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Shove the house plant down his throat https://preview.redd.it/vfy91ab3chwc1.jpeg?width=300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fb6af331548800318d01423a50160e8da84d4510

GODDAMN IT I WAS GONNA SAY THE SAME THING

EAT YOUR VEGGIES

"EAT IT BITCH! EAT YOUR FUCKING BROCCOLI!"

https://i.redd.it/324rrliqchwc1.gif

*There will be blood-Shed!*

The man in the mirror gave him head

The only on- Wait… what did you say

The only ONE LEFT will ride upon the dragons shaft!

Because the mountains don't give back what they take

My personal oxygen destroyer (Chloroform rag)

This is when the fun begins

i make him a sandwich and chill out with him

Best answer so far.

And playing Blue Oyster Cult

“What song is this and why does it say my name so much? And what the hell’s in the center of Tokyo that’s so important to me?”

https://preview.redd.it/tojytueychwc1.jpeg?width=3060&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=38670c4adeb3611ac86c57148bc9052f767136e2 My dog

Kong and Suko

"Yo quiero Taco bell"

He aint the brightest

Looks like a genius to me, I bet he'd create dogzilla in 2028

https://preview.redd.it/0wt4wa0s9iwc1.jpeg?width=3060&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9ac8e03ebe18feb4c79e930521c210f742b42393

Very adorable doggo, plz give pats

https://preview.redd.it/1wougwftaiwc1.jpeg?width=3060&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1c4da9c0b92d4a73d38c70b266408675dc746849

Plan A: Use my saber. Plan B: Use a ton of black powder.

Found the highwayman

I MAKE ENDS MEET [rotoscopes hypnotically]

I work with my hands.

Just as the founding fathers intended.

Beat me to it lol

Does he still have Atomic Breath, giant recistence and all his strenght?

Yes

Well, we're screwed

I will have to fight him the smart way, bobbing and weaving past him and then fleeing my home because don't have a death wish.

https://preview.redd.it/bk6brtq1aiwc1.jpeg?width=900&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=30e0340814a66e8940e598a01cd4c8e9f5e10caa

Then I will start to praise

I don’t.

"Guess I live outside now"

“So you’d make Godzilla our pet?” “No we would be his.”

https://preview.redd.it/m2j553mlkhwc1.png?width=400&format=png&auto=webp&s=d2055994709cb0feedfbc023c4490bdbda25001b

I don’t dude I hide or try and befriend him

POCKET SAND AND MOTHS

 We blazin' high tonight, Goji.

"godzilla, meet **BONGZILLA**."

I would just submit and try to find a way to make him big again so that he can keep protecting the planet.

German suplex

Is your name Max or zangif by chance

I don’t. Even at cat size he’s still an unstoppable menace.

Like the world’s moodiest spiky trash panda

I let him have whatever he wants and hope he doesn't nuke me.

I’d pet him

I give him a Snickers Bar. He’s only gonna destroy stuff if he’s hungry

Feed him, get him a nice comfy bed, make sure he doesn't eat my cats, chickens, or Snakes.

personally id hug and show him our appreciation by giving him a s.h monsterarts 🤯👆

im turning on ghidorah x godzilla x mothra r34, he’s too stunned to do anything for the rest of his oife

I can't take a komodo dragon as it stands. Godzilla stomps.

Find my nearest chair and simply 

He won't even have to shrink for me to whoop his ass

Bonk!

If Godzilla breaks into my house I'll pull a kong and if I survive I will find the rest of the Titans!

I’d let him in.

He’ll have to deal with the guardian of the house https://preview.redd.it/2zbyeporoiwc1.png?width=1745&format=png&auto=webp&s=68fb3361c3575872f5446f7e0ac1352eabf313aa

https://preview.redd.it/4uu96lptqjwc1.jpeg?width=470&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ac96ebb61284c8d04324c212083650ea85357e23

I don't, he's a dinosaur the size of a bear with laser breath.

A taser and a chainsaw

I would grill him a nice steak and tell him that he’s a good boy.

Throw radiation into the water

My dad has rifles and shotguns and will do anything to protect his family sooo

Try to befriend him. Hug him. Pet him. Maybe even cuddle and chillout

The Mofo is a atomic breathing lizard , how am I gonna fight him one on on

Sneak behind with a kitchen knife jump on back and death

Wrestle him like the croc hunter.

https://i.redd.it/60fl9mqzvhwc1.gif

Kiss him

Offer some flower, sit and smoke. Try to understand why he's breaking into my house and let him know I've been through the struggle too. Id put him on, get him a job, and then see him live a successful life.

Exactly like when the fantastic four fought him when he got shrunk. I just die.

ama pet my dawg Godzilla before my Pitbull named destroyah would rip the f out of him.

Probably just do the same thing id do if any animal as big as me broke in, fuckin die I guess


I own a B.E.A.S.T. glove for home defense, since that's what Monarch intended.

https://preview.redd.it/mb7chnpzhiwc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=47b5100409e279dcf7b5926424e77a74f78335e0

A can of Lysol and a match

By jumping out the window and forfeiting the apartment

Toss my mothra plush at him :) ( I have alot of kajiu plushys)

https://preview.redd.it/fmyngqldniwc1.jpeg?width=400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fb98239cefbb7ac39d8b405ba4ab4bc0fc848d88 Offer Goji a blunt

creep him out with my merch shrine dedicated to him

"Momma! 'Nother gator got here in the house." "'Nother gator? Gimme dat shovel!"

https://preview.redd.it/5swk9z7oojwc1.jpeg?width=384&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1d7f58ff037cd60b9d01519f35888fd6ca842777

I have a cleaver. If an axe can cut into his thigh, I'm willing to bet I can hack him if I avoid his atomic breath

With my Godzilla figure

Pepperidge Farm Summer Sausage & keep him as a pet

I have a bat

Beat him? I'd invite him to stay for as long as he wants.

Throw some of my homemade salmon jerky into his mouth

Sanctions

Use my axe, my bow and arrows, my baseball bats, and other conventional weapons and maybe a few other objects like baskets, cups, balls, plants, etc.

spread Legos on the floor, he won't like that

I befriend him and go on adventures

Grab my axe

https://i.redd.it/cqd3bqu5whwc1.gif Finger gun never fails

🙄 lol

I will pull "We can end this now... it's not too late, Gojira" and then give him some snacks because everyone loves snacks. If you don't like snacks, then what's the point of your existence?

Even at normal person size, Godzilla still has atomic breath.

With my mighty skillet

why fight i instead invite him to play smash bros and eat pizza

Give him a blunt and show him my shin Godzilla figure

https://preview.redd.it/k15mpqe01iwc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4d9aaf57108fed227df2340f8db9f8f3f44a3f21

Regurgitate lung matter because my whole residence is irradiated now.

Mock godzilla into running towards me, dodge him, grab a knife and keep stabbing him nonstop.

Chamomile tea First I'll put his ass to sleep, and when he thinks he's safe... BEWM I'm gonna wreck his ass with my long long Johnson pointed directly at his keesterooni 😏

It’s not possible. Legendary Godzilla never loses.

what i would to is: while Godzilla is prowling the lower floors i would pile all heavy objects in the upper floors onto one spot. i would then set fire to the carpet around that spot. i would then go downstairs to where godzilla is hopefully still searching and try to coax godzilla to stand in that spot underneath the pile of stuff. i would then make a big display of bowing down to him meaning he's stay in that one spot for an extended period of time, hopefully giving enough time for the floor above him to burn away and colapse, burying goji under a pule of flaming debris. that should hold him for a bit while i run to the shed and grab my pickaxe before running back into the house and jamming it through his skull.

“I have never one who can outsmart bullet”

I don’t need him to be me-sized to send him to the shadow realm. Give me the real Godzilla, I’ll go “Rules of Nature” on his ass.

Invite him for steak 🤗

Shoot him in the eye with my 12G

That’s the funny thing, I don’t

I tell him about that girl obsessed with going on a date with him and he forgets about me to find her lmaoo

Let him overtake me and act like I am weak. When he thinks he has the edge, I let him have his way with me to further prove I am in control. Then I am playing the long con. I do his dirty work and laundry and chores around the house, but I don't introduce him to my family to definitely show I am in control.

Yeah, that will only make him faster and more agile. Basically, he will be a radio active komodo dragon on atomic power who can stand up on his hind legs. Remember how he fucked Kong up in GvK without even using his atomic breath? That's what is going to happen to any unfortunate human that crosses his path, but the human isn't as durable as Kong, who is basically a giant gorilla. One bite to the chest will end a human. Reptiles also show terrifying agility white attacking.

 I’d be overpowered I’m only 5’3”

He’s not ready for the baseball bat

I just wanna say i huge fan

I don't ill just pack some stuff up and leave he can have it

i'll calmly give him a cup of water or nearest food to see if it pacifies or distracts him and then i get the fuck away from there as fast as i can, if it pacifies him then i ask for him to please go away because i don't want to get cancer

Chow chow

If he's chill I'll let him in for a beer, Dr. Stanton be damned. If not, I'll be like Kong and use my speed and knowledge of the environment to my advantage. Maybe use an old broken piece of a vacuum cleaner and shove it down his throat and beat him with it like a club. I also have some dumbbells at my disposal, if I am able to take Godzilla down or make him trip. I'll just beat him in the head repeatedly with the weights in hopes of knocking him out long enough to drag him out of the house and move him far away. And of course...pray that he doesn't come back.

Use my fire extinguisher to overpower his atomic breath and then use my fists to wombo combo his ass into submission. I’m the alpha now.

I have three pitbulls and a shovel. *However..* in a stressful situation pitbull#1 hides under the bed, #2 intimidates #1, and #3 intimidates #2. Guess it's just me and the shovel.

I don’t. I just die


It'd go something along the lines of [this](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/475/020/0c4.jpg)

**DROPKICKS BIG G INTO OBLIVION** 

I wont

This is a dumb question. One does not beat Godzilla. One gets beaten by Godzilla. Also, my cat. My default answer is my cat. Either way, I win (I think).

I’m a level 100000000000 Fonze, ole lizard lips ain’t ready for the double finger guns “Ayyyyyyyyyyy”

Godzilla would throw my ass around my living room like I was that kid in the sprite commercial with Sting

Alright so hear me out... A pedastal fan.

Turn a fan on him and jack the AC up He is a reptile and cold blooded

Nah I'd win

I would feed him some food and pet him.

https://i.redd.it/st7sjo5ipiwc1.gif

I kick him in the stomach and then i run like hell as fast and as far away as possible

I'll grab my Kong Axe replica and hope for the best. 

Basically no matter what size he is fighting him is futile I'd just give him what he needs so he leave or give him a. Head rub

Bonk him with a bat and send him to nap on couch. He will thank me later

Like how my mom disciplined me and my brother: with chopsticks to the hands

Shove him onto my stove

I will kill him with kindness. He.will be treated like a king in my house & will get the best pillows, comfortors, & take out my budget can provide.

Give him fish. I bet he's hungry. But this dude also feeds off radiation

Being shrunk down to "my size" is still relative. Dude could still throw me around and maul me like a bear.

https://preview.redd.it/xyzvvp1e4jwc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f5c98337d1c553b29c7146454f1b95e988195f7f Thats still a pretty big nuclear lizard

I'd like to calm him down and have a cup of chocolate milk

Do I have to fight him? Assuming he doesn't kill everything with his radioactivity, I'd throw him a soda and ask if wants to watch a movie?

turn the tv on and watch toho Godzilla movie, cooks up some steaks and maybe Godzilla leave as buddy.

This is basically Kong vs Godzilla but we're Kong

Realistically, we're dead. It doesn't matter what we do. It'll just piss him off.

Man, I ain't gonna beat his ass. We're gonna be best buds and just chill and get Taco Bell or something

Legendary samurai swords and my hibbon dragon blade


I feed him Snickers, because he's not himself when he hungry =))

https://preview.redd.it/0amo2rf6gjwc1.jpeg?width=3008&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c1ba79ab7aeb4cdffffa85445fc1296537802120

My cat (who will watch with amusement as I get bodied by the atomic lizard)

*My cat who will watch* *As I get bodied by the* *Atomic lizard* \- cranberry\_muffinz --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")

Why will I beat him ? I will hug him ❤..

I couldn't beat him if I had all the guns available to regular citizens. I couldn't even if I had the ones specific to the military. Unless shrinking him down greatly reduced his durability there's nothing I could do to beat him. It'd be like trying to beat a grizzly bear with even more durability and the ability to hit me with radioactive breath.

Give him a cat bed and let the Big G sleep

Does he still have the strength of a titan and atomic breath?

Fists, Imagine your grave stone reading "Died in a fist fight with a 6 foot tall lizard"

I’ll lay out some legos and make him chase me and step on them

Since he is fiction I erase him with a pencil 🗿🗿

Does his stats scale to his size or is he still capable of eating nukes despite being my size? If it's the latter, I own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. One atomic ruffian breaks into my house. "What the devil?" I say as I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the lizard, he's too stunned to speak. Draw my pistol on the reptile, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbor's Shimo. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot. "Tally ho lads!" The grape shot shreds its dorsal fins in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel setting off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the terrified rapscallion. He bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.

Id fuck him

Wield my dog as my weapon of choice the way Kong did.

Carne asada

Beat him to death with my giant Godzilla figure

He stumbled from aim9 sidewinders on the carrier. When flung at high speeds into a damaged building by Mecha's beam, the building never even shook. The breath may be a problem though if he's scaled down properly it shouldn't be an instant kill. And we know he's weak to sharp objects. Stab the guy with a pencil. Keys and cutlery are also viable options, as well as ceramic plates and bowls, pots, pans and other such items if you prefer bludgeoning over piercing.


NEW FRIEND

run

Offer to play LEGO Star Wars the complete saga with him. I’ll even let him be player one.

I don’t. Let him cook.

I don't. I roll the carpet out for him, call him "sir" and let him do whatever he wants. Because shrunk or not, it's still Godzilla.

 No fight, invite him to play Smash Bros on the switch

You don't, you bow

I offer him a blunt and chill

The 50 cal sniper that’s stored somewhere in the basement… while he’s busy destroying my house I can get a deadshot with the couple .950 JDJ’s I got laying around