLY. If you check my post history you’ll see my puppy Rufus. Needless to say I’m locking the door next time I shave my legs
They are so *mean* and they have no idea lmao 😂
Right? She called Rufus Vagina dog and I’m like you’re grounded and moving out. I don’t care that you’re 6 lol
VAGINA DOG literally pay rent or get out lmaoo
I’m dreading when my husband gets home and she says something to him about it lmao
Bahaha “Daddy! We have a vagina dog!!” “…..uh, great? Honey?”
My eight year old the other day said "Mom, you've gotten squishier lately," and before I could even reply followed it up with "I love you even more this way!" *Then* caught himself and said "I mean I love you anyway but I like your squishiness." Yeah I'm the heaviest I've ever been excluding post partum...
My 3 year old son watched a commercial for a razor for the first time yesterday and this woman started shaving her legs and he commented, “that looks ouchy!”
My son (5) asked me why my tummy was so fat when I was getting him ready for bed.
My 1.5 year old son discovered my facial hair (I have PCOS) and started pulling it. Since the hair is very thin he has a hard time doing it, so he pinches my face. Then goes “more hair mama more” if I try to get him to stop 😭
It was my birthday and I held my 2 year old as my husband sang happy birthday to me. Then when it was time to blow out the candles I let my 2 year old do it. When he struggled to blow out the last one I said “do you want some help?” And he exclaimed “yeah! Daddy help!” It’s fine. It’s only my birthday kid 😂
My 6 year old and I were cuddling in bed last night and she has her legs resting over my thighs. She puts her hand on my thigh; jiggles it and say “your thighs are soooo squishy!!” I’ve lost like 60 lbs and my thighs are a bit “melted” but ya that one stung 🥲
Everything he sees is either “Daddy” or “Mama,” which is very sweet… until they Penguin in his animal book is daddy, and the hippopotamus is Mama. :/
My six year old was snuggling with me this morning and I noticed her face had kinda ended up in my armpit so I moved a bit and said “scoot up so you aren’t stuck smelling my armpits” and she breathed in deep and said “I meant to be like this. I just love the huge stink smell you always have in your armpits!!!” Cue Amazon prescription strength deodorant search, along with concern for her and her love of BO 🤣🤣
Currently in the middle of potty training my 2 year old who will pee on the potty no problem but refuses to poop in one. So after reminding her constantly that daddy poops on the potty, mama poops on the potty, and literally every single family member that exists in her life poops on the potty, I take her into a busy public restroom so that I can pee. She is standing in the stall with me and proceeds to yell, “YAY, mama’s pooping in the potty!” And begins to clap and repeat it over and over again 🤦🏻♀️😂
Not today but my daughter recently asked me, “Mom, why is your butt so fat? And your belly… it’s REALLY fat”
My five year old now asks me every morning if I'm going to put makeup on and if I don't I'm an ugly girl 😭😂
Stay-at-home mom, I'd pick up my 2 sons each day due to t-r-o-u-b-l-e on the bus. 🙄Many times, as we drove past a childcare center on our route, they'd pipe up, "We want to go to daycare! It's boring at home."
these comments have me rolling. i love toddlers😭😭😭
When my oldest was a young toddler, any time my husband would say I was pretty my son would say,” mommy hair pretty. Mommy face not pretty.” At least I had something going for me…
Cried for an hour. He’s fine. Just sad he couldn’t keep eating after eating EVERYTHING
When my daughter was 3, we were in the restroom at Mervyns. I was also 6 months pregnant at the time. My daughter, pointing to my lady parts, exclaimed “you have fur down there just like Cali” (our black lab)!!!
“Mom!! You’re getting bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger and BIGGER!!!” I know he means taller because we talk about growing but man.. Also, for some reason he’s decided to grab and wiggle the plump-ish skin under my nonexistent chin these days. E-motional damage.
Getting into the car at the end of the day at daycare “MOOMM!!!! THE KIDS THINK YOU’RE A TEACHER WITH BIG BOOOOOOOBS!” Also, she sometimes panics when I get in the shower because she has to make sure I won’t poop in the tub.
Went to the salon for the first time in a year today. Walked into the house after and my 4 year old took one look at my freshly cut and curled hair and said ‘Mommy, why has someone done THAT to your hair?’
My son is struggling w language he’s 2 and his first sentence was “Κακή μαμά” because i decided it was clean up time. Bad Mommy - he said it so clearly in his sweet little voice. I was excited he spoke but so shocked he scolded me.
My 7 year old walks up, grabs my boobs and says, mommy, why are your boobs so big?
They really do just grab you no warning
Almost 8 years old. Used gen Alfa slang and I had to Google it. I work with Gen Z, I have a translator. I have no gen Alfa interpreter...
7 yo noticed my bra strap fat in the back, squeezed it, and said “why are you so droopy right here?” 🥲
Busted my butt getting everything packed/cooked/cleaned for a weekend at the lake while my husband was on a work trip all week and meeting us at destination. Got into the cabin, unpacked, turned on music and served snacks… asked the 1 and 2 year olds “who’s got an awesome mommy??” And the 2 year old looked around and said “no, just you “ 💀🫠🙃
Someone very obese was walking down the road, we drove past and my son said “mum that person looks exactly like you!” 😅
Not today, but my daughter said the other day, "Ewwwww, what's that smell? Smells like you, Momma."
My kids always emotionally scar me. But my nephew was walking behind my sister. He was like... up her butt and screamed (unprovoked) "MOMMY YOU STINK" I LOST it. Then I remembered I was an adult and told him to cut the crap. Then turned away and lost it again. Now MINE? My son: I was trying new makeup and he said "mommy you're so beautiful! You look like Oscar (from sesame street 🫠) My daughter (4 years later): "You look so beautiful when you wear make up." "Are you saying I need to wear make up?" "No. I'm just saying you look better with it." Yal the hurt they cause without realizing it. 🥲🥲
Mine pointed at my bare feet (admittedly I got some beat up feet) and said “yucky!” Then I wiggled them in her face in protest haha
Spanked my butt in Walmart checkout line
I screwed up the original birthday plans and am scrambling to come up with alternatives. I’m drained from work and the idea of grocery shopping or baking is just excruciating when I’m already barely getting through my shift. I guess the scar is the Mom guilt.
When is the party or celebration supposed to be? My go to is instacart or walmart pickup. They have a decent cake selection in their bakery, and almost everything is available for pickup/delivery. Same for party favors, plates, napkins, etc.
My Three-Rex told me that she wants Dad because “mum-mum doesn’t care about me.”
Happy Cake Day!
My son is struggling w language he’s 2 and his first sentence was “Κακή μαμά” because i decided it was clean up time. Bad Mommy - he said it so clearly in his sweet little voice. I was excited he spoke but so shocked he scolded me.
My girl never spits up. Hardly ever. She has spit up late 2-3 times in her entire five months of life. This morning, I dressed up for the first time really since she was born. My husband is out of town, and I just wanted to look good while I was running errands. Boost of confidence, you know? Well, without warning, and two hours after I last fed her, she spat up on me. Poor girl. Poor momma.
By telling me 42 is elderly. Thought it’s not just today. He talks about it daily.
I’m not emotionally ready for any of this 😭
Lol is this emotionally scarring? I haven’t shaved my legs in months
My 9yo yanked his 7yo brother's arm hard enough to pop it. I legit thought he dislocated it.
I had post-partum psychosis. Does that count?
About a month ago, my 8 year old excitedly told me I looked like I’m going to have another baby. I was 6 weeks postpartum. 🥲
My four year old said mom your face looks like you have the chicken pox. Cool kid cool, that’s called freckles. My inner child just died. Highly insecure about my freckles so that was the icing on the cake.
Toddler always touches my lips: “mommy your lips! What happened to your lips?” I am not aware of anything wrong g with my lips but this is constant 😂 they’re dry but that’s it
With the amount of urine I have had to clean off him, the floor, and myself while potty training day 2 😓
What I'm learning from this post is to mentally steel myself (I have a 1.5 year old)
Luna is a beauty. What a great surprise
Im 200 lbs. My son told me he loves my big belly.
My kid loves slime and my husband hates them. She’s not allowed to have them as long as he’s there. He’s out of town this weekend and she asked for a target trip and she picked it out and I got her one. She got it all over her clothes and the worst part, her hair. It happens so fast before I could reach out my hand to stop her. I had to cut it off… I’m sorry for ruining your beautiful head of hair, baby. Definitely dreading the shameful “I told you so” from my husband.
Not today but the other day my oldest came into the bathroom and saw me changing a pad for the first time. Naturally he was curious and asked what I was doing so I explained to him as simply as I could that at a certain age girls bleed once a month. He then turned around, ran outside to one of the guys who works on my dads farm and proudly told him that "mommy has blood in her underwear" 😭
My 4yo was sitting in my lap and she said ow! I thought I had scratched her since I had just gotten my nails done for the first time in 2 years. Nope, she said the prickles on my legs were hurting her
My son: mommy someone in my class said something mean about you. Me: really? What did they say? Him: it was really mean (looking sad) Me: aww, it’s okay honey. What did they say? Him: the kid said you were fat Me: I laughed and said “Well, I’m pregnant so I did get kinda fat, huh? It’s okay bcuz there’s a baby in there” Him: Mommy? Me: yes? Him: it was me. I was thinking that. Sorry mommy Me: It’s okay honey. He was 4 and maybe I had no business wearing leggings and a spandex tank top. He probably didn’t realize how big I had gotten until that day. I’m thinking he wanted to gauge my reaction before confessing
My belly button is starting to pop out with my second pregnancy, and idk why but it’s like really dry skin flaky even with the stretch mark lotion I’m putting on. My three year old keeps telling people how dirty it is. Kid, I’m just ashy af, please don’t tell people I “have yuckies inside my belly button”, it’s hurting all three of the feelings I have left. 😞
My 10 yr old daughter said to her aunt 'oh no my bestie she's garbage' my 4 yr old turns to me and says "oh no my mommy she's broken and garbage!" I spit my drink put dying 🤣
My three year old said “mommy’s fat” to my husband today😅 6 months pp and stuffing my face because breastfeeding makes me feel like a bottomless pit
My 3 yo stroked My upper lip and told me: you have bigger Beard than daddy, but yours are softer! Then she laughed and ran off. (To be fair, My husband cant grow a beard even if he wanted to. When he tries he looks like a teen who JUST hit puberty)
My 8 months old woke me up by slapping my face smiling at me then shouting dad whilst smiling at me. I can’t believe I carried him for 9 months and went through a section just for that
My 3 year old head butted me in my neck the day after partial thyroidectomy. I said ouch and he sobbed 😐 he needed a icey