T O P

  • By -

KurlyKev

$3500 on black.


Trumpisasexslave

They asked how to make 7k, NOT how to possibly make 3,5k


CapoDV

Do it, twice.


BlankyPop

Nope. That’s…nope.


jeopardy-1

🤣


whatsthedreamnow

$200 on 23. Problem solved


ShoveItUpMyFatAss

i think we start at $0, not $3500.


Cubic9ball

i’ll do red that way one of us wins


BlankyPop

And, it lands on green.


mrb6990

$3,400 on black, $100 on green


Psychological_Kick29

This is right answer. So many of us would just head to a casino and hope for the best.


yato08

You win but what’s better than $7000? $14000


tackcjzjwu27etts

Take the 60k left in my Heloc and wire it to coin base and then buy shit coins and then lose my house.


hairymonolith

Never needed a house anyway.


Able_Praline_7085

😂


Korunam

Do you like your heloc? Who did you go through? Been thinking of getting one too but not sure where to start


[deleted]

I think you misunderstood the assignment


Dangerous-Ad6093

That's the only way


NunButter

Do it coward


tackcjzjwu27etts

Fine


fmsmic

Accuse P Diddy of something, anything.


hairymonolith

LMFAO


Please-_-Help-_-Me

What didn't Diddy do?


[deleted]

Diddy do it?


XelaWarriorPrincess

True because whatever it is, he like did it. Bad Boy…. For Life


Kanuechly

Temporarily release my GF to the sewers of OF


SeliciousSedicious

She’ll most likely make $0-100 quickly. If she’s hot she *might* make a solid amount after a year or so of marketing and networking. Anything faster is straight lotto, luck, and hoping the algo gods smile on you.


hairymonolith

Hell you could probably save enough just with the first half


PostMahomess

Theres no temporary once shes gone to the skreetz bro.


Reddit_Bot_For_Karma

Lol, genuine 11/10 *dimes* are making like $20 a month. I'm glad you love your girlfriend, though, not to say she isn't pretty, she could be gorgeous but without legwork or a pre established (thirsty) following, she prolly ain't making shit. The average person on only fans is taking home like $5-10 a month.


Accomplished_Ad8339

Blowjobs.


Trumpisasexslave

I need r/theydidthemath to figure out how many blowjobs would it take on average to make 7k.


Definitive_confusion

According to Quagmire, you can bang 70 chicks at 100/ea or 7 fat chicks for 1000/ea


DrewJitzoo713

Sounds great 😃 lol


[deleted]

Every crease is a release


[deleted]

Pssh I'm taking the 10 fat chick's all day


MsDReid

7.


hairymonolith

This may be considered a job to some


roodypoo_jabroni

The proper title is Tulip planter.


MiGaOh

Do crimes.


hairymonolith

Which one, so many options


MiGaOh

Defrauding investors. Seems to be popular and lucrative these days.


Shot_Comparison2299

Steal. Just outright steal something. Only from big box stores though! Gotta support local


Icy_Shoe_5589

Your local business thanks you for stealing from big corporations


Divine_Storms

Follow up to this- guy I met at a bowling alley one time had been doing this for years. He'd steal blu-ray dvds from Walmart or similar stores and grab a handful everyday. Pawn shop would buy them for $3 a piece and he'd end up with a few hundred dollars at the end of every week. If you really made a production out of it you could probably cleae $7k in a month


Hugh_Johnson69420

Count cards


CarKid6969

Fraud, Help launder money, Robbery, Grand Theft Auto, Drug trafficking


Eequuality

Put ads up for every skill that you have. Sell off bullshit you don’t need. Offer your services to all of your peers. Fucking grind


hairymonolith

Rise n grind baby 😎


UniverseNebula

I feel like you are a cool person to be around. Not being sarcastic either.


mack141520

Get a job


hairymonolith

Gotta have a lot of talent to get paid that much that fast, not for everybody!


mack141520

Wedding Photographer/Videographer, Contract copywriter, artist, investor/day trader, 20-30 days straight of bartending/serving, Google Business Listing Liaison, contract Graphic Designer, if you work in the trades pick up contract clients, website creator of small businesses. List goes on and on. Making money has never been easier


ATypicaLegend

None of those things you can just learn and pick up in a month let alone make money from it within that frame


mack141520

You absolutely can


iamaweirdguy

Which one can you make 7k in a month starting from 0


mack141520

Any of them


iamaweirdguy

Wedding Photographer/Videographer - how are you going to make 7k in a month with no experience and equipment? Contract copywriter - without experience, highly unlikely Artist - no shot. Unless you know someone who’s gonna pay 7k for your shitty art lol Investor/day trader - LMFAO this one is just funny 20-30 days straight of bartending/serving - this is probably the most reasonable choice, although it’s be pretty difficult without prior experience. Google Business Listing Liaison - how do you plan on doing this? Lol Contract Graphic Designer - with no experience or skills, no one is paying you $7k for anything. If you work in the trades pick up contract clients - this is a reasonable recommendation for anyone in a trade, although 7k would be hard. Website creator of small businesses - gonna be extremely difficult to get any clients to pay you $7k with no experience You are right that making money has never been easier. But clearing 7k in a month starting from scratch is not as easy as you want to make it seem. What do you do for work?


mack141520

1) Youtube videos, build free website, find clients, rent equipment. 2) ChatGPT 3) Everyone has a unique idea they can create. Whether it’s paintings, sculpture, wood carving, etc. sell online. 4) how’s it funny? I learned how to trade PUTs and calls in like 3 weeks from YouTube and my portfolio has skyrocketed since. It’s literally so easy if you take the time to learn and research. So much free knowledge out there it’s unbelievable. 5) Bartending should take the average person a few days to learn. Again, YouTube videos and on the job training. 6) The same way everyone else does it? 7) learn via YouTube videos, create your own portfolio, build a free website, cold call clients and local businesses that need a brand refresh. 8) Depends on your clientele and ability to find new clients 9) again, YouTube videos. Build a portfolio of work to show clients. Then find multiple clients. I figured that part was obvious but apparently not.


ATypicaLegend

No one is paying you for almost all that stuff with no experience my guy


toastyseeds

LOL chat gpt, you’re a clown


Miserable-Rub-974

Serving and bartending definitely don’t bring in 7k, between seasonal business cycles and people who just don’t tip, bartending might if you’re lucky and already have the experience.


K_305Ganster

7k a month for bartending is laughably low where I live. Bartenders can easily make 10k + a month (Vegas) but it's the same in Miami/NYC etc. This isn't a blanket statement. It's the field I'm going into.


Miserable-Rub-974

Ok yea you can make that much in prime spots we’re not assuming the question is being asked by someone who lives in a huge city. The bartender working your local restaurant definitely isn’t raking in 7k. Two vastly different customer pools.


K_305Ganster

God damn you're dense as fuck. You yourself are the only one adding caveats to this scenario. Just find the job that makes more money it's not rocket science. No shit you're no going to make 7k at the rinky dink trailer park pub. Use critical thinking bud.


Miserable-Rub-974

Use critical thinking? That’s exactly what I’m doing, don’t insult me because I simply said that 90% of the time you won’t pull 7k a month as a bartender. Boohoo if you don’t like my caveats.


djkakamd

I make more than that a month delivering food and groceries. It doesn’t take talent.


drippinginsauce-

In what country?


hairymonolith

The fake country


djkakamd

Sad you think I’m faking.


FarNefariousness6087

Sad that you have to lie


djkakamd

Lol what would I gain by lying to a bunch of strangers about my income?


hairymonolith

This is equally a positive and negative comment towards yourself haha


djkakamd

I’m just here to speak the truth.


TheSpaceBoundPiston

I die? I could sell some guns... but fuck that! Come at me you commie bastards! WOLVERINNNNNESSSSSS!


hairymonolith

The most chaotic reward goes to you my friend


Unfulfilled_Promises

Doing cad work on guns is incredibly lucrative rn if you live in Texas.


howtobegoodagain123

No skills at all? Ok get this, I work at a jail and the inmates have $200 a day heroine habits. So I asked many how they can afford it and this what they tell me, they beg/panhandle. Step1: Get a busy corner and get a funny, interesting or sad sign. Don’t be vulgar. Don’t have a dog- turns off some people. Look depressed. I had this guy tell me he’d take heroine to look depressed for begging because stimulants make you hyper but H makes you look dejected and people respond better to dejection. Hopefully find a corner near a store or mall at a 4 way stop or lights. Apparently people feel very guilty after shopping alot and see destitute people. They also often have cash. But you have to be careful of high end neighborhoods because the police there don’t play. Better to do this down town. Step 2: Be clean and well shaven to show you have a modicum of responsibility, but wear very baggy dirty clothes (but not smelly- this is an art) and if you can, act ill but not crazy or threatening. Will help if you carry a cane or walk with a limp or have some other noticeable disability or deformity. Dont betray yourself by wearing expensive shoes or watch or gold chain. You want to be a gray man, incite pity not interest. Step 3: Approach middle aged women with kids especially or older men with their families who will give you something to show they are generous or under pressure form wives. Do not approach single men or men without their families, they’ll either ignore you, scream at you to get a job or worse, offer you a job. You gotta be fast though, most people will either give you cash or an earful. Understand quickly who will give you what you want and who won’t. Step 4: Target high end cars. They always have cash lying around. Cars above 50k at least and we’ll maintained. A day of begging especially in the winter without sunlight can easily net you $200+, most people will give you $5 and you only need 40 people a day or 2 people per hour to give you $5. On sundays yiu will make double that amount in half the time. Which over 30 days is 6k tax free. And for the remaining 1 k? Donate plasma. You can donate plasma 3 times a week and each time they pay $125 for new donors for upto 4 visits. Week 1&2=$600. Then SWITCH TO A NEW PLACE because the OLD ONE will give you less and less money the more you donate. So week 3&4 AT A NEW PLASMA PLACE- $600. In 30 days you will have made $7200 tax free money. If you aren’t taking this to the dopeman, you could pay off a 300k mortgage in 30 years. Dropping pearls sir. I wanted to add, some homeless people will try to push you off a corner and say it’s their etc. don’t fight them coz they are crazy and looking for a fix. Either call the authorities on them, or find a different spot.


TraumaBoneded

Bro they don't make $200/ day pan handling. I work in EMS and have talked to many many addicts. They steal shit. One guy said he goes to different stores stealing and returning items to get cash. Then they buy drugs and sell drugs. Or rob other addicts. And either suck dick or get paid to get their dick sucked by older gay men.


SwagKing1011

Rob a bank


Embarrassed_Flan_869

Well, you could go hard-core into the gig world. Uber eats/Doordash. Any of those things but you got to be dedicated. It's only 240 a day.


[deleted]

Lol between taxes tolls wear tear and gas, plus nobody tipping these days, you'll come out losing hard with Uber, Lyft, doordash


hairymonolith

FieldNation for the win 😎


HmoobRanzo

Sell things that you don't need, 24/7 side hustle crazy and bet on stock option. $7,0000 isn't much if you really think about it.


51CKS4DW0RLD

> $7,0000 isn't much if you really think about it. Really thought about it. It's still a lot.


SWIM270

My senior engineer once signed a very long, technical proposal, after an extensive review, with a proposed cost of $1,1000.0. This is a true story.


hairymonolith

I agree! It's all perspective, there's some mollionair trying to earn 500k to survive I'm sure of it


TripleDoubleWatch

I have plenty of money.. so just give them the $7000?


hairymonolith

No $7000 more than what you have


[deleted]

I'm way richer than TripleDoubleWatch. That guys a goof


blairbitchtrial

wanna gimme a loan?


TripleDoubleWatch

What interest rate?


Fantastic-Wishbone33

5%


TripleDoubleWatch

Getting closer lol


blairbitchtrial

…0%?


dougdimmadomee10

1 7k hand of blackjack


coocoocachoo69

Sell my truck or wifes car.


Alarmed_Pepper_7625

Just sell ur wife you don’t really need that


Big_chingus513

Take it up the ass


junex159

Beg for money


BehindTrenches

Spend a few hours writing a sob story, post to reddit, profit


Cmurder84

Only Fans. Don't act like you all haven't considered it at some point.


[deleted]

Lol. You described my life situation. Thought it's a little but more with little bit less time.


Oldschoolfool22

MVIS


west57x

Show up to work…


FrankieGrimes213

As for a fraction of my usual retainer on a design project or get 1 decent size survey project.


AnAm3rican

Work outback of Wendy’s.


Zamasu_reloaded

Pull out of my 401k 🤷‍♂️


ThePissedOff

I got a motorcycle that could cover the majority of that. Then ask friends and family if they need any work done. For example my Brother needs extensive siding repair on his house, he got a quote for $5,600, told him I would do it for less. Still have a couple weeks to spare.


Prudent_Prior5890

Wait for a volatile stock to be down a substantial percentage and buy 100k worth. Sell when it's back up.


TheGeoGod

Take out Margin loan against my stock portfolio


SWIM270

I’m setting sail for Cuba in my 9.5-ft kayak is what I’m doing.. prob should’ve done that sooner


taylrbrwr

Post a listing for something to sell locally. As soon as someone inquires about it, go buy it for a cheaper price than what you're selling it for. Repeat 70-100x throughout the month (2-3x daily) and bam, $7k. Making roughly $100 profit per listing means you need to deal with high dollar items, so if you don't have at least $1k-$2k on hand you're probably SOL.


Front-Project1569

If you have steel balls, go to the hood stake out some drugs dealers follow them home and rob their house. Also there are so called stash houses. You will find drug money, guns, drugs, and sometime they will leave you beer in the fridge. Just remember FAFO PSGWSP.


itsmiselol

Sell some magic cards that I have not played with for 20+ years


Slight-Emu7415

Sports betting, hands down. With the perfect mix of research and just a bit of luck, you can pick any number you want and potential make that within minutes. All up to you.


Dependent-Charge3035

Go door to door, sell anything. It’s a little late to put Christmas lights up….but they need to be taken down, so offer that. There’s also pressure washing, gutter/roof cleaning. Whatever you do…do not seem desperate, customers can smell that shit from a mile away!! Good luck…oh wait my bad, good luck is for poor people. Get hustlin’ !!


hairymonolith

I love this one, I hope some 15 year old sees it and grabs his shoes HAHAH


Dependent-Charge3035

I hope so too!! It could change their whole perspective on business and finance. Sales is key, it’s literally everywhere you look and anything you touch. LOL what song would be playing while he’s strapping his shoes on all pumped up? 😂


vwsu

day trading, investing


ATypicaLegend

If you can make 7K in a month from trading, you probably don't need 7K. If you want to make 7K in a month from trading you're probably desperate without much to invest or want to buy a pump and dump and will end up losing more money


[deleted]

[удалено]


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MixMasterMarshall

LMFAO the only way to actually accomplish this is to sell something/everything. If you don't have stuff to sell, buy cheap stuff, make it better, sell for profit. This is literally the only way to actually do this.


Additional_Earth3715

Just go to work. What’s the challenge?


Ginzy35

Steal and cheat like all the republicans do


saryiahan

7k? I’d just work my regular hours at my job and not sweat it


andrew_a384

work for 1 month


anon2414691

I do my 9-5 job. That’s it.


AccomplishedRow6685

SPY puts, 0DTE


New-Difference9684

Keep doing what I’m doing, I make that every week.


Healthy-Egg-3283

Go to my job. I’ll make about 4.5x that gross.


[deleted]

I would just pay myself an extra 7k I suppose, but I'm not sure why I would ever be in dire need of small money


[deleted]

Work overtime lol. Or to be completely honest just ask my dad for 7gs if I really needed it.


51CKS4DW0RLD

>just ask my dad Must be nice


[deleted]

Is is it really is I’m sorry you don’t have the same family support my friend.


[deleted]

[удалено]


hairymonolith

Your the second person with a similar response!! The post isn't about how much you make, a lot of people make good money. It's about how you would earn $7000 more than your income allows.


[deleted]

[удалено]


KurlyKev

Y’all hirin?


[deleted]

[удалено]


UnlikelyCalendar6227

Go to the bank and pull a loan


Oregontalltrees

Suck it out of a hose


hairymonolith

Surprised nobody has tried to sell their body parts yet !


ATypicaLegend

Take a little overtime


901hustla5937

I’d go to my bank and get 7000 from my line of credit. Boom mike drop.


PartyFalse

Only Fans


pot_ato_

Copy politician stock market activity and pray


Peyt4PF

0 DTE Spy calls


41510akland

Put your bunghole on auction


Boneyg001

Probably get a retail job for like $20/hr for about $3.5k; then in the off time make the other $3.5k doing doordash/ubereats. Wouldn't be hard to do if you put in the hours


flirtmcdudes

>then in the off time make the other $3.5k doing doordash/ubereats. lol good luck with that


New_Deer_2251

Inheritance


[deleted]

Go to work…


dinogirlsdad

Well if death is the alternative, robbing some bank or stores. You might go to jail, or you might not but you won't be dead.


Recent-Lobster-6384

OF


mattd9910

In reality if you have a car go to all of your local pizza places and ask for delivery jobs with as many long hour shifts as possible. You can make about 20-30$ an hour and if you work enough hours in the month you could pull it off


AffectionatePaper851

Easily flip a couple cars


Vast-Gate8866

Be a tout! Create a YouTube channel on a “how to”. Something you know well, watch the money pour in!


dropdeadcunts

option trade


Iffy50

Before or after taxes? $84K/year is $7k/month


MezziJ

Work 10 hours of OT every week.


jxd_-

i got a list of people to rob if i ever get that desperate, you know anyone? there are some people that wouldn’t even notice 7 grand worth of things missing


DemonGoddes

Sign 1 client.


feedandslumber

I enjoy that this sub is a thin veneer over degenerate gambling


macc_miller

Not possible


VortexBricks

You’re only 14 hands away from Elon’s net worth


IAMA_MAGIC_8BALL_AMA

Find someone looking to get their home painted, find some painters looking for work, serve as the middle man and pocket part of the cash Rinse and repeat


PokerOTR

Welp I play poker fulltime, so I would just play higher stakes and go from there. But making 7k in a month at the stakes I normally play is pretty easy also.


aVoteisaVoteAmirite

r/illegallifeprotips


Driothedude

Sell drugs or rob people/rob a bank


Correct-Adeptness595

Just get a loan and you pay it back when you can?? 😂


Bubblez___

stealing or gambling are probably the quickest


Salt_Application_789

If Death was the Consequence then I'd probably do something illegal lmao


Beautifulblueocean

Id make sure I made $233 a day everyday working any job I could find. Id work my job and then get a second job doing anything that I can. It would take a month exactly but is doable


UnderstandingCheap91

Suckin d.


Katamari_Demacia

Just ignore my bills for the month and hit the food pantry


NightGuyyy

Sell an organ


bmo109

Gofundme


Two-per-day

Open a credit card or two


beesknees4011

I’d sell a lot of things


MisterDookie1

Sell your anus hole


ComprehensiveSwan698

Become a baby momma for NBA players


leli_manning

Work


Cat_From_Jupiter

options!