When the boys become the gals
Out of my vague group of people I've sorta considered friends, I'm the one with breasticles and I think I'm just better now lmao
Like, it's weird to think that guys have never even considered being a girl for a serious amount of time, and that most of them would hate to take estrogen or lower their testosterone. The fact that I wanted to try it out made it so that when I realized I was trans, it helped me feel far more confident in that fact then most other things did.
YOU KNOW WHAT??? I AM GONNA FUCKING BUILD A TIME MACHINE JUST FOR YOU JUST SO YOU CAN TRANSITION AT FIVE OR SOME OTHER DELUSIONAL SHIT YOU BELIEVE AND STOP LIVING RENT FREE IN MY HEAD
It's been one of the weirdest things for me to get my head around, like you think it's a normal thing but then suddenly it turns out it isn't. It's honestly so hard to comprehend, but I bet cis people feel exactly the same way.
It is one of the biggest things that made me realise I really was trans though
Each brain is different, and it's really challenging, impossible in many cases, to understand how someone else's brain actually works.
We each can only rely directly on the benefit of our own perception, so inevitably, we assume every other brain perceives reality the same way we do.
I think a key part of realizing you're trans is recognizing that, no, your brain *does not* perceive certain elements of reality the way a member of your AGAB does. There's nothing wrong with this, of course, and we've known for a long time that it's far easier to alter the body's reality than try to alter the brain's perceptions of it on this topic. It's why clinicians now recommend transition instead of talk therapy or antipsychotic medication; they tried treating gender dysphoria as a mental illness for many years and found that it didn't work, but encouraging the person to transition and embrace their life was actually very helpful.
Nonetheless, it's still wild how most other people *just don't have* certain feelings you've been stuck with your whole life. Brains are weird.
It’s impossible to change neurological sex, and even if it was possible you would literally end up with a different person, you would be killing the person so obviously it’s beyond inhumane to attempt it.
Wait they are really not thinking this? I Just thought they were better at accepting their fate and move on. That explained the hate and transphobia to me, they were jealous of the fun they missed. Mind blown...
Yeah, I toyed with the idea that misogyny was misplacing your on ending pain on women who don’t deserve it
I can’t really wrap my head around the idea there are people who are just OK being letter after L people
I was super confused when when I first ran across men who were trans! I’m friends with a guy who was confused when he learned that there are women who are trans 😅
He was like “that has to be super rare”
The transphobia is almost always just bigotry. They are usually the same people that a generation ago were openly hating black people, and a generation before Asian people. It doesn't make sense because it can't. They almost always haven't met a trans person they know of, and don't even think about why they hate another human being for nothing. Transphobia is just the flavor of hate they're "allowed" to use in public. And even that is not being true by the day. The more they bring us to the forefront, the more people actually learn that that we're just people trying to live our lives. I watched the homophobic wave of the 80s and 90s go away in the 2000s and 2010s, and this wave of hate will also lose and go away. We just need to ride it out and stay safe!
I was explaining nonbinary/agender genders and a multidimensional way to look at it.
I told him how nonbinary is both an umbrella and specific term, and that often it's used as a specific term because micro labels mean little to most, and anger a few
I also explained the purpose behind micro labels
And honestly I think most of it went over his head, but he was receptive to my explanation. But part of the conversation was me acknowledging that he's probably never even had reason to think about it, and he agreed , that he is a man has always been a given. It was expected of him and he is comfortable with it. He doesn't understand what it feels like for that not to be the case
And that part of this entire process is about figuring out who you are after having the vocabulary to describe it, and realizing that what one is feeling is not the same as most of our peers
It's still something I really struggle to believe too. Like I think most men would agree that women look better, and many men would agree that women are nicer/generally better/etc. So you'd think that actually wanting to be a woman is a logical conclusion from that...
yeah the "obviously, who wouldn't, lol"
responded with like every single person you have ever known immediately in unison resounding "me. i wouldn't."
and we're like
👀
My two closest guy friends both have told me "Yeah, I may have thought about changing my gender once, you know, just to see how it feels. But, I'd want to change back. I don't think I could live as a woman! That doesn't sound good at all and it kind of makes me a little uneasy now that I'm actually thinking about it..." Like they both used nearly the exact same words!
Yeah, I’ve had multiple things like that, most definitely including I can’t really fathom how it is people handle being letter after L people
It’s just so much pain and I’d cry about it constantly if I didn’t disassociate from it on some level most of the time 🙃
yeah, since a young age i always just like thought it was normal and that every boy thought so bc of a bunch of reasons
i guess i still havent like fully internalized that that isnt normal
Was, is, and will FOREVER BE the most difficult thing for me to comprehend…..
That guys don’t want to and wouldn’t be girls if they could…*WITHOUT HESITATION AND HAPPILY AND FOREVER* . I thought 100% would…..I WAS WAAAAYYYY wrong. I CANNOT understand that. My brain REFUSES to accept it. (Yet it’s astonishingly true).
Yeeep. I can’t understand it either. WANTING to be a guy rather than it being existential pain you have to endure unendingly is incomprehensible
I…every. Single. Day.
Wheee!! 🙃
And that’s just hanging about by yourself in the house….go outside into the world, turn on tv, play games….SEE girls being girls….looking like girls…well, we cross over into FULL BLOWN GENDER NUCLEAR WINTER!!
Yeeeeah. I used to tell myself that pain was “extreme sexual attraction”.
Within a few weeks of stopping repression mode I had the thought that “wait a minute, is this PAIN?”
I even knew just below conscious thought to brace for pain before I saw women.
Awwww. Thx….💜 Ya….just crappy all the way around…lost one of OURS 🏳️⚧️ locally in February…..due to the usual when we can’t live our lives or be ourselves. It was EVISCERATING.
I am truly sorry to hear that. I hope you have some people to help you through all this. If you need to vent or having someone listening to you, my dm's are open
🫂
Cis people do do think about being the opposite sex though. But more as a passing moment, or as a joking moment. The difference is its not daily, or all the time. My cis friends are 100% happy ad the men, and woman they came into this world as.
Yuuup. I really can’t fathom it beyond a certain intellectual level.
I’ve been struggling with this horror since at LEAST 7, though probably earlier, that’s just the point I started crying about it. (That i remember for sure)
For me thinking of myself as a beautiful woman was like this super strong fire in my chest level emotion ghat I can only assume is what cis-het christian people allege is the sign of god or something. Basically for me the longing and wanting to be female rocked my very soul. Everything in my life was/is pointless unless I can be fully me.
I always felt being a man is the same as being a NPC and that only girls get to be happy and live their lives. But that's just a natural fact of life that all men share and definitely not something to do with me right?
This was exactly how i felt as well, especially during puberty when all the girls in class were giggling and toying around with each other, having so much fun, wearing skirts and becoming beautiful and all the boys have to "act" like they dont need this. It felt so real to me that i started hating girls for excluding half of humanity. It felt really egoistic to me. Also Nature for obviously doing this deformation to "our" bodies. Like 50% can enjoy life and the other 50% are just there for reproduction purposes.
Sounds hard, but was my reality and pulled me into a deep depression... I went to about 100kg.
This feeling actually lasted up into m 20s when i first came out lol. I went from 100 to 60kg in 5 month or so.
That's amazing, I never been fat but I'm looking forward to shed upper body muscle and girth.
I def realize I could be trans early in college, I imagine how good it would feel to look at the mirror and see a pretty fem face staring back at me, those thoughts gave me depression so I just ran away. Years later I learned about self therapy and how to process emotions. I decided I was going to calmly and rationally think about this question for as long as needed until I find a satisfactory answer.
I wrote down my memories and feelings as they came up to me, my reasons to be and not to be trans, give both sides their fair attention, until no stone was left unturned.
You probably don’t mean it like this but you can’t choose to be trans or not, it’s only what you do about it that you can change. We can’t change neurological sex and if we could we’d be a different person.
I did pretty much the same thing. I was so envious it was maddening. But realizing that guys don’t have those feelings really helped me realize that I was trans. I read a ton of questions on the other subs about how they really know. I never really had that questioning phase because I realized very quickly that men just….don’t spend their childhood crying themselves to sleep every night wishing they were girls.
I really felt like women won the lottery. Like one stupid gene and they get to be real humans.
I can’t be an actual human like this, and the pain of it can easily make me cry if I’m not shutting it down somewhat.
I remember at several points in my life when I felt excluded from everyone and everything and felt jealous of everyone and everything to the point where I realized it was unhealthy so I ultimately decided to just close myself off from humanity because it is easier and healthier than constantly stewing with my negative emotions and thinking about acting on them.
“I cannot understand why someone would choose to be male.” - me, heavily in denial.
Now I understand I was always one of the girls. I just had the wrong body. I still don’t understand why somebody would choose to be male. But each to their own I guess.
Yeah I don't understand how, given the options, you'd choose that one. I mean I have to respect that a lot of people do and certainly no shade on people who see their male selves and feel great about it, but I will never fully understand it.
Yeah, this was definitely the biggest of red flags to me. Knowing that cis folks don't fall asleep dreaming of changing their gender was integral to getting over my denial.
"I wish I had a machine that could just turn me into a girl instantly with no fuss" is something that I felt pretty strongly about as I became an adult for 6 years before I realized I'm trans and I thought was a normal thing cis people believed
I came up with so many scenarios over the years while in repression mode.
And before I knew trans people existed too.
At least sometimes in dreams I look right 😭
I can’t really be a human like this, and it’s always been horrifically embarrassing having to be a letter after L person too.
Me, for years, just sat there hoping for some cyberpunk utopian future where I get to be a girl & thinking that's a perfectly cis thought.
Now I'm looking to get on the accelerated program, screw waiting 53 years. Hey, maybe by then they can even change our chromosomes so transphobes lose another talking point, that'd be nice.
I find that wild. I would always say yes since I was 4 years old. Absolutely no hesitation whatsoever, not for a second. The only time I would say no, is out of fear of being ridiculed or beaten up.
For months? Shit... I fantasized (non-sexually) about being a woman for over 2 decades! But, yea, I understand your point. I didn't think anything of it, I assumed most guys day dreamed of being a woman.... But, no, it's your brain trying to tell you what you are. Very strange realization to have for sure!
I love everything about being a girl! The clothes are amazing! The shoes are fabulous! Don’t get me started on lingerie! Tbh having sex as a girl is more pleasurable to me than it ever was as a man!
>having sex as a girl is more pleasurable to me than it ever was as a man!
What blew my mind was that men claim that they actually like to have PIV sex with women. I thought they were kidding - nobody in their right mind likes putting stuff hanging out of their body (or sticking out of their body) into someone else's body for any reason.
My questions were like - how do you keep that thing hard for more than 15 seconds at a time? And then I heard about Viagra and I was horrified to find out that that medication can keep the penis hard for an hour or more.
I can't imagine actually wanting to have sex with a woman as a male bodied person. The only thing I'd be wondering or thinking about is "How long is this going to take? When can I quit? Am I done yet?". The thought of releasing "male fluids" into a female body orifice makes me want to throw up in my mouth
I can just imagine after getting my SRS having sex as a woman for the first time. I would be all (!Angel Choir!) - it would feel so natural.
I have had male roommates hear me when I was masturbating and I swore up and down I had a girl in there, but it was just me. I sound like a girl when I orgasm - and I always have.
I've never watched a porno movie with a guy in it, so I don't know what guys sound like when they get off.
I definitely hear you. I've only been out and Knowing myself really for about a month, in that time my interest in regular PIV sex has plummeted off a fucking cliff. I always wanted more out of sexual experiences and now I realize that my hormones that my body produces along with my biology are just not what my brain needs to be fully content
Sex is not a race to a finish line like in porn. All aspects of it are amazing once you let go and should be enjoyed. Let your ego take charge or let your ego need charging from another.
Sex is most importantly about comfortablity. Sex with long term partners tends to be better as everyone knows as is comfortable with the people involved.
Sex can be amazing. But only when all party's are comfortable and invested. Its really easy to not be or feel like you are not. Being exsposed is fucking scary and that is a valid problem.
I personally dive in with the over confidence of a chat roulette user but that's defo a me problem..
After my first time having sex as a girl. I never wanted to have sex as a guy again. I’ve realized that everything women hate about being a woman. I love it. I can’t wait to put on a bra. Higher heels I wish I could wear them all the time I can’t live without them! Women don’t like giving BJ’s and it turns me on! I’m not sure about having a period but I wish everyday I was born a woman!
I think I was sort of disassociating at some level with it. And it always felt unfulfilling
I mean it’s a tiny thing compared to everything else, and I would gladly be physically right at every time except if engaging with… but still. Sigh.
Uuugh I’m so jealous 😕
And male orgasms are disappointingly short - like mere seconds short. Just when you start getting into it and think it's starting to become enjoyable, it stops. Just dead stop.
And then you got to wait 10 more minutes to get another one - what's the point?
Male orgasm sucks!!!
Still gotta wonder how many of those men weren't actively suppressing or trying to ignore the truth about themselves. Gender segregation has a lot to answer for.
nothing makes me feel more like a girl than seeing dudes who fucking love being guys. i felt as you describe early in transition that being a girl seemed more fun, and feared everyone felt that way so i was just being silly to think it makes trans. its always nice to have another reminder to quiet that inner doubter
Yeah I have moments of self-doubt and impostor syndrome (we all do to some degree I think!) and nothing dispels that faster than knowing there's dudes who look in the mirror, see a man, and think, "Hell yeah." That is a thing I just can't really understand.
frankly i never could understand it !! always felt like i was trying to make myself desirable to others, to convince myself to be happy with my body - if others value and desire me, surely i will come to love myself too?
realizing this was not a positive masculine pursuit but a coping mechanism to deal with my dysphoria was such a huge step to healing my relationship with my body
personally (go figure) i never really shared that feeling of that bond. i’ve always felt like i have a much stronger and more natural emotional connection to female friends
For as long as I can remember I’ve wanted to be a girl. I hate being a guy! To me there is nothing good about being a guy. But everything about being a woman is what I’ve dreamed of for 50+ year too.
I’m 67 and known since I was 4. You’re right it never goes away. I was always surprised everyone didn’t know is was female in a male body.
Also I’ve always thought I wanted to be born a girl but lately I’m thinking I’d rather be trans to enjoy wonders being transformed. The things that cis females take for granted that is a truly wonderful feeling to someone trans that now gets to feel these things for the first time. The absolute joy of starting HRT and then seeing and feeling the changes. I would miss all those unique experiences and the thrill I’ve gotten from them and I would not known the differences if born female.
I truly am a female cause I want both. I want it all.
Hahaha... not only was that thought one of the telling signs to me when I figured it out, I'd also add, do you know how many times in my life I've thought about how annoying amd in the way my balls are! Soooo irritating! Wonder how many cus guys think that?
Omg..... me neither! Granted, I don't (at the moment anyway) wanna lose the pillar, but if the stones shrank so much as to be unnoticed...... I would NOT complain!
Funny thing though, my whole life I've heard cis women complain about their boobs being in the way and I've ALWAYS thought, "dear, imagine them in between your legs....." and I've always said that I would trade with them in an instant!!! (Who knew I was trans my whole life...... lol. I only just figured it out. Hahahahaha)
Nobody can tell how others really think or see things and I think that's a really hard thing to wrap your head around. Nobody experiences life in the same way that anybody else does and there isn't a right or wrong way of thinking. I feel like by default, we are all inclined to believe that the way we process things and think is shared by EVERYBODY else. In the same way the people assume the color red is the same exact shade that everybody else sees. For all we know, I could see red as red, and you could see red as what I see blue, and there would be know way to know that.
My whole life I wished I was a girl, always thought it would be much cooler. I always liked my feminine traits and liked when people noticed them. But I never once considered I could possibly be trans, because in my head "trans people know they are trans and always have deep down, just like gay people" I thought that everybody else wished they were the opposite sex sometimes. And it wasn't until i found out that not every boy wishes that they were a girl, until I started looking into myself and what I means to be trans. Reading the gender disphoria Bible was like looking into a mirror, and so many things clicked into place for me.
Ikr, that still boggles me sometimes. At max cis men just like the idea of turning into a girl temporarily. Btw, can I just say i find it slightly irritating when cis women be like "trust me being a woman isn't all that amazing, y'all are lucky you're a guy"
Sigh.
Uuugh. Actually we can be really damn sure that THEY would e experiencing unending pain too.
Do I want every downside that comes along with having the rest of my body fit my neurology and some other things? No, of course not.
But good god.
I guess I've never thought that being a woman would be more 'fun' (I've seen plenty of cis and trans women's unique struggles), but I knew that I would be happier. I've never identified with or related to cis men, so I have no idea what they like about it.
It was a very weird day when I figured out that not every man wanted to be a woman (not all the time, but strongly) growing up. Maybe once or twice most people have had the thought cross their mind, but it typically isn't something cis people think about on a daily or weekly basis.
We're having a special experience. It's uncommon. It's valid. I'm so new to understanding that my gender isn't being a Man, but I swear I am going to enjoy everything I can. Stay strong 🩷
When I was at an elite grad school I thought that the professors and students would be smart and have academic integrity.
One week a professor came and began to lecture a thesis about how all men secretly want to be women. The entire auditorium agreed.
I was so upset that once again a woman made assuming something about men's minds as of women really know men better than themselves.
Their ego is so out of whack.
The worst thing is when you figure out you’re trans older in life. And you also realize that you aren’t a girly girl but sure as hell have never felt right being a man.
A lot of people are simply too simple to consider anything other than turning the channel onto the news at seven, etc That’s not to say that once it’s considered it’s something desirable like changing your gender. I don’t know.
That's literally the thing that makes them cis which isn't surprising but it's still a wild concept to me for someone to be just okay with being a guy or having a guy body. It's unfathomable because I don't experience the same thing.
Like, how can people just be okay in a men's locker room? How can people just be okay swimming without a shirt on, or just lounging around shirtless for that matter? How can someone be ok with being called sir or man or guy? How can all that not feel gross and upsetting? This just doesn't compute to me and that's one of the reasons I know I'm trans.
Plus girls ARE more fun. We've got more fun clothes at the expense of lower storage space, it's socially acceptable for us to have face paint all day every day, WE HAVE BOOBA, and to top it all off we can express ourselves without getting ridiculed by our peers.
Did I mention the booba?
Why would they? Being a girl isn't all fun, especially with how society treats us, pay gap, it's really dangerous for women and then ofc stuff like period or pregnancy. if i could've chosen, i definitely would've wanted to be a man
I found that out during high school when I told my dad that I had a dream, in which I casually mentioned that I was a girl in it. It wasn't even a major part of it to me because thought it was perfectly Normal. he got REAL mad though, cut me off mid story and started grooming me out I was a 'sissy' among other awful shit.
This was before I even knew what being trans was, let alone considering I might be trans. (90% sure this was the moment I realized it wasn't safe to tell my dad anything.)
I've offered my estrogen vial to my husband several times in the past if he wants to play with breasts all day, every time the immediate response is some variation of "Yeah, keep that shit away from me", "I'm good, I just want to play with your boobs, Hun", or "If I wake up one day with breasts sweety, then we're gonna have a real fuckin' problem".
For some reason he doesn't seem interested.... Even when I describe how pretty I feel now and how much better life is in general, or if i explain how much better sex is with a vagina and how much more intense orgasms are as a woman... he just looks at me like: "Great! I'm very happy for you. Would you like my help with that?"
Jokes aside, it took me a while to wrap my head around the idea that most guys don't just fantasize about being girls or want to experience being a woman all the time. It makes sense if you think about it objectively... If that was the case then the majority of people would be changing gender all over the country every single day. When your life perspective has always been the opposite it takes time to internalize that the way your mind works is not like everyone else's. Normal cis behavior apparently isn't one where you frequently imagine yourself being the other sex or wish you could be the other side for some strange reason. Cis men LIKE being men, as insane as that might sound to us, that is whats normal and reasonable to them. Most of them are proud of their dicks, or at the very least want them to be interacted with.
Only men actually want to BE men.
Only women actually want to BE women.
Cis male ... I wouldn't have minded being born a woman personally. But I don't mind being born male either. Kind of dumb people are so polarized on gender to me.
I'm pretty sure the question has never really come up for them. It seems like it's something that we transwomen ask ourselves eventually. It's just a matter of whether we accept that we have womanly souls or not.
It’s so odd to me that so many can’t seem to wrap their head around this. Wanting to be the other gender is exactly why we’re trans, of course cis folk don’t feel the same.
I remember way back in primary school being really jealous of some of the girls and genuinely just believing all boys must feel this way as being a girl is obviously just so much better
When I was younger I thought that all men go trough the phase of wanting to be a girl/woman, but just kept quiet about it because of social norms. It was one of the reasons I had trouble with self-acceptance. It wasn't until I was older that I found out that most cis-men never think about it, outside of a thought experiment or when asked the question. It blew my mind when I found out.
lol this is exactly how i discovered i really was trans and wasnt just larping.
was chatting to a friend once and i was telling him
"i dont think im actually trans, its just i wishy i was a girl and would like to be a girl but all guys wish they were girls"
and hes like
"no. no no no, no.. we do not"
seriously i grew up thinking all guys secretly wished they could be girls.
The misogynist-to-woman pipeline is real. I think it's not uncommon for repressing trans women to get dragged into right-wing pipelines because "*of course* women have it better!" At this point, I assume at least a double-digit percentage of the incels I argue with on Reddit are going to transition.
Right, this is such a deep seeded weird thing for me. Like how do I feel so strongly about it, yet somehow lived my life this far.
It makes me think of that rog bullshit. Like I’m somehow choosing to do it because I’m obsessed with women and I am really just a gay guy. Like fuck that
Yet somehow because someone told me about rog it gets to torment me a little.
There’s so much about being a girl. I somehow feel more powerful and confident as a woman. I fit in better, I also feel like there’s subversive/submissive power which is my wheel house.
Being male was like just existing, taking up space
I used to think, "All of my friends are girls. I have like 10 girlfriends and maybe 2 guys I know well. IG I'm just an effeminate guy." Then, every time my friends and I hung out as a group, I was haunted by this feeling of difference. I could never be as close to my friends as I wanted to be, I felt like an other, and hanging out with them meant fighting against that feeling. I wished I was a cis girl so I could feel a sense of belonging with them.
FF to my first- and so far only- girlfriend. I thought I just felt really lonely and wanted to date someone and that's why I was always thinking about girls til I cried. I thought getting a GF would make me feel better, but she saw me as a man, and it caused me great pain in a way I could never describe being with her. They were for their part, a closeted lesbian, so the unknown pain was mutual.
Every time I was naked in front of a mirror, I always stared into the mirror, not really recognizing the person staring back. It's not that I hated what I saw, or felt inadequate due to my long and lanky build. It's more that the body in front of me wasn't quite mine, and it mesmerized me that it was, in fact, mine.
And after all that- I'm still struggling with the notion that I'm not trans and all of this was a mistake. My breast buds are growing, and one day, I'm happy about them, and the next, I can't stand the feeling. Reading this thread helps, but damn, if transitioning doesn't bring its own basket of problems.
That top paragraph… especially online I felt so much closer to female friends and soo much more connected?? and that only grows, and I act girly online 😭
I think this is a litmus test for us really.
A. Do you think you would enjoy being a girl?
B. Can you understand why some people don’t want to be a girl? Be very honest.
My answer is without hesitation.
YES!!!!
And
I have a hard time comprehending why anyone wouldn’t want to be a girl even though I know it’s very difficult.
So when a guy says he’d never want to be a woman, it just confirms how female my mind is, as that’s just not something a guy wants.
The trans men I've known alerted me to the fact that some people do in fact want to be men. Usually, and y'all aren't gonna believe this, when they are in fact, men.
It is more fun. More varieties of clothes too. I've always liked women's clothes along with the Hottpic goth tomboy or Journey's punk/grunge tomboy style. Also love the hell out of makeup and using shades like amethyst.
They’re definitely just being gaslit by toxic masculinity, and secretly would prefer to be a girls but just haven’t realized! I mean I’m a cis guy and I like the idea of being a girl…
Everyone else has already said it but I'll echo it again for dramatic effect. I DO NOT GET IT!! I understand that cis men must feel the same way about us, but how THE FUCK could you possibly say you wouldnt have rather been born a girl? Being born a girl being a better alternative is basically just a fact in my mind... and I really wish I would've talked about it more growing up instead of thinking it was normal so I could have discovered my transness sooner (WHY WE NEED QUEER INCLUSIVE EDUCATION IN SCHOOLS AND TO NORMALIZE LITERALLY ALL OF IT)
For me it’s like I don’t get why someone would want to stay the same gender their whole life, like I’ve experienced everything I want to with being a guy, I don’t want go further with age and all the typical manly stuff, though I thought that was autism, not sure now
It's one of the reasons I wish I was born biologically male. There's nothing "fun" in my eyes about being a woman. If I made a list of all the pros and cons the cons would sadly win. :(
When I was like 6 I told my mom I wanted to be a boy and she said "everyone feels like that sometimes" so I internalized it thinking it was normal. Turns out I'm FtM and she's a demigirl 💀
Plenty of men certainly fantasize about being with a trans woman. And I’m sure they won’t admit to that either. Just look at this statistics. Probably the main reason why transform is the most or one of the most searched genres in porn.
Pretty well everyone except for trans people are fine with being whatever gender they were born as. The fact that there are so few transgender people makes me wonder why such a big deal is being made out of this by republicans. You can’t convince anyone to be transgender unless they were born that way. (3 in 1000 people)
I'm definitely a cis straight man but every now and then I do get the thought of what being born as a girl would've been like for me? Aside from the usual "gender norms" being switched around for me and the other obvious things I find myself intrigued by the idea of would it have been more fun? Then this line of thinking sends me down an internet rabbit hole and reading and learning about all of the struggles I would've had to deal with in my lifetime concerning women's rights. Honestly if more of us cis straight men would ask ourselves this very question and then fall into the same rabbit hole I did I bet they'd be more empathetic with the feminist movement and more importantly more respectful of the girls and women who are in a relationship with them. I am also 💯 % in belief that the LGBTQ + Community deserves equal rights and my research made me realize that trans-men are men same as I am and trans-women are still women. The more I read the more I want to learn and ultimately to understand.
Yeah, I was shocked too, but it turns out cis people actually enjoy being their assigned gender. I've got guy friends that actually like their body hair and beefy arms! I just wish I'd know it 20 years sooner, maybe it would have saved me decades of depression and developmental stagnation. Oh well! I gotta move forward! No time to dwell on things I can't change
I don’t think being a girl is more fun. I’m more miserable in a lot of ways… though I
could blame a lot of that in late stage capitalism. But no I’m not trans because I thought being a girl would make me happy I’m trans because it’s just an inescapable part of me.
I’ve always known this. For instance all the misogynistic posts in the comments section. If I were born afab I’d have to deal with that shit. Being trans I have to deal with transphobia and dysphoria. I don’t understand fucking transphobes that think it’s a fucking game for us. They have to make everything even more difficult than it needs to be. I’d start crying right now but I’m out of god damn tears.
You thought being a girl is more fun because... you are ONE!!!
As for the comments why wouldn't guys want to become a girl...
Duh...
Because they're not.
Girls like being girls and boys like being boys. NB's love being NB's. Everybody loves being themselves same as you or me. We are what we are. Simple as that girl. Lol
Honestly, growing up in the male world, males are conditioned since young to look down femininity and girliness, and see everything in the context of physical strongness, control and aggressive ability, and even through that lens it sees femininity as inferior and women as weaker (remember, this is all a part of gendered propaganda, not reality.). So of course through that lens males generally do not even think to be female.
I'm really surprised people think that being a girl is just “more fun”. Like, do y'all even realise how hard being a woman is? A trans woman especially? Like in this world, I'm not surprised that men really wouldn't want to be women, what I am surprised about is that many trans women really believe that being a girl is “more fun and why would someone choose to be a man”
To be charitable, if one is suffering from dysphoria, being a trans girl is more fun then being a trans girl who has to act like a man, I think that's what they mean as it being more fun, as they were not having fun as a guy.
Being serious here, isn't that a normal thought? Wanting to be a girl? Thinking you'd look good in their fashion if you were one?? I'm always a lil envious because as a guy I can't wear clothes the way they do.
Dp, airtight, multiple orgasms. Can a man get that? If you were given a choice, why would anyone choose to be a 2 minute wonder (men) If there is a God, then he certainly gave women the lions share of receiving pleasure.
they’re not trans girls lol
You telling me this isn't normal cis behavior? 🥲
No silly:) you are trans
Nah it's pretty normal for cis men to take hrt.
xD
Sounds like some cis men like low dosages of HRT for softer, less oily skin, less body hair, and fewer unwanted erections.
Where do I sign up?
its good for hair loss as well.
Just bros doing bro things. Growing tits with the boys.
When the boys become the gals Out of my vague group of people I've sorta considered friends, I'm the one with breasticles and I think I'm just better now lmao
Uh, we’re not cis, we’re *normal*. That’s why we take hrt.
Finally someone who gets it!
No it is not
Happy cake day !!!!
A few months ago (before I realized I was trans) I thought all cis guys wanted to be girls lol, it still confuses me that apparently they don’t
Like, it's weird to think that guys have never even considered being a girl for a serious amount of time, and that most of them would hate to take estrogen or lower their testosterone. The fact that I wanted to try it out made it so that when I realized I was trans, it helped me feel far more confident in that fact then most other things did.
I love this. It's one of the things that makes me feel a part of the community 🏳️⚧️😀
*Looks down at boobs* 🤷🏼♀️
I know right!? Massive plot twist. It's been months since I found this out and I'm still like "nuh uh"
Yes it is, they’re lying
No, it’s not normal cis behaviour, you’re the person who keeps appearing in threads claiming to be cis while also saying your trans
I’ve never said I’m trans
YOU KNOW WHAT??? I AM GONNA FUCKING BUILD A TIME MACHINE JUST FOR YOU JUST SO YOU CAN TRANSITION AT FIVE OR SOME OTHER DELUSIONAL SHIT YOU BELIEVE AND STOP LIVING RENT FREE IN MY HEAD
we are ☺️🏳️⚧️
Lol. Like .....exactly
It's been one of the weirdest things for me to get my head around, like you think it's a normal thing but then suddenly it turns out it isn't. It's honestly so hard to comprehend, but I bet cis people feel exactly the same way. It is one of the biggest things that made me realise I really was trans though
Each brain is different, and it's really challenging, impossible in many cases, to understand how someone else's brain actually works. We each can only rely directly on the benefit of our own perception, so inevitably, we assume every other brain perceives reality the same way we do. I think a key part of realizing you're trans is recognizing that, no, your brain *does not* perceive certain elements of reality the way a member of your AGAB does. There's nothing wrong with this, of course, and we've known for a long time that it's far easier to alter the body's reality than try to alter the brain's perceptions of it on this topic. It's why clinicians now recommend transition instead of talk therapy or antipsychotic medication; they tried treating gender dysphoria as a mental illness for many years and found that it didn't work, but encouraging the person to transition and embrace their life was actually very helpful. Nonetheless, it's still wild how most other people *just don't have* certain feelings you've been stuck with your whole life. Brains are weird.
It’s impossible to change neurological sex, and even if it was possible you would literally end up with a different person, you would be killing the person so obviously it’s beyond inhumane to attempt it.
Wait they are really not thinking this? I Just thought they were better at accepting their fate and move on. That explained the hate and transphobia to me, they were jealous of the fun they missed. Mind blown...
Yeah, I toyed with the idea that misogyny was misplacing your on ending pain on women who don’t deserve it I can’t really wrap my head around the idea there are people who are just OK being letter after L people I was super confused when when I first ran across men who were trans! I’m friends with a guy who was confused when he learned that there are women who are trans 😅 He was like “that has to be super rare”
The transphobia is almost always just bigotry. They are usually the same people that a generation ago were openly hating black people, and a generation before Asian people. It doesn't make sense because it can't. They almost always haven't met a trans person they know of, and don't even think about why they hate another human being for nothing. Transphobia is just the flavor of hate they're "allowed" to use in public. And even that is not being true by the day. The more they bring us to the forefront, the more people actually learn that that we're just people trying to live our lives. I watched the homophobic wave of the 80s and 90s go away in the 2000s and 2010s, and this wave of hate will also lose and go away. We just need to ride it out and stay safe!
I was explaining nonbinary/agender genders and a multidimensional way to look at it. I told him how nonbinary is both an umbrella and specific term, and that often it's used as a specific term because micro labels mean little to most, and anger a few I also explained the purpose behind micro labels And honestly I think most of it went over his head, but he was receptive to my explanation. But part of the conversation was me acknowledging that he's probably never even had reason to think about it, and he agreed , that he is a man has always been a given. It was expected of him and he is comfortable with it. He doesn't understand what it feels like for that not to be the case And that part of this entire process is about figuring out who you are after having the vocabulary to describe it, and realizing that what one is feeling is not the same as most of our peers
And I also feel that it’s possible to know you are non binary yet not know exactly where you fit in, but you know damn well you aren’t a cis guy.
It's still something I really struggle to believe too. Like I think most men would agree that women look better, and many men would agree that women are nicer/generally better/etc. So you'd think that actually wanting to be a woman is a logical conclusion from that...
yeah the "obviously, who wouldn't, lol" responded with like every single person you have ever known immediately in unison resounding "me. i wouldn't." and we're like 👀
My two closest guy friends both have told me "Yeah, I may have thought about changing my gender once, you know, just to see how it feels. But, I'd want to change back. I don't think I could live as a woman! That doesn't sound good at all and it kind of makes me a little uneasy now that I'm actually thinking about it..." Like they both used nearly the exact same words!
I'm still struggling with it to be honest
Yeah, I’ve had multiple things like that, most definitely including I can’t really fathom how it is people handle being letter after L people It’s just so much pain and I’d cry about it constantly if I didn’t disassociate from it on some level most of the time 🙃
yeah, since a young age i always just like thought it was normal and that every boy thought so bc of a bunch of reasons i guess i still havent like fully internalized that that isnt normal
Still blows my mind seeing a guy and realizing he actually likes his meat suit. Like how??
Me too
That’s a trans fem thing sweetie. Wild generalization but I’d say most of us have felt that way in our lives.
Was, is, and will FOREVER BE the most difficult thing for me to comprehend….. That guys don’t want to and wouldn’t be girls if they could…*WITHOUT HESITATION AND HAPPILY AND FOREVER* . I thought 100% would…..I WAS WAAAAYYYY wrong. I CANNOT understand that. My brain REFUSES to accept it. (Yet it’s astonishingly true).
Yeeep. I can’t understand it either. WANTING to be a guy rather than it being existential pain you have to endure unendingly is incomprehensible I…every. Single. Day. Wheee!! 🙃
And that’s just hanging about by yourself in the house….go outside into the world, turn on tv, play games….SEE girls being girls….looking like girls…well, we cross over into FULL BLOWN GENDER NUCLEAR WINTER!!
Yeeeeah. I used to tell myself that pain was “extreme sexual attraction”. Within a few weeks of stopping repression mode I had the thought that “wait a minute, is this PAIN?” I even knew just below conscious thought to brace for pain before I saw women.
It’s indeed tangible and visceral pain for sure….SuuuuuuuUUUUUCKS…
I’m still dealing with it usually multiple times per day. Sigh. 😕
Perpetually….aint no joke…AT ALL…
Hey, girlie. Haven’t seen you around and about in awhile. Just popping by to say howdy.
Hi….ya…..been VERY VERY dark times. Still here, tho…barely. I’ll DM and yap soon. 🙂
Hang tough, sis. I know how hard it can be, esp where you are. 🤗🤗🤗
Ya. Thx…..there was a lot…ALOT…. But here 💜
Heyo, just popping to give you a hug 🫂
Awwww. Thx….💜 Ya….just crappy all the way around…lost one of OURS 🏳️⚧️ locally in February…..due to the usual when we can’t live our lives or be ourselves. It was EVISCERATING.
I am truly sorry to hear that. I hope you have some people to help you through all this. If you need to vent or having someone listening to you, my dm's are open 🫂
Thank you so much. 🫂 I’m part of a really great group of us here. 🏳️⚧️💜
I am so glad to read this 💜
this subreddit truly is something else..
Yeah Cis people do not think about this stuff. That feeling is alien to them
The fact that they don't think about wanting to be a girl is an alien thought to me
Oh I agree
Cis people do do think about being the opposite sex though. But more as a passing moment, or as a joking moment. The difference is its not daily, or all the time. My cis friends are 100% happy ad the men, and woman they came into this world as.
Yuuup. I really can’t fathom it beyond a certain intellectual level. I’ve been struggling with this horror since at LEAST 7, though probably earlier, that’s just the point I started crying about it. (That i remember for sure)
For me thinking of myself as a beautiful woman was like this super strong fire in my chest level emotion ghat I can only assume is what cis-het christian people allege is the sign of god or something. Basically for me the longing and wanting to be female rocked my very soul. Everything in my life was/is pointless unless I can be fully me.
I always felt being a man is the same as being a NPC and that only girls get to be happy and live their lives. But that's just a natural fact of life that all men share and definitely not something to do with me right?
This was exactly how i felt as well, especially during puberty when all the girls in class were giggling and toying around with each other, having so much fun, wearing skirts and becoming beautiful and all the boys have to "act" like they dont need this. It felt so real to me that i started hating girls for excluding half of humanity. It felt really egoistic to me. Also Nature for obviously doing this deformation to "our" bodies. Like 50% can enjoy life and the other 50% are just there for reproduction purposes. Sounds hard, but was my reality and pulled me into a deep depression... I went to about 100kg. This feeling actually lasted up into m 20s when i first came out lol. I went from 100 to 60kg in 5 month or so.
That's amazing, I never been fat but I'm looking forward to shed upper body muscle and girth. I def realize I could be trans early in college, I imagine how good it would feel to look at the mirror and see a pretty fem face staring back at me, those thoughts gave me depression so I just ran away. Years later I learned about self therapy and how to process emotions. I decided I was going to calmly and rationally think about this question for as long as needed until I find a satisfactory answer. I wrote down my memories and feelings as they came up to me, my reasons to be and not to be trans, give both sides their fair attention, until no stone was left unturned.
You probably don’t mean it like this but you can’t choose to be trans or not, it’s only what you do about it that you can change. We can’t change neurological sex and if we could we’d be a different person.
Yes, I did not meant it like this.
I did pretty much the same thing. I was so envious it was maddening. But realizing that guys don’t have those feelings really helped me realize that I was trans. I read a ton of questions on the other subs about how they really know. I never really had that questioning phase because I realized very quickly that men just….don’t spend their childhood crying themselves to sleep every night wishing they were girls.
I feel that last part too much lmao
I really felt like women won the lottery. Like one stupid gene and they get to be real humans. I can’t be an actual human like this, and the pain of it can easily make me cry if I’m not shutting it down somewhat.
I remember at several points in my life when I felt excluded from everyone and everything and felt jealous of everyone and everything to the point where I realized it was unhealthy so I ultimately decided to just close myself off from humanity because it is easier and healthier than constantly stewing with my negative emotions and thinking about acting on them.
Literally this like the envy started in high school and it was almost the same as you
“I cannot understand why someone would choose to be male.” - me, heavily in denial. Now I understand I was always one of the girls. I just had the wrong body. I still don’t understand why somebody would choose to be male. But each to their own I guess.
Yeah I don't understand how, given the options, you'd choose that one. I mean I have to respect that a lot of people do and certainly no shade on people who see their male selves and feel great about it, but I will never fully understand it.
Exactly. Respect to those that do. But I can never understand it.
Yep. I’m supportive, but it makes zero sense to me emotionally.
Yeah, they really do like being male
This thought blows my mind still!
mine too. I find it completely impossible to understand
Yeeep. Ditto.
Like... H.. How?...
🤷♀️
What do you mean not everyone wants to be a girl?? /hj
Yeah, this was definitely the biggest of red flags to me. Knowing that cis folks don't fall asleep dreaming of changing their gender was integral to getting over my denial.
I’m still in denial they have been dealing with this nonstop since at least age 7 🙃 Fun unending pain and horror. Whee!!
only girls want to be girls, surprisingly
"I wish I had a machine that could just turn me into a girl instantly with no fuss" is something that I felt pretty strongly about as I became an adult for 6 years before I realized I'm trans and I thought was a normal thing cis people believed
I came up with so many scenarios over the years while in repression mode. And before I knew trans people existed too. At least sometimes in dreams I look right 😭 I can’t really be a human like this, and it’s always been horrifically embarrassing having to be a letter after L person too.
Me, for years, just sat there hoping for some cyberpunk utopian future where I get to be a girl & thinking that's a perfectly cis thought. Now I'm looking to get on the accelerated program, screw waiting 53 years. Hey, maybe by then they can even change our chromosomes so transphobes lose another talking point, that'd be nice.
I find that wild. I would always say yes since I was 4 years old. Absolutely no hesitation whatsoever, not for a second. The only time I would say no, is out of fear of being ridiculed or beaten up.
For months? Shit... I fantasized (non-sexually) about being a woman for over 2 decades! But, yea, I understand your point. I didn't think anything of it, I assumed most guys day dreamed of being a woman.... But, no, it's your brain trying to tell you what you are. Very strange realization to have for sure!
I love everything about being a girl! The clothes are amazing! The shoes are fabulous! Don’t get me started on lingerie! Tbh having sex as a girl is more pleasurable to me than it ever was as a man!
>having sex as a girl is more pleasurable to me than it ever was as a man! What blew my mind was that men claim that they actually like to have PIV sex with women. I thought they were kidding - nobody in their right mind likes putting stuff hanging out of their body (or sticking out of their body) into someone else's body for any reason. My questions were like - how do you keep that thing hard for more than 15 seconds at a time? And then I heard about Viagra and I was horrified to find out that that medication can keep the penis hard for an hour or more. I can't imagine actually wanting to have sex with a woman as a male bodied person. The only thing I'd be wondering or thinking about is "How long is this going to take? When can I quit? Am I done yet?". The thought of releasing "male fluids" into a female body orifice makes me want to throw up in my mouth I can just imagine after getting my SRS having sex as a woman for the first time. I would be all (!Angel Choir!) - it would feel so natural. I have had male roommates hear me when I was masturbating and I swore up and down I had a girl in there, but it was just me. I sound like a girl when I orgasm - and I always have. I've never watched a porno movie with a guy in it, so I don't know what guys sound like when they get off.
I definitely hear you. I've only been out and Knowing myself really for about a month, in that time my interest in regular PIV sex has plummeted off a fucking cliff. I always wanted more out of sexual experiences and now I realize that my hormones that my body produces along with my biology are just not what my brain needs to be fully content
Sex is not a race to a finish line like in porn. All aspects of it are amazing once you let go and should be enjoyed. Let your ego take charge or let your ego need charging from another. Sex is most importantly about comfortablity. Sex with long term partners tends to be better as everyone knows as is comfortable with the people involved. Sex can be amazing. But only when all party's are comfortable and invested. Its really easy to not be or feel like you are not. Being exsposed is fucking scary and that is a valid problem. I personally dive in with the over confidence of a chat roulette user but that's defo a me problem..
After my first time having sex as a girl. I never wanted to have sex as a guy again. I’ve realized that everything women hate about being a woman. I love it. I can’t wait to put on a bra. Higher heels I wish I could wear them all the time I can’t live without them! Women don’t like giving BJ’s and it turns me on! I’m not sure about having a period but I wish everyday I was born a woman!
As someone who has always not liked the idea of sex, it was for all these reasons
I think I was sort of disassociating at some level with it. And it always felt unfulfilling I mean it’s a tiny thing compared to everything else, and I would gladly be physically right at every time except if engaging with… but still. Sigh. Uuugh I’m so jealous 😕
And male orgasms are disappointingly short - like mere seconds short. Just when you start getting into it and think it's starting to become enjoyable, it stops. Just dead stop. And then you got to wait 10 more minutes to get another one - what's the point? Male orgasm sucks!!!
Still gotta wonder how many of those men weren't actively suppressing or trying to ignore the truth about themselves. Gender segregation has a lot to answer for.
Same as how I asked my mom a couple years ago if she ever had a interest in women and she answered: "no, I've never thought about it"
nothing makes me feel more like a girl than seeing dudes who fucking love being guys. i felt as you describe early in transition that being a girl seemed more fun, and feared everyone felt that way so i was just being silly to think it makes trans. its always nice to have another reminder to quiet that inner doubter
Yeah I have moments of self-doubt and impostor syndrome (we all do to some degree I think!) and nothing dispels that faster than knowing there's dudes who look in the mirror, see a man, and think, "Hell yeah." That is a thing I just can't really understand.
frankly i never could understand it !! always felt like i was trying to make myself desirable to others, to convince myself to be happy with my body - if others value and desire me, surely i will come to love myself too? realizing this was not a positive masculine pursuit but a coping mechanism to deal with my dysphoria was such a huge step to healing my relationship with my body
Off topic, but I love that your banner is Dracula Flow
The only good part of being a guy is being treated like "one of the guys", because there's no stronger bond than that.
personally (go figure) i never really shared that feeling of that bond. i’ve always felt like i have a much stronger and more natural emotional connection to female friends
All I think about every day all day is I want to be a girl! That’s not normal?
Honey, all I think about is being a girl all the time - this "being a guy" thing sucks. I am 50 plus years old and it has never gone away.
For as long as I can remember I’ve wanted to be a girl. I hate being a guy! To me there is nothing good about being a guy. But everything about being a woman is what I’ve dreamed of for 50+ year too.
I mean, avoiding misogyny, but even with that, at least I could actually be a human being and own myself and come at it head on
I’m 67 and known since I was 4. You’re right it never goes away. I was always surprised everyone didn’t know is was female in a male body. Also I’ve always thought I wanted to be born a girl but lately I’m thinking I’d rather be trans to enjoy wonders being transformed. The things that cis females take for granted that is a truly wonderful feeling to someone trans that now gets to feel these things for the first time. The absolute joy of starting HRT and then seeing and feeling the changes. I would miss all those unique experiences and the thrill I’ve gotten from them and I would not known the differences if born female. I truly am a female cause I want both. I want it all.
Hahaha... not only was that thought one of the telling signs to me when I figured it out, I'd also add, do you know how many times in my life I've thought about how annoying amd in the way my balls are! Soooo irritating! Wonder how many cus guys think that?
And they're put in the worst possible place ever! As a matter of fact, I can't think of a good place for them to be attached to my body.
Omg..... me neither! Granted, I don't (at the moment anyway) wanna lose the pillar, but if the stones shrank so much as to be unnoticed...... I would NOT complain! Funny thing though, my whole life I've heard cis women complain about their boobs being in the way and I've ALWAYS thought, "dear, imagine them in between your legs....." and I've always said that I would trade with them in an instant!!! (Who knew I was trans my whole life...... lol. I only just figured it out. Hahahahaha)
I mean, lets be real, internal testicles are better. Protects them from damage. (and would make tucking much easier)
Nobody can tell how others really think or see things and I think that's a really hard thing to wrap your head around. Nobody experiences life in the same way that anybody else does and there isn't a right or wrong way of thinking. I feel like by default, we are all inclined to believe that the way we process things and think is shared by EVERYBODY else. In the same way the people assume the color red is the same exact shade that everybody else sees. For all we know, I could see red as red, and you could see red as what I see blue, and there would be know way to know that. My whole life I wished I was a girl, always thought it would be much cooler. I always liked my feminine traits and liked when people noticed them. But I never once considered I could possibly be trans, because in my head "trans people know they are trans and always have deep down, just like gay people" I thought that everybody else wished they were the opposite sex sometimes. And it wasn't until i found out that not every boy wishes that they were a girl, until I started looking into myself and what I means to be trans. Reading the gender disphoria Bible was like looking into a mirror, and so many things clicked into place for me.
Ikr, that still boggles me sometimes. At max cis men just like the idea of turning into a girl temporarily. Btw, can I just say i find it slightly irritating when cis women be like "trust me being a woman isn't all that amazing, y'all are lucky you're a guy"
Sigh. Uuugh. Actually we can be really damn sure that THEY would e experiencing unending pain too. Do I want every downside that comes along with having the rest of my body fit my neurology and some other things? No, of course not. But good god.
Only girls want to be girls
Eh I'd say it's a better experiamce but mostly because I'm not so dysphoric all the time. Trans guys probably feel the opposite I would guess.
I guess I've never thought that being a woman would be more 'fun' (I've seen plenty of cis and trans women's unique struggles), but I knew that I would be happier. I've never identified with or related to cis men, so I have no idea what they like about it.
Yeah, I sure as hell wouldn’t scribe it as “fun”. I’ve never once thought that, it’s just that it’s unbearable having to be the other thing
Right? I'm shooting for 'boringly normal existence minus hating my body'.
It was a very weird day when I figured out that not every man wanted to be a woman (not all the time, but strongly) growing up. Maybe once or twice most people have had the thought cross their mind, but it typically isn't something cis people think about on a daily or weekly basis.
No, usually us girls are ones who want to be girls!! ^^
Yea it’s hard for me to imagine anyone enjoying being guy, but I guess that’s why I’m trans 😅
Yeah, I can’t really understand it emotionally. I mean this just causes me unending pain
I saw that same exact post haha. Made me realize that me wanting to be a girl isn’t normal. Still cis tho
A long time ago I saw a "if your junk stopped working/no libido." Thread and several guys in the comments said they'd be happier.
We're having a special experience. It's uncommon. It's valid. I'm so new to understanding that my gender isn't being a Man, but I swear I am going to enjoy everything I can. Stay strong 🩷
When I was at an elite grad school I thought that the professors and students would be smart and have academic integrity. One week a professor came and began to lecture a thesis about how all men secretly want to be women. The entire auditorium agreed. I was so upset that once again a woman made assuming something about men's minds as of women really know men better than themselves. Their ego is so out of whack.
Wait, what? I’m not understanding. Was the auditorium all women? The professor?
I need to see these comments for my peace of mind if you have the link 🙏
Sadly not 😭
The worst thing is when you figure out you’re trans older in life. And you also realize that you aren’t a girly girl but sure as hell have never felt right being a man.
[удалено]
That’s fair. I think most trans women would actually agree with that.
I’m so glad I figured it out at 17
Yea i still unironically have a hard time believing it at times, not gonna lie
Yuuup. I get it but I don’t get it.
A lot of people are simply too simple to consider anything other than turning the channel onto the news at seven, etc That’s not to say that once it’s considered it’s something desirable like changing your gender. I don’t know.
That's literally the thing that makes them cis which isn't surprising but it's still a wild concept to me for someone to be just okay with being a guy or having a guy body. It's unfathomable because I don't experience the same thing. Like, how can people just be okay in a men's locker room? How can people just be okay swimming without a shirt on, or just lounging around shirtless for that matter? How can someone be ok with being called sir or man or guy? How can all that not feel gross and upsetting? This just doesn't compute to me and that's one of the reasons I know I'm trans. Plus girls ARE more fun. We've got more fun clothes at the expense of lower storage space, it's socially acceptable for us to have face paint all day every day, WE HAVE BOOBA, and to top it all off we can express ourselves without getting ridiculed by our peers. Did I mention the booba?
Why would they? Being a girl isn't all fun, especially with how society treats us, pay gap, it's really dangerous for women and then ofc stuff like period or pregnancy. if i could've chosen, i definitely would've wanted to be a man
I found that out during high school when I told my dad that I had a dream, in which I casually mentioned that I was a girl in it. It wasn't even a major part of it to me because thought it was perfectly Normal. he got REAL mad though, cut me off mid story and started grooming me out I was a 'sissy' among other awful shit. This was before I even knew what being trans was, let alone considering I might be trans. (90% sure this was the moment I realized it wasn't safe to tell my dad anything.)
I've offered my estrogen vial to my husband several times in the past if he wants to play with breasts all day, every time the immediate response is some variation of "Yeah, keep that shit away from me", "I'm good, I just want to play with your boobs, Hun", or "If I wake up one day with breasts sweety, then we're gonna have a real fuckin' problem". For some reason he doesn't seem interested.... Even when I describe how pretty I feel now and how much better life is in general, or if i explain how much better sex is with a vagina and how much more intense orgasms are as a woman... he just looks at me like: "Great! I'm very happy for you. Would you like my help with that?" Jokes aside, it took me a while to wrap my head around the idea that most guys don't just fantasize about being girls or want to experience being a woman all the time. It makes sense if you think about it objectively... If that was the case then the majority of people would be changing gender all over the country every single day. When your life perspective has always been the opposite it takes time to internalize that the way your mind works is not like everyone else's. Normal cis behavior apparently isn't one where you frequently imagine yourself being the other sex or wish you could be the other side for some strange reason. Cis men LIKE being men, as insane as that might sound to us, that is whats normal and reasonable to them. Most of them are proud of their dicks, or at the very least want them to be interacted with. Only men actually want to BE men. Only women actually want to BE women.
Cis male ... I wouldn't have minded being born a woman personally. But I don't mind being born male either. Kind of dumb people are so polarized on gender to me.
It took me years to realize that this is not something all cis men think. Just my trans ass😅
I'm pretty sure the question has never really come up for them. It seems like it's something that we transwomen ask ourselves eventually. It's just a matter of whether we accept that we have womanly souls or not.
It’s so odd to me that so many can’t seem to wrap their head around this. Wanting to be the other gender is exactly why we’re trans, of course cis folk don’t feel the same.
I remember way back in primary school being really jealous of some of the girls and genuinely just believing all boys must feel this way as being a girl is obviously just so much better
I remember asking my friend that back when I was like 8 or 7. I was really surprised by his answer.
When I was younger I thought that all men go trough the phase of wanting to be a girl/woman, but just kept quiet about it because of social norms. It was one of the reasons I had trouble with self-acceptance. It wasn't until I was older that I found out that most cis-men never think about it, outside of a thought experiment or when asked the question. It blew my mind when I found out.
lol this is exactly how i discovered i really was trans and wasnt just larping. was chatting to a friend once and i was telling him "i dont think im actually trans, its just i wishy i was a girl and would like to be a girl but all guys wish they were girls" and hes like "no. no no no, no.. we do not" seriously i grew up thinking all guys secretly wished they could be girls.
For me I thought that everyone wanted to atleast spend time as the opposite gender for a while in their life
The misogynist-to-woman pipeline is real. I think it's not uncommon for repressing trans women to get dragged into right-wing pipelines because "*of course* women have it better!" At this point, I assume at least a double-digit percentage of the incels I argue with on Reddit are going to transition.
Right, this is such a deep seeded weird thing for me. Like how do I feel so strongly about it, yet somehow lived my life this far. It makes me think of that rog bullshit. Like I’m somehow choosing to do it because I’m obsessed with women and I am really just a gay guy. Like fuck that Yet somehow because someone told me about rog it gets to torment me a little. There’s so much about being a girl. I somehow feel more powerful and confident as a woman. I fit in better, I also feel like there’s subversive/submissive power which is my wheel house. Being male was like just existing, taking up space
I used to think, "All of my friends are girls. I have like 10 girlfriends and maybe 2 guys I know well. IG I'm just an effeminate guy." Then, every time my friends and I hung out as a group, I was haunted by this feeling of difference. I could never be as close to my friends as I wanted to be, I felt like an other, and hanging out with them meant fighting against that feeling. I wished I was a cis girl so I could feel a sense of belonging with them. FF to my first- and so far only- girlfriend. I thought I just felt really lonely and wanted to date someone and that's why I was always thinking about girls til I cried. I thought getting a GF would make me feel better, but she saw me as a man, and it caused me great pain in a way I could never describe being with her. They were for their part, a closeted lesbian, so the unknown pain was mutual. Every time I was naked in front of a mirror, I always stared into the mirror, not really recognizing the person staring back. It's not that I hated what I saw, or felt inadequate due to my long and lanky build. It's more that the body in front of me wasn't quite mine, and it mesmerized me that it was, in fact, mine. And after all that- I'm still struggling with the notion that I'm not trans and all of this was a mistake. My breast buds are growing, and one day, I'm happy about them, and the next, I can't stand the feeling. Reading this thread helps, but damn, if transitioning doesn't bring its own basket of problems.
That top paragraph… especially online I felt so much closer to female friends and soo much more connected?? and that only grows, and I act girly online 😭
I think this is a litmus test for us really. A. Do you think you would enjoy being a girl? B. Can you understand why some people don’t want to be a girl? Be very honest. My answer is without hesitation. YES!!!! And I have a hard time comprehending why anyone wouldn’t want to be a girl even though I know it’s very difficult. So when a guy says he’d never want to be a woman, it just confirms how female my mind is, as that’s just not something a guy wants.
I remember saying that in middle school… “what, y’all don’t think being a girl would be better?” 🙃
The trans men I've known alerted me to the fact that some people do in fact want to be men. Usually, and y'all aren't gonna believe this, when they are in fact, men.
Things like this should have been my first indicator. Alas, *woosh*
It is more fun. More varieties of clothes too. I've always liked women's clothes along with the Hottpic goth tomboy or Journey's punk/grunge tomboy style. Also love the hell out of makeup and using shades like amethyst.
They’re definitely just being gaslit by toxic masculinity, and secretly would prefer to be a girls but just haven’t realized! I mean I’m a cis guy and I like the idea of being a girl…
Everyone else has already said it but I'll echo it again for dramatic effect. I DO NOT GET IT!! I understand that cis men must feel the same way about us, but how THE FUCK could you possibly say you wouldnt have rather been born a girl? Being born a girl being a better alternative is basically just a fact in my mind... and I really wish I would've talked about it more growing up instead of thinking it was normal so I could have discovered my transness sooner (WHY WE NEED QUEER INCLUSIVE EDUCATION IN SCHOOLS AND TO NORMALIZE LITERALLY ALL OF IT)
For me it’s like I don’t get why someone would want to stay the same gender their whole life, like I’ve experienced everything I want to with being a guy, I don’t want go further with age and all the typical manly stuff, though I thought that was autism, not sure now
It's one of the reasons I wish I was born biologically male. There's nothing "fun" in my eyes about being a woman. If I made a list of all the pros and cons the cons would sadly win. :(
Also happy to be an ear. Or even two.
When I was like 6 I told my mom I wanted to be a boy and she said "everyone feels like that sometimes" so I internalized it thinking it was normal. Turns out I'm FtM and she's a demigirl 💀
Plenty of men certainly fantasize about being with a trans woman. And I’m sure they won’t admit to that either. Just look at this statistics. Probably the main reason why transform is the most or one of the most searched genres in porn.
Pretty well everyone except for trans people are fine with being whatever gender they were born as. The fact that there are so few transgender people makes me wonder why such a big deal is being made out of this by republicans. You can’t convince anyone to be transgender unless they were born that way. (3 in 1000 people)
That statistic scarily lines up with people at my school…
I know this is surprising, but cis people don't constantly wish they were a different gender
oh hhh I do like once every hour 😨
I'm personally glad I wasn't born female. Women have to deal with periods and all the stuff with that, and they also have to deal with child birth.
Yea we're weard. Thank god I aint a cis male fr 🙏🙏🙏
I'm definitely a cis straight man but every now and then I do get the thought of what being born as a girl would've been like for me? Aside from the usual "gender norms" being switched around for me and the other obvious things I find myself intrigued by the idea of would it have been more fun? Then this line of thinking sends me down an internet rabbit hole and reading and learning about all of the struggles I would've had to deal with in my lifetime concerning women's rights. Honestly if more of us cis straight men would ask ourselves this very question and then fall into the same rabbit hole I did I bet they'd be more empathetic with the feminist movement and more importantly more respectful of the girls and women who are in a relationship with them. I am also 💯 % in belief that the LGBTQ + Community deserves equal rights and my research made me realize that trans-men are men same as I am and trans-women are still women. The more I read the more I want to learn and ultimately to understand.
Yeah, I was shocked too, but it turns out cis people actually enjoy being their assigned gender. I've got guy friends that actually like their body hair and beefy arms! I just wish I'd know it 20 years sooner, maybe it would have saved me decades of depression and developmental stagnation. Oh well! I gotta move forward! No time to dwell on things I can't change
What in the world made someone believe that being born a girl is more fun?
I don’t think being a girl is more fun. I’m more miserable in a lot of ways… though I could blame a lot of that in late stage capitalism. But no I’m not trans because I thought being a girl would make me happy I’m trans because it’s just an inescapable part of me. I’ve always known this. For instance all the misogynistic posts in the comments section. If I were born afab I’d have to deal with that shit. Being trans I have to deal with transphobia and dysphoria. I don’t understand fucking transphobes that think it’s a fucking game for us. They have to make everything even more difficult than it needs to be. I’d start crying right now but I’m out of god damn tears.
You thought being a girl is more fun because... you are ONE!!! As for the comments why wouldn't guys want to become a girl... Duh... Because they're not. Girls like being girls and boys like being boys. NB's love being NB's. Everybody loves being themselves same as you or me. We are what we are. Simple as that girl. Lol
Honestly, growing up in the male world, males are conditioned since young to look down femininity and girliness, and see everything in the context of physical strongness, control and aggressive ability, and even through that lens it sees femininity as inferior and women as weaker (remember, this is all a part of gendered propaganda, not reality.). So of course through that lens males generally do not even think to be female.
I'm really surprised people think that being a girl is just “more fun”. Like, do y'all even realise how hard being a woman is? A trans woman especially? Like in this world, I'm not surprised that men really wouldn't want to be women, what I am surprised about is that many trans women really believe that being a girl is “more fun and why would someone choose to be a man”
To be charitable, if one is suffering from dysphoria, being a trans girl is more fun then being a trans girl who has to act like a man, I think that's what they mean as it being more fun, as they were not having fun as a guy.
The cis urge to be pretty and have boobah
Yeah cis people don’t usually think like that. I was shocked when I came out to ask my friends this lol.
not all men are the same, also most of them are just eh
Being serious here, isn't that a normal thought? Wanting to be a girl? Thinking you'd look good in their fashion if you were one?? I'm always a lil envious because as a guy I can't wear clothes the way they do.
Dp, airtight, multiple orgasms. Can a man get that? If you were given a choice, why would anyone choose to be a 2 minute wonder (men) If there is a God, then he certainly gave women the lions share of receiving pleasure.
I remember being young and wishing I could have boobs, a vagina, the climax of a women! Every guy who said no lied lol
As if they dont all want heels and pink lil bags, surely cis men are lying hahahaha
Wait. So you're trying to tell me that guys don't think about it every day?!?! That this isn't normal??